Home three months!

Three months ago James was placed in our arms.

Hard to believe now...especially since it feels like he's always been in them.

I could write a book about the last three months.  

All the amazing baby steps of progress I've seen on a daily basis are too many to count.

He has more courage and more resilience than I have in my big toe.

From the 40 times he physically falls down a day to all the change he has endured, he is a model of strength and joy.

He is so smart.  He never takes a break from observing, learning, trying, and most often succeeding.  

He loves to have fun and has the easiest, sweetest, most genuine smile I've ever seen.

Now, he also has a fake smile.  We all have one.  He used his so much in the beginning it would break my heart.  He would flash it to me when he was worried he was is trouble or just to check-in with me and be reassured I was still smiling too.  I recently realized he doesn't do this hardly at all anymore and it made me smile.

How many new things do you try a day?  As children maybe we have more openness and more opportunity to do something we haven't before.  But I've been reminded of how much courage it takes and how much reward there is in it.  So many new things, so many firsts for James these past few months and he's handled each one marvelously.

It took just a few short weeks for James to go from high pitch squealing over the dogs to hugging them, sitting on them, smothering them anytime of day.  He went from not eating any dairy to demanding yogurt three or four times a day.  From the way James responded to ice cream in China, I can say confidently that he had not ever tried any before and couldn't understand why we all like the stuff.  Now, he loves it!

Here are a few of his many "firsts":

First Christmas.

First snow.

First silly selfie.

First MRI.

First presents to wrap.  Not his first headband.

His 100th selfie with Mama.

First Christmas morning.

First set of tools.

He's had his first trip to dentist, his first movie in a theatre, his first 'lovey' stuffed animal, his first trip to the park, his first trip to the library, his first time playing with playdoh, drawing with markers, seeing a Christmas tree.  He's also tried so many new foods, slept in new places, and met so many new people....so much for one little guy.

So many times, I watch James and see how much he is soaking up the love from us...just a sponge that had just been waiting for a family's love.

Of course, it's not that simple.  He has had to learn to trust us, to understand the concept of family, to learn to totally depend on Mommy and Daddy....things we may have taken for granted with our girls but things we've had to be so intentional to instill in him.

He's also had to learn about siblings...two adoring sisters in his case.  They have been his whole world and his worst nightmare some days.  He gets so excited to see them each day after school but gets so jealous of the hugs they get from me.  He is learning to share, like all two year olds painfully have to learn, and the girls do a great job teaching him.  It's hilarious to think of all he has learned from them in such a short time.  Three short months ago, he had never been introduced to the wonders of Lalaloopsey's, lip gloss, bejeweled hair accessories, or mermaid dolls in the bath.  

James is one of the most loving children I've ever been around.  He loves to be held, loves hugs, and gives the sweetest kisses ever.  I can't remember what my days were like without his constant love.

This past weekend we celebrated Chinese New Year with special friends.  Lillianna, Ellenie, and James wore the silk outfits we bought while we were in China.  The girls got dressed first and were prancing and twirling around with James watching.  I put his outfit on him and he strutted around smiling for a long time.  

Speaking of strutting...

Have I mentioned how well this guys walks these days?

Not sure I have talked about it before.

We knew James had an orthopedic need that had been diagnosed in China as a club foot.

From the first day we saw him, we suspected that it might be something different.

  Also from that first day, we knew this guy would amaze and surpass all expectations

 doctors might try to give him.

We started with our wonderful pediatrician and then on to specialists...pediatric orthopedist, pediatric neurologist, pediatric neuro-surgeon, and then back to the orthopedist.  

All to find out what we already knew...James is one of a kind in this world.

Because he had spent most of his time in a crib, James could barely stand with assistance. 

Within a very short time and with a stunning amount of will power and persistence, he began to stand by himself and then began to walk.

Walk!  By himself!

Something we had been told he might not do.  Ever.

We are taking one step at a time and have a very big step this week.

James is having surgery early Tuesday morning on his right foot to both lengthen his heel cord and to transfer muscle and tendon from the bottom of his foot to the top.

Prayers for a successful surgery would be greatly appreciated.

Oh and prayers for my sweet little boy to be as resilient, strong, accepting and happy....

  especially when he wakes up with a cast on his sweet little leg.

We are the ones that have been blessed by this bundle of miracle.  I am the one who has learned so much about love, about giving, about joy.  He is the one who has given it all.

Six years old.

My dear Ellenie,

Well, that picture sums it up.  You, my love, are beyond words.  I didn't know there could be SO MUCH in one teeny tiny body.

So much love, so much loveliness.

So much wit, so much charm.

So much beauty, so much confidence.

So much fun, so much wonder.

So much sweetness, so much intelligence.

Did I say so much personality?

So much kindness, so much talent.

So much laughter, so much silliness.

So much creativity.  So much.

My Ebug,

You are packed full with so much wonderfulness.  At six years old, I feel like you could fill up six people with just your little self.  You have so much to give, so much to say, so much to do.  You keep me on my toes with your opinions, your questions, and often, your demands.  You also melt my heart with your tenderness, your need for snuggles, your brilliant smile.  I love how much you love your big sister but have marveled at watching you become a big sister these past few months.  They both are so lucky to have you.  You started kindergarten this year and although you're still not sure about it, you've conquered every aspect of it.  Especially the friend part- how did you learn everyone's name that first week?  People love to listen to your teeny voice, big vocabulary, and even bigger stories.  When you're not talking, you are playing, and when you're not playing, you're snuggling.  You still give the best.hugs.ever.  You brighten every room and absolutely illuminate my days.

I love you so very much!

Love, 

Mama

Gratitude

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” — Albert Einstein

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” — Marcel Proust

“At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” — Albert Schweitzer

“For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food, for love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever.  Give thanks to the God of gods. His love endures forever. Give thanks to the Lord of lords: His love endures forever.” (Psalm 136:1,2,3).

Just keep swimming...just keep swimming...just keep swimming.

We've been home with James for over two weeks.

At times, I am completely amazed at how seamlessly he has fit right into our family and how seamlessly our family has transitioned into a family of five.

At other times, I feel like we are all swimming with our eyes closed…figuring out where we are going as we swim along, always unsure when we might crash into a wall.

We have been intentional during these first few weeks home, to "cocoon" as a family, spending lots of time at home and even more time together.  It has definitely had its desired effect as I can tell James is truly bonding with each one of us, beginning to have an understanding of of his home, feeling comfortable to be himself, and really enjoying all the love and attention.

  In an ideal world, all five of us could have spent these last two weeks at home together; but we couldn't.  Brad had to go back to his demanding job and the girls had to go back to school.

Which meant we all had to be up early, breakfast made, lunches packed, homework completed, harp lessons, dinnertime meetings, art lessons, field trips, forgotten lunch boxes, halloween costumes, homework left at home, dentist appointments…and on and on.

Swimming with my eyes closed I tell ya.

Now to be clear, we are doing really great.  With each day, we are finding our footing and sliding into our new routines and rhythms.  We are light years beyond where I thought we would be at this point...where many families coming home with their little ones usually are.

  We are so very blessed that James is doing so well.  We are experiencing all the normal growing pains of adding to our family and I can absolutely verify that it's true...going from 2 to 3 kids is not too hard  pretty tough.  

There was a moment in China where we had travelled all day and were on our way to our hotel around midnight.  James was asleep in my lap and Ellenie was asleep in Brad's lap.  I looked over at Lillianna who was nodding off with her head against the window.  Any other time in her life I would have gathered her into my lap so she could sleep soundly.  And that's when it hit me...there's only two of us and three of them.

  I just continue to pray that God will guide me in wisdom, fill me with patience, and allow a third arm to grow from my body so I can give them each all they need.

  

As a parent, you often get to experience all four seasons in a day with your children and I can definitely say the same about this journey.  We have some of THE MOST precious, beautiful moments and a few REALLY hard moments combined with LIFE enriching, completely encouraging moments and CRAZY patience trying moments all in one day.  

It's such a joy and a privilege to be a part of James experiencing so many 'firsts'.

First time feeling grass...first time eating ice...first time getting kissed by a dog...first time seeing fire...

first time feeding a goat.

Yes, we got to experience each of these with our girls but they were spread out over time and many when they were much younger than James is now.  It's just so fun to see the wonder, the excitement, and the joy he has with each one.

It's also amazing to see how much progress he has made in our short time home.  From his physical capabilities to his language, from his level of comfort in the car seat to sleeping in his room, we are just so proud of this brave, resilient little boy.   We are sure he had never seen a dog before and certainly not one the size of a small horse.  James was so scared of Boone that first week and screamed a high pitch scream and clung on to me for dear life.  Then, he stopped screaming and just tried to ignore her...

Just two weeks later...

I love seeing James with his sisters.

He is still trying to figure out why they are so nice to him - why they would want to share their toys, make him laugh, or give him kisses.  

We are grateful for what a healthy boy we have

We have begun making the rounds to see doctors and make sure he gets all the all the care he needs.

Here he is at the doctors office looking very unsure and serious

 which doesn't show what a tough cookie he really is.

He is walking more every day.

His determination is incredibly inspiring.

Can I also brag on how smart he is?

This little bit doesn't miss one thing.

He imitates all we say and do...

from putting our hands on our hips to replacing batteries,

we have to pay attention to everything we do in front of him because he'll be doing it next.

Our new normal is very different but delicious.

Our new normal is tiring but terrific.

Our new normal is exhausting but exhilarating.

I am loving our new normal and I am determined to start opening my eyes under water.