because I just wanna talk and talk and talk...

bored lah. Done with my finals, praying hard for the results.

ok, so, after New York, I have several options to where I want to go for the next break:

1) Yukon Territory

Seriously. In the winter. I want to watch Iditarod (dog sledding, huskies awwww) and catch the aurora. And only those 2 are available in the winter when its -40 degrees outside. Since that province is just above Alberta so heh, why not :)

2) Peru/ South American countries.

Vamos por favor!!!! I need to see the Machu Picchu, pronto!!!!!

3) Salzburg.

The hiiiillsss are alive, with the sound of muuuusssiiccc

ok, maybe I watched too much The Sound of Music, but there is a Mozart tour too there if I'm not mistaken. MUST GO AND SEE MOZART'S HOUSE!!! I hope there is a Beethoven tour too, he is my favourite composer

4) Vietnam

I'm only putting this up because my family is spending their holidays over there now and they are having fun without me :'(

Amirot and Ninot tolong shoppingkan utk I tau

maybe I should open a traveling blog. Something like Anthony Bourdain meets Lonely Planet Six Degrees. Or I can change this blog here into a traveling blog! :)

This break:

NEW YORK CITY HERE I COME!!!

Next break:

Vamos a PERU con mis amigos por favor!

O viajamos en paises del sur america

Visitamos a Machu Picchu, tomemos el sol en las playas, y comemos muchas paellas!

Soy muy emocionado :)

Pero, necessito mucho dinero, tengo que trabajar..maybe?

p/s: Boleh lah hablar espanol dgn local tahun depan

Dear God, tolong murah kan rezeki ku tahun depan seperti kau telah murahkan rezeki ku tahun ini. Amin. I really really really need to see that Machu Picchu, por favor. Gracias :)

p/s/s: bak kata lululemon: Dance, Sing, Floss, Travel

But first, let's nail this finals! 3.0 (or above) so I can get into the Honors program, amin, and alhamdulillah so far so good :D

Signed,

Ainaa "Anthony-Bourdain-wannabe" Samsudin

When you are left with a big hole that used to be filled with something, you don't really want to leave it gaping right?

You think you can replace what was lost by something else. So you stuff and stuff that hole like a bottomless pit. Until someday maybe, someone can seal the hole for you and you will be complete again.

3 things in my life that I just can't live without.

1) Good food to eat

I ain't no Anthony Bourdain, but kalau tak sedap, I would rather go hungry

2) Pretty clothes to wear

I ain't no fashionista, but if its ugly, no way I am wearing it

3) Good music to entertain me

I ain't no musicologist, but if its bad, no way I will learn to love it

I guess I can't live without things that makes my life what it is

emotional constipation

Do you know how frustrating it is when you get the feeling to write something,

But you don't know how to say it out loud?

Rasa macam sembelit tau tak

We were like 2 linear lines with different slopes. We might have intersected at a point, but moving on our paths may never cross again as we head in different directions

muffled voice heard under the hood

light brushes of the coat

you know somebody's there beside you

in other words,

it's not cold because you are not alone

I played a song and realised

Is it the one you always sing to?

Dating, anyone?

My organic chemistry lecturer gave this analogy about entropy in class:

A + B -> C

this reaction is almost impossible and unfavourable, trying to put 2 chemicals together to form 1. It's like dating,

trying to put 2 people together with the right energy at the right time is almost impossible.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA yes, true that.

primal instincts?

I want a cat,

dog,

hamster,

goat,

python,

tortoise,

amoeba,

piano,

clothes & shoes,

etc

Or maybe I just want something that loves me back.

I have nothing to write about Canada these days. The constant downpour in Edmonton left me with almost nothing to reflect on. My thoughts have been washed away along with the rain.

Occasionally, there will still be some short sunny breaks. The heat dries up the rain and clears up my thoughts, causing some random outbursts of ideas here and there. But, nothing too significant or worthwhile to jot down.

Come winter I bet my thoughts and inspiration will be as frozen as the river.

mr. chauffeur

I don't drive.

But I've been in a lot of different cars this summer. 4, I think. Not including my parent's cars.

Cars are like 2nd homes. Like the decoration inside the house, the interior of the car has some personal touches too.

Or maybe I'm just a nosy person, snooping around the glove compartments until I find their personal stuff like sunglasses, perfume, hand lotion, cap, etc.

But there is one car that I remember the most.

Or mostly the quality time I had with the driver.

I can still remember how the interior smelled just like you.

Getting lost, or stuck in a jam is not so bad after all.

We make conversation with each other.

You can sing to me all those songs to that you think are so cool.

Some private 'us' time.

Not to mention all the motion sickness, menggelabah, and the mess I made in your car :)

So to my weekly dating chauffeur, thank you for all those Tg. Malim-Bkt Jelutong-KL trips.

My summer would be incomplete without you.

Of things II

Sometimes the heaviest thing is not the physical package,

But rather the emotional baggage attached to it

Shadow of my past

Headlights of zooming cars

Shaded by the nearby trees

A latern of leaves appear-

a glimpse of my baby night light

Of things

The truth is when I ask for physical things,

I attach feelings and emotions to materials that don't really matter

after reading my friend's post, I'd figure I should get ambitious too

2nd year to-do list:

1)cgpa: 3.0 (academic stuff like taking another music class, learn spanish, master organic chemistry)

2)take up another martial arts, or continue with muay thai kick-boxing

3)buy a 2nd-hand keyboard to practice piano

4)move (if there is a potential new housemate)

5)save up for NEW YORK and MONTREAL!!!

what addictive drug can alter your feelings, give you an euphoric high, makes you feel soooooo gooooood after having it, without any side effect?

music

no wonder i always feel better after an unhealthy dose of Lady Gaga and Beyonce.

pieces

Life is a puzzle.

There are some pieces that have been, and will always be there; family, God, pets...

Things you can't live without.

But there are some missing pieces that needs to be hunted; treasured friends, your other half, passions and interest...

Things that complete your puzzle.

Sometimes, people have big dreams with big plans to make the big bucks.

Why?

Because you think when you have the money,

you can wave those bills and watch their knees turn to jelly

growing up

As time pass by you begin to feel like you are no longer on the same page as others.

So you start building walls around you, only allowing a selected few to pass through. You can protect yourself from everyone else who disagrees with you.

Or maybe, all these while, the walls were already built by them. It takes time for you to realise that the reason why you never bump into them is because you keep bumping into their wall.

Or maybe, there is no such thing as walls. Only time can tell.

tumblr.

thoughts in pictures: ainaass.tumblr.com

thoughts in words: here.

Will still be blogging though. Just in 2 different ways

am currently practicing this song

fulamak, piano virtuoso in the making. konon lah. baru practice sikit macam ni dah lenguh jari.

the junk in my trunk

Bali, the aftermath

I still have sand in my hair

But I don't care!

these walls are not meant to keep people out

its created to keep people in

I'm Edmonton-sick already. Take me home please.

Home

Sunset ala Bukit Jelutong.

Tak romantic sungguh, macam kat padang pasir je

One week in Malaysia.

Where is the bus? That favourite #4 or #106 that has "West Edm Mall" flashing at the top?

What happened to the dry air? My clear (but flaky) skin?

The joy of talking in a language that no one else can understand?

The multicultural food?

I'm starting to miss Edmonton already.

No, what I think I really miss is

The freedom,

The independence,

The company,

The privacy,

The Zakwan.

I wish I can really say with all my heart: It's good to be home

it is not all about that 4.0 cgpa or that straight 10 As you know

experience,

personal fulfillment,

individual expression,

that's what you should get out of first year university

when was the last time you actually said:

"wow, I really enjoy that!"

believe me, I did studied as hard as I could. I did not want to drop out from that organic chemistry class. Do not judge me from my 2.7 cgpa.

keep your choice close,

but keep your options closer

after burping, I feel hungry again.

especially after eating nasi ayam

Henry Fuseli (1790)

When her attention started to shift from her muse to the incubus

She can still sleep, except without a smile on her face

good karma :)

daily mantra:

I am witty,

A little bit silly,

Not at all flabby,

And most importantly,

pretty.

(Sigh, so syok sendiri!)

I am a cat

I hate it when I have to go to the vet

The doctor pokes me with this and that

And tells me that I am fat :(

Back at home Ainaa will kiss me and give me a pat

Tells me how good I am at catching the rat

Lets me curl up on her warm mat

Coz I'm her favourite house cat :)

Crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside

Comment: 6 pax

Mental Note: I bet the muffin man's 6 pax is crispy on the outside, fluffy on the inside

this is too much for me to handle

Happy birthday Ainaa

when it is such a good weather outside,

even the circular cracks on the pavement start to resemble blooming roses

deprivation:

I guess I can't live without things

that make my life what it is

resemblance. they blow you away

no he doesn't

yes he does

no he doesn't

yes he does

no he doesn't

*holds handphone closer to laptop screen*

whoah, that's insane

I told you so. I know what you're thinking.

i find joy in automatic doors

they just...open!

as if there is a gentleman holding the door for you

don't you think so?

:)

it smells like spring

spring is in the air,

people are starting to bare-

and the hare,

they poop everywhere!

so you'd better beware!!!

of beethoven, mozart, and haydn

nak pergi Salzburg and Vienna (especially Vienna)

teringin nak pergi lereng bukit yang ber-backdrop pengembala kambing dan monasteries

sambil nyanyi:

The hills are alive with the sound of muuuuuusiiiiic

ala-ala Julie Andrews gitu

after all, they do have 'The Sound of Music Tour', 'Mozart Tour', 'Beethoven Tour' over there. betul deyh tak tipu! (tak caya gi google)

Bazinga

I start seeing Sheldon Cooper everywhere. or maybe because he's my favourite character from The Big Bang Theory.

I swear there is a guy in my music and kickboxing class that looks just like him.

Whenever I see him, I have to resist the urge to say "Awwwhhhh sweetie" or sing "Soft kitty, Warm kitty, Little ball of fur" just like how Penny does to him.

he's the tall skinny dude. the other one is leonard. this was from episode 1 season 1. nothing describes this 2 scientists better than this picture. and i don't mean it an obscene-show-your-underwear type of way.

The Fray

your voice made me melt that night

wavelengths

picture this:

a pinch of your croissant, a sip of my Pike Place Roast.

"nak cari kasut ni macam cari awek. jumpa yang lawa, tapi kalau tak kena, tak berkenan jugak"

A letter II

Dear God,

thank you for allowing me to be here to witness this wonderful change in season

p/s: I wish that this temperature lasts. Its cold enough to wear a coat, but warm enough to make your arm pits sweat.

Countless gratitudes,

Ainaa SS

i beg your pardon,

but it puzzles me deeply

why those men give this 'holier-than-thou' attitude

"Thou shalt not..." or "Thou must not..."

while those females will give this 'self-redemption' attitude

"Oh, forgive me, O..." or "Thy shalt..."

I might stereotyping. Therefore, I stand to be corrected. Prove me that I am wrong about this.

Breezes- invisible, yet always a welcomed presence

I'll be that wooooossssshhhh you're always smiling at

synesthesia

synesthesia: perceptual experience of one sense that is evoked by another sense.

Certain forms of synesthesia can be found in as many as 1 in every 100 people. Who knows, I might have one too :)

p/s:mini-documentary on synesthesia, in case if you're wondering what it is

Triumphs of Oriana

My favourite English madrigal from late Renaissance period (1601). Taken from 'The Triumphs of Oriana' (to anybody who buys me that CD, I will love you!) Am currently obsessed with classic music, thanks to my MUSIC 101 class.

iPad

if this baby is not enough to make you droooooool then you should replace Steve Jobs.

oh iPad, thy heart yearns for you!

toast gone wrong

In an attempt to toast bread using the oven (because I didn't buy a toaster)....

Yes, it caught on fire. Inside the oven.

That inflated black shiny thingy is the poor cheese.

I'm such a domestic goddess. Not.

day 1

Baru first day dah ada homework and kena ulangkaji for next week's quiz.

Pfftt thou art a heartless bitch

P/s: saya memerlukan cermin mata

However Someone Told Me

shut up and listen

Don't pretend that you are not mesmerised by her.

spaces

Place the wrong thing

At the wrong place

Can still fill a void

That I refuse to be left empty