Thanksgiving X-travaganza

Thanksgiving was fabulous and fun! But I can't get my photos to load . . .

All of the Xanthos clan was here for Thanksgiving, except for Karlie. We certainly missed her! We did have a veggie Thanksgiving the Sunday before to get into the spirit of things.

We ate, thanked, played games, even danced, and enjoyed a wonderful week.

Extravaganzas

My sister pointed out that I am a sucker for extravaganzas, mostly because I use the word a lot. Really it is just a word I use to describe something I feel particularly excited about or something that is going on that seems a lot more special than our average day. I often conjure up extravaganzas in my mind, but occasionally this results in me trying to make a huge cake or cram too many things into one day.  So "extravaganza" has become part of our family lingo. Don't you love family lingo?

I also have an ongoing fantasy about putting on a real extravaganza.

It seems we also use the word to indicate the following:

1) Making a mountain out of mole hill. I am good at this. Basically I say this to poke fun at myself sometimes.
2) Me becoming visibly excited.
3) Thinking and talking about how much fun something is going to be such as saying, "wouldn't it be fun if we . . ."

We've had a few extravaganzas around here and I can't wait to tell you about them!

Karate

 Adrian started karate earlier this year. He was incredibly excited and has been 

wanting to take karate for so long.

They are learning the basic skills and talk a lot about discipline, obedience, and self control. When the teacher calls out to the class, they stand as straight and still as possible and yell, "yes ma'am!" Adrian gets totally into it and takes it very seriously!

He absolutely loves his class. I love how much he enjoys it and seeing his beaming smile when he gets to try out his new moves.

Nora is disappointed that she can not be in karate. Maybe when she is older. But she wears an old karate costume faithfully to each lesson. She likes to tell people she is going to "karate dancing class."

I can't find the stockings . . .

Right about now every year I start getting anxious and scatter-brained. I begin wishing I had started months ago on Christmas and on getting that family photo taken. And then I panic a little (I know, silly) when I realize that we will not have a decent photo to send with a Christmas greeting because we won't be with Karlie before the holidays and all our other attempts are not on a couch in the middle of  a field; you know, not that great. That and I refuse to be in most photos we send out. Then I think about all the grading that is ahead of me until right before Christmas and look at my completely trashed, kind-of-decorated-for-the-holidays house and wonder how? How am I going to pull this Christmas thing off and be peaceful and jolly? 

 

(Best photo with all 7 of us. Check out the lovely back drop, grill, kitchen rug, and all. At least Nora is not eating the stuffed snake in this one. Do not be surprised if you see this photo again this month.)

Then I think, what Christmas greeting? A letter to my family and friends detailing how I have  most likely actually gained weight since Eve was born and how Theo has been a handful this year and I don't quite know what to do, and how Adrian thinks that letters should have jet packs on them. Oh, and how Nora did not grow much. And how our car was totaled. And how we work all the time in hopes of making up for the last two years. And how Adrian had cavities. And how I wear the same pair of jeans everyday. And how I don't have cute stockings with my kids' names neatly sewn on them, but rather those cheap, fuzzy, red ones. And how I am very impatient.

But then I think of my wonderful family and friends. Of my beautiful, funny, amazing (cavities and all) kids. And by now we all know that perfection does not exist. And that's not what it is about. What is different this year is that I am not concerned about getting everything done. What matters is the time I spend with people I love. And those loved-ones I will not see are constantly on my mind.

I have been thinking a lot lately about how lucky I am to have the family and friends that I do.

To anyone reading this blog, thank you for being a part of my life. You most likely know me pretty well if you have stopped by here. So many of you have profoundly impacted me. You have no idea.

Have a wonderful, memorable, and happy holiday season! Cheap, fuzzy stockings and all!

Eve Josephine

Eve Josephine Xanthos was born on Saturday, August 14 at 1:16 a.m.

Yes, that was two months ago and now she has chubby legs and loves to coo. But, I am already feeling nostalgic for the day she was born, those wide newborn eyes, squished nose, and the hours that turned to days of holding and feeding and shooshing. Instead of the anticipation I felt for the next stage with my other babies, I am almost sad to see her get older because she will most likely be our youngest child. That and her birth was amazing and the first couple of months have been wonderful.

I know this is long. But I had fun remembering.

Evie was officially 9 days overdue; her original estimated arrival date was August 5th. I had convinced myself she would be born earlier, maybe end of July. No reason, just decided it. So when August 5th came and went with absolutely no signs of labor, I already felt like she was never going to arrive. During the week after her due date, not only did I feel really good, I did not have a single contraction. Not even the Braxton Hicks contractions I been experiencing a lot leading up to the due date. At my doctor's appointment on her due date, I was 2 cm dilated and 70% effaced. A week later (August 12) I was 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced. I saw a different doctor on the 12th, and she explained how subjective determing effacement is. I tried numerous things that people suggest can start labor, including having the  membranes stripped twice. My conclusion is that these methods do not work (unless it is truly time for baby to come) and are a waste of time.

During the 9 days after her due date, I tried not to complain because I had decided against an induction and to wait for labor to begin on its own. I believe there is no right way for a woman to have her baby, and elective inductions work well for most if not all people who choose this route, but I felt very strongly about not being induced unless it was medically necessary. My main reason behind my strong feelings to not induce is related to Theo's difficult labor and delivery and an injury he sustained at birth that I associate with pitocin use and "forcing the issue." Labor was not induced with Theo, but when things were not "progressing" as the doctor wanted, they started the pitocin. My current doctor has assured me that my experience with my first baby would not be repeated and that the correlation between the difficulty Theo and I had and the use of pitocin was not related (he says it has more to do with his position right before he was born), the physical therapy and a future surgery for Theo has been enough for me to not want to find out.

What made me even more determined to not undergo induction was that my obstetrician's nurse tried to tell me that labor must be induced on Monday, August 9 because I would be 4 days overdue and that could pose risks to the baby. When I pressed her to explain the actual risks of a 4-day overdue, healthy  pregnancy, she sad that is would just be better because my doctor was going out of town and would not be back until the following Monday. She said that if I were not induced and had not had the baby, that would put me over a week overdue by the time he returned and she did not want me to "slip through the cracks." When I asked exactly how I would slip through the cracks (I was imagining a hugely pregnant woman and a tiny crack in the floor), she said she just meant that I would need to see one of his associates instead and have a couple of non-stress tests done while I waited. Okay, I said.

The biggest disappointment about being overdue was that Karlie was not there when Evie was born. I was so excited for all of us to be together and had not considered that she would not be here! She returned to Indiana on Saturday, August 7 (so the induction would not have happened anyway) to get ready for her big return to school for her senior year. She started her senior year on August 10th!!! She has no idea how much I enjoyed her company in the couple of weeks before she left. Because I was taking it easy, we enjoyed some quality down time and she even went on a 4-mile walk with me a couple of days before the due date. She let me ramble on about her important stage in life, blah, blah, blah. Come to think of it, she went on a similar walk when I was due with Nora.

Early morning on Friday, August 13th I had a few strong contractions that faded. Later that day, I had very short, irregular, uncomfortable contractions. Terry and I took the kids out for Chinese food and I started having painful, still very short, contractions during dinner and decided to go outside and walk around. And frankly the food was making me sick. It was hard to decide how far in labor I was because the contractions were so short (strong, but short). I didn't think such short contractions could be real. Terry took Theo and Nora to Target for a special blanket Theo had been wanting to buy the baby. Adrian and I went home and soon after returning home, the contractions were getting intense.

Early in my pregnancy I had decided that I would stay home as long as possible while in labor. I prepared myself with a lot of reading up on different relaxation and pain management techniques but unfortunately did not do much practicing. I found that what little I had done was helpful though. By 10 p.m. the contractions were amazingly intense and increasingly close together, but still short. Of course this was the only time in a week I had really been alone in the house, so I called Terry and my in-laws to let them know things seemed to be moving along. Hurry! Anyway. . . we finally hit the road for the hospital at midnight. While in the car, the contractions began coming one on top of the other and I told Terry I thought things were starting to happen fast. He decided to speed and was pulled over by a police officer, which was very exciting for him. The cop did not give Terry a ticket and followed us the rest of the way to the hospital.

When we arrived at the hospital I was 8 + cm dilated and things were moving along quickly. What surprised me was that my contractions were never longer than 30 seconds, and most were less. I always thought they had to be much longer. Apparently not if you've had other babies. The anesthesiologist showed up during transition and enticed me with a spinal (a one time shot of anesthesia in the spine ). Go for it, I said, if I can sit still! As soon as he finished (which took a little while because of my squirming), the nurse said I was fully dilated and I could tell Evie was ready to be born. I did have some numbing for the delivery. My nurse had been wonderful and helped a lot with coaching me during the contractions, especially through transition. 

Here we are talking with the wonderful nurse. I think she was telling the story of the couple that asked for the placenta and made it into a shake. Evie was born about 15 minutes later. 

My sister Callie and sisters-in-law Ashley and Ellen were also there for moral support. It was fun having them there!

My doctor was a comedian (my regular doctor was still out of town) and kept saying thinks like, "you are going to have to push again because this is not a small baby!" and "wow, she has broad shoulders (and she does)!" etc. She weighed 9 pounds, but I fully expected a bigger baby the way he was going on and on.

Less than an hour after we arrived at the hospital, our little baby was born! She is amazing!

Passing along a heartwarming story

I am passing along the story of the amazing charitable efforts of my good high school friend, Tiffany Nelson Bergman. She and I had great times in Spanish class and on the cross country running and skiing teams. Tiffany always had a smile on her face and a kind word to say. Reading about her preparations (they will be giving up a lot!) to begin her journey and what they will be doing have warmed my heart.

She, her husband, and two adorable daughters will be serving for two years with Mercy Ships, a global charitable organization that primarily provides free, life-changing surgeries to those who cannot afford them and would most likely never receive them. These surgeries correct conditions for which people have often become outcasts and include: cataract surgery, club foot repair, vesicovaginal fistula repair, cleft lip/palate repair, and other repair of disfigurement and tumor growth.

Please go to her blog to read about what they are doing. I think she will warm your heart too.

Her story uplifts me in so many ways and particularly got me thinking about what it would be like to get rid of most of our "stuff."

"Stuff" just seems to get more credit than it deserves! Over the past couple of weeks, I have been trying to get rid of stuff and can't stop asking myself why we have so much junk! Material things not only require money, but they take up space, get broken and need to be fixed, get old and need to be disposed of, and somehow take on unnecessary importance. And then it seems we need "better stuff." All of this just complicates lives and crowds out more important things. They crowd time, the mind, the heart, and our physical space. Needless to say, I am trying to find balance with "stuff," and sometimes feel like the "stuff" is winning . . .

Hello There!

I had given up on blogging, but for the sake of keeping up with our family and friends, many who live too far away, I want to give it another shot. 

(My mom with kids at the local snow cone stand, a favorite hang out this summer. 

She kindly rode bikes there a few times during her recent visit.)