That girl is like a sunburn I would like to save.

You're a summer time hottie with her socks in the air
Screaming I don't care baby, I don't care

I'm all Third Eye Blind on repeat and

dressing up as random things for

er, entertaining days out recently.

[Ad Planet parties are craaaazyyy.]

The bestie finally got back from Taiwan,

so the ex-roxygal and I met up

with her for shopping for Vans and

talking about sex loudly in

highly populated areas of shopping centres.

Ahhhh, the truth of my youth.

[I am very pleased with my

yellow Harajuku Lovers tee.]

It's the last day of 2007 and I'm

already like ugh, take your 2008 away.

I feel so pathetic, but like, if it doesn't

come with lovely new people, a school/course of choice,

a nice boy, the same old BUT, BABY!!/Ccyanide,

and a generous helping of skinny days, high self-esteem,

a handbook on holding proper conversations with strangers,

and chocolate?

I DON'T WANT IT.

I'll try to get some exercise in tomorrow,

catch the 2.50 p.m showing of Across the Universe,

and dance/jump on the bubblewrap with Clara

at midnight, playing our kazoos loudly.

*

A hazy memory, a bright day, your first impression?

Drinks in bottles, painted nails, carefully labelled

home-made mixtapes.

Your unpretentious laugh over their polite smiles.

That look, with a swirling guitar soundtrack backing us up.

Early mornings, late nights, background noise.

Buttons, and bags, and books.

Cause you don't think like them.

Vans and converse falling apart.

Constant motion, and then sitting on the

ground watching the world pass us by.

I close my eyes and I feel you beside me,

and my eyes smile behind those red sunnies.

And oh god, those technicolor eyes.

When the radio's up your face fades away,
flicker flicker dim and fade to black.

[Google is so kickass.]

*

We'll dance and rock back & forth,

cause we're unstable that way.

We'll sing and the wind will whip

around us, our voices lost to

the night air.

We'll plop on the ground giggling,

coaxing you down with us.

Come on.

It's nights like those.

Morning didn't come screaming
into existance like it usually does.
My head was still full of
Clara whining for us to take...
an "adventure" in the
van with bryant,
with a calm silence,
with the breeze and our words.

"I can't believe the year is ending."

I don't want any of this to go away.

But we bleed like no one else.

I hate this drama that is constantly being

injected into our otherwise boring, mundane lives.

I can't stand this mediocrity.

Despite our valiant attempts at being

everything unlike them, I see us falling

victims to whatever we're trying to escape.

Either way.

Resistance is futile.

I keep telling myself we'll escape,

we will end up okay.

And I won't always be falling asleep

to what is no longer our song, it's just

one last thing I need to shake.

I won't go to bed at god-awful hours,

feeling strangely alone and wishing for a

caffeine/nicotine/chocolate fix, so I can instead

obsess about the excess weight I've been

lugging around these few days.

You won't look so...caught up in

whatever it is you are caught up in.

You look so.

Pensive?

Strangely sad, the exact same way I was,

the sadness I thought i'd never get around.

It just settles on you, and

you get used to it, right?

It either gets better or gets worse.

Sometimes I see you laughing and wonder how

that could be the same person.

Or, you know, I COULD be reading

TOO MUCH into everything.

I wonder if our situation were any different,

would we still have gravitated to each other?

Through crowded canteens, late night rooftops,

or a mess of sweaty bodies in a mosh pit.

We'd find us, I know we would.

My back aches and my eyes sting

and I should sleep but

I won't just yet.

Arresting you for being in love.

It's pleasant enough conversation, and not

that many awkward silences.

Maybe even none of those.

It's not even practiced, or whatever now.

It's a genuine interest and

genuine words.

It's just that, at moments like those

I feel my skin tingle

or my breath hitch a bit and think

maybe, things could be different.

I'm not sure if I even

want it to be that way.

But I get this urge to just say something.

Would you just listen?

It's kind of hard to read your

silences and your expressions sometimes.

Say goodnight, sleep alone.

Picture day smiles and day old clothes.

*

That freeze-frame crash.

In thirty, forty years who'd believe you?

Your starless eyes remain.

So that's that.

And I'm being nice, stop gawking.

I love the jumpers,

even though some have this

'senior-junior' complex that

they just can't shake.

*

Go ahead, drink a cyanide shot, on me.

*

And I was so fucking excited up until

the moment I realised that I

won't be in Singapore.

Fuck.

"Look at you, you motherfuckers, you're beautiful."

No hesitation, no delay
You come on just like special K
Just like I swallowed half my stash
I never ever want to crash

" I don't give a shit how much fun you're having,

if you see somebody fall down,

you pick them the fuck up, alright?"

I love Gerard, he's looking happily deranged again

with his mess of black hair, it's awesome.
The My Chem boys have gone from

just winging it, full rock out with no plan

to insane blow-your-mind theatrical shit

and god, it was just the most beautiful thing.

After Helena, Gerard went something like

"Did you see that? That is what

makes us want to play rock and roll.

That is why you should all

go out and start a band."

And I just love them with all my heart.

These guys who played to like,

eight people in a basment when

they were starting out to

playing to kids from all over

to fucking sold out concerts.

Everything was just crazy,

just seeing Mikey, Gerard, FRANKIE, Ray

and thinking about how Bob should be here

made my year, or however
long I've been waiting to see them play.

I won't say they saved me,

nothing as dramatic as that,
but they gave me music to love,
and they kept my head on

straight this whole time.

<3

Attended the show with this lovely girl here.
*

And did you see the blown-up condoms

being tossed around the crowd

before the show?

Well, YEAH, courtesy of Kevin and Darooo.

Wah lao, they are such fuckers

and were damn mean to me!

They didn't let me off the bus

OR out from Macs to

go home.

Eeevillll.

*

I wonder what the kids are doing.

Foreign Language (Doo Doo Doo Doo)

Chase this light. says:
(eh those things are like fucking maggots lah)
Chase this light. says:
the "worms"
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
HAHAHAH
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
will you eat ?
Chase this light. says:
er, no. i kept those as a science project in primary school.
Chase this light. says:
not cool to eat
Chase this light. says:
actually, no. I kept mealworms
Chase this light. says:
hmm
Chase this light. says:
and they became beetles
Chase this light. says:
(:
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
EEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Chase this light. says:
BETTER THAN THOSE THINGS
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
they are larvae ! can turn into
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
actually i dont know what larvae turn into

*
Chase this light. says:
you know, there's this car alarm that has been going off for two hours
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
har you really wont eat ah
Chase this light. says:
i'm going crazy
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
i wanted to bring on sat when we have tea with power rangers then i offer them worms
Chase this light. says:
CAR ALARM *tears hair out* NO WORMS
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
HAHAHA
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
glues hair back
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
pats hair in place
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
combs hair
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
eats comb
Chase this light. says:
owwww
Chase this light. says:
my tou fa
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
HAHAHAHAHA
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
why you tou fa !
Chase this light. says:
hahaha why cannot
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
you suddenly cheena ah
Chase this light. says:
no you tou fu
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
i is be wo niu
Chase this light. says:
no no
Chase this light. says:
i is be laugh
Chase this light. says:
my mother is be call police

*
Chase this light. says:
haha you hello us
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
yes i miss you all
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
i will give you all worms
Chase this light. says:
no no no
Chase this light. says:
no worms
Chase this light. says:
i have enough
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
WORMS !
Chase this light. says:
i miss you too, you tou fu
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
WORMS !
Chase this light. says:
no tou fu
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
WORMS !
Chase this light. says:
HAHA
Chase this light. says:
omg i feel like putting that on my blog
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
WORMS !
Chase this light. says:
*stares
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
WORMS !
Chase this light. says:
I is be beatbeat
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
wriggle
Chase this light. says:
*stares. *pokes
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
wriggles
Chase this light. says:
*giggles *puts in container with dog. *worm and dog fight
Chase this light. says:
*god is
Chase this light. says:
EH
Chase this light. says:
*dog
Chase this light. says:
ahhahaha
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
HAHAHAH
Chase this light. says:
*dog is VICTORIOUS
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
worm dies
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
worm juice spatters on taina
Chase this light. says:
worm is already be dead
Chase this light. says:
and dried
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
if you believe in it
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
it will come alive
Chase this light. says:
I believe. that it is. dead and dried
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
then the almighty worm god shall forsake you
Chase this light. says:
thank goodness
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
it shall bless its wormy goodness on more deserving people
Chase this light. says:
thank goodness
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
YOU DONT WANT WORMY GOODNESS !
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
I BRING BACK WORMY GOODNESS IN CONTAINER ALL THE WAY FROM CITY HALL FOR YOU !
Chase this light. says:
you is be wormgirl. you is be
Chase this light. says:
yuck
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
HAHAHAHAHA
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
I IS BE WORM GIRL!
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
YAY
Chase this light. says:
and you is be yuck.
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
i is be delightful
Chase this light. says:
i is be delighted
Chase this light. says:
i is be upset too. the car is still shouting
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
call cops !
That is why i want a coin operated boy says:
i feel like eating another worm
Chase this light. says:
it'll all go to your thighs

So tick tock tick tock

Breathe in stop

Watch the clock

Count your toes

To make sure they're there

Clench your teeth

Tug your hair

Just three more hours

You're almost there

Forty-two swivels in

your swivel-ly chair

Slap on that lip balm

Put on those shades

Step out into the dying sunlight

My dear, you are gonna be made.

*

Mmm not taking my newly-found status in the

world of the employed very well.

Telemarketing to companies in the UK,

making envelope labels, and researching on

conferences regarding Vitamins and Supplements,

from nine to six.

Not my kind of thing you know?

I didn't want to let my aunt down,

but after one day I was like...I'm done.

But I guess I'm not cause I gave her a call and

she convinced me to stay for a week at least.

Today, however, she talked to like,

the creative director next door and...

I'm signed up for coming in about three days a week,

to learn copywriting and stuff!

Okay one up I guess.

I'll just suck it up and do my best!

(I foresee doing dumb things and having

all the creative department people going...what the.)

I can't believe I have work

again in a couple of hours.

I mean, what happened to

bumming around at all hours of the day?

Oceans and Past Lives.

I was going through my stuff, and I found these

pictures from last year, and god,

I like them so much.

Andre and I in San Fran.

The horrible end to the year

in a lovely place,

that I really didn't like to be at

cause all I wanted to be

was home.

And then you have now.

Seriously, we are a lovely

shade of "retarded-and-shameless"

blend.

Starting work at my aunt's office

with this silly boy

tomorrow.

I foresee many scoldings from the boss

and sneaking away for

coffee breaks and retail therapy

with my partner in crime.

Nevermind, if I kena

then Andre also kena!

*

We have tons of pictures

in similar poses

but we don't tire

of the flashes

and smiles.

[But I don't have access to

most of them right

now cause my

computer

is DOWN.

WORK, goddamn it!]

Bry is in the Top 10

and all is well,

except for the fact

that we cannot attend

the finals

because it is a ticketed

event due to some

stupid chinese boyband!

*cough5566cough*

*

MCR in a couple of days!

Yay!

And I'm buying my ticket later!

Yay!

Okay now hush with

your cheering and frivolity

and try to find somebody

to go with you!

*

I like late night phone calls with

Clara Lock.

Maybe I'll never be

truly happy,

you know?

I don't know what I want.

A is for Accident.

I was checking out the SAT stuff and

I'm kinda bummed out cause basically everything

I learnt in E/A math for the O levels will be

tested in the math portion.

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

And I've forgotten everything, unsurprisingly.

*

Long train rides with Bryant Koh (Bossy Kangaroo/ BIG KOK)

from Choa Chu Kang to Pasir Ris and back

to meet our favourite super hero.

My god, it was just.

Ow, my head.

*

God I can't take it anymore.

I want to say something but it's probably

nothing so it's so not a good idea.

BAD BAD BAD.

Can I just put it down as just being

a little lonely -

You know, that two a.m "syndrome".

*

And I don't know how I feel about

Chase This Light by

Jimmy Eat World yet.

Because nothing is ever the same

as the first, you know?

*

Oh, take it all back, take the first

the last and only.

Oh, take it all back, take it all back

Everything you showed me.

Oh, this must be how

it feels when the feeling goes

*

Happy Birthday Mommy.

"You don't know me, I'm a bloody rock god!"

QUESTION:

SHOULD I GET A

BORDER OR RANDOM DESIGN

AROUND THE 42?

- Kevvvvster!

*

-My chapalang kids
*

I'm watching Miami Ink and I feel
rather disappointed with what I've got right now, but it's alright.

One day I'll take a trip down to

The Shop and get some ink done there,

and I'll be complete.

[I already know what I want next,

but that I would save for my eighteenth

cause maybe I want to
choose another place.

And gotta be legal and all.]

My Ultimate Answer is a little off-centre,

but that's okay, cause so am I.

*
Met up with Kevin Schwarz, after like ages.

Got up to our usual stupid nonsense,

and he was an utter embarrassment too.

Hung out at the esplanade and

laughed at Mats,

built little pebble towers

and actually managed to

get something serious out of him.

He also greeted me with a

Charlie [from LOST] action figure.

Omg, I love.

He says three things:

"You all everybody,

you all everybody!"

"You don't know me,

I'm a bloody rock god!"

-which I now use as the

message alert on my phone.

and

"Guys...where are we?"

Stop by my room and PRESS THE BUTTON!

: D

Thanks Kev <3

*

AND two full days of running around

with Clara, Bryant, Shiang Nee

[and Eva today].

Shiang Nee met me

for our aimless afternoon.

We went to

Acid Crue but I was

scared of the people,

despite the counter boy's

hawtness [and his

uncanny resemblence to

Shiang Nee's ex-neighbour].

So to Queensway,

where I was greeted like

a long lost daughter!

["Eh! ROBOT right!"]

Or... like if I had a

cheekopek uncle or something,

hahaha.

I love the silly people there.

Bry had to do some

stupid beatboxing two day

shindig,

a total waste of time

BUT it paid,

so whatever.

We journey-ed to

the ends of the earth to

run 2.4 km early

in the day

and later watch B*** be

the b*** Power Ranger at IMM.

[Guess who?]

Beat has a pet caterpillar

and I named it Dog.

*

As we speed down the highways

of Singapore in Bry's van

late at night,

the windows down,

our hair getting in our faces

and us randomly jostling each other

as we sing/scream our

fucking hearts out,

I get so scared I'll lose them.

To the army, to school,

to boyfriends/girlfriends,

to death,

to things that I can't control,

can't stop.

I think : no more esplanade,

no more late nights,

no more barcardi breezers/mixed drinks courtesy

of Clara/Beat/etc,

no more pondering life and death,

no more talking about sex,

no more singing,

no more gigs,

no more, like, living.

Without them, I'll just waste away.

And there'll be nobody to

steal the fucking urn at

the fucking wake.

Drive me to the beach,

cause you know I

want it that way.

I love you all,

so much.

You bunch of denerner

stupid fuckers.

I LOVE YOU.

I is be nothing

if I is be without you.

*

Sleepover with said people tonight,

at my place.

DVDs, drinks,

blow-up beds,

mixtapes and talking.

*

And I really like this,

despite how sad it makes me.