Nathan Faith

February 2012

It seems like Nathan gives a primary talk at least once a month. He also frequently gives the article of faith during primary because he volunteers to do it for those who are missing. Memorizing comes easy to him and he grasps onto gospel principles so quickly. Though he is a child of great faith he still occasionally struggles with the extreme shyness that we saw in his first three years. Each time he has a talk we make it a point to get to church early so that he can practice in the primary room.

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Levi got his hair cut. It has been long for almost 2 years now and he did it short. Mostly because the girl he likes wanted to do it short and was the one cutting it. He was shy about it when he came out and I'm not sure he quite likes it yet but I love being able to see his eyes again.

After he got in the car and Nathan, Hyrum and I all complimented him on how great it looked, Nathan said to him, "are you going to start choosing the right and repent now?" Levi chuckled and replied, "maybe buddy". I love that about Levi. He may not have any intention on changing anything besides the hair but he doesn't argue with his little brothers over comments like this, he even encourages them in a way. He also didn't have his earrings in when he got in the car. Seeing his earrings was one of the reasons that I was nervous about the short hair. They just really don't seem to work on Levi. But, he didn't have them in when his little brothers saw him. He is very open about his opinions and choices but he is careful about what his youngest brothers see and hear from him. I appreciate that.

We drove Levi home and dropped him off. As he walked towards his building he turned around to wave again. I think he could feel me watching him. He is so good looking, so good hearted, so kind. His smile and eyes melt my motherly heart. I couldn't help but watch him for just a few minutes longer. He grinned in that knowing my-mommy-loves-me-way, waved again and walked in the door. As we drove off Nathan stated "I think our prayers are working, mom".

Nathan never forgets to pray for Levi. He uses his own phrases and changes them up frequently. Some of his latest prayers for Levi include, "that will find good friends; that he will make good choices; that he will remember that Jesus loves him; that he will remember that he is a child of God."

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We were doing a family home evening lesson on choices and the consequences that come from those choices - for good or bad. We were also briefly covering the atonement and how that helps us to correct wrong choices. After explaining the atonement in the simplest terms I could Nathan said, "it's just like Mrs. Parker says, do it nice or do it twice."
~Mrs. Parker is his Kindergarten teacher

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The little boys having a particularly hard time with each other one morning. I don't like you anymore, you're mean, you're not my friend anymore, go away . . . all the theme of their conversations. After trying to remind them about feelings, being like Jesus, choosing the right and finally leaving them to fight it out while I put some laundry in, Nathan came to me. He calmly stated that he had told Hyrum he still loves him even though he is being mean. He then asked me, "do you know why I did that?" Why? "Because of this" and he held up his middle finger. After a brief moment of shock wondering why my five year old was flipping me off, I realized that he was showing me his CTR ring. We hugged, I thanked him for choosing the right and told him I was sure Heavenly Father and Jesus were proud of him. He then looked at me very seriously and said, "we need to get Hyrum a CTR ring."

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After a brief boring spell following weekly parties at our house for some kind of holiday or birthday or social thing, Nathan seemed to be looking for a reason to party. Or so I thought. He asked when Harrison's birthday is. We looked it up from his kitten immunizations and figured out that he was born sometime in the first week of June. I thought he would be disappointed that we still wouldn't be having a party that week but I was put in my place when he declared with big eyes, "we need to plan his baptism." Nathan knows that Harrison is two years older than he is, which would mean our cat will be eight this year. I never imagined that I would need to teach a child why we don't baptize animals. His new eternal goal is to live with Heavenly Father and Harrison.

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During testimony meeting Nathan leaned over to inform me that he was going next. I've learned to never doubt his courage when it shows up but sometimes it does catch me off guard. When the person speaking finished, Nathan stood up and crossed in front of me only to turn around and sit down again. He looked up with pleading eyes. I asked him if he wanted me to go with him but reminded him that I wouldn't tell him what to say, I would just stand by him. He shook his head no, stating again that he would go up next. He really tried. I could almost see his giant spirit willing his nervous, socially quiet body to do it. After three attempts he finally whispered to me, "can I just tell my testimony to you?" So that week he did share his testimony. It was not the typical memorized child testimony that we hear so often but a few thoughts from Nathan on what he believes is right and true and what is important to him.

I am so blessed to know this amazing, wonderful son of God.

Favorites from Kahlil Gibran

On Children

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

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On Pain

Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain.
And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life, your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy;
And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always accepted the seasons that pass over your fields.
And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief.


Much of your pain is self-chosen.
It is the bitter potion by which the physician within you heals your sick self.
Therefore trust the physician, and drink his remedy in silence and tranquillity:
For his hand, though heavy and hard, is guided by the tender hand of the Unseen,
And the cup he brings, though it burn your lips, has been fashioned of the clay which the Potter has moistened with His own sacred tears.

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On Joy and Sorrow

Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.
And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.
And how else can it be?
The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.
Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?
And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?
When you are joyous, look deep into your heart and you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.
When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.

Some of you say, "Joy is greater than sorrow," and others say, "Nay, sorrow is the greater."
But I say unto you, they are inseparable.
Together they come, and when one sits, alone with you at your board, remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Verily you are suspended like scales between your sorrow and your joy.
Only when you are empty are you at standstill and balanced.
When the treasure-keeper lifts you to weigh his gold and his silver, needs must your joy or your sorrow rise or fall.

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Love that is washed by tears will remain eternally pure and faithful.