Push, push, push. Expanding your comfort zone.

Wow! HOLY FREAKING WOW! That's all I can say about this. I was reading it and my heart was pounding in my ears. Awesome! So freaking awesome! I'm a big fan of pushing outside of my comfort zone as often as possible, and even just reading this did that. Thank you for sharing this! And I can't wait to hear more!

Wow Derek, you never cease to amaze me. You don't post as much as you used to, but when you do, you are definitely still as brilliant as you ever were.

Just curious, how did you get the gig on the diplomatic side?
Because I set up my new company in Singapore, I became a member of the Singapore Business Federation, and Monoglia was just one of their many trips. Though “diplomatic”, I don't meant to imply it's actually the Singapore government, but same kind of thing. — Derek

You are truly an inspiration.

Nice! So I guess this answer my question whether you can wish for something you don't know :)

Derek,
I talk about you all the time to my friends.
I am finding that I am repeating all the great advice you have shared.
I love pushing my comfort zone.
It's addicting.
It's fantastic.

Rhan

Great to hear about what you're up to Derek. I've been missing your updates ! You've sure had a busy time in the last months... stay in touch, all the best !
Caelen

Derek, this is amazing....
I love this , thank you for this article.

just what i wanted to hear :) just gave me so much energy :) thanks a lot :D

you are not existing, you are truly ALIVE.

Keep on keeping on. Derek. I am looking forward to meeting you next time you are in Cambodia or our paths cross elsewhere.

Spot on Derek! :)

Here's a thought - where would we be if we NEVER did anything that made us nervous? Many of us would have never gone to school, applied for a job, or gone on a date... it's only because the pressure to do (or the pressure of not doing) those things are so high that we do them.

But after these things, many of us stop pressuring ourselves to do the things that make us nervous and get out of our comfort zone, but when you stop getting out of your comfort zone you stop growing.

If you make a habit of challenging your self and pushing boundaries, other challenges are put into perspective and you become more comfortable dealing with increasingly challenging things.

As they say - there are great things waiting for you just outside your comfort zone, you've just got to push the boundaries to find them :)

The least unusual experience jumped out at me the most. Baby! Congratulations!

I'd gotten the impression you guys weren't going to be staying in any one place too long, though. So he probably won't have to do the military, at least not in Singapore, right?
He will, yeah. We're permanent residents of Singapore, probably getting citizenship next year. This will be our home-base for a long long time, so yeah he'll “have” to do his National Service military duty. — Derek

What is comfort?
If it's being in a place where you belong and are accepted, it doesn't only depend on us.
If it's performing at a level less than our ability, it may be laziness.
If it is a sense of peace and purpose, then it could apply to any situation, even painful ones.
The drive to stretch ourselves can have many origins. This in itself may be more uncomfortable than the actual stretching,

follow your heart not your fears...
the journey goes inside :-)
serve God and serve everybody!

I love you mate.
Let's meet face to face in Singapore in Jan 2013 on my stopover to Sydney.

BiPolar Disorder / Manic Depression "used" to scare me.

See attached video of my arrest:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TfpTZuncvmQ

I have developed a program which helped me overcome this "mental illness" and I perform live music in Psychiatric hospitals around Austria and German to inpatients, encouraging them to begin their "Full Recovery. Australia 2013 and North America 2014 scheduled.

At the moment I am under INCREDIBLE pressure:

- An underground PIMP issued a DEATH THREAT publicly four (4) times.

- I was (3o mins after this serious threat), BRUTALLY ARRESTED by the POLICE when all I needed was some "friendly assistance"

- I was HANDCUFFED in 5 places to a bed for over 32 HOURS with no FOOD nor WATER in the same Psychiatric hospital (Klagenfurt, Austria) that I performed at 2 days beforehand!
They paid me 300 Euros to provide this 60 minute "musical service" !

- Most of the town where I live (Lofer I Love You) think I am CRAZY

- My parents, most of my family and many CLOSE FRIENDS hold no glimmer of HOPE that I will EVER be FULLY RECOVERED!

- I MISTRUST THE POLICE in AUSTRIA and I have applied for DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY from the AUSTRALIAN GOVERNMENT in Vienna (I am an Australian citizen and not often this "stressed")

- I walk down the street now to do some shopping, bopping to music and "acting like" I don't care.

I DO

On Thursday 16 August, I PERFORM in another PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL (Ybbs on the Donau) for "STRANGERS" WHO I CARE ABOUT. My tour of 10 - 15 hospital performances winds up at the end of September and moves on to the UK in November / December.

We have a lot in common my friend . . .

God bless and flow like you know ;-)

Thanks for sharing, Derek. I could live vicariously through your post! Sounds like an on-going adventure :) keep your stories coming!

i half-expected this to be statements from ALL DIFFERENT people, but as it kept going, i thought...

wait, is it possible ONE PERSON has done all of this?!

:)

well done, indeed. it's not about how much stuff we accumulate or where we've been, but the experiences along the way, how we contribute, and how we grow.

and i've been very lucky to find myself in one of those "wow, i'm here! and it feels SO natural—i can't imagine this NOT happening."

thanks again for the great late-night (at least in the States) musings...

and congrats on the baby!! (name?)

I was surprized that you have not ever heard of the word Eurasian, but I suppose that as an American - you need not have done. The Singaporians are categorising you as a European, should it not be Amasian, or Amerasian or something similar. Too like Caucasian. Just playing with words and having fun.

You definitely get around, and I have been to some of those places in silly situations. Perhaps some of our out of comfort zones could be the routine and normal, can you guess that I for one like excitement.:)

Great advice! Congrats on the baby! If he grows up I'm Singapore, he'll surely hate chewing gum! :)

Great advice as usual. So easy to push, push, push yet we often find it so hard to take that first step. Have been trying to push my comfort zones lately. Feels great. Now to find more ways to push, push, push.

Don't you think that "expanding your cultural comfort zone" is just what pisses people all over the world in some Americans? Thin, pseudo engament, with a corresponding "wow!"...
Never said I was thin. — Derek

There's a great quote that I heard from an African American mystic named Rev. Barbara King (in Atlanta):

"If you want to have something you've never had before, you're going to have to do something you haven't done before."

Such brilliance - both of you.

All best, Ben
Nice once! Thanks. — Derek

Thanks Derek. As usual inspirational and timely. You always seem to send exactly the right message exactly when I need it. Just one thing I don't understand. If you are American and married to an Asian woman, why does your son's passport say "Euro" asian?
:)
Here's the Wikipedia page about Eurasian. It was news to me, too. — Derek

Love this post. I do this with jobs. If I don't have that nervous feeling anymore, I know it's time to switch things up. Was there an 'ah ha' moment that made you realize the power of pushing yourself out of your comfort zone?
Nice! I like the way you put it. Not nervous anymore. Me? No “ah ha” moment. Left home at 17, and have been pushing since. — Derek

WOW I am floored and flooded by emotion. Something primal inside of me was awakened by this post :-).

Hi Derek.
It's might be funny, but just a few moments ago, I was thinking about your words you said in the past. It was something like "Do what scares you and what you are excited about". Just now, I opened my mail box and saw your message...
You've always inspired me to get out of comfort zone, and I must admit, this is the only way to grow.
I am impressed with your life approach and happy for your achievements. Your family must be proud of you. Congratulations with the baby. You had a CDBABY, now you got a real one, who will see a good example of his dad.
I wish you all you wish your self and thak you for keeping in touch with your fellows musicians. We all love you.
God bless,
Elvira.

That was a great article. It really resonates with what I'm going through right now.

I've always been terribly shy and I'm only comfortable with familiar friends. To break away and from that I decided to change jobs. I used to work in a lab. I had the same co workers for the past 4 years. I got comfortable and was scared of change.

But I did it, and now I'm 3 months at being an inspector for a county job. And everyday people are arguing and yelling at you, but at the same time I know that I'm little stronger and I'm not as afraid to talk with people as much.

So its work in progress.

Am always impressed and inspired by you Derek, will shake your hand one day.

Cheers

Very nice as always, Derek.

I find the expanding comfort zone very true.

I'm not sure if you've heard of 'The Parable of the Trapeze' by Fran Mckendree - I think it'll strike a chord. :-)

Thanks for this Derek. For a minute I thought I was reading something abstract then it hit me along the way that you were talking about your experiences. Amazing. As always, food for thought and congrats on your baby boy :).

Truly impressive and remarkable. I'm sittings here thinking about comfort zones and realizing for some being quiet and still for any extended amount of time may actually be what pushes them outside their comfort zone. Good thing to remember, that it's not always about doing but about achieving that little bit of anxiousness and doubt..."can I do this??"

Thanks for always getting my wheels turning and my mind stretching. :)

Thanks, it is good for the weary challenger to be challenged by another challenger. I receive my current challenges until they become comfortable! Then I will find others! Thank you, Derek!

Expanding your comfort zone can also be a matter of sticking at the one thing for a long time.

You might want to be a truly great writer (or musician, politician, scientist, etc), but it's comforting to think that it's only something someone else could achieve. It takes guts to dedicate yourself towards that (long-term) goal. You probably have to get out of your comfort-zone to do it.

But the actual day to day tasks of working towards that goal may be quite mundane and unchanging. Writing, writing, writing, if you're trying to be a writer.

So perhaps there are two kinds of expanding your comfort zone - what you describe, which might be called "breath-first" and this other kind, which you might call "depth-first".

I'm trying to think if there's anything to say about the relationship between them. I'm not sure. I suppose there's time in life for both. But does focusing on one detract from the other... again, I'm not sure.

Would be interested in hearing your thoughts on this.
YES! I totally agree. My last 3 years, described here, have been very “horizontal”, as you say. My previous 20 years were very very “vertical”. Similar approach, though. Like diving deeper and deeper into your chosen field. — Derek

In hindsight, I think "horizontal" and "vertical" mightbe better terms than "breadth-first" and "depth-first". They came from the computer-science person in me :)

Random thought!:

Alain de Botton said:

"One of the finest protections against disappointment is to have a lot going on."

That came to mind while reading your post. It seems like it'd be an incidental benefit of constantly trying to expand your comfort zone.

This reminds me of the first time at 4-H camp, Derek. Didn't want to go but the parents said go. OK, fine, go but scary as all get out, ten years old and no social skills to get arrested with or get girls in trouble! Parents kept their word, though and came up the middle of the week to check on their one and only beloved son and sure enough, the proverbial truth that you cannot go home again rang true. Must be having fun with this push stuff. BUT, come the end of the week, NOBODY remembered to put the little push, push kid in their car and the little ten year old, Mahty, was left and abandoned at said camp, fifty miles from the nearest filling station. No Sir, no more push, push for this kid. Play it safe, all white, no black notes, no blue M & Ms in the contract!

Hey Derek

Congratulations on the new arrival. We had a new arrival a few months back and it's starting to feel like we have a routine coming together now.

Good post my friend, I liked how you put it together and kept me guessing on it's direction.

I read sometime that you liked a lot of Charlie Mungers advice. Do you think your post has any cross over at all with CM's advice on 'Only swing your bat at certainties'?
Munger is my hero. But no overlap with the “certainties” quote here. — Derek

Yeah, and there are things so much more amazing and world stretching than this. You get to pick how deep you go and in what dimension. Most importantly, I hope you're having a good time.

Alas, so scared is good. I'm on the right track. Thank you for sharing your story.

"What scares you now?"

For some persons, it could be a phone call of their banker ! :-)

If you cant expand your confort zone by travelling on the earth, because you need a lot of money for that, try to travel inside yourself
Agreed. I don't mean to say that this is the only way to expand. This is just the tale of my last 3 years of very externally-focused cultural expansion. But before that was 20 years of diving inwards. Traveling isn't necessary. — Derek

Daymn, Derek!! You've been BUSY!! I'm still speechless, gats to take this all in first.......WOW! Now, that's what they call 'diving right in', alright.

Inspiring as always.
Thank you for that.

This sounds like an interesting life. Very inspiring.

Congrats on the baby! Thanks for sharing this,inspiring as always! What scares me now? Not being sure of what's ahead:) And not being sure that I see people for who they are until it's too late:)

I love you. I felt the expansion while reading this. It's a feeling full of awe for life, big waves of energy flooding through me. Thank you. Though I don't know you, I feel close to you.

Hi Derek;

Dad. Welcome to the adventure.

Singapore must be giving you a lot of opportunity, which is good to hear. Even better to hear is you are not ignoring the opportunities as background noise to a direction you have set.

I have to say that since reading your book, I've been keeping my eyes and ears open more. Whenever I get the chance and my wife's schedule matches, the mobile office comes out and we go and set up in a out-of-the-city location, and enjoy the change in culture, food and environment.

I'm looking forward to repeating something similar to your Cambodian bike ride, but probably in Vietnam. I spent some time in Bangkok for some training, and went walkabout out of the foreign areas. I'd say Vietnam will be another culture shock that I'm looking forward to experiencing.

Is Singapore a place I should experience (short term 3-6 months. Working holiday perhaps)?
Hmmm. Probably not. Singapore is mostly comfortable. Its culturally-interesting things are subtle, not as huge as Japan, Vietnam, India, China, or Indonesia, for example. — Derek

Congratulations on the baby! That's definitely a new adventure in and of itself! Thanks for sharing.

I must admit that I am amazed to see you in a suit, though you wear it well, and your incredible intelligence and world views make it easy to comprehend your position in that room. But... where's your beautiful long hair? Do you still have a little pony tail in the back, at least?
Nope. All gone, after 14 years. ☺ — Derek

you know I've been blessed to be out of my comfort zone on countless awesome travel adventures but what does my head in is public speaking, I lecture at University - no problems there, but I do research and have to present this at conferences, serious science conferences, and boy oh boy I lose sleep in the weeks before...I just really don't like pushing myself out there, I fear I will never find it comfortable!

Spent decades of my life discovering new parts of Europe with the push as comfort zone mentality my m.o. doing the touring artist thing and the free life thing....then my marital relationship tanked and I got tame. Without an anchor to return to in between exploratory trips. Einstein's house, Goethe's house, Carl Jung's place, day trips off tour, deep into Alps, tiny German and Swiss towns, helped me as I'm now doing the vertical inner landscape version of push as writer now, going great. Need to apply your inspiration to next part of artistry, had just began so today, performance calling me back, stoking the envisioning muscle that so courageously fueled everything back a decade, working it a anew to tweak back into shape my have no bounds place. Grateful for your habitual push push. Solo environs currently keep me around too many stuck in mediocrity types who I keep working to forgive and tune out and hold onto the juice you drink. Self protecting my soul again
to access the all things possible limitations be gone space, thank you SO much! Congrats on the new fam!

Fun Fun Fun .. sounds like my childhood, Derek ... Eurasian was a very common Hong Kong word in my school ... so awesome what you are doing and how you are expanding .. I am very stuck in a comfort zone at the moment and know I must boot myself out soon .. but being in the cz for now is helping me consolodate and complete boring things .... best wishes as always ...

p.s. My latest music rec for you Derek ... here is a band Vivarta, electronic music live, I saw in Australia from Japan . not very well known but I loved their stuff and they were so sweet and sincere ... http://youtu.be/GM6zc9AgA20

Derek, you & I go back when you first started CD BABY. We used to go over tricks of the trade, how you always had great advice. Thoughts were constantly. .. Push..push...push... The more you push yourself the larger your dreams will become true! And by the way.. The best advertisement after that is as you well know is by word of mouth! Congratulations Derek once again on your success in life. You never cease to amaze me! Godspeed!!! Lori Nevers.

Congrats on your marriage and baby!! That journey alone is a major accomplishment ;) Beyond that you embody to many of us a man who's an innovator and adventurer, who thrives on challenge and change, which ables you to inspire us ~ thank you for candidly sharing your adventures with us!

as i started to read this post i thougth it was shining a light on the comparative experiences of different people.. not all yours! You're living on the edge man.. totally! What a ride.. what a timely peace of inspiration you've provided.. thank you so much for sharing!

Peace Love & Funk!
Dino :)

That nice read(felt in my heart) .every human having different comfort zone but your perspective of comfort zone is really nice but it happen only some people in current world because the people are scare to put their foot in different areas...

"Hello Derek Junior! Welcome to sive.rs, its a strange place, but great things happen here......Oh yeah the new dancing guy, that's your father. He's kind of like a guru in training, but don't worry, in time you'll be one of his greatest teachers....so remember...push push push and expand Dad's comfort zone"

Hi Derek
You are truely an inspiration! I am working hard towards reaching a stage where I can experience the variety of stuff that you are right now! Keep pushing!:)

Inspiring? People could not fathom why I pursued an online masters degree in psychology at 60. Same reason. Push back the envelope. Learn. Grow. Share. Improve the lives of others. Thank you for the continued encouragement. Congratulations on the baby!

Derek,
I love it. Moving a couple times as a kid has made me hunger for change. Whether it is changing jobs, homes, sports, paths I love the energy I get from doing something new. I believe I am more comfortable in change then I am in stagnation. I have at some points in my life wondered if it was a fault, but I now understand that need. What scares me... Doing the same thing, in the same place, in the same way for the rest of my life. Thanks for this post.

David

Sounds like a post written by the Old Spice guy Or The Most Interesting Man of the World...

I'm on the edge of the grimy city, walking rapidly to the social entrepreneurial start up downtown Johannesburg.

Dodging shoppers, traffic cops, pickpockets and food vendors, I hurry to the shop. I stop to share a laugh with the car guard...

Well written.

There is only one element missing to start testing and playing with pushing ourselves.

Money.

And I'm not talking about becoming a millionaire, I'm talking about being able to create some business, or value, or company, or whatever, that can provide you with, at least, the food while you are pushing your confort zone.

Thanks.

I routinely push myself out of my comfort zone. I love doing sports such as snowboarding and running. I think this definitely translates to my personal an professional life. Getting older and having a family makes you less prone to break out of that zone though. This article reminds me that I'm not pushing myself enough! Thank you Derek!

Curious about this diving experience. So, this was your third dive? That means you hadn't qualified as an open water diver, and the instructor took you to *40* metres?
Yep. Not sure why. It was my Advanced PADI course. — Derek

Great stuff, Derek

The message I get from this is that if we never have the courage to step outside our self-created bubble we'll never get farther than we are or become what we can truly be. Kudos, my friend. I'm very glad that I've had the privelege to connect with you.

Your comrade,

Jeff "ProfessorMetal" Irick

You continue to be an inspiration to me. Amazing how much has happened in your life since we last chatted at that little diner with Ariel.

Keep pushing!

Hi Derek,

Congratulations of the birth of your son! I always find your posts and videos to be like an energy that pushes me forward. When I read through the amazing things you've been doing it made me wonder what motivates you to push yourself. Most people live in a cultural square whereas you are in a cultural circle that keeps on expanding. I use this square and circle analogy in my own life when I am analyzing my creativity. The square seems safe but limiting whereas the circle is a life that exhibits growth. Well, I guess you could say your posts challenge me to tap into the limitless possibilities of the circle. Thanks for helping me continue to shape my world. Looking forward to more posts and videos.

P.S. You've also got me thinking about expanding my thoughts on where cultural exploration resides in terms of the rainbow framework...like life figuring stuff out with regards to the rf is endless.

Jeez.......I'm nervous just getting ready to interview people for a radio show I do! Derek, I appreciate you are so willing to share with little or no ego.

Thanks for this great post Derek!

Hey Derek, I know that description must sound unbelievable to many here in America reading it, but it sounds normal to me. I consider myself blessed to relate easily to what you describe, because I have experienced something similar to it in my 16+ years experience in Asia, 7 of which was in Singapore, and the whole time of which I was partnered with Asian women. Your business success and financial status will, I assume, offer you more opportunities than average. I hear from my friends there that Singapore is doing much to severely curtail the influx of "foreign talent" there - care to offer your observations of that point?
Not many observations. The changes have been very subtle. It's definitely “Issue #1” here, though. — Derek

A baby boy! Cool...that alone is a lifetime journey!

Congratulations Derek! I'm taking Kai to the first day of Pre-K today. Enjoy your fatherhood. :)

peace,
seanrox

Inspiring ! My steps are so much smaller.
But, I've decided to do a cartwheel and eat the wild mushrooms in the neighborhood this month. Also adopted a Native American elder for the first time last week. Oh -- and I'm loaning my log cabin to total strangers from England next month-- but I've done that before-- a man from France-- but now we are friends-- and have shared vacations several times.
Oh-- by the way-- love Dominica--good choice.
Congrats on the new son and wife. :) my husband & 3 grown kids have been my favorite adventure :)

Thanks Derek. Very inspiring as usual. I've always wanted to be the first one to comment on your emails. One day! Right now maybe I'll make the first 100. Congratualtions on the baby. My sons are Eurasians. Talking of mixtures, one of my favourite foods is Nonya.
Love.
Paul.
Paul! Good to hear from you. When we first met 12 years ago, and you said you lived in Hong Kong, that sounded so out of reach to me! Now I can't wait to compare notes. — Derek

a parent eh? now that'll push ya!

Congrats Derek, what you lived seams to be thrilling ! Pushing my comfort zone is definitely something i'm also focused on, especially culturally. It seams to me that it's one of the best ways to know myself, i'm living with the tought that diversity is the trully great thing that make me realize who i am.
Thanks for giving us an insight on how it feels to keep on pushing !

Terrific post, as always! I love your presentation of these vignettes from your life. Makes me ashamed at how many of my own pushing-the-comfort-zone stories are far back in the past. It's sad that somehow we tend to let our worlds shrink as we get older; we have to make a conscious effort to keep expanding them! I know my mission for the day/week/month/year/decade!

Thanks for the hard-hitting reminder.

Thanks, Derek.
I'd like to buy you a beer in Timbuktu some day.

Great post...you deserve something good today :-)

Very inspiring - we should always do the things that scare us. I was happy to hear about your son - that alone will change your life inside and out, completely. Soon I will be driving my son to school in Vancouver, BC, stopping for waterfall hikes on the way, spending a few days in the city getting him settled, then taking ferries to whatever islands I choose on the way back to Idaho. Raising him and seeing the world through his beautiful, intelligent, imaginative eyes has been an amazing adventure. Time to take on a new one (or ten!)

Welcome to the world! Thanks for the post and congratulations on your family!

Absolutely perfect! So inspirational. Congrats on becoming a Dad!

Hi Derek,

I'm 25 days away from participating in my second triathlon. This one in Washington, DC.. And I'm not an athlete. I'm on year two of a "bed and breakfast" adventure in Brooklyn. And I never was in one before. And Im starting a creative adventure that will be shooting in the winter. It has been a lot of pushing

Keep the push and reminding us to push.

Eve
Niiiice! Congrats! — Derek

You are an amazing person. I am dazzled by your remarkable spirit. Thank you for your inspiration.

Selamat Pagi,

You're a "world " citizen now Derek, You've gone total Borg !!
Awesome post, love the fearlessness, Please feel free to inspire me anytime. I'm restudying algebra and trig, it's amazing how much it realates to music and John Adams and Stockhausen.

Peace,
Eric

Perfect timing! Just what I needed this morning.

Congrats on all of your things.

Best looking guy in the room, D-Rock!

Just gonna say one word WOW .... And Hi new dad been that a couple of times myself ...

CONGRATULATIONS! You have a son! Brilliant!! He's Eurasian like me. So does he look Western or Asian or truly Eurasian? ;) Love the pic of you in a suit. See you sometime in Hong Kong or when I make my way there next May for Music Matters again :) Wishing you all the best!
Oh and yes EXPANDING your comfort zone is such good advice ;)

Hi Derek,

I agree with pushing one's comfort zone. I am expanding my stage presence comfortability by participating in my local toastmasters club.

Something I noticed that helps me with expanding my comfort zone is trying to stay in the present. When I do so it keeps me from thinking I need to overcome every situation in the past where I could have expanded my comfort zone.

Amazing, Derek. Thanks. Really inspiring.

I've long believed that the more we do things that make us uncomfortable (a little or a lot), the better we get at it.

In other words, doing and feeling what's uncomfortable is a skill, and, like any skill, the more we practice, the stronger we get - at the skill itself as well as overall, as people.

I've found that there can come a time when being outside our comfort zone starts to feel like the norm. If we're outside it more than we're inside it, that's how it can happens.

I wonder if you've found this as well.

Great post, Derek, and CONGRATS on becoming a father!!! I recommend these 3 parenting books (my all-time faves):

The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness, by Edward Hallowell, MD

The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, by Wendy Mogul

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, by Marc Weissbluth

I was talking with a friend about comfort zones on Friday. We were talking about the city we live in, and how many people view downtown as 'unsafe'. I live and work downtown and I walk everywhere so I view it as just fine. Twenty years ago when I lived in the suburbs of this city, I viewed downtown as unsafe. Now it is my zone.
That is an example that illustrates how we are comfortable with what is familiar. I read a great article a few years ago that said that comfort zones should be called "zones of familiarity" because they may not be all that comfortable, but they certainly are familiar. Think of a bad marriage, the article said; it is not comfortable but it is familiar, so people hesitate to leave.
Leaving our zones of familiarity, be they physical, emotional, spiritual, or in our mind is important. It is important to help us grow, but also to help us learn to accept that what others do is not 'wrong', it is just unfamiliar to us. And given time, it may become our comfort zone!
Derek - thanks for another great blog post. Your life is fascinating.

Derek...extraordinary post. Your insight is amazing... and articulation of thoughts are clear and motivational!

Thank you for sharing!...AND congratulations on being a new dad...as THIS will be your most challenging and rewarding ... well beyond comfort zone ....undertaking of your lifetime! ~R

Thank you Derek.

Being a parent - ah, that's so "normal" and SO far out of your comfort zone at the same time. Your son is very lucky to have you as a dad.

You attract some wonderful people! Most of the people commenting here are fabulous!

So much to say, and most has been said already. Thank you Derek, and thank you to the other people writing.

Excellent and inspiring topic and examples! "Example is leadership." ~ Albert Schweitzer. Pushing yourself to dream more, learn more, do more and become more is enlightening for those around you. Recognizing, receiving and using inspiration to push yourself is confirmation of an engaged soul, yet the act of pushing others can be tyranny. "... a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive." ~ C. S. Lewis

Hi Derek,
I am submerged in a new un-comfort zone right now. persevering through the worries because the light at the end is so bright.
Cheers,
MIKE

Like another commentator, the baby news jumped out at me, too! Ha! (Single-minded me!) Congratulations! He or she will undoubtedly teach you yet another meaning of moving outside one's comfort zone. Parenthood is a wonderful teacher. Our daughter Alice, now 9, completely rocked our world - in the best ways possible. She demands that we stay open—to whatever might happen, and whoever she might be, which is often difficult or uncomfortable to do —but is also, I’ve discovered, the path to joy.
(I'd love to feature you on my site, The Parent du Jour. Take a look & let me know if you're interested. Peace.)

Truly amazing, Derek! We all have those feelings at times. We all need to heed your example and recognize how our fears of the unknown, or of our perceived weaknesses, can be spun to positive, life changing perspective shifts.

You're an inspiration, and I am grateful to learn from you. Congrats on the new addition !

-mac

Derek you've outdone yourself on this one. I love this concept and am a strong advocate of stepping outside your comfort zone in general. Well done!

Hi , Derek

I liked very much your post. I think we have everyday situations to push from our comfort zones. Week ago while i was walking with my cousin there was a drunking man laying on the ground with blood on his face. Nobody was caring, like an crowd effect. we called the police and emergency, and together with other people who was also willing to help for other human being.
I contacted a famous polish blogger, when he announced that will visit Mongolia. I reached out and today we met and had together wonderful time, and tommorow we are heading together for a trip to countryside. Those are the situations that can push your life forward. Small steps that can change your life. Same with the Mongolia Meet Up. If I didn't contact Mark and Chris a week before the meeting, I wouldn't meet with them, and I wouldn't know that person like Derek Sivers exists. I wouldn't be with today state of mind, it would be different me. Like Descartes said " You just keep pushing. You just keep pushing. I made every mistake that could be made. But I just kept pushing"

Being a writer and a musician it has always been enjoyable for me to interview an artist and later get to open for, or play the same festival with them. Sometimes even to have a gig on the same stage where you had interviewed someone who had been your hero in some way can be quite a rush.

When I'm having doubts about my course of action, you always have a way of validating that what I'm doing is the right thing.

First of all, congratulations for your newborn baby boy. Here in Virginia, we are just starting our week and this blog post couldn't have come much better than Monday morning. I am feeling energized by it and it is giving time to rethink about my life and where it is going. I need to push myself out of the comfort zone. Thanks for sharing your wonderful experience with us.

Derek,

A few months ago, I read your post on Good Goals. The timing was so perfect that reading the post proverbially (I don't even know if that is a word) knocked me across the room. Every day, when my Monkey Mind wants to figure out what to do out there somewhere, I think back to the beauty and simplicity of doing what is right in front of me. That's it. So simple. So elegant. So peaceful.

Enjoy the ride,

Julie

Congratulations on the new arrival, Derek!

So many "hell yeahs" began with a single one. Yes LIFE...I will play. I will love and learn and share. Yes, yes, yes! Thanks Derek the timing with this is perfect. Cheers to you and your family, with baby in tow you are certainly on a wild new adventure of a life time! Congrats.

I envy you so much Derek! But thanks so much for writing such a great piece!

Wowza. I found myself getting more and more psyched up every paragraph.

And it's true... Most often (almost always), doing what I'm most afraid of us EXACTLY what I should do first.

Keep pushin' amigo :)

I like others above thought you had a copulation of people and things they had done. What do the next 42 years hold in store? Can hardly wait to hear about it! And promise I'll start expanding my comfort zone also.
Eurasian is often used in bird identification a Eurasian Collard Dove is basically a large pigeon size dove with a black collar that has somehow wondered to the United States via Cuba and Florida and now resides as far North as Virginia. Think these pigeon like birds are out of their comfort zone? : ) By the their looks they seem to have adapted very well.

So glad I ran across your
articles a couple years ago after emailing you for advice I no longer have to ask but just watch and listen to how your story plays out. You are an amazing individual .
Thanks again for all the responses you gave me.

Thanks Derek
Dominic from Philly

Personally I feel drawn to push my comfort zone in the realm of creativity, and I feel like the internet has become an indispensable tool in the exploration of this vast realm of possibilities. A few years ago I was just doing 2-D artwork, and now I'm making videos in which I play the role of an unpredictable character based on The Easter Bunny. Everyday my inward and outward worlds are becoming blurred and less defined. The key is, if you start giving yourself the green light mentally, things start happening!

Wonderful news Derek, congratulations to you and your wife on the birth of your baby, happy days for you all, first steps, first laugh,and so much more.

Hi Derek!
Interesting. I've traveled quite a bit as well, been in some unusual, perhaps uncomfortable situations. I guess what I've learned is that respecting others perspective and differences can go along way. Even with language barriers, our body language and overall vibe can and does help us 'reflect the light.' I'm a hitch-hiker from way back, at least 8 trips across this great country of ours, all 50 states, Europe, Canada, Mexico, Australia, Northern Africa, all on my thumb! Kind of an intense 'two way non-verbal communication' standing on the side of the road (0r trail!) trying to connect with the other human rolling past without saying a word....had some great connections, blessings for sure.

I wonder if in such a dynamic lifestyle you will really stay in one place for more than 10 years... : )

The best line in this was:

I’m just a musician from California!

Yeah, right :-)

In addition to being a fantastic inspiration I hope it also gives a pause to those who tend to "been there done that" too often or too soon.

As many comments allude to, just knowing what experiences you have willingly embraced rekindles dreams and hopes as one reads it. Thanks for sharing. Wish you many more discoveries of what intimidates you!

Amazing! Thank you for sharing!

Obedience is Human Nature

The slave obeys others

The free man obeys himself


Lo Po Hu- The Tao of Silence pg. 98 astrolog publishing house 1998 ISBN 965-494-006-x

A book recommendation for all who still READ. It's a must read for people who want to abandon their inner comfort zone.

Derek!

What a fabulous post....and congratulations on your new baby!!!!
This was amazing to read on a grumpy Monday morning :)
Thanks again!

Wendy

You are now a Muslim! Congratulations, and may you live happily ever after

Walsalamualikum.

I'm sorry to seem pedantic on this, because this is a powerful piece of writing, but you open with a description of something that's "only the third dive in your life".

If you were doing your PADI Advanced Open Water, you would have had your PADI Open Water -- correct? That typically involves nine dives. So, how was this the third dive of your life?

I'm also really curious as to how you could have spent long enough at 4om to get cold, given that the longest time PADI wants you to stay down there is 7 minutes. And, also, as to where in the Caribbean it gets dark at 4o metres.

Thanks so much Derek. Having one of those "what the hell am I doing" days. Needed to hear your words. I was just saying to a friend the other day that I have pushed myself to do things throughout my life that seemed very uncomfortable at that time but have brought degrees of success--but those things are trivial compared to your story. Congrats on the baby! Another new chapter for you.

How Stoic!

What a coincidence! I'm in that process too. But few steps behind :-)
Absolutely helpful to me at these moments. Thank you!

I'd love to see what a Eurasian baby looks like...and did I miss the name....boy or girl?
Congratulations. Good luck on this the parenting adventure where your child may often put you out of your comfort zone.

rada

When i started reading this post I couldn't help but wonder where you were taking it...it become crystal clear afterwards. Keep pushing till you get to your next higher level. Thanks for sharing dude.

~Hilary

Wonderful article Derek! I think you hit the nail on the head for lots of people.

Very inspiring.

Derek,
As always, a very stunning article. I would like to share my experience with you. 9 years ago my daughter gave birth to a son. He was premature by 6 weeks, weighed 4 pounds and was given a very poor outlook for any kind of future. A week later my daughter had a massive CVA (stroke) and went into a coma. The next 6 months my "comfort zone" was pushed to the limits as I kept waiting for the bad news I expected to come. After 2 months of care the grandson was allowed to come home with us and the daughter came out of her coma. Nursing homes, and several life threatening events were the norm for my daughter for the next 2 years. Again my "comfort zone" was pushed as I watched helplessly to all these things that were happening to her. My "comfort zone" was pushed again as I learned how these events had to be treated. I could not take the care being given to her in the nursing homes anymore. My wife (bless her soul) gave me the opportunity to go back to school and get the training I needed to bring my daughter home. Its been 7 years now and the daughter is still in a wheelchair but is making more progress then anyone ever could have imagined. The grandson is excelling in school and even has started to write music. While I have never left the USA as you have, I still feel like pushing this "comfort zone" has taken me to many wonderful places in my personal and spiritual life. Thanks for your articles as they always make me think on a little deeper level.
Wow. Yes. Amazing! That sounds more difficult than anything I've done. I can't even imagine! — Derek

Oh gosh, Derek. So nice to read this (and see the picture)
Upon reading all of the above, I thought these were written by several people, but now realize it's ALL from you. Have you always been this balls out in your life? Starting at a young age, or did you begin this campaign mostly in your adult years?
No, that's just been the last 3 years. Before that was 20 years of focused work. — Derek

Well, I really needed to read this. A lot of fear holds one back from reaching the goal and beyond. We need to get to a point of saying, What's Next! I'm Ready! Let's go! Umm sounds exciting. I think I'll put aside all fear (I'm ready to get out of the comfort zone) and press forward (pushing through) Then.....I'm going to keep pushing. Thnx Derek for the reminder that fear has no place in my life.

Obedience is Human Nature

The slave obeys others

The free man obeys himself




A book recommendation for all who still READ. It's a must read for people who want to abandon their inner comfort zone.
lo po hu- the tao of silence pg. 98 astrolog publishing house 1998 isbn 965-494-006-x
This what I wanted to print first.Thank you Derek for still being! I also want to thank you for establishing a place where people could speak their own thoughts.
Comfort can lead to stagnation,apathy,rigid thinking,fear of otherness.

Wow! Those are some pretty amazing moments. You have come far!
I've recently begun the journey myself, of figuring out what I am capable of in this world. Testing limits and not being afraid to do something I never expected of myself.

I think of you often out there in world, and love seeing how far you've gone. you rock man. (:3

What scares me now? Failing to push through what ever difficulty I am facing and settling for average... I do not mind failure..from it I learn everything... I just to not want to be, or do, or become, or be with average...

Great read!

Derek,

I read your journey and you are the exception to the rule! You are truly an "A" personality type. You are such an inspiration to all musicians and meeting you through Cdbaby has made me not only a better musician but more of a business person. I have done more for my career than I would not have ordinarily done such as setting up my own concerts and editing my own videos because of the information you've shared. Doing this sort of thing teaches us to tell our life story as you have so clearly told yours. You are "Simply Amazing!" ...And I miss you at Cdbaby. God bless you and keep pushing because when you share your life with us, you help us to become all that we are intended to be and to push even harder knowing that we can accomplish great things. We love you Derek! Avis Harrell - Queen of Versatility

Thanks Derek for this post, truly the way I am trying to live my life. I'm still working on the advice you gave me back at INSEAD last year on starting a few businesses at the same time - not easy to find a few passions to work on at the same time!

For now I've distanced myself from Singapore and have been in Thailand and will be in Germany for a few years due to work but am still wanting to come back to Singapore to settle. What was your consideration for having kids though in Singapore? That's probably the one thing that makes me hesitate about staying in Singapore, but I see you came to a positive decision about it. It would be great to hear your cosmopolitan /soon to be Singapore citizen perspective on it. Cheers!

Hey Derek,
Solid, inspirational start to my morning.

You reminded me of the character from the movie "Limitless"!

Rock on,
A.J.

Congratulations on the baby boy and all the new pursuits, Derek! Wonderful post. Got me thinking. I've a somewhat similar arc to my life, and at 60 years old, after 34 years of marriage and the raising of two boys and all the while doing many of the other things I had a yen to do, I could perhaps give you a run for your money on the number and variety of experiences I've packed into those years. But arriving at this at one time nearly unimaginable age--do you know what is at the end of one's 60th decade? 70!!!-- I have met so many people who are not pursuing their dreams, for the sake of regular salaries and health insurance. And the very sad part of that, is that so many of our "health" problems are directly related to the act of NOT pursuing one's dreams. So, I keep trying, like you, in my own way, to share, promote, and live the idea, to young and old that it is NEVER too late to change course, and chase those dreams.
Keep putting out the posts, please!
Awww... thanks Maggie. That's so inspiring to hear. I always keep in mind the (true) story of the man who enrolled in medical school at the age of 65. When fellow students asked why he said, “I'm probably around for another 20 years. I might as well be useful!” — Derek

Such beautiful lessons here Derek, thank you.

All the snapshots thrown together on one page had a Tom Waits' "A Soldier's Things" effect on me.... more power seeing all the pieces in one box with the full back stories left to the imagination.

Thank you thank you thank you.
I love you, Amber. ☺ — Derek

I have found that the best learning experiences have been when I push myself further. When I turn around and look back, my old "comfort zone" is laughable.

....and geez, congrats on the baby!

Very inspiring I hope we can retain all our experiences for the other side

Ahhh... I love it. Tomorrow my wife and our two kids under 3 hop on a plane to end our 10-week trip working remotely in Costa Rica. We did it simply because we could. It's been amazing. We're already thinking about where to go next.
Posts like this keep us all alive beyond just the breathing part. Thanks Derek!

Definite Inspiration... I love pushing my limits... thanks for the reminder

I'm all for pushing out of the comfort zone but for me it's with a sense of purpose. I worked in East Africa (freelance), on my own, in my mid-20's, then afterward all over the world, often but not always with my soon-to-be husband. Somalia and Sri Lanka were barely safe in those days. But I took these risks always with a desire for service: saving trees/forests and making life easier and healthier for women, giving potters and other artisans something new to make and sell. We were creating fuel-efficient cookstoves! I learned so much more than I could have staying home that decade. By a combination of smarts, help, and luck, we are alive and well and educated by the experience. Songs were inspired, as well.

However, 20 years ago we intentionally put down roots here in Oregon, to help the land and community in a way that transiency can never do. Wendell Barry's advice to "stop somewhere" - doesn't have to be where you came from - was influential. Living in a place a long time gives you the knowledge of how high the river can flood, what the extremes in weather are, how the landscape has changed, what is being destroyed in contrast with what is being created. Every community needs people who are alert to these ever-changing conditions. And those people need to speak up to protect the land, even if that's outside their comfort zone.

Ditto for the need to speak up about racial and economic justice, to end the brutal practice of war, to make our societies better in every way we can. This is the greatest adventure: to help humanity evolve into wiser, kinder, and more joyful people.

I agree with some other comments here, that we can't just see our adventures through narcissistic lenses. Americans and Europeans feel entitled to the rest of the world as our playground, without caring how we impact societies as a whole and real individual people during our push-the-comfort-zone travels. I think it's a more delicate dance than you describe here, Derek, although the general lesson resonates with my life. Get out of your comfort zone and (while you are at it) tune into other people/other species. Testing your own limits has its limits. As one fellow traveler said to me once, "Isn't what we're after maximal learning per square moment?" What we do with what we've learned matters, too.

Thanks for the stimulus.
Yes! I really admire that approach. I've missed a sense of purpose in my whirlwind of adventures the last 3 years. Thanks for a great example. — Derek

Congratulations!!

I'm speaking more and more all the time...
on Get UP...Get OUT...and Get Your MOVE ON! Get up.....off the couch and leave the bon bons behind........... Get OUT....of your comfort zone! Don't allow fear of failure stand in the way of living your passions and dreams...for we learn valuable lessons along the way to take with us to the next adventure even if we don't end up exactly where we planned... The universe often has other plans for us! Failure only comes to those who never try! so Get up! Get out! and Get your MOVE ON! Trust yourself....embrace the challenges along the way... learn from them... and take them with youto your next big adventure!! Once we know just doing our best holds value......and that we'll learn from getting outside that comfort zone....we become more and more comfortable with taking that giant step... with taking a "chance"..... embracing everything we learn along the way of this journey called life!

And besides...it's FUN!

In July, 2013, I will play senior women's basketball in my fourth Senior Olympics... At 72.... I love the challenge...to push myself to reach my maximum potential physically and mentally!! And last year, I joined National Speakers Association in order to take my new speaking career to a whole new level. Talk about getting out of your "comfort zone"! but again... the challenge is so exciting and keeps me moving forward!!

Best to you,
kay seamayer... aka..Granny Globetrotter (tm)

Thanks for sharing, Derek. One headline blares rather excessively, however: The word reference, "I", used 27 or so times.

Momentary loss of Self occurs most creatively in the experience, and especially the creation of art. And then we "come back", and assimilate the new product contextually. In the end, over time, it all becomes an artistic experience, even as we "make the stumble part of the dance", as one of my musician friends sings.

But can it be that we (particularly Americans, it seems) have, over time perhaps become "Too special to ourselves"? Undue expectations, if shared as a culturally shared, and therefore largely unquestioned entitlement, can lead to excesses that require moderation.

There is a painful paradox to anonymity:

The Guru Convention came off as planned- No one showed up.

I decided to move to the other side of the world with a backpack.

100 days later, and I had finally figured out who I am, my unyielding passion and life.

I love your post, which almost reads like poetry. I think I have a few new things to add to my to do list!

-Elijah

Hi Dererk, I really liked the article . I appreciate what you wrote. I am dealing and growing everyday and I just have to keep on going into the unknown like you said. Otherwise I think you die if you stay stagnate . Thanks for the advice.

Hi Derek
we met years ago in Toronto at a CD Baby gathering, was impressed then, read your book, loved it! You are an inspiration to many! i don't read a lot of posts but I read yours always and Seth's! that's how I found your book!
Keep posting , it is a great reminder on living your life to the fullest and shaking off and facing fears! those of us who are able to do that find that there is a huge and wonderful other world out there!

I love the flow of this prose. Derek, your insights are always very refreshing. Thank you -George

This article could not have come at a better time. I've been reading your writing for several years now and am always inspired but this one truly struck a chord. Today, I am about to start training with a very serious personal trainer and it is WAY out of my comfort zone. When I'm not performing, I am a personal trainer myself but I'm an older woman and my comfort zone is to work with the over forty females of the population. My new trainer works with actors, bodybuilders and uber trainers who are working toward competition or some lofty goal, which I am not. What I am doing is pushing myself to see how fit I can get at this time in my life and to learn things from him that will make me a better trainer. My clientele will benefit and I will step out of my comfort zone and grow hugely! I was feeling quite daunted about the appointment later today but when I read this article, I calmed right down and felt nothing but the same type of anticipation I have before going onstage in front a big audience. Thank you so much, Derek! You continue to guide us and be a shining inspiration. Keep those articles coming.

As a member of a female folk trio, I've always been afraid to play leads on my guitar. Lately, I just take a breath and launch into one. Scares the heck out of me, but brings some real joy into my life. Thanks for the inspiring story.

Hey Derek,

I've been following your career since I put my first album on CD baby back in 2000. Its been amazing reading these articles that illustrate the evolution of your life and career. It really inspires me to keep up with my own stuff!

I agree- most things worth doing are scary, uncomfortable and seem crazy at first until you are through to the other side of them.

Pushing through is the way to go. Thanks for the article!

-Jen

Hey Derek:
Great stuff. I've been producing concerts for 25 years now and while doing a show in Carmel, CA is fine, it doesn't get my heart pounding like bringing Jay Z, Beyonce, Snoop Dogg and Ciara to Lagos, Nigeria for a three day festival in the middle of a huge, crazy, city with no concert facilities or infrastructure. The shows I have produced in Tobago and Provence, France and South Africa are the ones I truly remember and love because they push me WAY out of my comfort zone and challenge me to use the best parts of myself to interact and perform up to a very high standard even when all of the odds are stacked against me and you are exhausted and out of your element.
Congrats on the baby, you have just been blessed with the gift of "freedom from the bondage of self". The good news is that it is no longer all about you! Enjoy the ride.
Joe

Your words took me on your journey, a journey like no other. Thank you, Derek.

You've taken the road along the cliff, the one without any guardrails, and experienced the exhiliration of the ride and the lesson from it: Go do that again!

A fresh and memorable story, well-told as always. . .

Derek: Your mail is always something I cherish and look forward to receiving. Congrats on the baby!
I completely understand. At 72, I am now re-inventing myself and finding out that all the perceived obstacles we put on our path are just illusions of the mind. I have pushed and silenced myself for the last five years in order to finally grow 'within;' a necessary step. Now, once again, I'm hearing the applause and it's a wonderful place to be.
Enjoy. Enjoy. Enjoy your life!

In art and soul.
~ Gino

Hi dear Derek,
As you allways do, you focused so exactly on things that really matter. You are the only person that I can read in english. Your writing is so pure and true that it touches my soul easily. I use to speak and write in spanish and french only. God bless you and your ideas.

......the child is the teacher :-)

AMAZING Derek!!!!

I wrote a song years ago called "My Heart Knows" (but my mind can't conceive). It came to me while making my first CD and hearing God's voice of what was ahead for me in my life. It completely shut my mind down because I just could not believe that He was speaking of "my" life!!! BUT there was something in my heart that connected and believed! So years later as I stood on a huge termite hill in the bush of Zimbabwe, sang in an Afrikaan's church in South Africa (where no blacks had ever been allowed), spoke with women in a village raved with AIDS (because husbands were bringing the virus home from the city) on how to protect themselves against the virus, sang to and visited folks in nursing homes and hospitals in the Carribean and now travel nationally with a group of multi -millionaires (I'm not one YET) helping and inspiring underserved citizens on how to weather the storm of financial stresses...I've often asked myself..."what in the world is this girl from NY and NC doing "here???". There are still many days when I can't believe my life...but my heart always knew I would be here! The BEST part...THIS IS JUST MY BEGINNING!!!! So like labor...I JUST KEEP PUSHING :)!!!!!

Thank you sooooooo much Derek!!!! Congrats on your awesome son!

Doreen

Derek-
I paid you the biggest compliment I can: I forwarded your column to a few close friends. Take care!
RH

Derek, the more I follow you, the more I suspect that nothing in the post actually felt all that odd when you were in the moment, because that is your mission -- to expand your cultural edges.

I am reminded of a line you wrote in your book, which I quote regularly: "Obvious to you, amazing to others." You live in your obviousness, your differences, your gifts and your predisposition to give and offer support to others (as you did from the beginning w/ CDBaby). and it is, truly, amazing and inspiring for me to read your story.

Glad you're a Dad -- and congrats on contributing to the creation of a truly global community.

Awesome! It is actually because of you Derek that a fire was ignited in my life for living this way. Here is an example of what has come since - http://michaelaverill.com/?p=241

Derek~
Seriously, I think you are in the ranks of Mother Theresa, Ghandi, Oprah, Tony Robbins, Wayne Dyer, Winston Churchill, ...and every other forward thinker/philanthropist that has walked on this planet.
THANK YOU for the inspiration and the motivation to be my best self too!
WOW!!!

Derek, you are one of the smartest humans I have ever known and am glad to continue expanding past the comfort zone! Thanks for offering advice to open some of the closed doors in our minds! Your blogs rule and keep us all thinking for many days after we have read your latest information and inspiring stories and thoughts! Thanks again Derek!

Trey :)

You say you want to get Singaporean citizenship — don't you have to give up your other citizenships in that case?

Also, in case your son has any other citizenship than the Singaporean one, he'll probably have to decide as well when he turns 18. Depending on his choice he'll either have to do NS or not.

Like your friend above, i'm also bipolar. i just got officially diagnosed, and I'm taking medication I didn't realize years ago that my 'depression' was really bipolarity, and that the meds I was on at that time were wrong for me. And then I went through a long period where I had no money for seeing a doctor for meds, while my life was falling apart in the way that it does when your brain is sick and self-destructive.

I'm now leaving my comfort zone by admitting how sick I really am. This is scary for me. It's humiliating too. Living on meds - really living on them, and accepting that I will be on them for many years and possibly for the rest of my life - upsets me. But feeling borderline insane, tanking every job, getting into arguments with people, and ranting constantly, have all gotten pretty tiring, and it's time for a change. I can remain a hostage to my sickness or I can move beyond it, take chances, and be the productive, smart, funny person I really am inside when the tangled mess inside my head is in order.

What; scary is losing part of my identity, the part labelled 'crazy person.' I'm looking back at my life and seeing the mess that was caused by my being unmedicated, and it makes me cry. But I'm looking forward too, to a new exciting life, even though I don't know what form it will take. I feel like the Fool in the Tarot deck; head upwards and stepping into the abyss because that's the beginning of all mystical and spiritual journeys.
Wow! Yeah the inner-journeys are much more challenging than the outer ones. Huge respect to you for facing this head-on! That's amazing. Congratulations, already. — Derek

I always enjoy reading your stories, or listening to your lectures Derek!

I just moved from Houston to a tiny town in Louisiana where my wife is from. I always look at living in a new place like I am an explorer or Indiana Jones type. I have to acquaint myself with the local lingo and customs before I get to be "part of the tribe".

In today's world, getting comfortable in a routine proves more treacherous than taking chances! My mother (artist) mentioned once that the "turning edge catches all the light" in a painting and so it is with our lives.
In one of my many "push myself into a strange world" activities in the 80s while I was a therapist, I ventured to study electronics. I remember the entire class laughed at me walking in - simply for being female. Also, I discovered I didn't want to work in the shops back then as I was constantly questioned as to why I was Acing their tests "You're a WOMAN!", and there were pics of naked women plastered on the shop walls! So I figured it was a lost cause, and continued on as a therapist.
My LPC did not transfer from PA to Arizona when we moved in 06, so I morphed to a software trainer for years. Recently I lost my job. I was getting worried due to my nearing 60.
A company unable to fill an electrical panel builder position took me on because of that electronics training I picked up- over 20 years ago. And the walls were now devoid of embarrassing pictures. No comments were made about me being female. I was handed a drill, a back plate and schematic. ( I never mentioned I'd never used a drill ;)

Readers when you land in a small airport and the pilot has remote control of the runway lighting, remember the girl who was once laughed at for her crazy notion to study electronics. And, ladies, Sears now makes pretty awesome pink tool kits!.. which the men never steal.. ;)
Education, flexibility, and skills are the hallmark of survival in today's world. And as ever, thank you Derek and writers for your inspiration.
Brilliant! Great example, Barb! Thank you. — Derek

Great post Derek! You continue to inspire me!

Thanks for everything and congrats on being a father!

Best regards,
Matt Saperstein

Thank you for sharing your experience!

Hey Derek
Very interesting. If you want to expand your comfort zone closer to home try visiting one of the many Indian reservations for a different cultural perspective right in peoples own backyard so to speak. Most Native people I know would be happy to pour you a cup of tea and tell you their history- just make sure you have a couple of days at least lol. If you get back to California visit the Navajo or Hopi both different and very interesting, plus they have cool music as well. The Navajo word for eyebrow for example means "wings of the mind" and the Hopi have no words for time, that is to say they believe life is and unending moment of the now!

Hey Derek,

Thanks for sharing! Excellent Topic! Cant wait to read your next post! When are you coming back to NYC ? Please keep us all posted , the Songwriters Circle workshop you spoke at in Manhattan a few years back was very informative and informal.

all the best,

Matt Jamison
www. feedyourmindmusic.org

Derek, firstly, congratulations on taking a lovely bride and the birth a new born child (being a Daddy is finest thing you'll ever know)...secondly, there is The Amazing Kreskin(George Joseph Kresge) and then there is The Amazing Derek Sivers. I surely admire all your accomplishments. First thing I do tomorrow morning is ten push ups and then I'm going to push push push to have the world hear my original songs. Thanks for all you do! PS, I have dear friends who live in Bangalore, Shiv and Sudipta...wonderful people.

Be a good father. Open the doors for him.Raising your son might turn out to be your greatest adventure. By the way Do you know any agents that can help with booking in Japan. I have a son in Misawa Japan I would love to visit. I had cds that were fairly popular in Japan at one time but I never played there. Sure would love to go now though.

a quote that keeps me going - When you have come to the edge of all the light you have and step into the darkness of the unknown, believe that one of the two will happen to you: either you'll find something solid to stand on or you'll be taught how to fly! (Richard Bach)

Life is a Verb and we need to be an active participant

What's a comfort zone?

You never cease to amaze me. You live every moment to the fullest. I still have to think about my comfort zone. Once again thank you

yeah, I am pushing myself as well this year. I am taking lead guitar lessons because I joined an all gyrl band and have always played air guitar. You know it isn't as hard as I thought but definitely not easy. I will continue to push myself in music until I burst for I have nothing better to do and I love it. Thanks for inspiration!

A baby!! Congratulations to all three of you. Hope Mother is feeling fine. That's wonderful news. I'm very happy for you. You must be bursting with happiness! Tell her she's wonderful from me too. I hope it was an easy time. Amazing!

I'm 37 and feel like I made a mess of my life. No savings, some debt, partner on another continent.. Do you think it's too late to do something great? I feel pretty scared right now.

Wow! Congratulatons! Thanks for the great email....very timely as I have been push push pushing myself in a new direction for almost 2 years now. Got married for the 1st time, my family had given up. Creating new music, channeling my views of justice and values into action, booking a tour and turned down a gig that would have made all this really hard. And I would have felt stuck. You have done so much since our meeting in Nashville years ago. All the best to you! Thanks.

Wellllllllllll, when a man of Derek Sivers' caliber emails you and encourages you to comment on his latest post, you've got to take up the gauntlet!

An amazing read and definitely a testament to the freedom that makes life 'life.'

The freedom is not haphazard, unrestricted recklessness - on the contrary, it gives way to the success, experience and blissful and love-filled adventures that Derek so poetically references and expounds on in the above text.

Some great anecdotes, here, and ones that made me laugh and smile with sincere contentment - what more can a boy ask for?

Lastly, I will say, to Derek's credit, that as an up and coming musician and record label CEO, having a clear, open and personable line of communication with the Founder of CDBaby (among other ventures) has put a little more light into my career path.

(bandpage.com/bobbypeace for sounds!)

With gratitude,

BPeace - 2012

Derek, thanks for the reminder to keep living life! I don't feel that you are doing extraordinary things, but you are most certainly an extraordinary person, continually living life like it matters (which, I find, it does!)

Thanks for taking the time to share this.

Congratulations!!! May God continue to Bless you. This is extremely wonderful. Blessings always.

As a direct result of your influence Derek, we (Desert Wind Music) have managed to cross cultural barriers and find a presence we could never have imagined. Alan Scott Bachman, my Jewish husband, wore a turban to a Sikh Temple in Salt Lake City last week as he reached across cultural barriers and embraced the Sikhs in their time of mourning. He was quoted on KSL Television and numerous other media outlets. A few months ago he introduced Sheikh Karim Abuzaid at an Islamic Society event at the University of Utah. A few months before that we did a concert to help the African Methodist Episcopal Church rebuild. All this in Salt Lake City, Utah! We'll be playing music with Arab hand drummers for Jewish Renewal's high holidays this year in Scottsdale, AZ. (And much more like this!) All of this comes from moving beyond fear of the unknown and what people think. The only problem with your awesome approach is that time flies so quickly. On the other hand, we can certainly say that we lived life in this existence. Taking it on as it comes - going with it. Going with you! Love you Derek! Thanks again for another amazing piece. ~Andalin

Wow... I agree with Rita on this one Derek! Wow... You never cease to amaze me Derek!! I kind of dig that song that my homeboys from Illinois wrote years ago, Keep Pushing On... by R.E.O. Speedwagon!

Sincerely, MrNDVERSE

You know Derek - every time you post something, which isn't that often lately, I absolutely have to read it because I know it's going to be something that hits home with me on some level. But this post in particular hit home in a different way today.

I've been a teacher for Chicago Public Schools since 2005, and as much as I really do enjoy working with kids, I feel like somewhere down the line, I allowed myself to drift into a life I never really asked for in the first place. My parents, always looking out for me, after college steered me in the direction of becoming a teacher in order to have a paycheck and insurance. Yet, since I was 17 years old, my number one passion in life has been music (that's how I discovered you in the first place btw - CDBaby - I also met you at TAXI Road Rally several years ago and had a brief conversation with you - which you are just as down to earth in person as you are online). The thing is, although I always had my dreams set on music, over time I guess I unconsciously allowed music to become a hobby and my teaching to become my profession. That's not right, especially when music is non-negotiable. It all flipped on me when I didn't even notice and one day I found myself living a pleasant and peachy life...but that's not me.

It's so easy for us to become comfortable with our paychecks and insurance, but this past June, I decided to leave it all behind because there is no denying I am on this planet for music. I saved up enough money to survive until April of 2013; one of the main reasons for doing this is to step outside my comfort zone. It's one of the scariest decisions I've ever made, but I love the idea of building my own life on my own terms. I have absolutely no doubt that I can build a music career if I set my mind to it - I need to understand what it may be like to struggle and to figure out where my income is going to come from when I have no stable job to depend on. It hit me hard one day that I had just been living in fear and it was time to let go and do exactly what it is I've always needed to do...I feel so liberated right now and life is an adventure all over again.

I must say I truly admire the fact that you've stepped out of your comfort zone in SO many different ways that you describe here. It's obvious you don't let yourself get too cozy for too long. I mean, even cutting your ponytail off I'm sure has something to do with your need to always change things up. I remember how crazy I thought it was when you left CDBaby behind, and gave away all your books, etc...but then I realized your the kind of guy I strive to be - I think you have a sense of peace within yourself that I haven't fully found yet and it seems people only find that when they are truly searching for it, and truly searching for it means stepping outside your comfort zone, whether that means exploring yourself or exploring the world around you. I do think I just took my first step in the right direction though, and I'm not turning back now. I posted a blog entry about this on my band's site in June and I linked it here if you ever want to read it.

Thanks for doing what you do Derek - it's inspiring to know that you can find the life you're searching for if you just have faith; we don't have to conform to any norm - it may be cliche to say that but there is so much truth to it if you just believe it's true and live life accordingly.

Derek, that is quite an experience. I had a lot of management and leadership experiences in the past that finally finished with me writing a leadership theory as a post-doctorate work in the Syracuse University. And now I live my happiness-samadhi zone with music.
Derek, It is wonderful to explore your own potential in the Path of evolution and giving to your Being the confidence that we all deserve in ourselves.
Musically yours, AnayaMusic

Derek, thanks for sharing. Comfort zones are scary and sad. Life deserves better.
Congratulations on your baby, this new addition to your family will certainly make life interesting and fulfilling. Cheers!

That was great, Derek. I love the photo too. Vocal coach Felicia Farerre is currently working with me to get used to speaking all the time with a 'yawning' feeling. It's one of the most uncomfortable things I've ever done after nearly 45 years of limiting my voice with various emotional/physical patterns!

I love that you've pushed yourself culturally as well as other ways!

Derek,
On my morning commute, often in the dark, whenever I see someone on a motorcycle for example, I ask myself: who feels more alive this morning. Last week I saw a hot air balloon rising just after dawn, which drew the same question. After reading this post I'm going to have to raise the bar on what constitutes feeling alive.

Please keep shining the light on the road ahead for the rest of us.
Bob

The last 3 questions are the most difficult yet important ones to think about.

Greatly inspiring! This reinforces a lot of my current decisions, some made in great fear but with belief that anything is possible and that I will never achieve anything by not exploring 'what's out there'. Thank you for this post!

jsncruz

Inspiring and grounding at the same time. Excellent post that contained many different angles from which at least one will touch a nerve with each reader. With me it reminded me of what I could do. I'm committed to a project that is both exciting, and scary, but it's still working for same company. Going to do something with real passion and make it successful, or go down in flames trying! I was so tempted to leave my job but the project came through and it dawned in me as a gift to be able to go out on a limb and do something different......become the Che Guevara of our company and change it from inside.

Your life story is also inspiring to me and a reminder that we all have it within us. We just gotta do. Fear is good, keeps me focused, but nothing happens until something happens. My First step becomes my first victory.

Thank you so much for letting us touch your latest adventures. Haven't heard much from you for awhile and it's obvious why. Getting folks to step out of their comfort zone is very difficult, not just physically but mentaly seems to be even harder because people get stuck in their thinking and fears from the data stuffed into their heads earlier in their lives.
You are very inspirational and I feel very lucky to know you, THANKS.
Island Frank

Great!
When I miss you too much, I go to TED.

FANTASTIC article Derek!

way to go! inspirational. I just lost a $1k sponsor today and kind of feel exhilerated - some wise guy (person) I heard once answer the question "where will the money come from?" with "where ever it is right now" Thanks Derek - I still think of you every time I sell a CD thru CDBaby.

Derek,
Your article just spoke to me .. I feel stuck I don't know how to get out of it!! I need to break this Fear of Unknown!!

Catapulting out of comfort zones is my specialty! Helps maybe to never want to be bored! After 4 children, and owning and teaching in my own pre~school, I went back to college at age 33 to become a jazz singer......hmmmm: turned out well, so I started exploring sound healing ('cause that's what singing improvisationaly really is). 20 some years later I now spin plates of many different colors and love my improv living. I think it takes curiosity, courage and love to continue to see the moment and co~create the next. Thank you for your inspirations, Derek. You feed souls with your words and actions! Hope to see a picture of your beloved son/family soon...

Awesome!!!!! Very inspirational!!

I can't figure out what I like about this article, and it's annoying me. Thanks for writing it nonetheless!

Derek,

Great post! Ever since I started following you I've made sure to live by the motto, "Whatever scares you, do it." This mindset has inspired me to make the opposite move that you made 20 years ago (New York to California) and I'm looking forward to the adventure.

Hope all is well,

-James

Hey, very inspiring and so very true, it takes courage to move out of comfort zone.

I feel, the whole experience of moving in and out of ones comfort zone
becomes spiritual after a point, since many thing around us makes us
spectator than a active participant of things.

Loved it!!

Hey Derek! It's "kronor" in plural, "krona" in singular. And if you're ever in Sweden again without money you can always swing by my place for a hot meal :)

Derek, i am feeling motivated. Its nice to click any article from you...

P.S: Can you do something with the scrolling bar in the right side of the webpage as it seems the comments are also the part of the whole article and which makes it difficult on the first look to study. I actually scroll down to see the size of the article and then read it :) it would be better if scrolling bar is only for the article.

Holy cow, Derek! :) So great! Love it!

Great Read! Motivating and Inspiring as always.

Hi Derek,

why instead to strive with might and main to be really happy?

Here is the summarized recipe:

http://www.fabricegrinda.com/happiness/happiness-summarized/

A man/woman can push more and more but in the end what it counts is: is he/she really happy?

Or is he/she just a restless man/woman?

All the best!

Fab

PS obviously between you and Fabrice Grinda, you've made something far more meaningful with CDBaby!!

This is like a line from the song "A song for you" "I've been so many places in my life and times". That's what it feels like. Makes me want to pack my bags and go somewhere, maybe take a train from KL Malaysia to Singapore. Just look out of the window and dream. Its so rewarding not just to be in several places but also to be a part of the cultural experiences that have so many variables in different regions. They must draw you closer to humanity and make your unification with the human family all the more knowledgeable. Its the best way to live my friend. You have been gifted with special moments in a very special life.

Amazing....!!
Always motivates me...thanks alot.

A 40m night-dive on your third-ever dive?! And then left alone by your instructor? That's not just "a little reckless"; if anything had happened, it's criminally negligent. A beginner left alone at that depth may have panicked and surfaced too quickly with all the consequences; run out of air and not had his buddy as backup; lost contact with the instructor altogether and surfaced out of sight of the boat, or any other of a number of possible bad outcomes.

Please report the details to PADI or the certifying authority before someone gets seriously hurt or killed. I imagine that if this is the approach this particular instructor or dive center takes to safety there were probably a myriad other smaller issues that may not have been as apparent to a novice, but that could have been equally life threatening.

Not your problem? Maybe, but you'll be morally culpable if (or more likely when) something bad does happen. Please do something, even if this event was some time ago.

Such a timely article, Derek. It made me cry - but a good cry though. Especially ‘cos just last night, I realised I’ve become too comfortable where I currently live. Too long in one place… that you almost forget the type of person you really are, from when you thrived by moving around, enjoying uncertainty, getting into all kinds of havoc.

What keeps me here? Being unable to create samples for a freelance business I want to take on the road with me. Easy peasy samples, too… but so much inner turmoil preventing me… not sure why. It’s nuts! Whereas if I was on the road creating the samples, I’d have no choice - I’d be forced to just do them, right?

Much love. And congrats on the new family!

Derek truly wonderful article...one of your very best...superlative. Surely, different cultural experiences can transform us. .I was also thinking of another "frontier" that many do not explore because it might not feel comfortable or may even be painful....and that is exploring one's mind...through the genius of Sigmund Freud's techniques. Socrates (and I believe him) that the most difficult thing was to understand one's self. Anyway, not bad for a California kid.....you could have been caught forever on a California Beach. You have experienced just about every place but Maine !!

sharing your zone with us as a treat!
Thanks

Congrats on taking your Shaddah and your new baby. I love when people push the boundaries of their life. I am always promoting international trade. I always encourage young people as part of their education to go overseas any where so they have a better perspective on the whole planet.

Would love to hear how the business is going and your take on doing business in the countries mentioned.

Would love to hear more details about these stories. Thanks for sharing, Derek!

Hi Derek, Read your post and it was good. It does make me think that there are a whole lot of people out there living exciting lives & having great adventures to allay their anxieties that they are slipping into a dull, "normal" existence. Must do this, do this, do this. I kind of agree with the guy who settled in Oregon and made his adventure becoming part of the community and taking a step outside his comfort zone to become involved in that. Sometimes it may look like your not doing much when you go to work, provide for your family, keep a roof over their heads, be present in the moment for your children & grandchildren, trying to help others when they need it. Might be difficult to do that while moving off to some other place to convince yourself you are alive. If you're breathing & in motion& alert & striving everyday to do something positive, you are alive. What kind of lives do the average citizens of Singapore have? Or do they dream of the crazy USA when they want to push, push, their comfort zone?

When I'm teaching my Jazz Singer's Workshops and I'm addressing Stage Fright I always tell them how debilitated I was by my own fear and it was true. I would visibly shake, I'd get cotton-mouthed, I'd suffer the runs, cry and sometimes yell at my mother. I stopped singing for many years because my fear was physically too painful.

Now I realize that often the things we're most afraid of are the things that mean the most to us. I now love being on stage and I love sharing my music. I feel completely fulfilled.

Many have told me I am very courageous. My response to them is, if your passionate about it (whatever it is) go for it. Your spirit is thirsty and you if you go for it, you will experience a personal revolution.

All artists should work on expanding their comfort zones. True inspiration comes when you are able to step outside of yourself.

Hi Derek,

Great post! I have been traveling so just got around to it. Sounds like a lot has happen since our breakfast at Food for Thought! I will send you a text when I'm back in SG.

This was a great post. I think I used to be on of the individuals that was afraid of stepping out of their comfort zones. My biggest fear was being embarrassed. Now I realize that getting embarrassed is just a funny story you get to tell your friends in the future.

Hey Derek, I agree with you. Stepping out of comfort zone is always very rewarding. Though it is not something that everyone would initially like to do. Thanks for sending the email.

You are truly inspiring.
I started to read this from Lifehacker and then had to walk over from work to a convenience store all by myself.
I put on some headphones and walked just thinking all over this again and again.
I am in my 20's as well (24 to be precise) and I have never been out of this town but I am engaging in goals and into pushing myself out of this comfort bubble (next year I have to go to japan and I can't contain the excitement each time I think of it).

Thank you for your encouraging words.

What am I afraid of? Everything…
What do I do about that? I figure out ways to move through the fear.
Example: I had a traumatic experience while on holiday. What were my trigger points?
1. I was in an awful situation
2. I could not speak the language. Therefore I could not communicate what had happened.
3. Local people (who no doubt were as kind as any) in the situation could not communicate with me.
Not surprisingly I lost my nerve about travelling.
One of my darling brothers suggested travelling to them. A safe haven that would take me through travelling to a foreign land and having a lovely experience.
Was it challenging, yes! Did it move me through my fear? …. a resounding yes!
Congrats on becoming a Dad Derek and thanks for inspiring me :)

Great article!

It definitely boils down to choosing between living a safe and predictable life, and having a ton of amazing stories like these to share with others.

Derek,
Your positive attitude, success, and profound life inspire me; and your willingness to share and motivate is a bonus. All the very best to you (and your family) always; your personal advice to me has never led me astray. Keep those pearls coming! Thanks for sharing.

“Our doubts are traitor’s, and make us loose the good we oft’ might win, by fearing to attempt.”
Wm. Shakespeare

Derek,
What was your conversion from? Was it to the Muslim Indian faith for marriage ceremony purposes or was it something else? Just curious, if there's no reply I'll understand.

Derek, thanks for sharing. Comfort zones are scary and sad. Life deserves better.
Congratulations on your baby, this new addition to your family will certainly make life interesting and fulfilling. Cheers!

You've covered so much ground! But I can't wait to hear more about your journey through parenthood. Personally, being a parent has pushed me in ways I never imagined possible, internally and externally. Best wishes to you and your family as you embark on unimagined adventures!! (Plenty of discomfort ahead -- hooray!) ;)

Thanks Derek! This is amazing and much appreciated in this chameleon period of time. Push we must, through all these comfort zones. Best of Luck!

our mind is there, to scare us anytime we go beyond our comfort zone, so we might not get hurt, but we also don't get the fun of having new experiences.

Hey a very big congratulations on the birth of your son. If there is one thing that will stretch your comfort zones it's raising children and trying to do it in the best way for their development. The question "when is the last time you did something for the first time?" comes to mind...

Thanks Derek!
I'm moving to Tokyo in October, and I am really scared!!!
Hope it'll be "my" city - my comfort zone in a few years.

You've lived many lives already and I sense you only just started. Thank you Derek for being YOU.

Awesome!

The quality of your posts make the quantity and frequency irrelevant.

Thank you :-)

congratulations derek. don't dig no frog killing (that's the chinese for ya) but thanks for the post. i wish i could say that i am going outside my zone frenquently. but it's too scary and survival in the most mundane sense takes too much away

Wow! That's an incredible life!

After listening to your book Anything You Want, and talking with a friend I've decided to take some baby steps out of my comfort zone and adopt minimalist principles. I've already she'd 100 of 300 books, some clothes and a kitchen table. Maybe I'll shave my head next.
Thanks for sharing what you're up to Derek, it's inspiring!

Great post, Derek. And when you are there, "Act as if". From Conan's documentary:

http://www.hitfix.com/videos/conan-obrien-cant-stop-act-as-if

Truly inspiring! I love forwarding these to all my friends and crediting you as my life mentor. I feel honored just knowing you!!

I just became a grand daddy. Congrats on your new one.
I'm always teaching my 3 Belizean born kids to push push push. Then there is no FEAR! False Evidence Appearing Real.
Thanks for being what I am. It's a great ride!
- Skinny

I have re-invented myself several times, making life interesting but ruffling a few feathers along the path I chose. Only one regret was not learning time management sooner, but later has proven better than never. You are blessed my friend. Continue on your journey. We await your words.

I agree that people should always step out from their comfort zones. You never know how capable you are unless you put your hands on it. By the way, I would love to speak some singlish with you, ok ma?

Derek...Congrats on your son!!!
What is his name?
This would be a great guest post on Ishita's Fear.less blog! I often repeat Joseph Campbell's quote, "The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek" again & again until I do that thing that really scares or intimidates me.
You rock. Enjoy this precious time~baby gazing is soothing to the soul!

What scares me now? Next week I will be pitching an investor who could fund the biggest entrepreneurial venture of my life so far. Sitting down at a table with someone who has the ability to launch my business dream (if I can show them it's a great idea) is a bit scary, but exciting too. I think most entrepreneurs thrive on doing things that scare them, and pull them out of their comfort zones. Growing is more often then not, terrifying.

Totally inspiring Derek, I love reading your posts. Thanks for sharing.

Assalamu alaikum...
When the conference date you speak in Indonesia?
I miss it...
Where I can get the information of your next conferences?

Dear Derek,
I knew when I stumbled upon you on the internet that you were very special, inspiring and unique. My warmest wishes of love and greetings to you and your lovely wife and new baby!

Congrats on the baby boy Derek. You're definitely an inspiration to many.

As a musician, I feel most alive when I'm nervous. When I'm trying something out of my comfort zone, like an acoustic solo gig, singing R&B tunes, or performing new original music.

Once you finish the experience, it's conquered and can never bother you again. "Go big or go home" - I tell myself to psyche myself up.

The satisfaction and relief you feel when you successfully accomplish something outside of your comfort zone is tremendously rewarding and a great confidence booster.

All the best Derek and best of luck with your new life,
Dan Jost

Derek:

OK and WOW! I also recently read your book - Anything You Want. Thank you for reminding us that things of lasting value are often simple, non-materialistic, and are related to doing our best for others. Your approach just rings true.

Keep up the great work.

Derek, you're a dad! Mazel tov!

Derek, this is a great post that hits home. For the past four years I have been confronting "a fear a year". Taking as long of that year to do something that scares the shit out of me. And you're right, there's so much wonderful freedom in not being restricted, not avoiding what you used to be scared of. And it feels great to know that you CAN do it. And once you've done it a couple times it gets easier & the fear dissipates more quickly when you approach new challenges. Thanks for this wonderful reminder.
-=Charlie

Hey Derek,

Europe + Asia = "Eurasia"; therefore, making the people "Eurasian".

Out of the 7 continents, these are the two continents that are not divided by vast bodies of water like an ocean or something -basically, these land masses are conected.

It seems to be an attempt by someone, or some group, to link up with the magnitude of the other's continent. I guess there is believed to be a benefit in that for one or the other continent. Maybe it increases their world superpower status?
-E

Derek,
I'm sure it was meant to, but while reading that, I was trying to find the angle. I'm books and short stories, authors like to create confusing situations that they reveal later. I was only confused because I ignored the obvious and thought you were telling many peoples stories. Then I realized, that's just one person's life. I'm amazed at your drive.
I love reading for blogs because I feel like you think the way I do, but to a whole other level. I think about how to trick myself into an awesome life, and your writings make me say to myself, "How would Derek look at the situation." It's a mental trick, but I think tricks have there place. I hope to have a story worth writing about soon as well.

Yay PapaD huge congrats what a lucky baby to be born into a family of love.
I love scaring myself now that I understand it makes my life richer.
Hugs across the wires :)

"Chaos should be considered extremely good news." - Chogyam Trungpa

we can all be "experience connoisseurs"... life offers us all up the chance to cook up life by a recipe of our own original design.

I was thinking just this morning what was I afraid of when I started my record label. I though it would get so big I would not know how to deal with it. I almost stop during the beginning process. I was so afraid. Well the business did not get so big that I could not handle it. Matter a fact its been a lot more work since I moved and got a part time job. Afraid I am not because I want to stop this part time job that takes time and energy from my music. It's my own fault that I did not continue working music full time when I moved. I was afraid because this area is a different animal. That's what I thought and I let fear inside me. I was just WRONG and AFRAID. Serve me right (smile) Have a nice day everyone and thanks Derek.

Hello Derek,

I'd like to thank you for responding to all my emails over the years and as you know I've referenced you to just about everyone who is looking to get out of their comfort zone and make a difference by giving their Gifts to the World.
You are a constant reminder of something that was whispered to me many years ago by God Herself :
"Everything You Desire is in the Unknown"

Its all arbitrary! "Difficult" and "Stress" is the same darn thing. Awesome - can't wait to visit Asia one day.

Derek sets his bar very high, and doing so, he allows everyone else permission to do the same! Keep up with the great work! Thank you!! Ferdinando :-)

Hello Derek,

I think it's great that you've done all this, and been around the world to see how others live, and so on, man. There's no doubt that many of us just don't push thru our fears enough. I used to be scared to death to speak in a small group, and now I can speak with 50 people in a room with relative ease. So many fears are so unfounded, and truly silly once we get to the other side as you've done. Even though the fear is silly it doesn't mean you as a whole person are silly. Big distinctive in overcoming fear in my opinion. Fear is really the aching fear of hate in many ways. Exposure galore is the key, but it doesn't work for everyone sadly. I admire you for always challenging yourself, but don't forget the most important thing to enjoy the journey of life. Paradoxically being free of fears is one of the best ways to enjoying life as long as it's done in moderation in my view. Have fun, and congratulations on your new baby, Derek. Best wishes! Clay Wilson

Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitri Derek...
Alloh SWT bless you :-)

Derek, this is awesome, thanks.

Best wishes,

Duane

I read this article on Lifehacker which led me to buying your book. I think that's pretty awesome that you've done all those things. I'm slowly achieving all the great things I have set for myself. I never understood why people would settle for just living a boring life. Ever since I was 19 I've spent every single birthday in a new city, sometimes in a new city overseas. I've had some really crazy jobs and done some things that most people wouldn't do. Albeit they're not at your level, but reading stories about people who do things like you just makes me want to get up and do something even more amazing. thanks for sharing your stories, I really love reading them. Gives me inspiration to chase my own big dreams.

its gonna take a bulldozer to move me out of my comfort zone, it is imminent, very very imminent.

Congratulations, extend my greetings to the new member of your family.

I think you are cool! Very inspiring. Thank you for sharing x

Thanks for sharing ! But when are you going more and more "vertical"? means spiritual ???? xx

Hi Derek,
Born to be inspirational.
ps Thanks for the Tim info. also got 4Hbody book.
Avril Bonner xx

Hi Derek,
Excellent sharing. Thanks.

Derek,
Great
Your Back
Thank You
So Much !
Carey

Wow. Been a big fan of yours ever since I've read "Anything you want". Congratulations on being a father!

My wife and I are from Singapore and we are currently "Pushing" too. We're travelling for through South America for now. Eventually, we want to startup a business once we return to Singapore.

Just want to say that your book has been a HUGE inspiration and our decision to do what we are doing now is partly influenced by what you've wrote.

Cheers,
TW

Just one of them days - no job - -mortgage in foreclosure, gigs slow, car broke.
Question- why don't we sell all of this stuff and leave -- leave and go where? When I get there I know.

Just one of them days
If a storm comes and it's all blows away - what would you do?.

Just one of them days
So the love of your life has someone else - what would you do?
A Dream is like anything else - sometimes we have to let it go for it to be forefilled.
Just One Of Them Days

What an awesome post Derek. I just loved it. It is a definite re-read and a share. Now to get though the comments section! That will take awhile..... Best regards, Lynn

Holy Crap Derek I think you just blew the top off my head. Simply amazing and seriously humbling.

Congrats on becoming a dad! That's been my big adventure (two actually) so far and I hope yours is just as challenging and incredibly rewarding as mine has been. I know that I have felt more lost and helpless and out of my depth trying to be a good father than I ever did wandering around in Europe or Japan.

Keep up the awesome work man. Glad to hear you are doing so well.

Derek, you are UNBELIEVABLE!!! You live a life that most of us do not even have the capacity to dream about. Thanks for being so inspiring, I LOVE reading your posts.

I bought you book, read it quickly, and now have shared it with 3 other family members. They have enjoyed reading it also.

Derek...I'm looking for the poem..push push push...expanding your comofort zone. that was so good..
In my speeches.. I speak on Get up...
off the couch, etc.
GetOUT....of your comfort zone... etc.
"fear of failure" is the one thing that keeps most people from trying something new.. etc.etc. the poem you posted is so excellent for this... but couldn't find it.. will look again.. thanks..
oh.... Get up... Get out....
and Get your MOVE ON! well, you can imagine! my speakers website will be live soon.. I'll let you know.

I always tell people to push the envelope, no matter how microscopic that envelope may be.

For some just the thought of making a phone call or returning something to a store evokes sheer terror, which is a clear sign it's a mountain to be scaled.

And once they stand at their own personal summit, it's time for celebration, cheer and congratulations. And in these small steps ever greater mountains are scaled, until one day the person who was afraid of the tiniest things is boarding a rocket to the moon.

What an inspiration this post was... thanks :)

Enigmatic, Magnetic, Truthful. Thanks for this wonderful article. Have a great weekend.

Thanks,
Adil

well written-----------------------------Thanks

Congratulation to joining the parenthood

Nice to read your article, and realized I have mostly stayed in my comfort zone and only pushed to minimum required extent which can make me survive.
And I have avoided lot of things that make me nervous, scare me and feel intimidating .
I will make a list of these and work on each one to come out of comfort zone to be more confident in life.
Thanks for sharing, looking forward for a lot of more inputs

Exquisite. I love it, thank you for posting this!
I've lived in 5 countries and traveled to 50. As a Eurasian California girl you've inspired me to push push push onto the next amazing and fearless frontier....uRockDerek!

Wonderful post, really inspiring. And obviously extremely true. Pushing through our comfort zone is the only way to enlarge it to have more things inside and let fear outside. Like when learning to drive a car, the first times more or less totally scaring and later, through pushing, it becomes second nature. The more we do new things the less we're concerned about change or something new. And after a while it becomes a permanent attitude.

Obviously it should be reasoned pushing.

Thanks for such an ispiring example.

This is a very well thought out post. Thank you for sharing. It's so important to know yourself as you begin to "push, push, push." What are you capable of? What makes you tick?

You can literally redefine your abilities.

So many amazing stories Derek! It's always refreshing to read about your experiences and views. We definitely need more people like you in politics 😊
I can only imagine where you will be in 10 years from now, and what additional value you will bring to the world. Congratulations on all the achievements, especially your new Son!
Best
Paul

We all have a choice about what we do and mostly when we do what we choose. I know my God lives, I trust Him and hope that I can do all that He has for me to do. That does not scare me. I don't know of anything that I'm affaid of. I know there are things that could hurt me, but when I get an appropriate feeling or nudge from the Holy Spirit I try to do what I understand that I'm supposed to do. Fear is one of those things that the Bible gives us instruction about which is "not to fear anything but God".

Ha, Staten Island! I grew up there, now in Toronto, miss the Pizza and Italian Ices....not so much the scenery!

Congrats to you, most people will go there whole lives and not even think about the places you've been to. Makes you appreciate what you have when you see the rest of the world.

Woah, absolutely LOVE THIS! As I read through it so many memories of my first travelling experience - when I went backpacking for 5 months in 2008 - came flooding back. I remember how intimidated I was to go travelling for the first time (it was my first time out of North America) and how I delayed it for 6 months for silly reasons. I always knew I wanted to go and I had the sinking 'afraid/excited' feeling in my gut which was reinforcing the fact that I just had to take the leap, so I did. After realizing how easy and fun it was to get out of your own world, experience others, and meet some amazing people from around the world, travelling just became apart of my lifestyle and I.love.it! As I think back now to how I put it off and the reasons why, I remember a lesson that has stayed with me to this day that I now apply to many things: There will ALWAYS be a reason not to do something (mostly created by ourselves to justify not taking the plunge, lol) and there is no 'perfect' time. If you wait for the right reason or the right time you will never move; the right time is now and the reason is because you can :)
Thanks for sharing this incredible story.

Please if possible at some point in the future, a post about living in Singapore. Your perspective is most valuable for people of similar cultural background that consider moving there :-)

Thanks Derek, Your words are always inspiring. I'm thinking of working in Singapore as an anesthetist because I believe SG would be the business center in Asia in the near future. I'm working for TOEFL test required for working as a physician in that country. At the same time I always feel frightened thinking about my life in SG far miles away from my family, and life as a foreigner. However, you're right, I think I have to push, push, push to expand my comfort zone.

Dear Derek you are always inspiring. If you have chance read "A Fortune-Teller Told Me: Earth-bound Travels in the Far East " by Tiziano Terzani. You have something in common. I bet it :)

Derek:

Congratulations on the new baby. He's born into a world where he'll never know there wasn't an Internet (and who knows, maybe by the time he's reached awareness, something else will be the next cool thing). Very happy to hear of your success and your good life. May wonderful things continue to bless you and your family.

Thanks special angel for another awesome adventure to inspire us all! I am deeeeelighted, to wish you congratulations on becoming a parent! I cannot wait for the "life lessons my child teaches me" articles you might bless us with in the future!!! It feels good to say "hello baby"to yours, as that was the title of my first CD that you personally talked me through uploading onto your (then very young) CDBaby venture! Through the years you have continued to inspire with your sensibilities, adventures and insights and how cool that in so doing, you have facilitated the emergence of this growing community here - people connected who can share what is truly important, mindful, meaningful and helpful. Your child is blessed with an incredible role model in you, and no doubt the wife you chose. YAY!

What scares me is not trying, more than anything. I saw that on Y Combinator lately and it shook me a little - the people who die with regrets are those who didn't try. However, the second thought - do those that try end up with more regrets because they have more potential points of failure after the fact? It seems like a bigger node, but it opens you up to more nodes. I just quit my job to do just that, so it's something that rattles me a little..

Very inspiring, as always, thanks Derek. I'm about to speak at a conference, in English, English is my second language, and I don't remember the lines... Gee, I'm not so sacred after reading this.

Hello friend! Outstanding as always! Keep doing what you do! God bless u!

Great article. I'm planning on becoming a public speaker and that is a BIG step outside of my comfort zone. Thanks for the inspiring article.

Great article. I don't think we can ever progress or grow unless we really push ourselves past our comfort zone, the biggest risks in life, love and career can also be the most rewarding.

Derek,

You are my hero in a million ways. I sit in my little house in NJ...looking for a job everyday, and about to be homeless. I have done everything I thought I was supposed to do to have a stable life (college, government job, long marriage, homeowner, community volunteer, etc)...but my life is anything but stable.

I wish I had been brave enough to be like you...and to really live my life! However, I do want to contribute to the world before I leave it...and have created several discussion groups on Linked In to help facilitate policy discussions between workforce development and economic development professionals...with the goal of getting them to support small business development.

My passion is to help people (like myself), who are hurting in this economy.

There are only 3.5 million jobs available in the US right now and 13 million people on unemployment ...with at least another 10 million people who have exhausted their unemployment claims and still cannot find work. (There are only about 133 million wage earners in the US...so there is a HUGE proportion of the country out of work...much more than the media (and Department of Labor) reports.

The workforce development system (Department of Labor) does not support teaching entrepreneurship...and for many years people have been told that it takes a special kind of person to be an entrepreneur to dissuade people from starting businesses and keep them in the labor pool (keep them as employees). Of course the truth is that anyone can be an entrepreneur with the right passion, right vision, etc...and as more and more people become desperate to find work it is imperative that meaningful support is provided to help people start businesses...because "JOBS" are not going to come back (due largely to technology).

We must create a lot of new businesses to again create a labor demand. That is why Obama and Romney talk about "job creation" now...not "training and education."

I started a linked In group two weeks ago called "creating a system of support for entrepreneurs and small business." (bit.ly/systemofsupport). The group has more than 200 members already and the membership includes the President of Babson College (voted the #1 college in the US for entrepreneurship for the last 19 years in a row!) as well as many members of the International Economic Development Council (IEDC), many high ranking workforce development professionals, economists, and many entrepreneurs and small business people etc.

So you see, I am trying to fix some of the economy's problems through connecting with policymakers and facilitating discussions with those who can help make a difference...

I have an idea for a tv show could really help America start thinking about creating businesses...and that is the thinking we need now in the US to create jobs. This show would be WILDLY popular! And, it is only in the last year that it has become possible to do this! I don't have the money to patent the idea...

It is perfect for Mark Burnett, but I don't know how to get to him.

I just want to tell him and trust he would do the right thing (pay me for the idea if he uses it).

So how do I get the idea in front of him? Or, if I tell you...can you help?

Thanks for any help you can give!

I'm totally blown away by the things you do.

I wish I could just let loose like you do. There was time when I was more apt to do that, but once I got married and starting raising my kids, I lost the ability to live that way. There is a deep stirring inside my wife and one of my kids that is still at home. We're so restless, so wanting a change, but we don't know how to do it.

I'm so busy being busy that I've just forgotten how to move out of this box I'm in. To make matters worse, the things that I'm busy doing are things that I hate.

I guess I need a first step, a kind of baby step for stepping out of my comfort zone. I'll let you know how I'm progressing.

Tim

Wow Derek! THAT's AMAZING!

We do have two things in common though, I also have a son AND I've gotten myself lost . . . on a bike in Stockholm Sweden no less! Loved both experiences I can tell you!

And that's the thing, when we push ourselves out of our comfort zone, we begin to experience the lives of others, thus making us all have more and more things in common. So yeah, push, push, push actually brings us together on several levels!

it is the key to control your fears and live free

Incredible article. Just reading it has expanded my mind. Sometimes life just get's the better of you and you impose your own limitations on yourself. It takes reading something like your experience to make you realise what you're doing.

Thanks for the read.

That's a great article Derek. Really is a true story as well as one cannot progress in life without breaking out of their comfort zone.

Pretty much my entire life has been a risk and it wouldn't have been half as much of a ride so far if it wasn't.

Keep up the good work, and keep pushing that comfort zone.

Great!!!

I couldn't agree more with this. I too share things I tend to do probably in order to get approval and motivation.

Nice article Derek, totally agree with you on the importance of pushing out from a comfort zone, even though it can be difficult to do sometimes. The easiest option will often not be the best way forward.

This is so inspiring. The fear of the unknown holds us back but what an adventure it would be if v explore so much that lies around us

Love it! Overcoming those comfort zone boundaries will be the difference between failure and success!

I was surprized that you have not ever heard of the word Eurasian, but I suppose that as an American - you need not have done. The Singaporians are categorising you as a European, should it not be Amasian, or Amerasian or something similar. Too like Caucasian. Just playing with words and having fun.

That was sweet.

I'm doing this thing to get me out of my comfort zone. I'm terrified.

http://www.garyjbowles.com/blog/shipping-protocol/

Derek, thank you so much for inspiring me. I certainly am going to fight my way to where the magic happens, and this year is the year for me

What a great lesson, keeping push your comfort zone. This is a common thread that most people avoid. Getting out of ones' comfort zone sucks! But once you realize what you learn when you're out of your comfort zone you begin to seek out those moment.
Cheers my friend,

Ash

Hi Derek,
My mom said to me over the phone "So I guess you're homeless." I said "yep, I'm homeless." The condo sold. I've given away most of my furniture. I'm in the final days of sorting and tossing files, books, cds ... etc. I keep thinking of how you gave away Everything in preparation for your adventure to Singapore - and it inspires me to keep winnowing.
Next Saturday I get on a plane to leave Nashville after 30 years for northern California to begin my new adventure. First on the agenda is a 12 date April tour of "Romancing the West" a musical and visual history of 200 years of the development of California and Oregon. I co-wrote theme song. Woodstock icon, Melanie (I Got a Brand New Pair of Roller Skates) is also on the tour also. After the tour? I have No Idea. Ok - so it's not crossing an ocean or having to learn a new language, but still, I'm pushing expanding my boundaries and pushing through fear. Thanks for being a great role model!

Haha, nicely presented. And something I can relate to. Came by this by way of an Aaron Swartz article. I'm a writer (and now) performer based in Bangkok. I do slam poetry. Which doesn't really exist here, but that hasn't stopped me and has also given me a great opportunity to work thru my own stage fright/gain experience points. But yeah, I already notice the change in me, how things that are normal to me are still a big deal (unimaginable) to other people. And you kinda need their perspective to remember the perspective you used to have, to appreciate how far you've come. But yeah, here's to bigger stages. Cheers.

i wanna leave my comfort zone as well but the thing is, i think it is quite difficult you know. i'm glad you can do that!
regards. btw the which one is you from the pic above?
eddy

Wow! HOLY FREAKING WOW! That's all I can say about this. I was reading it and my heart was pounding in my ears. Awesome! So freaking awesome! I'm a big fan of pushing outside of my comfort zone as often as possible, and even just reading this did that. Thank you for sharing this! And I can't wait to hear more! roulette methods

Great to hear about what you're up to Derek. I've been missing your updates ! You've sure had a busy time in the last months... stay in touch, all the best !
Caelen

Keep on keeping on!!! Derek. I'm looking forward to meeting you next time you are in Cambodia or our paths cross elsewhere.

Pursuing my interest in electronic music, even though I'm "too old" at 31.

Don't look it though.

I really like this post and the sentiment.
You can push yourself hard in so many spheres of life, not just physical...

This reminds me of the old miles Davis quote, "you know why I quit playing ballads? Cause I love playing ballads." Great article.
Ooooh! Love it! Never heard that one. Thank you! ☺ — Derek

That was great, Derek. I love the photo too. Vocal coach Felicia Farerre is currently working with me to get used to speaking all the time with a 'yawning' feeling. It's one of the most uncomfortable things I've ever done after nearly 45 years of limiting my voice with various emotional/physical patterns!

I love that you've pushed yourself culturally as well as other ways!

Great post! Some very creative ways to push your comfort zone. I love it!

Derek,
I talk about you all the time to my friends.
I am finding that I am repeating all the great advice you have shared.
I love pushing my comfort zone.
It's addicting.
It's fantastic. cork and bottle

Good works. I read carefully your post and find out it's wonderful.
----
Shara @ http://thejobsfor14yearolds.com

I have always been making myself comfortable.

Wow Derek, you never cease to amaze me. You don't post as much as you used to, but when you do, you are definitely still as brilliant as you ever were.

Just curious, how did you get the gig on the diplomatic side?

I have to say I'm impressed. It almost sounds like a Hollywood movie. You must have really stepped outside of your comfort zone in a cultural way. Here check this out! It relates to comfort zone. Tell me what you think about it. http://sam777777.hubpages.com/hub/How-do-we-expand-our-comfort-zone-Here-find-out.

Thanks for a nice post and a motivating one to make us step out of what is holding us back to succeed in life.

I am employed but there are things I think I got to but my work is holding me back so am planning to try new things and i think this will help me to my life to the fullest.

Hello Derek and others,
It starts with being willing...

For me, comfort feels natural and normal and right. I would call myself insecure. I am willing to be excited, but not willing to feel cold knives in my entrails.

Last month, alone in a foreign city, I shamelessly wore a child's compass around my neck, and only consulted my map at intervals—I wouldn't have wanted a companion insisting I stay fully oriented at all times. Besides, you stumble on neat stuff when you are not intent on staying precise.

I am willing to push, in another culture, craft or hobby, but only when I am alone, not when anyone can judge me or want me to hurry.

Hence, like in another of your essays, I seldom announce my plans, but tell people after the accomplishment has happened.

That nice read(felt in my heart) .every human having different comfort zone but your perspective of comfort zone is really nice but it happen only some people in current world because the people are scare to put their foot in different areas...http://www.juegosdefriv2021.com/

So funny to see your face amongst a bunch of Chinese at a government-ish meeting😆
I’m happiest when out of place. — Derek

Sometimes, you put on a hat, and this hat makes you what you are going to be next.
When I was 27, I was sent to the Philippines, to help establish a service-center, but was surprisingly appointed as the CEO on the week of my arrival. I was 27, with no practical experience and just some good grades and a relevant BA behind me. Felt awkward and undeserving - build (quite from scratch) and manage a full scale operation of hundreds of people, where none was recruited or trained by then, in a different country, continent, where the local culture cannot be further apart from what I was used to.
It worked though, better than anyone's expectations.
I think it doesn't matter if you're a musician from California, or a writer from New Zealand - the hat that you wear at the moment has a lot of power in making you the right man for the job against all odds.

Do you keep in touch with anyone in that room, Derek?
No. — Derek