Finding my sound...

Lately I have been CRAVING music.  It could be described as an almost unquenchable hunger for music.

The funny thing is for quite a long time before this, I honestly haven't really enjoyed music.  I tolerated it, but it didn't really move me.  I was fairly apathetic toward.  I could take it or leave it just as well.

Lately I have been reminded how powerful and enjoyable music really can be though.  It feels as though I am tasting music for the very first time.  Almost as if I were waking up from some slumber and listening again for the very first time.

I'm kinda picky about the sound though.  It has got to be something upbeat and alive.  Something that makes you want to dance and sing.  But it needs to be passionate and powerful too; it can't be something that is easily forgotten as soon as it is over.  And yes words are important too.  I guess it would be easy to sum it by saying I am looking for music which glorifies God AND helps me to enjoy Him more.

But that doesn't mean the songs must be only about worship in the literal sense either.  I think songs about life are beautiful too.  Songs about love and sadness.  Songs about children and work.  These aren't UNchristian.  My entire life is supposed to be an act of worship.  That includes everything... from the mundane to the beautiful.

Day 4...

Al got home exhausted last night at 3am (which is quickly once again becoming his typical hours). I didn't sleep well either.

So when I woke this morning with a headache, I was also very tired and grouchy! And my attitude was honestly terrible... I don't LIKE 2nd shift and the longer Al is stuck on it, the more I am reminded at how much I DISLIKE it! I just want to go back to dayshift ASAP!

We are all exhausted. Completely switching our sleep schedule immediately without any warning has been exceptionally difficult. And we all look like zombies walking around here. Frankly my flesh doesn't WANT to try to be joyful, let alone thankful...

These were my thoughts, struggles, and attitudes this morning, but I was gently reminded that I am trying to manage this transition in my own strength and I am NOT relying on the One who gives me strength.

I  KNOW this too shall pass. I KNOW we can and will make it through this, but it is still very hard. What I know and what I feel were in definite conflict today.

I told my husband all this before he left for work this afternoon.  I knew all of this in my head, but today my heart just needed a little hope.

Just a little while later, I received an email with some more work for me that needed to be finished as soon as possible.  Strange and as illogical as it may be, this was exactly what I needed to encourage me today.  It was just a little bit of normal.  And something I could easily accomplish and check off of my list of things which need done.

Tonight thankfully my attitude is greatly improved.

And tonight I am truly thankful...
... thankful for my husband's job
... thankful that my husband gets to come home each night
... thankful that we get to spend some time together each day
... thankful for the work God is doing in our lives right now
... thankful for God's provision in work I can do from home
... thankful for all my beautiful children
... and thankful that God still loves me and cares for me even when I am having a bad day!

Please pray that God would continue to give us the grace and strength in the midst of this challenging time.

Busy, Busy, BUSY

Life has been busy lately.

Between Christmas and New Years's we had a lot of fun activities with family and friends keeping us busy.  Then Al had to work last weekend.

I thought things would start to settle back into normal this week, but I was certainly wrong on that one...

This week I got S.W.A.M.P.E.D with work.  It was challenging but I managed to get all caught up tonight.  My dear husband helped out this week by cooking supper for me.  And the extra work this week was very obviously just one more way in which God was providing for our family... another unexpected blessing for which we have thanked and praised Him.

On Wednesday, Al found out he was going back to second shift... on Thursday.  No notice. No adjustment period.  Just drastic and sudden.  We are hoping and praying this is very short-term while they find a new manager for the shift.  But we trust this too is in God's hands.

So this week has so far turned out NOTHING like I planned, but we know that it is exactly what He planned.  And His ways are much wiser than mine!