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©Glamouresque. |
Monday, November 23, 2009
screwed up you can't blame nobody except yourself for all the decision you've made no one force you to walk this road behind you, you did. you're your own disaster. you don't even know who you are no vision no dreams because of what you choose, you're paying the price of allowing yourself to become a piece of trash! you allowed ur heart to be hardened. you allow bad things to happen you allow everything you know tht's gonna destroy you happen to your fucking life. who to blame now? Y.O.U.R.S.E.L.F. maybe you should just leave this world for good. you're pretty much done here when you feel like a trash, you feel like dieing. God is so not interested in meeting my needs, i wish needs never exist. so tht i'll stop needing in this screwed up life. Friday, November 20, 2009
On this friday i just made a huge mistake at work, it's kinda dumb because i actually threw away the post it reminder before my eyes in the morning, but it's too late to do anything now.. arrggghhh, of all days friday.. i rather be the one getting scolded but i just sabo-ed my college... tht kinda feeling sucks i tell ya.. vanessa chan yi wen! please do not do this again you just added more salt and pepper to his already very bad friday can you stop making mistakes for once and switch on your brains?! geeess... I FEEL HORRIBLE!!!!!! it like a hangover! right, no link to that but i cant think of any thing worse then a hangover!! ai yo!!!! i'm such a dead meat once my boss finds out abt it, OH MY FREAKING FREAKING GOOSH! Addition entry... just came back from movie with lin/jh/joanne and eddie:) we caught ranging phoenix, pretty cool flick.. i love fighting movie! anyway on our way back, the music in the car trigger some thoughts i had about clubbing. There could only be one reason tht attracts pple to clubs these days 1. we can forget of who you really are when we're tipsy. enjoy great music blasting in ur ears, and have fun dancing away without thinking how others would think or look at you. you can never find people who are happy with their lives in da club because if they were, then they'll not be found clubbing.  clubs are for people who simply wants to let go of themselves because they could no longer accept who they really are as a person. as far as i'm concern this is my perspective, my own opinion. i've grown tired of clubbing, but nevertheless i still yearn for it. esp when i'm feeling sucky, immediately the thought of hitting the club lights on.. i think i was being nice to call my college which i didn't mean to sabo he freaking attitude-ed me like no body's business. i couldn't be bothered feeling guilty since he stinks so badly. i make mistakes, don't you? if sorry is not enough then there's nothing i can do. Monday, November 16, 2009
It was indeed an eventful week! Friday Linda’s bdae celebration part 1 it was like amazing race! Met up with joanne @ bugis after work to shop for lin’s present from another group of peeps, met up with the rest at ecp for dinner, for goodness sake it was RAINING! Nevertheless we still enjoyed all the good food and blessed with hazel nut milk tea from koi! Thanks lin! :D Bought her a pair of shoes she liked from rock star, shared amg the couple and myself I hope you like and will wear it babe! After which, drinking session :S ( I :x alcohol) At Resort, located on top of MacDonald at east coast park, I think the band’s good, they sound good at such a big hall too, it was just nice… once again I was thrown into another side of night life, lots of thoughts ect… lin was DEAD DRUNK! Hahaha.. I can’t remember how many times she puke that night, and yes I hate pple who only know how to open their mouth but don’t know how to lend a helping hand. They should just shut up. After sending lin home I was stuck at her house! she just sway her way to her sofa and fell aslp like a log!!!! i was like.. my goodness!! can you at least wash up or something? but on the other hand, when you're dead drunk u dun have the energy to do it... i tried to clean her mouth but her hair is so irritatting! so long! all tangled together uber hard to clean! i gave up! being such a monkey I forgot to bring my keys out!!! It was so bad because I was duper duper dope TIRED and I wanna bath so badly!!! Finally I returned home at 6.15am thinking tht mom’s gonna be awake but thank God she was awake at 6.30!!! HORRAY Rushed off to wash up and poof to lala land conclusion>It was a night of thoughts, struggles and I was just in my own world tht night man.. Saturday My cell phone + house phone all went off even before my alarm clock did! Was up less then 4hrs of sleep, bom! Lin bdae celebration part 2 Lunch with jh/ek/kim @ sushi tei taka, presented her with the gifts!! A flora print dress and her camera pouch! was kinda upset with the dress la, cause the person who sew it didn’t do a good job man, it looks fine but actually it doesn’t fit at all! Nevertheless Ima glad she loves the camera pouch!:) The bill from sushi tei was surprisingly cheap! $20per pac? For like 5 of us even when we ordered so much! Good meal, great companion!:D After which we all went off our own way, was supposed to accompany lin for her party @ st james but it was called off because my body failed me! was feeling so weak, feverish. . like I’m going to faint and die anytime soon, cabbed back home coma from 7.30pm-1.30pm the next day.. it’s a record! Hahaha Sunday Lin bdae celebration part 3(Acutal Day) Met up with jing hui, enqi and lin ard 9ish, drove to air port for popye! Then to cini, initially we wanted to catch 2012 but the only tickets available is only going to screen at freaking 2am!!! Being such stubborn grp of pple we decided to move over to the cathay… but they’re close! Still don’t wanna give up? We went to ps… the gates were all closed!!! T_T Jh suggested starbucks @ yish since it’s 24hrs, chillax till ard 2plus? Rush back home wash up and sleep! Apparently my body doesn’t wanna rest last night, after struggling to sleep for some good 1/half hour I decided to drug myself to sleep.. haha.. I drank 20ml of cough mixture with extra dosage and poof! I’m off to lala land Ok, I don’t think this is something good to learn, but I had to do it because there’s work today. Pray hard tht I don’t have to do the same thing tonight!!! BYE! Friday, November 13, 2009
Today marks the 7th month at work Whoo hoo! Pat myself at the back! : ) Okays, maybe I don’t need that but this is one I’ve stayed longest so far Learnt many things here and yes grow as a person as well. I just changed my twitter home page! Followed a few more people ect. . . Read through tweets and it’s all cool, twitter connects me w pple I hardly see but meant a lot to me, and I love reading tweets:) Ahh… can’t wait to get off from work right now esp when it’s Friday! Was just looking out of my office window (it’s still raining! T_T) Rainy days trigger deep thoughts….. This morning I was having breakfast with my mom at the market nearby our home I love spending quality time like these with love ones, although waking up is not exactly a very exciting thing to do.. but it’s worth it lah! My trail of thoughts right now is allova the place Allow me to be allova the place here yeah… Christmas is coming! Did I mention tht the lights in town are so beautiful? I love it! And the fat santa? I think when I’m really full I looked like his tummy! HAHA!:D I bet this yr’s Christmas is gonna be all different from all the previous yrs I’m thinking if I should still write Christmas cards … After all pple do chuck them one side after reading only idiots like me keep Em like gold… ahh! Okays, it’s like why shuld I bother writing if you wouldn’t appreciate right… like oh, it’s just another card. Family and friends meant a lot to me lah, I’m very sensitive to this issue because it meant a lot, it kills me like mad when they forget impt dates like birthdays It’s like u wouldn’t forget our spouse birthday right? Shit! This is a freaking small issue! Right! Ima not going to emo over some tiny issue like Christmas cards! We’ll see how it goes this year, really really really hope tht it’ll be a good one(cross finger) it MUST be! I hope there’s still Christmas dinner at anx’s crib! J And church… I’m alittle numb to the word church right now, pls forgive me Gosh, next week I’m on hospi... yes, I have a lot thoughts and doubts.. BUT I’m not giving a 2nd thought abt em… I’ll leave those doubts after I’ve served and given my best That’s all I have for you for today’s entry… I need some INSPIRATION!!! And MOTIVATION!! (pulls hair) Thursday, November 12, 2009
i hate migraine!!! it's the worst dam thing tht ever exist and yes flu! i hate them! wednesday... ladies night migraine spoil it all, left for home early so tht i could rest up enough for work today, but it was all crappy this morning thus i decided to go on mc smsed my superior, then went back to coma... woke up and checked on my phone, 5 miss calls 6text msgs to me tht's alot of miss calls! most of em form the office, call me irresponsible but i just didn't want to return their calls. . . kinda like i just wanna be left out of trouble ya see.. 1st thing i did after waking up was to wash my hair! i didn't wash my hair last night and i think it stink! haha! cause i wanted to sleep earlier thus cannot wash hair cause it wouldn't dry in time! no worries, it's smelling really good and very clean now:) read through some blogs today, and i can't help feeling inspired and like whao! every person can inspire u abt something in your life... geezz, mom's home there's dinner tonight! and she's so nice to make herbal tea for me i'm freaking touched and LOVED!:) now you know why i love her so so so so so so so much? although we always quarrel but quarrels are made so tht we could understand better isn't it? okay doesn't sounds very right.. bahhh! whatever. i'm off to drink herbal tea now:) dinner and then swallow those awful tabs then COMA! friday will be a better day~! Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Tuesday's Entry-10.11.09 Hellos to the very exciting week ! From Monday till Sunday… everyday is packed. I’m going to get some gifts really soon, administrating my life jotting down details on my planner just felt so good. Really reminds me those days when I’m still serving in church Running errands and shopping for gifts, it was the most privilege journey of my life. Ima gonna be back in ministry soon! Mix feelings, a lot of thoughts… like gosh! I haven’t been around for so long, have been missing church as well.. And darn, I’m so different right now. Will I be up to it? Ect…. I swear it’s going to be hard, but let’s do it again:) I can’t remember this is the how many times I’m saying lets do it again I hope God is not sick of it yet, because I can’t do it on my own. I think some guys are just total jack a** Ooops, I didn’t just said that. I’m pretty ugly on the inside, but at least I do not pretend everything is ok and move on in life because it will explode in due season:) if being real is so hard at 20, it's gonna be even harder when we get older i will never be un-real. Wednesday-11.11.09 If 11.11am/pm is a sign that someone is thinking of you then someone would be thinking of you for the whole of today because it's 11.11.09! hahaha:D i'm still quite vain over my purple nails... purple reminds me of bruises(blue black) well it's nt that colour on my nails okays! long nails=cannot play guitar sign... it's girls night out tonight! Monday, November 9, 2009
i'm so so so so so so so so... craving for YAMI Yogurt!!! topped with gronola nuts.. oh my (drools) i've been wanting to eat them for weeks, but they're always close the ultra sian-ness of rushing dwn basment 4 of ion to see the shop close:( never mind, i'll eat them soon!  Sunday, November 8, 2009
blogging from my cellie again This time round feeling alittle all over the place, alittle painful on the inside because happy moment nv last long enough to savour em:) As ima typin this my dearie folks r all sleeping,after 2of em had neat martell dwn their throat!! i'm quite sure they'll only be awake only in the late late morning, haha:D i'm wide awake! Craving for a good breakfast..my eye's really dry.. and i'm freezing in a room with a half spoilt air con and a full speed fan yes, i'm complaining... Thank God for friends :) i love each and everyone of them dearly Friday, November 6, 2009
3 doughnut from doughnut factory A lot of chocolates, chips, ICE CREAM And yes, spent a lot of money Urgent leave, just to stay at home yesterday And all these, FATS and CALORIES just to make me feel alittle better YES! I eat just to feel better Hahaha… very bad habit! Well this will continue until I find another better way New nick name? tequila pop! What drinks pple first thought of me? Tequila pop/alcohol too! I think Love’s like tequila pop No kick on the outside appearance Excitement once you pop it, totally cool when u swallow em But absolutely disgusting after it’s down ur throat. Spent my urgent leave slowly yesterday As it says urgent… actually it’s all excuses, I just wanted to have sometime Of my own for a day without taking an mc. It’s therapeutic to do manicure and going to the salon to get my hair washed Little things I enjoy doing every time!… it’s expensive! but every women deserves to be PAMPERED! :D However, I don’t find any interest in branded stuff… Rather save the $ up for a worthy vacation… Going for Manicure and Pedicure with joanne tomorrow! Whoo! Pamper me session:D Exploring a different side of me! Cross finger, that tomorrow would not be a rainy day Last but not least, a pretty photo!  Current Track: Big girls don't cry Wednesday, November 4, 2009
I witness the most beautiful thing out of my office window today dark clouds moving away and the sun shine right into the office it was so bright that i couldn't see much after:) totally brighten up my day. walking on another path, and yes i will die trying. seems like He's painting something to me which i kinda don't understand Christianity is not a religion, it's a relationship:) actually there's some thoughts, but i'm not giving a second thought abt it because i know i'm much stronger then tht.. gosh, insomnia:( bahhhhh! Sunday, November 1, 2009
blogging from my phone @ occ Gosh, weekends always pass by so fast! Keeps u wanting it to be longer all the time! i had a sweet one, fri night esp Sat's halloween! Nv played halloween b4 it was a eye experience to see alot of pple dressing up nevertheless:) Woke up tdy in shock thinking tht it's a working day at 12ish habouring thoughts tht ima gonna be so dead for turning up late for work.. haha... Working life haunts u like debt. |
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