Cooper's Hypnobabies Birth Story

Cooper's guess date was Friday, September 29, 2017. I had planned on flying my good friend, doula, and photographer in for the birth. She was arriving on Wednesday, September 27th. I kept telling the baby he was not allowed to come until she was here! And he listened! We were able to take amazing maternity pictures before he came--which I will always treasure.

On Thursday morning the 28th at around 3:00am, I woke up with some pressure waves. I was so excited that my birthing time might be starting. I couldn't go back to sleep. I listened to Deepening, and Fear Clearing, and Birthing Day Affirmations. The waves slowly fizzled out and I fell back to sleep.

Friday morning, at around 3:00am the same thing happened. Except this time, the waves felt different and I had bloody show! I listened to Birthing Day Affirmations and started timing the waves. They were pretty consistent but around 7:00am, they slowed down. But I still felt like it was my birthing day so I told Cory to stay home from work. That morning we all went for a walk to try to get the waves consistent again, but it didn't work. Throughout the day, I had easy waves and I just did my best to go about my day.

Around 3:00pm, I decided that laying down with the peanut ball sounded really comfortable. As I laid there, my dog laid with me. He knew something was up. My waves suddenly became consistent again.

I noticed Cooper was in a weird position. I was pretty sure he was posterior too because I could feel an arm by my pubic bone. Around 4:00pm, Marci had me do some inversions.

At this point, Cory took the boys to run an errand and get dinner. Marci and I went over the Hypnobabies Quick Reference Guide since we hadn't done that yet. I also did some side stepping on the stairs. 5:00pm rolled around and I decided that if my waves stayed consistent, I would let my midwife, Jenny, know that it was time to head over. She lives on the opposite side of Phoenix, so it would take her an hour and a half in rush hour traffic to get to me. Throughout the hour, my waves were about 5 minutes apart lasting 1 minute long. So at 6:00pm, we told her to make her way over! Cory took the boys to a friends house after they had eaten dinner.

We started preparing my bedroom. Marci taped plastic on the carpet and we put the plastic sheet on the bed. She and Cory started filling the tub half way as well. I turned on the BYU football game and watched that in between waves. I sat on my ball through some easy waves and used the finger-drop technique. I still was having bloody show--so that was a good sign.

Jenny arrived around 7:30pm. I asked her to check me once she was settled in and I used the bathroom. I was 100% effaced and 4cm. I was shocked! I thought I was much further along because of how my waves felt. BUT the baby was at 0 station, so he was SUPER low. Jenny said my cervix was posterior so his head was not on it properly. She and Marci knew exactly what to do to get the baby and my cervix lined up. I did some waves sitting on the peanut ball leaning against Cory--which was actually super comfortable.

Around 8:00pm we needed to make sure the boys got home and in to bed because they were up at 5:00am! We told the midwives and Marci to hide in our room while Cory snuck them upstairs and gave them a quick bath. While he was doing that, I did some more inversions and Jenny and Marci did some sifting on me with a sheet--which was about at 8:30pm. After a few minutes of that Jenny said, "Ok, that's probably good!" Somewhere around this time, we turned on Easy First Stage--since the football game was over. I had a couple of waves leaning over my bed and then they suggested I get in bed to rest a little bit. (8:45pm)

As I laid in bed with the peanut ball between my legs, I started vocalizing a bit. I think Jenny and Marci knew what was up because at around 9:15, Jenny asked if I wanted to get in the pool. I was hesitant because in my mind, I still had a long way to go. But she told me I could always get out if I wanted to. Staying in Center, I moved to the pool.

I really needed my husband. He was a great support by putting his hand on my shoulder for the Relax cue. Things really intensified around this time. I remember having 3 waves right on top of each other. One wave would peak and not subside all the way. Then the next one would peak, and not subside--3 times! Marci asked if they were going down all the way, I just shook my head no. It was comforting how observant she was.

The next wave, my body pushed. I was surprised because I honestly thought it wasn't time for that yet. I thought it was a fluke. So I waited until the next wave to see what would happen. Aaaand my body REALLY pushed this time. So I let everyone know I was pushing and asked for the Pushing track to be put on. I reached down and felt the bag of waters bulging! I told everyone mostly because I was shocked he was coming so soon. I breathed down the Peace cue to myself over and over again--almost like a chant. Marci was telling me, "Peace, peace," over and over again too. I imagined his head as an orange hypno-anesthesia ball coming down--kind of what the track says. I felt down and could feel his head crowning--still in the sac! I joked with friends that it was my life goal to have a baby en caul--as if I have control over that. Whenever I imagined birthing my baby, he was always in his bag of waters. So I think my mind played a big part in that.  I felt so much pressure that I kind of yelled out that I didn't want to tear! Jenny told me to go slow, but I honestly couldn't. My body was doing all of the pushing. It was amazing to feel how strong my uterus was.

Once his head was out, the midwives and Marci were excitedly telling me he was still in his sac!  I told Marci to take lots of pictures. But I don't feel comfortable posting pictures of my butt on the internet. So if any of my friends or birth junkies want to see those pictures, just message me! It's pretty cool!

With the next wave, his body came out and Jenny broke my water just as fast! He was getting ready to take his first breath and my placenta was not ready to come out. So with him coming out with the sac, it was pulling on my placenta that was still attached to me. I'm so glad Jenny knew exactly what to do and acted so fast.

He was born around 9:45pm--so from the time Jenny checked me to him being born was only 2 hours! Things went super fast once he was lined up on top of my cervix! Right after he came out, I had a huge gush of blood--because of him pulling on the placenta. The water turned red! I honestly didn't notice. I was so into my new baby I just birthed!

We didn't stay in the pool long. Jenny had us get right out and onto the bed.

I loved being at home where there was no panic or hysteria. I was surrounded by 3 loving midwives, a doula, and my husband. It was so peaceful. It was bliss! I was thrilled I got to experience my first water birth! I think the warm water really helped while I was pushing because I didn't tear! Baby Cooper was bigger than my other boys by over a pound! He's a very special boy and I'm so glad he's here! I love giving birth. It really is such a high. Another successful Hypnobabies birth for the books!

Miscarriage Birth Story

We were expecting baby #3 in March. My due date was March 11, 2017. We were all so excited. It took 7 months to get pregnant this time. The boys could not wait. We had it all planned out. 

I'll try to start at the beginning. I went to my check up September 1st at almost 13 weeks and heard a good strong fast heartbeat. I was still so shocked I was finally pregnant. I had even felt the baby move a handful of times. I remember telling the midwife that at the appointment.  Cory and I thought about announcing on social media that we were expecting #3. I told him I'd wait for the weekend. A week and a half later on the 11th, I flew to Utah for a few days to be with Maddison and meet baby Leif. We had a great few days. I also didn't feel like I wanted to announce anything on social media. So I didn't and thought I would maybe after 20 weeks. As Maddison drove me to the airport to go home, I remember having a very worrisome feeling. I hadn't felt the baby move in awhile. I remember on that ride I kept thinking to myself, "Come on baby. Move for me." I thought I felt something so I dropped it after that--not wanting to overthink anything. 

I had talked it over with the midwife that I could have my anatomy scan a little bit early. It was scheduled for October 6th. I was going to be 17 weeks and 5 days. For some reason, as the 6th approached, I began feeling really uneasy about the appointment. I was feeling like I shouldn't have scheduled it so early. I needed to push it back a week so the baby would be a bit bigger and things would be seen easier. I prayed about it telling Heavenly Father that if I really needed to move the appointment, then let me keep the uneasy feeling. That feeling never went away. So I moved it to the 13th and felt so much better. 

I could not wait for the anatomy scan. I honestly felt I was having a girl. Cory and the boys always talked about having another boy. But I just kept thinking he was going to be surprised because I thought for sure it was a girl. 

Soon after I moved the appointment, I started feeling more and more worried. I noticed my uterus wasn't growing. I wasn't feeling the baby move. I knew in the back of my mind that the baby was gone. Every day I would palpate my stomach and find my uterus and push on what felt like the baby to get it to move--nothing. But I was holding on to whatever piece of hope I could. I looked at pictures of me when I was pregnant with Cade. I didn't start showing until 19 or 20 weeks and I didn't feel him move until around 18 weeks. I kept holding on to that. 

All of my close friends kept asking when my ultrasound was. Everyone couldn't wait to find out what I was having. I told my friends and family when it was and also told them my concerns. I felt like I had to prepare them for what the outcome could be. 

On Sunday, October 9th, I couldn't hold it in anymore. I took a shower and just broke down. I cried and cried all morning--alone so no one would know. Later that morning we were all sitting in bed together. Cory started talking about the baby and asking the boys if they wanted a boy or a girl. That's when I lost it again. Cory asked what was wrong. I tried my best to explain without saying too much because the boys were there. Carson picked it up though. His face fell. He dropped onto Cory and cried with me. 

That week I did whatever I could to keep my mind off of my upcoming appointment. Carson didn't have preschool. I had a few friends contact me asking for play dates. It was play date after play date. I thought how I had never had a week like that before--surrounded by friends. I also had quite a few miscarriage stories pop up on my Facebook newsfeed. I felt inspired to read them. And I also knew why. I cleaned my whole house that week. My sub conscience mind knew what was coming while my rational mind kept pushing it out. The night before the appointment, I was reading in The Gift of Giving Life. I was looking for something specific. But instead, every page I turned to was about miscarriage. I got a little mad and slammed the book down and went to sleep.

The next day was hard. I ended up spending the morning helping a friend to keep my mind off of things. When the time came, we dropped the boys off with a friend and drove to the office. I was so nervous but didn't say anything to Cory. 

We walked in the office and the ultrasound tech took us back before we even sat down. We got started right away. He asked how far along I was. With a knot in my stomach I said, "18 weeks and 5 days". He showed us with his hand how big the baby was and began the scan. The second we saw the baby, I knew it was gone. But I waited for him to say it. The first thing he said was, "The first thing I notice is the baby is small." As we stared at the screen he kept rubbing my belly with the wand and said, "This is where the heartbeat usually is." That was it. That was my cue. I could finally let go of all the hope I was grasping. My rational mind finally came around. I sobbed and sobbed. Cory seemed to be a little in shock. The tech told me he was sorry and went to tell the midwife. He came back a few minutes later to take some measurements of the baby. Then he gave us tissue and took us to a back room where the midwife would give us our options.

We met with Amanda that day. She came in and held my hand while I cried. Once I calmed down a bit, she told me this wasn't my fault and all those things we needed to hear. Then she gave us our options and asked what we wanted to do. Thanks to all the miscarriage stories, I already knew what I wanted to do. My mind had already gone over the options. She wanted us to go to the hospital that night or the next morning. But I pushed it back to Saturday so I could get my mom down to watch the boys. Amanda then informed me that Saturday was national pregnancy and infant loss day. I cried and cried more and just thought how odd that was. She told us the baby measured 13 weeks and 6 days. So I'm guessing it passed sometime before I left for Utah. Amanda told us Dr. Newman was going to be on call over the weekend and that no midwife would be there. But she assured me he was great. And I had heard wonderful things about him, so with that--we left after a big hug from Amanda.

We sat in the car and cried for awhile. I called my mom and texted some friends that were anxiously waiting to find out what we were having. After an hour we got the courage to go get the boys. Our friend Emily who was watching the boys asked how it went. But I just cried and shook my head. Cory cried with me as we told her the details. Once we were ready to go, she went to get the boys from upstairs. We hadn't said anything to the boys yet. But Carson persistently kept asking if the baby was out of my tummy now. I was so confused why he was asking me that. I wasn't ready to even answer that. But I had to because he wouldn't stop asking. So Cory and I told them the baby went back to Heavenly Father and that we would still have another baby, just not right now.

We spent the night telling our friends and family. I was so thankful I hadn't said anything on social media. Emily was so kind and dropped off ice cream and cookies. I don't think I stopped crying that entire evening. I was also mad--mad that I had moved the ultrasound to a week later. Why did I feel like I needed to do that? Why couldn't I have just gotten this over a week before? It didn't make sense.

The next day Friday was a blur. The boys were supposed to play with a friend but Carson wasn't feeling too good. I think we just watched tv and cleaned a few things to get ready for Grandma Alice to come that night.

I kept wondering why this happened. Why did this happen to me? Throughout the day I had little inspirations come but didn't think much of it. I also wondered why my body hadn't let go naturally. Something odd did happen though--I usually am very hot at night. I live in Phoenix and don't sleep with too many blankets on. But for the past week, I was really cold at night. I HAD to sleep with all the blankets on me. And I also think I was starting to lose my mucus plug.

I had talked to Marci on and off since finding out. I remembered her saying something about knowing a bereavement doula. (A doula that helps with miscarriages and stillborns.) I decided to look them up to see if there was one here in Phoenix. There was actually one pretty close by that I decided to contact. She got back to me and was very helpful and comforting and said she would help me with whatever. I called Marci to see if she couldn't ask her bereavement doula friend some questions for me. To my surprise and a tender mercy from the Lord, Marci was on her way to see her at a doula meeting they were holding. Once they were done and she had called me back, she told me lots of helpful information. The most important being that my milk would come in. I was stunned. What? My milk was going to come in? That added a whole other level of emotions. She also told me to look at stillbirthday.com to get a sense of what my baby would look like at 14 weeks. My bereavement doula told me the same thing. But I was not prepared for that. I absolutely did not want to do that. I wasn't even sure I wanted to see my baby. I was scared. I went to bed that night feeling dread and fear. I didn't sleep much.

I woke up early that next morning. To my amazement, I felt completely different than I had the night before. I had an immense peaceful feeling with me. I felt confident at looking at pictures of what my baby might look like. So I did. I thought I would feel more sad and sick looking at it. But I was surprised when an overwhelming joyful feeling overcame me. I was happy to see that little baby on the screen of my phone that was gone. That baby had a purpose. That baby was extremely loved by our Father in Heaven. And so was my baby.

I got up and ready to go to the hospital. Cory gave me a blessing before we left. In his blessing, he told me why this happened. It was word for word what I had felt in the days before. It was an extremely comforting blessing. I could feel the power of the priesthood and Heavenly Father's love for me and for Cory. Afterwards, while holding back tears, I said goodbye to my boys and to my mom.

We arrived at the hospital at 8:30 am.  It took forever getting checked in and for a nurse to come see us. I was very calm and collected. But I was freezing! I could not get warm. I had to turn the heater on in my room--in Phoenix when it was 95 degrees outside! The nurse kept bringing me warm blankets. It was so odd. I think it was my body finally realizing. We didn't get the cytotec started until 11:30. (My cytotec was administered vaginally every 4 hours. It was pill that was supposed to dissolve right next to the cervix. But when you're body is not supposed to deliver, your cervix is very high. So it was very uncomfortable having the nurse try to stick her entire arm up my vagina.) After the first dose, I started feeling a few contractions. But it fizzled out to just cramping. Cory and I were so bored. We watched TV for a little while but it was odd to just sit and do nothing but wait.

At 3:30 I was given another dose. I started having major contractions that I really had to focus and use my hypnobabies for. The contractions were right on top of each other. Hypnobabies is seriously so amazing. I really didn't see my contractions as pain. I was totally fine and didn't think I wanted pain medication. I made a sarcastic comment to Cory that the baby would probably come and nobody would be here. It was funny because I needed to be up. I leaned against the top of the bed just the way I gave birth to Cade. Then I felt like I had to walk around. So I did that. After an hour, contractions slowed down.

The hospital was having a ceremony in a garden outside for national infant and pregnancy loss day. My doctor was speaking at it and one of the midwives was singing at it. So I wanted to go. It started at 5:30 and my nurses let me go since I was fine. My nurse Felicia wheeled me down--wrapped up in a blanket. I was cold even outside! The ceremony was very nice. Although it was eerie sitting there having contractions about to give up my pregnancy and baby. My doctor was first to speak. I don't remember much of what he said. During his talk, I heard a voice tell me, "This is why. This is why you had to wait." This was why I felt prompted to move my ultrasound. I needed to be at this ceremony and feel these feelings and understand what these other parents felt. One of the reasons I was told I miscarried is so I can help other people. I had this incredible feeling with me the rest of the ceremony. And those poor people! They were crying because they lost their baby. Different moms spoke about the hurt and confusion they still had. They had little comfort in knowing God's plan--or even the plan of salvation. And there I was, crying because I felt so loved by God! I had never felt so loved or peaceful in my entire life! And here these people were angry with God because their baby was taken from them. I felt so sad for them. I wanted to just tell them all how much God loved them.

Our candles from the ceremony. They also released butterflies.

Around 6:30, we went back up to our room. I was getting tired of the contractions and told my nurse I was ready for some pain medication. She said she would put the order in and be back in when my doctor "okayed" it. So I sat on the bed, still in my sweats from being outside, and waited. I had a plan. As soon as she came back, I was going to take the medication and get in the bath. A warm bath sounded so good! I called my mom while I waited and got an update how the boys were. Cory and I also talked about the ceremony and the feelings we had. And I waited some more.

The next thing I knew, I felt a gush--followed by intense contractions! I thought it might have been my water breaking so I called out to Cory and tried to take my pants off to keep them from getting dirty. But I couldn't move. The pressure was so strong. It was comparative to transition in normal labor. I told Cory to take my pants off and call the nurse! The nurse came in and said it was just blood and to wait and see what happens. I asked if she was going to check me or anything but she said no. She was very sweet. But I'm not sure she had much experience with this sort of thing. I knew it was time. The doctor still hadn't gotten the order so I laid there focusing on relaxing. I remember kind of yelling at Cory telling him it was a good thing I knew how to do this! It was tough. I told Cory to call Marci so she could talk me through it over speaker phone! But he must have thought that was crazy because he was like, " Uhhhh." Right then, the nurse came in with the new nurse--it was shift change. This new nurse Kim looked right at me and told me she had delivered lots of miscarriages and stillborns and knew what she was doing. She immediately gloved up and checked me. She said my cervix was very soft (duh.)

I had a few more contractions and I jokingly told Cory this would be my first baby I delivered on my back! Kim checked me again and said the bag of water was right there. I could feel it. She asked me to bear down. I tried--but I felt so paralyzed. I don't think I did much. I think she helped it out because the next thing I knew, it was out! It came around 7:45. It happened very fast. It all came out together--the baby in the sack and the placenta. It was fascinating! Cory didn't want to see the baby so he was off to the side. But I asked him to pass me my phone so I could take pictures. How often do you see something like that? He sat right back down.

The nurse started breaking open the sack of water. We had to move the legs to see that it was a boy! I was shocked! I yelled out, "It's a boy!" That's when Cory got up and came to see his sweet boy. He was crying so hard. He wanted another boy so bad. It killed me seeing him like that. After Kim cut the cord, I just held him and stared. He was perfect. You could see every rib bone and his spine, his tiny feet and 10 fingers and toes. He was as long as my hand.

After awhile, the nurse took him to a different room to take some pictures of him. Cory and I just sat and cried. But we also talked about how we could feel other people there with us that we could not see with our eyes. I think many people were in that room with us, comforting us. There was such a peaceful feeling. It was like being in the temple. We talked about naming him. But it didn't feel right. We couldn't even think of a name. We just couldn't. I often wonder why I felt he was a girl. I think there was a little girl with me after he passed, comforting me. I talked to my sister Eden recently and she also had a little girl spirit comfort her while she was in the hospital. I don't know if it is the same spirit or a different one but I thought that was cool.

The nurse took great pictures. I even asked her if she could take a couple more of just his feet. She was so great. She told me she couldn't get footprints but came back later to tell me she got them! She worked hard for me. I held him some more after everything was done. It was hard to hold him because since he had been gone for so long, he smelled like death. Every time I moved him, a little of his skin would slough off. But I still stared and stared. He was a baby--even at 14 weeks. Cory and I talked about how people could abort these innocent beings! It is so awful and sickening when you see your own child at that size. I don't understand it. Never will. It's devilish.

The hospital gave us all kinds of options as to what to do with his body. We felt good about letting the hospital take him and eventually end up in an angel grave somewhere in Phoenix. I don't even remember the address. For us, that was right and okay.

I tried to rest that night. But got woken up by my doctor at midnight. He finally showed up. I did get pain medication. But not until after the baby came while I got pitocin to help my uterus contract. I guess my doctor has a hard time with loss. He doesn't know what to say or do. I was disappointed no midwives were on call that weekend. It would have been nice to have more female support. The hospital put together a memory box for us with all kinds of stuff--his blanket he was in, all the props used in the pictures and forget me not flower seeds. Even a necklace with little feet on it. It was really nice. We finally got discharged the next morning around noon.

As sad and tragic as this was, I am in awe at how comforted I felt. I hardly cried the whole day. It felt like an out of body experience. I know it was the prayers, my blessing, angels, and the Holy Ghost. I now understand deeper the gift that the Holy Ghost is. He can be a real tangible comfort--along with priesthood power. I am so grateful for the gospel of Jesus Christ. I feel so lucky to be a member of His church. I know it is true. I feel so honored that Heavenly Father trusted me enough to grow this sweet child--even for a short time. It was His child though. It was His tool. He was my baby but ultimately, it was the Lord's. And that is comforting. 

lds.org

October 2015 Update

Caden:

He has started talking a lot more. He calls Carson "Wah-wah" because he can't say his name. We think it's the cutest thing. He loves his Dada. He only wants Dad to put him down for naps or down for bed. He has started screaming, which we hate. But he only does it when Carson takes toys from him.

Carson: 

He loves being outside. He always wants to be digging in the dirt. Lately he has been having these horrible meltdowns in the morning. Hopefully he grows out of that soon. He is learning so much though. 

For example, this morning (Sunday) we went for a walk. We went by the new playground being built and Carson saw some workers there. He said how they shouldn't be working and how that was too bad because it was Sunday. He said Monday is a good day to work. Then we past a jogger. She politely said hi to us...

Carson: "Hi!!! Are you running?

J: "Yes. I'm trying to run anyway."

C: "We don't run on Sundays!"

Horribly embarrassed, I didn't look back and hoped she didn't hear him yell that at her. But Cory and I were also laughing really hard. Then we pass a different playground. He sees some kids playing. He of course yells to them, "We don't play on Sunday! We don't play on Sunday!"

I had to try and explain to him that not everybody knows that. He says the funniest stuff sometimes. I need to do a better job of recording it. 

 I made this gorgeous wreath with garlands that were 70% off at Michael's. I scored! And I'm so proud of it.

We visited the Smith's and Aunt Amber helped them make Pumpkin bread.

We got to go the the speedway and see the cars test before the race. So cool! They boys loved it for about 1 second. It was so loud, they just wanted to go home. Carson thought it was cool in the parking lot. But once we got in, he was way too overwhelmed. Poor thing.

He loves pretending he is sleeping. He thinks it is so funny. His smirk kills me. He's my little joke-ster.

Welp, that's all for now.

Halloween 2015

For the past couple of months, every time I ask Carson what he wants to be for Halloween, he would tell me a garbage truck. So I've been Pinterest-ing like crazy to figure out how in the heck to make him a garbage truck costume. It took me awhile but I did it! And he loved it.

We decided to all be apart of this idea. Caden was a recycling bin and Cory and I were the crew. Believe it or not, Caden actually chose to wear that over a monkey costume for trick-or-treating. He actually liked it!

And because I failed to blog about this last year, here are our 2014 costumes!

Mickey, Minne, Pluto, and Donald Duck.

Carson requested to be Donald Duck...

Firetruck Museum, etc.

Last Saturday we went to the Hall of Flame Firetruck Museum in Tempe. We were a little worried it might not be that fun for the kids, but they loved it!

Look what Cory spotted! Provo.

 They had an area full of kid stuff so they could play.

After the museum, we headed home and had a visit with Cathy, Amber & Warren, Carissa, and Tarah. It was so good to see them!

Caden had his first day of nursery a few weeks ago. He did really great the first couple of weeks. But now, he's not. He screams if either I or Cory are not in there. He's been SUPER attached lately. He's also been waking up in the middle of the night as mad as can be. He's been waking up super early. Like before 6 and I can't get him back to sleep. So his life hasn't been too wonderful. He's gradually starting to learn more words. He said purple this week for the first time. He still won't say too many other colors though. He loves to do everything that Carson does. He won't sit in his high chair any more. He LOVES trucks. Especially firetrucks. He's happy in the car. So we've been doing lots of unnecessary trips to Target. He tripped and fell on the tile this past week and cut the inside of his lip for the first time. Blood was everywhere! Poor thing. He's still teething.

On Monday we had a surprise visit from Troy. That was really fun to catch up with him.

Carson is getting better at doing puzzles. I also printed off a behavior chart which has been so great! I put a clothespin either on Amazing, Great Job, Warning, or Consequence. He loves it when he gets to the top blue. He says, "Yay, I'm Amazing!" That is really cute. I also got him a pom pom jar to use when he does extra nice things. Life has gotten a lot better. I'm going to start doing a Preschool with him this week which I'm really excited about. 

I have been bored lately and decided to organize the pantry. I'll have to take some pictures when it's complete. A couple weeks ago, I made a magazine holder. I found some cute wrapping paper at Target on clearance and Mod Podged it. 

   

As much as I hate that Carson and Caden fight almost constantly, they actually do get along sometimes. I try to capture those moments because they do not last too long.

Selfie Sunday