Today I will say goodbye to blogging.
I have had a nice run for the past 7 years sharing my life experiences and opinions with those who were nice enough to read.
It has kept my writing skills sharp enough for my liking.
It encouraged me to see my life as interesting enough to be shared.
It has allowed me to make new friends; those whom without blogging/internet I probably would not have met or befriended.
I've had a nice time. But I think it's time to retire.
For those who use this blog to keep in touch with me, e-mail is something I use more than 4 times a day :-)
If you're wondering why I am retiring, let's just say I've had my fill of the blogging world. Among the lessons learnt are
1. Everyone has an opinion.
2. Words are cheap; anyone can say anything.
3. There is no such thing as privacy on the internet.
4. People are generally nosy to know about other people's lives but do not want to ask the tuan punya badan.
5. Everyone's life is interesting. It's just a matter of how you write about it.
6. Everyone complains all the time. It's boring to listen/read because you complain a lot too but don't realise it.
7. Sometimes there is no Ctrl-Z.
8. Cut and paste should be banned. Be original.
It's been great.
Goodbye, blog.
Sunday, 21 November 2010
Saturday, 20 November 2010
Slump
You know when you're feeling a bit down, unmotivated, easily offended, moody, anxious, serabut kepala otak...
Maybe we shouldn't be quick to put it down to "stress" or "PMS/hormones".
Maybe our imaan is low and needs a boost.
Maybe we shouldn't be quick to put it down to "stress" or "PMS/hormones".
Maybe our imaan is low and needs a boost.
Friday, 19 November 2010
Hmm
Remember I said I kinda missed meeting other people?
Now I remember why I rarely do unless they're actually my friends.
I don't like the farce of forced amicability.
And sorry... I don't like doing the kissing and the hugging of people I don't even know the names of.
Now I remember why I rarely do unless they're actually my friends.
I don't like the farce of forced amicability.
And sorry... I don't like doing the kissing and the hugging of people I don't even know the names of.
Wednesday, 17 November 2010
Initiation by fire
Retrospectively I am extremely grateful that I was sent to Warragul for a term in Emergency. Because I think I learnt at least 85% whereas currently I am only learning 15% perhaps?
This time around we don't get to see Cat 1 & 2 patients. (Not that I want to, don't get me wrong). But there won't be a lot of learning opportunities.
In fact, the intern is so insignificant that no-one would notice if you weren't there. All of our patients have to be double checked by the consultant. Time-consuming and sometimes demeaning. After all, we are inexperienced, not stupid.
Which makes me conclude, that the only way to learn effectively is to learn through hardship. Being forced to face your fears (mine was Paediatric patients) and climb out of your comfort zone.
Despite the painful experience (I wouldn't want to go back, of course), but I appreciate it now. Because now I can be happy lounging in my comfort zone at the moment because I've already done most of the learning at Warragul. There's more to learn, of course...but it can take some time. Heeeeee :)
Favourite patients:
Young women 19-30 age range (gynae problems- love it)
Any young person presenting with right side abdominal pain (usually surgical- simple)
Fractures (simple- refer ortho or put a plaster on)
People with renal stones/gallstones (also quite effective to manage)
Least preferred patients:
Anyone older than 75 (too complex)
Multiple presenters (whatever they have is usually psychogenic- time wasting just to get them out again)
People with drug dependencies (aggressive, abusive, hard to get rid of)
Chest pain (urgh, just hate the process of managing it)
Ulcers, gangrenous extremities, malaena (common factor: the stench)
Teenagers (especially histrionic female ones - tak kose!)
This time around we don't get to see Cat 1 & 2 patients. (Not that I want to, don't get me wrong). But there won't be a lot of learning opportunities.
In fact, the intern is so insignificant that no-one would notice if you weren't there. All of our patients have to be double checked by the consultant. Time-consuming and sometimes demeaning. After all, we are inexperienced, not stupid.
Which makes me conclude, that the only way to learn effectively is to learn through hardship. Being forced to face your fears (mine was Paediatric patients) and climb out of your comfort zone.
Despite the painful experience (I wouldn't want to go back, of course), but I appreciate it now. Because now I can be happy lounging in my comfort zone at the moment because I've already done most of the learning at Warragul. There's more to learn, of course...but it can take some time. Heeeeee :)
Favourite patients:
Young women 19-30 age range (gynae problems- love it)
Any young person presenting with right side abdominal pain (usually surgical- simple)
Fractures (simple- refer ortho or put a plaster on)
People with renal stones/gallstones (also quite effective to manage)
Least preferred patients:
Anyone older than 75 (too complex)
Multiple presenters (whatever they have is usually psychogenic- time wasting just to get them out again)
People with drug dependencies (aggressive, abusive, hard to get rid of)
Chest pain (urgh, just hate the process of managing it)
Ulcers, gangrenous extremities, malaena (common factor: the stench)
Teenagers (especially histrionic female ones - tak kose!)
Sunday, 14 November 2010
Blessings
The slave does not deserve anything.
Whatever is given to us is only by the generosity and mercy of our Master.
Whatever is given to us is only by the generosity and mercy of our Master.
Saturday, 13 November 2010
Prolonged cough
Layth has had a cough for the past 4-5 months. It never stopped. It changed character in the meantime though. Sometimes it would be dry, moist or croupy. We treated it accordingly with cough linctus, prednisolone and/or Ventolin puffer (with spacer). It's very common for children to get respiratory infections at this age anyway. Especially if they attend childcare. It's also very common for them to get one cold after another.
Anyway, 4 months seems long enough to get a ongoing cough. So I took Layth to see a GP. After some discussion, the doctor suggested a trial of Seretide puffer (steroid & long acting bronchodilator puffer) for 3 weeks. If his cough goes away, then most likely the diagnosis is asthma. If the cough still persists, it may just be recurrent colds/cough.
Layth only had 2 doses of the Seretide puffer and he's not coughing any more!
Alhamdulillah.
But then, does this mean he has asthma?
Whatever it is, he's really handy with the puffer!
Anyway, 4 months seems long enough to get a ongoing cough. So I took Layth to see a GP. After some discussion, the doctor suggested a trial of Seretide puffer (steroid & long acting bronchodilator puffer) for 3 weeks. If his cough goes away, then most likely the diagnosis is asthma. If the cough still persists, it may just be recurrent colds/cough.
Layth only had 2 doses of the Seretide puffer and he's not coughing any more!
Alhamdulillah.
But then, does this mean he has asthma?
Whatever it is, he's really handy with the puffer!
Friday, 12 November 2010
The Dole
For those unfamiliar with the concept of a charity state, Australia is one of them. England is the best charity state that's why they have lots of immigrants.
Anyhoo. Here, if you are a resident/citizen and unemployed for any reason you will get an allowance from the government. You will get $1000 paid fortnightly. Which is $2000 a month (and significantly more than our MARA scholarships as a student dulu ye).
Since I now pay taxes (and a lot of it, too) I do not mind having my hard-earned money to pay for people who cannot work because they have a disability, a mental illness or have to care for their sick family members. In fact, it's a nice way to make sadaqah.
BUT. I cannot stand that the money I worked hard to get goes to people who are LAZY and USELESS and don't even bother to go find a decent job and get money for their own use. Instead they use the money to buy cigarettes, drugs, booze and then become so good-for-nothing that no-one in their right mind would want to employ them. And these people rock up to the hospital (because it's free, if they went to a clinic they'd have to pay) drunk or recently overdosed or allegedly in pain because they want free medications.
Unfortunately I see a lot of these kind of people as patients. It just makes me seethe. How would you feel?
I have lived with LESS than that amount of money when I was a student. Yes it was tight but you won't die from starvation. You could still have a comfortable home and good food. You could still go out once in a while and have things you like. You can save up and buy things that you want or go places. We got an allowance but we had a "job" too. Our job was to study. If we didn't have enough money, we sold things, made things and sold them, get a casual job and lots of other ways.
So if someone is unemployed and getting easy allowance every fortnight, then what to they do all day? Able-bodied people just staying at home doing nothing...what do they do? Wallow in self pity with booze and cigarettes and smoke and lament about their pitiful life yet do nothing to improve that life. Then they become depressed, try to commit suicide, abuse their family/children, get assaulted during a drunk episode.
Save up for a training course for something, at least. Clean yourself up. Sober up. Volunteer. Study, read, learn. Improve yourself. The idle hands are the devil's hands. There are lots of work opportunities for everyone who wants it. It's just a matter of wanting it or not.
Indeed from all this I understand why Allah says He does not change those who do not change themselves.
Whenever I see people like that I always think of the story of Abdul Rahman ibn Auf. He was the richest man in Makkah. When he migrated to Madinah, he had nothing. He was in poverty. But what did he do? He looked for a business opportunity. He found that no one sold firewood at the market. So he went out in the heat to look for firewood to sell at the market. He was prosperous again in no time.
These days, people are allergic to hard work.
Anyhoo. Here, if you are a resident/citizen and unemployed for any reason you will get an allowance from the government. You will get $1000 paid fortnightly. Which is $2000 a month (and significantly more than our MARA scholarships as a student dulu ye).
Since I now pay taxes (and a lot of it, too) I do not mind having my hard-earned money to pay for people who cannot work because they have a disability, a mental illness or have to care for their sick family members. In fact, it's a nice way to make sadaqah.
BUT. I cannot stand that the money I worked hard to get goes to people who are LAZY and USELESS and don't even bother to go find a decent job and get money for their own use. Instead they use the money to buy cigarettes, drugs, booze and then become so good-for-nothing that no-one in their right mind would want to employ them. And these people rock up to the hospital (because it's free, if they went to a clinic they'd have to pay) drunk or recently overdosed or allegedly in pain because they want free medications.
Unfortunately I see a lot of these kind of people as patients. It just makes me seethe. How would you feel?
I have lived with LESS than that amount of money when I was a student. Yes it was tight but you won't die from starvation. You could still have a comfortable home and good food. You could still go out once in a while and have things you like. You can save up and buy things that you want or go places. We got an allowance but we had a "job" too. Our job was to study. If we didn't have enough money, we sold things, made things and sold them, get a casual job and lots of other ways.
So if someone is unemployed and getting easy allowance every fortnight, then what to they do all day? Able-bodied people just staying at home doing nothing...what do they do? Wallow in self pity with booze and cigarettes and smoke and lament about their pitiful life yet do nothing to improve that life. Then they become depressed, try to commit suicide, abuse their family/children, get assaulted during a drunk episode.
Save up for a training course for something, at least. Clean yourself up. Sober up. Volunteer. Study, read, learn. Improve yourself. The idle hands are the devil's hands. There are lots of work opportunities for everyone who wants it. It's just a matter of wanting it or not.
Indeed from all this I understand why Allah says He does not change those who do not change themselves.
Whenever I see people like that I always think of the story of Abdul Rahman ibn Auf. He was the richest man in Makkah. When he migrated to Madinah, he had nothing. He was in poverty. But what did he do? He looked for a business opportunity. He found that no one sold firewood at the market. So he went out in the heat to look for firewood to sell at the market. He was prosperous again in no time.
These days, people are allergic to hard work.
Precise
I feel like I'm climbing a mountain but the peak is still not in view.
I want to reach the top and envy the people who are already there. I envy them because they can now descend. It's easier downhill. Not too much pain. You move a little faster.
I feel frustrated that people who started the climb with me are higher up the mountain than me.
Sometimes I feel like I want to make camp at where I am and just take a break.
Sometimes I feel like I don't want to climb the mountain anymore, parachute down and climb a hill instead.
But I keep on going.
But I keep on going.
Woes and troubles
Alhamdulillah finally I get a day off. I am so exhausted physically and mentally. Plus I've had to put off a lot of things. Thankfully hubby did the laundry and tidied up the house on his SICK day off. Had a happy surprise when I got home. Thanks, dear!
Emergency is really not for me. Some people may thrive on it. Living on continuous adrenaline rush. But I cannot handle it. Maybe 1-2 days a week but not more than that. And I haven't even done the late shifts yet. And I, as an intern, don't even see the sick patients (Triage Category 1 & 2). (NB: ye ye everyone is sick but when we say sick, it means dying or could die).
Our emergency department is a mess. I mean, literally it's a mess. For the past week also, the hospital was full. So there weren't any beds upstairs on the ward. That meant even admitted patients had to spend their hospital stay in the emergency ward in trolleys because they couldn't be moved upstairs. So the newcomers presenting to emergency were not able to be seen because there was just no room. The really sick patients were stuck in trolleys in the corridor, on the ramps, at the ambulance entrance and just seen there!
Remember I posted earlier that I'm working in DMU (interim ward). I've done that for 2 weeks and last week I had a few days in the actual emergency department itself. The emergency department is divided into a few sections. The RESUS area where the sick patients go. The main area is called the FLOOR. And another area is called FASTRACK.
But I put myself in the fastrack area on one day. Fastrack is where patients are sent if they need a procedure done or we think it's not going to take long to manage them. They're broken bones, foreign body in eye/ears/limbs, grazes, lacerations etc. There's high turnover and most cases are simple. Patients come, get fixed, go home. The day I was in Fastrack was the best day I've ever had at work for 6 months. I actually enjoyed myself. Helped people. Felt satisfied.
Then other days I was on the floor. I didn't really like it. Lots of complicated patients. By complicated I mean they have 4-5 problems that need to be addressed. And all patients need to be discussed with the consultant on the floor and get approval for my management plan. That takes some time. Like yesterday I had to wait 2 hours just to talk to the consultant about my patient because every time I started talking to her, she had to answer her phone and address the problem on the phone.
I think I feel frustrated & angry because 60-70% of the time, the patients I see don't really have anything wrong with them. They're honestly - wimps who don't even try to help themselves first. Those who have pain (who've probably never had any pain in their life) come in or brought in by ambulance (!!!) complaining of "SEVERE" pain but when asked, didn't even bother to take even PANADOL. We give them Panadol and the pain goes away. What a waste of our time/resources. Even a waste of the patient's time having to wait for ages.
And some have "SEVERE" pain but do not behave like they are in severe pain. Did you know we can diagnose appendicitis just by looking at how people behave? People who truly have appendicitis would not be able to even walk properly, will wince when they cough or are moved. They look really sick. They do not easily walk into the department, jump on the bed, scream bloody murder & writhe around just for getting a blood test done (with a small needle, might I add).
Sorry this is such a long entry but I had to get it off my chest. I cannot wait for this rotation to end. I'm so tired of patients (!!!).
Emergency is really not for me. Some people may thrive on it. Living on continuous adrenaline rush. But I cannot handle it. Maybe 1-2 days a week but not more than that. And I haven't even done the late shifts yet. And I, as an intern, don't even see the sick patients (Triage Category 1 & 2). (NB: ye ye everyone is sick but when we say sick, it means dying or could die).
Our emergency department is a mess. I mean, literally it's a mess. For the past week also, the hospital was full. So there weren't any beds upstairs on the ward. That meant even admitted patients had to spend their hospital stay in the emergency ward in trolleys because they couldn't be moved upstairs. So the newcomers presenting to emergency were not able to be seen because there was just no room. The really sick patients were stuck in trolleys in the corridor, on the ramps, at the ambulance entrance and just seen there!
Remember I posted earlier that I'm working in DMU (interim ward). I've done that for 2 weeks and last week I had a few days in the actual emergency department itself. The emergency department is divided into a few sections. The RESUS area where the sick patients go. The main area is called the FLOOR. And another area is called FASTRACK.
But I put myself in the fastrack area on one day. Fastrack is where patients are sent if they need a procedure done or we think it's not going to take long to manage them. They're broken bones, foreign body in eye/ears/limbs, grazes, lacerations etc. There's high turnover and most cases are simple. Patients come, get fixed, go home. The day I was in Fastrack was the best day I've ever had at work for 6 months. I actually enjoyed myself. Helped people. Felt satisfied.
Then other days I was on the floor. I didn't really like it. Lots of complicated patients. By complicated I mean they have 4-5 problems that need to be addressed. And all patients need to be discussed with the consultant on the floor and get approval for my management plan. That takes some time. Like yesterday I had to wait 2 hours just to talk to the consultant about my patient because every time I started talking to her, she had to answer her phone and address the problem on the phone.
I think I feel frustrated & angry because 60-70% of the time, the patients I see don't really have anything wrong with them. They're honestly - wimps who don't even try to help themselves first. Those who have pain (who've probably never had any pain in their life) come in or brought in by ambulance (!!!) complaining of "SEVERE" pain but when asked, didn't even bother to take even PANADOL. We give them Panadol and the pain goes away. What a waste of our time/resources. Even a waste of the patient's time having to wait for ages.
And some have "SEVERE" pain but do not behave like they are in severe pain. Did you know we can diagnose appendicitis just by looking at how people behave? People who truly have appendicitis would not be able to even walk properly, will wince when they cough or are moved. They look really sick. They do not easily walk into the department, jump on the bed, scream bloody murder & writhe around just for getting a blood test done (with a small needle, might I add).
Sorry this is such a long entry but I had to get it off my chest. I cannot wait for this rotation to end. I'm so tired of patients (!!!).
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