Monday, April 30, 2007

hello world v.2

this post was created on a whim.

i have a desire to blog, but there isn't much to talk about! is this the beginning of an addiction...?

anyway (a sidetrack), a "hello!" to all from scholarship panel(s) who chanced upon my blog (i think my blog is too easy to find). i've nothing to hide anyway, feel free to look around :) thought that i'd spruce up the layout a little bit, the previous one was much harder to read and less pleasing to the eye.

back on track, i'm supposed to run from home to NUS to aljunied to bishan and toa payoh in a span of 4 hours. tell me it is possible by means of public transport (and i don't mean taxis). let's see:

home to NUS (bus 188): 40 min, excluding waiting time
submitting of stuff in NUS: 10 min?
NUS to Buona Vista MRT: 15 min, including waiting time?
Buona Vista MRT to Aljunied MRT: 30 min?
Aljunied MRT to Singapore Badminton Association and back again: 30 min
Aljunied MRT to Bishan MRT: 30 min max
Bishan MRT to RJC and back: 30 min
Bishan MRT to Toa Payoh MRT: 10 min, including waiting time
Toa Payoh MRT to HDB Hub: less than 5 min

that'll take 200 min, or 3 h 20 min, with an extra 40 min. (however, i think my calculations are screwed up, i may take a lot longer).

guess why i'm going to NUS/Badminton Association/RJC/HDB Hub today *sigh*

Sunday, April 29, 2007

the architecture apititude test is fun!

fun and stressful, that is... having zero formal art education, i struggle to finish the test on time lol! but the cool thing about the test is that as long as you have a thinking brain, you can answer all the questions to the best of your ability :)

i hope my masterpiece is interpreted favourably. it's quite simple looking compared to the bombastic designs of most other people... but if what shuting said is to be true, i have a 50% chance of getting in :D

the U5P one is tricker, though. 1 in 4 :S chances are so-so la.

zomg NUS is THE PLACE for me, can? i took a DIRECT BUS from the DOORSTEP OF MY HOUSE, landed at the DOORSTEP of the School of Design and Environment ;) it only takes 35-40 min!

*POI: it takes less than 10 min for me to travel to NTU by car/cab :P my apartment ought to fetch higher market prices for that!*

what a week this has been!!! field camp, interviews, high spending (but all of it justified), little gatherings with people, and other mind-blowing stuff. somebody pinch me, i need a reality check!

next week will be even more killer man. monday interview, tuesday 4T gathering, wednesday-saturday FIELD CAMP/EXERCISE :( and next-next week is THE WORST. the most gruelling interview on monday, and THE FIELD CAMP @ Tekong is from wednesday to saturday.

oh, did i mention i missed silver for IPPT by ONE BLOODY PULL UP!? i was two-thirds my way up the 8th pull up and my arms just can't push on a wee bit more. the consequence?? IPPT RETEST NEXT-NEXT WEEK! #$%&#$^*#%^!@#%!!! i don't think i can reproduce my already astonishing results obtained during the earlier IPPT test (thanks to the cool weather and rain). oh, good grief!

i'm not exactly dreading any of it, though. maybe because i'm used to it already *shrugs*

looking forward to: 31st may!

Sunday, April 22, 2007

response

i am grateful for everything that i have!

i think i'm extremely fortunate and unworthy to have so much good things going on for me in life; thank yous go out to everyone whose lives crossed mine :) although not all my experiences are positive, they probably played a big part in changing me, i'm growing stronger and more mature...

why am i typing all these all of a sudden? just feel very insecure to be in my present circle of people (i.e. the people in PLC), insecure because i'm wondering if i made bad impressions on people. very sure that there are detractors around, be it truly my fault or their pettiness, but you gotta carry on with your life! i got my real friends, that's good enough :)

maybe my insecurity stems from my oversensitivity towards others' feelings, and my level of self-confidence which can be represented by a sine graph (it's currently not at a crest, but neither a trough).

all these has made me think about whether karma is really enforced in our lives. not to say that i'm a goody-two-shoes, but i guess my family background is quite decent (esp my immediate family) so the goodness of my family members translate into good things for me? conversely, some people get spooked by first-hand supernatural experiences, you know, seeing dirty things and possessed people and all? will my fortunes change? do i deserve my life? haiz.

i'm not in any position to comment about how people handle their lives, especially since i have not been through their experiences. the stormy weather looks nice when you view it from behind a window. seeking shelter under the canopy of a tree may be suicidal; sometimes it's better to keep running on in the rain to find something better!

my peers and i are at THE major point in our lives. thank goodness i have mine vaguely sorted out. managed to find the 'middle path' which should be able to allow me to pursue artistic, creative, and (very hopefully!!!) musical paths in future. sadly, though, being a physics teacher won't be possible anymore, if things go right. (i'm thinking that if electrico can achieve this much with their day jobs, i can do it too!)

to all those that may be still confused, well, i guess it'll be good to continue thinking about your present and future... the answer is probably not obvious at all, but when it sinks into you, it could be the THING you're looking for.

*****
personal anecdote: i've been learning music when i was 6, auditioned when i was 10 and failed to enter the then-TCS productions HAHA (that basically created the fear in me of trying out for acting roles, even in the safe school environment)! tried for 'sing to the dawn' when i was 15 and of course i failed! participated in interclass singing contests, cristofori music sch piano competitions (harhar) and evantually choir in sec sch and JC. my life's been full of music, i did seriously think of pursuing music in university, but thinking of the possible jobs i would have and evantually, my relative lack of passion in classical music made me realise it's not for me.

another option when i was in primary/secondary school was psychology. bought a couple of books related to that, it is quite interesting, really, esp when you can relate to your own experiences. again, didn't choose that because of a shift in interest...

physics or engineering was one of my top choices in upper sec/JC because of my realisation that i liked to teach physics concepts to my peers (it also happened at the time which my academics finally picked up, you know? that feeling that you've grown brainier because you can truly assimilate information) anyway, dropped that thought, because teaching is to be my career choice later in life, and i can't quite imagine myself dealing with electronics and mechanical stuff for so many years of my (career) life.

so what the hell do i want? my innermost desire is to be some kind of performer, but where do i start? also, i want a varied, creative life. the desire to be a performer is very clear to me, but realising that i want a career related with creativity came later to me.

looking back at what i've done, i realised i actually have interest in interior designing when i was very young (think 7 - 10 years old!) i found A3 papers which had my drawings of how i'd like my bedroom to look like, where all the worksheets are placed, where the personal fridge and inbuilt shower room are(i indulge in opulence). i also remember the 1000s of versions of my ideal treehouse, an integrated self-suffcient town even with an underground community, and (can you believe this) lifts built in the middle of the trunk and a train/monorail service that climbs its way up the tree by spiralling, serving an estate-worth of families (lolz!)

and i look forward to the yearly issue of the IKEA catalogue ever since during secondary school hahaha!

i never thought that i would want to pursue this interest seriously in the past. the memories of drawing all those stuff when i was 7 only resurfaced this year, like a signal that tells me i did not choose this path on a whim.
*****

you know johari's window? basically some psychological concept that says that there are 4 parts of us: things that everyone including yourself know about you, things that only you know about yourself, things that everyone except yourself know about you, and finally, things that no one, not even you, know about yourself. perhaps you've not opened up the fourth panel of the window, and may need some time to analyse what you really like, or find out through trial and error.

things you'd love to do may or may not be the best option, because of practical reasons e.g. money or social/personal life. and it's not a good idea to shut yourself off from certain ventures, i think. i never thought i'd like to do business (business to me was making money out of things that aren't yours) but i suppose selling your creative ideas is a worthwhile effort to me? when you feel that something truly belongs to you, i guess anything related to it is of interest as well.

i can never forget the good and bad times i had with everyone. people may change, but we share the same memories, though the viewpoint may be different with time. that's something to take comfort in, right? in the meantime, indulge in simple pleasures that require little brainpower nor evoke emotions!

Saturday, April 21, 2007

music, me and composing

i've been wanting to post this for a long time... so here it is!!

http://cliffauyong.multiply.com/

if you like to know what i've been up to in school during the past two years, please do listen to my very own compositions :P *ego boosted!*

i like the last 3 parts of "chicken rice" (starts from about 1:5 i think) haha... the first movement was heavily quoted from one source (some would know right away). quite proud of my little achievements in the 2nd movement (1:50 to 3:18), never mind the poor rendition - we the recording 'artistes' didn't practise hard. anyway, i thought of the chord progressions and melody myself leh!!! :P:P 3rd movement is quoted from many places, heavily influenced by contemporary pop. actually, i wanted to compose pop music for the portfolio submission haha.

if my music illiterate cousin (who only listens to canto and mandopop) and chenjie the critical, classical-only guy both love my second movement, i think my music rulez! *MUAHAHAHA*

i like my clockwork a wee bit more, because i spent so much time on it to fine tune so many parts... this is where notation softwares rock! copy-pasting, transpositions, augmentations/dimunitions, parallel 5ths and 8ve checks etc... can even playback the song to test things out!

learnt so many things about composition by fiddling with it for so long (imagine spending entire afternoons + nights just sitting down at the computer screen, wondering what to do with the composition)


***START OF BRAINY STUFF***
*TIPS for A level music students from a noobie post-A level music student*

1. SAVE all your drafts! what you threw away 1 year ago may make a comeback in a different composition, in the form of direct quoting, or inspiration for something else

2. do it in YOUR style. do what you most enjoy doing and what you do best. no point forcing yourself to do a 4 part polyphonic piece when your voiceleading techniques suck etc.

3. listen to more music by other composers. copying bits and pieces is alright, in fact, good! when i say copying i mean copy interesting harmonic progressions/melodies/textures/rhythms/structures etc.

4. be practical, esp if you want to make a live recording out of that one (i.e. players' limitations)

5. start your compositions early. i personally feel that some of them can even be composed concurrently. thing is that over time your ears get more critical towards your own piece, so the more time you have to listen to it, the more fine-tuned the piece can become.

the (inefficient) way i compose is to:

1. brainstorm of the underlying idea(s). it can start from anywhere, depending on your preference. a literary theme/melodic intervals/harmonic progressions/rhythms/overall intended effect etc.

2. get your motifs out! i'm a motif/melody/chord-oriented person, so i usually think of motifs first, but others may do step 3 first, esp. since it's so important too...

3. get your rough structure, you can represent it in a graphical/pictorial form, which is what i like to do... e.g. graph of thickness of texture vs timeline?

4. if your music isn't intended to be an amorphorus lump of sounds, it probably has landmarks where new sounds and TEXTURES are used. don't underestimate the importance of accompaniment! anyway, fill in the start of the 'landmarks', better called as 'sections'.

5. think about how the sections are supposed to link up with each other. the key/instrumentation/texture/melody/chords etc

6. fill up the middle of each section with squeezed brainjuice (i think this is the hardest part - development of ideas) i suggest a mechnical + trial and error approach for noobs like me, which is to use your known techniques (repetition, retrograde yadayada)

7. if you can link up section with section, you should be able to get something coherent. however, don't try to squeeze too many totally different motifs into too short a time, else it can be a medley of songs = less development = low score under the A level mark criteria!
***END OF BRAINY STUFF***


after looking at what i typed, i realise that what i said can be applied to other areas of life. harhar...

wouldn't it be cool to try to create a visual artwork (animation or still, whichever) based on music?? maybe not just an artwork, but entire rooms and buildings? quite cool, then can play the music which inspired the artwork on loop as people view the art...

speaking of looping, just wondering how different personalities can translate into different tastes of music. like how some people may prefer sweet stuff to sour, there could be some measurable, scientific explanation to this hm... conversely, we can work backwards to tailor music for a niche group of listeners...

for me, i love a beautiful voice, beautiful melodies accompanied w/ interesting chords and texture.
**************************

sorry if i have been sounding so boring or arrogant, just organising my thoughts online.

i think the idea of using a ledger to keep track of accounts is working! i only spent $1 (not counting pubic transport) since monday, and the one buck is for washing of clothes ;) must remind myself not to spend, especially when i've already used so much during the past couple of months...

financial 'obstacles' aside, i am rather anxious about the line-up of interviews i'm to have in the next 2 weeks :\ if i can't get into the course i want in a local uni, don't think i'll be able to handle it if i do get an overseas uni...

never mind! it's 2 weeks away! *nervous laughter*

in another 5-6 weeks i'm going to pass out of PLC, will get nervous about vocations but not until later...

ok very tired now, typed a few nonsensical phrases just now... hahaha!

Saturday, April 14, 2007

dreamy...

Your True Love Is a Pisces
Image

Why you'll love a Pisces:

Selfless and intuitive, you are perfect for a Pisces that lives to love you.
You're sensitive enough to appreciate and explore the deep emotions of a Pisces.

Why a Pisces will love you:

You're generous and totally giving in relationships, something Pisces demands.
You are also dreamy enough to get lost in fantasy with Pisces, but realistic enough to stay grounded.


***

what a week for me! a lot of physical training and bumps from hitting walls and sand pits... not to mention that i've been failing (usually) or marginally passing (at best) any administered tests, be it physical/combat/muggable :(

but everything ends well... with a nice sweet choir (raffles junior college choir, or raffles chorale) concert!

too bad the chorale can't perform in VCH or some other decent public venue, the acoustics in the fully packed school lecture theatre isn't good, even with those cute little sound deflectors that look like large sunshades... anyhow i still think the chorale is better than last year, at least there isn't any protruding voices or totally (i really mean TOTALLY) out of pitch moments. the guys and the girls can blend very well within themselves (i'm referring to a particular song which i forgot, i think it's o magnum mysterium - not by morten lauridsen).

my peers have things to say about tone, though. i don't know, i'm alright with the tone, at least it's not covered and mouldy-sounding, albeit uninteresting at times. maybe it's the songs itselves, i don't know? my biggest gripe is that the music was overall not musical enough, things like subtlety, dynamism and especially phrasing are lacking.

*realised that due to my 2 years of training in MEP, my sensitivity and understanding towards music interpretation has grown quite a lot. and listening to some seriously very good pianists (my batchmates) reignites my interest in classical music. chorale has made me understand some technical aspects, especially pitch, blend and acoustics*

oh but i'm liking the choreography that complements the songs quite well! and the dancers for the indonesian song haha! do something like that for SYF and you'll score the GwH (gold with honours) man! speaking of choreography, it's nice to see Fringe do something a bit different (the cute train song). overall, the chorale is so much more relaxed in terms of freedom of body expression! good! (but i'd like to see even more of that)

but being an ex-PUNCH member i'm biased towards PUNCH :P definitely better than last year lol! everything is balanced out: voices, acting etc. :D:D knew that you guys can do it! feel quite proud and slightly bad for being their mentor haha (bad because i *might* have restricted them by giving them my opinion on stuff)

love you guys ya! i want to join (chorale) chamber! if i have the time, that is :(

Saturday, April 07, 2007

what a day

came back from a night movie (jeff's idea). and of all things, a scary prophetic one. rather apt for 'good friday', huh.

***
WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD

'the reaping' is basically about how this pubescent (spelling argh) girl apparently is the cause of supernatural plagues in a town, and it takes a college professor (hillary swank!) who lost her faith to find the cause of the happenings.

apart from the cinematic horror effects (which managed to spook a little but no one in the theatre screamed or anything), i found the fact that an entire town has defaulted very creepy. seemingly normal people (men and women alike), believing in the wrong faith.

i really wonder how they got an entire river red, and how the ladies and THE GIRL survived the ordeal of having thousands of locusts crawling all over you! it's an unreal show (lucky it is unreal. i don't want to see the sun disappear behind black clouds in 10 secs everyday!) the little girl is very chio, btw.

END OF MOST SPOILERS
***

the show's like some (prompt?) wake up call to people who are swaying in their faith at a time like this, i think, like how my mom believes that the 2004 tsunami was the effect of the social/political turmoil in the countries affected.

quite an interesting show. makes you wonder a little about why we have faiths, why do we not believe it it at times, whether it can be explained by science, and how to tell if something is unscientifically created. sorry, will not attempt any discussions at these topics. takes too much brainpower and plus, i totally avoided essay questions on science/tech/religion/faith in JC (i feel incompetent). i usually attempt social questions, more interested in it.

Friday, April 06, 2007

some entertainment and arty stuff

http://www.veoh.com/channels/fluximation

i know most of you people HATE utada's english offerings, but do watch the fluximations :D very colourful and nice, it's in animatrix-style. then somehow you'll like the sounds, the vibes of the album, which i think is very good for something experimental. even elton john agrees! (fact: he DID comment on the album.)

http://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=sugar+water (by Cibo Matto)

i watched this during some civics enrichment lesson in JC (the course was about relationships between art and music). a palindromic MV. i like its technical accuracy in timings :P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H69vr1CTqj8

the official preview of the 5th installment of the harry potter movie! for a moment i was wondering why there were cityscapes in the world of harry potter. that's rather forgivable, i hope? anyway they better quickly finish up the last 2 movies, the teen actors already look like adults (they're 3-5 years ahead of their screen age!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OeG0I0vxbtM&mode=related&search=

an even longer preview, with comments from the actors. bellatrix lestrange is sexyyyy (in a crude way). and i think the actress behind luna lovegood looks better than emma watson haha... *sigh* why isn't BoA casted as cho chang.

ok enjoy yourselves! i suggest we try to explore arty stuff, sometimes they're nicer than the commericialised mandarin MVs (ugh) ok, i'm generalising. there are good commercial stuff out there, but there are quite an amount of stuff left desired from some of them.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

mish-mash of stuff...

*for my convenience of organising my thoughts, and perhaps for the handful of readers - that is you - to prepare themselves mentally for a lengthy post*

table of contents:

1. army
2. re-experiencing the past
3. finances

***

1. army
i'm quite happy to be in my company/platoon/section :) especially when i had quite different (i.e. not-good) expectations of my new training camp. am glad the commanders are personable, not the scary authoritative figures i had expected.

---

2. re-experiencing the past
making trips to the little neighbourhood sundry shops are really special to me. i used to frequent such places when i was younger - followed my mom around the heartland wet markets and provision stores on nearly a daily basis then. the simplicity, the run-down conditions of the shop (think dim lights, concrete ground, rusted shelves etc), the dust covering the wrappers and containers, which acquired the stench of the shop, of the products, THE PRODUCTS themselves... so quaint, and nice to see and smell them again!

in fact, i bought a pack of those cheap chocolate wafers (made in china or something - the wrapper had chinese words) which are probably imitations of kit-kats... they are shaped like simple long rectangular cuboids, wrapped in shiny red-and-brown paper, come in a pack of 10 (ONLY 90 CENTS)... do you remember? don't know if you people have eaten them before.

anyway, brought them to camp to eat and share w/ my bunkmates :)

speaking of food, this is a (non-exhaustive) list of memorable food i've eaten when i was young (i.e. before 10 years old, when i shifted to my present house):

those chinese kit-kats mentioned above
glucogen (orange or grape or original flavours)
'dry' wanton mee with a cup of hot chrysanthemum tea served in those kopitiam-kind of glass mugs (frequently had them for breakfast
si-ge-tuo-ni (the brand w/ a silohuette of an angler) cod liver oil (orange flavour! original sucks) i even remember the refrain of its song! "si-ge-tuo-ni pei-gan-you, pei-ban wo yi-qi zhang-da...!"
ritz biscuits
baby milk biscuits - i can't remember the brand, but it is some english brand i think, with a picture of a baby on their product covers.
ribena (yes, this is a childhood drink for me, coz i stopped drinking it quite early) very sweet and nice, but my mom stopped buying that ever since she noticed my brother tended to have weak legs after drinking it lol!?
milo!!! still drink it now, but somehow it never seemed to taste as good as it did back then...
milo with milk, cold!!! love the mixture my mom made for breakfast whenever she bought milk (in cartons)
for a short while, sustagen (another song: i'm such-a-genius, sustagenious that's my club! growing up that's so much fun, when playin' and learnin' is one! come on come on, and join us for a great time! with suzie and geno, the fun starts... etc etc)
*randomness: remember the silly GROW milk powder ad?*
mcdonald's big breakfast! every sunday after my family's unproductive trip to bukit gombak stadium for a jog... we'd sometimes eat that, or...
dimsum! from a hawker centre in the vincinity...

ok that's enough recalling...

---

3. finances
i am spending a bit too much, i think. but all my expenses are (mostly) justified! like cabbing when there's no time, or buying food to satisfy my hunger pangs. ok, perhaps i shouldn't have bought so many CDs recently, but they cost way less than $100 in total. so i'm really puzzled why my savings actually DECREASED (as claimed by my mom, who updates my bankbook for me - i don't know how she made the conclusion, though) even as i draw pay from NS!?!?

i really think the bulk comes from transport and especially food. it really adds up very fast. say you have to travel by mrt 4 times a day, and maybe a bus trip or two. that can easily cost up to perhaps $1.50 * 4 + $1.00 *2 = $8!!! $8 freaking bucks on transport!

then, add food. being a hungry NSF, i need to snack between meals. each snack can be anything from a buck plus to a few dollars (esp when a drink is added into the fray).

don't talk about meals. confirm spend a lot also, if you're not eating in hawker centres or food courts.

all in all, that can add up to $30 quite easily. BUT, i only book out once a week, how can $30 a week thin out my wallet?

must be the peripheral buys like CDs or books (which i can't help buying leh) or even clothes (yes i dress like a loh-cek or even like a gkin-kia, or kid in hokkien). i got this wonderful plan to revamp part of my cupboard of clothes, but of course that has to be done in slow stages - i'm not earning a lot, and i only wear them ever so (in)frequently anyway.

gah, i really think my mom made a grave mistake in calculating my expenses lol! don't know which dates she compared it with. maybe she compared two close dates, when i happened to draw out money :P

---

***

anyway, end of long post! haha do share your money-saving tactics with me please please please (i heard one way is to save the cash into your bank account right away so you carry less cash around)... also tell me about your fav childhood food or comfort food hahaha!

Sunday, April 01, 2007

6 weird things!

*Each player of this game starts off by giving 6 weird things about themselves. People who get tagged need to write in a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state the rules clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names.*

here goes:

1. i'm shortsighted and longsighted at the same time! R: -1.75 L: +1.00 thereabouts?

2. i'm slow at catching up with the times, admittedly. i only owned my own handphone when i was 17 (2 years ago) and i still don't have an MP3 player. somemore? i dress like a loh-cek, as proclaimed by ryan (which i actually tend to believe)

3. i look like a guai mugger with hair but i am not.

4. i look like a jikopeh without hair but I AM NOT >:( *attempts to murder baldwin*

5. as much as i like to own good expensive stuff *drools* i'm a total sucker for cheap buys! i'm sure everyone around me knows this fact quite well HAHA...

6. i am an atypical normal guy, yes that basically sums up the weirdest parts of me. example? i'm a stay-home guy who DOESN'T play video games :O (i do swim/jog sometimes, though, fyi)

ok i tag: jeff, weixin, baldwin, en hui, han yang and chin guan (eh can livejournal users play this game?)