Password Protection

I’m not entirely sure how I’m going to be using the password protection feature on Wordpress however I would like to set it up from the start. If you would like the password, please join me at http://mommaoak.wordpress.com/ for info. Clickable link in my previous entry.

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It's time to say goodbye...

Please update your blog roll/readers accordingly. We're outta here!
Check out my new blog (new name) at: http://mommaoak.wordpress.com/

Further thoughts...

I blogged the below entry to share what I feel. I'm not in any danger of doing anything stupid... I've never been there because I'm VERY aware of how I feel and I know when I need to talk to my doctor. I understand the issues that I have yet it doesn't stop them from consuming me every now and then...



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Mental Health

For the last week or so I've been tiptoeing around a mental health crisis and in the past 24 hours I've had 3 minor panic attacks. I don't know what is going on since I had been feeling pretty good. All I know is that I'm walking dangerously close to the edge and can feel anxiety pulsing through me.
Sometimes I'll blog when I'm feeling this way but most times I don't. I didn't blog about my meltdown 3 days before Disney or the one I had on the eve of Christmas eve. During the latter D thought I should be committed. She didn't get why I'd want to go to Walmart at midnight to buy enough Lysol wipes to hand mop the floor... and then proceed to hand mop the floor.
Having a mental illness sucks and what used to be controlled before pregnancy is back worse than ever. I've been trying to get help but now I fear that as I pursue it my doctor will judge me and say I shouldn't have another child.
Really, I'm a normal person who for the most part lives a very normal life. I have a job that I have never had sick leave from and I get up even on mornings when I'd rather hide under my covers. I keep going. I love Sadie and do so many fun things with her...
If only I could get rid if the obsessive thoughts in my head and live life like everyone else.
If only...


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Little Decision Time

I think we're going to be pulling the plug on The Little Gym soon. I'm just trying to decide if we stay for the winter months or not.
Ugh. I'm sad to think about this since TLG has become a very familiar and welcoming place. I'm going to miss the instructors and the families we've been with for months. There is also the fact that Sadie screams and claps as soon as she realizes we're going there. She loves it. I love it too. I look forward to it every week and at one point wanted to add a second class!
So, why am I pulling her out?
I'm no longer trusting their philosophy of letting the children explore without limits. Sadie can't handle it. The idea is to let the children do what they wish as long as the parent participates and the result for us has been Sadie thinking she can do whatever the **** she wants EVERYWHERE we go.
My mom has been complaining about this for a while now but it took a TLG kid tearing up Sadie's music class last weekend for me to finally buy into the idea. The two kids in the class that were causing a ruckus were TLG members. Uh oh.
Then, at our last TLG class, Sadie didn't seem interested in participating in anything. All she wanted to do was do what SHE wanted to do. We'd been having such a good run too. It's been months since I'd last wanted to pull my hair out in frustration.
So I think it's time. We need to start preparing Sadie for school in a year and a half. She needs to learn to listen and follow instruction. She needs programs that expect this of her.
I think we'll *all* be getting memberships to the YMCA with the $95/month I'll be freeing up (yes, it's THAT expensive for a 45 min class once a week!).






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Eeek! Finally!

We have our first half-sib match on the DSR! A baby girl that is less than a month old. I let my membership slide so I'm not contacting them yet.....

This is SUPER exciting!


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I forgot to Mention...

....that Sadie is talking.

She's had a surge of words over the last couple of weeks and is talking way more than even the day she was last assessed. At that appointment I had mentioned that she was starting to chatter a lot of nonsense and was told that was a good sign. Within that very week she changed.

She can now say 2 word sentences. Mostly "No, Mine!" and "I do". When I ask her something she will acknowledge me by saying "Ohhh-kay" or "Kay". She surprises us daily with the things that she says and does. Last Tuesday D asked her what she had done that day. Her response (correct answer with appropriate arm and leg motions) was "I swim", and "I kick".  Awesome!

 So she's behind, there's not doubt about that, but she's made progress on her own. It's pretty amazing to witness it.

 Update: I spoke to my mom and we are going to send her to ALL of the "Parent Education" sessions. D and I are now in the process of negotiating the half-day work from home/personal time hours to accomplish this. It is going to work out that we both have one half-day per month for the next two months and then I will have one additional in April. I'm somewhat disappointed that I'm not going to be getting to participate in these sessions but to ask for 12+ hours (when adding in commuting) is a bit extreme and we have our vacation fully planned (with only a few floating vacation days). The schedule for this program is a bit crazy in my opinion. It isn't even well suited for stay at home parents because who will watch their children?

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