I found out yesterday that Carolyn (my former mother in law) has stomach cancer, and has been in the hospital for about a week. I'm kind of in shock. Not nearly as much as she and the rest of the Loveridges are, I'm sure, but it still seems unbelievable. When I saw them in May she seemed so perky, and Arnold seemed more tired.
Anyway...you can read about it here in Arnold's blog, which I've been meaning to put a link to anyway:
http://too-old-to-know-better.blogspot.com/
My Aunt Layle and Grandma both had their bouts with cancer, and my two maternal granparents as well. All of that was so long ago, though, that it doesn't seem real this time, I guess. Please pray for her.
I'm trying to decide if I want to go more "public" with my blog, as in actually telling people I have one, lol. I know lots of people don't mind making theirs more public, but I'm still on the fence about it. Now that I'm blogging for Laurie, maybe I'll just make a blogspot version. But do I really want to have to worry about two blogs, on top of starting a general blog about family history? Eh, something for me to think about and decide sooner rather than later.
To protect the name of the friend in question, I'll call them "friend." There 'ya go.
Huntington Beach is officially "Surf City." They even made it legal by "copyrighting it" somehow. The official way it's recognized escapes me....but the reason for it seems fairly obvious if you're familiar with the city: fairly large population, long stretch of a wide, beautiful beach, among other things.
Yesterday M.E. came in and announced that she'd been out for a walk up by the U.S. Open. The first thing that popped into my mind was golf, and the second sand volleyball. (Is there a competition for beach volleyball called the US Open? I wouldn't know. Anyway.) So I didn't manage to hide the fact that I didn't know it was the surfing competition.
Today, "Friend" comes by. He's never been to my new place before. We talk about the difficulty parking here this weekend. He asks, "where is the U.S. Open from here?"
"Want me to show you?" (It's not hard to see the pier from here. short walk.)
"Oh, is it close?"
"Yeah, just by the pier..."
(pause. silence.)
(puzzled) "Is there somewhere to golf near the pier?"
I felt much better about myself. :) I'd better let "Friend" know I put this in my blog.
Next story:
My car is gone. Maybe for good. We'll see soon enough....
found out after trip to the Mormon History Conference in Sacramento that my car needs a new transmission and timing belt and repairs to the engine, all totalling over $3,000. I've been waffling for over a month over what to do about it, and it looks like I'm going to settle with living without a car, and occasionally borrowing my brother in law's car. They seem to be okay with that. We've done a test run of sorts these past six weeks, and so far so good. I'm getting better at working and entertaining myself from home, so there's the side benefit to the whole thing, I guess. I just don't have $3,000, so it's not a priority. There are worse things I could lose than my car, and I've sort of been preparing for this possibility for the last three or four years anyway. It's just kind of ironic that it was the '99 Honda that ended up needing bigger repairs than the '89 Honda did. (May she rest in peace.) I wasn't tempted to take a photo this time, though, with my kids sitting on the trunk and "RIP" painted on the back. That '89 was a good car.
- Current Mood:
grateful
| Your Five Factor Personality Profile |
You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have high conscientiousness. Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life. Most things in your life are organized and planned well. But you borderline on being a total perfectionist. Agreeableness: You have high agreeableness. You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly. Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone. You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance. Neuroticism: You have low neuroticism. You are very emotionally stable and mentally together. Only the greatest setbacks upset you, and you bounce back quickly. Overall, you are typically calm and relaxed - making others feel secure. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything. |
Ahahahahahahahahah!!!! (pardon me while I laugh a bit neurotically...sort of.) ;-)
I think it is mostly (mostly...sort of) accurate. Especially the "medium-extrovert" stuff. And the part about my being "highly agreeable" and valuing harmony, but yet a perfectionist. Erm, kind of a big perfectionist at times. Especially with myself.
What makes me laugh a bit is the part about only the "greatest setbacks" upsetting me. It's kind of true. I'm not sure how I'd explain this one along with my anxiety issues...it would be interesting to ask some of my friends whom I know have known me for a long time, though. I tend to just go along with the flow with a lot of things, very true. And certain things that bother most people fly by me like they're no big deal. I'm not usually easily intimidated...by individuals.
I keep getting told that a lot of my anxiety issues are related to life experiences. It does seem to be the case. So I'd like to believe that once I have some of the complicated issues I'm currently facing under control, that those anxieties will be lessened...and maybe, mostly, the physical health issues (they're sort of like two interconnected things...but I can't seem to just make one stop by "just stopping" the other without the help of doctors...)
okay, so that seems to be the crux of the whole thing. Much of it, most of it, etc. So anyway. How that connects to this I'm not sure, but it still made me laugh. Because we all need to laugh, so we don't cry. ;-) Really, I don't have any huge reasons to cry. Many, many blessings in my life right now....been through that one before, but anyway. Guess I'll put this after the blogthing so I don't risk boring anyone to death first thing. ;-)
from http://www.blogthings.com/thefivefactorpersonalitytest/
- Current Mood:
amused
Libby and I stopped by the beach and pier on the way back home (to her dad and Staci's place.) It was windy, but the weather was nice and there were tons of people visiting the beach for the weekend. We saw something I've never noticed before when we passed by the rental shack...did you know they have special wheel chairs for the beach? They have very wide wheels to make it easier to push over the sand without sinking in. We then went for a walk to the end of the pier. As usual, there were quite a few surfers to watch. We saw one in particular wipe out and lose his bright pink board. The board then made the trip by wave back into the beach, while the surfer swam around wondering where it was.
I think one of the highlights of the day was when Libby said, "wouldn't it be fun to ride a wheel chair on a surf board?"
As usual, the kids had an assortment of cards and other things that they made for me at school and in primary at church. I'm going to have to post what they put in some little books they made on Sunday. I'm not sure where the primary leaders in their dad's ward came up with it, but their idea for a mother's day project from the kids was simple but adorable. I'll have to make it another post, though.
I have about three appointments to make and other errands to run. I need to finish preparations for a history conference I'm going to over Memorial Day weekend. I'm a little nervous about it, but I'll say why later. :-)
I'm not intentionally being cryptic. Just a bit muddle-brained, but I didn't want to forget to at least post something.
Happy belated Mother's Day. :-)
- Current Mood: grateful
1. What was I doing 10 years ago?
- I was a stay at home mom. Perry was about nine months old, and we lived in grad student family housing for UC Berkeley in Albany, in the Bay Area of Northern CA. Our Relief Society had the best book club. Ever. I'm still hoping that someday I'll come across a list of the books we read and were planning to read...
(We were normal. Really. There are normal people in Berkeley.) ;o) Quite a few, in fact.
"The Village, " UC Berkeley student family housing: originally built as military housing
2. What are 5 things on my to do list?
-go to Libby's dentist appointment
-find something fun (and inexpensive) to do with Perry this week
-finish some e-mails for the Mormon History Conference coming up next month in Sacramento, CA
-take some things in my car to D.I. or Goodwill
-go for a bike ride
3. What are some snacks I enjoy?
Rice Chips, snap peas, carrot sticks, popcorn, chocolate, pepperoni (not all together obviously), fruit
4. What would I do if I became a billionaire?
-buy my sister a house
-make sure my step mom has a place to retire so that she doesn't hate me for the rest of her life for having been sick
-something good. somewhere. Save the Children? Perpetual Education Fund? Adopt a lot of children just after getting a whole bunch of energy?
5. What are 3 bad habits I have?
-I worry.
-When I worry, I sometimes forget to eat.
-I can't count to three.
-I fuss over my kids even when they're not with me.
-If I'm tired and you ask me a serious question, I may ramble. A lot. Trying to answer it. It's better to just give up and ask me in the morning. Or to be patient, and try to abbreviate it yourself. When I'm done. Otherwise you might throw me off, and I'll forget what I was saying...and what you asked me. This can easily be a nightly occurrence.
-I think I have to say hello to everyone, and I try to remember their names. Poorly.
-When I'm into a book, a parade could pass by and I might not notice.
6. Where are 6 places I have lived?
Placentia, CA
Durham, NH
Rexburg, ID
Jacob Lake, AZ
Carcassonne, France
Berkeley, CA
Los Angeles, CA
7. What are 5 jobs I've had?
-manager of the hosiery dept. at Sears
Shoe sales at Sears (2 years, first job, while in high school)
-Physical Geography tutor, Ricks College
-Store clerk and waitress at the Grand Canyon, North Rim
-French and science tutor, Albany Middle School
-Banana Republic on 3rd Street in Santa Monica
8. What are 5 things people don't know about me?
-I love snow, but I have to admit that it might be because I've only spent a few winters in it.
-Until about the age of 20, I was still determined to join the Air Force someday and become a pilot.
-I got to fly a plane over the house I grew up in. (A good friend had just gotten his pilot's license.)
-I've been ward or stake choir director five times, and got to conduct the touring choir in college during "Mother's Week." (For our mothers. I wasn't a mother yet. Or married.)
-I sang at a Catholic wedding at a cathedral in France while wearing an LDS missionary name tag. (The priest was nice to us, by the way...) ;)
Sometimes when things get especially hairy, and I feel like I've been pushed into a corner, I get scared. All very normal.
All this weekend while running around doing things I wasn't sure I'd be able to do, things kept working....
even though some of my health issues were still there, keeping me humble. (heh...hopefully.)
And I have a bunch of cassette tapes in my car that I bought in the 80's and 90's. One of them, which I seem to feel the need to play over and over again every few months, is one by Michael W. Smith.
I'm wondering how strange this may seem... (though it probably won't stop me from doing it, because it seems harmless enough...)
This song seems to echo so much how I feel when being pulled around another corner or helped through another window when it seems that a thousand doors have been closed, only to find that what's on the other side of the trial is better than I could have planned for myself.
So I listen to it. Over and over again. I think I must have played it 9 or 10 times the other night while driving home from getting to see friends in L.A. My visit had been brief, but healing. Not that I don't like it here in my new place... I'm learning every day why moving here was a good idea. But the blessing of having "old" friends still somewhat close by means I drive up there about two or three times a month.
And getting to watch Libby sing this weekend while helping out with the children's choirs for OCMCO. I was sooooo tired. And slightly afraid to drive home. But I think it was worth it. I'll know better next time how to better prepare.... but it was good for me, to see what my limits are, I guess. And I think the kids had a good time.
So, the lyrics:
Providence, Providence
See it laying down the cornerstone
The Hand of Providence - it's evident
For we could never make it on our own
Apportioning the power
Weighing all that it entails
Giving us the fulcrum
And a balance to the scales
Chorus:
Oh, the Hand of Providence
Is guiding us through choices that we make
Oh, the Hand of Providence
Is reaching out to help us on our way
Providence, ever since
Any thesis ever entered man
The Hand of Providence
Has been our best defense
Tho' his ways are sometimes hard to understand
From the dying of a heartbeat
To another soul reborn
From in between and circling
Our thoughts of love and war
Chorus
Oh, the Hand of Providence
Is guiding us through choices that we make
Oh, the Hand of Providence
Is reaching out to help us on our way
This song goes through my mind like a roller coaster, or a massage. (How those two things relate, I'm not sure...but that's what comes to mind.) ;-) From years of singing in choirs etc, there are many many songs that elicit emotional reactions in me...but just a few that stick. And seem to come back. Over and over. This one seems to have joined Redeemer of Israel in a special spot reserved for, "somehow can listen to...and seems to need to listen to...over and over again, repeatedly, in my mind." Kind of like a mantra, I suppose....or words that speak to my fears...the ones I struggle with the most and can't seem to get past as quickly as I'd like... and yet these songs come like a healing balm. A soothing roller coaster, I guess you could say. Maybe like having a nice nap on a train or a boat on gentle waters.
Whomever wrote these lyrics was inspired in one way or another: they echo in my mind as a reminder of the atonement. Perhaps it's cheesy to have somewhat Isaiah-like lyrics in a Christian pop song setting. But the cheerful tune, and even not to mention the harmonica...for some reason that made this song, or gave it that extra small oomph that made it just perfect...like a cherry on top or a beautiful breeze on a blue-sky day.
Um, repeated. (the lyrics that remind me of Easter...or whatever it is that I'm forgetting when things can get frightening. )
Apportioning the power
Weighing all that it entails
Giving us the fulcrum
And a balance to the scales
Life can be hard, but I have much to be grateful for.
-Happy Easter-
- Current Mood: grateful
Appropriate in a non-political way, the day after elections. (Bending the meaning of "wordless wednesday." Obviously I'm not truly "wordless" today.)
Michelle Obama Visits LDS Church HQ
SALT LAKE CITY4 February 2008 Mrs. Michelle Obama met with two apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints today shortly after a campaign stop in Salt Lake City on behalf of her husband, Senator Barack Obama.Mrs. Obama met with Elder M. Russell Ballard and Elder Quentin L. Cook, of the Twelve Apostles.
Although the Church is neutral in party politics, it is common for political and government leaders to pay brief calls on Church leadership. The half-hour meeting focused mostly on family values.
"Developing Christlike attributes in our lives is not an easy task,
especially when we move away from generalities and abstractions and begin
to deal with real life. The test comes in practicing what we proclaim. The
reality check comes when Christlike attributes need to become visible in
our lives--as husband or wife, as father or mother, as son or
daughter, in our friendships, in our employment, in our business, and in
our recreation. We can recognize our growth, as can those around us, as we
gradually increase our capacity to 'act in all holiness before
[Him]' (D&C 43:9)."
Topics: personal growth, trials,
choices, attributes of Christ
(Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "Christlike Attributes--the Wind beneath Our Wings," Ensign, Nov. 2005, 102)
- Current Mood:
sleepy
So it's been a really, really long time since I've updated. Life has been almost too eventful to know quite what to post. I've had so many changes happening without really knowing what they meant, so somehow posting them seemed kind of pointless. I'll sort of play "catch-up," in as brief a way as possible......maybe tomorrow.
Today I had to log in just to post this. Went appropriately with lessons learned, lately, in my life. In certain ways. And posting something ready-made is always an easy way to ease back into the mild guilt of infrequent blogging.
E-mail from Mariya today:
"A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired. During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups - porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to the hot chocolate.
When they all had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said: 'Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. The cup that you're drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink. What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup; but you consciously went for the best cups... And then you began eyeing each other's cups.
Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain life. The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate God has provided us. God makes the hot chocolate, man chooses the cups. The happiest people don't have the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have. Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly. And enjoy your hot chocolate!"
- Current Mood:
busy
Comments
-Kipluck
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alison
http://utahalison.blogspot.com