Back from road trip

Did quite a few villages/towns in North Devon over the weekend.

A combination of hiking, coastal walks, country-folk festivals, sandy beaches, magnificient cliffs in four days.

It was a good outing. I feel recharged now that I'm back in the office.

Defy convention

I do admit I sounded emo in my previous entry. What else to blame? PMS!

I went for a two day course this week. It's good to be out of the office for a bit. Met new people, especially people from the tunnelling design team and also software application engineer.

I don't have many questions in the class and I was almost quiet during heated technical debates. But I do feel smart just to be around smart people!

Happy endings

Just finished watching the final episode of 'Gossip Girl'. Blair is getting her fairytale ending. Serena, Dan, Nate and Chuck are back to being themselves. Ah, I love happy endings.

It's almost the end of three weeks since moving to Birmingham. I now live in a shared house. It is supposed to be a 4 bedroom house sharing with girls only. But after moving in, I realise, in the same house, there is another two separate units. One girl lives downstairs. Her 'self contained' flat is just next to the kitchen. Then there's another 'self contained flat on the third floor where I was told a couple lives. It's been three weeks. Not three days ok. We all share the house, and we know each other is physically in the house. But unfortunately, I have not met the couple, or the girl whose room is just next to mine. When I walked pass her room sometimes, I could hear her talking to someone, and there's sound from the tv in the background.

What is wrong with this country?!

I really miss how I was brought up in Malaysia. Where you know your neighbours and at least, you'd say good morning when you leave the house for work, or good bye when you come home. Or you have a healthy relationship with your colleagues, i.e. you talk, you connect and you work well as a team.

I know I am being totally sensitive here.

Just last weekend, the girl downstairs slammed her door at me while I was in the kitchen and made it really clear that it was because I was cooking and she hates the smell. Hello, what else do you want me to say. It's not my fault you want to live next to a kitchen!

And, you know what. I'm gonna say this. Just wanna let this bloody thing out.

After breaking up with my freaking boyfriend, I moved on and did not let any opportunity slipped when a guy comes by.

And so you know, I have this crush on S which probably I have written quite a few entries about my insanely hormone rush on him. Then, over the last year we grew cold towards each other and it was pretty obvious that this will not lead to the type of relationship which I want to take things further.

We totally stopped getting in touch and not even a single sneeze we hear from each other for the past 6 months or so.

Then I met another guy R. We were working on a project together and we were paired up doing the same shift. Three months on site and things pretty much got heated up. We talked, we had eye contacts and just when I thought he might be the guy I am going to date.. Boom! I was told by someone else that he is actually, married. How bizarre can this be?

I actually liked this guy. He listened when I speak, he speaks his views. We communicate. He respected me. For just three months, even it's just to impress someone, I can't deny. He is good. So it was not just sexual attraction going on. I felt really dirty and betrayed when I knew he is married. So when I confronted him, he didn't deny it. Yes, he said he loves his family more than anything. Then WTF didn't you make it clear in the first place.

I am not a good person. I was tempted. Even though we'd say we just remain friends, we'd still talk. And talked even more when all the million other problems that are going on around our lives. I will come to that later. Maybe next entry I promise.

I needed a friend. Really. My best friend is getting married. She is busy preparing her wedding. My BFF Ryan just left the UK as he got a new job in Singapore. BFF Carine is in Malaysia. Though I know she'd always be there to listen to me wind over the phone. I just miss having a living friend in front of me. I got to know a girl recently. Went out with her and her friends a few times. I am not in the same wavelength as hers. Somehow, something is missing between us.

So Mr Married guy was conveniently here. He needed someone to talk to. His wife doesn't want to have sex with him. Why wouldn't people don't want to make love?! Anyway, people have their differences. After few saucy texts that he started sending me, it snapped me. That's it. And I call it off. I stopped responding to him and I'd say, the bad news is I lost another friend. But good news is I didn't commit adultery.

And did I mentioned before S lives in this same city? After I started work here, we sort out started chatting again. I really hate it when my heart beats so fast when I see him. And I can't even control the levels of my hormones. But the thing about S is, it's mostly online chatting or texting, or late night calls. Now the lines from the movie, "He's just not into you" will start popping in at the back of my tiny head.

He-is-just-not-into-me.

I look into the mirror everyday, and I start not to like what I see. Is this really me? Why is it so difficult to be me in this freaking place?

Coming to another city is supposed to be a change and giving myself another chance to work things out.

Let's just hope, I will be able to survive. And my happy ending is not too far away.

Walk baby walk

I've just checked the exact distance of my daily walk to work.

2.2miles! i.e. = 3.5km per journey.

So in total, I walk at least 7km per day, and that is not including detours to the supermarket. No wonder every Saturday I sleep like a pig and won't go out of the house. Because obviously, I don't want to get out and do more walking.

I used to stay really close to the city centre back in Cardiff. And I only need 7 minutes to walk to work. Rooms for rent in Birmingham city centre are way more expensive. Which is why my current place is much cheaper though there's 3.5km walk that comes with it. I could save over £300 by staying 50 minutes walk away.

However, it's only half a month of walking, and I'm starting to think about getting a bike. And bikes here are not cheap. A decent bike could cost at least £400. That might not include all the necessary accessories. So, I try to convince myself that walking is a good exercise for me after all. Since I've quit gym and no more swimming for me over here, the only workout I could make do is by walking 7km a day 5 times a week. So that is 35km a week to the least. I could burn calories and eat more ice cream! Lol.

Al Qaeda leader Killed

The most wanted man in the world - Osama bin Laden has been killed.