Turning Pages

How is it that when you are reading a really good book that you have no problem flipping the pages to speed through the words of the story just to know how it turns out, but when it comes the book of your life turning pages to find out what's next becomes such a thought-provoking, labor intensive, heart wrenching decision? Or sometimes the pages are being turned for you and you don't even notice until you take a break and look back at your progress?

I've come to a page that I know I have to turn it. I have to move on. I've read all of the words on this page. I've gotten used to them and have gotten comfortable with the same old boring paragraphs over and over again. It's time to push forward and see what's on the next page. Time to see where my decisions will take me. Stepping forward and moving on.

Heaven Blessed

I would feel horrible I didn't write a post about how I have been so blessed this past couple of weeks. Since the beginning of this semester I was pretty miserable. My schedule was so very busy and I had a lot weighing on my shoulders. My social life or the lack thereof started to get the best of me. I wanted to be happy really and I tried but I knew that I needed more that just my simple efforts. I need help from my Heavenly Father.

I worked my fanny off to get my temple recommend. When I got it I went to the Mt. Timpanogeous temple with my roommate and we had a great time. Since that weekend over Thanksgiving break, I have had an easier time in class, I've laughed more, I have had the great realization that I am surrounded by wonderful friends and I have had great communication with my family. Life has simply been good. This past weekend has been wonderful. I really haven't been this happy in a long time. I honestly truely believe that it is because I attended the temple and put the Lord before everything else in my life. I look forward to going back to the temple again so I can stay this happy. :D

Happy Holidays!!!

Happy Holidays Knucklehead!!!!

I'm so stinkin' excited for the holiday season! I love this time of the year. Not only are the lights prettier, smells sweeter, parties 'funner', friends kinder, drives longer, snow whiter, colors brighter, weather colder or songs lovelier but the service given is more heartfelt, more thoughtful and more Christlike.

I had the chance to go the Christmas Devotional and listen to the First Presidency talk. I loved Pres. Monson's story about the business man in the grey flannel suit that gives his seat on the plane to the young soldier that wanted to make it home before for he was sent to Vietnam. It was cool how that one simple act of kindness changed the whole mood of the people at the airport. I love how a small act of love and kindness can warm up the most wintry of rooms.

I have given myself the challenge to be a little bit more kinder, give a little bit more service and bring a little bit more of the Spirit where ever I go this holiday season.

Merry Christmas!!!

Honest, True, Chased by an Elephant

I simply have one thing to say.... I hate always chasing people and feeling like I'm not worth chasing.

Explanation: I hate it when you have a friend or two that always wants you to do stuff for them or come to them and they make a big stink about coming to you like it is a huge inconvenience. I would rather be stood up 100 times than have to deal with that type of friend.

I love my friends but when I have to be the one to initiate everything it gets a little tiring. A friendship is a two way relationship; both people give and both people take, not just one side giving all the time and not one person just taking all the time.

All I'm saying is think about how you treat your friends. Are you keeping them close or running them off?

Friends of Best

What in wide world of sports is a best friend?

This question has been plaguing my mind for the past while. All of the traits and actions that I perceived to be best friend material has be contradicted in every way by all of my "best friends". So my question is what makes a best friend?

Is it all of the many conversations that go on for hours? Is it all of the deep topics that are discussed during said conversations? It is the service that is given unasked for and at the drop of a hat? It is the small gifts and favors that are done for one another? Is it dropping by the house just to see if you are doing OK? Is it simple notes stuffed in your backpack saying, "Have a great day! I love you!"? Is it the late-night giggle fests? Is it jamming in the car to music and singing till your voice goes hoarse? Is it the shoulder and tissues that are offered when you are bawling and your make-up is running down your face? Is it the hugs and ice cream when a date has gone wrong? Is it the late-night/early-morning runs to the store for treats together? Is it the sharing of clothes, shoes and jewelry? Is it the crazy pictures together that get put up on the wall in a collage? Is it the countless inside jokes that any one had to be there in order to understand? Is it being together so much that people call you the wrong name? Is it the ability to communicate with one word sentences and simple facial expressions? Or is it all in the eyes of the best friendee?

This has been quite the puzzle to me. Is it possible to ever achieve the PERFECT Best Friend status? or do we all have flaws? Is there a best friend for everybody? If so who am I supposed to be a best friend to? Is it OK to have a lot of friends that are the best? Because I have a lot of those. I just cannot figure this out. I hope that I will be able to sort out this muddled mess.

My Angel

Over the course of the past few days I have had different experiences that have made me feel lonely. I love my roommates; they are such sweet girls. Our relationships are still new and I'm not quite sure how much of myself to share with them. In time we will grow closer together I'm sure but I'm a little lonely here in my apartment and normally I would turn to my other friends but alas the majority of them are on their missions. This too, is a good thing. There is no where else in the world that I would want these friends to be other than on their missions. But sometimes letters and emails can only keep you company for so long.

Then I have my dear sweet best friends. I told them not to forget me. They live together in a great apartment complex with a lot of fun people and I miss playing with them and I didn't want them to have so much fun and get too busy to still play with me. I have gone over and I text them frequently but I feel like I'm the one making the effort. They forget to invite me when they are doing fun stuff. Inviting myself over in not the way I was raised but it feels like that's what I have to do. Monday I was excited to go over and give my 'Best Friend Seal of Approval' on an outfit that was to be worn on a date. As the night progressed it seemed to me that my approval wasn't valued at the best friend status; someone else had a better opinion than I did. Also, I was informed of a new blossoming relationship had started with one of my friends and a neighbor. I'm happy for her, I really am, but I'm very heart broken that I was not told by her. I was told by someone else and I felt like she was trying to keep it a secret from me. Over all, that night I felt like I had been replaced. They don't need me around to have fun, they don't need my opinion, and they apparently don't need me to know their good news.

Anyway, because of these events I have been feeling a little down about my social situation. Well, Tuesday night I had a study session with a sweet girl from my health class. We had fun studying and planning our lessons together and we got to a point where we were chatting to each other about life and such. I opened up to her about how I was feeling about my friends and my social status. She was so sweet and kind. She totally understood and gave me great tips on how to gain control of myself. She said that I should focus on becoming comfortable in my own skin and accepting who I really am and celebrating that. She taught me about how she organizes her time and what she has done to feel good about herself. I just felt the warmth of her friendship and she answered so many of my questions. I know that I'm supposed to work with this sweet girl in this health class because she has so much to offer. I felt that she has been my angel. Bless her heart for listening to me and being willing to talk to me. So for the next few weeks I'm going to try the tips that she gave me. I hope to find a new strength within myself. I want to be able to say, "This is who I am and I like it. I don't need wait for others to make me happy because I am happy with myself."

Spooky

YAY! It's October!!!! I'm so excited! I look forward to Halloween all year long. I love the leaves changing color, the chill in the air, the rain, the candy corn, the cute kids dressed in their creative costumes, the giant bowls of candies waiting for trick or treaters, the spooky and scary decorations, the carved pumpkins on the porch steps, the Halloween Oreo cookies, the old school scary movies, the carmel apples, the Halloween school songs the kids are singing, the candy, the costume parties, the candy, the haunted corn mazes and haunted houses and of course the CANDY!!! I have such a dang sweet tooth! I am going to stay away from the candy the best I can this Halloween. But everything else about Halloween is just so much fun and so exciting. I love planning out what I'm going to dress up as every year.



I'm sad because for the past couple of years I haven't had a good reason to dress up. We don't get trick or treaters here at college and when I go home to AF we don't get many visitors there either. I have made the decision that when I grow up and have a house I am going to have the coolest scariest house on the block and we will be the ones with the COOL candy and prizes. Plus if I'm going to go all out for the holiday I must have a party.



I know that Halloween is clear at the end of the month but I am just so excited!!! Happy Haunting everyone!

Out With The Old, In With The New

Oh my shining stars! School is now upon me. I can't deny it, I can't hide from it, and I certainly can't ignore it. I've been ready for school to start for months now. I'm so happy to be back in class learning and enjoying the atmosphere. I love being in a college town with so much going on. I'm also ready to get going on homework. I know it sounds weird but I actually like having work to do. I like to stay busy.

I do have to say that I am certainly ready for this semester... well maybe not all the way ready but I'm getting there. I am taking 18 credits this semester which keeps me so dang busy all of the time. (Note to self: this is a good thing.) I also am serving in the Institute Women's Association as the Secretary of the Zarahemla chapter which also keeps me busy. (Also a good thing.) I have brand new roommates that are as sweet as pie and I'm trying to spend time with them to get to know them. (A very good thing.) We don't have Internet at our apartment right now so I spend all my days up on campus at the computer labs studying and what not. (Good thing.) And every morning I get the task of walking up the hill to catch the bus to go up the bigger hill or I walk up the giant hill to campus which gives me an asthma attack and I pass out and I become sore and I think I'm going to die and I become healthier.....(Well, this is supposed to be a good thing.) Well, there is just so much to do and absolutely no time so I'm going to get back to doing my homework and quit lolly gagging!!! :)

P.S. Yay for Aggie Ice Cream!!!

Sliming Alliteration

Two words: Weight Watchers

Today my mom and I joined the great Double W. My mom has gone before and has had great success and I figure that it is time to get my life in gear and start making healthier choices. My ultimate goal right now is to lose 50 lbs. But my short term goal for right now is to lose 10 pounds before I move back to Logan in about 5 weeks. I really think I can do this and I've very excited to be apart of such a successful program. So good luck to me! :D

I just thought it would be appropriate to post a couple of "Before" pictures of what I look like now so when I look back and I can say, "Dang, I used to look like a bloated water-retaining sea cow! And now look at me! I look good!" :D

I know that Britt and Lacey are already pretty small girls but in this picture I'm as wide as both of them together. Well, no more 'Sister WIDE LOAD'!

All my roomies have such perfect curves and healthy bodies. Soon, I won't be afraid of having pictures taken next to these cute girls! :D

I'm very excited to start on my journey. So here I go, one small step at a time.

Little Miss Muffet

I have a new roommate. He is a spider.

Last night I was laying in bed when I saw a spider dash from my pillow to my laptop that was lying next to me. The lights were off and I wasn't quite sure what I saw, so I turned on the light and checked under my laptop to see if I could see it. I didn't see any sign of life so I turned off the light and laid back down trying to calm myself. I looked over again and I saw something black and about the size of a quarter rush from beneath my laptop down the side of my bed racing on the edge. I flipped on the light again and I thought I saw it run either under my covers or between my mattress and the box spring. By now my heart was racing and I was WIDE awake!

I grabbed one of my flip flops and started shaking my covers to see if I could spot the monster. I never found him. I set the flip flop next to my bed on the floor for the next time I would see him. I dimmed the lights really low just in case he decided to come out. I put on my long socks also in case he wanted to come out and have an early morning snack... ME. I pulled the blankets up to my neck and went to sleep after getting my mind and heart to stop racing.

Next thing I know the yarn ties on my quilt and my hair started tickling my face. I FREAKED! It scared me so bad! I thought the spider was running across my face! Just the thought of it is DISGUSTING!!!! Ugh! So I couldn't handle it. I grabbed another blanket and pillow after shaking them out and checking for my unwanted guest, I went down stairs and slept peacefully on my couch.

I'm sorry, but I just don't like spiders. They creep me out too much. I spent most of today trying to find my new roomie but he was no where to be found. Part of me is trying to be brave and not freak. Another part of me is horrified. Every tickle or rush of air from the ceiling fan sends me into a panic. The last part of me thinks I'm crazy because I never actually saw the creature in the light. I could have been a shadow or some hallucination of sorts. Whatever really happened it has really scared me. I'll be on edge from now until I find the fiend or I move away to college where I will have to deal with other parasites. ;)

Rest assured that I will never watch Shelob the giant spider from the Lord of the Rings and Aragog from Harry Potter. I REFUSE!!!

Shaken Situation

I'm scared. Terrified really. I see the big picture and I understand the wonderful opportunities that lay ahead for me but that still doesn't assuage my fear.

I love school. I love being in class with a set schedule, learning and expanding my mind with new facts and information. I love the social part of being on campus people watching and seeing my friends. I love having that one good friend who is there when I need them and there to listen to my long list of To Do's. I love reading the texts and the materials searching for the deeper personal meaning. I love having assignments or work to do and staying busy. I love getting ready in the morning and looking my best for the people I'm about to meet. I love being on my own and taking care of myself.

I love school, but this year it's different. I'm excited to go back to Logan and live in the Anderson Apartments. One of my really good friends and I were going to room together. I was very excited for the fun things that we had planned out. Our schedules were going to be the same. We were going to study together, play together and we even had callings together. I was very excited to have someone that I know and trust live with me. She did some thinking and some research and found out that it would be a better choice for her to stay home and attend UVU. I support her decicion 100%. She knows where she needs to be and I'm not going to stop her from making her choice.

But.... now I'm scared. Now I'm going to be living with other girls that I have never met. I don't know if they are LDS or where they come from. I don't if they are older than me or if our schedules will be the same. I will be doing all of my studying on my own and I will be doing my calling with brand new women as well. I'm afraid of being alone. Sure, I can see the big picture.... "This is a great opportunity to meet new people and exercise getting out of my shell." I've heard it all before. I just don't know if I can do it on my own.

Not only do my worries consist of social issues but financial and academic issues as well. I have NO MONEY!!! The small summer jobs that I have are not enough. They will only buy me gas for my car. I'm just so concerned on how I'm going to make it. I also want to go to school this next summer but I don't know how that all is going to work. I would love to move to Logan permanently I just don't know when that will happen and how it will all work out.

I guess I'm just shaken up about my new situation that it is causeing me to ask more and more questions. I'm scared and nervous and anxious and I just need some time to think, regroup and ask for encouragement.

THINGS THAT I LOVE

1. Playing Name-That-Tune with my dad
2. Drinking Coke
3. Everything M*A*S*H
4. Birthdays
5. Getting my hair cut or colored
6. Eating Wheat Thins for a snack
7. Watching the rain fall
8. Taking pictures then photo shoping them
9. Having my picture taken
10. Eating with friends and family
11. Singing songs
12. Quoting movies
13. Playing all games
14. Facebooking
15. Massages and having my back tickled
16. Sleeping in
17. Camping in Coalville with my family
18. Swimming with my neice
19. Watching TV with my dad
20. Blowing bubbles
21. Going to school
22. Teaching a class
23. Buying school supplies
24. SHOES!!!
25. Talking on the phone with a good friend
26. Playing with animals
27. Making blankets
28. Visiting with Grandma Carter
29. Giving hugs
30. Laughing so hard my stomach hurts, my cheeks hurt, I snort and I about pee my pants. :D
31. Slurring my words like Sid the Sloth
32. Going to the movies
33. Watching shows on my laptop outside like a drive in movie
34. Riding on the back of the Goldwing
35. Driving the Trike
36. Any type of traveling (By plane, car, motorcycle, boat, ect.)
37. Going to church
38. Singing Hymns
39. Eating ice cream
40. Playing tetris
41. Learning family history
42. Reading good books
43. Babysitting
44. Taking a walk and just chillin' in nature
45. Four wheeling
46. Shooting guns
47. Giving someone flowers
48. Making someone feel better
49. Learning how to cook new dishes
50. Thanksgiving AND Christmas
51. Throwing a softball around
52. Holding on to balloons
53. Jewelry
54. Filing and oranizing
55. Planning and organizing activities
56. Making cards with my sister, aunt and cousin
57. Writting to missionaries
58. Going to plays and performances
59. Walking for exercise
60. Finding solutions
61. Cowboys and rodeos
62. Riding horses
63. Going to the zoo
64. Listening to water in a river, fountain, waterfall, ocean, ect.
65. New clothes
66. Making lists
67. Creating art pieces
68. Collecting key chains and fortunes from fortune cookies
69. Picking and pressing wild flowers
70. Visiting historical church sites
71. Doing the Noodle Dance with the Gurney girls and Meika :D
72. ELVIS PRESLEY
73. Going to dances
74. Coloring pictures
75. Listening to my record player
76. Sitting out on the deck just chillin'
77. Putting pictures in the perfect picture frame
78. Re-decorating my house
79. Baking cookies
80. Finding a bargain
81. Listen to my dad change the words to songs
82. Volunteering at my mom's work
83. Living on my own
84. Going to the Thursday night movie under the tent with my cousins for Alpine Days
85. Having contacts and not cheesey glasses
86. The Dollar Store
87. Talent shows
88. Taking a cool shower on a hot day and taking a hot shower on a cold day
89. Puddle jumping and playing in the rain
90. Snowball fights
91. Listening to music while getting ready in the morning
92. Going to bed early and waking up semi early
93. Drawing with sidewalk chalk
94. Going to an Aggie Basketball game or Aggie Hockey
95. Walking in the grass bare-footed
96. Watching natural disasters
97. Playing the piano and the trumpet
98. Playing in the ocean
99. The smell and feel of clothes that are right out of the dryer
100. Carol Burnett, Smother's Brothers, Laugh-in and other old school funny stuff
101. Retro shows like: Happy Days, Leverne & Sherley, Mork & Mindy, Hogan's Heros, The Monkees and others
102. Learning about other cultures
103. Going to the musem
104. Studying about wars in history
105. Quotes, books, songs or movies that make you think
106. Weird weather
107. Stargazing
108. Watching a campfire and singing songs
109. Ah-ha! moments
110. Having a deep conversation
111. Finding songs with names in them
112. Holding hands
113. Seeing a good hockey fight
114. Hearing stories about my grandpa's
115. Cheesey, corney jokes!

I can't think of any more right now but there are lots more that I haven't listed. Most of all I love being Just Necia! :D

Singled Out Single

I am single.
I've wanted to be a princess and just sit around and wait for Prince Charming but that got boring. I wanted to put myself out there and go find a man but I couldn't find a man with my standards. I tried looking in my singles ward, there are good guys there that are wonderful; problem is, they are too old. I've been looking but I'm afraid for now I will just stick to the mysterious man that seems to show up in my dreams. I don't know who he is or what he looks like but I know he's for me. So I will slip back into sleep and meet up with Mr. McDreamy.
I'm still single.

I am a Mobile Army Surgical Hospital

Since I was just a baby I have been attached to the television show M*A*S*H. I was not a horrible child but I would cry at night and my dad would rock me until I fell asleep. My dad would cradle me in his arms, pull up the rocking chair and turn on the TV to M*A*S*H. I would quiet down when the opening credits started. (You know the one with the two helicopters.) And I wouldn't completely fall asleep until I heard the ending credits, by then I was out like a light bulb. To this day, it is always soothing to me to hear choppers whirring and the tune of "Suicide is Painless" playing.

Now some may say that I have become obsessed with M*A*S*H, and who ever says that is not lying. But not only is it an obsession, it has become apart of me and who I am. Sure it's fun to show off my collages, my trivia book, my Martinis and Medicine collection, all of my seasons in the box sets, my computer backgrounds, my M*A*S*H over the shoulder bag and everything else related to M*A*S*H that I've collected or made; but what really means the most to me is my personal connections to each of the characters. I have found that in some way or another I act, feel or say things just like every one of the doctors and nurses...

Captain 'Hawkeye' Peirce: Like him, I hate war. I hate that fact that brothers, sons, fathers, friends and neighbors fight against each other. Sure, I love to learn the history of wars that are past but in reality, fighting is senseless. More peace, Less war. Hawkeye, never discriminates because of race, gender or religion or whatever. I believe that a person is a person and they should be treated as a valued human being. Also I'm like Hawkeye because I love to tell corny jokes or funny quips. Sometimes my defence against stress is to goof off, and sometimes it can get me into trouble. :D

Captain 'Trapper' John McIntyre: Trapper is also a joker and he's there to help Hawkeye with his pranks on Frank. Unfortunately, Trapper's short role within the TV series was to play the sidekick of Hawkeye, but he did a great job at it. I have noticed when someone is on a roll I can't help but jump in and add some of my own jokes or help with practical jokes. I don't mind being a sidekick sometimes.

Captain B.J. Hunnicutt: B.J. is the all time family man. He cares so much for his wife and child that he makes decisions to stay faithful to them the best he can. He also is a silent prankster. He will pull a prank on someone and sit back and act like he knows nothing. I love my family. I want to be able to be with them for eternity. When I'm away from my family I miss them very much. I don't have a husband yet but I want to be faithful to him right now as much as I can. And again, I'm a joker. I love a good prank. (Especially on my mom :D)

Colonel Henry Blake: Henry is silly and goofy. He is always mixing up his words and phrases and just goofs off. BUT, when it comes down to making a decision he makes it with his heart. His patients come first and he genuinely cares about the people he works with. I like to be silly and goofy too, but I can tell when I need to be serious and I love my friends and family very much and I want to make the best decisions to help them.

Colonel Sherman T. Potter: Col. Potter is also a great family man. He knows how to take authority but not over-do it. He gives commands but he also knows when to relax the reigns. Throughout the series he becomes kind of a father figure for everyone in the camp but he also keeps a great bond of friendship with everyone. I'm going to become a teacher someday and I feel that I can be authoritative and bold but also know when to have fun. I love being in a presidency in my church calling because I love to be able to look over people and be able to take care of them. I love my friendships and I want to keep them close.

Corporal 'Radar' O'Reilly: Radar can sense things before they happen. He knows what others are going to say or do. He's the company clerk and he can keep everything in order and working well, although it may be in his own system, he gets the job done. He is also an animal lover. He has Guinea pigs, rabbits and even skunks. Also, Radar is very modest. He sort of innocent and he hates to be naked in front of others. Unlike Radar, I can't always tell what someone is thinking or going to do next. I do, however, like to stay organized in my own little way. I get in and get the job done. I also love animals. I have had many pets in the past and I would like to be able to have a home with a yard big enough to have pets for my kids to play with. Like Radar, I am very modest as well. I always have on two or more shirts and long pants no matter if its 10 degrees outside or 100 degrees. :D

Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger: Klinger, Klinger... where do I start? Klinger wants to get out of the army so badly that he wants to be declared crazy and released with a Section 8. He tries to accomplish this by dressing in women's clothes. Well, throughout the series Klinger keeps trying but once he becomes company clerk he has other things on his mind. He is a scrounger. He can get whatever you want for a great price. He's always trying something new and he's very creative. No, I'm not trying to get out of doing chores by claiming that I'm crazy but I do like to try new things. I want to learn different trades and have different experiences. I also love a good bargain. I like to trade and barter for things.

Major Frank Burns: Otherwise known as 'Ferret Face'. Ha ha!!! Although Frank is super annoying and whiney, he is a very patriotic person. He does do and say some pretty dumb stuff. I do have to admit that I do and say stupid things quite often. Sometimes I can sense how dumb I sound or annoying I may be at times. I am also a very patriotic person. I love our country and the freedoms that we have here. I am so lucky to have been born here and I haven't had to worry about hiding my beliefs. I love living in the U.S. of A.!!!!

Major Charles Emerson Winchester III: Charles is a very proper person. He minds his manners and is very professional. He does a superb job at what he does as a surgeon. He loves classical music and appreciates classic literature. Although he is highly educated, his big head gets in his way. I love to be professional and I cannot express how important manners are to me. A simple please and thank you can go so far. I also want to be able to be the best at my job. I want to be the perfect teacher. I also have found a love for music. I play the piano and the trumpet. There are no words for how grateful I am to be able to play and hear music. Music is my way of being able to express myself and when I hear certain songs they carry certain memories with them, whether they be good or bad. But I also can have my arrogance get in the way. I become prideful and I need to be humbled.

I saved the best for last....

Major Margaret Houlihan: I personally feel like I am most like Major Houlihan. I have watched her grow from true khaki, regular army brat who was in love with a lipless wonder to a strong-willed, hardworking Major who also knew how to be a liberated woman. She knows her duty and she tries her best to fulfill it even if it means being ridiculed for sticking to the book. But she is not always so hard nosed. She has a soft side where she is a caring, warm, sensual woman. She has gone through a lot of heart ache with men, family and friends. In the beginning she seems immature and inexperienced but as the series continues she learns and grows to have experience and she learns to have a certain outlook on life. When my obsession with M*A*S*H started I was only 15 years old. I didn't know what love was, I didn't know what it meant to stand up for my beliefs and I didn't really know who I was deep down inside. I'm not saying that now 4 years later that I've figured all of that out but I feel that I have learned and gained new incites to myself just like Margaret. I love to follow rules. Rules and guidelines are set to help keep us safe but I also know when a rule can be broken for a greater good. I have learned to stand up against the crowd and stand for my beliefs and standards. I have learned what it means to have integrity. Like the Major, I also have a soft side. I have the part of me that wants to be loved by someone very special who will stand by me with the same goals and help lift me up. I want to love someone back and give them everything. I have learned that a love like that will take some time to find but when I do it will be worth it. I have changed friends and have had my share of family drama. I look up to Major Houlihan and how she is always working on who she is and trying to do her best and staying true to herself.

Not only do I connect with the main characters but I connect with one special extra character...

Nurse Kellye Nakahara: She is so sweet. She is always ready with a quip or a joke. She has one of the sweetest smiles I have ever seen. She has a scene with Hawkeye where she tells him how she is overlooked and how great she is and what people are missing out on. I too, sometimes feel overlooked by guys, friends and family but I also know that I'm a good person. I do have a healthy self-concept. I'm warm and sensitive like she is and I do have a lot of talents. People just need to see me and see what I can do.

Although I may seem to be a lot of people at one time, I really am just all of them rolled into one person. I don't try to put on different faces or try to be someone who I'm not. I just have many components that make up who I am. Sometimes I feel crowded by the many roles that I play and sometimes I feel lonely like I don't play any role at all but no matter what I will always be myself; experiencing, growing, learning.

I'm just Necia.

Roommates

I just wanted to spend a little time giving a little description about each of my roommates. :)

First, Alaura: Alaura and I have been friend since elementary school. Despite her moving to different schools during our childhood and teen aged years we have still been able to remain good friends. I'm so glad that I was able to move to Utah State with her. It was just comforting to move with someone I know to a new and strange place. One of the many things I love about her is her love of different cultures and religions. She also knows a lot about food from other countries and she likes to cook them and share them with us. She loves music! She is always singing or whistling. We have a ton of fun when we go on our Cafe Rio runs. :D I'm grateful to have her and her strong testimony in my life!

Brittany: My dear sweet Britt! She has the cutest smile that is so contagious!!! She never stops smiling, even when she's mad! She is a master at playing Mario on her old school Nintendo. She never ceases to surprise me with the funny things she does when no one is watching such as, flipping over the side of the couch or playing lacrosse in our living room with the door closed. :D She just makes me smile! I'm so glad that I got the chance to travel all the way down to Blanding and back with her. Ha ha! And I will never forget how she carries her camera EVERYWHERE! She would even leave it on the top of the fridge just in case something funny was happening! I truly have been blessed by her never ending happiness. :D (OH! And my Tetris buddy!!!! Hahahaha!! :) :P :) :P)

Aubrey: Aubs A-Baubs!!! I love her laugh!! When she gets laughing pretty hard she has one of the cutest laughs ever! She makes me giggle! I have enjoyed so much listening to Aubs tell me all of her stories about meeting Devin, her boyfriend who's on a mission in Hong Kong, and about high school friends and more. I guess I have to admit that I was slightly intimidated of her and Lacey at the very beginning of the school year. Aubrey is just so cute and she is fun and she just never seemed to do anything wrong. I wanted to be like her so bad. Now I'm not intimidated (as bad :D) but she's still as cool. I love having our little chats and reading quotes from our quote boards. :D I'm so blessed to have her in my life. She really is a wonderful example to me.

Lacey: My beautiful Lacey Bottoms! :D I love to get hugs from her. She'll just come up to me and start leaning on me. I totally love it. Lacey is a talented seamstress. She went home one weekend and came back with a bunch of pillows and a blanket that she had made for her bed. They are so cute and she did it all in one weekend! I have also enjoyed coloring pictures with her and Aubrey. Like I said I was a little intimidated by her and Aubrey only because they just seemed so perfect (which they still are!) Lacey has such a big heart. She never wants to be mean or rude, but it is super funny to watch her pretend to be rude like at one of our FHE nights. :D I always loved the chances that I had to have lunch with her. We would sit there and chat. She gives great advice. She and Aubrey gave the rest of our apartment the Yoga bug. :D I love my Lacey.

These are my roommates and I hope that I will be able to stay in touch with these sweet angels. I love you girls!!!

Winding Down & Looking Back

Today I had my last real class. I'm getting ready for finals for next week. I've started packing my things up and I'm getting ready to go back to good old American Fork. *Sigh* I really am excited for the summer and all of the fun things that I have planned. My list of activites for the summer keeps getting longer and longer. It will be nice to just work and not have to worry about homework. Also, my really good friend, Elder Eric Fugal is returning from his mission. I can't wait to see him and be able to spend a little time with him. But to every sweet side there comes the sour. I have to say goodbye. I have gained some valuable relationships this past school year. I love these people and it's not like they are dying and I will never be able to see them again. There is Facebook and I'm grateful for it but it's not the same as living with your best friends.

When I got to college I had dropped all of my high school friends because of different interests and I only had a select few people that I was really close to. Completely starting over was intimidating. I had to really put myself out there and learn who I wanted to be. By doing that I have been able to welcome many people into my life. My roommates Alaura, Aubrey, Lacey, Brittany and even Autumn have all touched my life and have helped me become who I am. They have been there for me when I needed a shoulder to cry on, a friend to laugh with and a sister to bond with. All of them carry the spirit with them and they are all trying to live the gospel. I look up to each and every one of them and I want to become like them. I love those girls with all my heart and I will carry their friendships with me where ever I go.

Not only did I become close to my roommates but other people in our building. The boys next door, Brant, Dane, Marcus, Randon, Jon and Chris, were always there to provide entertainment. They have been kind and caring. I have had the opportunity to hear each of their testimonies. Each one is golden. I've been blessed to live by such great young men. I have also become really close friends with Will and Chris from upstairs. Will has been fun to play around with. We have had great times laughing at dumb jokes and late night Wal*Mart runs. Chris and I have been able to have many laughs as well. I love to hear his stories about his dad's business and all the fun that happens in Idaho Falls. We also have had great times playing games or watching House and Leverage. I have enjoyed many, many talks and chats that have lasted until two or three in the morning and even pulling an all nighter with Will and Chris. The girls directly across the hall and the boys kitty corner across the way have also been really fun to get to know. I will always remember the practical jokes, loud music and Jessica studying out on the couch. I would feel awful if I forgot to mention Greg, Steve and Chaise. I loved hanging with them playing Halo or reading the quotes on the big blue wall. What wonderful people I have been surrounded by.

I knew that there was a reason I needed to come to Utah State and live in Jones Hall. I have been given the chance to walk away from this experience with my head held high knowing that I have become a better person because of the great people I have been touched by.

Goodbye Jones Hall.

Hoppy Easter!

For the first time in my life I was not with my family for Easter. It was sort of a bitter sweet holiday. It was sort of sad not being with my family but on the upside I had so much fun with one of my close friends, Tawnette. I also had the wonderful opportunity to focus on the reason why we celebrate Easter. I had a chance to think about my Savior and all that he did for me, for all of us. I didn't really think about the Easter Bunny or about candy too much. I was too focused on having fun and my Savior, Jesus Christ.

Tawnette and I had lots of fun going to dances, shopping, tanning, making dinner, dying eggs, studying, going to church, hanging with friends and doing an Easter egg hunt. We had so much fun and we laughed a lot. I loved going to church with her because they had some really great speakers and the Relief Society lesson was amazing.

I also felt so inclined to watch the movie called "Finding Faith in Christ". This movie was about how we find faith and about who Christ was and what he did on the Earth. It also talked about the Resurrection. I love the spirit that the movie invites. I can say that by watching that movie and studying Christ's life in the scriptures has really built my testimony. I can say and love to say that I KNOW that Jesus Christ LIVES. He was resurrected and he has a body just as real as you and I. I love my elder brother, Jesus Christ for all that he did for me and the rest of the world. I'm so greatful for the Atonement and the role that it plays in my life. I say these things in the name of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.

Happy Easter!

Boxed In

I don't understand why people pidgeon-hole each other. Whenever I try something new or do something that I wouldn't normally do I have people tell me that they would never see me doing stuff like that or they tell me that I shouldn't and it's just a waste. I tried longboarding and loved it. I plan to continue to do it. I have only gotten grief from people who say that they could never see me trying it. I also have gone tanning once. Many people ripped into me about skin cancer and stuff. I'm not dumb! I know I'm asking for skin cancer but I just wanted to try it ok! I also dyed my hair darker and I've just gotten weird stares. Am I really that extreme? I don't think I am. I guess that I just want my friends and family to respect my choices of trying new things and I want to be seen as a person that isn't afraid to try new looks, new activities or meet new people. I do have a reason behind my madness. I want to at least try new things because when I'm a teacher I want to be able to talk to my students about thier likes and dislikes and be able to understand why they like something or at least have them feel like I care enough to try something that they like and that I care about them. And now for my next trick: YOGA!!! I'm pretty excited for it. I've only heard positive things about yoga so I don't think I'll hate it. I'll never know unless I try it!

H-I-P-P-O-T-A-M-U-S

I am sad. I have come to the embarrassing realization that I CAN'T SPELL! I use to be a great speller and I have always done well with grammar and punctuation. I have been having a horrible time at trying to remember how to spell words and how to use commas and such. I blame all of my troubles on the information overload that I'm getting from college that turns my brain to mush. Honestly though, I thought schooling was suppose to help you learn to spell better?! I just don't know anymore. Well, I do want to apologize for any spelling, grammar and punctuation errors that I have made and all that I'm going to make. Let's just hope that I can get my spelling skills back BEFORE I become a teacher!

Biffs, Bike, Baby and Byes

Alright then, I've got a couple of new stories this time. First of all, I got to try riding on a long board and I loved it but one day I was on a slight hill and totally biffed it. I hyper-extended my right knee and sprained my right ankle as well. It hurt a lot and I had quite the limp but now it's getting better. It's still stiff sometimes though.

I had a wonderful, glorious, fantastic Saturday this past weekend. I got to go with my dad and the TRA group down to Green River on the brand new Goldwing trike my parents bought. We went to Ray's Tavern for a big fat burger. It was so delicious. It was nice to finally get the chance to go for a ride. I love to be on the motorcycle. The Goldwing is the most comfortable motorcycle to ever ride on. I love the feel of leaning on the bike and feeling my body rock side to side as we go winding through the canyons. The air rushing across my face making it feel tingly and the sound of the rubber of the tires contacting with the asphalt as the wheels propel us faster and faster. I love to hear silent roar of the Honda, it purrs like a kitten yet has a frightening amount of power. I love the smell of the fresh wind blowing past me. I love to feel the sun on my face as my cheeks get a slight burn and the sun warms me as it heats my black leather chaps, coat and gloves. The panoramic view through my sunglasses is ethereal as I watch the sun shine off of the ice on the mountainsides. Oh, I hope heaven has motorcycles.

Oh baby! Abbie, my precious niece is one of the funniest people I've ever met. She's barely one years old and she already knows how to get a whole room laughing. She loves to go walking and running. She's so cute when she walks on her own because she leads with her right leg making her walk in a slant. It's just adorable. And she surprised me this past weekend with all of the new words that she knows. Abbie has been learning new words to speak and to sign so rapidly it's exciting to see her development. She has the best manners. She loves to say "thanks" or "thank you". I just can't believe how big Abbie has grown since she was born and I'm excited to watch her grow up.

I know that this also another random topic but school is ending, and soon. I have only one month left with my roommates and friends here in Logan before I move home again. Jigity jig. I don't think that the people that I live with realize how much they have helped me to grow and to learn; socially, emotionally, spiritually and mentally. My sweet, sweet roommates have been a huge support to me when I've been feeling low and they have always been by my side when good times are to be had. I know that I was put here in Jones 302 for a reason. We have seen miracles together and we have endured many things together. I will always love them and cherish their friendships and I am sad that we will be leaving each other. Yet, I'm excited for all of us to move on and become the great people we want to be. I also have found many great friendships with the people in my building. I will never forget the first couple of weeks when our apartment first met the boys next door. We fell in love with them instantly. I personally have been able to create some tight relationships with the boys. I also have enjoyed hanging out with Will and Chris from upstairs. They have been some of my closest friends. I have shared so much with them. I love the people in my student ward. They all have such great testimonies and they are not afraid to share them. I have enjoyed teaching the sisters in Relief Society. I always get excited to teach them because they have such great insights that add to the lesson and to the Spirit. I'm very sad to think that I will be leaving all of these wonderful people to go home to stinky AF. AF is not all that horrible but my new friends don't live there so it stinks. I will always love and cherish every new friend that I have my first year up here in Logan. For better or worse they have affected me greatly and it's going to be heart-wrenching to finally say,"Good bye."

Stones In The River

I've been having quite a hard time for the past month. At times I have felt worthless or like I can never do anything right and at other times I have felt prideful and selfish. I feel like I've let myself get out of hand and that I have become sort of irresponsible. I haven't quite felt like myself. I've realized that I'm not serving others. I'm always too worried about how I feel and how I want others to serve me. I've also realized that I haven't worked on my relationship with my Heavenly Father at all. I've gone to church and ward prayer but I really didn't think much of it at all.

I have just been doing the bare minimum and the thought crossed my mind that Heavenly Father has blessings that he wants to give me. He wants me to be happy and he wants to help me be happy but I haven't been doing anything to prove to him that I deserve it. I have "favorite sins" that I have kept that I know I should give up. They aren't horrible sins. They are simple things such as watching certain shows, things that I say and songs I listen to. My new goal is to work on giving up these sins/habits so that I can spend my time working on my relationship with my Heavenly Father. I know that He is there for me and He does love me. I want to become close to Him so that when the hard and troubled times come He can help me get through them.

I don't know really what else to say other than to bear my testimony that I know that I have a Father in Heaven who loves me and wants me to return to Him. I know that Christ died for all of us so that we may be able to return to Heavenly Father. I'm so grateful that I have the chance to partake of the sacrament every week to help me renew my covenants. I'm grateful for the wonderful, worthy priesthood holders that I have in my life. With them around, I'm comforted to know that at any moment they are willing and ready to give a blessing whenever it is needed. I know that Joseph Smith was a true prophet and he did see the Father and the Son. He was an amazing man. I also know that our prophet today, Pres. Monson, is a true prophet and he receives revelation from our Heavenly Father for the church today. Bless him for all that he does for us. I know that what is in the Book of Mormon is true. There are so many blessings that are in store for us when we read the book. It was truly written for our day. Every word of that book is true and inspired. Whenever I read it I learn something new. I love the church and I'm so happy to be apart of if. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

Here Comes Spring!

Spring, spring, spring! Not only is it a verb but it is the fast approaching season! I can feel it in the air! This past week I felt it so much that I just had to celebrate by chopping off my hair. :D

I am also so excited for Spring Break next week. Mom has been begging for me to home she just misses me so much! I'm sure my dad misses me too. We are going to the Draper temple open house Saturday morning and we're going to do a Girls Day and possibly a daddy-mommy-daughter day too! I'm excited to see my neice too! I haven't seen her for a WHOLE month!!!! I can only guess how big she's gotten! She's my best buddy when I go home. I love her so much! So Spring Break is going to pretty much be the best week ever! But when I come back after the break I'll only have 7 more weeks of school! I can't believe my first year at college is almost over!!! I'm getting too old! :D

Lately I've gotten into the hobby of taking photos and then photoshopping them to look cool. I also learned some new tricks to make my pictures more impressive so I've been practicing. :D I've been craving to take a walk up the canyon or taking a drive to somewhere I haven't been before to take pictures. I hope that I can take some new pictures during the break so that I can bring them back and be able to mess with them in my spare time. Here are some sample of what I have so far:

Home Sweet Home

For the past week I have been looking and investigating different apartments for next year. I have been searching on the web and making calls to all of the managers and making tables and evaluating all that I can. I have found a cute a quaint little apartment that my friend and I want to move in and it seems to be the cheapest around. It will at least be a few hundred dollars cheaper than where I'm living now, which is a plus. :) I am going with my friend to go check out and sign a contract today! :/ I'm kinda nervous but I feel that it's right. So here we go! There is no place like having a home! :D

Ode to Jones Soda

Oh oh, Jones Soda you make my mouth go fizzy.
You have so much sugar cane my head is now dizzy.

Fufu Berry, Lemon Lime and you are even sugar-free.
Blue, pink, orange, red, green; pure colors hypnotize me.

I'll drink you in the morning, I'll drink you at night.
Jones soda always tastes just right.

Oh oh, Jones Soda you make my mouth go fizzy.
You have so much sugar cane you make my head go dizzy.

Musings of a Mental Nutcase

OK... So pretty much Valentine's Day is upon us. For the first time in a few years I don't have a valentine to share this special day with. It is sort of weird not having someone to say "I Love You" to. Yet, I do have some amazing roommates who are not going to let this perfect chance for a ladies night get away. Aubrey, Brittany and I are going to do dinner together and have some other single girls come over for a chick flick marathon and plenty of treats and popcorn! :D It will be a ton of fun!

Next subject is: FOG. Logan weather is so strange and unique! Back home we would rarely get fog or if we did it was gone within 15 minutes. I live on a hill in the north eastern part of Logan and last night I looked out across the valley and I was staring at the top of a cloud that had settled itself on the floor of the valley. It was like an ocean of cotton balls; so beautiful. This morning I woke up and the fog was so thick I could barely see the cemetery across the street. It's starting to go away now but the snow, frost and slight fog makes it seem so ethereal. It's just like a fantasy land. So pretty.

My mom gave a wonderful book for my birthday called The Traveler's Gift by Andy Andrews. I read it and highlighted the parts that I loved. I finished it this week and I just had to call my mom and discuss it with her. This book has so many good lessons in it. It's not just a "make you feel good" book; it actually has good advice that can be taken to heart and used in everyday life. I recommend this book to everyone and I would be more than willing to talk to anyone about it. :D I just love a good book!

Well, there is homework to be done, then lunch to be made before I head to class. So "Ladies and Gentlemen take my advice, Pull down your pants and slide on the ice."

Birthday Wishes

On the 5th was my sweet roommate's 19th birthday. I had so much fun decorating the apartment with crate paper, balloons and signs. I bought her flowers and a cute card. All of us roommates and one of Brittany's friends went to Angie's to "Clean the Sink". (For those who don't know Angie's is a local restaurant here in Logan where they serve you soft serve ice cream with your choice of 3 toppings. It comes in a small sink that is over flowing with ice cream heaven. the goal is to eat all the ice cream to get a bumper sticker that says, "I cleaned the sink at Angie's." This tradition of a Utah State students and locals is quite respected :D) anyway, we finished our sugary goodness and went home to have an Office Party and watch last weeks new Office episode. We had quite a fun time.

Then came my birthday. And my dear sweet roommates have been so sweet to give me many happy birthday wishes and a plethora of hugs. Aubrey and Lacey gave me Coca-cola chap sticks! Alaura gave me a beautiful earring and necklace set. And Brittany surprised me with a bouquet of roses and 2 cases of Coke. :D All of them are such sweet girls and I love them very much.

I traveled home Friday and went to dinner with my parents, Shell, Caleb, Abbie and Grandma. We went to Chili's and had some of the best dessert ever! The CCVC (Chocolate Chocolate Vanilla and Chocolate) also know to the rest of the world as the Chocolate Molten Cake. It is FANTASTIC!!! We had a fun time laughing and talking and Miss Abigail thought she was the star of the party. (She pretty much was.)

I had such a great time being home relaxing and just being quiet for once. I couldn't have had a better birthday. It's just weird to think that I'm really not a kid anymore and that I have to learn to grow old yet stay young at heart. I'm excited for the year to come and I hope that I can reach my goals and become a great human being.

Time to Blog

Ok ok.... so pretty much everybody has a blog now days! I was feeling a little left out and jealous that everybody else had such super cute and awesome blogs so I decided to get with it and start a blog. I'm not entirely sure what's going to happen on here but be assured that it is 100% just Necia: my thoughts, feelings, geekiness and fun. So far I'm off to a great start... :D