All about Ace

We're approaching the halfway mark of this pregnancy and wanted to record a few details.

Detail No. 1: We're not naming the baby Ace. We are calling the creature growing inside me Ace -- short for Acetaminophen, since I've taken a crazy amount of Tylenol this pregnancy. You would think that after twins, a singleton pregnancy would be a waddle in the park. Unfortunately I went into this pregnancy the most unhealthy I've been in my life -- unhealthy as in sick all the time and unhealthy as in not exercising or eating well because I was sick all the time (or, you know, because I like not exercising and not eating well). The result: aye-aye-aye. Being preggers, sick and out of shape is the opposite of awesome.

Detail No. 2: We know we said we were done. We lied. But not on purpose. Due to complications with the twins, our OB was very clear that even if we could get pregnant again we really, really shouldn't. But some experiences early on for both of us made us feel like someone was missing. So we held out hope that we could pull off one more miracle. It wasn't until we finally gave up -- and sincerely considered our current family complete -- that we wound up with a surprise miracle.

Detail No. 3: I had put off MS treatment specifically because we were hoping to get pregnant again (MS drugs and pregnancy do not mix). As I grew more symptomatic, we knew we needed to set a deadline to give up on getting pregnant and get back on treatment. The deadline came and went and we started the lengthy process of getting back on medication. The (very expensive) meds arrived by special courier late in the summer and I was supposed to start them right away, but partly because of premonition (but mostly out of procrastination) I decided not to start them until my next period. I'm still waiting.

Detail No. 4: We have had a few scares along the way, but right now we're sitting at almost 19 weeks along and things are looking good. We feel very blessed.

Detail No. 5: Once again we won't be finding out the gender until the delivery. The delivery, by the way, will be by c-section and if all goes well will take place in early May.

Detail No. 6: The kids are thrilled about having a new baby, though Hawk told me tonight that if it wanted to stay in my tummy forever, that would be OK. He's a very sensitive, in-tune child and I'm assuming he can sense how this is going to rock his world.

Detail No. 7: Yes, it's definitely just one baby. Now whether it has two heads or not we won't know until our ultrasound in the next few weeks. My money is on one head, three brains.

Detail No. 8: One of the ways I tried to "help" myself get pregnant was by getting rid of all our maternity and baby stuff. I figured, "Oh, the second I give away my maternity clothes, that's when I'll get pregnant." Then, "The day after I give away all our baby clothes, that's when we'll get pregnant." I managed to not get pregnant in that 18 month period of giving all our things away, but I sure did clear out a lot of space.

Detail No. 9: On that note, if anyone has maternity clothes they'd be willing to loan me, I would be eternally grateful. As for baby stuff, we have been holding on to hand-me-downs since learning we were pregnant. That means this baby will be dressed in diapers only until it is 2 1/2 if its a boy and 6 1/2 if it's a girl. So, you know, that's not too bad.

Detail No. 10: I don't throw up during pregnancy. I do wet my pants. A lot. Including one time at work today. So there's a fun mental image for all of you. And a fair warning not to sit next to me on a bus or train or anything like that any time soon.

A Year of Mac and Cheese: November

We are five weeks into our Year of Mac and Cheese and so far I've learned two things. One, food is crazy hard to photograph well. The dishes in real life look amazing, and my photos make them look gloppy and gross. I have long coveted the life of professional food photographers (I assume they always get to eat what they photograph immediately after the shoot). Now I really, really wish I had that skill.

Two, I've learned that I will never get sick of mac and cheese. At least not after a month. We'll see how much I'm still loving it after 12 (I assume one heck of a lot).

Week One: Jade's Famous Mac and Cheese
Source: Adapted family recipe
New name: I gave it this one, so no need for a new one

So really this is an old family recipe that I thought I knew by heart when I went off to college but learned years later that I was missing about three or four ingredients. Therefore I feel I can claim this version as my own. This has long been my favorite meal. I've had it for my birthday almost every year since my older sister stopped calling the shots for me, aka when I could start screaming louder and more shrill (more shrill-ly? shill-er? shrill-ly-er?) than her. Naturally we started off with that. And it was good, as always.

To make it at least a little different, we added some roasted butternut squash on the side. Oh yummers. Really yummers.

Jade's Famous Mac and Cheese Recipe:
2 cups elbow macaroni, cooked according to directions
1 can tomato soup
1/2 to 1 cup grated cheddar

While noodles are cooking, warm the tomato soup. Gradually add cheese until melted. Drain noodles and stir in cheese mixture.

Week Two: Something Terrible
Source: The deep, dark, self-loathing recesses of my mind
New name for it: No, this name is appropriate. It sticks.

Yeah, this week went horribly wrong. I foolishly thought I could wing a recipe and make something up on the fly. It did not go well. Which is good because now I'm not heart broken that I both forgot to take pictures and write down the recipe.

Week Three: The Best Macaroni and Cheese Ever
Source: kitchentreaty.com
Our new name for it: Baked Smokey Mac and Cheese

The grown-ups loved this one, especially the smokey flavor from the smoked paprika. The kids would have liked it had they given it a change. They didn't. Not one bite. Not one of them. Oh well.

The recipe is available here.

Week Four: Chuckwagon Chili Mac
Source: kraftrecipes.com
Our new name for it: Cowboy Mac and Cheese

Now this? This the kids ate. And ate. And ate. I told them the kidney beans were magic beans and we renamed it Cowboy Mac and Cheese. Then I set the tone by telling stories about their cowboy grandpa (my Grandpa Janes) while they ate and the result? Lots of smiles. And also second and third helpings.

We served them with corn bread muffins, which were also a hit.

The recipe is available here.

Winner: Jade's Famous Mac and Cheese

Of the four recipes we tried in November, Jade's Famous Mac and Cheese moves on to the next round (the round robin I've just decided we'll have after the year is over, where the top recipes of each month will face-off). To be honest, that recipe was going to win the month no matter what it was up against. But considering the success we've already had in December, it may not be a sure-thing for overall winner.

Stay tuned.

Maybe your pants come down a little

Once when I was giving a Relief Society lesson in church, my skirt fell off and I stood in front of 15 or so lovely ladies wearing nothing but my slip.

Today's wardrobe malfunction was much less modest.

We're not quite 17 weeks along with this pregnancy and already I feel pretty huge. I'm blaming it on my uterus expanding when I was pregnant with the twins, but in reality it was the influx of Twinkies I ate both when Twinkies were about to go under and when they came back online. Considering we were done having kids back in '11, I got rid of all my maternity clothes. Considering I have a serious case of denial going on, I have yet to reacquire any.

No biggie -- I can wear dresses from now until the end of time. One problem -- underwear is always advisable but when wearing a dress I'd say it's mandatory. And, TMI, currently my underwear has me in a bit of a pickle.

So here's the sitch. Today I just couldn't take it anymore. My underwear normally sits at my hips. OK, my waist. My upper waist. I'm one of those. But with my added girth these days, it doesn't take long before that gets uber uncomfortable. So I decided to low-ride it for church today.

You already know where this is going, I suppose. Well, I wish you could have warned me because I had no idea.

Ben was down with a sinus infection so I took the kids to church solo. Sacrament meeting as always involved a fair amount of squirming from and with the boys. Fortunately I was crazy comfortable without my waistband digging into my midsection. Unfortunately the squirming sent my waistband a bit lower than expected. Quite a bit lower. A fact I didn't realize until trying to exit the chapel after sacrament meeting and almost tripping. On my underwear. Which was around my knees.

No, not ankles. Ankles would have been better -- maybe I could have discreetly slipped them off, thrown them in my bag and later remedied the situation in the bathroom. But no. As luck would have it, I was wearing a pair of tall boots -- pirate boots, as my sister calls them. And so my underwear was caught on my boots around my knees.

Naturally at the same time all four kids were trying to make a break for it and I was trying to gather all of our things. I did what anyone else in my situation would do -- penguin-walked right out of that chapel, shuffled into the nursery, and mortified a bunch of 2-year-old kids when I (modestly) pulled my undies back into their proper place.

I'm not sure if anyone saw the whole thing go down. The nice thing about a big crowd like that is that everyone else is just as involved shepherding their kids or avoiding members of the bishopric who may give you a speaking assignment. I am sure that I ordered new maternity underwear the second I got home and I'm certain that it can't get here a moment too soon. But since there was no expedited shipping option, local friends beware -- if you see me waddling in the next few weeks it may be less the pregnancy and more the underwear shackle that's holding me back.