...
____it keeps bugging me
Stuck in the middle of nowhere.
I know what is the reality that awaits me..I know what are the possible solutions n outcomes. With the way it is now I dun think it'll be any different in time to come.
Mum keeps putting stress on me, throwing all those negativity of high probability at me. Not that I don't realise it yet, I got my reasons. But I doubt she'll agree to them.
She has expectations for me. Reasonable ones. Yet Im nothing more than disappointment.
It has to be me. It's my life. Like bon jovi said.
____me, so it's us too
It's not a good situation we're in. Maybe it is fine now but it's not going to be fine if this is how far we can get.
Survive, we can.. but don't want to just survive. I don't want you to just survive with me. I want to strive for the better future..for us. I don't want u to have to live to survive like I do. I'm not the best guy around but I want to let u live a better life..to take care of u without u worrying bout anything.
Saying it's fine n dun worry is not helping. The society n reality is slapping hard at me. I have to understand how dire the situation is going to be.
____actually, I need ur help
I need u to motivate me n guide me to the right path. I dun wanna take it slow..it'll soon be too late if I do so. I understand u need my attention from time to time. U want me to do things tgt with u..things that don't have to do with working or studying.. things that we just enjoy ourselves.
It would be great if we can do that all the time. But I can't. I feel guilty doing that, knowing that I should be working hard for the better living..or for now, to survive. If only I can forget about where I am.
I need u to know that u are my support. U can drive me forward, cause u are the main reason why I do things. I hope u drive me the right way.. dun let me slow down. I ought to be doing all I can now for the future. I don't think I have much time to waste.
____
I've been selfish. I always wanted to influence u for the better. I wanted u to be more independent. Well I tried. I didn't make it work.. I guess im not good at this. I couldn't help u to learn n understand.
Im lost. Somewhere.
Stuck in the middle of nowhere.
I know what is the reality that awaits me..I know what are the possible solutions n outcomes. With the way it is now I dun think it'll be any different in time to come.
Mum keeps putting stress on me, throwing all those negativity of high probability at me. Not that I don't realise it yet, I got my reasons. But I doubt she'll agree to them.
She has expectations for me. Reasonable ones. Yet Im nothing more than disappointment.
It has to be me. It's my life. Like bon jovi said.
____me, so it's us too
It's not a good situation we're in. Maybe it is fine now but it's not going to be fine if this is how far we can get.
Survive, we can.. but don't want to just survive. I don't want you to just survive with me. I want to strive for the better future..for us. I don't want u to have to live to survive like I do. I'm not the best guy around but I want to let u live a better life..to take care of u without u worrying bout anything.
Saying it's fine n dun worry is not helping. The society n reality is slapping hard at me. I have to understand how dire the situation is going to be.
____actually, I need ur help
I need u to motivate me n guide me to the right path. I dun wanna take it slow..it'll soon be too late if I do so. I understand u need my attention from time to time. U want me to do things tgt with u..things that don't have to do with working or studying.. things that we just enjoy ourselves.
It would be great if we can do that all the time. But I can't. I feel guilty doing that, knowing that I should be working hard for the better living..or for now, to survive. If only I can forget about where I am.
I need u to know that u are my support. U can drive me forward, cause u are the main reason why I do things. I hope u drive me the right way.. dun let me slow down. I ought to be doing all I can now for the future. I don't think I have much time to waste.
____
I've been selfish. I always wanted to influence u for the better. I wanted u to be more independent. Well I tried. I didn't make it work.. I guess im not good at this. I couldn't help u to learn n understand.
Im lost. Somewhere.
LX feel the groove @ 12:20 AM
| Sunday, August 02, 2009 |
Watching Shi Wei dance makes me speechless.
Its really proud for me to know such a great dancer and senior.
It's been a long tym since i laz met him face to face...i believe it was when i went baq to sg go collect my A lvls results, and i had a session with him. learning his choreo using Because of You by Ne-yo tgt with Jen Wei.
No doubt, he is a remarkable person.
He has been my inspiration. He is no ordinary dancer. He performs with so much passion & love...& charisma.
When he's onstage, he'll be the one shinning. There's no way u cant recognise him. He's juz too good. He's got smooth & slick moves. He's got power & explosive moves. and the way he dance thru his steps is juz magical...so nice, so smooth, so musical...
When he dances, u'll be pulled into his world, as if u can feel his heart dancing for real. He brings yer soul to the dance floor and make u dance with the him.
I respect him a lot for who he is. I never seen anyone like him.
He is a charismatic leader and a passionate dancer.
Under his guidance I have become a better dancer.
He lit my passion for dance.
He taught me how to perform.
He inspire me to move on to higher levels.
I always wanted to be like him. but I was never anywhere near his level.
He's a genius talent.
One of my biggest regrets for coming baq Msia to study is to lose contact with the so many dancers and so many exposures that I can possibly get in Sg.
Seeing my frens performing always make me feel happy for and proud of them cuz they are expressing the same passion that I have. It's as if Im performing with them. They carry the same passion that Im carrying.
Im wishing desperately that I can be physically there with them. I want to perform. I want to perform with yall so much. I wanna be dancing with u guys forever.
I hate that Im stuck here. I regret that I couldnt stay. Im guilty that I didnt try hard enough.
I really miss yall. Those day we had tgt, having practices tgt, performing tgt, chit chatting tgt...I miss them so much.
Now Im trying. Im trying hard to achieve what Shi Wei had achieved.
But I lack his charisma. I lack his leadership.
I want to inspire people like he does.
Even with the obstacles and challenges that I will face, I want to inspire others and be inspired.
Shi Wei, THANK YOU!
Thank you for the inspirational conversations you had with us.
Thank you for motivating us and pushing us to be better performers.
Thank you for the time you spent with us.
and I still want to thank you in the future.
You are my best inspiration & motivation
and you will always be.
Respect!
Its really proud for me to know such a great dancer and senior.
It's been a long tym since i laz met him face to face...i believe it was when i went baq to sg go collect my A lvls results, and i had a session with him. learning his choreo using Because of You by Ne-yo tgt with Jen Wei.
No doubt, he is a remarkable person.
He has been my inspiration. He is no ordinary dancer. He performs with so much passion & love...& charisma.
When he's onstage, he'll be the one shinning. There's no way u cant recognise him. He's juz too good. He's got smooth & slick moves. He's got power & explosive moves. and the way he dance thru his steps is juz magical...so nice, so smooth, so musical...
When he dances, u'll be pulled into his world, as if u can feel his heart dancing for real. He brings yer soul to the dance floor and make u dance with the him.
I respect him a lot for who he is. I never seen anyone like him.
He is a charismatic leader and a passionate dancer.
Under his guidance I have become a better dancer.
He lit my passion for dance.
He taught me how to perform.
He inspire me to move on to higher levels.
I always wanted to be like him. but I was never anywhere near his level.
He's a genius talent.
One of my biggest regrets for coming baq Msia to study is to lose contact with the so many dancers and so many exposures that I can possibly get in Sg.
Seeing my frens performing always make me feel happy for and proud of them cuz they are expressing the same passion that I have. It's as if Im performing with them. They carry the same passion that Im carrying.
Im wishing desperately that I can be physically there with them. I want to perform. I want to perform with yall so much. I wanna be dancing with u guys forever.
I hate that Im stuck here. I regret that I couldnt stay. Im guilty that I didnt try hard enough.
I really miss yall. Those day we had tgt, having practices tgt, performing tgt, chit chatting tgt...I miss them so much.
Now Im trying. Im trying hard to achieve what Shi Wei had achieved.
But I lack his charisma. I lack his leadership.
I want to inspire people like he does.
Even with the obstacles and challenges that I will face, I want to inspire others and be inspired.
Shi Wei, THANK YOU!
Thank you for the inspirational conversations you had with us.
Thank you for motivating us and pushing us to be better performers.
Thank you for the time you spent with us.
and I still want to thank you in the future.
You are my best inspiration & motivation
and you will always be.
Respect!
LX feel the groove @ 4:20 AM
| Friday, July 31, 2009 |
Dance club has been like a turbulence to me... fluctuating...
I like the way that the members are responding now.
it's wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy better than laz sem. yea...laz sem was like...err..
the practices are good. no big problem.
got them learning some pretty tough choreo tt i came out in the hour b4 the prac starts.. (haha)
n they've done a pretty good job catching up with it!
(actually i didnt realise the choreo was that tough when i was choreoing...)
hope that they'll perform it well. have faith in them.
but...some other part of the club isnt running as smoothly...
...aint sayin that out now.
hopefully the club will grow exponentially from here.
for now...all i wish is the commitment of my commitee members.
...and more hip hop dancers! :)
wanna be startin something soon...
people, pls behave! what's coming yer way will be a big wave.
******************************************************************
this is my calendar design for my Desktop Publishing II first assignment:
Yea, something lidat. its to be made into a cube.
didnt take a photo of the calendar cube b4 i submit it, so...too bad!
dunno why lor, this sem i've been using black n white for my DTP assignments...
my 2nd assignment not bad oso lor...
(costs my 50 bucks!!!! how can it be bad?? lol jk)
didnt take photo for tt oso.
but tt one take photo oso not good enough.
gotta see it and touch it to make it work.
Oh, btw that assignment is a poster design.
yessssss....a poster. that can animate!!!
haha
quite proud of that idea, but the finishing was flawed. not a 50 bucks outcome. T_T
this sem is pretty bad. with lotsa group assignments...
personally i prefer solo work. group work can be disastrous...and stressful, duh.
week 9 ending. week 10 coming. soon the sem will come to an end.
FASTER LA!!!
******************************************************************
sometyms i juz wonder, why cant i be a better person?
comparin myself to a more perfect fren of mine.
suddenly i feel soooooooooooo inferior.
feel like im nowhere near that level.
there's too much that im lacking.
all this tym, i've been followin a set of values and standards that i have...
but lately i realise that they may not be what i should have followed.
there are flaws in them. imperfections. errors.
...
somehow made me feel a lil lost.
...n here comes the pessimist me.
got me distracted lately.
with some conflicting emotions.
it juz made me feel worse.
tryin to get myself baq on track.
telling myself to stand strong n not lose myself.
telling myself to calm down n think again.
telling myself to let it go n i'll be alryt again.
...
stil...
I like the way that the members are responding now.
it's wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy better than laz sem. yea...laz sem was like...err..
the practices are good. no big problem.
got them learning some pretty tough choreo tt i came out in the hour b4 the prac starts.. (haha)
n they've done a pretty good job catching up with it!
(actually i didnt realise the choreo was that tough when i was choreoing...)
hope that they'll perform it well. have faith in them.
but...some other part of the club isnt running as smoothly...
...aint sayin that out now.
hopefully the club will grow exponentially from here.
for now...all i wish is the commitment of my commitee members.
...and more hip hop dancers! :)
wanna be startin something soon...
people, pls behave! what's coming yer way will be a big wave.
******************************************************************
this is my calendar design for my Desktop Publishing II first assignment:
Yea, something lidat. its to be made into a cube.
didnt take a photo of the calendar cube b4 i submit it, so...too bad!
dunno why lor, this sem i've been using black n white for my DTP assignments...
my 2nd assignment not bad oso lor...
(costs my 50 bucks!!!! how can it be bad?? lol jk)
didnt take photo for tt oso.
but tt one take photo oso not good enough.
gotta see it and touch it to make it work.
Oh, btw that assignment is a poster design.
yessssss....a poster. that can animate!!!
haha
quite proud of that idea, but the finishing was flawed. not a 50 bucks outcome. T_T
this sem is pretty bad. with lotsa group assignments...
personally i prefer solo work. group work can be disastrous...and stressful, duh.
week 9 ending. week 10 coming. soon the sem will come to an end.
FASTER LA!!!
******************************************************************
sometyms i juz wonder, why cant i be a better person?
comparin myself to a more perfect fren of mine.
suddenly i feel soooooooooooo inferior.
feel like im nowhere near that level.
there's too much that im lacking.
all this tym, i've been followin a set of values and standards that i have...
but lately i realise that they may not be what i should have followed.
there are flaws in them. imperfections. errors.
...
somehow made me feel a lil lost.
...n here comes the pessimist me.
got me distracted lately.
with some conflicting emotions.
it juz made me feel worse.
tryin to get myself baq on track.
telling myself to stand strong n not lose myself.
telling myself to calm down n think again.
telling myself to let it go n i'll be alryt again.
...
stil...
LX feel the groove @ 11:42 PM
suddenly feel an urge to post something. tho im busy doin work. haha
feel a lil lost these days. got kinda distracted by my emotions. got emo pretty easily these days.
haiz
getting very broke this week..
spend 50 bucks on printing my poster... for the animation effect.
den had 2 bdae celebration with my housemates.
now im dead broke.
way outta my week budget.
somemore haven pay my rent (i think)...
haiz.
life is not at best.
wish that it was always the old tyms.
missin my buddies madly.
4P'05 bros...NJ dance buddies...TJ 04/06 gang...n all others baq then whom i knew...
life really is not at best.
I'm startin to regret for not tryin to continue my tertiary in singapore.
I wanna live my life to the fullest.
Dun wanna live like a fool.
I wanna be better than this.
I dun wanna be stuck with almost no improvements like this.
Im getting a lil lost.
Wad am i goin to say now?
feel a lil lost these days. got kinda distracted by my emotions. got emo pretty easily these days.
haiz
getting very broke this week..
spend 50 bucks on printing my poster... for the animation effect.
den had 2 bdae celebration with my housemates.
now im dead broke.
way outta my week budget.
somemore haven pay my rent (i think)...
haiz.
life is not at best.
wish that it was always the old tyms.
missin my buddies madly.
4P'05 bros...NJ dance buddies...TJ 04/06 gang...n all others baq then whom i knew...
life really is not at best.
I'm startin to regret for not tryin to continue my tertiary in singapore.
I wanna live my life to the fullest.
Dun wanna live like a fool.
I wanna be better than this.
I dun wanna be stuck with almost no improvements like this.
Im getting a lil lost.
Wad am i goin to say now?
LX feel the groove @ 1:22 AM
| Monday, June 29, 2009 |
Happy Birthday to Jz, my lovely fren + housemate + classmate. She's fun. hahaha
Had a celebration for her at homw juz now. pretty high & fun.
Now that im holding an important post, i shall be starting a revolution. muahhahaha
start thinking alr ba
take action ba
the most important thing is stil to get the team tgt
shall i start choreo?
Had a celebration for her at homw juz now. pretty high & fun.
Now that im holding an important post, i shall be starting a revolution. muahhahaha
start thinking alr ba
take action ba
the most important thing is stil to get the team tgt
shall i start choreo?
LX feel the groove @ 1:02 AM
| Saturday, June 27, 2009 |
| Saturday, May 09, 2009 |
The previous post on Freestylz was on laz yesterday morning...
Actually i went to Genting with the GD2 peeps on tues. total of 8 people, 4 guys 3 girls & 1 boy - "girlgirl".
went there for fun, feel the wind, snap some shots, juz to have some tym tgt...
the haze was heavy tt day, making the weather so damn cool.
we snapped quite alot of fun shots... but not using my camera. so see more in our facebook. haha
not bad lor the trip. i managed to use only 3.50 bucks up there.
so all tgt with the transport fees i actually spent less than 25 bucks. haha
*************************************************************
our semester actually juz ended.
happy tt it ends, but sad tt some friends will be leavin to kampar and setapak.
I juz had some wonderful tym dancing and practicing with my fellas.
first tym, after so long, i feel tired from dancing.
first tym, after so long, i feel like im really dancing again.
I really enjoyed the prac. so im really glad to know u guys, Jestin & Wen Long.
but they're gonna leave for kampar next semester.
I juz hoped we've met earlier.
Tho setapak is juz an hour away from PJ, but i dun think we have tym to prac as often as we can if we're tgt.
But stil, we will dance.
"To touch, to move, to inspire.
That's the gift of dance."
Actually i went to Genting with the GD2 peeps on tues. total of 8 people, 4 guys 3 girls & 1 boy - "girlgirl".
went there for fun, feel the wind, snap some shots, juz to have some tym tgt...
the haze was heavy tt day, making the weather so damn cool.
we snapped quite alot of fun shots... but not using my camera. so see more in our facebook. haha
not bad lor the trip. i managed to use only 3.50 bucks up there.
so all tgt with the transport fees i actually spent less than 25 bucks. haha
*************************************************************
our semester actually juz ended.
happy tt it ends, but sad tt some friends will be leavin to kampar and setapak.
I juz had some wonderful tym dancing and practicing with my fellas.
first tym, after so long, i feel tired from dancing.
first tym, after so long, i feel like im really dancing again.
I really enjoyed the prac. so im really glad to know u guys, Jestin & Wen Long.
but they're gonna leave for kampar next semester.
I juz hoped we've met earlier.
Tho setapak is juz an hour away from PJ, but i dun think we have tym to prac as often as we can if we're tgt.
But stil, we will dance.
"To touch, to move, to inspire.
That's the gift of dance."
LX feel the groove @ 6:56 PM
Video shooting was tiring but fun.
Havin the chance to see how they do it is part of learning.
and i think i can begin to understand how tough is an artist's life when there's so many shootings they gotta go for...
I had the chance to chit chat with the Brand Manager of F&N.
It was a good experience.
He's a great person.
A knowledgeable thinking guy. He shared alot of stuff with us, and i enjoyed talkin to him.
He actually knows more stuff than me when it comes to dancin in malaysia. lol
I would like to thank some people for this opportunity.
F&N - for havin Freestylz
Essense Communications - for havin me to be part of this
- Edmund and his colleagues especially, for guidin me thru the process
My parents - for understanding me and allowing me to be in
Videographers - for the hours spent shootin and editin
Broadcasting seniors, Kevin's gang - for the first video shootin
I hope for the best at the launch.
I hope I can do myself proud.
check out fnfreestylz.com for info on Freestylz competition.
Havin the chance to see how they do it is part of learning.
and i think i can begin to understand how tough is an artist's life when there's so many shootings they gotta go for...
I had the chance to chit chat with the Brand Manager of F&N.
It was a good experience.
He's a great person.
A knowledgeable thinking guy. He shared alot of stuff with us, and i enjoyed talkin to him.
He actually knows more stuff than me when it comes to dancin in malaysia. lol
I would like to thank some people for this opportunity.
F&N - for havin Freestylz
Essense Communications - for havin me to be part of this
- Edmund and his colleagues especially, for guidin me thru the process
My parents - for understanding me and allowing me to be in
Videographers - for the hours spent shootin and editin
Broadcasting seniors, Kevin's gang - for the first video shootin
I hope for the best at the launch.
I hope I can do myself proud.
check out fnfreestylz.com for info on Freestylz competition.
LX feel the groove @ 6:31 PM
| Wednesday, April 29, 2009 |
talkin bout passion...
how passionate am i ryt now?
now ppl wanna video shoot my life to show my passion.
know wad?
i got nothing to show.
cuz its all bout me & myself dancin. tts all. will anyone feel anythin?
i try to find out why is this happening... i realise my passion did not start here. it started baq then in my junior college years where every practice and performance can be so happening and we all look forward to every single session and show.
tts how i would like to express my passion. not juz me, but us, as a team, as a crew.
after those years, im baq in malaysia. and frankly speakin i find it difficult to light up my passion. it is as if there is no energy to push the passion..
in my campus, there is hardly anyone who put in as much effort as i do to dance, i dare to say.
i dun even feel the existence of the dance club when only 2 ppl turn up during the practice sessions. this is never the way to dance.
and this is the f*ed up thing tt i really hate bout utar culture.
if u cannot commit in dance, dun even think bout starting a showcase!
if u cannot commit in dance, then stop wasting tym pissing ppl off!
if u cannot commit in dance, stop giving wrong impression and dun even act as if u can dance, cuz u cant, and u dun have the passion for it.
i was tryin to improve the situation here.
i've been tryin...but tryin is not enough.
no matter how hard i try, its like one sided. there's hardly any response.
im not big enough to make a change in the culture, i guess.
so, i've been more or less on my own for the past one year.
really, i hardly met anyone like myself.. who sees dance as life, who put dance in their top priorities. even if there are, they were never as committed as i hoped they would be.
if u wanna see more of my passion for dance, u can see it in my junior college years...not now.
im a soloist now. tho i've been trying to look for ppl to team up with...but...
there isnt much passion u can see around.
video me up is not a good idea at all.
instead, ask me bout how and wad i've done with my passion.
i would be more than delighted to share...
but this is not wad they wan. they wanna see it. not hear it. hence they shoot.
and it put me in a damn tough situation.
somemore timing is never ryt. first tym was laz minute during a study week weekend, now its halfway during the exam period. i said im fine with this, but tt doesnt mean my frens are fine with it. especially when i need them to help me out with this shooting.
the thing is, u wont see my passion in juz one day. tts ridiculous.
even if yer gonna follow me whole n see wad i do, ppl will juz feel tt its some fake stuff cuz who the hell would start popping and toprocking halfway walking on the street? normal ppl gonna think this is so fake.
but tts wad i do.
its juz ridiculous to imagine ppl posting videos on youtube with title like "passionate dancers" and shows some dancers juz dancin. yea, we can see tt they can dance, but can we see the passion?
...c'mon...its not something tt can be seen...
dulan nah...
die liao la, dunno where to find dancers to dance with me for the video...
**************************************************
Putting those things aside, i found this choreographer Ask Ali. i like his style!!
check it out
how passionate am i ryt now?
now ppl wanna video shoot my life to show my passion.
know wad?
i got nothing to show.
cuz its all bout me & myself dancin. tts all. will anyone feel anythin?
i try to find out why is this happening... i realise my passion did not start here. it started baq then in my junior college years where every practice and performance can be so happening and we all look forward to every single session and show.
tts how i would like to express my passion. not juz me, but us, as a team, as a crew.
after those years, im baq in malaysia. and frankly speakin i find it difficult to light up my passion. it is as if there is no energy to push the passion..
in my campus, there is hardly anyone who put in as much effort as i do to dance, i dare to say.
i dun even feel the existence of the dance club when only 2 ppl turn up during the practice sessions. this is never the way to dance.
and this is the f*ed up thing tt i really hate bout utar culture.
if u cannot commit in dance, dun even think bout starting a showcase!
if u cannot commit in dance, then stop wasting tym pissing ppl off!
if u cannot commit in dance, stop giving wrong impression and dun even act as if u can dance, cuz u cant, and u dun have the passion for it.
i was tryin to improve the situation here.
i've been tryin...but tryin is not enough.
no matter how hard i try, its like one sided. there's hardly any response.
im not big enough to make a change in the culture, i guess.
so, i've been more or less on my own for the past one year.
really, i hardly met anyone like myself.. who sees dance as life, who put dance in their top priorities. even if there are, they were never as committed as i hoped they would be.
if u wanna see more of my passion for dance, u can see it in my junior college years...not now.
im a soloist now. tho i've been trying to look for ppl to team up with...but...
there isnt much passion u can see around.
video me up is not a good idea at all.
instead, ask me bout how and wad i've done with my passion.
i would be more than delighted to share...
but this is not wad they wan. they wanna see it. not hear it. hence they shoot.
and it put me in a damn tough situation.
somemore timing is never ryt. first tym was laz minute during a study week weekend, now its halfway during the exam period. i said im fine with this, but tt doesnt mean my frens are fine with it. especially when i need them to help me out with this shooting.
the thing is, u wont see my passion in juz one day. tts ridiculous.
even if yer gonna follow me whole n see wad i do, ppl will juz feel tt its some fake stuff cuz who the hell would start popping and toprocking halfway walking on the street? normal ppl gonna think this is so fake.
but tts wad i do.
its juz ridiculous to imagine ppl posting videos on youtube with title like "passionate dancers" and shows some dancers juz dancin. yea, we can see tt they can dance, but can we see the passion?
...c'mon...its not something tt can be seen...
dulan nah...
die liao la, dunno where to find dancers to dance with me for the video...
**************************************************
Putting those things aside, i found this choreographer Ask Ali. i like his style!!
check it out
LX feel the groove @ 11:06 AM
