What would it be like to...

• live in a place where you couldn't say the name of Jesus out loud?
• live in a place where you couldn't worship God?
• have never sinned?
• never have to plan another lesson for my 3rd graders?
• never stress over money again?
• to go to work every day and enjoy it?
• to not be tired?
• to never compare yourself with your peers?
• to feel secure in who you are?
• to be fully content in where the Lord has you?

These are just some of the questions I've pondered lately.

Seriously...

lacking motivation to teach right now. We have about 3.5 weeks until the EOG (End of Grade) test and my kids are off the wall and so not into doing anything that requires too much thinking. Because of their lack of interest, I have a lack of interest. I don't feel like spending all my time planning great and creative lessons if they aren't going to pay attention. I just really want summer to be here. Only about 30 some days left...I can do it... maybe I need to give myself the little pep up song like the little train who could did..."I think I can, I think I can.."

PRAISE THE LORD!

A huge praise! Wednesday I was offered (and I accepted) a teaching position at a new school for next school year!! I'm soooo excited because I just really needed a change after the year I have had. There are many perks to this new school; first, it is like 5 minutes from our apartment instead of the 25 I drive currently. Second, its a smaller school with no IB magnet program! There is usually only 2 classes per grade and on top of that they team teach so I could potentially teach math and science all day and my teammate could teach the language arts block. It makes planning so much easier! The principal and the staff are extremely down to earth and inviting.

I'm just really excited about the change and feel like it's going to be a breath of fresh air after the year I have had. The Lord's timing and plan is perfect...He continues to remind me how He provides for our every need.

Also another praise, the Lord has open some wonderful opportunities for me to share information about my trip and faith to others. Many want to support me in any way they can so I feel confident that the Lord will provide the money needed for this trip. I also have applied for my passport and am working on getting my shots. Things are falling into place nicely! :)

Easter 2006

Happy Easter! Can I just tell you about much love Easter! First is that it is a celebration that Jesus Christ rose from the dead! I'm grateful that today we get a chance to remember what an awesome sacrifice He made for us. I also love that its a time to get together with my family. To the left is our newest family portrait taken on the steps of my aunts house. What you can't see very well from the picture is that all the boys together would make quite a lovely Easter egg. :) We all have on new outfits because hey my mom is old school and everyone must have a new Easter outfit. I'm not complaining though b/c she bought me the dress.

Today was a wonderful day of family and food! You may not know but I'm currently obsessed with my family and enjoy being with them any time I can. It's funny how your perspective changes over time. As you can see from the picture here, Dad and I enjoyed a nice nap together this afternoon with me sleeping on his shoulder. What can I say, I'm still a daddy's girl!
I hope you enjoyed your afternoon as well. Happy Easter!

South Africa Bound!

So it's been decided...I'm South Africa bound this summer! I'm so excited as this is my first overseas mission trip. :) I'll be going with my church to Johannesburg to serve beside 14 other people serving the Lord! We'll be doing a vacation Bible study and a children's leaders training.


Quite honestly, I'm just amazed on how the Holy Spirit has changed my attitude toward missions. Growing up our church was never really into missions and I thought it was only for the "real Godly" people and that was not me. This change in attitude has not been an overnight change by any means; the Lord has been working on my heart since I first started college. Throughout college, the Lord revealed to me through different people just how important it is to share the Gospel to the lost. I have heard so many stories that have made me realize how easy we have life here. We are free to speak and worship as we please. So many people here have at least heard the Jesus and speak of God. We are the fortunate ones but others have not been. Romans 10:14 says"How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?" Someone has to go and teach them! Someone has to share the good news of Christ with them or they will never know. As this realization has come about, I realized that I have a part to play. I need to tell others what Christ has done for me. He came to earth to pay my penalty, my sin! He died on the cross that I may have everlasting life! This gift is there for all and it my responsibility to tell others about him. This has given me motivation now to go overseas and tell them about Jesus.

But on the flip side, I feel convicted that I am so eager to go overseas and share the Gospel but I'm afraid to speak out for him here in America. I'm so afraid of what would happen....the akwardness that could result with my coworkers. I think it comes down to my own pride. Why am I more concerned with my glory than His? I need to care less about myself and more about making Him known. Mark 13:10 says "And the gospel must first be preached to all nations. " This is all nations, including my little town to the ends of the earth.

So on that note, I also have to raise my own support. The trip is estimated at $2,500. I've never had to raise support but I'm confident that if the Lord wants me to go on this trip that He will provide the finances. He has shown me time and time again how He can provide for our every need. I'm excited to see Him in work in this situation as well. (if you would like to contribute, send me an email :) )

I'm just really excited!! can you tell? :)

Always looking to the next step...

My dad used to always tell me, "You're never happy where you are. You're always wish you were somewhere else." The more I go through life, the more I realize it's true. I am constantly looking to what comes next. For instance,

• When I was in elementary school, I couldn't wait for middle school.
• When I was in middle school, I couldn't wait for high school and to be able to drive.
• After that I couldn't wait to graduate and go to college.
• In college, I couldn't wait until I found Mr. Right and could get married. I couldn't wait to graduate and get married and start my life as a teacher.
• Now that I'm married, I can't wait to be a mom.
• I can't wait until Jeremy is done with seminary so we can start a family.

My life has been one continous state of looking on to the next step. Why is that I can never be content with where the Lord has me? Why can I just sit back and enjoy the ride? So many times in my life, I say I'm going to be content and enjoy the season, but that's all it really is..just saying it and never doing it. I've tried and tried. I've continued to pray about and talk to others about it but I still struggle with it. Any suggestions?

A sense of comfort...

Tonight J and I traveled the lovely highway 98 for 45 minutes to eat dinner at "home" with my parents. I love going "home". Yes I still call it home because I still consider it my home. I know I'm married now and J and I have a great apartment here in Wake Forest, part of me will always live in Rocky Mount. As much smack as I talk about the "City on the Rise" it is home. I lived there for 17 years of my life; I can tell you everything about that town. I amazes me how the place never changes and I can feel like I've never left. I was presently surprised tonight though as I was driving in how many changes had taken place. They are actually catching up with the rest of the world in terms of shopping.

What I love most about Rocky Mount is the sense of comfort I feel when I'm there. It is all so comfortable to me. Walking into "my parent's house" just feels safe and relaxing. I don't feel the need to do anything or go anywhere, I can just be. I realize now how much I appreciate and love my parents. I take them and their close proximity for granted so much and its nice to just be with them. Ok I've been sappy enough tonight...