Amazing.. two posts in one month

The last couple of weeks have been busy. On Friday, Jeff and I managed to go on our first date in over six months! I have an incredible visiting teacher who was willing to allow me to drop the kids off at her house (instead of having to clean mine for a babysitter..). We picked up a quick dinner and went to the movies (for the first time in over five years!). We saw "The Iron Lady" and we were both very impressed with the movie and enjoyed ourselves! If you haven't seen it, do--it was fantastic; very good acting, and the best part--no political spin that I could detect!

David had his one year physical exam last week (a little late). He's on the small side. He's about 21 lbs 9 oz. but still in the 22nd percentile or so. Maybe he'll be small like Adam--who knows? He definitely has a small head! While we were in the doctor's office, our family doctor highly recommended I get Adam and McKay in for their flu shots (David got his at his exam). So we went in Friday with Adam and McKay who were both very anxious about getting their flu shot. McKay was brave and volunteered to go first. He soon regretted his decision as the nurse swabbed his shoulder. He got really jittery and had trouble looking at me, but as soon as he turned his head toward me, the nurse did it. "OUCH!" McKay squealed, but then it was over. No tears!

Then it was Adam's turn. He saw McKay's anxiety and was just as scared. Adam kept saying that he wanted the shot to go into the skinniest part of him, and the nurse and I kept explaining that you actually wanted it to go into the fattest part of you so you don't hit a bone or something else (maybe that was a bad idea on hindsight..). He also wanted to look and kept saying he didn't want a shot. Mid-sentence (while Adam had his head turned), the nurse got him, and Adam just kept on talking. He didn't even feel it! Both boys were incredibly proud of themselves, and I was also proud of my boys. They aren't babies anymore. What a difference it was between David's shots and then the older boy's reactions to their flu shots. They sat there, didn't have to be held down, and didn't cry. Sure they were scared, but aren't we all? No one likes shots! I just love being their Mom.

Oh, another happening recently was that I cut David's hair. David's hair had become so long it was getting into his eyes, and it simply refused to be combed to the side or back. When food in the hair became a problem, I simply couldn't bear it any longer. It did, however, break my heart to see the beautiful locks of white-blonde hair fall to the floor as my clippers grazed over his head. He looks like a little boy now. He's walking..not full time, but almost. He also likes to play with the TV remote. He'll point it at the TV and turn it off! He also likes to talk on the phone. He got the phone in his hands the other day and said "Uhwoah!" I can tell David is very perceptive. My sister, Emily, visited us a couple of weeks ago. We were playing "Just Dance" (we've got the kids version--fun!!--as well as Just Dance 3 for Wii). Between songs we noticed David sitting on the floor, facing the tv, waving his hands in the air. He wanted to dance too! Absolutely adorable!

Emily's visit was an unexpected treat. I still had to work both nights she was staying at our house, but I was able to pick her up from the airport on her first night. We went to the North End in Boston and had pizza at the original Pizzeria Regina (the supreme style was wonderful!). Then we got cannoli at Mike's Pastry! Those things were huge and tasted amazing. Then I took Emily to her hotel and we watched Alabama win the national championship game. I hope Emily has more work conferences up here in Woburn! It was fantastic to see her, and it made me miss her. We enjoyed breakfast at Harry's diner here in Westborough (really good breakfast special! Love the hot cocoa--David loves the whipped cream..). Then we got to tackle snow on the way to the airport for Emily's early flight home. So worth it though! She knows I'd go through snow for her :)

I don't know if I mentioned that I'm the primary chorister in my ward. It's been going well. It takes a ton of energy, but I can see the payoff almost immediately when I see that the kids are learning and taking in the lessons. I can feel the Spirit and have begun to truly love the children in my ward. The nursery kids are also getting used to me and enjoy singing. It all makes me want to become better!

It's getting late and I need to close this and head to bed. On with another week!

Terrible at the Blog thing...

So if any of you guys don't know or haven't figured it out yet, I'm a terrible journal writer, and I'm also terrible at this blog thing as well! I've resolved with this new year that I would try again at updating the blog, if not for all of you, for myself and for my kids. There are so many family memories we have had in the past years that I haven't written, and I'm having regrets about it. Instead of trying to write all of the things we've done in the last two years, I'm just going to do a quick run of the highlights from 2011 on..

A couple of days ago, Adam (7) and McKay (5) were pretending and playing together. They were at one point comparing their heights, seeing who was taller than the other. David (1) must have been on a nap because I was cleaning the kitchen, just listening and watching. As I watched, I could tell and feel that my boys loved each other and were best friends. My heart just swelled inside me at this special witness. I hope Adam and McKay can continue to be best friends and look out for each other, even when they do things that drive each other crazy. This moment was so special to me that I wanted to make sure I could write it and remember it forever.

To put the last two years into a nutshell, Jeff finished up his postdoc at Yale, got a job at Genzyme in Framingham, MA, and we moved to Westborough, MA in August of 2010. I was pregnant with our third son, David at the time. David was born December 10, 2010 after a unique and somewhat more difficult pregnancy (than the other 2) and after a second induction (first induction did not "take," and the Dr. would not break my water..so went home the first time after 6 hours on pitocin). David is truly a special boy. He would melt your heart to interact with him, and he is incredibly good natured.

In May of 2011, my Dad, who had been unemployed for the past 11 months, moved up to Connecticut to start a contract job working with Sikorsky. Since he was going to be living only 2 hours away from our home in Massachusetts, I forced him to come up and visit us every weekend. From Memorial Day to mid-July, Dad would drive the 2 hours to our home every Friday, spend the weekend with us, go to church with us, and drive home after Sunday dinner. I enjoyed every moment having him with us. I would do his laundry for him on weekends, make his favorite foods (which we also loved too! Who doesn't like beef stew, or Roast Beef and Mashed Potatoes?), take him with me on couponing runs (a hobby I picked up in Spring 2011. Dad always loved a great deal, so he enjoyed it a lot.), and just spend time together.

One weekend in June, my Mom drove up to Pennsylvania to visit her Dad (my Grandpa Austin--the one who owns the tractor the boys are sitting on in the photo that has been at the top of this page for so long). I decided last minute to drive down with my Dad, so I picked up Adam after school and drove the 2 hours down to Dad's house in CT, picked him up and enjoyed a sonic burger with him. Then we traveled the 4-5 hours around NYC to Hummelstown. About an hour or two into the trip, right after crossing the Tappanzee Bridge, Dad informed me that he would have to stop for a bathroom break. I didn't take him seriously since I knew he had an ostomy pouch, so I thought we had time. Then he told me that we either had to stop for him to let out the gas in his pouch or he'd have to do it in the car. Needless to say, I immediately pulled over to the first gas station I could find. We made it down to PA a few hours later. We had a great weekend. Mom and Dad were able to break away and spend a couple nights together, and the kids and I had a blast at Grandma and Grandpa Austin's house and also spending time with my mother's Aunts (Linda and Harriett) from New Hampshire. We enjoyed an amazing buffet breakfast at Shady Maple Smorgasborg. I was sorry Jeff couldn't join us. It was special, though, to spend the one on one time with my Dad, talking together for the 4-5 hours each way from him home. I will never forget it!

We got to spend Father's Day with Dad, and we also spent the fourth of July together. On the Fourth, we spent a day at the lake with the kids and followed it with a steak dinner at Texas Roadhouse. Dad kept talking about how great the steak was and what a tasty salad he had! (We had grilled out the day before, hence the reason we chose a steakhouse for dinner that day!)

In July Dad got ready to move to Elmira, New York to continue his contract job for Sikorsky. His moving time coincided with the Hill Cummorah Pageant in Palmyra, NY. Palmyra was just a couple of hours from Elmira, and Dad really wanted to see it since he had served his mission in that area and been a part of the pageant while on his mission. I'd never been to the pageant, and the timing was so last minute that we originally hadn't planned on joining him. However, I started to feel like if we didn't just go, then we would probably never go. So Dad packed his car with his things, drove up to Westborough on Friday night, and I did his laundry one last time before we left Saturday morning for Palmyra. And then we did a caravan to Palmyra. We camped in the fairgrounds in Palmyra (not recommended..). After setting up our tent, we checked out the Hill Cummorah visitors center. We then had a pizza picnic dinner. We let Adam and McKay play on a playground near the center of town and ate our pizza and salads. The pageant was truly amazing, and I could just see the excitement on my Dad's face as he visited and saw all the sites he remembered from his mission. The most special part was being there with him. We attended church Sunday morning, and then we sinned and went to Ponderosa Steak House for lunch. Dad really wanted to go there since he had gone there on his mission and had fond memories of it. Then we checked out the temple grounds and went to the sacred grove. Dad ran into his brother Brent's son who just happened to be there at the same time! After that, we went our separate ways since we had to drive 6 hours back to MA.

The rest of the summer was wonderful. We had our first real camping trip with our family down at Cape Cod. There's a state park down there called Nickerson State Park, and it's within 30 minutes of Cape Cod National Seashore. It was fantastic to spend long days at the beach and then roast marshmellows on the fire at night. We went there originally since Adam wanted to go camping for his birthday (Adam and McKay and Jeff and my Dad had gone on a father-son campout around Memorial Day I believe). We loved the Cape so much we went there again in August for 3 days. We feel like it's a vacation spot just two hours away!

Adam and McKay both started school in September. Adam is repeating the first grade, and McKay started kindergarten. They are at different schools since Adam's program for his Autism is not at our neighborhood school. It presents an active morning where Adam gets picked up by his van at 8am and then I have to walk McKay to his bus stop by 8:15 or so. McKay has a half day, and Adam is on full day for school, so the day is broken up into 2 hour increments.

July was the last we saw of Dad before the world turned upside down. Dad had been having trouble with his write hand. I thought it might be something with tendonitis or something, but he couldn't turn the key to start his ignition. He'd have to reach over with his left hand and turn the key. Pretty soon after Dad went out to Elmira, he began tripping and falling. He had a couple visits to the ER for stitches, and from there he decided he needed to get to the bottom of whatever was going on. It worried him that he couldn't do situps, and getting up stairs to his third floor apartment was becoming unbearable. He visited a doctor from his ward, an oncologist, who referred him to a neurologist. He had a couple of MRIs and was referred to another neurologist at the University of Rochester. At this point, Mom was pretty worried about him, and she took a one way flight up to Elmira to help Dad. At the appointment with the neurologist in Rochester, they got the terrible news. Dad had ALS, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis, or Lou Gherig's disease. Prognosis wasn't good..most people live only 3 to 5 years. The Dr. said Dad's case was particularly aggressive and that he shouldn't be working. So in early October, Dad quit his contract job, and he and Mom packed up to head back to Alabama. We were lucky that they stopped in Westborough to visit us before they headed down. This was the last time I saw my Dad when he was well enough to speak and move around. They joined us for General Conference, and Dad went with Jeff to the Priesthood session. Our ward does a steak dinner for the men before the General Priesthood Meeting. At this point, Dad was having trouble eating and maneuvering, so Jeff had to cut his steak for him.

On November 10th I got a text message that Dad was doing very poorly, couldn't eat, and would probably not make it through the weekend and might not make it through the day. I took the first flight down to Huntsville with David on my lap, and was shocked to see that my Dad was in a coma. He died on November 12th, in his sleep, in his bedroom, with my Mom asleep in a separate bed next to him. Jeff left that day to drive Adam and McKay down with him to Alabama. The funeral was the following Tuesday. I was incredibly touched at the outpouring of love, the number of lives my Dad had touched and blessed, and I was also more shocked than I could believe at the fact that my Dad had moved on, and we were all still here to live on without him.

We left Alabama the Monday before Thanksgiving (Adam cried the whole two day drive home because he didn't want to leave Grandma and Alabama), and since we got back so close to Thanksgiving, we had our first Cracker Barrel Thanksgiving Dinner. I was simply unmotivated to try to put the meal together. The holidays have been somewhat empty, missing my Dad, but our kids have a way of bringing the Spirit of the Season into my life! They were so excited for Christmas, and I wanted so much to see them happy that it forced me to do things like make cookies!

Christmas was special. The boys got many things they loved, but they also learned more about the Christmas story and the reason we celebrate and give gifts. I am so proud that Adam and McKay have a desire to do what is right, and they are learning the gospel.

The big hit in our house since Christmas is the new Nintendo Wii. I know we're a few years behind on it, but the kids are at a great age and they love it! We've been trying to beat Super Mario Bros. and Epic Mickey. We also enjoy the Just Dance games. We got Just Dance for kids and did it on New Years Eve as a family!

I also started a new job in the fall. I work as a pharmacy technician at CVS pharmacy. My work is very understanding about letting me be home with my kids, so I work a few nights a week and on Saturday. It has been a good job for me, but it's also very tiring to work until 11PM and then do the school schedule in the morning... I also miss the Saturdays we were spending together as a family, but we would like to get out of debt and it looks like that's the only way we can do it. My work was also a blessing because it made it possible to easily pay for the trip down to Alabama and the emergency plane ticket.

So this leads us to today. Our schedule involves getting kids to school, keeping up our house and family responsibilities, fulfilling our callings (Jeff is in the EQ Pres. and I'm the primary chorister), and trying to teach and support our children. So after this post, things will hopefully be shorter and less "epic" and more about the simple day to day moments that make up this life of ours. Thanks for your patience with me!

Adam's in School!

So, I mentioned in my last post that we're trying to find Adam an appropriate placement. Well, in the meantime, Adam is attending a special education Pre-K program at a nearby school. He loves his teacher, Rosie (and we do, too!), and he prays for her and his fellow classmates every day! One of the highlights of going to school is that his teacher has a lot of Thomas the Tank Engine trains and tracks! And another one of Adam's favorite things about school is taking the school bus! I've attached pictures of Adam's bus, and of Adam getting off the bus. The other little squirt trying to get on the bus is McKay. McKay is just green with jealousy that Adam takes the bus every day. McKay insists on wearing Adam's backpack back up the stairs to our apartment after Adam gets off the bus!

Enjoy the pictures of Adam (and McKay)! I can't believe how much he is growing up!

Too long since Christmas!

Well, it's been a while since we updated. It's been a tumultuous few months, but I feel like they've been worth it and for the best! First of all, our Christmas holiday was wonderful. We spent time together with just the four of us, and it was semi-quiet and just wonderful. The kids got way too many new toys, but it's just been great to have them so occupied! I got a fantastic deal on some storage from IKEA. It's called TROFAST and it's just fantastic! It's basically plastic bins that slide into a wooden frame. I've attached a couple of pictures of the kids new play area.


So on to our adventures of the last couple months! On New Year's Day I spent most of the night at the ER with McKay, who suffered anaphylaxis (a severe allergic reaction) to my Trader Joe's English Toffee. He just had a little bite, and he had difficulty breathing, swollen lymph nodes (he had a large double chin from this!), hives, vomiting, and diarrhea--all from just one little bite of the outside (chocolate with almond's & cashews). So, we carry an EpiPen with us all of the time now. Luckily we haven't had to use it. We cleaned the house out of anything that even possibly could have tree nuts. In early February, we saw an allergist at Yale that did some blood work on McKay. His test came back as a Class 5 allergy to Cashew (the culprit on New Years!) and Class 5 for Pistachio as well. He's got a Class 2 allergy to Hazelnut and a Class 1 allergy to Brazil Nut. I'm officially the parent that's going to gripe about nuts when McKay starts school--I never thought I'd have to be that parent...

So on to the next child, and the next big news of our year so far--Adam. Most of you know that Adam has had a speech delay since he was a baby. We've had him evaluated every place we've lived, but all we got was "Yes, Adam has a speech delay, so let's get him some speech therapy." Well, more recently, we've begun to suspect there was possibly more to the delay than just a speech delay. Adam is incredibly bright, yet if you ask him his name or how old he is, he looks at you like you're playing with him. This is definitely not normal for a 4 and a half year old boy ready to start kindergarten! On the other hand, Adam can identify all of his letters, upper and lowercase, and he can write many of them.

I should start by saying that when we moved here to New Haven, we got a fantastic pediatrician at Yale. From the day of Adam's first physical, she has wanted to get down to the bottom of what's going on with Adam. We were in the process already of having Adam evaluated here with the school district at this time, but she went ahead and got us an appointment for an evaluation at the Yale Child Study Center. If you do a search about the Yale Child Study Center, you'll find that it is one of the best places in the world to have your child evaluated if you suspect a Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD), or Autism. It typically takes 6 months to a year to get in. Our pediatrician referred us, and then we got a call the same day to see if we would be willing to have Adam evaluated in 2 weeks! So Adam was evaluated on February 4th and 5th.

The results: Adam is autistic. It's amazing how this news changes your world. It changes how you see your child, at least in terms of realizing that they see their world in a different way. It was an incredible blow. But, I'm so grateful that I was able to get over my own feelings (for the most part--I believe they will always be there) to be able to get educated on how to become a better advocate for Adam. We are currently trying to get Adam an appropriate placement and education based on his new diagnosis. In many ways, this has been "therapy" for me to try to find out what Adam needs and how we can get it.

Part of the reason I haven't updated in a while has been because I wasn't sure how I wanted to break this news to "the world." Well, it seems that although I've only told a handful of people in my ward about this, the whole ward knows, so there's no reason to try to keep it a secret until I was comfortable talking! But just a note to any of you reading this: Please do not think of Adam as anyone besides the adorable, lovable boy he is. I love him just as much, if not more, than I did the day before he was diagnosed.

So, finally, I want to thank all of you who have helped Adam, and helped Jeff and I so far, educating us and helping us with the challenges of getting Adam an appropriate education. You all have been so fantastic, I simply cannot express how grateful we are.

Getting ready for Christmas

Things at the Beckman household have settled down quite a bit since our move. Our Thanksgiving was quiet, but wonderful. I actually baked the turkey, and it even came out well! Any of you who know me, know that I hate dealing with turkey. So I should actually amend my statement and say I baked a turkey breast and it turned out well! This way, I didn't have to deal with the giblets and other disgusting turkey parts (Yes, I know they make the best gravy, but since being pregnant with Adam and having to do a turkey...ok, so morning sickness has long lasting effects..).

I did a "small scale" turkey dinner with all of the fixings, plus homemade pies and rolls (in the bread maker, of course). McKay enjoyed taste-testing the chocolate pie filling (see the picture above! And don't miss the cute haircut performed by yours truly). Jeff enjoyed the quiet, and surprisingly so did I. We had a couple from the ward over for pie later in the evening, and it was the first time in a while we've done that. It was great!

So, now we're in the thick of Christmas preparations! The boys both enjoyed helping put up the Christmas tree. The ornaments were quite "bottom heavy" because the boys put them all on the bottom layer of branches, but it was easily adjusted. Still, they're good helpers when they want to be! And of course, all of the ornaments are from where else--IKEA. Enjoy the pictures!

I also put up a picture of McKay after he got into the ashes from the fireplace. I think he thought he was having fun!

East Rock Park

The kids and I just love to go to the park that's near our apartment. It's called East Rock Park, and it's on the corner of Orange St. and Cold Spring St. in New Haven, if you want to mapquest it. Adam has just started to LOVE swinging! It's taken him 4 years but he has a passion for it now. I've attached pictures of our day out today.

Video of Adam and McKay at Lunch

Click the link above for a fantastic video of the boys at lunch today! There are shout-outs to some of their favorite people!

The video below is of McKay asking for pretzels. He doesn't quite know how to pronounce the word, and it comes out sounding like something vastly different! We thought it was cute (and hilarious!). Jeff is responsible for this video... :)

McKay Pretzel Video