(P.S.)

(Yes, that really was a blog post. From me. I KNOW!  I keep stressing over how far behind this blog is, and how much work I need to do to catch everything up & oh how long that's going to take & I think I'd just rather waste some more time on Facebook and Pinterest. lol But I've decided to liberate myself from that burden & just go forward from here. Maybe I'll start working on updates here and there as I try to get back into the habit of blogging; but I'm tired of the weight of that project keeping me from posting anything at all. So no more, I say! No more!)

Sunday lessons

This morning, I woke up grumpy. Like, murderously grumpy. The kids couldn't scratch their elbows without driving me crazy - so the process of getting everyone ready for church was deeply unenjoyable, to put it very nicely. 

Of course I wanted to believe that the children were just being so very naughty, and how could I possibly be expected to behave civilly to these monsters?? But, even a great pretender such as I couldn't ignore the reality at hand: I was the monster. :(

On a normal day, things would've continued to digress until my parenting had reached a deeply shameful state, and I simply longed for that day to end so a new & different one could begin. But, luckily for myself & all in our family, today is Sunday; and that meant we got to go to church meetings! Suffice it to say that it didn't take long before the spirit of that place (yes, in spite of dealing with 3 kids during Sacrament meeting & a very wiggly toddler for the rest of the meetings) worked on my heart & brought me back to a more loving and peaceful place. 

In Relief Society, we were asked to think about someone that we admire greatly, and why. Many people sprang to mind - I have an overabundance of people to look up to in my life - but suddenly I settled on the thought of my own children. 

These sweet children, who listen to my rantings and seemingly irrational demands all day long, who are constantly exposed to the full spectrum of my crazy, and yet who are at the ready with a hug or a kiss or a sweet smile at any point during the day. These children who can listen to me yell at them until they begin to cry, and then come directly to me for comfort. (That one always boggles me!!) These children who, on the worst of days, can still find reason to tell me with seemingly 100% sincerity, "You're the best mom ever!" How can they say that?? Have they been in a trance all day? Don't they see what a 3rd-rate mother I am?!

The answer is, no. No, they don't. These sweet little ones, who I am supposed to be teaching and nurturing, are my living breathing lesson in unconditional love. They see the real me in ways no one else does, and love me more purely and perfectly than anyone else. Pretty impressive, considering they can't even tie their own shoes. :)

So, Self, next time you find them to be unbearable and impossible... come on back here and give this a quick re-read. And then give them each a nice tight hug. 

Return of the Mac

Blogging.

*sigh* 


It has been almost 5 months since my last confession... I mean, blog post...  :)

What's happened to this place? My little corner of the blogosphere, once busy and bustling, has become a ghost town, with only a few rusty hubcaps and the occasional ragtag crew of tumbleweeds calling it home.

I used to consider myself a "blogger", it was a title I wore proudly. Tonight my relief society is holding an activity about "Blogging Basics", and I thought "well I don't need to go to that, I am a blogger." Except, it dawns on me... I'm not. Just as I can't call myself a runner if I don't start running more than once every 3 weeks - oops - I can't really call myself a blogger with my present track record.

But hey, exercising once every few weeks is better than nothing, right? And while I've clearly fallen off the blogging-wagon, occasional updates here and there are... well, they're something, at least.

So, update!

We are here in lovely Virginia enjoying life as our little family of five. I was prepared to sorely miss all our family and friends back in Utah, and we do; but I also hoped that perhaps this journey out on our own would simplify our day-to-day lives, allow us to draw closer together and help me improve upon my role as mother to our 3 sweet kiddos. 

And so far, it seems I was right in my hopes.  Our days are quite simple (perhaps in excess, as it may sometimes seem, haha), and this time spent together with mainly each other for company has certainly made our family stronger. And the quality of my parenting abilities? Well, that's a dance that has many steps; but I like to think that there's small, SMALL progress being made. :)

Emma has adjusted to all-day kindergarten quite well, and every day she seems to add about a year to her intellect and maturity. So by now I'm living with a 40-year old know-it-all who bounces off the walls from sun-up to sun-down. :) But man, is she beautiful... Beauty, brains, and confidence - adds up to a little girl who will one day be an unstoppable young woman!

Adam is in a bit of a transitional phase at the moment; he continues to have trouble dealing with the reality that he is a boy... and therefore, full of testosterone that causes him to do things like drop large trucks on his baby sister's head, scream for 20 minutes straight when his water isn't "ice-cold", and bang his own head against the wall when these actions bring him punishment. *sigh* But then, the tears and screaming subside, we have a hug and a kiss, say "I love you", and go back to parking his toy cars in perfectly straight lines. And honestly, when nothing is upsetting him, he is the sweetest & most endearing little boy on God's green earth. He got to sing in his first Mothers Day primary program last Sunday, with his handsome little face just barely clearing the pulpit. Oh yeah, I melted. :)

Lily is just progeny perfection!!! I know, it's not nice to give these mixed reviews of the other two and then clear Lily as being unequivocally flawless - but it's my party and I'll do whatever I darn well please. :) Actually, I'm more than aware that before long she will be 2 1/2 and on the receiving end of plenty of my rants; so I'm gonna carpe the heck outta this diem & enjoy this wonderful age to its fullest. She's entered the phase of learning 16 new things every day, and all the crawling/climbing/scooting around furniture/dumping things out of cupboards really wears her out by the end of the day. Which means... sleeping through the night! Finally! (Unfortunately, that means I have to go these massive chunks of time without seeing her - UNCOOL! But that's what my new video monitor is for... hehehehehe)

Okay, I can already feel a Lily-love-fest coming on strong, and I know y'all don't have all day to spend reading this; but perhaps just expect to see an entire Lily post sometime soon. Loaded to the eyeballs with pictures. Which I'm sure will be oh-so-very upsetting to many of you. ;)

FINE, you twisted my arm: here's a picture of Lily sleeping RIGHT NOW!

you're welcome, Amy. :)

Colby spends his days as a fearless soldier waging the war of labor disputes among the public employees of DC and the management organizations.... Yeah, that sentence really lost its juice somewhere along the way, sorry. *ahem* Colby is enjoying himself at his new post; it is worlds away from the pace and pressure of his job on the campaign, that's for sure! It left him with a little bit of what you might call "occupational whiplash", and that's taken time for him to adapt to. But hey, a job with a more relaxed atmosphere and greatly lowered time demands, nothing to shake a stick at! It's great! Plus, I like to think that simply having his wife around again is all he needs in the world. :) (stop your snickering, hubby, and just nod your head... that's right, good boy...)

And me? Well, after wringing all this writing outta myself tonight, I'm exhausted!! So, you don't really get much about me, which I'm sure is a monster letdown for you. It's okay, cry it out, let it all out, I'll wait... That's it dearie, that's better. Here's a tissue, your nose is all runny now. :)

Okay, that's really enough for tonight. I'm gonna finish watching the SYTYCD auditions (EEEEEEE!!!!! Season 10!!! Get ready for recaps!) and then I shall hit the hay. Except, I don't have any hay here. So I'll just be going to bed. I suggest you all do the same - if you've made if through this whole thing, you have to be pooped! 

Harmon Out.

Christmas Card Update

Merry Christmas from our humble kingdom!

Things have been quite hectic around the castle this year - where to begin??

Colby of course has quite the tale to tell at the end of 2012 - one that began at his job at the Dept. of Human Resource Management here in Utah, then whisked him off across the country to lend his talents to the Romney campaign in Boston, and then came to a somewhat disappointing but still satisfying end that brought him back home to Utah & his dear family, who were of course both happy and sad to see him returning home for good.

But wait! A surprise twist ending!! In the final hours of this already-packed year, a new job calls him away again just days before the end of 2012, this time to {{{drumroll}}}....

Washington D.C.!! Once I can get everything packed up and sent out, we will follow as well. It will be unspeakably hard leaving behind all our family & friends, that of course goes without saying. But, if I'm being honest... We're kindof East-Coasters at heart - and I'm kindof super excited. :)

As far as the other subjects of Harmondom: Emma has become quite a big girl this past year. It seems like every time I look at her, she's matured another year. She's just about the best big sister I've ever seen (most of the time, hehe), and she's become especially good at carting her baby sister around the house without any help from Mommy!  :) (Mommy is super-happy about that...) She is blazing her way through kindergarten, and she's become our official book-reader anytime the kiddos want a story. However, I do think that if she gets any more beautiful, I'm going to seriously have to consider a full-perimeter fence & guard dogs to keep the boys away... ;) Just the other day she was standing with a boy in her class when we picked her up from school; when I asked her about him later, she replied "Oh that's Ian. He's a guy in my class." Ahem. A GUY in her class?? "Yeah, he's a guy in my class. We're just a pair." Dear heavens, we're in trouble.

Adam - where to begin about Adam?? To put it simply... here, this will do the job better. I'd like to introduce you to Adam:

Yeah.

Let's not forget that by day, dear ole' Hulkie here is a mild-mannered, respectable, bright young man who loves Oreos, racing, and anything with wheels. Who somehow learned all his letters without any assistance from his parents, and has successfully made the transition into big-boy undies! This young man is undoubtedly the most adorable, hilarious, loving, precious little boy currently walking this earth.

But, put the wrong shoes on him... give him 4 chicken nuggets instead of 3... try to give him a kiss when he wants a hug instead... and, well, get ready to butt heads with the big raging green guy. :) I mean, he's still adorable; but it's mitigated by the fact that he's beating on you with his tiny little fists.

And now we come to little miss Lily. I have a picture for this one too.

:)

You know that part in the new Charlie & the Chocolate Factory, when Willy Wonka is going down the line of kids kinda summing them each up, all their nasty little habits & whatnot? And then he gets to Charlie. He looks at Charlie, and he just says, "Well, you're just happy to be here, aren't ya?"

That's my Lily-Belle. She's just happy to be here. Whether she's had a nice nap or she's tired, whether she's hot or cold, whether it's calm or rowdy, whether her tummy's empty or full - she's always just happy to be here. She's gorgeous, giggly, tall & skinny, wide-eyed, wondrous, and pure heaven. The way I figure it, she's my gift for letting Colby go off for 6 months to live his dreams. She's my gift, and I get to keep her, always.

Which leaves me in the midst of all the rest of this, just lil' ole me. Getting a little exercise here, a little sleep there, trying to keep up on my couponing & failing to keep up on my blogging. :) My house is sometimes clean, my children are occasionally bathed, my hair is seldom styled. But my body is healthy, my family is happy, and my heart is full - especially at this time of year, when we can reflect on everything we've been given this past year, and give a few gifts of our own to those we love most.

If you're reading this, then you must really love us & you're definitely one of those we love most. This season, we wish you joy & happiness as we step back from life to gaze upward at the night stars; watching for a red bolt to go soaring across the skyline; watching for those beautiful snowflakes to drift peacefully down to earth; watching for an echo, a remnant of that one star from long ago, that brought such good tidings of such very great joy. Of all gifts, I'm most thankful for that gift. I'm most overwhelmed, most overjoyed - most awed & shamed & humbled by that gift. I thank my Father in Heaven for that new star, that new sun: His Son, the light of the world. 

Merry Christmas to you all, and a Happy New Year!!

Little Miss Lily!

I'm finally taking a few moments to post our latest & greatest news - the birth of Lily Joan! It's quite a story, so hang onto your seats -

Colby flew in on Monday the 11th, and we headed in Tuesday morning to be induced. (Rather, I headed in at 6 am. to get started on the antibiotics for the Group B Strep virus that I always test positive for - Colby came a little later.) The doctor broke my water at 10:30, with the hopes that that alone would get things moving along; but by 12:40 I'd only had mild, semi-regular contractions going, and the nurse felt we should try just a little "whiff" of Pitocin to help get things going a little better.

Well, a whiff was all it took! She started 2mg/minute, and within 30 seconds I started into hard contractions that stacked one on top of the other for a total of 8 minutes! So, she decreased the Pitocin to 1mg/min. :) About 10 minutes later she decreased it by half again, but there was no turning back by then - I was deep into fast, hard labor.

We called for the epidural man and he began to prep me (which included 10 minutes of telling me all about the risks of this procedure that I'd had twice already), but just as I was curled up on my side getting ready for relief, I felt the need to inform the nurse that I was feeling MAJOR pressure down under - and upon checking me, she found that I had progressed from 6cm to 10cm in about 20 minutes & was ready for delivery immediately. Which for me simply translated to, "You're not getting an epidural."  **sob!!**

No turning back now, however - just a few minutes of waiting for the doctor to arrive, one giant push of all the energy I had left in me, and Miss Lily Joan was born! She measured at 6 lbs. 14 oz., and 18 1/2" long - perfect in every way! I barely had the energy to hold her as they handed her to me, but her sweet little face was everything I'd imagined.

Struggling to keep my eyes open to see my new baby girl

2 days old, getting ready to go home

Fast forward to the following Sunday: I'd been feeling horrid all weekend, and even went to the ER on Friday night with no real definitive answer other then being very dehydrated. I continued feeling generally crappy, and by Sunday I was laid out with severe chills & other flu-like symptoms, sharp uterine pains, and a temp of 101.5 & climbing - so back to the ER we went! They confirmed what I was already suspecting: I had developed a postpartum uterine infection. (Which was a little strange since I didn't fit any of the risk factors for it. But, whatever.)

My 103-degree fever and shooting abdominal pains earned me a dose of morphine (AHHHH) and a bed back in the Women's Pavillion for the next 4 days! During that time, I would also develop a case of thrush in my mouth from the heavy antibiotics used to fight the infection, and some major shortness of breath that a CT scan revealed to be a pleural effusion. (I'd never even heard of that before.) Not to mention, a severe case of I'm-sick-of-the-hospital-blues. :(  Plus, I spent that whole time pumping & dumping my milk, since the antibiotics in my system would likely upset Lily's tummy. Whoever said "Don't cry over spilled milk" did NOT have this scenario in mind; every dump down the drain made me wanna weep.

I've now been out a week, and I can happily report that I'm feeling basically normal again! Well, other than the postpartum depression that I always get to deal with after childbirth. Seriously - what a terrible idea to give already overwhelmed & under-rested mothers a bout of depression to remove the happiness from this happiest of situations, and leave them feeling sullen & gray in world full of color and light. When I get the chance, that's one of the big "Why's?" I'm presenting to God.

But I digress - after all of that, I'm left with my prize for my troubles & suffering... this most beautiful and precious little bundle who is only getting sweeter by the day! She is dearly beloved by her mother and father, sister and brother, and so many family members who filled in for Mommy while I was otherwise occupied. :) We only wish our little family could be more complete right now, but we will be again before long.

Those happy faces - what more could a girl want??

Welcome to the Harmon Family, Lily-Bell!
We hope you'll like us as much as we like you!

10 years - is that all??

Let me preface this entire post with a clear disclaimer: I am not in an entirely reasonable state of mind right now. I'm what one might call "moderately emotional", if one were predisposed towards huge understatements.

Colby left today. Which puts me in a pickle - a pickle because of the 2 wild demons that I'm left to care for; because of the undoubtedly adorable & entirely dependent little bundle that's headed my way in a matter of weeks; because of the entire household that I'm left to run on my own.

But mostly, MOSTLY, because after over 10 years together, I'm not entirely sure who I am without him. Many people might describe this sort of thing as losing half of themselves, but I'm certain I don't have nearly that much left remaining.

So, there's my pickle.  Never been a huge fan of pickles in general.

I'm making this all sound very gut-wrenching and agonizing, I know - when really, I have complete confirmation in my heart & soul that this will all work out not for our good, or for the better, but for the BEST! I have more sources of help than I know what to do with, it's truly an embarrassment of riches. I have no doubt that when all is said and done, I will look back on this time, and wonder how this small sacrifice was sufficient payment for all the immeasurable blessings we received in return.

BUT. But...  It's 9:46 on my first night without Colby; and while today went okay - make that okay - without him, I'm all-too painfully aware that I have nearly 200 days left & the odds are good that a fair percentage of that will not receive the same report. If that isn't a perfect recipe for wallowing, I just don't know what is. So, wallow I shall - 'cause sometimes a little wallowing is good for the soul. I'm sure I've read that somewhere...

Which brings me to: the catchup post about our 10th anniversary!! In case I haven't already bored you to tears with my weepy patheticism, here's a bunch of pictures of us, with zero cute kiddies, to really push you over the edge. :)

For something special to do for our 10th, we found a great deal on a lovely little lodge just outside Zions National Park. I'd never been there before, which is crazy! I was so glad we decided to head down there, it is some mighty gorgeous scenery down there. We are definitely looking forward to heading down there with the whole family sometime and showing the kids the amazing natural wonders.

So, here's a bunch of pictures with my rambling captions that are sure to drive your mouse up to that little "X" in the corner. :)

**Next disclaimer - after spending about 2 hours on this post, I was at the end, finishing off the semi-poetic declaration of love for my sweetheart full of all the things that I should tell him everyday but never really do (no, I'm actually not kidding at all) -- and Blogger glitched & lost about 2/3rds of the post. Yeah. So, I'm just gonna get the pictures back on, get this posted, and put myself to bed. Let's end this day, already.**

They had these signs all over (we were there in Feb., after all); but we were actually encouraged by the overall message: "Watch out for ice - but if you hit a patch, don't forget to go down in style, with JAZZ HANDS!"

Heading up the Angels Landing trail

Walter's Wiggles, from the bottom

Made it to the top of the Wiggles

We opted out of the final leg to the peak of Angels Landing, for a few reasons: me pregnant, me in heeled shoes, the icy conditions of the "path", and what was that other reason.... Oh yeah, the disturbing number of people that have DIED climbing it. I'm quite satisfied with the view we got from this spot. :)

Our all-too-brief stop at Kolob Canyon on the way home - seriously gotta go back there sometime, the views were beyond breathtaking!!!

Happy Anniversary, love. Miss you. 

Sometime I'll try to tell you all the things that Blogger decided it didn't want me to tell you. 

Breaking News!

THIS JUST IN:

We're (just about) all ready for little Lily; thanks to Grandpa Kent & Aunt Amy for this beautiful minty-fresh transformation!

We've got a certain big boy that has ditched the baby bed for this:

"Grandma Jane bought me my new Cars bed!"

Aaaaaand... well, the last one, I don't really wanna publish it because that's like acknowledging that it is really happening, and maybe if I don't then it won't. :( But, then I'd have to recite to myself the lecture that Emma gets daily about accepting what is & moving forward, blah blah...  SO! Let's just rip this BandAid & get it over with!!

Colby has been offered a job in Boston & in 2 weeks is there, ALONE, for the next 6 months.

(deep breath, deep breath... find my happy place... take a quick "brown paper sack" break...)

*now, where'd that official statement go that I've been drafting.... ah, here it is - ahem:*

This is an amazing opportunity for both Colby and our family. We feel so blessed to be involved in this unique and important part of history, and this organization is equally lucky to be gaining such a hard-working and qualified team member. We look forward to this exciting period of challenge & growth, and would like to thank everyone in advance for all the help extended to us by both friends and family. Bon voyage, Colby - our hearts go to Boston with you & we know you will be everything they're looking for & much more!

_____________________________________________________

(Unofficially & off the record... this BLOWS. Much more on that will surely follow.)

Catchup #7: Las Vegas trip

For her 90th birthday celebration in January, Colby's Grandma Vila declared that she wanted to go to Vegas, because she wanted to "see what stays in Vegas." Haha! What a great lady! Well no complaints here, we're always happy to head down there.

Our first night there we decided to go crazy & have dinner at Serendipity - mainly since we wanted to go there for dessert, and figured we should set a good example for the kids and eat dinner food first. :) Adam insisted on having chicken pot pie once he heard me read it off the menu - the dang thing was big as his head, and twice as delicious! Sooo good! But nothing could top my Triple Decker Grilled Cheese with Tomato Soup... mmmm..... I just sat here staring at the wall & drooling for like 4 minutes just thinking about it. *sigh*

We did plenty of fountain watching at the Bellagio, and Emma and I even got to "experience" the fountains! (see: standing front and center while the sky-high jets are combined with 45 MPH winds...) And, although Adam got a bit intimidated by them in person, when he saw them from the car he exclaimed, "Wow, that's Gi-NOR-mous dancing water!!" Yes it is, Adam, yes it is.

I didn't get a ton of pictures, but here's a few fun ones:

the M&M racecar at M&M World

Posing with the giant freaky polar bear that really has nothing to do with soda.

Adam was pretty leery of this suspicious beast - he kept his trusty M&M Saber at the ready.

We were lucky enough to spend an afternoon with BFF Julie & her adorable fam!

Emma, Bridger, Porter & Abi in the back

On our way out of town we did make a stop at the Las Vegas temple, and we got lucky that there was a guard there on a Sunday morning that unlocked the gates for us and let us walk around for a while. So I did get plenty of pictures there!

the infamous Temple Monster

(do I post too many pictures of Adam?)

"Mom, this temple rocks!" There, now it's been said & I don't have to
listen to Colby make that joke for years to come.

Can I keep 'em?? Yay!!