And Then You Were Three

Dear Carder,

Time has been flying by so quickly since you joined our lives.  It really seems like just yesterday that I awoke in the middle of the night when my water broke - but it really was 3 years ago.  I cannot believe how quickly you have been growing or how full you make my life.

So much about your personality has emerged in this last year.  You have a wonderful sense of humor and you love to laugh.  Whether it is because your toy falls off of an object over and over again or whether it is because you have made yet another poop joke, your laughter is like music and it makes me smile.

You still give the best hugs, hands down.  You wrap your arms around our necks and squeeze and make the best "Umm-umm" sound while you do it.  And you can squeeze quite hard.  :)  You still love to snuggle up to us pretty much any chance you get and I hope it stays that way for a while.

You have made some new friends in Wisconsin and your ability to share and take turns is growing each day.  You still have to be reminded sometimes, but I think that considering you are an only child starting over in a new place, you do quite well.

It seems like overnight that your stranger anxiety as faded away.  One day you were clinging to my side at the mall and the next you were running full speed ahead away from me.  One day you were hiding your head on my shoulder when a stranger spoke to you at the grocery store and now you walk up to them and shake their hand and offer your name and age and whatever random thing is currently on your mind.  As much as it makes me happy to see you bloom, this change has been a scary one for me as I am constantly nervous that you will be snatched up by some stranger.  Based on your daddy's idea based on Finding Nemo and the diver who took Nemo away from his daddy, we now warn you of "DIVERS" in public and you typically come back pretty quickly.  Thank goodness.

Your vocabulary astounds me - we have complete conversations about all kinds of things and you string together so many words that I don't count anymore.  You ask insightful questions (about the world around you, about how things work, about death, about pretty much anything you could think of) and most people that meet you think you are at least 4.  You constantly ask "Why?"  and  "When I get bigger, can I do XYZ?"

You sing ALL.THE.TIME.  Loudly.  And you make up songs about things that you see around you.  I have had people comment on your singing talents in the grocery store more than once.

We read several books every day.  You go in search of specific books in your collection and find them pretty quickly.  You can even "read" the books to me - I love to hear you read "The Monster at the End of the Book".  You can say your alphabet and can recite numbers into the 30s but you like to skip some numbers in the teens.  You also recognize quite a few letters and numbers but working on recognition has been a bit tough as you get frustrated - you want to be able to form each one PERFECTLY and when something isn't just right, you don't like it one little bit.  (I think you get that from both your mommy and your daddy.) 

You help around the house and love to help me cook.  You actually helped me to make the cupcakes that we had on your actual birthday.

You love to play with trucks and balls and your dogs (although "play" could be translated into chase and choke).  You love to ride your scooter or run around the block.  You love to jump and climb and you challenge us to try to do what you can do.  You love to dig in the dirt and play in the sand and try to pick up bugs.  You have started a rock collection. 

You are such a sweet little boy and I am so glad you are a part of our family.  It wouldn't be the same without you.  We love you!

Mommy and Daddy

I Didn't Fall Off the Face of The Planet...

Just moved our family several hundred miles...

Yes, you read that right.  We have moved - to a new state no less.  It has been a whirlwind.

There has been so much that has happened in our lives since the last time that I posted and I have so many feelings and things that I want to share with anyone who may still be reading this (rarely updated) blog.

But I guess rather that backdating and trying to get the space caught up, I should start with the most recent and biggest things.

Towards the end of 2013, Derek started being "courted" by some recruiters.  This had happened several times during our lives in Michigan, but this time Derek was ready for a career change.

After a couple of grueling months of interviews and a couple of very stressful weeks with 3 on site interviews in 3 different states (and the stress of the timing of the offers that followed), Derek accepted a position with a company in Wisconsin.  (Sorry, MG, Cali didn't win...)

The next weekend, we went on a house hunting trip and found a house we fell in love with.  And after downsizing from our house in GA to fit into our house in MI, we somehow decided to buy an even smaller house in WI - but it has some really cool features and it is in an awesome neighborhood with a great school district, so I feel like it was the right move for us.

Days later, we had our house in show ready condition (which was a HUGE success considering the fact that Carder was living in the house during the time we were preparing to list).  We priced ourselves competitively as we knew we didn't want to sit on the market indefinitely.  The house hit the market and we had a TON of interest - 15 or so showings in the first few days.  2 offers in the first 48 hours. 

And before I knew it, Derek had left for Wisconsin and Carder and I were left to pack up the rest of our lives in Michigan over the next 2 weeks.  We had a few play dates and also got to spend some quality time together having fun.  I spent naps and after bedtime sorting through boxes and rounding up things to be donated and posting things that wouldn't be making the cut onto Craigslist.  The movers arrived last Monday to pack up our belongings in to boxes, the truck was loaded on Tuesday.  By last Wednesday, we were all in Wisconsin.

We are currently living in a hotel and won't be moving into our house until mid-May.  That kind of stinks, but it could be worse I suppose.

During the last week, we have spent time finding our way around our new city and doing some fun things.  I have spent nap time getting the things done that you have to do when you move to a new state and buy a new house.

I will probably try to do some updates over the next week or so (before I am back to spending naps and after bedtime getting settled into our new house).  Please check back to see the other things that have been happening in our lives lately.

Pumpkins 2013

Last year, October was a cold and rainy month and it was hard for us to find the right weekend to go to a pumpkin patch.  This year, the weather has been much more cooperative!  Saturday would have been a gorgeous day (over 70 degrees and sunny) to have gone, but we were having a garage sale and were tied to the house. 

 

Instead, we chose to go on Sunday.  The weather was cooler and much more fall-like.  It was overcast, so I missed the sunshine, but we still had a great time.

 

We went to one of the local Pumpkin Patches that advertised pumpkins, apples, a farm stand, a corn maze, and a petting zoo.  They had lambs, pigs, and chickens for the kids to attempt to pet, so we knew there would be at least one activity that Carder would love.  After a couple of visits to the sheep pen, Carder got to pet the lambs.  The pigs were quite lazy and spent most of their time snoring, although they did get up and route in the mud for some apples before we left.  But the real prize of the day was the chickens.  This was the first time Carder had seen chickens that were not in a pen.  After watching another little boy try, he spent the longest time chasing the chickens around the yard trying to catch them.  I wowed him with my ability to get close to the chickens by showing him to stand very still and hold an empty corn cob.  He was amazed that the chickens came right up to try to peck off the corn.  But apparently tricking the chickens isn't as fun as catching them because he went right back to running after them.

 

After seeing the animals for a while, Derek decided that it was time to try out the fresh pumpkin donuts and hot apple cider.  Delicious.

 

And then we tried to get Carder to pose for pictures in the pumpkins.  He was much more interested in the donuts and cider than in smiling at the camera.  So we I finally gave up on the perfect pumpkin picture and instead we searched for the perfect pumpkins.  We gave Carder free reign in picking out the ones he wanted and ended up with 4 pumpkins - a couple of really big ones, a medium one, and a small one.

 

Carder wasn't the biggest fan of the "scarecrows" - life sized hay stuffed clothing with milk jug heads...he eyed them suspiciously for quite a while and never got too close to them.  Those painted on smiles didn't fool him for one second.  He finally did get close enough to inspect that they were really stuffed with hay.

 

Another super fun activity that we didn't expect was a maze out of square hay bales for the smaller kids.  Carder was still a little young to understand the concept of thinking his way through the maze, so I quickly abandoned that idea and just let him play as he saw fit.  This consisted of climbing up onto the hay, jumping from bale to bale, jumping off the hay...He would throw his arms in the air and victoriously shout "I MADE IT" and other times he would tell us he was "working on his house"...

  

We were able to get this great family picture in the hay maze.  It is probably one of my favorite pictures of the 3 of us together.  

 

Since Carder is now my "little helper", I knew that carving pumpkins would be a challenge this year as I was sure he would want to have his turn to cut the pumpkins.  I found a great set of stickers at the dollar store that I thought might be a good solution.  When I first bought them, I thought that we would still carve a pumpkin and just let Carder help to clean out the inside.  But the stickers were such a success that I decided to just let him do all 4 pumpkins in stickers and we won't be carving one this year.  (We have the Styrofoam one that I carved last year that we will light up on Halloween night so I am totally fine with this plan.)

Here is Carder with his pumpkins.  And yes, he has a "mustache".  He had done Face Time with Grandpa earlier and had to have one...

Wordless Wednesday - Shawshank Edition

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday - Shawshank Edition

 

I am sure you have seen Shawshank Redemption, right?  If not, you should.  Great movie...

Well, we are beginning to think that Carder is like Andy Dufresne, but instead of trying to break out of jail, it is apparently the day care.

His favorite hobby is totin' sand out of the exercise yard a handful at a time.  Only he seems to end up with it in his shoes.  

And brings it home.

And dumps it out all over the couch or the floor...

Here is photographic evidence:

My God at the sand!  Seriously, do they have any left at the play ground?

One of these days the warden will call is and tell us he vanished like a fart in the wind and that they found a big hole in the wall behind a Sesame Street poster...

Wordless Wednesday - Sleeping With Daddy Edition

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday - Sleeping with Daddy Edition

 

Since I get up before the boys, I often get to marvel at the two of them sleeping.  I find it really interesting that they are often in similar positions...here are just a couple of recent examples...

 

 

(Also, you may or may not have noticed that I posted quite a few backdated posts yesterday...I am trying my hardest to get this space caught up!)

 

 

 

 

Decisions, Decisions...Comments Appreciated

I have a decision to make.  I just got a reminder from my phone that it is time to call and schedule my annual exam with my OBGYN.  And the same day that happened, AF arrived.

Even though I used to absolutely flood this space with TMI about my monthly cycles and our procreation attempts, I have been pretty quiet about it since Carder's arrival.

I know I have mentioned this before, but just in case anyone missed the posting:  Derek and I have decided not to pursue further fertility treatments.  Our disposable income drastically decreased when we moved to Michigan and we would rather use the money to spoil the one child we have.  We aren't "close" to a fertility treatment center.  Since it would be a new clinic, we may be required to do a fresh cycle before we would qualify for embryo adoption.  We are both over 35 and having the energy to chase after a little one (who still doesn't sleep all the way through the night in his own bed) is hard enough without adding a second child (or even more with ART in the mix).  Any resulting pregnancy would probably land me on bed rest due to a premature birth with our first child.  Anyway, you get the picture.

Although I would LOVE another child and I often get very sad when thinking that I will never get to experience all of the joy another child would bring, we won't be going down the path that would be the most likely to result in another child.  Instead, I have been crossing my fingers for a "miracle" pregnancy and hoping to become "that woman" that everyone keeps telling all of the other Infertiles about.

Yeah, I know...not very likely.  I would have better chances of winning mega millions in the lottery.

So this leads me to my decision that needs to be made.

To Birth Control or Not to Birth Control, that is the Question.

Last year, Dr. M and I decided that since we wouldn't be disappointed with a miracle pregnancy, we would be better off leaving BC out of the mix.

This year, I am not so sure.  AF has gotten to be a total bitch.  Before Carder, I had heavy flow and what I considered to be major cramping with the occasional migraine and IBS flare up thrown in the mix.  Now, I still get the heavy flow.  And I get severe cramping (that almost feels like back labor).  And in 7 out of the last 8 cycles I have gotten a severe migraine.  And most months I get an IBS flare up as well.  And now I sometimes get some random heavy spotting a few days before AF arrives.  (This, of course, leads the hopeful infertile to always wonder if it could possibly be implantation bleeding.)  Joy, joy.  Multiple curse words strung together.  Oh, and I have short cycles so this happens every 25ish days.  More multiple curse words strung together.

So first of all - am I the only one who has suffered a drastic change in menstrual cycles after childbirth?  Does anyone have any similar personal experience to share?

I don't know if there could be something related to having a Cesarean delivery that would cause a change in my cycles (scar tissue?  adhesions?  endometriosis?) or if it is changes in my hormone levels as I age that just signal my body is getting older?

Regardless, I think it is time to have the conversation with Dr. Marvelous about what the next step is.  And it may be time for me to throw the last bit of optimism and hope (regardless of how small that % of likelihood) that we will ever have another child out of the window.  And to be honest, that thought makes me very sad.

But as I sat in the floor of Carder's room last night doing our bedtime routine trying to decide if I was about to puke from the migraine or pass out from the back pain, I realized that spending a couple of days each cycle dealing with this crap just so I could UNSUCCESSFULLY ATTEMPT to defy the odds and get that miracle baby just might not be worth it anymore...

Any comments that you might have would be appreciated.

Also, I know I am WAY behind on posting and I have multiple draft posts that I will be flooding the internets with soon.

Cherry Picking Is So Much Fun

Among his other ventures, my boss owns quite a bit of farmland and he has a few cherry orchards.  Since he is a super nice guy, he sets a date each year there is a cherry crop and allows us to come pick cherries with our families.

There weren't any cherries last year, so we were pretty excited to get to pick cherries this year.

Carder was quite excited to get to pick cherries, too.  He was a very good cherry picker.  He loved climbing the ladder to get the ones that were very high up and he really didn't want to stop picking even when we had more than enough!

The farm manager even drove his tractor up so that Carder could ride on it.  I think he prefers the John Deere tractors with the cabs (like his Grandpa's) because he refused to ride on the tractor.  He did sit on our laps and pretend to drive, though.