The art is very beautiful, well done, and evocative of the adventure. As others have said, I struggled a little bit with the text; I think this is mostly the letter "a" for me at least with this typeface. It's fine when a closer up but hard to parse. I also would recommend when expanding this to consider the following feedback:
- It wasn't clear to me from the outset that Keeka was a renliska and that's why the planet would take their mindwipe as a declaration of war
- The heading hierarchy visually is a little confusing. The colored bars make me think that this is a higher level at first glance than the large orange text.
- The keying confused me as well with the numbering on the map and area 2 being more complex and elaborate with its subareas. It maybe would have made it easier to navigate if this larger subarea were presented first or last. Not sure! I think it was confusing because 1 appeared to have sub areas like 1.1 and 1.2 but they were not present on the map.
I think the use of landmark, hidden, secret was a nice way of organizing the bullets. The ideas and themes here are excellent, and once I was able to understand everything holistically, I think it works quite well as is, just some organizational notes up top. Some of the other feedback regarding how well this would work with Cairn versus using a different system I think makes sense. Would be super cool to see some custom backgrounds for space fleet characters in an expanded version!
