Shakespear's Unveiled

So, in an effort to save a few trees, I have referred all of you here to learn about our past year. It has been a fun and rather uneventful year as compared to years past. I think the one thing that has affected our family the most is our Ward split. Without moving anywhere, our whole lives have changed and we're getting to know more people in the neighborhood.



Christopher is still practicing Dentistry. He is surviving this economy and still trying to improve his office. He is still involved in the Scouting program. He is Scout Master over the 11-year old scout program at Church. He LOVES it. He was born to Scout. He is mastering the ability to multi-task but, alas, it is with video games and computer surfing instead of laundry and washing dishes. He enjoys playing with the kiddos and our 55 lb Basset Hound that thinks she's a lap dog. He was able to take the boys to Star Wars in Concert and shed a small tear of joy. He still LOVES everything Star Wars and Science Fiction.

Christi is still working for Chris from home. She volunteers at the school once a week and serves in the Primary Presidency as the 2nd Counselor; hence, she is learning to love scouts. She continues to learn new things and tried her hand at crochet this year. Although you would never guess she has time to read, she still reads about a novel a week. Her big adventure this year was getting stung by a jelly fish in Mazatlan that turned her whole arm numb and took several hours and loads of Benadryl to return to normal.

Zacory is excelling in school. He really enjoys 4th grade. He misses his old teacher (and so does Mom) but is learning to have patience with his classmates. He has achieved his Bear in Scouts and takes after his Dad for this particular aptitude. He takes after his Mom in that he is reading all the time. He has found some good authors to follow. His new hobby is playing flag football with the neighborhood boys. We have hopes that he'll get rough & tough here soon and begin competing with his peers in sporting games. He also has started watching after his Brother and Sister for short spurts of time and little amounts of money. He's our little entrepreneur when it comes to doing extra chores around the house for even more money. He wants a College Fund for Christmas.

Tyler is also doing well in school. His teacher this year in very observant and involved, which is what this kid needs. He is getting better at reading and will probably be fighting over books with his brother soon enough. He is a very social being and loves to get involved with friends around the 'hood. But he is also completely content to play in his room with his Legos by himself. He is loving the world of Wii and in constantly issuing challenges to Mom and Dad. He is very kind and such a peacemaker in our home. He is always ready with a smile and hug! It makes us happy to see him progressing and improving in nearly everything. He has such the talent for construction and math; therefore, his whole Christmas Wish List is Lego related.

Samantha keeps us hopping around here. She goes to Pre-School 3 times a week which allows Mom some time to herself. She is quite popular at school.....especially with the boys. They are constantly vying for her attention at playtime for she's the rough & tough one that instigates most of the trouble. Although, she still loves to come home and gather up her dolls on the staircase and "read" a book to them. Her hobby of late is Checkers. That girl gets it and really makes the rest of us work to get a win. She has quite the aptitude for reading as well. She has several story books memorized and is spelling short words. She went to Disney Princesses on Ice and sat mesmerized the whole time. Hence, her Christmas Wish is to BE a princess. I hope she's happy with a doll or two or six.

We wish you all a very Merry Christmas and hope your hearts are touched with the magic of this wonderful season. We consider ourselves very blessed and extremely loved. Please keep in touch with us and may you all have a great 2010!

Mars Vs. Venus

When Chris and I were first married, we took a marriage class at BYU. I remember having a discussion about chores and splitting up the chores to maintaining a house. I recall the professor talking about distinct responsibilities that seem to be inherently male and female; taking out the trash, washing dishes, doing laundry, etc. You get the idea.

Well, now I've grown up and we have some interesting division of labor around here. I've tried to maintain the mantra: If I can physically do it, I will. This has led to my adventures in mowing the lawn, weeding, hanging up wall decor with a drill too big for my hand, climbing ladders and scooping up dog poop.

Now when it comes to snow removal our views are quite different. You see, I married a country boy that grew up in the sticks. The problem with sticks is that they don't shovel very well, not like smooth concrete. So the "Mars" perspective is to only clear the snow when it is hindering the evacuation of a vehicle....which usually translates into a foot or more. The other "Mars" view seems to be to pack the snow down and make it slick and near impossible to remove from the driveway not to mention ascend our inclined driveway to park the vehicle in the garage.

IF the drive gets shoveled, it is this "Venus" who does it most of the time. It's a little embarrassing to be the one out there with all the other men shoveling out their wives. I prefer to get out there before dawn so my wonderful MARS doesn't have a chance to pack it down with his 2 ton vehicle (OK, so it's not that big). I like a clean drive-way. I like to have my walkway free of ice and snow so solicitors won't sue me for slipping around the corner to sell me something I didn't want in the first place or have my neighbors bring me warm treats.

So here's this "Venus" Christmas wish: Shovel the drive and walkway. Just because I am physically capable of doing it doesn't mean I'm the only one who can do it. Tap into your chivalrous soul and just make your "Venus" happy with a nice clean driveway.

Not Dead Yet....

I've been neglecting my blog lately. There have been many many changes occurring in our household lately and I've just been plain busy busy busy.

I promise I haven't forgotten about you. I will be back shortly after I narrow down what to blog about.

Real Housewives of Utah Valley

My friends and I were discussing these "Real Housewives" shows on cable recently and I thought our neighborhood would be a great reality show. Here's what you would see:

"Sheila" up to her elbows in dishes after "putting up" 16 quarts of peaches, 12 pints of applesauce, and 8 pints of homemade pickles not to mention the 16 pounds of cheese she dipped in wax for her food storage (yes, all of it done in one day).

"Daphne" running her tween to school at 8 am, her 5 year old to kindergarten at 9 am and the toddler to preschool by 9:15am with a baby in the car seat only to turn around and pick up the toddler by 11, the 5 yr. old by noon and the "early bird" at 2:15 with a baby still in the car seat.

"Tisha" with the newspaper coupons spread all over her table and the laptop on her knee frantic to find the laundry detergent she needs for the 8 loads of laundry waiting their turn in the washer for under $4 because that's all she has in her wallet until hubby get's paid next week.

"Melody" with the phone strapped to her ear as she tries to find Primary subs for all the classes who are missing teachers. She starts with "A" and works her way down the list. She wonders if caller ID would account for no one picking up their phones.

"Justine" filling all of her "Etsy" shop orders today so she can have a clean house tomorrow for potential buyers. Their house has been on the market for 7 months and still no offers. She wonders what they are going to do when hubby starts his new job in 2 weeks in another state entirely.

"Christi" typing away on her computer hoping to put a smile on someone's face for the day because she really loves these women. They are her friends, her mentors and her therapists. They inspire her to do better and be better on a daily basis. She realizes that they do all these things in the name of love; love for their family, love for others and especially love for their Heavenly Father.

I just want you all to know that I appreciate all you do in a day to keep your families healthy and happy. Keep up the good work and know that we are all doing the best that we can and that really should be enough.

Savings

So a few weeks ago I talked about how challenged I was at "couponing". I'm happy to report that our delivery person has gotten our driveway with regularity since.

I went on my first shopping trips and was quite surprised at the results.



This was a savings of 46% off my total grocery bill. Not bad. I almost saved as much as I spent.

I was even more impressed with my next trip:



Although it's only 45% off my total grocery bill, I realized that I purchased 85 items for about $82.00. That's better than shopping at the dollar store.

The good news is that we have our groceries for the next 2 weeks including snacks and lunches for the boys. I look forward to learning more and working the system for even better savings. Here's to learning new things!

Blessedly Screwed

So, I'm a "glass is half empty" kind of gal. My first instinct is to go directly to the negative, have my fit, then begin to think about the positives and the better half. I would love to be the "glass is half full" kind of gal right off the bat, and I'm practicing, but old habits die hard.

As I was contemplating just how screwed up my life is right about now, I had a paradigm shift. I actually stopped mid thought and told myself to count my blessings. Here are just a few:

1. My home: Although we lose shingles off our roof during every windstorm, we haven't gotten wet yet. I LOVE my neighbors. I love that one neighbor will set out a chair for me every time she's outside with her children so we can visit. I love all the kids that want to gather in my garage to make up the next game. I love it's openness and all the sunshine that comes in through the windows, especially in wintertime. I love that I live at the end of a long cove; that cars aren't whizzing by making me nervous with the kiddos outside playing. I love that we have so much open space behind the house. It's a great place to gather and play games.
2. My/Our Livelihood: I love that I can work from home on my own terms. I love that Chris allows me the space to go this. I love that I can be in this venture of Small Business Owner with my sweet husband. I love all the things we have learned about one another and about being SBOs. There has been A LOT of room for growth and although we may still struggle, I'm grateful to be part of a business that serves the good of humanity; a business that is there to improve their quality of life.
3. My Friends; old and new: I have the best friends one could hope for. While attending a Book Group discussion, I realized the the definition of "friend" changes with marriage. The things that you couldn't wait to tell your best "girl" friend are now things that you can't wait to tell your husband (speaking from a woman's perspective obviously). Chris is my best friend, but I've been blessed with many women around me to support me, inspire me and rejoice with me. I think it's important to have different kinds of friends to help you grow and become better. There is one person, in particular, that doesn't consider me her friend, but she's mine just the same. She has taught me many important lessons, ones that I've been ready for and some not so ready. I have taken everything she's said to heart and I'm grateful to her for her wisdom. She doesn't invite me to her home to socialize and doesn't call me on the phone, but I still feel a connection to her and consider her a friend. I'm also grateful for the opportunity to make some new friends in our new ward. I have the best of both worlds. I'm grateful for my friends that accept me for who I am and what I'm able to give at this point in my life and have that be enough for them.
4. My Testimony: Contrary to what others may believe, I do have one. I have a very strong one that pulls me out of despair and helps me progress down the straight and narrow. I realized just yesterday that I am indeed on the straight and narrow. Some may call me a prude, some may call me "Molly", but I'm at a point in my life where that's OK. I'll accept the names with grace and relish the fact that I'm choosing the right. I have witnessed so many blessings in our struggles over the past few years and know that I have a loving Father that knows who I am and what I need at just the right time. I believe that the things I do to grow closer to the Savior are accepted and rewarded. My faith has been tried many a time and has seemed to have been snuffed out on occasion, but yet it still grows however slowly that may be.

Originally, I was going to write about all the things that are "screwed" up in my life right now, but it wouldn't make you or me feel any better in the long run. I hope you have been able to count some of your blessings and will share them with me in the future....

Chopped

"Shakespears, you have been chopped" is what I heard in my head as the Stake President read our names from the pulpit. Funny how you can be truckin' along and WHAMMO you're whole life changes.

To make a long story short, the Stake redrew the ward boundaries. The street I live on and the little street behind me were annexed from 2nd ward to 3rd ward. It's about 100 people, but only 15-20 active families. To make sure everyone was on the right page, the Stake President read everyone's name that was to move to the 3rd ward.

We had to say goodbye to our Home Teacher yesterday. He has been coming to our home for the past 48 months and I don't think he's even missed one. He has really been a great home teacher. He mentioned yesterday that he has never had a family that long and we haven't had the same HT that long either. It was really, really hard to sit in my Family room and listen to him say good-bye to us.

I love my 2nd ward. I have felt at home from the beginning. I have never felt judged, never felt unappreciated, never felt like an outsider.

Isn't it funny how we form such special bonds with the people we go to church with? Even though our neighborhood is predominantly LDS, we are more bonded to the people in our Ward? My hope is that the invisable line that separates us as ward members will not separate us as friends.

Family Pictures

A few weeks ago, we ventured to SLC for family pictures. Here's just a sampling of what we got.

Coupon Challenged

"We were the people who were not in the papers. We lived in the blank white spaces at the edge of print. It gave us more freedom. We lived in the gaps between the stories."-Atwood

I may not be published in the newspaper, but I'm writing my story here. Does that mean I've given up my freedom? Does the word define me or do I define the word? HHMMM......

I've been trying to make some adjustments in our family life. One of which is to coupon! I love hearing all the stories about all the money being saved and think how wonderful it would be to apply that to our family budget. I dream of walking into a store and only paying $.50 for a whole bag of groceries. I personally think that is too good to be true....

AND so Karma makes it's way into my life. If I don't believe it, it will never happen, right? I'm not applying "the secret" very well.

In the past 3 weeks, I've only received my papers once. I fail to understand what is so hard about delivering a newspaper. Other than the fact that I'm suppose to have 5 on my doorstep every Sunday. And it's not just me. There are numerous others in my neighborhood who have multiple papers on their driveways. Those red plastic bags glistening in the sun...I'm so jealous that it's not on my driveway. How am I suppose to save $100's of dollars if I don't get my paper?

Maybe I'm just not cut out to cut coupons.

Admissions

I had a realization just now that I need to write down:

I was that girl in High School that seemed to have everything. She had her own car (or van to be more precise; not that glamorous), she got to be out late with her friends, she was a cheerleader, she dated the guy on the football team (just one and he wasn't even the captain AND it was very brief). She just had it all going for her. She got good grades, she was friends with the teachers, she had a large group of friends. You name it, I probably was all those things and so much more to a lot of people. I'm sure most saw me as successful, having my head screwed on straight....I'll even venture to guess that most thought I would travel through life fairly easily and come out the other side just full of optimism, lots of friends, and a nice car to boot.

I hate to break it to ya, but I'm none of those things. More to my point: I'm that girl that had everything in High School and lost it all. High School was so easy compared to being an adult and a Mom and a small business owner. It is DANG hard! Should it really be this hard? I'm sure I'm making it out to be much worse in my head than it is in reality. Some days my children are lucky I don't lock them out of my house just to get some peace and relief, but wait, if I did that then I would worry about them getting hit my a car, or someone snatching them from my porch only to claim a hefty ransom.......

Lately, I am in a gall of reality and it stinks! I cannot see the bend in the road let alone the light at the end of the tunnel. It seems that no matter how hard I try to get a handle on something, anything, it just eludes me. I can't get ahead to save my arse! I guess the lesson here is to just let go. Maybe it eludes me because I'm holding on too tight?

What it comes down to is I feel very mediocre in my life right now. I don't feel that I'm succeeding at anything; there's always so much more to do that the stuff that does get done gets lost. I had a professor in college say: "If you don't stand for something, then you'll fall for everything". I think my mind has changed it a little to read: "It's better to excel at one thing than be mediocre at everything".

I actually know why all this is happening to me right now, it's time for growth. It's time for that hurtful, agonizing growth that our Heavenly Father asks of us once in awhile. Although I don't seem to be fully recovered from my last adventure in this growth arena. So long to "comfortable". I won't be seeing it for awhile.

Heck on Wheels

Samantha is just growing before our eyes. I can't believe that she is riding a two wheeler at 4 years old. She loves to be riding about with her brothers and the other neighborhood boys, but those training wheels were just slowing her down.

Once I was comfortable with her ability to balance on the Razor, I thought it was time to take those wheels off. She was a little wobbly at first, but she has gotten the hang of it. She can even get herself started, if and only if, she's on an incline not unlike our driveway.

This is my baby. This is my little girl and I'm a little sad that she is growing up so fast......That's a lie. I'm so proud of her. I'm so excited for her excursions and becoming more independent each day. I love that we can have conversations and talk over making bracelets and necklaces with her beads. I love that she tried to read the book along with my at night time. She is truly an
amazing little person and one that I love bunches.

Checking In

Just wanted to let everyone know I'm still around. I have some pictures of the last day of school I've been wanting to blog about but haven't found the time.

I've started writing my Dad's biography. It is amazing to learn new things about my Dad that I have never known. He has some amazing stories to tell and some very funny things that have happened in his life. I'm starting to get re-acquainted with my "writers" side. I bet you didn't know that about me, huh?

So between keeping my kids' brains exercised, keeping my body exercised, keeping everyone fed, and writing, I have little energy left over for blogging. I'm trying to save Sunday afternoons for it, but as always, those get filled up rather quickly and unexpectedly.

Sick and Tired...

I'm sick and tired of having sickness in my house.
Someone has been sick in this house since Easter!
We're talking 7 weeks.
WHAT is up with THAT?
I've disinfected the house weekly.
I've had two of my kids to the MD at least 3 times.
I've probably spent a whole pay check on pharmaceuticals.
When does it end?????

Chris is the latest victim and ironically the biggest baby of us all.
So if you see me outside wandering aimlessly, just make sure I'm not in any danger cause chances are I'm half asleep and don't know where I am OR I'm taking a mini vacation from the confines of the sick house.

Mazatlan 2009

What a wonderful trip! After being delayed in Phoenix, we finally arrived in Mazatlan mid afternoon. We had a wonderful view of the beach from our balcony and personal air conditioning in our room. PERFECT!! We explored a little and hit the local grocery store for some snacks. We walked back to the hotel along the beach at sunset. SO PRETTY!

Saturday morning we went Zip Lining at the Huana Coa Canopy. This is the region of Mexico where the desert ends and the rain forests begin. Hence you have HUGE tropical trees mingled with Cacti. We had so much fun. Some of the landings were high up in trees and the last one we repelled off of. Our exursion included a tour of the tequilla plant nearby. It was interesting to learn how they make it, but no drinking it of course.

Upon our return to the hotel, we slipped into our suits and went to the beach. It was so pleasant. The water was nearly as warm as the air. We were body surfing with some friends and minding our own business when I got stung by a jelly fish, bad. Mostly these fish just swim beside you and every once in awhile their tentacles will slide over your arm or something. Not too bad, but this thing wasn't done with my arm. It had to attach itself to my back and just pulsate it's charges into my body. OUCH!! I spent the next few hours dealing with the pain in the privacy of our room. There were quite a few tears shed, but I was back to normal by morning.
We went to dinner with some of the other Dentists and their wives, then hit the beach for a sunset "wedding". Everyone wanted to play volleyball which I sat out of, but when the game switched to soccer, I joined in and took everyone by surprise when I scored the most goals. I think they underestimated the fat chick still suffering with a jelly fish sting.

We spent Sunday by the pool. There was NO WAY I was headed back into that ocean again. I got my yearly sunburn and didn't sleep well our last night. All in all it was such a relaxing trip and we enjoyed ourselves immensely. After having a weekend away, we realize yet again how important it is for us during this turbulent time to remove ourselves from the chaos and focus on one another. We are recharged and ready to deal with the business, family, church callings and demands by our children.

So as many of you know, I teach the Marriage and Family Relations class in our Ward. I have learned so much and it has truly been a joy to teach and share with the couples in our Ward.

I have a new found appreciation for my marriage and our relationship. Although at times, I feel as if our marriage is suffering, we always work it out. Where the recession is concerned, we haven't had the best financial situation our entire married life, so we don't know any better. Where the H1V1 virus is concerned, we have our own personal stash of face masks thanks to his career.

We really have a great marriage. We are as in love with one another if not more than the day we married. We're definitely more in love than when we first met.....it took 2 years to finally hook up to "dating" status. I really love my husband and am so glad he chose me to be his companion. As much as I hate to admit it, I went to BYU for my MRS because I'm not marketable with my BS.

A week ago in class, we had a quote by President Boyd K. Packer regarding the shield of faith:

“Our Father’s plan requires that, like the generation of life itself, the shield of faith is to be made and fitted in the family. No two can be exactly alike. Each must be handcrafted to individual specifications.

“The plan designed by the Father contemplates that man and woman, husband and wife, working together, fit each child individually with a shield of faith made to buckle on so firmly that it can neither be pulled off nor penetrated by those fiery darts.

“It takes the steady strength of a father to hammer out the metal of it and the tender hands of a mother to polish and fit it on. Sometimes one parent is left to do it alone. It is difficult, but it can be done.

“In the Church we can teach about the materials from which a shield of faith is made: reverence, courage, chastity, repentance, forgiveness, compassion. In church we can learn how to assemble and fit them together. But the actual making of and fitting on of the shield of faith belongs in the family circle. Otherwise it may loosen and come off in a crisis” (in Conference Report, Apr. 1995, 8; or Ensign, May 1995, 8).

I learned so much from this one quote. I learned that the gospel being taught in Primary and other organizations is a "one size fits all". It is up to us as parents to shape and mold it onto our children. It is up to us to help then recognize the spirit and answers to prayers. It is up to us to help them understand how they fit into the Eternal Plan. It is up to us to help them know the story behind the First Vision and what happened because of it. It is up to us to make the gospel personal to each of our children. What fit's for Zac will not necessarily fit for Tyler or Samantha.

WOW, what responsibility! I'm so grateful Chris and I are up to the challenge. I'm so grateful that we are true to our covenants and promises. I'm grateful that we have a home that tries to invite the Spirit in and learn from it. There is always room for improvement and it takes line upon line.

So there you have it. Dad, you owe me a Hot Fuge Sunday!

Biggest Loser

When I first saw this show years ago, I wasn't a big fan. I wasn't thrilled with the term "loser" in the title. Since, I have become a BIG fan. I watch religiously and root for my favorites. I'm amazed at the transformations these people accomplish is such a short amount of time. I have a favorite trainer, and I would still love to experience something like that.

Over the last few years, as the season has come to a close, I have reflected on my failures. When each new season starts, I vow to work right along with them. I think in my head that I will be able to make some changes and actually lose some weight. I always come up short. I usually get down and depressed that I didn't do it yet AGAIN. Although I love the show, it was pure torture to see these people make significant changes in their lives, and yet here I sit at home still in the "wishing" stage.

Tonight some of the contestants tried on some "goal" outfits. I thought to myself, "I've got some stuff in storage.....maybe?" So I dug them out. I have one pair of pants that fit 5 years ago and one dress I wore to my mission homecoming (I'm not telling you how long ago that was). At first, I was reluctant. I didn't want to set myself up for failure. I didn't even try the mission dress. I know full well that I don't want to stuff this body in that dress. However, the pants were a different story; THEY FIT! I got them over my ample behind and zipped and buttoned up. WOW! I was amazed. I was amazed at MY transformation. Granted, I will not be wearing them in public tomorrow, but give me 2 more weeks and they WILL fit comfortably. YEAH ME!!!

Although my transformation is taking a much longer route, I am doing it! I am making changes and setting goals to finally kick this monkey off my back. It hasn't been easy, but man has it been worth it. Tonight, I'm not depressed. I'm happy. I'm full of determination to make it to my goal weight and prove to myself that I CAN DO THIS!

Gifts Galore

Copied from my good friend Amy: (she had great taste)

Here is the deal: The first five people to comment on this post will get something made by me. My choice. For you.

This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

I make no guarantees that you will like what I make.
What I make will be just for you.
It'll be done this year.
You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. No guarantees, I may sew or stitch or bake something. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
I reserve the right to do whatever I want!

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must re-post this on your own blog and offer the same deal to 5 of your own lucky blog readers.

So, the first 5 people to leave a comment telling me they are in, win a homemade gift by me!

Be sure to post a picture of what you win when you get it.

Growing Up

I've endured a lot of growing pains the last few weeks and thought I would catch y'all up on what's been happening.

First, I feel like I've been bending over backwards to be friends with people who just aren't reciprocating. I finally realized that instead of putting all my efforts into people who really don't care, I should be spending time working on my testimony and really getting to know the Savior. I've learned that when all is said and done, He's the one that matters the most. Although I regret and feel bad when my "friendship" efforts are rejected, I will actually be rejected if I don't have that personal relationship with the Savior at the end of my journey. Don't misread this. I still want friends. I still want to be sociable. I just won't be so focused on being involved in everything.

Second, I'm finally making headway where my weight loss is concerned. I've put my money where my mouth is and have found an organization that is helping me tremendously. They focus on Mental, Physical and Nutritional aspects of weight loss. I have found more success in the past 5 weeks than I was on my own in 5 months time. To date, I have lost 10 pounds and 15 inches. I feel better and I'm changing my outlook on time, food and exercise. I feel blessed to have found a place that is within my "price" range. When it comes right down to it, I had to just choose a plan and just trust the process. I'm pleased to report that I'm doing great and I'm actually enjoying the journey and not cringing every time I step on that scale twice a week.

Third, I've come face to face with mortality. No one has past on....yet, but I've learned the value of life. I'm trying to take each day for what it has to offer and make it memorable. A wise woman (my Beehive Advisor) once told me that it's the relationships that matter in this life. I would add that it's the relationships with family in particular that matter most. I'm trying to really make an effort to love and accept my extended family and what they have to offer our relationship.

Fourth, I've learned the value of myself. I've suffered from depression and still do. It is very difficult sometimes to even get out of bed and participate in life. I have had terrible self-talk and have just said the most awful things to myself on a daily basis. I've been trying to re-program my self-talk and self-image and I'm making progress. It helps to be succeeding at something I've failed at numerous times. I finally believe I'm worth it.

My Two Cents....

Blogs: I really, really like blogs.

Friendships: I am who I am. Either you love me or you don't.

Teaching: I love, love, love it. I come home with such a high for the rest of the day.

Politics: I'm not one to discuss my political views.

Scouts: The vain of my existence.

Weather: I'm tired of the snow. Bring on the flowers.

Life: It's fun. I think I like it.

I had written an epistle to begin with, but decided it was time to just offer my two cents worth rather than the full quarter. You don't want to know that much about me....

Last of the Birthdays

We did it! We made it through another year of monthly birthdays. I'm so glad to not have to think about another one until November. I feel bad for Samantha cuz she's last and I'm about out of steam by the time hers rolls around.

Here's her cake. I had fun doing it. Not very original, but fun and easy which in always nice.
The little tiara blinked little LED lights. It was cool. Sam really liked it.

Happy Birthday, Samantha!

My little baby girl turned 4 today. Very hard to believe that she's in preschool, gymnastics, and sunbeams. They do, in fact, grow up fast (in retrospect). We love Sami for so many reasons but here are just 4:

1- She's is so sweet and we're not just talking disposition. This girl has a raging sweet tooth. She learned the art of climbing the cabinets just to get to the little treat stash in the cupboard. We have become quite creative in where we store the special treats in our home.

2-She is quite the little Mother in the making. She has named all her dolls, teddy bears, etc. with most of them having the same names of our neighbors. She loves them and takes care of them. She makes sure they are taken care of before bedtime and checks on them throughout the day. Sometimes she'll tell me she's playing Helen with baby Austin in tow.

3- She's agreeable for the most part. She desires so much to be included with her older brothers and their friends, that she will gladly be errand girl and jump to their beck and call. She loves to play outside with them and feel so grown-up when she gets to be out there with the rest of the neighborhood.

4-She's very independent. She can pour her own milk for her cereal (provided its not a full gallon), she loves to set the table and choose where everyone sits, and she dresses herself most days choosing some pretty interesting ensembles. Sunday, she wanted to wear her Cinderella skirt under her dress to church......

All in all, we love our little Sami Paige. She is a joy to have around and brings lots of smiles to us.

Carpe Diem

My absolute favorite show growing up was Dead Poets Society. I watched it today for the first time since High School. I was reminded why I love it so. It's such a beautiful movie and I'm not just talking about the boys.

The premise of the whole movie is individuality; not conforming to society and becoming passionate about your life. I guess that is why I studied Sociology in school. I'm fascinated by those who seek out their interests and take action. My brain is full of half-cocked ideas of who I want to be. In reality, I don't believe I'm anything like what I "want" to be. I think I'm so bogged down with the "what nots" to live in the present and suck the morrow out of my life.

I was so set on not being ordinary, that it's now my reality. I feel very ordinary. I still feel like a teenager trying to find my strengths, interests and talents. As I think about my life and my interests, I feel very much like the conformist.

So here's the question: How does a housewife seize the day? What do you do to suck the morrow out of your life?

In your perception, how do I Carpe Diem?

Monkey Cake

I thought I would give you an update about the Birthday cake situation. I think we wised up after Zac's because Tyler's came off without a hitch! It was actually fun to put together. Thanks goodness for Family Fun Mag and other online resources.

Happy Birthday, Tyler!

Tyler just turned 7. Wow! I can't believe it. So here's a few things about Tyler and why we love him.

1. He has only been in a hurry once in his lifetime: when he was born. He was 4 weeks and 1 day early. (No, we didn't plan on having a Valentine's Day Baby) Because of that 1 day, he was treated as a Preemie with 8 hours in the NICU. He was totally fine though weighing a whopping 5 lbs. We were able to go home at the usual time.

2.Tyler is our little peacemaker expect for when it comes to Sami. That girls knows how to push his buttons. He is the sweetest, most easy goin' kid you'll ever meet. He is quick to give hugs and kisses and just melts my heart when his face lights up in anticipation of something great.

3. This kid likes to tinker. He is big into building stuff and making new configurations with his Lego's and other various building materials. He has a great imagination when it comes to making new things.

4. He is very sensitive to the atmosphere around him. I relate him to "Jasper". He has a calming influence on every situation. He knows when the Spirit is absent where ever he may be: a quality I hope he keeps with him throughout the years.

5. He is quick to obey. He knows when he's done something wrong. When I ask him to go spend his Time-Out in the corner, he goes willingly with minimal fuss, not like someone else in our family.....He's also very willing to help when we ask him.

6. He is very diligent in his learning. He may not pick up on something very quickly, but once he's got it, he's got it. He doesn't give up. He's willing to try new things when it's presented to him and review it until he's sure he's got it.

7. He is a HAM! He loves to dominate camera time. He is quick to pull the funny faces and laugh at himself. He is just a joy to have around and makes you feel better if you've had a rough day.

We love you Tyler!

See that big fish? That one is Tyler's. No joke

Private Anatomy

I'm a fan of Grey's Anatomy.

I'm even a partial fan of Private Practice.

I'm NOT a fan of the cross-over event. ENOUGH ALREADY. Go back to your respective cities and leave each other alone! Too much DRAMA! Oh wait, I guess that's why they call it a soap, huh?

Overboard

I thought all you Twilight fans would get a kick outta this. I think it's a little over the top, but hey, if you have the space, the infatuation, and a very understanding husband, then be my guest.

Christi Ann and Her Terrible No Good Day

First of all, let me tell you that I'm a sleeper. I need my sleep. If I don't get the required 7-8 hours of sleep, I have a hard time functioning.

• Sasha woke me up about 1/2 hour before my alarm. I HATE it when that happens.
  
• It was snowing outside which equals a crappy commute for DH.
  
• He's trying to get out the door early but needs to add his John Hancock to some checks and is seeking for a deposit pouch. Well, he already has one in his bag, why he needs another is beyond me. So, he leaves in a huff.
• Enter bill time. I hate bills. I hate my bills more than I hate the office bills. But I think you know by now that I hate bills. Well, Chris has had to re-classify some bills where my bookkeeping is concerned but hasn't let me in on his "code".
  
• I have to hand-write checks to get them paid only to have to enter them in later. UGH!
• I try to relax by checking email and seeing who's online, but wait, there's a problem. The computer was powerless and "forgot" the IP address. Hence no internet.
  
• Did I mention the cable was out too?
• After 2 hours volunteering at the school, I learn that my phone is dead. No contacting MIL to cancel lunch plans.
• I planned to make cream puffs with the kids after school. Bought the wrong dough. Not gonna happen.
  
• We decide on DH's favorite cookies. Use the Cuisinart. Didn't mix it. Had to dirty another bowl and hand mixer only to find out the dough was too tough for the mixer! UGH!

Today is a bust. I can only hope that tomorrow will be better. Is it bedtime yet?

Better Than......

Chris made me a Birthday Cake. It was chocolate. It was mixed with Diet Coke. It had Heath bars crunched into the batter and on top. It had caramel topping soaked into the cake after baking. It had whipped topping to cover the decadence. Talk about too much of a good thing. It was yummy delicious for about the first bite, then it was just pure torture to consume. It's name is Better Than S** Cake and I suppose one might lose control while eating such good eats, but not this girl. I'll settle for my man anytime, anywhere. I definitely had to limit my exposure to this "pleasure" in a pan, but not so with my man. Are you blushing yet? I am. TMI, TMI

The Big 3-5...oh wait it's acutally 3-4

Don't you hate it when you give yourself an extra year?!?!?!

I thought it would be good therapy to write 34 things I like/love about myself......
1.





But I just don't have the time or energy tonight. It's been a wonderful birthday for me. I went to a chickflick and lunch with my mom and sister. Then Chris took me out to Goodwood for dinner and a wonderfully funny show at Desert Star. I even came home to goodies on my porch! Thanks guys! I have the best-est friends and family. I guess I'd have more luck naming 34 people who love me, but I wouldn't be able to stop at just 34 ;)

Resolutions #2

I will walk 10000 steps a day. This is something I need to work up to, but that's the point of a goal, right? I have already determined how I will go about this. I just purchased Walk Away the Pounds with bands for toning along with the workout videos. Yes, they are sometimes tedious but I figure with this and the treadmill, I will be able to keep myself motivated. So if anyone is interested in taking a walk and don't mind having a 50 lb Basset along for the stroll, give me a call. I''ll be more than willing.

Mother

Our book group is reading The Mother in Me which is a collection of essays around motherhood, in all it's aspects. I just wanted to give a shout-out to all those "mothers" in my life that take care of me, nurture me, watch over me, befriend me, and leave lasting improvement upon my character and heart. Most of you who will read this have made an impact on my life and I thank you for it.

To me a mother is someone who nurtures, protects, teaches, and serves those around them. It is a woman who can give of herself without a second thought as to why she is or who is to benefit from her service. Are we not all mothers?

Update:

Ok so I resisted the cheese fries, but that diet coke sure knows how to cure those woes. Once an addict, always an addict I guess.

Rambling PHAT Dreams

My dream last night has really made me stop and think. I had reached my boiling point and chewed out a friend in front of many friends (pounce night). Boy was I livid and did everyone know it. I hope that many of you reading this will think, "That's totally out of character for her". I strive very hard to keep things in check and not allow y'all to see me lose it.

Having said that, I'm not my own best friend. If you think some pretty nasty things about others occasionally, I've told them to myself regularly. I am an adult victim of childhood abuse. Before you freak out, let me explain. As a young child I was molested/abused by someone I trusted and was trusted by my family. My mind was very efficient in repressing this memory and keeping life good for me for many many years. It wasn't until Zacory reached the age of which I was abused that the floodgates opened and opened WIDE. Having talked with professionals, this is actually quite normal and happens often in these situations. I have spent that last 5 years trying to reconcile the emotions of my past life experiences with my current life and still struggle from time to time...often to be honest. I am dealing with the effects of childhood abuse as an adult.

I'm obese. Ironically, it has been in the last 5 years that I have gained all of it. Granted, I have had two more children who have contributed to this state of being, but cannot be blamed for all of it. It's very easy to blame it on my molester and the repressed feelings of history. I'm sure that's part of it, too. I'm also part of family with the genetics to predispose me to obesity. Just look at the family picture taken this summer at our family reunion. Half of us are overweight. Those are all really good reasons for my current state of being. However, I think the real reason I'm like I am is because I don't love myself. I guess I have to like myself somewhat otherwise things would be very different. I guess I don't see myself worthy of a happy, healthy life?

I'm tired. I'm tired of everything. I'm tired of working my @#$-ets off just to lose 1 stinkin' pound. I'm frustrated that I can have a week of eating "clean" and working out every day to only lose a few ounces only to have a week full of holiday feasting and lose a pound. I'm tired of a finicky body. I'm tired of always being reminded that I'm not succeeding at this venture. I have gained and lost the same 4-5 pounds over the past 5 months. I'm tired of stepping on that scale every week with a pit in my stomach and a question in my mind, "Please, please, be a good number".

With all that being tired, I can't bring myself to even try. I've lost my drive. I watch those around me and those featured on "fat" shows and think, "Good for them, that will never be me". I hear people say all the time, "If I can do it, anybody can do it?" Really? Is that really true? I guess the question is why them and not me? What makes me so much different from them? I guess the question to be asking is if I'm ready to shed my shell; physically, emotionally, socially....

I don't know. Thanks for sticking with me through such a long post. I'll go get my diet coke and cheese fries and everything will be better tomorrow, right?

Publicity

I've had a private blog for about a week and it's driving me CRAZY! I thrive on the feedback to fuel my insanity. I've reverted back to a public account so I can be on everyone's reader and get my ramblings out there. Thank You to all of you who accepted the invite I sent you. I may try it again in the future, but for now, the life of my blog depends on it.

Resolutions #1

A good friend of mine has a blog about no more grocery shopping. Her one month experiment of not going to the grocery store really inspired me. I did my own experiment in December and liked it so much, I've resolved to do this every month.




I planned all of my meals for the month. I only go grocery shopping twice, after payday. That way I feel better about replacing the perishables like milk, eggs, cheese and produce. It really worked out nicely. With the busy-ness of the holidays and lots of not knowing where you're going to be from week to week and last minute get togethers, it was a relief to not always be planning and shopping and just running around. BTW, it saved me about $500. Not bad if I do say so myself.

Along with this resolution to keep this up, I will be weeding out my recipe cupboard. As I use a recipe, I will consolidate. I have many magazines up there that I only use one or two recipes out of and they take up a lot of space.


I haven't decided if I will catalog these recipes on the computer or if I will hand write them to include in my recipe box. I don't know. Still looking for "da bomb" of recipe collections.....Any suggestions?

Happy New Year!

How did you spend the last minutes of 2008? Were you surrounded my family and friends? Were you lying in bed watching the "ball" drop only to roll over and go to sleep at 12:01 am? Or were you like me and was jamming to Guitar Hero and totally missed the hoopla.

We had a quiet evening at home. We allowed the kids to stay up as late as they could and toasted the new year with Chicago.




After getting the kiddos in bed, Chris and I started jammin'. We finished a gig and then both asked "I wonder if it's midnight yet?". As we both looked at our watches, we were shocked to notice it was 12:05! WHAT! I missed the celebrating with everyone else? We just looked at each other and laughed, gave each other a quick kiss and then played our encore.