Do you ever stop and look at your life and wonder how in this world did you get where you are, what made you into who you have become, or how in this world are you so different than those whose genes you share but you are completely like a near perfect stranger?
A Little Background Info: My biological mother is a PSYCHO and my biological father has always been too busy with the wife and "their" child to bother getting to know me, so I was raised by my father's Sister (my Ree Ree) and her husband (Uncle Tim) {both of which I consider my parents and I'll refer to them as my mom and dad, and their son -Brad- as my brother.} From my biological father (the sperm donar) I have a brother and my biological mother (the womb donar) a sister, neither of which I have ever had much of a relationship with. At the ripe ole age of 19 I was crazy in love and I married the man of my dreams *ADAM* (today is our 6 year anniversary). I am in college and will graduate in May with a degree in Elementary Education. I eventually want to get my masters degree in Counseling. I have a large and very close nit family, sometimes you can feel the love overflowing and other times in a house full of people you'll never felt so alone. God is a HUGE part of my life... without him I WOULD BE NOTHING!
Soooo, with all of that said:
Sometimes I stop and think about the person I am today, and I cant help but think about the old debate Nature vs. Nurture. Nature is what is bred in you, your genes. Nurture is what happens to you, the way you learn to repsond and deal. I dont remeber much about the few years I lived with the womb donar, but my mom swares some things that come out of my mouth sounds just like her- this is sooooo not a good thing for me to hear, seeing as to how my greatest fear is becomming like her. But then I find out things the womb donar does and I just wish I had a lazer beam that would zap her off the face of the earth. She does things to purposely hurt people and that is so not me. She is evil! I honestly think the devil lives in her!!! We recently found out that my younger sister has a muscle disease and instead of comforting her... she hurts her. I am just not a person who would intentionally hurt someone, espically if they are already hurting. Im sorry you just dont kick a dog while its down! I try to care for the hurting. I feel like it is my mission in life help all of the lost hurting souls. The main reason I want to work with children is to be a positive role model for them so they can see that you don't have to be like the psychos who share your dna. you can rise above and be a better person. Thanks MOM for being my nurturer and loving me past the psycho's nature. With this I'll end my very first blog!
PS Im sure you think Im insane by now and the more postings I make will most likely confirm it...
