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My name is ANG.ZHILIN.Turning 18 this year.Loving heartofGodchurch and D5.studying in nyjc 0832! |
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grow bigger and soar into the skies
And as I look into your eyesI see an angel in disguise Sent from God above For me to love To hold an idolise And as I hold your body near I'll see this month through to a year And then forever on Till life is gone I'll keep your loving near And now I've finally found my way To lead me down this lonely road All I have to do Is follow you To lighten off my load You treat me like a rose You give me room to grow You shone the light of love on me And give me air so I can breath You open doors that close In a world where everything goes You give me strenght so I stand tall Within this bed of earth Just like a rose And when I fell like hope is gone You give me strenght to carry on Each time I look at you There's something new To keep our loving strong I hear you whisper in my ear All of the words I long to hear Of how you'll always be Here next to me To wipe away my tears  Pst Kong is really awesomely awesome. I really do thank God that HOGC always has great amazing speakers coming in, even though we have the best speakers at home (: im really quite amazed about how Pst Kong preach and behaves. Being the great man of God, successful and influential, he is so so so humble. I still remember during Asia Conf, where we met him at the backdoor, he is really friendly man. i believe he is the true man of God who totally live out what the Bible say he is. never have i seen a man like him. why do we have to lose our relevance being stuck in the 1st space and become the enemy of the 2nd space and cannot reach the 3rd space. tomorrow is the last session. so gonna treasure it. and today... it just came in so timely. What to do when you don't know what to do. i believe everything is in God's control. good or bad, it is in His control. just like the story of Job. ytd went to Nicholas Nicole's hse to eat after service. he is so nice to bring valcheong and i two tubs of ice water for our heels-tortured-feets. and cook for us. yummmmy! then today is OBBB. it was TOTALLY fun man! amazed by the team who planned it. awesome. and all the jokes.. and my yi zhi mei ): HAHAHAH. just went totally crazy. Jacques and Fungqi are the emcees. it was hilarious man... and today seeing so many NYJC people coming, really exciting man. though like all from the rugby team.. hahahha! honestly, they were the least ppl i will thought of coming into church man. :P but God thoughts are higher than mine. (: God said: even if i lose everything, i cant lose God. i cant lose the obedience of God. have you ever lose your most loved. experience the heartache in your heart that is literally flowing out from emotions but not heart attack? God understands too. Because He went through the same thing when Jesus died on the cross. Now heavens, be open Our God is unshaken We worship, Christ risen High above Now heaven, be open All kingdoms, all nations Declare that "You are God last but not all, if you are my friend, pls pray for me the following points (: 1) CAST OUT ALL MY PIMPLES IN JESUS NAME! 2) able to focus on my studies the next 1.5month. very distracted! 3) wont grow fat from all junks food at 1am 4) ace my A level 5) get a job straight after A level ends * not in any order (: wahahahha!!! you know
If You're Not The OneIf you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today? If you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way? If you are not mine then why does your heart return my call? If you are not mine would I have the strength to stand at all? I never know what the future brings But I know you're here with me now We'll make it through And I hope you are the one I share my life with I don't wanna run away but I can't take it, I don't understand If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? Is there any way that I can stay in your arms? If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed? If I don't need you then why does your name resound in my head? If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life? If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my wife? I don't know why you're so far away But I know that this much is true We'll make it through And I hope you are the one I share my life with And I wish that you could be the one I die with And I'm praying you're the one I build my home with I hope I love you all my life 'Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today 'Cause I love you, whether it's wrong or right And though I can't be with you tonight You know my heart is by your side GRADUATION DAY IS COMING (: it should be right. it must be right
 everyone's exams are ending. when is mine ending? saw Weiren's fb and just got to know she went into Imperial College too.. wow! left only one month. i should put all my heart, soul and mind into my studies. and stop all distractions. especially those that are not worth it... exams exams... they are nerves breaking. they are the contributing factor to the increasing sucide rate among the kids. they are the monster that creep behind to scare you out of nowhere. they are the one who CAUSE MY PIMPLES!!!! they are the ones that make me cry. they are ones that make me go crazy and cranky. they are the ones that worsen my PMS. they are ones that... i don know la. HAHAHAHAHA. Should've said no It's strange to think the songs we used to sing The smiles, the flowers, everything is gone Yesterday I found out about you Even now just looking at you feels wrong You say that you'd take it all back, given one chance It was a moment of weakness and you said yes You should've said no, you should've gone home You should've thought twice before you let it all go You should've know that word, bout what you did with her Would get back to me And I should've been there, in the back of your mind I shouldn't be asking myself why You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet You should've said no, baby and you might still have me You can see that I've been crying And baby you know all the right things to say But do you honestly expect me to believe We could ever be the same .You say that the past is the past, you need one chance It was a moment of weakness and you said yes the indescribable pain the decision is made even if i stand alone im sorry this is life
                        Tonight I remember the times we spent together on those drives We had a million questions all about our lives and when we got to New York everything felt right I wish you were here with me tonight I remember the days we spent together were not enough and it used to feel like dreamin' except we always woke up Never thought not having you here now would hurt so much Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up I need your loving hands to come and pick me up And every night I miss you I can just look upand know the stars are holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight I remember the time you told me about when you were eight And all those things you said that night that just couldn't wait I remember the car you were last seen in and the games we would play All the times we spilled our coffees and stayed out way too late I remember the time you sat and told me about your Jesus and how not to look back even if no one believes us When it hurt so bad sometimes not having you here... I sing,"Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up I need your loving hands to come and pick me up And every night I miss you I can just look up and know the stars are holdin' you, holdin' you, holdin' you tonight www.loveangzhilin.tumblr.com it's time when everything ends. it's time to put a stop it's time to be truthful it's time to stop hiding since then, every night was a wait it was like an addiction something that seem impossible to get out of it but expectation was met with disappointment but nothing is perfect the tears that were shed could most probably formed an ocean even till now, the ocean is constantly refilled but God is a humourous God when i said i want to learn something He made sure i will learn it learn it for life, learn it by hard but inside human there is always a struggle who win who lose depends... we know where the line is once crossed, we are lost but denied it is difficult to let go though i told you to i will carry it forever in life but you pls dont start afresh praying and believing that's the only gift that i can give after climbing up the mountains and being dropped down from the sky where life is filled so irony and paradox God is still the one who never changed who understands the pain in the heart that comes from the inside out worse than stabbing it the light has come the dark shall go prepared to lose everything but gain the most valuable thing every decision made the first thought is never about me i never know i would fall so deep in so deep that im blinded thank God for you because i experience the extreme of life because i learn what giving all out is because i realised what is life at the end if you choose to hate i will still choose to love forever i love Pst Lia (:
TryIf I walk would you run If I stop would you come If I say you're the one would you believe me If I ask you to stay would you show me the way Tell me what to say so you don't leave me The world is catching up to you While your running away to chase your dream It's time for us to make a move cause we are asking one another to change And maybe I'm not ready CHORUS But I'm trying for your love I can hide up above I will try for your love We've been hiding enough If I sing you a song would you sing along Or wait till I'm gone, oh how we push and pull If I give you my heart would you just play the part Or tell me it's the start of something beautiful Am I catching up to you While your running away, to chase your dreams It's time for us to face the truth cause we are coming to each other to change And maybe I'm not ready If I walk would you run If I stop would you come If I say you're the one would you believe me Nadine kept singing this song. its stuck in my head again. tuition today was enjoyable. thks wenjun! he still had to burn sermon cd after tuition.. hahaha. commendable and i said we will give him a badge. hahaha met Pst Lia today.. and seriously... if she has nt asked me, i most probably still in the deep pit.. everyone is telling me im pessimistic and looked too stress for exams... the fact is that im stress over the fact im nt feeling stress at all. hahahah. i know, ironic. learnt that in GP.. hahah. to be honest, i know i need to have faith and face exams with faith. like pastors always say, you need faith when you need faith. simple as abc. but really thk Pst Lia, being so busy, still remember all my depressing tweets. wahahaha. school isnt that encouraging afterall. but thk God for tutors like mr ng, who keep saying everything is possible. oh yea, mr kwek too.. nt like some meanies. hahahhaa. i was reminded of the days i forced myself to study during O levels. even how much i hated it... i had the determination to do so. i pray i can find that determination in like 1 day man. a mask is created to beautiful. for its purpose is to hide the ugly side of Man. i made a mess out of my life. its time to slowly pick up and clear up. Loss
it's officially 35 days to A level. i think i kinda remember the days i countdown to O level.had GP tuition on friday, which made me cant go to marina barrage with D5. but the teacher gave us a compre passage, which is deep but good how many things have we lost in our lives. precious or not, tangible or not.. and each time we lose, human are always overwhelmed by emotions.. be it sadness or anger.. that is what some of us hate the most. to be under the control of our emotions. losses re-shape our lives, change our mindset, make us different again. is it human nature never to cherish and treasure. even if we have lose so many things in just one lifetime. and that we need to take deliberate actions to cherish, laziness sometimes cause us to forget. it's more impt to handle losses instead to prevent. because simply, there are just somethings you cant prevent. to stay in the safe zone, some people prepare their hearts to lose. they thought off the results beforehand... prepare their hearts and mind, to lessen the impact. be it a relationship or competition, they have a plan B in mind. i don like life staying in the safe zone. because life its all about taking risks and challenges. but it is practical to prepare their heart first isnt it.. but life will just be simple, bland, and... just it. no ups. no downs. today yesterday tomorrow is the same. maybe, i will choose to embrace it. because human are just afraid to lose. if we can open our mindset, knowing it is something bound to happen, and its part of life, will it be easier to handle losses? at that moment, just welcome depression. at that second, just cry your heart out. we just need the courage to face it, not the fear to escape from it. the Stoic thinkers advised to possess only what you dont mind losing. in this way, what is the point of possessing it. having something you dont love, the more you wont learn to treasure. stop clutching on apathy to cope with the high and lows. because this is the worst thing to do in life, not living to the fullest. all emotions are meant to be experienced. there will be no single soul who has not tasted sadness or happiness. if you are living, you wont be able to run away from any of the existing emotions. sometime, they might be the best things on earth because they are the factors that make your life up and down. 10 years down the road, when we look back into our lives, it's the high and lows that mark each stage of it. at 7 years old.. 16 years old.. 18 years old.. 21 years old... dont be so stubborn. somethings are meant to be let go. just let go. losing may mean gaining anyway. these emotions are temporary. but memories are forever. I guess I should've known better, to believe that my luck could change, Oh.I let my heart and forever Finally learned each other's names. I tell myself, "this time it's different." No goodbyes, cause I can't bear to say it."I'd never survive the one that's coming", If I stay, Oh no! Just Walk Away! Ooh, and don't look back. Cause if my heart breaks, It's gonna hurt so bad. You know I'm strong, but I can't take that. Before It's too late. Oh, just walk away Ooh, just Walk Away! I really wish I could blame you, But I know that it's no one's fault. A Cinderella with no shoe, And a prince that doesn't know he's lost. This emptiness feels so familiar Each goodbye, just the same old song But this time I will not surrender!' Cause I'm gone, I've got to let it go. Start protecting my heart and soul. Cause I don't think I'll survive a goodbye again. Not again! YES, I AM HERE (: hahahha my eyes are closing.. but got the urge to blog nonsense.. prelims.. don need to mention.. A level... sigh. my parents are ittm(irritating to the max). they keep asking which uni am i gg..... im uncertain myself if i can get into man.. ask them to prepare plan B. hahaha. hahaa. you just gotta listen to my rambles on studies.. cause that what my life is about now :( was going home on sat with some of the girls. qian, peggy, weiyin and i were all reminded of sec sch days... those stupid things we did.. hahaha. these are the ppl i spent life with. if i get a new phone.. im considering iphone or BB.. hahaha. both are good.. just hope they can combine the functions.. but there is quite a time.. we shall see. something is triggering my curiousity... i really want to know from the start to the end of the story... hahaha. but maybe its better nt to know.. but then..... you know human.. hahah. i believe life will be better after A.because there is a thousand things i wanna do. (: even if i walked into the pitched dark forest, i can still see the light of hope turn the world round and round
2 more days. :(life has not been greater with studying. missed the old sec school days. feel like im growing old. but on the other side, CG side has been great. growth and growth. cant wait for A to end (: (: (: but then... there shall and will be a plan B. let see how thing go... anyway, mommy has been gg church regularly and started f-up. COOL. it gotta be God. ohh yea. nt forgetting abt the dead sea scroll exhibition! simply amazed by the famous 5. thoughts just linked to the book Jasmine lend me- Cast of Characters. how ordinary ppl are being used by God in the bible, till now, it is still the same. once, someone told me, every sec now becomes your history. whether is history impt, it is debatable. some say forget the past and start afresh, some choose to learn a lesson from history. other may choose to bring history into present-dwelling in it. to me, what is done cannot be undone, cannot be forgotten. to start all over again is almost impossible. but a second chance is more sensible. whoever cherish, can start all over. whoever lose it, just forsakes everything. life oh life... hahaha. and.... JACQUES is saved! it just change my mindset all over. tt why i say life is still good (: GP-ISH
when panadol write there non-drowsy, it literally mean non-drowsy man.. just ate it but im like so awake and cant sleep. ): i want to ko also cannot... wrong things happen at the wrong time. GP papers today. compre was a killer. passage 2 is chim. p1 was okay.. " The world will be a better one without religion" discuss your view. when i smsed eloise that, she said she already know my stand before i told her. (: hahahahaha. okay.. was happily preparing to study at nlb after exams but end up watching i love you, beth cooper with my classmates! :/ so much for my determination to study.... sigh. nice show though. just stupid funniness that helps to destress.. going to yishun northpoint is fun. i met so ppl like jessica fungqi christopher... smallw world. tuition with denise and hannah is always fun (: enjoyable. was just talking how suay can few of us be for GP. tutorial kena agnes soh, remedial also her! -.- thks for sot. hahahahhaha. okay.off counting sheeps to sleep. gooodnight i cant believe there is another 2 months to A level. and 12 days to prelims. i cant wait for A level to end, but i don want A to come that soon. ironic yea... because im really so unprepared. kind of regret.not able to plan since j1. but since time has already pass, just gotta make the best out of it. but it just a very contradicting feeling. having the faith that i will do my best with God, yet on the other hand, worrying like mad. i cant imagine how life will be after A. i will just feel so much older. at least, there will be no such thing call uniform.. so much different for O level. its more than a 360degree difference. of course, thinking back, O is so much easier. that is life. after A, i think i will feel the same too. it is just how much im stuck inside. but during O, there is a diff feeling.. maybe because of many of us from prss are taking together. or maybe because the requirement for A is much diff. or maybe because... im just not that good like the past. but every stage of life is a good experience. no matter if the results will be good or bad, i still gotta face it and move on. there are always alternatives. hope is the right hand of faith. im holding on tightly. just hope the best out of everything. i hope i can do that...
a change is a change. change usually are permanent. be it good or bad. i hope for good changes in life though. but doesnt mean bad changes dont come knocking on my door. perspectives comes in different angles. right or wrong, depends on God. but different people hold different views. as we change, we see things differently. so isnt perspective a variable? expectations. benchmark. standards. can one expect from the other? who are we to expect from people. if they cant meet the expectations, who are we to blame and criticise? but expectation is not evil. it is in your opinion. certain things in life just lies in the grey area. what you say is logical. what he say sound logical too. what she say seems right too. even though all of them dont agree with each other. how can we decide what we want...
the starting of the end
just finished watching hotel for dogs on my laptop. nice show (:mye has ended. the 2 weeks mental torture was terrible. the worst feeling you ever can have for exams is going in unprepared, knowing you will fail. time flies. it july! im trying to imagine myself mugging for A level. thinking back of O level years... big difference. at least, during O level, there is a bunch of good friends from the same family able to support each other almost 24 hours. homiletics class was good. able to learn from Pastors and Charleston. and tomorrow! Dr Ar Bernard is coming church. almost everyone in the world will and should know him. im looking forward to his services. has 2009 passed faster than 2008? i feel so though. maybe its the busy-ness that kept all of us move so fast we lost track of time. turning 16 is different from turning 18. a lot of mentality and thinking will change. perspectives and opinions takes a 360 degree change. but there are still some values we still need to keep. whatever we do in ministries is to build people. and never make use of people of build anything. abilities and capabilities can be replaced easily by anyone, but the heart and attitude is difficult to duplicate. we are and shall be identified by our hearts which will not fade, and not abilities that are just accessories. it does not matter that much to me anymore about roles and status. one day you are the president of the state, another day you are replaced. but i guess, what i do in my life writes tells more about myself. for the King of love
if hope is the left hand of faith, i am holding on tightly. if love is the right hand of faith, i am catching it more.exams are ending soon. yes, SOON. not like misspeggyang. hahaha. and qianqian did such a life-shocking thing this month! hahhaa. this weekend was good. except the fact that i had econ paper1 on sat morning. and valerie got sent home for her excited fever. hahaha. summer prog ended. homiletics class on sun morning. services. thats life. thats my life. had fun hanging out with ppl like Elosie, Yiying and Valerie Ang. d5 is growing big and strong. i need healing over my pimples seriously. it's like so so long. ): and when one goes, another one comes. tsk. ): some organisation of thought and shaking of heart need to be done. new mindset, new thinking. visions and dreams dies. but shall be revive. all i need is just a key to unlock the door. the door that traps the answer. a radical spirit again. a radical spirit again. if my mind and heart say no, but God says yes. the answer shall be and is a yes. a time of torture.
catching my breathe...what a week of exams. mentally being tortured badly. i thought last years mye was bad enough, this year was worst. im prepared to go remedial everyday. but life will still be good (: i will make it through. hahahaha this week passed quite fast yea.. and for the first time in my life im having exams on SATURDAY. i wonder does MOE approve that for govt school.. hahaha. at least it dont start at 8am... it's whirl and twirl everywhere. some laws and regulations gotta come into my life man. it just gonna be a time of overcoming. in times adversity, you see real faith. you see real friends. you see real growth. as long as you overcome. how much does your life worth? Give me these generations
building the foundations for the breakthroughs
taking the few minutes to blog before H&C.i cant wait for Pastor Joakim's services. it will be totally awesome. (: and Pastors will be back! as you grow older, you starts to see more in life yea. things are just not that simple after all. i remember Pastor How said before, keep a simple heart, but not a simple mind. a pure heart. life is just complicated and simple at the same time. Faith has been awesome. seeing her getting more and more radical for God each day.. it really warm my heart. and how Venus starts to get revelations from God. simply amazing. actually i cant wait for this year to pass. but i gotta remember this whole year is fundamental because it builds up all the foundation for breakthrough. 2009 2009 2009 oh, ytd back home, i had a scaaaary ride. thank God Ivy was with me. more is yet to come. (: King David's heart
yesterday ops meeting is so powerful that i must tell you! hahahaYassy shared something so powerful. as if it brought something out of my heart that i myself has been hiding and denying about. coming clean before God and worship was good. life is going to move on. even it is A level year. (: hanging around in church is cool. because it just feel so home. Gigal Bethel Jericho Jordan Canan.. i miss Pastors! seeing their tweets, im sure they have a fun time. (: tomorrow is the day, the coming back of Pastors. hahahaha. okay.. back to mugging. (: LIVE UP TO EXPECTATIONS OF
DEO camp ended. school is starting soon. exams are coming too. how i wish holidays can be extended. planning for the week now. God created human so that they need to eat and sleep. i wonder if any one day, someone will invent a pill so that human need not eat and sleep. i will be first in queue to buy. but since God planned 24hours as one day and one night, it should be and supposedly to be enough.had service learning super early in the morning today at Jalan Kayu. the weather is so so so horrible. it was quite fun.. seeing all the kids. i pinched some of their face when they walked past. (: so cute. i need the peace of God man. i could literally hear the noise in my head buzzing in the ears. it is like a never ending talking sound which constantly nag inside of me. gets me easily irritated. i don wanna close my eyes.... haha Live up to God's expectation. not to human's. after the weekend, this seriously is gonna be my crusade man. i guess no matter where you go, in church or in school, we tend want to live to people's expectation and standard instead of God's. either just because we care too much what others think and how people judge. what i don equals to what he say what she say what you say, the more human wanna meet other's expectation. but it is tiring to live up to men's expectations. because you can never do it. you do it once, but not forever. i am not living for you. i am living for God. if this is so, i am not here to please all mankind. the hour hand hand turns 2 rounds everyday.however, since the creation of earth, it never understands each movement it make, affects so many lives. the minute hand move routinely from Genesis to Revelation, but it didn't know by slowing down, just make people feel better. maybe time need to rest one day too. Who is the Designer?
Even the smallest snowflake is designed with scrupulous care, such that no two snowflakes are alike, yet most are perfectly symmetrical. is it merely coincidence?Our DNA 97.5% similar to mice and rats, and 33.1% similar to a lettuce. Look at yourself in the mirror now! Do you think you look a third like a lettuce?! Isn't it amazing how just a little tweak to your DNA structure will turn you to a small furry mouse? Is it really chance that made you a man and not anything else? You're here because someone programmed your DNA to be that way. 2.5% of your DNA was deliberately changed so you would not be small and furry. Mother Teresa is widely remembered for her selfless acts of kindness to aid the needy in India. Compassion like that of this dear lady is a commodity that we witness in many. But could such developments of kind hearts be accidental? Is it by chance that a degree tilt in the axial of the Earth would make the Earth's surface temperature too harsh to support life? Salt is made up of Sodium and Chlorine- both are poisonous when taken individually. But how is it possible that when you combine them, you get a daily essential? every single part of Earth, every single creation is amazing. it is more than a coincidence. it is more than a wonder. Valerie Cheong once said, every one has two eyes, one nose and one mouth. Yet, God can create millions and million of people who have different features and look. even twins are different. You are specially designed. You are specially created. You are unique. Because of the Designer. God is the Designer. (: Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope Labels: from: Design By Chance this is my call
service with Pst Troy Marshall today is awesome. revelation and revelation. breaking through. cant wait for him to preach during revival night. (:Won’t You, Lord Take a look at our hands? And everything we have Use it for Your plans Won’t You, Lord Take a look at our hearts? Mold it, Refine it As You set us apart We want to run to the altar And catch the fire To stand in the gap between the living and the dead Give us a heart of compassion for a world without vision We will make a difference Bringing hope to our land We will answer the call to build this church without walls let Your glory be shown bring salvation to the lost to the lost this month is up and downs. training after training for cafe. outings after outings. but yet, without the touch of God, everything is fruitless. discipleship class with Pastors is great and will be greater. strong love corrects, weak love compromise. I rmb Pst How tweet "Today Rinnah lives in the world I create. In 30 years, I will live in the world she creates" this is our call. building the next generation to be radical. venus.. faith.. kimberly...elizabeth... these people are going to be amazing. this is the purpose. follow ups after follow ups... awesome. (: because every lesson will change life. it is not just an impact, because impact is just a strong emotion of loving the word of God. but change will be for eternity that marks in one's life. from word to actions. it takes more than a step. be a king-maker. Psalm 143
1Hear my prayer, O LORD, Give ear to my supplications! In Your faithfulness answer me, And in Your righteousness. 2 Do not enter into judgment with Your servant, For in Your sight no one living is righteous. 3 For the enemy has persecuted my soul; He has crushed my life to the ground; He has made me dwell in darkness, Like those who have long been dead. 4 Therefore my spirit is overwhelmed within me; My heart within me is distressed. 5 I remember the days of old; I meditate on all Your works; I muse on the work of Your hands. 6 I spread out my hands to You; My soul longs for You like a thirsty land. Selah 7 Answer me speedily, O LORD; My spirit fails! Do not hide Your face from me, Lest I be like those who go down into the pit. 8 Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning, For in You do I trust; Cause me to know the way in which I should walk, For I lift up my soul to You. 9 Deliver me, O LORD, from my enemies; In You I take shelter. 10 Teach me to do Your will, For You are my God; Your Spirit is good. Lead me in the land of uprightness. 11 Revive me, O LORD, for Your name’s sake! For Your righteousness’ sake bring my soul out of trouble. 12 In Your mercy cut off my enemies, And destroy all those who afflict my soul; For I am Your servant. too much to contain
june holidays are here. nope, im not excited at all. not a single bit. the month is already packed. the worst comes after holiday ends. its more than a nightmare.too many things coming at the wrong time. expected outcomes at unexpected timing. ironic. a hypocritcal place will not have true love. among the double minded, you cant find the truth. the feeling of fake-ness. step out of the circle and see. you feel so much relieved. it is overwhelming. the feeling of not knowing where to start from, the feeling of not able to meet up with standards, the feeling of not excelling... the bottle is bursting. the worst thing in life is be like a puppet. every action, every move and even every word you say... cant be from yourself. what is the purpose of you then. Tonight is the last night to a new one
it seem like long weekend. with overdose of high-ness. hahaha.scooping the B&J ice-cream gives you muscle. yay! nua-ing on my bed now. HQ is gonna be long. im not sure how and what will happen for the following weeks. but everything is possible. (: i realised that when you cross the boundary, you really crossed it. there is no turning back. well, just continue walking on then. God always provides an alternate route. things will be fine. i just hope time pass by real slowly.i don know how to endure to A level man! arrrrrrrrr. anyway, my house is complete. i need to go ikea decorate my new room. because its so plain! see le also sian. i need colourful things. i hope i know how to draw. but given my arts skills... maybe next time. hahah Remember The Titans
math tutorial was cancelled today. (:finished watching the movie, Remember The Titans, today during CT. good movie. worth watching once, worth watching twice. cafe duty is a little disastrous today. well... but the video sermon was awesome. more than what Bill Wilson said about a shepherd's heart, he said that somethings just don't come till the very last minute which struck my heart. it was a great. studying geog is good. (: because it let you understand how is everything on Earth formed and works. it set you thinking how did God creates all these. (: too much politics everywhere. politics ain't just confined to the government. to some, it is normal because they grow up with it. to some, they find it a war in the world. to some, they find it meaningless. but no one can differentiate whether if it is right or wrong, good or bad now. its a grey area. out of the blue
hard-core blogger. (: reminds me of one of my friend commenting about hard-core muggers. hahha.at the airport now, doing my tutorials. taking a break from it. assembly was quite interesting today because one interesting incident. hahahha. being at the airport make me want to go for a trip, out of singapore. and i know the secret of breaking through spot the diff. scores now. HAHAHAH. thanks to Annlynn. (: pondering on many things recently. found out that trust and love must come together. no love, no trust. no trust, no love. but sometime, there might be exception. well, i guess there will always be. and loving someone that you do not trust totally is like walking at the edge of the cliff. dangers. fears and skeptical. our gp teacher like to ask us to think think think. why is this like that and why is that like this. is it in human instinct that they like to strive and fight for power and status. no matter in a large scale like a nation or a small scale like a organisation, where there are people, surely there is a war for power. when you get involved, you hope to back out. but when you back out, you hope to be in it. because none will want to lose out. it is appalling to see how many will put on a mask to cover their convetousness. im using annlynn's laptop to blog. after being trapped in the cave for so long, using internet again seem wierd. i must integrate myself back to the internet world. sadly to say, i still need to stay at my aunt's house for another week. :( it's okay. i suddenly remember someone said, when you start forgetting many things in your schedule, you know that you are not living your life. it is time to re-organise. let click refresh. life is mundane. i need some spice and everything nice. hahahhaha. im just going crazy here goodbye! going for tuition. overweight mind
staying at my aunt's house now for a week. with no internet, im seriously dying there. good chance to study, but there is no study table. -.- this week passes quite fast. which might be a good thing.every minute pass equals to one minute closer to A level. the sudden urge to blog is gone. hahha. i had thousand to say, but nothing is coming into my mind now. all i can think of are the thousands of undone tutorials. mye is coming. soon, A level will be here. the whole world is bombarding me with the qns of how well i can do. it is either i grab the time now or not... hahaha. focus focus focus. one big elephant. two big elephant. three big elephant. four big elephant. 1000 big elephant. if time is to turn back 1.5 years, maybe things can be much better. i guess. im not sure either. can't wait for my new and beautiful room though. yea, hope it is beautiful. a thought came into my mind. a powerful leader is someone who can boldy admit their mistakes, admit their weaknesses, willing to take on challenge, knowing their strengths maximising their abilities, yet humble. in life, there is no refresh button. Philippians 4:7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. i seriously need it. taylor meet coldplay
Mervin showed me this. wow! i think it is seriously nice (: i can see what you thought i could not
come look into my house and you will faint on the spot man. renovation started. it is like you have a home but you cant go home. so irritating. how am i going to survive man.arrr!anyway, sunday was Pst Lia's birthday celebration. it was good afterall. (: well, just look forward to mama's day. hahaha! co can do it man. went for zhu zha tang supper with Valerie and Hongrui on sunday night. because after everything, we are starving. and it is quite interesting to go with them, because we were arguing should we go, how to go home, wht to eat. and while eating, Hongrui is serious joker that Valerie and I nearly puke out our food in front of each other. hahaha! but it was really an enjoyable night. let's grow and mature. in every aspect of our life. sometime, we need to start all over again. and again. and again. and the ones who will celebrate your success and put behind the past with you are the ones you know they love you. the ones who keep reminding you of your past and put down your success, are the ones who have been waiting for your fall. but you gotta thank them, because they are the ones that help you grow in strength and in resilience. so lift up your head and see. technology slaves
my house is in a great mess! mom is renovating the house and she is throwing all the sofas, wardrobe cupboards away. my clothes are everywhere... my books... argh.the worse, i got to move to my aunt's house for a week. it is bad because her house does not have an air-con! WAAAAA. faint. and no washing machine! it is really dino age. ok..im mean. but you gotta admit that when you are used to live with technology, you cant do without it. esp air-con in singapore. it is a necessity, not a luxury good. (: i read the magazine and realised Pst Lia's birthday is also Earth Day! and Levis' white tab jeans that are kind of environmental friendly, costs more than a red tab. arent ppl more attracted to red tab then... well. this week is seriously a long and tiring week. meeting Pst Lia tomorrow after service. excited for it! (: but there is college day which spoil my sat. because cannot pon! ): my new resolution: not to watch tv for the next 8 month, starting from today. and only 15mins for spot the diff everyday. hahahahaha! yes, i can. this whole week is packed. ct was talking about our econ tutor again. well, it seems that the school is quite determined not to change our econ tutor. the tap game on Camy's itouch is addictive. oh man. i dont know if i can survive man. if today is just the start
This is my prayer in the desertWhen all that's within me feels dry This is my prayer in my hunger and need My God is the God who provides And this is my prayer in the fire In weakness, or trial, or pain There is a faith proved more worth than gold So refine me Lord through the flame I will bring praise I will bring praise No weapon formed against me shall remain I will rejoice, I will declare God is my victory and He is here This is my prayer in the battle When triumph is still on its way I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ So firm on His promise I'll stand All of my life in every season You are still God I have a reason to sing I have a reason to worship And this is my prayer in the harvest When favour and providence flow I know I'm filled to be emptied again The seed I receive I will sow this coming week is seriously like packed. hahhaa. it is packed one week before. i just realised how scary my thoughts can be when you feel down. i wonder if Jesus nearly fainted when He read it in my mind. fake twins can think quite alike yea. hahahha. there is a big elephant in my head. thanks to people who really really dont know how to think and talk. i guess, jumping into the river, no one will believe im innocent. well, from now onwards. no, it was from 2 weeks ago, i declare im free. HAHAHAH. yea. you think all is crap. Proverbs 24:11-13 (New Living Translation) 11 Rescue those who are unjustly sentenced to die; save them as they stagger to their death. 12 Don’t excuse yourself by saying, “Look, we didn’t know.” For God understands all hearts, and he sees you. He who guards your soul knows you knew. He will repay all people as their actions deserve. ZAC EFRON. (:(:(:(:
  watched 17 again with fungus. seriously, Zac Efron is super handsome. his bewitching blue eyes are really extra ordinary beautiful. throughout the movie, your eyes will be like fix on him only. hahaha. today is a great day. (: with Venus, with Faith. with hope, it will just be the beginning. one part of school
school had a carnival today. i didnt know until this week. hahah. not alot of people as expected. the crowd was there to see our beloved tutors get dunk! (:apparently, the ever popular, hottest teacher that Huiyu adores, Mr William Yeo, got dunked 6times. it was quite a pity that Denise, Shimin, Bunny and i were all in consultation. we missed the climax. Mr Yeo walked out of staff room with a chui look. and walked back, drenched, with a even more chui look. it was amusing. didnt catch Mr Gerald. what a pity too. HAHAHA. Shimin is geting mean-er day by day. she said flashflood will occur when our not so beloved econs tutor get dunked. obviously, she didnt get. maybe the council is afraid there is a need for extra costs to the hospital. there is tarot card booth too. and the person refer to a book to interpret the cards. HAHAHA. super funny. all of us stood there and were -.- i love week B. because they are shorter compared to week A. during geog tutorial, we had fieldwork. and i saw a bird, on the pavement, injured. i thought it was hatching an egg before stepping closer to see. all of us dont even know what to do. i don even dare to touch that black bird. Mr Yeo also! in the end, the bird's bffs came to save his day. i dont know how. but i saw alot birds gather and the injured bird disappear. cool yea. we were still thinking will the road sweeper will throw it away. hahahah thats all i really know
i got a big pimple on my forehead ): i never got so many pimples in such short time. hahaha. yea. now its like one per month. hahahahahatoday had the interview with a researcher from NUS. it was fun and enjoyable. and hearing her share about her life in UK, it is interesting. hearing a different opinion, hearing someone who lives across the vast ocean, hearing someone who has a different skin colour. yesterday night, i dropped my laptop on the floor. ohh man! i nearly fainted. my computer is already a retard, i dont hope it become a vegetable. i think the season is fading away. it didnt fade away glamorously i guess. to my point of view. just quietly. when there are ups, there will be down. life can be so mundane that you just hope you have not missed out the previous opportunity. but what is gone, is gone. my weaknesses are made perfect in God's strength, i just need to have faith in it. not seeing does not mean it will not happen. it is just the matter of time. it is just the matter of my patience. here i am waiting
every week seems to pass routinely. one day gone, another day come. and then, it is gone again. maybe, i need some spice and everything nice. (:FASS from NUS gave talk on ytd. taking in only 1600 students, with current situation, i will need a miracle from God. but it is still not impossible. today on the bus, i read a quote and it says, people will tend to strive to create the world they like or want to live in. quite true. sometime, life can get quite busy, or quite mundane, or quite routine, or even quite exciting and happening, that we tend to forget the purpose of what we are doing. i need the touch from heaven. right down to my soul. this is the calvary
"If all my friends to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them, I'd be at the bottom to catch them. "read the above in Dominic's blog quite some time ago. this is really what you mean by true friends. (: HQ today was good. and long. hahaha. from thursday to sunday, everyone are like busy ants and bees. but afterall, it was worth everything. met Ivan in the lift today to church. and he mentioned the harvest this time is different, in a good way. and i thought of it, and we both agreed it is because of incubation. then during HQ, Jieru talked about Sharyl Kate Kua Pejun(to let you know her NEW full name(: ), how she had incubated so many friends and are now all planted. moral of story: incubation, 4th dimension really really really really works. really really. and is really really. i seriously love Pastor How's sermon this weekend. the anointing was strong on sat. there was something different. more than the anointing. anyway, it kind of wierd without John. and of course, it is kind of wierd seeing him botak! hahahahahha! Pst Josh Kelsey's blog is a must read man. (: today is the release of pw results. Easter Hangout is back again! great harvest. with about 27 new friends. HQ will be exciting. (: ohh well! today is like a long day man. took Fifi's car home as its on the way. had a nice chat with her. (: seeing how D5 make the boxes, they are really awesome. it is petrifying to see how friends will want to see their friends fall just for the status and glory. but worse, having an angelic face but evil heart, hoping their friends fall, boosting their ego. how much is trust then. snippets
i just read Nadine's blog about her CG. wow, i think it is really powerful and zai man. during H&C, it was about Bingrong too. hahaha.finished the stupid get smart set 1. econs can get quite interesting, if you don take them for exams. hahaha. today GP is kinda interesting. talking about news all over the world. a paradox is that many of us live happily ever after everyday in our first world nation, giving litte notice to the hurts across the boundaries. even we do, little do we understand. anyway, there are Only For Ladies parking lots. and Honding asked, isnt the world talking about equality. like hello?!!! ladies you know. hahahhaha. OH YA! got my smart card. and it is like -.-. they used our pri sch photos. and no giro! sian. Let's celebrate together!
 EASTER is coming! Let's celebrate it together! who say only Christians celebrate Easter! Let's celebrate together! This Friday! 3-5pm at heartofGod church with me! This Saturday! 5-7pm at heartofGod church with me! 100% no regrets. :) this is where you should go. find out more! :) we invite you with:  15mins of the new day
my clock marks 5mins of the new day. so i shall blog fresh about ytd. hahaha.service with Pst Lia is totally awesome. in click with my prayers. just like an answer from above. :) oh, im back into tuition ministry, and with my long lost tuition mate, Nadine. with a new tutor, Wenjun. life will be good. today seems like a long day. because cg started at 10am in the morning! had quite a few leftovers cafe. not a very good news. everything can be better. my brain is not working. school end at 5pm tml! what a great way to start a monday. im having monday blues now. hahah! im trying to breakthrough my scores for spot the diff. on fb. which is like so difficult. :( a minute of life
the weather is sickening.today cafe duty was good. Yenny is super funny. she is like the adviser for so many. today service is exceptionally special. well, not to mention the after service teaser. :) EASTER IS COMING! know more about it! im feeling terrible. so i shall sleep early! i suddenly miss stella chan in cafe. but i never forgot she nearly made me trip in the middle of the audi. hhaha!!! will ever fallen leaves turn green again. young and sweet :)
today, out of bored-ness during break, Denise and i decided to play pranks with Hannah's phone, using her ever free smses. :] haha!and i smsed Fungqi first, but she was too slow in replying. and i thought of Chewting. heeehee. i think the classic was Denise's friend. anyway, this morning as i took the bus to school, had this thought. we are all growing old! im thinking back of people like Muying, Fungqi, Peijun and everyone from prss. we are now 18. it feels we are still 16 yesterday. and we are really like growing old, growing big, growing tall, growing crazy, growing mature. i need to constantly remind myself we are 18. hahaha! yea. this is it man. did i tell you my tutor pangseh me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she is supposed to come today! -.- first time i got pangseh-ed by a tuition teacher... okay, im also getting better at spot the difference in fb day by day. i managed to reached round 2 yesterday okay... heavy. heavy. heavy.
our enthu econs department has started their prog. and mr nawadni said it will guarantee results in 5 weeks, or not he will apologize to us. i will remember his words. :)organic chem test tomorrow. organic chem is disaster man. they are like meant for aliens. today is a tiring day. but suki sushi with zone D is great. all the nonsense and everything. hahhaa. just finished dinner. continuing with organic chem. or should i say starting on. Charlotte is so cutttte today! dont expect people to do what you cannot do. need breakthroughs. need increase. need power of God. need anointing. starry starry night....
starry starry night...isnt it amazing to see how much a person can change. well, no matter good or bad. im amazed to the extent how much each can change like 360 degree. even upside down. well, most probably, humans will loves masks alot. because they use it often, even if it is invisible on their face. a mask hides. hide your shame, your motive, your evilness. starry starry night... ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH. im going crazy!!!!!!!!!! over every single thing! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! save me save me save me. arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! sometimes... at some moments... at some points, all you ever need was a little more faith to believe. and all your ever need to do was to keep believing. yawns. school re-open has been okay. got 2 Us for BT. obviously, life is not going to be easy with the ever crazy, enthusiastic, torturous and sadist math department. there is really a need to set some priorities right. okay, urgent need. things in life are getting rocky. life is much worse when both sides dont understand what you are going through and keep pressuring you. it does not matter how you start the race, but how you end it. but when you dont start well, you know through the journey, it is challenging, difficult, demanding, taxing to end it well. hey my skin cells!
to my poor little piece of skin on my foot:sorry that i didnt take care of you, please rest in peace. though your corpse is black, at least you are not lost. beloved,zhilin waaaaaaaa! i dont know why when how did i cut my leg today during duty. i hate it because troubles come when bathing. ohh well. byee, skin cells. mommy loves acting cute
i think recently, my mom like to act cute.d odds chalet was coming and i told her im going... so.. me:thurs got chalet, im staying over. mom:so you not coming back until fri? me:yeap mom:ok.. so you going chalet on thurs ar? me:yes mom:so you not coming back on thurs night? me: YES! -.- yesterday night... me: im coming home to sleep cause tml got school mom:where are you then?school camp ar? me: chalet la.. mom:why you coming back to sleep? when? me:tml got school, not so early mom:ok. so when you coming back me: not so early!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she kept making me repeat what i said again and again. arrgh. yes, i didnt stayover for chalet in the end. BUT... I OVERSLEPT FOR THE STUPID ECONS LECTURE! i set my alarm so much earlier! and when i open my eyes, i asked myself, why is the sky so bright. -.- SIAN. i should stayed over then. arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr! kill me. one week really flies. faster than the flies. back to school....... =((((((((((( Everything in its time
Sometimes I wonder what lies aheadHow long till my hunger is fed They say it's hard to make it in this part of town So many people on this merry-go-round Some folks try astrology Some turn to crystal balls To find an answer, To get through it all I just fall on my knees and I try to pray In the silence I can hear Him say The river runs and the river hides Out to the ocean and under the sky I promise you, the answer will come Hold on to patience and watch for the sign Everything in its time I often feel like I'm two steps behind Somebody must have moved that finish line There are a thousand reasons Why I should give up But I'm stubborn in the things I believe The river runs and the river hides Out to the ocean and under the sky I promise you, the answer will come Hold on to patience and watch for the sign Cause maybe there's another plan One I still can't see A little surprise,like your love in my life Funny how time changes how we see last lesson of discipleship class today. with Charleston. ohh man. i seriously will miss classes. though short, but Charleston said something that hit right into my heart. zone D and F bought guitar hero world tour and xbox 360 for Dominic! hahaha. it is great to see how happy our leader is. at the mrt, i suddenly felt so so giddy that i cant see what is in front of me. haha. super malu. sweet Sharyl rushed to the washroom with me. paying extra 70cents. HAHAHA. status and fame is nothing. because the God has the highest glory. and you know behind it, you need to pay a price for it. what you see is not what you see. what you hear is not what you hear. behind the curtains, there is more.  Hello!im in class now. Haha.beside me is hannah and shimin.math tutorial is boring! 1 2 3
have you played with Barbie dolls? when i look at Pst Josh Kelsey, he reminds me of Barbie doll boyfriend, Ken. haha! now im thinking of the song what if cartoons get saved?but Pst Josh is awe-inspiring! the way he pray, the way he speak, the way he act. something is different in him. what he preached was great. for both days, it set me deep into thoughts and reflections. monday was cg leaders' outing. sushi buffet!!! im craving for it again today! =( and the conversation went to 3names convo. -.- maybe we shld have just catch a movie.... haha! and on on and on. and i really want to shop man! is it a need or a want? haha. had some stupid financial thing today in school... credits cards and everything. i need to plan my finances. =D though quantity is little. HAHA today is IC graduation night. and honestly, the whole event is really zai. so much exciting than i expected. the skit was kind of....haha! i forgot what im supposed to say... in the end, chaos. but thinking of it, im still laughing! hahahahha! everyone had fun. today in school, Shimin asked me the names of teletubbies(is it spelt like this?!) ans: tinky winky, dipsy, lala, po. if you said tipsy! HAHAHA. then you get a drunk dipsy. hahahahaha! today is tiring. but fufilled. well, im been thinking of wht Pst Josh preached during the weekends till now. all i ask for is a mustard seed-a seed of faith. all i need is to just believe. over the fence
i felt like blogging then i dont. then now i want. =Dshopping on friday night with Huimin and Karen for IC training. it was really enjoyable man. =) walked all around orchard. no doubt, it is time for shopping again. if i have the time though. i dont wanna miss the new arrivals. HAHAHAHA! there are really tons of nice clothes and esp shoesssssssss! i guess outing with huimin are always that fun! she is such a lovely girl! went to marks and spencer and saw their super cute Easter chocs! i like the bunny one. the first one i thought of is Rinnah. hahha! and Chiwen just told me its been there very long. -.- i missed so many good movies. i want to watch! Friday was release of A level results. went to hall to listen to our principal's talk. though i cant rmb a single thing. oh oh! honour roll was the highlight. John and Shipei are real wow wow man. before the release, the atmosphere in the hall is light. unexpected. but as if the nervousness and anxiousness are all hidden behind the jokes and laughters. because you can still sense heaviness in the bouyant surrounding. but at least it motivate me in some way or another. well, to study harder. i remember O levels days, we did the same thing. it just make you feel, you dont wanna lose. went for zone f service today. it was really great. loving life... Pst Josh Kelsey was awesome too. believe. it just kinda link some of the things together which hit right into my life. well, things need to move on. breakthrough. get out. be solved. problems that are not solved for so long, are they still called problems then? i believe if you want to do something, be the best at it. Laissez-Faire
today lessons are kind of relaxing though. watched a documentary about North Korea today during GP. honestly, it is really exaggerating to see how the North Koreans idolise their great leader as they called it to be. it is even to the extent of worship. my gp teacher commented it is almost like worship service. no doubt, almost there. just that they are really... overstated.it is a must watch thing man. maybe you have never seen a North Korean before. catch it on national geographic then. between N.K and S.K, they have the greatest landmines with electric fence. no cell phones or internet. propaganda is everywhere on the streets. i gotta say i cant understand them for loving and worshipping someone who brought so much misery in their lives. even cataracts is a norm among the kids where outside, cataracts is not even a worrying problem for the olds. it mentioned something, that you cant differentiate if the people are acting this way out of real faith or out of real fear. but, because of the brainwashing, it has no difference anyway. back to our globalised world. i ran 2.8km yesterday. for the first time of 3 mths, i finally turned up for the running lessons. -.- and im walking like a duck the whole of today because my legs are aching... seriously man, i dont wanna U-turn just because of BT man. argh. things are going to change 360. or maybe it has in some ways. well, certain things dont look that simple as it used to be. well, globalisation maybe- no boundaries. then who can i tete-a-tete with... rolling all around
perplexed but...finished GG season 1. inpsired by Jasmine Oh, trying to chiong my integrations... tutorials. HAHA. im so gonna be prepared to go for remedials everyday.... argh. tomorrow isnt gonna be any better with pe. the teacher have not seen me for such long time. but who cares. one bad news today. didnt even know who to tell. but i turned to my almost 6 yrs buddy. maybe like wht Jasmine say... you just need to prove to them. life still goes on, no matter how much i hate school. so why not embrace troubles and frustrations with open arms. it might just make you feel better. looking at the unseen, for they are eternal. the question of how
today is a sleepy day. it feel like the first day of school. and monday blues, math remedial today.which is math lecture. teaching on complex numbers. no wonder its called complex. argh. every lesson, i just feel like sleeping. all because i stayed up watching GG. haha! AI was simply awesome. and i cant wait to see Pst J.K again! it is kind of wierd blogging at this time. but i need to overcome my self-induced jet-lag or i will forever sleep during classes. life can be so exciting yet so mundane. like fallen down right to the pit, seriously need to get up again. fight. search for the energy to fight. just like standing boundary of the desert. cross the high mountain and you will find the river. aint that easy man. the mountain... walk into the sea please. time is busy men's and idling men's enemy. now is the time. time for overcome. time to conquer. time for breakthrough. let me see Your glory, oh Lord.  when good girl turns bad
service on friday make it feel like saturday. make my weekends feel longer. haha.what do we have up now. let see. a season of endurance or a season for maturity. maybe the latter. either overcome it.. or may lose it. my eyes are shutting but i really want to finish gossip girl by weekend for season 1. im almost there. well... quite near. welcome upper east siders. my mom is planning to renovate our house. but like this year?! what a great timing. my room will be occupied by contractors instead of the mugger. i want my room to be green with tv and cable and computer and a big wardrobe. hahaha! maybe i should get another wardrobe and aim to fill it up asap. sound good. studies are impt. but we are not slave to our academic. often, human create the things but at the end of the day,it isnt in humans control. just like the economy i guess. studies are impt but the purpose of studying isnt to get all As for yr exams right? isnt education meant to educate? studies are impt but it should never stop you to being radical. how important studies are? they might not be that impt without exams. in this world. then i thought of boundaries. boundaries are imaginary. boundaries are artificial. boundaries are limitations. to everything. no more xoxo. i shall sleep now. xoxo gossip girl!
Who Am I- Casting CrownsWho am I? That the Lord of all the earth, Would care to know my name, Would care to feel my hurt. Who am I? That the bright and morning star, Would choose to light the way, For my ever wandering heart. Not because of who I am, But because of what You've done. Not because of what I've done, But because of who You are. I am a flower quickly fading, Here today and gone tomorrow, A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapor in the wind. Still You hear me when I'm calling, Lord, You catch me when I'm falling, And You've told me who I am. I am Yours. I am Yours. Who am I? That the eyes that see my sin Would look on me with love And watch me rise again. Who am I? That the voice that calmed the sea, Would call out through the rain, And calm the storm in me. Not because of who I am, But because of what You've done. Not because of what I've done, But because of who You are. still crazy for gossip girl. seriously, i shld buy the vcds and free myself to load it. i think my lappy is kinda old. it's crashing! days without school are like totally awesome. but thinking of monday, it will be a nightmare. how i wish i can add some spice to boring school life. not mundane, but boring! life isnt any better. went far east to cut my hair, i realised its time for some retail therapy before im going mad! yea, gotta enjoy now before its too late. the first thing i wanna do after i graduate, i wanna highlight my hair. =D be who you are to be. open up your eyes and see. dont take things for granted. lets move on. when tweety is locked up
loading Gossip Girl. Huiyu and Shimin best reccomendation. block tests are finally over. back to my tv world. i gotta praise myself for geog since i only studied one day before. well, though isnt much effective. furthermore, the ones i studied didnt come out. =/ the loading is super slow! my mom finished off the tao huay she bought for me. -.- life after block tests are gonna be torturous. not as if it isnt now. school life can be more exciting man. come on come on. the centre of the world is never one thing. and narcissism isnt a virtue.. one funny thing during exam is that halfway through, my stomach will roll the drums and its so difficult to concentrate!!!! yes. off to finding food. unheard voices that were familiar
what is the difference between living and dead if there is no spirit and soul?the weather is driving me crazy. looking at my beautiful planner now which has flower patterns. i can show you next time. =) just got home. decide to check my mails and type a little here. Elizabeth was saying yesterday they had to do a GP research on 2008 significant events. i realised there were so many. from the US elections, to Singpore Grand Prix, to Beijing Olympics, to our flyer, to our recession and many good and bads. i didnt know 2008 was so events-full. life in 2009 is really nothing much compared to 08'. yet, it is like you need to double your capacity in order to pull through this mundane year. i was reading the newsletter today and my GP teacher wrote Ecc. :1-8. A time for everything. there is a time for a thing. lets slow down a little, take a step back and see. maybe there is something you neglected, you have not notice. when your one of your hand only caught hold the edge of the cliff, i wonder how long can the person hang on to. when will the time for help to come. now, tomorrow or never. when you feel the current is going against you, will you turn around to follow the current flow or continue fighting the flow, to reach where you wanna be. you know it isnt that easy. and both are not wrong, are they? my GP teacher shared with us a funny prayer: Lord, I pray for patience, teach me NOW. a decision in a moment will determine your forever. a change can occur, but the history will not change. every action you create history-significant or not at all. but it affect someone,anyone or even everyone. I JUST SERIOUSLY FEEL LIKE DYING. down down down
bounce bounce bounce off the building...one week crash whole j1&to date j2 syllabus for block test. im not even 1/4 there. okay, nowhere near. it is kinda dumb when my school pushes block test so much earlier compared to other colleges. i see no meaning. arrrrrrrr. finished math supplement online. taking a break here man. i lost my fav beautiful clip. and i seriously dont feel like searching for it. wait till you see the mess in my room. you will understand. HAHA. maybe it will just pop out itself one fine day. the problem is i dont even rmb where i last touch it. weeks and days haven been good man. my eyes are swollen inside and i cant wear contacts and therefore need to clip my hair. there is a link, trust me. stm is kinda common now. i will walk into the room to take my socks and once i step inside, i forgot what i wanted to take. just like Denise today. who wanted to tell me what thing unite in the world. -.- i said dabaos. i seriously just feel like.... strangling someone. time is running. bye! as i hear, as i see
HEARFEST is a blast man! reached church super early but already see so many people there from Zone F. wow!busy day, tiring day but awesome day. good and bad things. but Pst Joakim is the best man. i gotta thank him so much for today. =D i like talking to Xinyi. she is really mature for a 13 years old. she rocks! i must seriously tell you. the gladiator game seem so fun! im thinking if i play, very fast will game over. hmm. i shld try next time. Ivan said they will bring in again. maybe Skinny Club should play together. =D talking to Peijun on msn now. about 50 first dates. i watched it at someone's house i think. they watched during HF. Peijun is into fantasy again. the show is not bad, kinda sweet but it is so not real. who will have such wierd sickness man. but good story. =D time to hit the bed. ohhhh! before i left church, i was at the office. i saw Weitze and Arvan asking Charleston to explain something in the Bible to them. sooo cute! so inspiring. soo cute! okay, i want to keep full attention for Modern Day Martyrs. lalabye! eve of V day
Pst Joakim!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! seriously like 1000 years never see him. everytime he comes, i really wanna go Sweden and take a look!just the starting of the martyrs are already so powerful, what is more for sunday man. i cant wait for it. hug sqaures! Get Ed today was not too bad. i like about the insight of journalism. it did inspire me to be a journalist for a while. HAHAHA. wht if you be the frontline ones, those that goes to war-torn countries and might get killed anytime. speaking of that, Camy showed us a super gory video where a man got beheaded by some terrorist. just for about 18sec i think. i will have nightmare man. i watched it twice somemore! hahaha. to get a clearer look of it. yucks. balloons is in the air! shouting at the top of my lungs!!!!! |
