Generally this is a debate I stay our of. Honestly, I don’t think that one is better than the other. They are just different lifestyle choices and each has pros and cons. What’s best for one family may not be best for another. I think that most moms question their decision from time to time, whatever side of the fence they sit on. I know that I have wondered if it really made sense to pay so much money to send the kiddo to daycare while I went to the office. And I’ve wondered whether he gets enough attention and whether it’s worth all the illnesses and guilt. I think on the other side there are probably debates about whether there is enough interaction with other children and if the activities are educational enough and whether you’ll be able to retire on time and send the kid to college.
I do a lot of posting and reading online so I see my fair share of the SAHM vs. working mom debates and it’s not uncommon for a mom to pipe up with some ridiculous comment about how wrong it is to pay someone else to raise their children. That’s when you gasp at how horribly offensive that remark is and jump into the debate with guns blazing. Last night was the first time anyone ever made that comment to my face. That’s right. Someone actually said “I couldn’t bring myself to pay that much money to someone else to raise my children”. :::GASP::: Did I join the debate with my guns blazing? Nope. I was too shocked to say anything and I regret that I didn’t.
Yes, my child does spend a large portion of his time at daycare, but they are no more raising him than the elementary school down the street will be when the time comes for him to go there. They watch him, guide him and teach him, but they certainly do not raise him.
Now, I don’t really want to go off on this tangent. I have a lot of respect (and occasional jealousy) for SAHMs, that just wasn’t the right path for us. In honor of that, here are a few pros of our chosen lifestyle:
-Gavin gets a lot of interaction with other kids his age.
-Gavin gets more educationally than I could ever provide, including the basics in both English and Spanish. Not that Spanish is essential, but I really don’t feel qualified to lead him in educational activities the way that they do.
-Most days Gavin loves it there.
-Even if our take home pay is dwindling, we’re still socking money away into 2 401Ks
-Staying in the workforce means that my income will continue to go up. I’ll be much better off in 5 years than if I were trying to re-enter the workforce.
-Re-entry into the workforce would be nearly impossible after a break considering I’m a computer programmer and the technology changes daily.
-I like my job. Being employed makes me feel happy and fulfilled.
-I get to talk to adults every day and have some freedom to do things like run errands kid free.
-I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be as happy staying at home.
So there you go. Coming back from maternity leave I felt miserable for a few weeks. No sleep, hormones, guilt. I’m pretty sure it will happen again. But we’re in a routine now. We’re all happy with the daily grind and I wouldn’t trade it for anyone else s’ life (unless it involved a huge pile of cash and a better house, LOL).
IVF on the Down Low 
