Changes

So I know that I can post this and not worry about anyone reading it. No one reads the blogs anymore at this point it is just journaling. So since Christmas I have gained about 10 pounds. At first I thought it was because I was drinking so much pop and we were eating out so much with no significant exercise. But in the last week unconsciously I think I have known that it's not just pop and eating. In  the last couple days I have had some physical changes that prompted me to have David buy a pregnancy test. As soon as I got home today I took the test and just knew that it was going to be positive. It was and I freaked out. Luckily I had a few minutes to call the OB office before they closed and get scheded for an appointment. When David got home from the store and came in our room I broke down. I am honesty scared. With all my health problems and not knowing how far along I am the threat of miscarriage is high and frightening. I don't know how I am supposed to be the primary provider for the family, go to school and be pregnant and have a baby. David already has to take on so much at home and this will just add to his responsibilities. I am going to get BIG, I started out big and like I said I have gained 10 pounds. I really need to get out and walk. Well that's all for now. Dad is coming over later to help David give me a blessing.

Work, school, home.

Not much changes around here often. The new semester started this week for mom. She is taking 11 credits. She also is working more in here supervisor position at work and she gets very little quality time at home. Everything else seems to be the same.

The past week

This past week was pretty bad for our family. We have all had our turn at the flu, and it was a bad bout. Hopefully we are all on the road to recovery and this coming week will be better.

The envelope

Today when we came home from church there was a white Zions bank envelope hooked into the wreath. There was a scripture on one side of the envelope and the other side said Bushar Family. Inside the envelope was $1000 cash. David and I have no idea who would leave it there for us but whoever did must have done so by a prompting from the Holy Ghost. We have been greatly blessed. I hope that someday David and I will be able to do something like this for another family in need.

Sunday

Today has not been a good day so far. All night I struggled with an ocular migraine. This morning I woke up with a pretty severe left sided headache. David helped by bringing me breakfast in bed and givin me a massage with peppermint oil. I put on a brave face and got ready for church. We got to church right before the meeting started so we were sitting in the overflow. As we are singing the sacrament hymn Christy shows me that my name is on the program to say the closing prayer, news to me and not good news. Then before the Sacrament is finished David dumps his sippy cup of orange juice all over me and the floor. So I went out to the foyer and Christy cleaned up the mess because David was off somewhere trying to control Treyven. I decided to stay out in the foyer still fighting my stupid headache. David did what he could to help me with the boys and when he went in to say the closing prayer for me I was in my hands and knees cleaning up yet another spill. I wonder when the boys will start sitting quietly during church and when my headaches will go away!

Leaps of faith.

Its times like these that I need to rely heavily on the knowledge that Heavenly Father knows what's best for us and he can see our path clearly. David lost his job with the post office yesterday. I know that things will work out but I am frustrated none the less. I want more than anything to be home more with my children but that doesn't seem to be in the cards for our family at this time. Also with so many changes going on with my work my workload and hours most likely will increase. I know that there is a plan in place for us, it just might take a while for that next door to open. Maybe Heavenly Father is telling me that I need to hit my knees more often and attend the Temple more. 

Compliments

At work I have been helping Nicole with job interviews. Today when we were done dr jevsevar asked Nicole what she thought. She was saying how she wants to make sure we hire the right people. Then dr jevsevar said "the biggest hiring mistake we ever made was not hiring rebecca the first time we interviewed her". Wow that made me feel good. Lately I haven't been feeling to great about work and have been struggling with wether or not to look seriously for another job. Partly because I feel greatly under appreciated. Dr jevsevars comment helped me feel a little better about my job. I guess I will stay a little longer. I have made the decision to go back to school. Now that david is all done I can go. I got my transcripts from when I went to utah valley right after high school and I am so embrassed about the grades I got. Hopefully this time around I can do it right and finish with a degree!