All is calm, all is bright.
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| North Ogden // Christmas Eve 2012 |
12/30/12
12/23/12
PoW: Dec 16-23
A great Christmasy week worthy of two photos:
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| The Cathedral of the Madeline Christmas Carol Service 2012 |
12/16/12
12/9/12
12/6/12
The Weepies
This is an old video and I may have already posted it, but I love it. Enough to shamelessly post it twice. Beautifully made to one of my most favorite beautiful songs!
12/2/12
11/25/12
11/18/12
11/14/12
3 years later
Yet here I was, driving to the Oquirrh Mountain temple on that clear, cold November 14th morning with tears in my eyes. And the reason why weighed my heart down. I cried because I was driving myself to the temple. Sure, my family would have gladly picked me up along their way if I'd asked, but that wasn't the point. In my mind, a woman receiving her endowment was synonymous with her fast approaching wedding day. That's just the way it's done, right? It had been the way I'd seen most everyone in my life do it. And I was discouraged that I wasn't following suit. I had a life plan and that plan wasn't being realized as I had hoped. I should be driving to the temple in the company of my handsome soon-to-husband, starry-eyed and so twitterpated that I could burst. But instead I was alone, my cold hands fumbling to put my favorite Paul Cardall song on repeat as a meager attempt to calm my heart. Not quite the shiny scenario I had envisioned in my previous years.
A large part of me felt that by taking this step I was giving up on ever getting married. That I was surrendering myself to a life of first dates and making dinner for one (though more if you counted the alarming number of cats I was sure to collect). An endless state of adolescence. And I didn't want that. Ever. But in my mind I was taking one giant leap closer to becoming that woman. And yet. No one was forcing me to take this step. So why?
The quote goes "You must learn to walk to the edge of the light, and then a few steps into the darkness; then the light will appear and show the way before you." Now while I'd hardly call going to the temple a matter of darkness, making the decision to do this on my own was most certainly me moving toward that terrifying and looming edge of darkness. The unknown. It petrified me. But I had asked and Heavenly Father had confirmed to me that it was time to take this next step. I wanted to learn more about my religion and to increase in understanding. I wanted a closer relationship with my Heavenly Father more than I was scared of becoming the neighborhood cat lady. And so I cautiously crept toward and tip toed into that darkness.
I wish I could tell you that the next part of the story involved me serendipitously bumping into Mr. Right on my way to the endowment room and they lived happily ever after. How's that for a reward, huh?? That'd make for a very tight-knit sacrament talk on faith where everything falls right into place. But it didn't. I believe those tight-knit stories are the exception and most certainly not the norm (Though many begin to think otherwise and then feel inadequate when comparing their loose ends to the seemingly tidy package others appear to have ... but that's a different post!). I'm learning that rewards come from our Heavenly Father in all different shapes and sizes. I didn't find Mr. Right that day at the temple or the day after. Or even yet. But the blessings I've received from taking that step into the darkness are irreplaceable. I've been softened by the temple's peace in the midst of my confusions, have grown more confident in my testimony, and am continually better understanding the bare-bones WHY of the Gospel for my own life. I better understand my Heavenly Father's nature and just how much He really does love me. I'm now so grateful I had the opportunity to receive my endowment separate from such a life altering event as marriage. I recognize the distinct separation of the two ordinances and now, given the choice, would absolutely do it the same way all over again. I understand that this isn't everyone's path. But I'm very grateful it was mine.
I'm still not certain where Mr. Right is. Amid a sea of young (and not so young) single adults in Salt Lake, it's sometimes flabbergasting to think that it hasn't happened yet. I do worry. I worry that I'll become an awkward dater. I worry I'll be that oldish woman desperately trying to dress like she's 22 (you know the kind). I worry I'll be tempted to buy a few seasons of Golden Girls just to take notes on how they made it work. I find myself daydreaming about what it would be like to write my first name with a different last name or to read bedtime stories with my kids. But until those dreams are realized, I'll just try to recall the time when I thought I knew the plan my life was supposed to follow, yet Heavenly Father had something much better in mind.
11/13/12
Friendsgiving
Thanksgiving came early! Well, for our friends it did. Last year we celebrated at Sizzler (stop looking at me like that) and this year we wanted something a little more personal. So we planned a sit down family style dinner.
This was our first attempt at cooking a turkey and though there were a few mishaps I think it went well. We named her Gina and she was a total rockstar. Cleaning out Gina certainly wasn't my favorite thing in the world - especially when you have no clue what you're doing. But fun people make everything better so it turned out to be one of the most entertaining parts of the night. We made a few frantic phone calls to our mothers, a few desperate Google searches, and went a little rouge from the instructions. But we did it!
Great minds think (and shop) alike
This was our first attempt at cooking a turkey and though there were a few mishaps I think it went well. We named her Gina and she was a total rockstar. Cleaning out Gina certainly wasn't my favorite thing in the world - especially when you have no clue what you're doing. But fun people make everything better so it turned out to be one of the most entertaining parts of the night. We made a few frantic phone calls to our mothers, a few desperate Google searches, and went a little rouge from the instructions. But we did it!
Displaying a cooked Gina with our best Vanna White skills:
Great minds think (and shop) alike
And what would Thanksgiving dinner be without a pie eating contest? It started off as a joke and next thing I know I'm being handed a napkin bib and staring at a piece of chocolate cream pie while considering my strategy. That escalated quickly.
Anna won! Impressive. I lost! Surprise surprise. I'm not certain why I even participated considering I've never been known for my speedy eating skills. Shanna does a great impression of me eating fries, but I'll save that for another day. Or never because sometimes the truth hurts.
I have a lot to be grateful for this year, and these people are a large part of that. Happy Early Thanksgiving!
11/11/12
PoW: Nov 4-11
Life can really be a kick in the pants sometimes. But great weekends like this last one certainly take the edge off!
11/4/12
11/1/12
Chocolate cake, please
October: Always a great month. Vibrant leaves, awkwardly awesome Halloween costumes, enough sugar to demand a root canal. And BOOTS. Let's not forget the return of wonderful boots.
Though I most definitely earn the "creature of habit" title, October is a good reminder to me that change and transition can actually be pretty beautiful. Especially when it looks like towering white aspens with bright yellow leaves. Yet even staring at that beautiful aspen, I often find myself wishing for change sparingly and autumn continually. I'll take my cake and eat it too, thankyouverymuch.
October in a nutshell that looks like a grid that easily could have been six times the size. Because that's how epic autumn can really be. And how much I love photos ... duh :)
Though I most definitely earn the "creature of habit" title, October is a good reminder to me that change and transition can actually be pretty beautiful. Especially when it looks like towering white aspens with bright yellow leaves. Yet even staring at that beautiful aspen, I often find myself wishing for change sparingly and autumn continually. I'll take my cake and eat it too, thankyouverymuch.
October in a nutshell that looks like a grid that easily could have been six times the size. Because that's how epic autumn can really be. And how much I love photos ... duh :)
10/28/12
PoW: Oct 21-28
Things I learned from Zombie Jess (well, half Zombie Jess):
- It's so much easier to try to be ugly than it is to try to be pretty - and with a lot less pressure!
- I need to learn how to growl
- Need a wax? Liquid latex will do the job ... whether you like it or not
- Avoid eye contact at Walmart
- Crimped hair is back and better than ever
- The DI is always a good idea
- Next time: more blood!
- HALLOWEEN ROCKS
10/21/12
PoW: Oct 14-21
This is what happens when we have a free hour on a fall Saturday afternoon. Good thing you can't really see the outline of the cell phones in our pockets or the illusion would be blown.
Stop trying to find the cell phone outline and just pretend we're actually ghosts, huh? My face might not be super convincing, but Anna's .... oh geez. Someone's seen The Sixth Sense a few too many times.
10/7/12
PoW: Sept 30 - Oct 7
There's something so awesome about mountains and beautiful fading light that sucks me in every. single. time.
10/2/12
10/1/12
9/23/12
9/17/12
9/12/12
9/11/12
9/10/12
PoW: Sept 2-9
Kam on a rock! I just love how her tongue peeks out from in between her missing teeth when she smiles big.
9/3/12
8/27/12
PoW: Aug 19-26
I have yet to decide what nickname sounds right, but I'm leaning toward Kinners.
Sweet little Kinners. Yeah, I like it.
8/12/12
8/6/12
Hurricane ... Unplugged!
Up until last weekend I didn't know this version of Hurricane even existed. Now that I've found it I couldn't be happier about it! Just close your eyes and listen to that wonderful voice of his :)
7/29/12
7/22/12
7/17/12
Ogden Marathon 2012
So let's back up. Back up to May, to be exact. In between those two sweet spring babies was a marathon. I ran the Ogden marathon alongside Anna and Charlotte - #2 for all of us. The experience has been numbed a bit since it was a few months ago. I really wish I had written everything down right after. Lesson learned.
Here's the rundown. We were chatty on the bus ride up - half nerves and half excitement. Okay probably more nerves than anything else. I had gotten about 3 hours of sleep at best, so I was worried about having enough energy to crank out 26.2 miles. As with St. George, the bus ride up to the starting line seemed to go on forever and ever ... and all I could think was how I needed to run it the entire way back. But we eventually pulled up and headed to join the crazy long lines to the porta potties.
We barely made it through the porta potty line before the gun went off. Guess that stress was a good way to get my heart rate up and going for the race. We were herded along with everyone else across the starting line and then ... GO. Overall we kept a pretty decent pace. It was a bit quicker than what we trained at, but I was feeling so set on coming in under 4 hours that I didn't care.
Forgive me if this middle part is less than descriptive for actually being about 4 hours long, but in my mind it all kind of blurs together. The weather was great and the course were beautiful. I expected that considering I grew up in the area, but while running I was able to really look around and take it all in. The way the light was hitting all of the grass and farmland was pretty awesome and created a bit of a distraction every now and again.
Around mile 13, my fear became a reality: that familiar and dreaded IT band zing in my outer knee. But not just my left knee this time ... both of them. BOTH! Not funny. It was stabbing pain with every step I took, but what was I supposed to do? I stopped for a minute to readjust my IT band band (That name sounds weird. It's gotta have a real name, right? It's not just something that sounds like a stutter.) I said a few pretty fervent (probably more desperate) prayers and tried my best to focus on something else. Anything else. Cut to mile 18 - the pain had gradually dulled enough that I no longer wanted to trip just so I could sit down and make the pain stop. Happy!
I love Anna's halfhearted thumbs up in the right hand photo. And I also love that if you pretend I'm not running, it almost looks like I'm doing a Richard Simmons dance move. See, friends who think I don't dance? Don't blink or you might miss it.
Anyway. So we kept running. And then we ran some more until we were on the last stretch of the race. And that last little bit felt like the longest stretch eeeevvveer. Grant Avenue basically never ends. As much as I love my dear Ogden, I've never hated that street more in my life. Did you know that there are pretty much no trees along that stretch? Very few trees. No shade. Just a hot, wide, barren street speckled with delirious runners. I so wanted someone to just run up and dump water over my head Superbowl style.
Seeing everyone gave me more energy and helped me make it through that last little bit without tripping across the finish line (a genuine fear of mine). FINISHER! I came in at 3:58 (under 4!). We were all able to beat our PRs and walked away happy about that.
With St. George I was plagued with post-race blisters. I'm happy to report that this wasn't the case with Ogden! HOWEVER. This time around those blisters were replaced by a few blackened toenails. 1 3/4, to be exact. I'm hoping those little suckers can hold on throughout summer and decide to fall off sometime around winter when I won't need them to look as presentable for others. I'm including a photo, but keeping it small so you don't have to see all of my scary looking toenails.
** Funny story about those scary looking toes: When they first turned black I thought it was so funny looking. One Sunday I asked Kambri which of my toes is the ugliest. Now, I asked this thinking that, of course, my black toenails would the winners. Right? Kambri surprised me by quickly pointing to my pinky toe and saying, "That one." Dang. Guess I shouldn't ask if I don't want an honest response.
It's been a few months since the race so my IT bands are slowly healing. I won't be running much for the next little bit in hopes of healing faster. I'm thinking about #3, though. Ogden again or maybe Top of Utah. I'm so happy to have discovered such a love for running in the last 3 or 4 years. It's given me a lot of really great experiences and through those experiences I've learned a lot that doesn't even directly relate to running. Three cheers for running!
That being said, Charlotte pretty well summed up the experience with this awesome little ditty:
Well done :)
Here's the rundown. We were chatty on the bus ride up - half nerves and half excitement. Okay probably more nerves than anything else. I had gotten about 3 hours of sleep at best, so I was worried about having enough energy to crank out 26.2 miles. As with St. George, the bus ride up to the starting line seemed to go on forever and ever ... and all I could think was how I needed to run it the entire way back. But we eventually pulled up and headed to join the crazy long lines to the porta potties.
We barely made it through the porta potty line before the gun went off. Guess that stress was a good way to get my heart rate up and going for the race. We were herded along with everyone else across the starting line and then ... GO. Overall we kept a pretty decent pace. It was a bit quicker than what we trained at, but I was feeling so set on coming in under 4 hours that I didn't care.
Forgive me if this middle part is less than descriptive for actually being about 4 hours long, but in my mind it all kind of blurs together. The weather was great and the course were beautiful. I expected that considering I grew up in the area, but while running I was able to really look around and take it all in. The way the light was hitting all of the grass and farmland was pretty awesome and created a bit of a distraction every now and again.
Around mile 13, my fear became a reality: that familiar and dreaded IT band zing in my outer knee. But not just my left knee this time ... both of them. BOTH! Not funny. It was stabbing pain with every step I took, but what was I supposed to do? I stopped for a minute to readjust my IT band band (That name sounds weird. It's gotta have a real name, right? It's not just something that sounds like a stutter.) I said a few pretty fervent (probably more desperate) prayers and tried my best to focus on something else. Anything else. Cut to mile 18 - the pain had gradually dulled enough that I no longer wanted to trip just so I could sit down and make the pain stop. Happy!
I love Anna's halfhearted thumbs up in the right hand photo. And I also love that if you pretend I'm not running, it almost looks like I'm doing a Richard Simmons dance move. See, friends who think I don't dance? Don't blink or you might miss it.
Anyway. So we kept running. And then we ran some more until we were on the last stretch of the race. And that last little bit felt like the longest stretch eeeevvveer. Grant Avenue basically never ends. As much as I love my dear Ogden, I've never hated that street more in my life. Did you know that there are pretty much no trees along that stretch? Very few trees. No shade. Just a hot, wide, barren street speckled with delirious runners. I so wanted someone to just run up and dump water over my head Superbowl style.
Somehow, the stretch got smaller and the chutes finally appeared. Running through them I found our cheering section! Almost my entire family, some awesome friends, and then Shanna again (Shanna has some strange magical power to appear at random spots throughout the course when you least expect it. It's pretty great.)
Seeing everyone gave me more energy and helped me make it through that last little bit without tripping across the finish line (a genuine fear of mine). FINISHER! I came in at 3:58 (under 4!). We were all able to beat our PRs and walked away happy about that.
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| Shanna's killer signs |
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| Some of my cheering squad |
With St. George I was plagued with post-race blisters. I'm happy to report that this wasn't the case with Ogden! HOWEVER. This time around those blisters were replaced by a few blackened toenails. 1 3/4, to be exact. I'm hoping those little suckers can hold on throughout summer and decide to fall off sometime around winter when I won't need them to look as presentable for others. I'm including a photo, but keeping it small so you don't have to see all of my scary looking toenails.
It's been a few months since the race so my IT bands are slowly healing. I won't be running much for the next little bit in hopes of healing faster. I'm thinking about #3, though. Ogden again or maybe Top of Utah. I'm so happy to have discovered such a love for running in the last 3 or 4 years. It's given me a lot of really great experiences and through those experiences I've learned a lot that doesn't even directly relate to running. Three cheers for running!
That being said, Charlotte pretty well summed up the experience with this awesome little ditty:
Well done :)
7/16/12
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