31 March 2014
Final Post
Well, it's been a journey. It's been over two and a half years since my last post. Hard to believe. During the academic years 2011-2012 and 2012-2013, I taught in Saint Paul and was able to come home for summers and an extended break over the new year. In addition I visited the family, or they visited me, once or twice a term. This past fall was the same. But, I have had the good fortune to spend this term in Fredericton, holding a visiting position at St. Thomas University. It's been nice to be here with the family on regular basis. But, the kid who was 5YO when I began this blog just had a birthday and is now 13YO! And, after two and a half years of being a part-time parent, etc., etc., and after long and agonizing deliberations, we've decided to return to the US as a family. Most of my expat friends have already heard the news, but I'm posting it here for those who may have this on their blogroll and, like me, often wonder when someone 'disappears.' We love Canada and we will miss many good friends, not to mention the beauty of the Maritimes and proximity to the ocean. But, for at least the next five years, it's important that we all be in the same place. And, due to the conditions that are New Brunswick, that place cannot be here. So, there you have it. Full circle, I suppose. This blog began when we were undertaking the process of gaining permanent residency. I kept it up through the move and settlement. But, now, we return. Oh, Canada! Thanks for reading and for support from various corners over the years. It's been a real adventure. Au revoir!
21 August 2011
Extreme Commuting
I mostly use the blog for the blogroll and not, obviously, posting. But, I thought I'd post a quick update for the one or two folks who may have their own time-sensitive blogroll and will see it...
On Thursday, I'll be leaving for Minnesota. The family is riding out with me, but will return to Canada on Labour Day. I'll be staying and teaching in Saint Paul for the indefinite future. Some think we're nuts, but here's the deal. We can visit - whether in New Brunswick or elsewhere - a few times a semester. I can come home for almost 7 weeks over the new year. I can come home for the summer, generally mid-May until the end of August. So, it's essentially 3.5 months x 2 away, with visits.
Why, you might ask, would we do this? Well, as a tenured full professor I simply cannot get academic employment in Canada. Too much seniority. Between the union environment (which I support) and the general preference for new and 'trainable' young blood... But, that's not so horrible as having taught as an adjunct here for the last three years, my gig in Minnesota is a better deal - it just happens to be in Minnesota which happens to be in the US.
"Yeah, but...," others might ask, "why not leave academia?" Because we chose to live in New Brunswick. I'm not bilingual, and the province is broke (not to mention, but I did, corrupt and nepotistic - is that a word?). If I even could find a job here - say, a decent government job - it would pay about half of what I make teaching in Minnesota. And, I could be laid off in six months. Things are not pretty here, not when it comes to employment.
"Ahhh" you say, "so it's all about the money?" Nope, not at all. I actually like what I do. But, of greater importance is job security and the fact that we have a ten year old who needs to be kept in clothes and fed. And, there's that pesky student loan debt... I can't afford to give up one of the most secure jobs in the continent only to find myself out of work six months later.
So, extreme commuting. I can't remember who coined that phrase, but I like it - though it's true I'm not going to be commuting, per se.
We'll have a blast on our road trip, seeing old friends and going, for the first time, to the Moosewood Restaurant in Ithaca. This is 10YO's - yes, if there are any long-time readers seeing this, 5YO is now 10YO - first trip back to Minnesota since we left in June 2008. He's going to get to see some of his pals - young and old - and we'll make a pilgrimage to the Great Minnesota Get-Together. P will get to savour some of her favorite things such as Fabulous Fudge Bars from Bread & Chocolate and dinner from Big Bowl. Yes, it's a chain, but she loves it. I'm thinking it will be a great trip!
I'll get settled in my temporary housing arrangement, walking distance from campus and set my office back up, sort of - I'm only taking five boxes of books and stuff. And, maybe I'll even find time to do some blogging. Right now I've got several trips planned since they're easy to do from a 'home' base in the States. E.g., In September I'm planning on going to visit my undergraduate mentor - and the reason I ever pursued graduate studies - who now suffers from Alzheimer's and has moved to assisted living. I'm planning on going on what is her birthday weekend and alumni weekend. And, I'll be visiting one of my best friends from my undergraduate days. In October, I'll be meeting the family in Atlanta. I may even arrange to visit some other friends I've not seen in a while. I figure I'm going to make the best of the fact that I have to be there! Before I know it, it will be December and I'll be heading back to spend over a month at home...
On Thursday, I'll be leaving for Minnesota. The family is riding out with me, but will return to Canada on Labour Day. I'll be staying and teaching in Saint Paul for the indefinite future. Some think we're nuts, but here's the deal. We can visit - whether in New Brunswick or elsewhere - a few times a semester. I can come home for almost 7 weeks over the new year. I can come home for the summer, generally mid-May until the end of August. So, it's essentially 3.5 months x 2 away, with visits.
Why, you might ask, would we do this? Well, as a tenured full professor I simply cannot get academic employment in Canada. Too much seniority. Between the union environment (which I support) and the general preference for new and 'trainable' young blood... But, that's not so horrible as having taught as an adjunct here for the last three years, my gig in Minnesota is a better deal - it just happens to be in Minnesota which happens to be in the US.
"Yeah, but...," others might ask, "why not leave academia?" Because we chose to live in New Brunswick. I'm not bilingual, and the province is broke (not to mention, but I did, corrupt and nepotistic - is that a word?). If I even could find a job here - say, a decent government job - it would pay about half of what I make teaching in Minnesota. And, I could be laid off in six months. Things are not pretty here, not when it comes to employment.
"Ahhh" you say, "so it's all about the money?" Nope, not at all. I actually like what I do. But, of greater importance is job security and the fact that we have a ten year old who needs to be kept in clothes and fed. And, there's that pesky student loan debt... I can't afford to give up one of the most secure jobs in the continent only to find myself out of work six months later.
So, extreme commuting. I can't remember who coined that phrase, but I like it - though it's true I'm not going to be commuting, per se.
We'll have a blast on our road trip, seeing old friends and going, for the first time, to the Moosewood Restaurant in Ithaca. This is 10YO's - yes, if there are any long-time readers seeing this, 5YO is now 10YO - first trip back to Minnesota since we left in June 2008. He's going to get to see some of his pals - young and old - and we'll make a pilgrimage to the Great Minnesota Get-Together. P will get to savour some of her favorite things such as Fabulous Fudge Bars from Bread & Chocolate and dinner from Big Bowl. Yes, it's a chain, but she loves it. I'm thinking it will be a great trip!
I'll get settled in my temporary housing arrangement, walking distance from campus and set my office back up, sort of - I'm only taking five boxes of books and stuff. And, maybe I'll even find time to do some blogging. Right now I've got several trips planned since they're easy to do from a 'home' base in the States. E.g., In September I'm planning on going to visit my undergraduate mentor - and the reason I ever pursued graduate studies - who now suffers from Alzheimer's and has moved to assisted living. I'm planning on going on what is her birthday weekend and alumni weekend. And, I'll be visiting one of my best friends from my undergraduate days. In October, I'll be meeting the family in Atlanta. I may even arrange to visit some other friends I've not seen in a while. I figure I'm going to make the best of the fact that I have to be there! Before I know it, it will be December and I'll be heading back to spend over a month at home...
27 April 2011
05 December 2010
And, again...
First, take a look at the Blog Archive to the right.
7 posts in 2010, 36 in 2009, 86 (2008), 99 (2007), 115 (2006). I sense a theme...
I entertained the thought of shutting things down way back - when, exactly, I don't know. But, having posted only seven (this makes eight) times this year, it looks like it's time to move on. I don't have the time to transition the blog to something else. Well, I could, but what I'm focusing on is such a radical departure from this blog, that it would be silly to take it in that direction.
Also, as I said in the last post, I'm in touch with almost everyone who might check in - and make themselves known - on facebook. And, I email with the one person who doesn't use facebook.
So, here's the deal. I'm going to leave the blog visible because it's an easy way to check in with everyone else's blog (US2CA). Also - again, as I mentioned - at the end of August I'll be going to Minnesota by myself, "commuting" - of sorts - between my job there and my family here. That may be a time that I resume blogging more regularly.
I still enjoy checking in with everyone now and again and there are some of you that I still hope to meet, live and in person. I'm very grateful for the support of our expat family, the information, the morale boosters, etc. It's been a heck of a ride!
Happy holidays - whatever it is you may observe - and I'll "see" you sometimes during the coming year!
7 posts in 2010, 36 in 2009, 86 (2008), 99 (2007), 115 (2006). I sense a theme...
I entertained the thought of shutting things down way back - when, exactly, I don't know. But, having posted only seven (this makes eight) times this year, it looks like it's time to move on. I don't have the time to transition the blog to something else. Well, I could, but what I'm focusing on is such a radical departure from this blog, that it would be silly to take it in that direction.
Also, as I said in the last post, I'm in touch with almost everyone who might check in - and make themselves known - on facebook. And, I email with the one person who doesn't use facebook.
So, here's the deal. I'm going to leave the blog visible because it's an easy way to check in with everyone else's blog (US2CA). Also - again, as I mentioned - at the end of August I'll be going to Minnesota by myself, "commuting" - of sorts - between my job there and my family here. That may be a time that I resume blogging more regularly.
I still enjoy checking in with everyone now and again and there are some of you that I still hope to meet, live and in person. I'm very grateful for the support of our expat family, the information, the morale boosters, etc. It's been a heck of a ride!
Happy holidays - whatever it is you may observe - and I'll "see" you sometimes during the coming year!
21 November 2010
Blog Roll
I was just looking at the list of blogs on my sidebar and thinking about how fast time seems to be moving.
We Move to Canada, Alice In Canada, Loud Murmurs, My Life in Exile de Facto, Newly Canadian, Moved to Vancouver, and Soulbliss have all posted within the past two weeks. That's Toronto ON, Fredericton NB, Vancouver BC, Cambridge ON, Sooke BC, Vancouver BC, and the Annapolis Valley, NS. Nice representation!
We Move to Canada, Alice In Canada, Loud Murmurs, My Life in Exile de Facto, Newly Canadian, Moved to Vancouver, and Soulbliss have all posted within the past two weeks. That's Toronto ON, Fredericton NB, Vancouver BC, Cambridge ON, Sooke BC, Vancouver BC, and the Annapolis Valley, NS. Nice representation!
16 November 2010
Hello, hello!
I don't know that anyone checks in here anymore, but just in case... Aside from just having too much going on, I've not been real inclined to write as I've been living in what I think of as Limboland. But, here's the upshot...
For the 2011-2012 academic year, I will be "commuting" between Minnesota and New Brunswick. I've said, all along, that I was fortunate to be able to immigrate and not have to quit my job in the US. As a tenured, full professor, I can't get a job here - at least not in academia. But, I knew that. It's one of the downsides of a union environment. And, while I'd be happy with a number of other jobs, for a whole lot of reasons - not the least of which is a terrible economic situation here - that's not an option right now. But, neither are we prepared to give up, uproot, and move back - lock, stock, and barrel.
So, I've arranged my teaching schedule - I'll be teaching Tuesday through Thursday - so that I should be able to do something like spend three weeks in Minnesota, one week at home, three weeks in Minnesota... and so on. Not optimal, but better than having to leave - or not being able to put food on the table. If we lived in Toronto, I'd be able to come back almost every weekend. Alas, we don't live in Toronto. Between Labour Day and the middle of May, I should only have to be gone for a total of about six months. E.g., I can come home the second week of December and not go back until the first of February. It will be interesting. Heck, some people travel that much for work even though they still "live" at home.
P, an employee of the provincial government, attended a briefing today on the sorry state of the province. They pretty much outlined what is contained in the above link. I.e., An aging population with fewer and fewer younger folks sticking around and too great a reliance on money from Ottawa. I remain convinced that there must be some major corruption - or at least stupidity - for such a small province to manage things so poorly. Something's gotta give. I think there's also a mindset that is, in some way, several decades behind the times. But, that's another story for another time. Okay - one little thing. There's a big meeting coming up regarding the future of 9YO's school. When, you might ask? Why, on the first night of Hanukkah. Yes, that would be the meeting that's a couple of weeks before the Christmas concert. Yes, Christmas concert. Okay, enough on that.
We love much of what we've encountered here. No, not the crooked contractors, the lousy lawyers, the lack of future-oriented thinking... But, we do love our neighbours. We love the landscape and the pace. I love the non-profit community in which I've become involved. 9YO loves his school, his friends, his neighbourhood. But, we've gotta eat. Okay, yeah, I could eat less, but I've still gotta eat!
Because of the way academia works, there's a good chance that I'll do the same thing for 2012-2013. But, depending on what's happening with P's work, we may all end up spending that year in Minnesota. In the fall of 2012, 9YO will be 11YO and in grade six - how did that happen? Anyway, that's kind of the point at which we leave or figure out a way to stay.
I've no idea what will happen, but I thought that since I now know what is happening next year, I'd post a note sharing that info.
In other news, things are going well with my work in wrongful convictions and efforts to roll out the new organization. In addition to my two classes online, I'm teaching two classes here next term. I'm looking forward to a trip to Ohio in April for the Innocence Network conference and a trip to Arizona in May for my mother's 80th. But, first? The holidays and winter! Bring it on.
For the 2011-2012 academic year, I will be "commuting" between Minnesota and New Brunswick. I've said, all along, that I was fortunate to be able to immigrate and not have to quit my job in the US. As a tenured, full professor, I can't get a job here - at least not in academia. But, I knew that. It's one of the downsides of a union environment. And, while I'd be happy with a number of other jobs, for a whole lot of reasons - not the least of which is a terrible economic situation here - that's not an option right now. But, neither are we prepared to give up, uproot, and move back - lock, stock, and barrel.
So, I've arranged my teaching schedule - I'll be teaching Tuesday through Thursday - so that I should be able to do something like spend three weeks in Minnesota, one week at home, three weeks in Minnesota... and so on. Not optimal, but better than having to leave - or not being able to put food on the table. If we lived in Toronto, I'd be able to come back almost every weekend. Alas, we don't live in Toronto. Between Labour Day and the middle of May, I should only have to be gone for a total of about six months. E.g., I can come home the second week of December and not go back until the first of February. It will be interesting. Heck, some people travel that much for work even though they still "live" at home.
P, an employee of the provincial government, attended a briefing today on the sorry state of the province. They pretty much outlined what is contained in the above link. I.e., An aging population with fewer and fewer younger folks sticking around and too great a reliance on money from Ottawa. I remain convinced that there must be some major corruption - or at least stupidity - for such a small province to manage things so poorly. Something's gotta give. I think there's also a mindset that is, in some way, several decades behind the times. But, that's another story for another time. Okay - one little thing. There's a big meeting coming up regarding the future of 9YO's school. When, you might ask? Why, on the first night of Hanukkah. Yes, that would be the meeting that's a couple of weeks before the Christmas concert. Yes, Christmas concert. Okay, enough on that.
We love much of what we've encountered here. No, not the crooked contractors, the lousy lawyers, the lack of future-oriented thinking... But, we do love our neighbours. We love the landscape and the pace. I love the non-profit community in which I've become involved. 9YO loves his school, his friends, his neighbourhood. But, we've gotta eat. Okay, yeah, I could eat less, but I've still gotta eat!
Because of the way academia works, there's a good chance that I'll do the same thing for 2012-2013. But, depending on what's happening with P's work, we may all end up spending that year in Minnesota. In the fall of 2012, 9YO will be 11YO and in grade six - how did that happen? Anyway, that's kind of the point at which we leave or figure out a way to stay.
I've no idea what will happen, but I thought that since I now know what is happening next year, I'd post a note sharing that info.
In other news, things are going well with my work in wrongful convictions and efforts to roll out the new organization. In addition to my two classes online, I'm teaching two classes here next term. I'm looking forward to a trip to Ohio in April for the Innocence Network conference and a trip to Arizona in May for my mother's 80th. But, first? The holidays and winter! Bring it on.
23 August 2010
Time Flies...
I just noticed - when going to my blog to check on others' blogs - that I last posted two months ago today. Geez. The summer has just flown. Since that post I've been to Nova Scotia, PEI, Montreal, and Atlanta. My sister visited for three weeks - which was great! And, I've been busy with more house stuff and hassling with Canada Revenue - who, for reasons unknown - decided that P entered Canada in August 2009 and, thus, was a part-time resident. That, of course, created all kinds of changes to her return, which affected mine, blah, blah, blah. I keep waiting for the "dust to settle." Alas, it doesn't seem to to so. Fortunately, we still love it here. I should write more, but 9YO will be walking in the door at any moment. I can't believe we've been here over two years now and that some time next fall we'll be able to apply for citizenship. Yippee! Hope all is well with you and yours!
23 June 2010
Bizarre!
Okay, the disclaimers... Yes, "people are different." No, we don't know what else might be going on. And, well, just read on.
Several months ago, friends of ours who moved from the US to Canada put us in touch with a couple, J&S, who were thinking of making the move North. But, specifically, they were thinking of New Brunswick! Yea! I composed several lengthy emails with my take on the pros and the cons and then, as they firmed up plans (so it seemed), several about vacation/tourism stuff. J&S were going to spend a week up here and check the place out. I recommended a decent hotel - with free wireless (critical!) and free movies - that had suite options as they would be coming with their two girls, one of whom is right around 9YO's age. Then, it occurred to me that they might like the opportunity to meet some of those in our fledgling Rainbow Families Network group. I asked if they would like me to arrange a small get-together so that they could do so. "Yes," J said. So, I got a sense of what would work - school ends Friday, some folks will head to their camps, etc. - and we set a date and time. Eight people (two couples and four coming alone) indicated that they would join us. Great! I emailed with J last week, just to pass on a few things like the fact that if you enter the border at Woodstock there's a nice visitor centre there.
Now, let me go back to July 2007. We flew into Halifax and spent four days in Nova Scotia. Then, on Thursday, 5 July, we drove to New Brunswick, arriving in Fredericton on a dreary, drizzly afternoon. I swear we didn't see a soul on the streets. It looked dark and depressing. That evening I was in a panic. We were so set on Fredericton being the "right" place for us and now I was second-guessing that. I remember that I could barely sleep. Snark warning! But, unlike some people, we didn't have anyone local to call and talk to about our initial impressions, to talk us down. We didn't have someone who had planned a get together for us, knowing that we might have, at least to some degree, an immediate circle of friends to welcome us. End of snark. But, the next morning was sunny and bright. I had a great meeting with someone from the university. We walked along the river. We didn't know for sure what would happen, but we were going to have a great vacation anyway. By the end of the day we knew this was the place.
Okay, back to 2010. Around 9 last night I received this message: "Well, we arrived. I don't think we can stay here thru the weekend. Sorry. Would you like to meet us tomorrow Wed for Breakfast? J"
Huh? Well, I was just, um, gobsmacked...
I immediately replied asking if everything was okay. I didn't hear back. I emailed again. She had left her number, so I called. No answer. Then, I decide to pack it in and soak in the tub. Phone rings. It was truly one of the most bizarre conversations I've had in a long time. She said that the kids were antsy, there was nothing to do, they had planned poorly, they're going to leave, "head east," and drive back south along the coast. "We went to a bookstore and I thought, 'I could do this at home,'" she said.
"All we've seen are highways," she said. Um, you just spent two days driving... Mind you, Fredericton has about 80,000 people, including the surrounding communities. It's not like the 401 runs through town. Yes, the hotel is on the retail strip from hell, but two minutes later you can be in a forest.
When she suggested that perhaps I understood, I said, "No, not really. We arrived on a Thursday afternoon with five days to spend and not nearly enough time to do everything we wanted." We had emailed about a day to Hopewell Rocks, a day in St. Andrews, time to check out different neighbourhoods... She just kept saying, "I guess we didn't plan well" and then, "There's nothing to do until the weekend" - when there's a multicultural festival in town.
Let me add that if she had said anything like, "I'm not liking what I see," or "It seems too small," or "I don't see any ethnic restaurants," or something besides "There's nothing to do," I would have been more empathetic and shared my experience of our first day. But, she sounded like a whiny twelve year old in a room with 500 books, a tv, and a computer. "Wahhhh, there's nothing to do." Or, as I've been known to say, in a well-stocked kitchen, "There's nothing to eat."
Nothing to do? Um - we had emailed about day trips to Hopewell Rocks, St. Martins, St. Andrews, beaches, parks, museums, the farmers' market, etc. It's not NYC, but then nobody operates under the illusion that it is. There's lots to do. But, it's not going to come knocking on your hotel room door.
Do I sound more annoyed than I should? Less understanding than I might? Yup. I was pissed. I had spent a considerable amount of time composing lengthy emails chock full of information. I had spent a fair amount of time planning a get-together with a bunch of over-committed people so that they would be able to hear about the place from more than just us.
But, most of all, I realize, I'm pissed because they didn't give the place a chance. When we got settled, we felt like we had discovered an overlooked gem. You know, we're in the fly-over/drive-through province. Fredericton was our little secret. No, not everyone will love it. Those of you in Toronto and Vancouver probably couldn't stand the fact that, e.g., I can count the "good" restaurants on one hand and the "ethnic" restaurants on the other. That's been our biggest complaint. But, we love that "rush hour" here is a joke to anyone from a "real" city. We love that we can be at the beach in an hour or in the middle of a forest in a few minutes. I love that when we do go to our favourite restaurants, servers actually recognize us. So, yeah, while it shouldn't be it feels like a slap in the face that they spent a few hours here, hung out at what I'm assuming was Chapters at the mall, and decided it was a bust. If they were at the local independent bookstore downtown then I'm even more puzzled as Fredericton has one of the most vibrant and charming downtown communities I've ever seen.
So, no, I didn't go to breakfast. I didn't feel like crossing the street to meet them, let alone going to breakfast. But, we had to decide what to do about Sunday. I emailed and explained that our guests would not be coming after all and that I would understand if folks had planned on coming primarily to be welcoming of our guests. Note: We had just had our monthly get-together. But, we would be here, with snacks and refreshments, for whoever (or is that whomever, I never know!) wanted to stop by. I'm happy to report that folks are coming, include a few who missed the last gathering will be coming. We'll visit. And, just maybe we'll all talk about how much we love Fredericton.
Several months ago, friends of ours who moved from the US to Canada put us in touch with a couple, J&S, who were thinking of making the move North. But, specifically, they were thinking of New Brunswick! Yea! I composed several lengthy emails with my take on the pros and the cons and then, as they firmed up plans (so it seemed), several about vacation/tourism stuff. J&S were going to spend a week up here and check the place out. I recommended a decent hotel - with free wireless (critical!) and free movies - that had suite options as they would be coming with their two girls, one of whom is right around 9YO's age. Then, it occurred to me that they might like the opportunity to meet some of those in our fledgling Rainbow Families Network group. I asked if they would like me to arrange a small get-together so that they could do so. "Yes," J said. So, I got a sense of what would work - school ends Friday, some folks will head to their camps, etc. - and we set a date and time. Eight people (two couples and four coming alone) indicated that they would join us. Great! I emailed with J last week, just to pass on a few things like the fact that if you enter the border at Woodstock there's a nice visitor centre there.
Now, let me go back to July 2007. We flew into Halifax and spent four days in Nova Scotia. Then, on Thursday, 5 July, we drove to New Brunswick, arriving in Fredericton on a dreary, drizzly afternoon. I swear we didn't see a soul on the streets. It looked dark and depressing. That evening I was in a panic. We were so set on Fredericton being the "right" place for us and now I was second-guessing that. I remember that I could barely sleep. Snark warning! But, unlike some people, we didn't have anyone local to call and talk to about our initial impressions, to talk us down. We didn't have someone who had planned a get together for us, knowing that we might have, at least to some degree, an immediate circle of friends to welcome us. End of snark. But, the next morning was sunny and bright. I had a great meeting with someone from the university. We walked along the river. We didn't know for sure what would happen, but we were going to have a great vacation anyway. By the end of the day we knew this was the place.
Okay, back to 2010. Around 9 last night I received this message: "Well, we arrived. I don't think we can stay here thru the weekend. Sorry. Would you like to meet us tomorrow Wed for Breakfast? J"
Huh? Well, I was just, um, gobsmacked...
I immediately replied asking if everything was okay. I didn't hear back. I emailed again. She had left her number, so I called. No answer. Then, I decide to pack it in and soak in the tub. Phone rings. It was truly one of the most bizarre conversations I've had in a long time. She said that the kids were antsy, there was nothing to do, they had planned poorly, they're going to leave, "head east," and drive back south along the coast. "We went to a bookstore and I thought, 'I could do this at home,'" she said.
"All we've seen are highways," she said. Um, you just spent two days driving... Mind you, Fredericton has about 80,000 people, including the surrounding communities. It's not like the 401 runs through town. Yes, the hotel is on the retail strip from hell, but two minutes later you can be in a forest.
When she suggested that perhaps I understood, I said, "No, not really. We arrived on a Thursday afternoon with five days to spend and not nearly enough time to do everything we wanted." We had emailed about a day to Hopewell Rocks, a day in St. Andrews, time to check out different neighbourhoods... She just kept saying, "I guess we didn't plan well" and then, "There's nothing to do until the weekend" - when there's a multicultural festival in town.
Let me add that if she had said anything like, "I'm not liking what I see," or "It seems too small," or "I don't see any ethnic restaurants," or something besides "There's nothing to do," I would have been more empathetic and shared my experience of our first day. But, she sounded like a whiny twelve year old in a room with 500 books, a tv, and a computer. "Wahhhh, there's nothing to do." Or, as I've been known to say, in a well-stocked kitchen, "There's nothing to eat."
Nothing to do? Um - we had emailed about day trips to Hopewell Rocks, St. Martins, St. Andrews, beaches, parks, museums, the farmers' market, etc. It's not NYC, but then nobody operates under the illusion that it is. There's lots to do. But, it's not going to come knocking on your hotel room door.
Do I sound more annoyed than I should? Less understanding than I might? Yup. I was pissed. I had spent a considerable amount of time composing lengthy emails chock full of information. I had spent a fair amount of time planning a get-together with a bunch of over-committed people so that they would be able to hear about the place from more than just us.
But, most of all, I realize, I'm pissed because they didn't give the place a chance. When we got settled, we felt like we had discovered an overlooked gem. You know, we're in the fly-over/drive-through province. Fredericton was our little secret. No, not everyone will love it. Those of you in Toronto and Vancouver probably couldn't stand the fact that, e.g., I can count the "good" restaurants on one hand and the "ethnic" restaurants on the other. That's been our biggest complaint. But, we love that "rush hour" here is a joke to anyone from a "real" city. We love that we can be at the beach in an hour or in the middle of a forest in a few minutes. I love that when we do go to our favourite restaurants, servers actually recognize us. So, yeah, while it shouldn't be it feels like a slap in the face that they spent a few hours here, hung out at what I'm assuming was Chapters at the mall, and decided it was a bust. If they were at the local independent bookstore downtown then I'm even more puzzled as Fredericton has one of the most vibrant and charming downtown communities I've ever seen.
So, no, I didn't go to breakfast. I didn't feel like crossing the street to meet them, let alone going to breakfast. But, we had to decide what to do about Sunday. I emailed and explained that our guests would not be coming after all and that I would understand if folks had planned on coming primarily to be welcoming of our guests. Note: We had just had our monthly get-together. But, we would be here, with snacks and refreshments, for whoever (or is that whomever, I never know!) wanted to stop by. I'm happy to report that folks are coming, include a few who missed the last gathering will be coming. We'll visit. And, just maybe we'll all talk about how much we love Fredericton.
12 May 2010
Hoo-ah!
I finally have some good - no, great - news to report. Yesterday I had an MRI of my knee and today I signed the settlement papers re the house lawsuit and picked up a cheque for about 3/4 of what is due to me. Woo-hoo!
First, the MRI. Old-timers might recall that back in May 2008, when I was visiting Fredericton right before the move, I ended up in the ER with a knee issue. The ER doc said torn meniscus, but that has never been documented. In July of that year I got on the waiting list to see and orthopedic surgeon. Then, in December 2009, my other knee went. And, that knee has been worse than the other. In early April 2010, I saw the orthopedic surgeon. But, by then it was the right knee that was worse than the knee that had originally gotten me the referral! He he put in a request for the MRI marked semi-urgent. Voila! Yesterday? MRI. Results in 7-10 days. I actually hope they find something that can be addressed. If not... I guess I'm just stuck with a bum knee.
Then... again, old-timers might recall - the lawsuit. We broke ground in June 2008. In January 2009, the day they put the last nail in the garage, the wacko builder made up a false invoice and sued me! Almost sixteen months - and about $4K in legal fees - later, I signed a settlement that gives me the remaining funds in escrow and the builder's HST rebate. We're still thousands in the hole in terms of what the repairs of deficiencies will cost, but had we gone to trial and "won" - and we would have - I would never have received a penny more - and it would have cost a bundle. He's borrowing from Peter to pay Paul and can easily show that the business, which is incorporated, doesn't have two loonies to rub together. And, at least, aside from $3K worth, the deficiencies are really cosmetic.
Aside from the good news, above, things are, I think, looking up. We've found someone to do the landscaping. He's a New Brunswicker who recently moved back from Toronto. That's a good thing. He knows New Brunswick, but he actually knows how to do business, write up a quote, etc. Hope it all works out! And, we've got someone lined up to repair the faulty window well and do the finishing on the inside of the basement windows. Fingers crossed!
I'm wrapping up the semester for my US online courses and getting ready for three online summer courses. I've got to get the outline for my book written and off to the publisher. I'm waiting to hear if I'll have to go to California to testify later this summer. And, my sister arrives from San Diego on 29 June, for three weeks. Gosh I am so hoping for a good summer!!!!
That's it - work to be done. But, had to share the latest as there are some of you I know have been waiting to see this post!
First, the MRI. Old-timers might recall that back in May 2008, when I was visiting Fredericton right before the move, I ended up in the ER with a knee issue. The ER doc said torn meniscus, but that has never been documented. In July of that year I got on the waiting list to see and orthopedic surgeon. Then, in December 2009, my other knee went. And, that knee has been worse than the other. In early April 2010, I saw the orthopedic surgeon. But, by then it was the right knee that was worse than the knee that had originally gotten me the referral! He he put in a request for the MRI marked semi-urgent. Voila! Yesterday? MRI. Results in 7-10 days. I actually hope they find something that can be addressed. If not... I guess I'm just stuck with a bum knee.
Then... again, old-timers might recall - the lawsuit. We broke ground in June 2008. In January 2009, the day they put the last nail in the garage, the wacko builder made up a false invoice and sued me! Almost sixteen months - and about $4K in legal fees - later, I signed a settlement that gives me the remaining funds in escrow and the builder's HST rebate. We're still thousands in the hole in terms of what the repairs of deficiencies will cost, but had we gone to trial and "won" - and we would have - I would never have received a penny more - and it would have cost a bundle. He's borrowing from Peter to pay Paul and can easily show that the business, which is incorporated, doesn't have two loonies to rub together. And, at least, aside from $3K worth, the deficiencies are really cosmetic.
Aside from the good news, above, things are, I think, looking up. We've found someone to do the landscaping. He's a New Brunswicker who recently moved back from Toronto. That's a good thing. He knows New Brunswick, but he actually knows how to do business, write up a quote, etc. Hope it all works out! And, we've got someone lined up to repair the faulty window well and do the finishing on the inside of the basement windows. Fingers crossed!
I'm wrapping up the semester for my US online courses and getting ready for three online summer courses. I've got to get the outline for my book written and off to the publisher. I'm waiting to hear if I'll have to go to California to testify later this summer. And, my sister arrives from San Diego on 29 June, for three weeks. Gosh I am so hoping for a good summer!!!!
That's it - work to be done. But, had to share the latest as there are some of you I know have been waiting to see this post!
03 April 2010
April
I had planned to post this on the first, thinking that I may be able to manage quarterly posts. Alas, here it is the 3rd already.
It's a beautiful Spring day here in Fredericton. At 24°/75° it's too hot for me, in fact! Tomorrow it's supposed to be even warmer. But, the sun is a welcome visitor. We picked up new deck rail boxes with the hopes of getting some (legal) herbs growing this year. We're cleaning up the woodpile, even though we'll be able to have evening fires well into the summer. And, we're scouting out landscaping people as this year we have to get something going. I realized that, aside from cost - and, no, we're still waiting to settle the litigation with the builder - one of the reasons that it's been difficult to "commit" to further expenditures on "settling in" is because of the fear that we're going to have to go back for a while. But, as time goes on - and things in the US get more and more insane - we're much more of a "no matter what it takes" mind set. As I've said before, between paying off some debt and knowing that we have a small mouth to feed, we've got to be realistic. But, things are definitely moving along in that regard.
Those of you on facebook likely know some of the following, but here's the latest in my world. As I mentioned in the last post, I was asked to serve as one of seven expert witnesses in a US legal case. I am now free to say that it is in the case Lxg Cxbxn Republicans versus Uxxxxd Sxxxxs, a challenge to "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (DADT) in a US District Court. Yes, I get quite a chuckle out of the fact that I'm working for the gay Republicans - and I still think that that's an oxymoron - but, hey, whatever it takes. I wrote my report and last Monday I spent seven hours in a deposition. I quite enjoyed the fact that two attorneys from the US Department of Justice and the attorney representing LCR flew into little ol' Fredericton to depose little ol' me. Those of you who remember the hideous brief re DOMA, filed by the DOJ under the Obama Administration, might "enjoy" the fact that the attorney who deposed me is named on that brief and believed to have been the author. I'm actually glad I didn't know that until after the fact. Of course, had I know that I would have said even more than I did when he asked why I was living in Canada! I did say, "Because my family has legal recognition that is denied to us in the US," but I would have elaborated had I known his role in that ugly brief. The next step is that, if I am called to testify at trial, I will go to California in June to do so. A lot could happen between now and then, but if it's a go, I'm prepared.
On a related note, I was asked to visit the UConn School of Law - all expenses paid - and speak as part of a panel for a DADT event. I'll get to meet some folks where it's a case of "we've known about each other for years, but never met" and see a colleague I've not seen since 2006. Some of you may have heard about his book, read him on HuffPo, or seen him on the Daily Show - Nathaniel Frank, author of Unfriendly Fire: How the Gay Ban Undermines the Military and Weakens America. So, that will be fun.
But, before that I'm flying to Atlanta for the Innocence Network conference. While there I'll also see my (conservative) brother and sister-in-law and visit P's mother and brother and, hopefully, his partner. From there I fly to Ohio to visit the inmate with whom I'm working on a wrongful conviction case, thus my interest in the Innocence Network. And, then, from there I go to Connecticut and then back to Fredericton.
I return from my trip at 11:00 on a Friday night and the next two days I'll be in a Restorative Justice workshop with the John Howard Society all day. I'm really looking forward to that as it's an area I've been wanting to be able to get into more! And, I'm teaching RJ here in the fall, so even better!
I may also soon begin serving as co-chair of the Community Action Group on Homelessness-Fredericton. I had agreed to serve as chair, but then something else fell in my lap so we're hoping to set up a co-chair arrangement with someone who's really interested, but didn't feel she could take on chairing.
What fell in my lap is that I was contacted by a publisher and asked if I would agree to write another reference book. My previous book was on DADT. This one is a bit more broad in that it's "sexual orientation and the military." Thus, I can expand the scope a bit, both in terms of time and substance. The outline is due in June, 25% due in January, and the remainder due in January 2012. Guess you know what I'll be doing...
I also want to start a longer term research project that takes me in a new direction. Frankly, I keep trying to escape from DADT, but it keeps sucking me back into its grips. It's just too hard to turn down having my work acknowledged (e.g., the case and the panel) and too hard to turn down a guaranteed book publication. But, I'm looking into a new project that would focus on the adversarial nature of the North American legal system and its role in wrongful convictions. It would allow me to bring two of my major interests together so that makes it a fun and attractive enterprise!
Finally, another two-moms couple, C & D, with a son, A, moved her from Toronto last year and decided to try to start a GLBT parenting group. We had a small get together at their place last month and next Sunday we're hosting one at our place. We had dinner with C & D and their son, A, last night and really enjoyed it. Most of the GLBT parents we've met have kids because of someone's prior marriage to a man. It was nice to chat with someone who made the decision together, went the same route we had, etc.
Oh, and in May I'm doing a session on families at a conference for youth involved in their high school Gay Straight Alliances. A friend is one the openly gay teachers involved in the organization and he invited me to participate. Should be fun. I'm going to do it as a "brief intro followed by Q&A" type thing with questions submitted in writing - to avoid the "I'm afraid to ask the stupid question" phenomenon.
What else? Let's see. In January I wrote:
1. I'm hoping that our litigation is resolved favourably - okay, that really is number one. Nope, not yet. But, if I don't hear from my lawyer by 27 April - six months from discovery - he's fired and I'll handle it myself.
2. I'm looking forward to my sister's three week visit in July. She arrives on the 29th of June. Can't wait!
3. I'm looking forward to travels to Boston and Atlanta - conferences that we turn into vacations. We went to Boston and had a great time. Too much good food, though! Looking forward to Atlanta, etc.
4. I'm hoping for some improvement in my health. I see an orthopedic surgeon on Tuesday. I went on the waiting list in July 2008. I believe it was the 10th of July. I'm anxious to see what he says as my right leg and right shoulder are really bad right now. Then I go to see what the new BP meds are doing, or not.
5. I'm going to decide whether I'm going to get licensed to practice here, or not. With the book commitment that's less and less likely, but I'm not completely ruling it out yet.
6. I'm hoping we'll be able to get the landscaping done. As above, we're starting to get bids.
7. I'm looking forward to my workshop with the Alternatives to Violence Project. The first one was phenomenal, the second was sort of bizarre - due, it seems, to an inmate who was set off the presence of a very openly gay young man. But, I'm looking forward to the third workshop.
8. I'm hoping that we can squeeze in visits to PEI and Kouchibouguac. We'll definitely do Kouchibouguac, probably when my sister is here. We might try to do PEI in August over the holiday weekend.
9. I'm looking forward to the Inequality and Social Justice course I'm teaching here. I think it's gone well, but I'm still adjusting to the difference in students. E.g., "Yes, I really do expect you to attend the first class meeting."
10. I'm looking forward to more beach time with [then] 9YO. Soon, soon!
So, all in all I'd have to say that things are going great. P found out that her job is extended through next March and 9YO - yes, he's now 9YO!!!!! - still loves his school. When asked about it he proudly explains/exclaims, "The oldest continually operating school in Canada!" He's had a very good year and has decided he loves reading. Finally. He gets up around 5 am, sets the timer on the oven, and reads for thirty minutes before getting ready for school. I could handle it if he got up a little later - but at least he's reading! After a summer (2008) of hour-long fits over "Sam sat. Matt sat," that he's devouring chapter books on his own feels like nothing short of a miracle.
I could probably think of more. It's been a while. But, it's time to go up and see about supper. Hope all is well with you. I check the blogs of the "regulars" - well - regularly. I'm just not often inclined to write about what's happening here. Know that, if I know of your existence as an expat, I think of you often!
UPDATE: I changed the case name above as I'd rather that this post not come up when folks are searching on it. I'm sure you can figure it out, but feel free to email me if you want to know more.
It's a beautiful Spring day here in Fredericton. At 24°/75° it's too hot for me, in fact! Tomorrow it's supposed to be even warmer. But, the sun is a welcome visitor. We picked up new deck rail boxes with the hopes of getting some (legal) herbs growing this year. We're cleaning up the woodpile, even though we'll be able to have evening fires well into the summer. And, we're scouting out landscaping people as this year we have to get something going. I realized that, aside from cost - and, no, we're still waiting to settle the litigation with the builder - one of the reasons that it's been difficult to "commit" to further expenditures on "settling in" is because of the fear that we're going to have to go back for a while. But, as time goes on - and things in the US get more and more insane - we're much more of a "no matter what it takes" mind set. As I've said before, between paying off some debt and knowing that we have a small mouth to feed, we've got to be realistic. But, things are definitely moving along in that regard.
Those of you on facebook likely know some of the following, but here's the latest in my world. As I mentioned in the last post, I was asked to serve as one of seven expert witnesses in a US legal case. I am now free to say that it is in the case Lxg Cxbxn Republicans versus Uxxxxd Sxxxxs, a challenge to "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" (DADT) in a US District Court. Yes, I get quite a chuckle out of the fact that I'm working for the gay Republicans - and I still think that that's an oxymoron - but, hey, whatever it takes. I wrote my report and last Monday I spent seven hours in a deposition. I quite enjoyed the fact that two attorneys from the US Department of Justice and the attorney representing LCR flew into little ol' Fredericton to depose little ol' me. Those of you who remember the hideous brief re DOMA, filed by the DOJ under the Obama Administration, might "enjoy" the fact that the attorney who deposed me is named on that brief and believed to have been the author. I'm actually glad I didn't know that until after the fact. Of course, had I know that I would have said even more than I did when he asked why I was living in Canada! I did say, "Because my family has legal recognition that is denied to us in the US," but I would have elaborated had I known his role in that ugly brief. The next step is that, if I am called to testify at trial, I will go to California in June to do so. A lot could happen between now and then, but if it's a go, I'm prepared.
On a related note, I was asked to visit the UConn School of Law - all expenses paid - and speak as part of a panel for a DADT event. I'll get to meet some folks where it's a case of "we've known about each other for years, but never met" and see a colleague I've not seen since 2006. Some of you may have heard about his book, read him on HuffPo, or seen him on the Daily Show - Nathaniel Frank, author of Unfriendly Fire: How the Gay Ban Undermines the Military and Weakens America. So, that will be fun.
But, before that I'm flying to Atlanta for the Innocence Network conference. While there I'll also see my (conservative) brother and sister-in-law and visit P's mother and brother and, hopefully, his partner. From there I fly to Ohio to visit the inmate with whom I'm working on a wrongful conviction case, thus my interest in the Innocence Network. And, then, from there I go to Connecticut and then back to Fredericton.
I return from my trip at 11:00 on a Friday night and the next two days I'll be in a Restorative Justice workshop with the John Howard Society all day. I'm really looking forward to that as it's an area I've been wanting to be able to get into more! And, I'm teaching RJ here in the fall, so even better!
I may also soon begin serving as co-chair of the Community Action Group on Homelessness-Fredericton. I had agreed to serve as chair, but then something else fell in my lap so we're hoping to set up a co-chair arrangement with someone who's really interested, but didn't feel she could take on chairing.
What fell in my lap is that I was contacted by a publisher and asked if I would agree to write another reference book. My previous book was on DADT. This one is a bit more broad in that it's "sexual orientation and the military." Thus, I can expand the scope a bit, both in terms of time and substance. The outline is due in June, 25% due in January, and the remainder due in January 2012. Guess you know what I'll be doing...
I also want to start a longer term research project that takes me in a new direction. Frankly, I keep trying to escape from DADT, but it keeps sucking me back into its grips. It's just too hard to turn down having my work acknowledged (e.g., the case and the panel) and too hard to turn down a guaranteed book publication. But, I'm looking into a new project that would focus on the adversarial nature of the North American legal system and its role in wrongful convictions. It would allow me to bring two of my major interests together so that makes it a fun and attractive enterprise!
Finally, another two-moms couple, C & D, with a son, A, moved her from Toronto last year and decided to try to start a GLBT parenting group. We had a small get together at their place last month and next Sunday we're hosting one at our place. We had dinner with C & D and their son, A, last night and really enjoyed it. Most of the GLBT parents we've met have kids because of someone's prior marriage to a man. It was nice to chat with someone who made the decision together, went the same route we had, etc.
Oh, and in May I'm doing a session on families at a conference for youth involved in their high school Gay Straight Alliances. A friend is one the openly gay teachers involved in the organization and he invited me to participate. Should be fun. I'm going to do it as a "brief intro followed by Q&A" type thing with questions submitted in writing - to avoid the "I'm afraid to ask the stupid question" phenomenon.
What else? Let's see. In January I wrote:
1. I'm hoping that our litigation is resolved favourably - okay, that really is number one. Nope, not yet. But, if I don't hear from my lawyer by 27 April - six months from discovery - he's fired and I'll handle it myself.
2. I'm looking forward to my sister's three week visit in July. She arrives on the 29th of June. Can't wait!
3. I'm looking forward to travels to Boston and Atlanta - conferences that we turn into vacations. We went to Boston and had a great time. Too much good food, though! Looking forward to Atlanta, etc.
4. I'm hoping for some improvement in my health. I see an orthopedic surgeon on Tuesday. I went on the waiting list in July 2008. I believe it was the 10th of July. I'm anxious to see what he says as my right leg and right shoulder are really bad right now. Then I go to see what the new BP meds are doing, or not.
5. I'm going to decide whether I'm going to get licensed to practice here, or not. With the book commitment that's less and less likely, but I'm not completely ruling it out yet.
6. I'm hoping we'll be able to get the landscaping done. As above, we're starting to get bids.
7. I'm looking forward to my workshop with the Alternatives to Violence Project. The first one was phenomenal, the second was sort of bizarre - due, it seems, to an inmate who was set off the presence of a very openly gay young man. But, I'm looking forward to the third workshop.
8. I'm hoping that we can squeeze in visits to PEI and Kouchibouguac. We'll definitely do Kouchibouguac, probably when my sister is here. We might try to do PEI in August over the holiday weekend.
9. I'm looking forward to the Inequality and Social Justice course I'm teaching here. I think it's gone well, but I'm still adjusting to the difference in students. E.g., "Yes, I really do expect you to attend the first class meeting."
10. I'm looking forward to more beach time with [then] 9YO. Soon, soon!
So, all in all I'd have to say that things are going great. P found out that her job is extended through next March and 9YO - yes, he's now 9YO!!!!! - still loves his school. When asked about it he proudly explains/exclaims, "The oldest continually operating school in Canada!" He's had a very good year and has decided he loves reading. Finally. He gets up around 5 am, sets the timer on the oven, and reads for thirty minutes before getting ready for school. I could handle it if he got up a little later - but at least he's reading! After a summer (2008) of hour-long fits over "Sam sat. Matt sat," that he's devouring chapter books on his own feels like nothing short of a miracle.
I could probably think of more. It's been a while. But, it's time to go up and see about supper. Hope all is well with you. I check the blogs of the "regulars" - well - regularly. I'm just not often inclined to write about what's happening here. Know that, if I know of your existence as an expat, I think of you often!
UPDATE: I changed the case name above as I'd rather that this post not come up when folks are searching on it. I'm sure you can figure it out, but feel free to email me if you want to know more.
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