Purpose: To Seek

First of all, thanks to everyone who left comments. I'm happy to hear that some of you liked the idea of a "theme" word for the year and that it's spreading to other blogs.

I went in search of my Patriarchal Blessing and found my old missionary journal. I just found a treasure that I will peruse in the coming weeks. Anyhow, I went looking for this blessing so I could remind myself what Heavenly Father's purpose for my life is. It seems so simple, doesn't it?

I remember this blessing and I remember when Patriarch Warner was finishing up, me paused and added pretty much an addendum to my blessing. I have always thought that this was MY PURPOSE in a nutshell. It reads as follows:

Learn the wisdom of the world. Learn the wisdom of God, that those things will be for your good, that you might be able to associate with, and to teach, people of great thoughts and great ideas.

When I was in college, I did a lot of 101 classes to try and determine what I wanted to study. I'll never forget sitting in the very first class of Sociology 101 and the grad student said "Sociology really is the wisdom of the world." I had never before heard those words used together except for in the scriptures and in my blessing. I was hooked and continued my studies of Sociology (which I LOVED).

So, the question remains, what am I doing to learn the wisdom of God? Serving a mission was a good start: it was an intense study of all things Gospel. But I think living the Gospel has taught me more wisdom than actually studying it.

Here we are to the next idea: teaching people of great thoughts and ideas. I think all my thoughts are great as well as my ideas. But I'm sure not all of you would agree. But what am I doing to teach? And where are all the people? I don't know.... Maybe at this point in my life I'm teaching my children.

The theme for our Relief Society this year is to "Appreciate the past.....shape your future". Now that I think about it, finding my journal will be a great reminder of who I use to be and maybe identify the path I've taken to get me here.

Lessons learned to date:

• One purpose of Diet Coke is to save me a small fortune in not only therapy, but in migraine medicine as well.
• One purpose of sisters is to have someone to call and vent upon having a terrible day only to find out her day trumps yours exponentially.
  
• One purpose of service is to have a great time with friends while doing something productive.
  

Beginnings

Boy, it's been awhile. Sorry for being MIA for last last few months. I've been trying to get my disposition more "sunny" for y'all and finally decided that those who read this read it because I'm real. So, I'm back and will strive to write not only about me but about the fam as well.

I've been thinking A LOT about resolutions and improving one's life. In the past I've made a laundry list of things to work on and always seem to fail by Valentine's Day. I joke that I try to maintain my mediocrity, but I really do want to improve.

I was thinking just the other day that I'm nearly 37 and still care so much about what other people think of me, that I still feel that I'm trying to find out who I am. Why has this alluded me for so long?

I'm tired. I'm tired of making the same resolutions year after year. I'm tired of seeming to fight the same battles month after month. So this is the year to begin a new chapter. I'm NOT going to resolve to lose weight, organize my home, walk 10,000 steps a day, find a way to make money to supplement our income. I'm tired of it ALL.

Instead I'm going to take a page from a friend of mine. She chooses one word to live by for the year, like CLEAN or COMPLETE. I think this is very wise for it's easy to remember what your theme is for the year and reflect on it daily. My word for this year is:

PURPOSE

I want to have more purpose in my life. I want to identify what the purpose is for my life. I think I need to be reminded of this. I also feel that this word will help me to live by my values. I know I have them, but how often do I really live by them? I also think that by trying to live more purposefully, I will find the joy and peace and understanding of who I am. I think this will help me to live in the moment and not wait for something better to be just around the corner or to do what everyone else is doing (note the irony).