A Lovely Wednesday

Today was a good day. I gained the perspective that I needed from the ladies’ Bible study this morning and it helped me be more gracious with the girls, less harsh when I am frustrated or not being obeyed. I much prefer me that way, the peace-filled gracious way to the frazzled fed-up harsh way, and I’m sure the girls do too! So why can’t I stay in that place... the Christ-centered place....  Is it because this isn’t Heaven? Or because there is still too much of me, in me? I pray that I would be so filled with the gracious Christ that there would be no room for the very ungracious me!

So today was good. The babies, I still refer to the twins as babies but they are definitely not. They are talking, expressing strong opinions, dancing, running, fighting, shoving things up other people noses, laughing, hugging, kissing.... They are amazing, but they are not truly babies anymore..... But they are my babies! So back to them, I love watching them. I love that they need me, my attention and love and they aren’t afraid to ask. Today they all did an amazing job of playing by themselves but then several times, mid-play, one or the other would stop what they were doing, call out for me, come find me, and want me to hold them, squeeze and kiss them, focus on them for just a few minutes and then they were content to run off and play again. Will they always do that? I hope so with all my heart. 

Mia is my little helper. She is such a sweet-heart and is using so many words. Daily her new words melt my heart as they spill out in her tiny sweet voice. Whenever it is time to head out the door and I ask the girls to get their shoes, Mia is the first to start handing out the shoes.  And she absolutely loves to get Daddy’s shoes out of the closet for him in the mornings as he is getting ready. Both she and Sonora have a Daddy routine thing that they have laid claim to and are devastated if they miss their chance to “help” Daddy in that way in the morning. Mia is in charge of his shoes and Sonora grinds the coffee and presses the start button on the coffee maker. Dark is the day that Daddy forgets to wait for Sonora and he pushes the button himself.... Dark indeed. 

Honnah keeps things stirred up and lively. I always thought that my life was lively before Honnah arrived on the scene but I was mistaken. It, however, is lively now. She loves to laugh and make others laugh. If everyone is playing happily she will go and rip the toy/baby doll/wooden spoon out of a sister’s hand and run squealing with it through the house, raising it triumphantly over her head while the offended sister runs after her squalling. And Honnah loves this- the action, adventure, element of danger when caught. She does this thing with her shoulders when she knows that she is being cute, I could watch her do it all day. She squenches everything up, shoulders, nose, cheeks, and her eyes just sparkle - she is full of it, that one! 

Sonora, a fabulous big sister and my right hand girl. I’m so proud of how she is learning important discipline lessons lately. We’ve hit the tattle stage and with two sisters entering their twos, she has much to tattle about. So I’ve tried to break things into steps so that she knows how to handle situations in which she is offended or in some way hurt or wronged. Instead of coming to me whining and crying, step one is to speak kindly to the offending sister. I’ve been proud to see her start to scream when something is ripped out of her hand and immediately stop herself and say, “Please don’t do that! Please give it back. Can I get you something else?” Now this hasn’t happened every time, not even close. But it has happened and it makes me proud. It gives me the encouragement I need to try this parenting business another day. 

I wish that I could tell you how much I love these girls and how I love the days and moments that I spend with them. I'm praying for so many more of those days and the gentleness and graciousness to be a better Mom as they are happening. 

Home Makeover-Shaunna Edition

          Just over a week ago, we had the privilege of hosting some of my dearest friends and their beautiful family in our home for a week. Matt & Shaunna are friends from college whom I have been so blessed to stay close to over the years (is it sad that I'm all nostalgic and sad thinking about the fact that it has already been years since we've graduated from college?!) Moving on, we had a delightful time, it was soul refreshing and it was worth the moments when all 5 children 4 years and under were crying and our house sounded like an orphanage. As always, Shaunna left her beautiful creative impression on me and this time, on our home. Because I have typed most of this with one hand while Mia wiggles and writhes in my arms and because Shaunna has done a much more beautiful job detailing the experience than I could (she took quite a few before and after pictures),  I will send you over to Shaunna's blog, Perfectly Imperfect here and here for you to see the crazy things that we did to our house and furniture. You need to know how very much I love my new look, and how grateful I am for a friend as generous, talented, beautiful, and creative as Shaunna. I think of you every time I admire your handy work around here, Sweet Friend, thank you!! Also, before you head over there, be prepared to stay at the her site for a while, you could (and in my humble opinion, should) spend hours looking through her blog posts at the amazing things that she has created out of old furniture, her home, and everything in between, they are breath-taking and inspiring. But even more than decorating, Shaunna will inspire you with her creativity (I keep using that word, you just wait until you've seen what I mean,) her energy and unstoppable work-ethic, and her deep love for her family and the Lord. I just love her and I know that you will too! Now go check it out, if you have a moment, and please let me know what you think!

Not Our Most Ladylike Moment

Many of you have been gracious in saying that you understand life with small children can be busy and unpredictable and you have forgiven my lack of  communication. But let me just tell you what exactly “busy and unpredictable” looks like. Tonight, for example, dinner was in a holding pattern, all three girls were playing happily, it seemed like the right moment to sneak into the other room and make a quick phone call. I needed to touch base with a woman whom I’ve never met but who is very generously allowing us to borrow strollers for the twins while we are on a trip that we will be taking soon. (This will save us from taking a double stroller along with the three car seats, suitcases, diaper bag, activity bags, and carry-ons that we are already taking on the plane!) 

So, I’m on the phone, leaving a message for a total yet sweet stranger when Sonora comes running into the room yelling something at the top of her lungs. I’m trying to wave her off and concentrate on what I am saying, while increasing the volume and realizing that I should wrap this message up soon. As I hang up, I realize that the last couple minutes of the message (I leave long messages) she could probably only hear whatever it was that Sonora was hollering. Speaking of, I think to myself, what was she hollering about? I tune in, just in time to realize that she is yelling, “Momma!!!! Mia is eating out of the toilet, Mia is eating out of the toilet, Mia is eating out of the toilet.....!!!!!” I take off running into the bathroom, sure enough in the mere minutes that I had left the room, Sonora goes potty (I’m still thanking the Lord that it was only number one), there is a huge pile of unrolled toilet paper on the bathroom floor, half of it is quite soggy, Mia is licking her lips with a suspiciously wet shirt front and Honnah has a handful of soggy toilet paper that she is swishing around in the used potty water. “Oh gross!!!” I manage to exclaim around the gag reflex. 

And that, is why it isn’t safe for me to call you....

This and That

In case you are still wondering, the snow has indeed melted, (really left you hangin' on that one didn't I?) Spring has sprung and it is just beautiful around here!

(Daddy, Mia, & the Cherry Blossoms)

Some people have asked me what my days looks like. Well here is a typical day, and we usually have a couple of those a week I'd say. One of the babies usually wakes up first (most often it is Mia) and we cuddle and play in bed until the other two are up. I keep a pile of baby toys beside our bed for just such an occasion.  When all three girls are up and it is more work to stay in bed than to get up, you know, with all the wiggling, squealing, breakfast requests, etc, we head to the kitchen to eat. Honnah and Mia are eating big kid food, in addition to nursing, so meal times are even more lively. We've been at this eating real food thing for about 6 weeks and I'd say that this past week was the first time that a meal went by without me getting their food in my hair. We had some bubble blowing issues there for a while. After breakfast everyone plays and generally entertains themselves for another hour or so until the first nap of the day. While the babies are napping Sonora and I usually have a little Bible time together or read books, then we each do our own thing for a while (I'm starting to get some cleaning done in this little window). Next babies start waking up, we eat lunch,  everyone gets changed, cleaned, pottied, then I have a precise order that everyone goes down for afternoon naps in order to maximize the window that I can catch a nap myself. When we are all up from afternoon naps we usually have a snack and then go outside for a walk or to play with our delightful neighbors. Then it is supper time, Daddy time, and time for the evening bedtime routines and rituals. Like I said, we usually have a couple of these smooth flowing days a week. This doesn't take into account our outings, play dates, birthday parties, women's weekly Bible study, small group Bible study with new friends at Church, special events, or general household insurrection.

(Honnah, the first to love big kid food)

(Mia, after an initial uncertainty, now endorses big kid food whole-heartedly)

(Sonora takes cup cake eating very seriously)

We all love being outside, even the babies. There is a really great bike trail near where we live that goes right down to the waters of the Chesapeake Bay and we spent one glorious day riding the whole trail with Sonora in a seat on the back of my bike and the little girls pulled in the double bike trailer on the back of Jon's bike. We stopped to picnic and to look at the water, it was a fabulous day.  Sonora loves pointing out the things in creation made by God, it warms my heart every time. We have the inevitable discussions about how God didn't make the mailboxes or the swing sets but He made the people and gave them the intellect and skills and materials to create those things...... I think that she is getting it.

(Honnah is not so sure about this safety feature)

(I found this vintage beauty at GoodWill for $15- the tricycle)

(Ready to roll)

Every week gets a little easier as all the girls get a little more independent and I have a smidge more energy. I am more grateful to the Lord than I could ever say for His rich blessings on us and His constant presence with us in the midst of this wild ride called our life! 

I'll try to do a better job of keeping everyone updated, but you've heard that before...... I'll leave you with a few more glimpses into our days....

(Feeding time at the Shaffer Zoo)

(Some sister time)

(It is so amazing to see them interact)

(Amazing and entertaining)

(Someone had a significant birthday lately and it could not have been any more special. Surrounded by family and friends, over a feast of authentic and delicious Chinese fare, turning thirty didn't even hurt!)

(My favorite girls)

About that Snow

I heard last night that the count for inches of snow that have fallen on us this season is up to 80. Thats an awful lot of inches. 

This just in - more snow expected for Monday. Seriously?

Bundled up and ready for snow (Honnah a little more ready than Mia)

Us lovin' the snow 

Our mailbox is under there

The view from our front door

My snow bunnies

A litte wagon ride in the snow (as uncomfortable as they look the babies both fell asleep)

Snow = Sonora's new favorite food

Taking a break from snow angel making

Honnah & Mia's preferred mode of snow travel - the jogging stroller

Taking a break from eating snow to lick an icicle

This is what we've been up to when we are inside thawing out....

Sweet Mia

Mia & Big Sis

Darling Honnah

Honnah & Big Sis

Convicted and Encouraged

I have lots of snow pictures to post as there is over three feet of snow in our front yard from the big storms that have come through. We've had a lot of fun playing in, eating, and in other various and a sundry ways enjoying snow! However, this post is not about that. This is a confession and the encouragement offered me by one of the wisest women that I know.

I'm going to share an email exchange that my Mom and I have had recently. This wisdom has so blessed me - I truly feel like a terrible weight was taken off of my shoulders. I lost burdens I didn't realize that I was carrying. I have mentioned to several friends that I would post these emails (with Mom's permission) because I feel like so many women (maybe especially moms) can relate.

You may be surprised to know that my mom and I can be a bit wordy (smile,) so consider yourself warned, this one will be long. If you only have time to read part of this then skip to my Mom's last email. It is full of godly wisdom and encouragement that I have been meditating on for days.

My sweet mother sent me this email out of the blue:

Dear Lisa,
     It has been a long time since we really connected.  I know my schedule is difficult to work around, and your little people need you almost non-stop, and I know you cherish the short time you have with your husband.  I'm not sure there is a solution.  But I want you to know that I am praying for you.
     I pray you are consumed with seeking the Lord and letting Him conform you to His image.  I pray that you see the constant sacrifices of self required by mothering as exercises in submitting the flesh and letting God's power flow through you to meet the needs surrounding you.  I pray you patiently and graciously discipline Sonora, inspiring her to be unselfish and cheerful, attuned to the needs of those around her.  I pray the Lord gives both you and Jon wisdom in understanding the seeds you are planting and insight into the harvest those seeds will reap.  May you not plant a single thought in your girls' minds that will cause them to look to the world and the flesh for satisfaction and contentment, but that they would know that true joy is only found in the Lord.  I pray you will find your Sabbath rest in Him, letting HIm carry the burdens of your day and enjoying His fellowship.  I pray your marriage will be infused with the love Christ has for His church and that his followers have for Him.  I pray you are fully content with the place in life that you have now, and that you will look for ways to encourage and instill a deeper love for Jesus in those around you.  The Lord is using the people and circumstances that you are in right now to accomplish His purposes in You.  Praise the Lord!
                                                                              All my much love, Mom


Boy do I need these prayers! My reply/confession/cry for help:


Dear Mom,

This is so beautiful and so much needed and appreciated. I feel out of touch with you and the world and do not like it, but the days are such a blur. I am a part of a Bible study on Genesis that is such a blessing right now and I have some projects around the house that I am excited about if ever there is opportunity to get to it. There are also a couple of friendships that I would like to pursue, again, when schedules work out. I do a lot of inner scrutinizing about being good parents, it always pushes me to pray. I just finished the book you gave me, "Don't Make Me Count to Three" and have ordered "Shepherding A Child's Heart." I've recommended the Ginger Plowman book to lots of folks, Christian and non-Christian, it has so many wonderful things to think on and practical ways to guide your children.

I am looking for ways to be thankful for Jon and the girls even more than I normally am, so that I will not be bitter. It feels like my natural state is to be negative and I hate it! Your true character comes out when you do not have outsiders to entertain or impress, huh? For a few years there I liked myself and my image and reactions and sweet spirit, etc. But I think that it is much safer to not like myself and depend on the Lord than to feel self-sufficient. I think that you understand, perhaps all full time moms go through it. It isn't that I feel unloved or unvaluable, I just get so tired of myself and my failed reactions, my failure to keep a clean home, and always have wonderful meals, my failure to know of and discuss world events. I get frustrated with my lack of creativity, and feel like I'm loosing my "competitive edge" whatever that is/was. I love my life and do not want a separate career, I am blessed beyond measure to be able to stay in this beautiful home with my amazing family and live my dream.... so why do I feel this way. I feel like I don't measure up, like other people do it better, and they do. I read these inspiring blogs about godly women who are creative mother's whose children are destined to be great and I feel like mine got a raw deal. And here come the tears.  

Here is more truth, I am so frustrated and self-conscious about the way I look (still overweight) but I have little motivation (read: energy and self-control) to change things (work out, eat less, etc.) I feel like I must not use my time well if the whole day and then week goes by and I can't fold a basket of laundry. There are too many days that I am so tired and weary and just want to be entertained and so I suggest dinner in front of a movie. I feel boring, too negative, and I do not laugh with my girls enough, or even step back and enjoy them enough. I keep wondering what the girls will be like when they are older and can do more for themselves and I know that I will miss these days, so there is more guilt. I'm afraid that I go back and forth in my head between cutting myself some slack because this truly is a crazy exhausting time for me and feeling guilty for not doing a better job of wife, housekeeper, mother, home cultivator, nurturer, example...... At some point the excuses have to stop and I have to kick it in gear, right?

There you have it, I told you I needed your encouragement. Thank you for sending it. On the other side, Sonora does her "Bible tudy" with her little Bible while I do mine, today I overheard her saying that "we worship the pink God," and we talked at length about why we do not worship people because only God is worthy of our worship. I praise God for these opportunities to talk to her about this stuff but at times I feel like it falls flat. Even today, I didn't think that I was explaining very well about worship and I felt like I was giving the right answers but not always feeling it, feeling in love with God. Although love is a choice and I choose to love Him above all things. Is it okay to not feel inspired or even excited when I teach her about God. What is my problem?

I'm sorry, this is probably way more than you wanted to know and certainly way more than I realized I had on my mind today (it is mostly subconscious) but it just spilled out. I'd love your thoughts and advice and please know again how grateful I am for your prayers!!! I have so much selfishness that needs working out and it is not pretty!

Thank you for always listening. More tears. I just read your email to me again and you have already answered much of this, I need to be consumed with seeking the Lord letting Him conform me into His image. My truest joy and rest are found in Him. I wish this truth was in pill form or smoothie. I do not do a good job of being ever aware of Him and listening. It is hard to hear much above the noise around here!

I'm afraid that I could write for hours on this pouring out my sinfulness and shallow heart. Fortunately for you, I'm needed by all three girls at this instant. I love you so very very much. Thank you for listening to me and still loving me.

Your,

Lisa

Mom's wise answer. She does such a great job of giving me some perspective on this time in my life while also holding me accountable and pointing me toward Christ:

Dearest Lisa,

    

     First, I'm glad you had me to dump on... and God hears us as we "confess your sins one to another," and He forgives and cleanses and helps us get our heads back on straight!

     Secondly,how well I remember all the thoughts and feelings you've mentioned--blurred days, no time to get to projects, relationships that lag, flat emotions when you contemplate God.  Although I think I tended to feel more sorry for myself and guilty because I was not doing something important that impacted the world, while you tend to blame and load guilt on yourself. 

     Please remember these very important things: 

• When breastfeeding, the top 20% of your energy goes to producing milk.  Since you are exclusively breastfeeding  two 5 1/2 month olds, it is probable that the top 40% of your energy goes to milk production.  Add in holding, changing, and keeping happy two babies, the intensive labor of a two year old, and a home, and you honestly don't have time to do much else.  You are fortunate to cook any meals and do any cleaning!  
• Try to get those standards that are stored in your head down to a doable level.  My level was too high and too intense.  Set reasonable goals for yourself that you can actually usually accomplish.  They will be lower standards now than in six months, and you can raise them more later.  I am down to getting laundry folded once a week myself.  I just have had to let up on some of my goals because I can't keep it all going.  I'm learning that is O.K.!  (Although it is embarrassing when people stop by!)
• I NEVER had the energy to do anything but take care of the essentials for the first six months of a baby's life (emphasis on singular baby).  Each of you were two before I had the energy to exercise or try to loose weight.  The children are the most important thing.  Do try to consume your calories on things that are adding to your health--enzymes from fresh fruits and vegetables, whole grains, etc.  Make your calories count by not eating junk, but don't berate yourself for not doing what you simply don't have time or energy to concern yourself with now. 
• This period of your life, as every period, is designed by God to help you realize the inadequacy and unholiness of your self so that you will give it over to God in exchange for His wholly patient, loving, and holy life.  (I obviously haven't accomplished this, so please understand that this is what God is teaching me, not what I've by any means mastered.)  I've spent way too many years trying to be self-controlled, diligent, and responsible, when God was waiting for me to ask Him to be those things in me.  Now when I need to clean, I pray the night before and ask God to give me the determination and energy to mop the next day, or clean out the refrigerator, or whatever.  He ALWAYS does!  I've come to realize that even these mundane chores aren't my problem, but He wants the burden cast on Him so we can spend our days praising His faithfulness instead of berating our inadequacies!  When I think it depends on me, I expend foolishly all this energy to try to make myself better.  God knows I can't be good, at least not consistently for more than a few minutes, and He is waiting for me to claim His good in me.  Oh, if I would only remember this consistently!  In short, we are sinners--selfish and weak and self-indulgent.  Jesus is perfect, and He has graciously consented to insert His perfect righteousness in our "temple" if we will clean it out and give Him room.  Purge your unholiness with confession and worship and invite Him in to carry the burdens of the day!
• I used to have a book about Self-Talk.  It was about the ways we think and evaluate ourselves all day long--this was good; that reaction was bad; I'm a good mother; I'm a bad mother.  We need to give that up.  We are always going to fall short of what we hope and dream for, and we will always feel negatively.  Let's engage in God-talk, where we ask Him for His feelings and thoughts and words and praise Him for the answers.  My self-talk is all about self.  No wonder I get depressed!  What a boring, self-inflated topic!  But focusing on God and others gets me over my myopia and onto people with real problems.  That is why reading the Voice of the Martyr magazines and persecution.com is so good for me.  Every week on our prayer night I am again brought up short by faithful people with REAL problems who are so joyful.  I whine about nothing of significance!  It convicts me every time.  (Isn't it said that a woman as old as I am still hasn't learned these lessions and has to be reminded EVERY WEEK!?!)
• You think about the future when it seems it will be easier.  Our selfish selves are always looking forward to times when we'll have less work, less demands, etc.  (Translated: more time to do what I want and indulge myself.)  That is the flesh.  Confess it to God and ask Him to fill you with desires for Him and His purposes for your life.  This Christianity thing is all about dying to self and being filled with His life.  God ministered to me with Romans 12:2 this week.  This version says, "In other words, do not let yourselves be conformed to the standard of this world.  Instead, keep letting yourselves be transformed by the renewing of your minds; so that you will know what God wants and will agree that what He wants is good, satisfying and able to succeed."  See, God has promised to work in us every day.  All we have to do is allow Him to succeed.  We don't have to muster up some great self-control or diligence.  We just need to give ourselves over to His mastery by putting our mind under His direction.  Stop the SELF-talk, and commence the GOD-talk!
• I know I should be well beyond you on all this and be able to give you wonderfully sage advice.  Unfortunately the truth is that I am in this with you.  I struggle with doing the same thing day after day with people who are neither grateful nor cooperative.  I spend my days trying to make children do what they don't want to do.  That is often what you are doing, too.  We long for it to be easy, and our subjects should at least be grateful!  But they are flesh, too, and their sinful, selfish selves dominate them just as ours do us.  Praise God that we have hope in Jesus Christ!
• See, your "melt-down" has helped me.  It has forced me to listen to my own advice, which isn't half bad, if I would just apply it!  At least it would be a step in the right direction.
• Here's the deal:  I'll be praying for you, and I covet your prayers for me.  More of Jesus, less of self.  Listening to His voice instead of whining our self-talk of guilt, berating, and failure.  Knowing that union with Him is the only true success.  Refusing to work ourselves up into a froth about what we need to do, but prayerfully giving our burdens over to the Lord for Him to accomplish in His time and way.  Our job will be to rejoice in His faithfulness!  Most of all, knowing that she who gives these little ones even a cup of water in His name has done it to Him!  We are blessed to spend our days serving Jesus--keeping Him clean and fed and safe and loved, instilled with love for God and good character, focused on using Life in a way that glorifies Him.  What a privilege!  What a divine calling!

I was so convicted of selfishness and trying to maintain perfection in my own strength. No wonder I was worn down - my own "perfection" is a lie straight from the enemy. I've spent the last several days confessing my weaknesses to Christ and asking Him to be perfection in me. I have felt so much more joyful, at peace, and even creative - because it has not been about me, but Him. I have so far to go but I am grateful for a God who will never leave me, who loves me when I don't like myself, and for a Mom who lives out her faith so beautifully and openly always pointing me to Christ!

The One About the Wedding (So sorry it has taken so long!)

First off, the bride. Natalie made a radiant bride and it was such a joy to watch her. She and her husband-to-be had purposed to save their first kiss until their wedding day and so not only was she becoming a wife, she was getting and receiving her first kiss. It was a marvelous kiss blessed by many cheering witnesses. I'm told that shortly after the ceremony and sometime during the reception the couple had already lost track of the number of kisses and were already improving their technique! Ah, newly weds! I absolutely love Natalie's husband and am thrilled to get to see him at all future family gatherings. William is wise, kind, loving, servant-hearted, very smart, a hard worker, has a great bass voice, and will most likely be famous someday. The Lord has blessed Will's faithfulness in the little things by giving him leadership over bigger things. He is the perfect fit for Natalie. 

Next up, my Mom, the beautiful competent, calm, cool, and collected Mother of the bride. When well laid plans got blown to smithereens (see story below) and everyone needed answers, directions, opinions, and advice, Mom rose to the occasion. On a normal day, she is wonder woman, on this day she was more. Mom calmly and kindly, with a smile, answered everyone who addressed her with a need from where to put the flowers, to the location of the iron, to which serving pieces to serve with which dish, etc. I was amazed by her pose and joy in the midst of chaos - great job Mom! You throw a great wedding!

The wedding festivities- wonderful, wild, memorable! I've never had a sibling get married before and was not prepared for the overwhelming emotions that hit unexpectedly. I was having a marvelous time bonding with my sister's in-laws-to-be, enjoying friends and family who had come for this blessed event, and trying to commit all details to memory - I knew it would go by fast. Then out of the blue I find myself sobbing through my entire rehearsal dinner speech (so sorry about that, Sis) tearing up at the drop of a hat in regular old conversation, and viewing the entire wedding ceremony through blurry wet eyes, trying to keep the blubbering to a minimum. I must be honest and say that there were times these past five months where I couldn't wait to get this girl married off, brides can be difficult to live with prior to their wedding. (Natalie - only a few times, the rest of the time you were delightful!) Nevertheless, even those moments of wishing the day would arrive did not prepare me adequately. I knew this moment was coming so I thought that I had my game face on - not so.

Perhaps the knowledge that she was moving so far away, perhaps the fact that she wouldn't be my right hand girl anymore, perhaps the fact that she was marrying a wonderful man who we all knew (know) will treasure her and love her as Christ loves His Church; perhaps those are valid reasons why I couldn't hold it together. It was an amazing event - holy, joyful, sweet, beautiful.

So that was my emotional state, on to the details....

Have you ever been married during a historic blizzard? Natalie has. We heard the storm warnings the day before, but the weather folks often misjudge precipitation and we just didn't take it too seriously. I least I didn't. It was quite cold the day before the wedding as we prepared the location - we were all pleased with how elegant everything was turning out. You know how you have great ideas in your mind but they don't always translate into a successful idea? Well this was not one of those, this idea (the decorating/preparation ideas) worked flawlessly! Beautiful silver serving pieces, chocolate fountain, room of framed pictures, photo montage movie screen, stair covering, sign arranging, sound system delivered, pipe n' drape, catering organized, changing quarters prepared, red draping, etc..... it was all working for us thanks to so many willing and generous people. This is important to know because all that work was almost a loss. Because of the vast amount of snow on the ground when we woke up, and the predictions of much more to come, the wedding was very nearly held in the hotel conference room. In fact the florist, and dear friend, who had driven through the night in the blizzard was starting to set up in the conference room when the plan was changed back to the original location after a couple of 4x4 vehicles had made the trip to gather supplies and found the route passable.

After a very scary, very white, drive from the hotel to the original wedding location we walked into what I imagine an ant hill looks like after having been stepped on, if you're an ant. There were people running hither, thither, yon, and back again. Snippets of conversations wafting around in the air sounded something like this,

"Have you seen an iron? Where's the florist? The photographer is ready. Where's the bride's mom? It was here yesterday, we ironed miles of red fabric. Hide the groom in that closet so the bride can walk by unglimpsed by him. The bride's mom knows. Where's the chocolate for the fountain? The cider is hot. The steamer isn't working have we found that iron? If you don't have a job go see the florist. Is there enough ting-ting in this bush? Go ask the mother of the bride....."

Months of time and many well crafted details sealed with lots of tears, and I mean lots of tears, was all upturned by one silly little blizzard. As the day began and my mom, my sister, and I gazed out of a hotel room window at all the cars buried under snow bright and early on the big day, trying to fathom where to begin Operation Make-the-Wedding-Happen-Today. I knew that this was going to be an exciting day; a memorable beautiful, pure white day. I just wasn't quite prepared for the melee (MELEE = a ruckus, a tumult, a commotion, a confused mass of people) that it would take to pull the whole thing off! There were so many servant hearted people, so many good attitudes and sweet spirits, and so many creative solutions. It was a wonderful melee, but a melee nonetheless.

I felt my mind going in so many directions up until the moment that it was my turn to walk down the aisle. Literally, the flower-girls who had been so cooperative moments before and who had rehearsed their parts flawlessly, now did not want to hold Alec's hand or walk in the general direction of the stage. A serious rebellion was brewing and it was too late to react, all available and essential personnel were not only in the wedding party but already in their spots on stage. I pleaded and promised all manner of things right up until I absolutely had to walk. I threw Alec a do-the-best-you-can look and turned to walk. Right then all the inner chaos quieted and I refused to focus on anything other than this perfect, holy event.

When I got to my place the flower girls and Alec were close behind me (great job, Alec!) and then the music changed. Natalie looked so incredibly, radiantly beautiful as she entered on our father's arm. Her dress was beautiful and she was just breathtaking. The size of her smile was second only to her soon-to-be husband. I've never seen a more blissful pair, it was beautiful to watch.

The ceremony was wonderful, as I mentioned, I shed a few tears. There was a congregational singing of "In Christ Alone" (an incredibly appropriate wedding hymn) that was so beautiful my heart just ached. There was a blessing given by the father's that again, caused the tears to flow. The whole thing was wonderful and peaceful and perfect. The only little snafu was when Sonora stole her Grandad's (aka- the bride's father's) seat while he was giving his blessing. When he tried to return to said seat she refused to budge. Had this not been the middle of a wedding ceremony that behavior would not have been allowed. However, as we all know, second only to rule number one about not upsetting the bride on her day, is rule number two about not upsetting the flower girl. So Grandad got bumped down to the end of the row (so sorry about that, Dad!) until the end of the ceremony when said flower girl returned to her spot beside Mom and Dad so she could follow Aunt Natalie and Uncle Will back down the aisle.

There are so many more things that I could share about this day, I have lots of great details stored away in my heart, however, I fear that this little story may never be posted if I don't bring it to a close soon.

Here are a few snapshots from that day, I can't wait until we get the photographers pictures back - there should be some doozies in there!

A little pre-aisle walking prep with a shoe box on her head - whatever works.

This is what I saw as I peeked outside during breakfast. This was just getting started. 

 Not sure why she was steaming her own dress,  I promise that we didn't let her do the whole thing! She had some incredible friends helping her prepare.

Every wedding needs a flower girl wrangler. Alec played his part well.

Munching on pretzels cleverly hidden in their flower girl baskets.

My sleeping baby beauties, weddings wear them out.

Lost those flower tiaras shortly after the ceremony was over. Found other fun flowers to play with.

The Mr. & Mrs.

Two of the happiest people I've ever beheld - ever.