reminder to self. wake up call!

don't get complacent! DL was last sem, everyone's now on level ground again!

don't believe what everyone says, about being DL, about having a high enough cap to relax now!

i suppose i've less time for studio now because of the songwriting thing and the writing module.

but, still!

clifford, buck up!

***

omg, there isn't ONE day that passes without the mention of DL.

>.<

not to mention, i think my crit didn't go very well. i'm to blame.

very stressful, if you care about your rep. so that's what it's really like over here. you get that feeling those just slightly under can't wait to move up. yea, the competitive-ness can get unhealthy, but isn't that what spurs (ethnically) east asians to do their best!

ok, from today onwards, i will go full throttle on writing and design!

the first month of 2010: bleak realisation

seriously, all of my module lecturers/tutors are awesome! am so happy about that.

BUT, am unhappy about: workload. and myself.

maybe it's just myself. not able to handle things critically anymore. i think way back in 2008-9 i slowly gave in to the easy way out of life, to un-critically let things pass through, to not care or emphatise about things. sure, it has made my emotional well-being better, not introspecting myself and conclude invariably that i'm a failure.

[EDIT:] 4 years (2005-2008) of steadfast friendships gone rocky and fallen apart (how true were those friendships, or, more correctly, how willing were we to keep it going) have hardened me, i suppose. i realise, now, that many people have a few very close friends whom they can share anything with. i used to have those kind of friends. just one at any period of time. but they make all the difference. now, i don't have an affinity to anyone at all. there's nothing much close to heart any of my friends and i discuss, right now. like, i'm very sociable with lots of my course mates - we have lots of fun and laughter and all - but i don't feel an attraction to any of them as chummy friends or anything of the sort.

(in that respect i miss my jc days, when it's so easy to htht.)

[ed: added these in after reading a used-to-be-close friend's recent blog posts. i really do hope he's coping with his loss better, soon.]

[end of edit]

add that to my (now WRONG) realisation/conclusion that my mind should drift like deadwood so that i won't have emotional swings. my experiences and, more significantly, what i drew from them made me impervious to reflective thinking. but, i need those reflection skills BADLY. especially because design is starting to get more critical and realistic, plus i have the writing module (OMG I'M NOT CATCHING UP WITH THE CLASS AT ALL. PANICS.)

on the other hand, i'm really so glad i'm in usp. everyone there is seriously intelligent, more intelligent than me, i think. contrasts quite a bit with the average nus student (may i assume my course mates to represent the average.)

and, as my tutor says, the cutoff grades for admission to my faculty/school is now lower than for fass (the fabled 'dumping ground' for students who can't make it into any other course in nus, which now i think is SO UNTRUE. it is quite competitive, really). the real dumping ground is ...!

(can't wait for exchange, in that respect)

but, i suppose it's due to two factors. one, the usual straight-A dude/dudette would study med/law/acct/biz/engine/econs. two, the straight-A dude may not be visually/artistically inclined, being the textbook mugger he is (stereotyped, i know).

i wonder if i'm good enough to handle it, though. sigh.

OK BACK TO DRAFTING A 1000-WORD PAPER IN ONE NIGHT. OMG. hating this.

TOP 30 SEMI-FINALISTS

'BRAND NEW DAY' IS NOW TOP 30! :D

please continue to vote for the song, thank you!

cliff

YOG songwriting competition - please support =)

my friends and i have composed and arranged two songs as competition entries for the inaugural 2010 Youth Olympic Games :D

they're pretty good tunes (being as objective as possible) and yea, please support us!

especially when quite a lot of the other songs submitted are not up to scratch. like, boring run-of-the-mill mandopop-esque or nursery rhyme melodies that don't fit the words.

vote for 'brand new day' by milieu therapy (you have to ctrl+f to find it) and 'song for a champion' by archidudes!

very simple, just go to this website and vote!

http://singsingapore2010.nyc.sg/

thank you!

*just a quick explanation of the songs:

'brand new day' was conceptualised with the idea of having an ndp-like song. imagine stefanie sun singing at the national stadium, replete with pyrotechnics and dancing. and, the mv will have images of a clear blue sky and a nice large green field (marina barrage?) with nice sunlight, and youths running about and all.

the lyrics talk about one's dream actually coming true. and that one will 'shine in [one's] own way' in the heat of the competition. lots of positivity radiating from the song.

i also tried to break out from the usual, overused intro-verse-chorus-verse-chorus-bridge-chorusx2 that are 8 bars long for each part. i abridged the 2nd verse (since 2nd verses are usually quite boring) to introduce momentum. i used an uncommon chord throughout the song as well (to colour the song in a more vibrant and compelling shade).

'song for a champion' is a laid-back, heartfelt conversational song that climaxes towards the end. it's soft rock in style, very accessible. the lyrics are simple and meaningful as well. it's about a fellow sportsman-friend who who never fails to help whenever one's in need.

the song is masterfully recorded and produced by a mutual friend :) very clean and professional indie kind of sound.

the lyrics are brought out by the melody with undulations with note value to emphasise important words. such as the keywords 'look' and 'see' in the opening lines.

and, the song's easily reproducible live. possibly a very good thing for stage performances!

sem 2

i don't know why, i feel extremely stressed now (and school barely started.)

i think it's the song composition contest thingy that's stressing me so much. oh man.

i will be upset if the song doesn't make it through to the semis or finals. geez.

but school's quite fine so far. am looking forward to design/climate responsive. i have good tutors, yay.

not sure how i am going to squeeze in time for all these, i think somehow everything unravels themselves and everything will be fine, i am telling myself that now.

OK. BACK TO GARAGEBAND x_x

book reviews (3)

i had already read two caravans (or strawberry fields in usa/canada) by the same author prior to this.

both books are social/political commentaries about the author's home country, i guess. the social contexts depicted in both novels are similar: the protagonist is a ukrainian emigrant who lands up in uk, and grapples with, amongst other things, ideological and lifestyle differences with her counterparts who emigrated from the less developed/communistic side of ukraine.

the design of the books are amusingly soviet(?) in style: colours, graphics, alignment(??)

well, i mean, isn't the book cover important. as shallow as it sounds, things like that gives some indication of the substance within.

fluffy things aside, i guess lewycka's style is decidedly 'non-western' (if that is to mean, mainstream american or british) and is flavoured with eastern european. it's exotic, unrestrained, introspective, and real.

very often, the protagonist, nadezhda, would pepper the narrative with side, non-sequitur thoughts, which gives the narration appear more intelligent and thoughtful, or at least display awareness of the self.

what i found not very appealing, though, is the bits of ukrainian tractor history thrown in at various points throughout the novel. i felt it was really hard to draw parallels between the history extract and the happenings in the novel, in spite of the extract being opinionated, something about the author's views about capitalism, technology and the ukrainian government. i'm sure there is a purpose to the (boring) passages, though.

the characters, more often the antagonists, are caricatured. like, valentina is made out to be a fat voluptuous pink fluff ball with too much make up who tries to squander nadezhda's silly dad of all his money. which is similar to vulk from two caravans.

i felt that the novel did not reach a real climax, maybe not in the hollywood (heart-stopping) sense. somehow the conflicts introduced early on in the novel were sorted out gradually. like how nadezhda's dad finally sought for divorce from valentina, and how nadezhda patched up with her sister.

oh, come to think of it, the recollection of vera's childhood as told by nadezhda is memorable and poignant. it's probably the only serious long stretch of prose in the book, and it shed light about the then present, about why the sisters behave as such.

overall, i think the narration style is pretty much the most exciting bit about this novel. unlike the usual(?) novel which tends to summarise the thoughts of the characters, the characters in this novel are kept realistic by the constant insertion of little antics and thoughts.