what's my life??

if  you think fools me around make you happy, please keep do so...
if you think am kind enough to share my shoe with everyone else, you're totally wrong...
if you think am generous enough to share a man with my girl's friend, oh yeah! means you're to greedy to get...
if you think i can't live my life without you, well~you're totally dreaming....
if you think am waiting you to get me, maybe then....
if you think fucking around makes you happy, please continue to do so....
if you think you are fucking perfect to me, no, you AREN'T....
if you think you are smart enough. oh no~! you should put more effort to improve yourself....
if making my heart bleed make you proud, slash my heart into pieces is way better for me....
if you think i open my heart for you, then you should feel it with your heart to sense is that true....
if you think you have enough understanding towards me, please tell me who am i then rather i found myself out....
if you think when i keep tangle up with you is the only way i got, then you are totally wrong....
if you think i have a strong heart and i won't get tired, am tired, sincerely....
if killing my courage makes you feel more confidence, sorry, it makes me stronger....
if you thinks breaking me is the way you live your life, ooh~ try to do so...let's see what will happen to me...
if you think you torturing me enough, please proceed to the exit door in my life... i don't want a roller coaster ride, adrenaline goes high and mind working makes me exhausted, if that's is what you want from me that you earn your pride and that's enough for my life. no more shedding a drops of tears, no more spending a second, no more spare room for you in my heart that bear with the pain you threw to me. this is the only ends for me and the new chapter beginning of my life. there's nothing between us that worth for anything. for all what happened in the past make it a dust and ashes and blow it away.........because it don't worth anything else, even memory fade away sometimes when it don't  value anymore by anyone. missing or waiting is just wasting the precious time in the life. if there's no one know how to appreciate it then this person will not deserves anything from the one who give the love....

life with no regret...

dear y.,

I tell myself, I just wanna try hard for once, if no means we are end. I tried, now I live my life with no regret, I think you too. I takes all my courage just to make this try. Since it is not working, so we just forget about that. But, like what you said, we're besties forever and ever. The issues just let it pass. YOU and ME still live for each other life. Always wish the best for you like how you bring me through all the difficulties and always stay by my side whenever I need you the most. Am happy with my life because you exist and bring all the happiness and blissfulness to me. Am pretty glad I have you in my life. Now you should fight for what you want. May god bless you and am going to pray hard for you. Go ahead, I'll always by your side and give my support to the max for whatever decision you make and every step you take, I'll be proud for you. Love you forever. xoxoxo

-jo

dear bithchess

superficial? am thinking how superficial am i? for the first time this person said that i am superficial and not open minded. excuse me, please bare in mind that mine culture is different from yours. how open minded are you doesn't mean that i need to follow you. i live my own life and you live yours. sometimes you really make me felt that you are so annoying and Yes, you are definitely an ASSHOLE(you are the one who asking my opinion). your are selfish tooo~~~~~conclusion is although YOU realli drive me mad and make me felt so annoyed, but i still love you, like you and miss you all the way.





p.s: i miss bitchesssss~~~

等待........

等待原来那么的漫长，
等待原来那么的痛苦，
等待原来那么的煎熬，
原来等待长得像漫漫长夜，
等待让时间变得好慢，
让人觉得渡秒如年，
等待等于折磨，
磨碎了心，也苦了自己，
既然这样就不要浪费时间等待，
等待还不如实际行动............

What they said~

Problems ah problems~stay away from me can~!
You bothering me and make me freaking emo recently~
The problem I hate the most made me lost direction~
I asked my friends, what should i do,what their opinion?
The first, my family support me, say that I can try.....
The second person, my lil' sis asked me followed my heart~
What I answered was, what if my heart lie to me?
The third person, my lil' bro asked me just to give up~
I told him is too hard to let go~
The fourth person, my best friend told me the problem is not easy to solve~
I told her, I know about that, but I do not want to give up so easy~if there's no chance,then I just will give up~ I wanna fight for the chances~
The fifth person, my "si gong" asked me to followed my feeling~
What I told him was, what if my feeling also lie to me?

What should I do?
I felt tired if keep doubting~
But I'm the one who do not have the courage to ask you about it~
I'm really a coward~
What about you just say that "you do not have any chances, stop thinking about it!"
Maybe I'll feel more better~
Please just give me death sentence~
Just go ahead and break my heart~!

the truth~

The truth that is what you not going to tell me,
Is it so hard to tell the truth?
You making me hanging in the mid air~
If fly to high make me doubts about the happiness that I have now, whether it will just gone in a second,
If fall down now, I feel so reconciled about it~
What I gonna do now?
I felt so powerless....I feel like falling apart~
Tell me the truth is better than you cover up from me~
What if I discovered it myself, how sad I will be?
You make me lost the direction now~
What if I step out, will it be any negative changes between you and me?
What if I step back, can I just taking back all my feelings towards you?
I knew the truth early before, but it is much more better that come out from your mouth~
Anyway, I still wanna to keep going~give me some strength please, so I can make it better by my own and although fail I'll still happy to have you as my friend.....

YOU think I don't, but I do

I guess that you do not know that I maybe know everything about you
Actually I know more than what you may not expected me to know
Maybe you do not expected me to know, but m still know about it
I'm not that mind actually, I just follow where my feeling lead me
I admit that my heart broke into pieces when I noticed it
Although I guess it before, but I just do not want to believe that may be I'm right
But at last I found out....
I hesitated before whether am I still want to continue,
But the conclusion was I'll stood still where I am until I see that's no chances for me,
Then I'll give up~but not now....
I thought I can stop and take back all what I've give~
But I'm wrong,when the day I step out, is hard for me to step back anymore...
Just like my friends tell me that, you think you can stop just when you want it to be?
It is not so easy at all~ Love is not a thing that you can control and even when you want it to stop then it will stop for you, that's impossible~
So, I decided to wait, don't care how high I fall from, at least I had it before....

ღ ı ssıɯ n os ɥɔnɯ~¡ ღ