Chuck. The boy, not the beef.

My 11-year-old is wearing deodorant.

Can we all just pause and have a moment of silence? Let the magnitude of that action sink in....

DEODORANT! Like he's some full grown man or something! He has leg hair, too. Ugh.

Not that I'm opposed to him smelling better than he usually does here lately. I'm opposed to what wearing deodorant means.

He's growing up.

I don't like it.

He's way taller than me (pushing 5'6"), his feet have out grown Kenny's and I can't find pants to fit the kid because his tallness and skinniness don't match up. Do you know how hard it is to discipline a kid who is looking down at you? Not that that happens often, but I've lost that natural "I'm-bigger-than-you-hear-me-roar" advantage. So I have to wear my "Mommy face" since my "Mommy height" is invalid. And use a stool.

Helping deliver boxes of food while at Loaves & Fishes, a food pantry in Eastern Kentucky. So proud of this guy.  He also took time to pray with several of the people he met.  Yes, we prompted the kids to ask if they could pray for them, but that's a big deal for an 11-year-old boy!

He is rocking 5th grade this year. Taking advanced math and getting straight A's. He is a great student and I feel blessed that he's done so well with school. I mean, don't tell him, but coming here as a 6-year-old on his 3rd language and with no formal school, I was more than ready to give him some wiggle room when we started school way back when....but he clearly didn't need it!

I think he's smarter than me. Really.

First day of 5th grade.

The kid loves some soccer. He can be found most afternoons in the backyard with a ball. Or if the TV's on, he needs to know if there is a soccer game being played somewhere in the world. Charlie played (and started most games) on the middle school soccer team as a 5th grader this year. He also played on the Under 13 Spencer County select team. He's a good little soccer player and I can't wait to see how he'll continue to grow as a player...if we can only get him to stop being so stinkin' polite on the soccer field. Aggressive? Nope, doesn't describe him. But he's learning.

Exerting his soccerness.

He had his first real injury in the form of a very minor stress fracture in his foot this fall. He was actually only out for about 3 weeks, but acted as if he had been asked to sit out for the whole season. And Mommy learned to request a cast next time instead of thinking a boot would be easier. I'm sure it was easier, but you can't take a cast off to play a game of Twister with your friends or to play soccer in your sock feet in the church basement or to run up and down the basement steps..... Clearly his brain was partially fractured too.

And male.

He still loves Legos, origami, video games and all things food. I'm waiting for him to build me a summer home. He has enough Legos to do that. And while he puts together his masterpieces, he listens to music. I've been introduced to the Christian rap scene over the last few weeks. I've decided I can live without it. Disney Radio is much more my speed. And who doesn't love a good Elton John theme song?? Said every Disney movie ever made in the 90's.

A little post-soccer Ethiopian food.  I think he is daring Matthew to eat a handful of awaze sauce.  (It's hot.)

Look closely.  This child created a leash from grass, then caught a cat and proceeded to walk it around.  I don't even know what to say about that... 

One of Mommy's "keep everyone occupied" ideas this summer.  It worked.  For about 7 and half minutes.

My first born is turning into a young man. He is kind, polite, quiet, funny, loud, smelly, creative and I love all 100 pounds of him. We are fully in the throws of pre-teendom. Attitude, hormones and all. And I'm learning how do be Mommy to a kid who is teetering on the edge of being a teenager. I can already tell it's going to be a challenge. Maybe more for me than him, but we'll make it.

After all, millions of children live past the age of 11 each day.

Pre-teen ignoring of the parents.

We went to the beach. Three months ago.

So here's what you've missed....

We spent a lot of time in Alabama this summer taking care of broken people. (Gammy and a knee replacement.) And having fun.

Do I have to carry in my own luggage???

Kids Camp.  It happens every year.  With what seems to be a million and a half kids.  We had tons of exhausting fun.  And Sam got to go for the first year! Which means I had two bags of random little boy underwear and belongings to go through instead of just one.  "You don't even own plaid boxer shorts or a purple toothbrush....why are these in your bag??"

A whole bunch of people I love.

We went to the beach. All of us. And some fam. A whole week. It was glorious. And exhausting. But didn't I just define life with kids on a daily basis??

The boys started school. 5th and 2nd grade. They are big boys. Homework and tests and projects and cursive and pre-algebra. They are both kicking butt with straight A's on their first report cards.

We played lots of soccer. Lots. Middle school team, select team, rec team, Daddy-coached team. Just a lot of soccer.

Ellie Kate turned 3. Whaaaa...??? And started school too.  Whhhhhhhaaaaaatttttt???!!!???

Happy Birthday, sister!!

A couple of folks around here celebrated 10 years of marriage. The fact that we've been married that long is crazy. And we actually still like each other. If you'd asked me in 2004 what life would look like in 2014, I would have totally missed the mark. But wouldn't change one single second of this.

We just got back from our 5th trip to Eastern Kentucky. And once again I'm overwhelmed with the fact that there are people in my state living in worse situations than people in 3rd world countries. We helped Mr. Ruben...who was living in a "house" (really a shack...none of us would entertain living in what he called his home) with no electricity or water. And no indoor bathroom. Crazy. He now has a bathroom, shower, electricity, a stove and fridge, running water....all thanks to many mission groups who have worked together over the last few months.

My people in Linefork, KY.  Kenny was busy digging a hole.

While I sit on my fluffy couch typing on my iPad, aggravated that my WiFi is acting up.

Perspective.

And we did Halloween. Well, most of us did.  Some of us were almost too old so we kinda did Halloween.

Eyes closed, not looking at the camera. Every. Single. Picture.

So, now you're caught up.  There's been lots of normal life in between all that, too.  School, therapy, work, making dinner, cleaning all the dirty people and clothes, etc. It's November now, so we aren't gonna talk about the beach anymore.

Let's move on.  Updates on each kiddo coming....

Five.

Five years ago on August 24, 2009, we walked through the gates of Hope Orphanage in Addis Ababa and were greeted by many brown smiling faces. All of who were looking intently and wondering if we were their parents. While my eyes were scanning each face, looking for the two boys who had been my sons on paper only for the last 9 months. I had fallen in love with pictures of two children in the middle of Ethiopia that I had never even met and my heart was beating out of my chest now that it was time to meet them...




As the story goes, 6-year-old Charlie found us first. Locked eyes and made a beeline from the steps to his Daddy. He knew we were the ones. He had seen pictures of us.

Check. Found one. Still need another....

With Charlie accounted for, I quickly found 2-year-old Sam playing with a ball and scooped him up so fast he didn't have much time to react. (In hindsight, that probably wasn't the best idea, but my emotions got the best of me.) Charlie ran over and started talking to Sam with much more gusto than is normal for Charlie! While I have no idea what he was chattering about, I tell myself he was filling Sam in on the situation. "It's our Mommy and Daddy! Like the pictures we saw. We get to go home now!"




He drug his new family of four up the stairs by our hands to an office/empty room where other adoptive families were gathered and plopped us down in chairs as if he had been watching and waiting for his turn to do that. He knew the routine. He knew what to do.

It was finally his turn.




That trip to Ethiopia seems like forever ago. But in reality it was only a few short years ago. Sam has been in America longer than he was in Ethiopia. And Charlie is getting close to that milestone.

I'll say it again.

If I really think hard on it...really dwell on it...the way The Lord has grown our family completely and totally blows my mind. I have 3 kids sleeping soundly in my house from various corners of the world.

Unreal.

Adoption is hard. It's amazing. It's tragic. It's a blessing. It's an adventure. It's exhausting. It's borderline crazy. It's time consuming...it's ALL consuming! It's exciting. It's scary. It's a tangible. It's real. It's fun.

It's likely one of the best decisions I've ever made. At least in the top 3.

Happy five years, boys. So glad I get to call you sons.

And so glad you call me "Mommy"...

The first year of forever.

The longer I have to process Ellie Kate's adoption and I make new discoveries about where she came from and how special kids are identified in China, the more I realize it is only by the grace of God and pure miracle that this child has been home with us for an entire year.

Flat out miracle.

Few people know the actual reality of it and even I am going based on what I've been told and have read, but the place where Ellie Kate spent her first 20 months wasn't great. Not just because it was an orphanage. But so much more. Lack of funding, lack of training, lack of resources, lack of man power in general, put over 80 kids, all with varying degrees of special needs, in the care of less than 10 nannies. She was in one of the lowest tiered (for lack of a better way to explain it) orphanages in her province. It's just the truth of the situation. No ones fault. Just how things were.








I'm definitely not knocking the nannies who took care of her during that time. Actually eternally grateful for those women because they didn't have to. But think of the stress you'd be under with over 80 kids with major needs and no way to adequately take care of them. Every. Single. Day.

Not an ideal situation.

Not only are the orphanages responsible for supporting financially and caring for these kids, they also have to prepare the files of the children for adoption. And that costs money. Money her orphanage didn't have. I've been told there were only a handful of children (maybe 3 or 4) even adopted from there last year. What made someone chose the file of Ji Xisha to prepare for adoption over the next kid is only the beginning of God's plan for her tiny little life.








Then to add another level of amazing-ness, kids who have hearing loss aren't typically identified until much later when in settings like she was in. Even in a top-funded orphanage, she could have gone years without someone realizing she was deaf. Heck, in situations even in America, many kids go undiagnosed! Until they don't pass milestones they should be and it makes you think twice....you don't look at kids and just know they are deaf. It's just not one of those things that you pick up on right away unless they fail a newborn screening. And I would bet money on the fact that she certainly didn't have one of those. To look at her file and see her first hearing test confirming she was bilaterally and profoundly deaf at just under 15 months old is craziness.

I have a million questions. What made them test her? Who noticed she wasn't responding to that precious name? How long did they know? What did they try to do to see if she was hearing them? Who took the first steps to figure it out? What did they find out? Did they try to learn to communicate with her? Did someone comfort that precious child, knowing at night when it was dark, she now had lost two senses?

On June 24, 2013, the tiny human given to us to care for during her time here, was already beating the odds of most kids in her situation. The Lord had chosen her to be a Cook. He predestined her to be ours. And hopefully one day His.

Forever.

She was almost grey. Her hair felt like straw. Her skin was just slightly softer than sandpaper. She could barely sit up, but had this stand on her head trick she did to show off her pending skills. She wouldn't eat and let nothing but a bottle pass those lips for months. Her arms were like toothpicks attached to her frail 13-pound body. She could hear nothing and barely made a sound other than just cooing for months. She didn't know how to play, she didn't know how to be loved, she didn't return affection....it was like we had a 20-month-old newborn.









But she threw her whole being into trusting two perfect strangers and I can't even attempt to put into words how seeing her grow and be stretched into who she is only a year later makes me feel.

Miracle.

The redeeming part of this short story is that in the middle of Kentucky lives a tiny 19-pound Asian toddler with an attitude who has been hearing for 6 months. She curls herself into the crook of my arm each night as if she was actually made to fit there. Her little arms fling tightly around my neck in excitement even if I'm out of her sight for only 5 minutes. She dances a little jig and runs as fast as those stubby little legs will take her when Daddy gets home from work each day. She squeals in excitement when brothers come home from school each afternoon. She waves to almost everyone we pass and gives kisses to family and friends...as long as she still has a tight grip on Mommy.

So many things had to happen at just the right time and place to ensure that she was ours. How can you deny there's a God when He can orchestrate the lives of multiple people to collide at just the right time??

You can't.

Our last 4th of July began in a hotel in Hong Kong and ended 36 hours later at Louisville International Airport as a family of five. And surrounded by our closest family and friends. It's an experience I've been blessed to be a part of twice now and it's hard to put into words....but one I'm willing and eager to repeat...

You're one of my favorite American citizens. Happy ONE year home, EK.








PS...In January of this year, a well known organization named Half The Sky was able to finally gain access to EK's former home in Huazhou. The stories and transformations of the kids that remain are nothing short of their own tiny miracles. It's amazing to read about. Check out the story that was so compelling, it was picked up in a series of stories HERE by Huffington Post. It's hard to read and know that's where your child came from. But I can only pray that conditions continue to improve at Huazhou.

56 days.

Look.  I know.

It's been 56 days since I updated the blog.

But I don't know how in the world to write vaguely entertaining blog posts all while getting 3 kids to and from school, to the correct soccer field with all the required gear (which is only increasing as we get older), making sure everyone is fully clothed in semi-clean clothes and matching shoes, they've had their fruits and veggies, everyone is making the appropriate amount of poops, therapy appointments and playgroups attended, all the necessary forms we need to live daily life are filled out and signed, be a half-way decent wife and an pleasurable friend and make sure the house is free of visible dust bunnies and grape jelly coated floors.  Oh, and a part-time job on the side.

I mean...virtually impossible.

Although I've seriously entertained selling tickets to watch me go to the bathroom.  Honest.  It seems like the popular thing to do around here.  Apparently doing that alone is no longer an option.  Could be a lucrative business opportunity.  And I could kick that part-time gig and free up some time to blog. (Joking about kicking the part-time gig.  I love it.)

It's really not all that bad.  I love it actually.  (Bring 'em on...I'll take a few more!)  Sometimes I'd just rather spend time with my people than write about them.  And sleep.

But today....today is 5 months of hearing for Ellie Kate!

Still no magical words, although some of us think she has said "Papa".  And maybe baby and bye-bye.  I think it was just a fluke.  Because we haven't gotten them again.  I think her first word is going to be "help".  She's got the sign for that down pat and puts her whole being into asking for help, including a little "hhhhhhhh-ppp" sound.

That or "Mommy".  Which we are awfully close to as well.  Plus I'm the coolest.  Why wouldn't she say my name first??

Hoping brother will share.  She caught him on a good day, because he did.  Sam doesn't share food...

She's a constant chatterbox and quite the noisy little monkey.  We can meow like a cat, woof like a dog and make monkey sounds.  And will imitate anyone in the general area who is coughing, sneezing or laughing.  And occasionally farting.  (Which isn't at all embarrassing....)

She is picking up signs like a mad woman, often using new ones on a daily basis.  Every animal is a cat and every person is Mommy.  At least she can tell the difference between human and beast.  While we are definitely pushing language, all our signs greatly decrease our already heightened level of frustration with our lack of communication skills.

I'm gonna go ahead and document that as my greatest parenting challenge with her right now.  Not only is she a strong-willed, opinionated toddler, she is doing so with limited communication.  Which equals one mad baby on occasion.  Okay, a lot of occasions.  But I have to really evaluate situations and determine if the issue is communication or behavioral.  And a lot of times it starts as a communication issue and turns into a "I've lost all control of my body" issue because I don't know how else to tell you I don't want my stuffed elephant to be in the crib laying at that particular angle right now.  We've perfected the "sorry" sign and giving Mommy hugs when we return to normal happy baby status.  All that matters is consistency.  She knows what to expect and I try to respond the same no matter where we are.  And with patience.  Which is terribly hard sometimes when I have no clue what's wrong.  Now would be a good time to apologize to the patrons of Kroger earlier today.  Yes, I know she was screaming at the top of her lungs.  And no, I don't know why.  But we found us an empty space on a wall and sat down right on the grocery store floor until we regained composure.  Then we got a cookie.

And all was right in the world again.

Cousin stole our chair.  So she sat on him.

She is wearing her ear well.  And most of the time will come sit in my lap to let me put it on with no issues.  The only exception being after nap time.  But she just wakes up mad most of the time and we just have to give her a little bit of time before throwing sound at her again.  If it comes off, she'll come and stand next to me with her back towards me....as if to say, "Hey lady, will you put that thing back on my head?"  Still swear by The Bebop Shop retention cords.  No telling how many times we would have lost the thing if not attached to her shirt.  And how many heart attacks I would have had.

Now that summer is here, I'm still getting used to this whole it-can-get-a-little-wet idea.  I'm just a little protective over something that costs more than my car....I hope you can understand why.  Splash pads, sprinklers, etc are okay.  Diving to the bottom of a swimming pool...not okay.  Not that she does a whole lot of deep sea diving.  There are pool options, but we haven't had success with them because she doesn't tell us yet if she can't hear because her coil is off.  And I haven't shelled out the cash for the latest gadget that makes it capable to be in the pool as is.  Maybe later.

And I worried about how the boys would do with a baby sister...they love her!

We are still seeing her speech therapist, developmental interventionist and Teacher of Deaf at playgroup.  Our next steps are figuring out what to do when she turns 3 and ages out of early intervention.  But that's a whole other post.  I'm just in denial that she'll be 3 in 5 months, so I don't want to talk about it.

She saw her surgeon in April for 3 month check and he was quite impressed with the way things looked.  And her responding to her name.  I have to remind myself that the surgeons don't get to see all the little steps along the way that we do, so he was thrilled she was responding to anything!

We have been cleared by her audiologist until September.  No more mappings until then.  And at her last sound booth test, she was hearing in the 15-20 dB range.  Which is practically normal.

Basically she's a rock star.  Just a mini version.

Speaking of mini-rock stars, the one that lives here is ready for dinner.  And so are her back up singers.

If you're lucky, you'll get another post before 56 days passes.

And honestly, I hope you do.

Just picnicking to kick off summer.  Sam got onto me for not bringing her high chair so she could see over the table.  My bad, Sam.

The Toddler Rebuttal

Dear Mommy,

I'm so sorry for my recent transition into the Terrible Twos. Honestly, it caught me quite off guard as well. One minute I was fine with rolling with the punches and the next, this weird voice in my head was whispering to fling myself to the ground to get what I wanted. She said something about "everybody's doing it..." and she was right! I see other people my size doing it all the time!

I thought surely it wouldn't work with my Mommy, but I tried it anyway since the little girl at Target got a new toy the other day by doing that. Turns out, you usually ignore me when I do it, which I can barely stand because I'm so very adorable. Someone with such adorableness should never be ignored! I didn't get a new toy either... stupid voice.

So, I'm trying to do better. Occasionally I forget, like at the soccer field last night when you wouldn't let me play in the parking lot.... Sorry about that, by the way. That was some pretty loud screaming, huh?

I also tried taking off my socks and shoes, my bow and my ear when I get mad, but that didn't work out for me either. You just make me sit really still while you redressed me. And that usually makes me cry. But thanks for putting my ear back on even while I pretend to be a life-sized bobble head doll while you do it. (Isn't that fun, by the way?!?) I really should figure out how to do that myself sometime soon.

And that whole bit where I stomp my foot at you when you tell me no...yeah, I know you don't care for that, but I haven't figure out how to make my mouth tell you what I want yet. I'm working really hard. And you are always pointing at your ear and making lots of sounds and moving your mouth to try to help me and I really appreciate that.

But honestly Mom, I don't have a clue what you are talking about. I like it better when you talk to me with your hands. I understand that. I did try to say "help" today before I melted in a puddle because my doll stroller was stuck....did you hear me between the shrieks?? It probably sounded similar to my screams, but what I was trying to say was "Please help me, woman!!"

When I do get upset and cry, I appreciate you holding me even though I am being quite disagreeable. I realize I act like a giant turd on occasion, but sometimes I just need a Mommy hug. Always remember that, Mommy. Hugs fix almost all of my two-year-old problems.

In conclusion, please remember I'm learning more everyday and I'll do my best to keep the tantrums and fits at a minimum, but I can't make any promises. I just can't. Because I'm already planning the scene that will occur when you take me to Kroger with you tonight. And I'm 2. And have zero control over my emotions.

Don't forget all the times where I'm super cute and precious and adorable and I do obey, because I do a lot of that, too.

I love you more, Mommy.

Love,
Ellie Kate

P.S. You know that part about having no control over my emotions...just remember I'm a girl, so that's likely not to change for a good many years. I know you are used to raising boys, but those brothers of mine are rough and tough and I'm a princess. No apologies.

A Toddler Dictionary.

Being a toddler is hard work.

There are choices and too many things that Mommy says I can't touch and nap times. Occasionally being a toddler can be dangerous to the emotional well-being of those around me.

So here's a glimpse of our week, via simple definitions.

-----------------------

The Temper Tantrum: an exertion of will by a tiny human being due to loss of authority and the inability to control your own circumstances and emotions. Characterized by kicking and screaming. Can lead to parents making rash and uneducated decisions about how to make tiny individuals stop acting as if their appendages have just been chopped off with a red hot sword.

The Terrible Twos: an extended version of the temper tantrum that can last from 2 days to 2 years. Approximately. Can often reappear during early to mid teenage years. Characterized by periods of happiness and laughter (from child and/or parent) in between periods of wondering why you allowed your child out of bed this morning.

What do you mean I can't play with those pretty blue scissors you are using??

Are you 100% sure???

My day is ruined.  I CANNOT believe you won't let me use that thing with two sharp blades sticking out of it!  What could possibly go wrong??!!??  [huge, shuddering cry]

A Fit: a mini temper tantrum. Characterized by its short time frame and the ability to be redirected easily. If not contained and corrected, can easily turn into a temper tantrum.

The Flop: the beginning of a temper tantrum that results in body being thrown to the floor by self. Usually halted by the realization that things actually are going the way said tiny individual would like for them to go. Please ignore the flop, as acknowledgement results in escalation to a fit or temper tantrum. Also could be a warning sign of pending terrible twos.

The Pause:  that moment during the temper tantrum, a fit or the flop where said toddler will attempt to make eye contact to ensure you are watching.  Look away as quickly as possible because watching encourages tiny person to escalate.  Without your attention, a fit or the flop will sometimes diminish on it's own.  A pause during the temper tantrum is often what they call "the calm before the storm".  Run away.  Fast.

A flop with the pause.  To make sure I was paying attention to her display of displeasure with her current situation.  Which was me blowing my nose instead of continuing to walk down the hall.

The Hurt Feelings: what happens when a toddler feels he has been slighted and is too tired to launch a full temper tantrum. Characterized by real tears and the inability to be consoled. For hours. As with a fit, can easily escalate to a temper tantrum if not contained or a second wind is gained.

The Triggers: giving a toddler the wrong color cup, putting their socks on too early, walking the wrong way, looking at their toy with the wrong eye, washing their hair, cutting their food in the wrong size, offering the wrong temperature beverage, getting in the car, putting on a shirt, opening the door too fast, etc.  You get the point.  Basically everything.  Also being told no or being asked to follow a reasonable direction that larger human beings don't usually find offensive.

----------------------------

Sam likely had already experienced the terrible twos before arriving to our home. At least that's how I'll interpret the laughter and warnings received from his caregivers at the time when I eagerly told them who we were there to pick up. "Ohhhh noooooo, Edaso!! He is bad, bad boy!" (Read with thick Ethiopian accent. And he wasn't "bad boy" just strong willed.) He had his moments once home, but he soon learned his way didn't always work out and we quickly moved past his two-year-old period of rebellion. (Although, now we are in his 7-year-old period of rebellion. And the only upside is he understands the words coming out of this hole in front of my head. Doesn't seem to help, but I least I can justify his punishment by the fact that I know he knows English now. Love that kid.)

Charlie is my sneaky, but obedient one. I have a feeling Charlie's two-year-old self rarely had time for something as foolish as a temper tantrum or a fit because he was too busy carefully calculating how to manipulate his neighbor out of their portion of injera without a soul funding out. Or building an entire village out of origami.

Then there was Ellie Kate....

At my house, we have currently entered a stage of terrible twos, characterized by frequent fits, the occasional flop and many hurt feelings. And unfortunately temper tantrums.

The onset was very quick, escalating to full blown terrible twos in a matter of just a few days.  As her parental units, we were quickly taken off guard as our sweet compliant baby made the transition to a bold and opinionated toddler, but have recovered nicely over the weekend. (Recovery included extended naps. For her and Mommy.)

If you've never seen 19 pounds of mad, I invite you over. Sometimes it's hard not to laugh.  Other times I just step over her and walk away. And then there was that time I carried her kicking and screaming out of a Kohl's because I wouldn't let her play with those oh-so-safe moving stairs.  (Note to self:  If you accidentally left the stroller at home, just abandon all plans and go home.  Don't even attempt to go in said store.)

We spent a few days this week engaged in Operation How-to-respond-when-I-don't-get-my-way. Let's just say it's still a work in progress, but we are catching on to the fact that flinging ourselves on the ground rarely works.

Happy lunchtime.  Although the moments prior to this included a fit because the microwave wasn't making her quesadilla fast enough. Stupid microwave. But stabbing her carrots into said quesadilla seemed to help the situation. I'm certain she couldn't possibly be cuter if she tried.  100%.

I told her I would win this battle.

It's kinda my job.  I'm the mom.

And the only benefit was her letting me snuggle her when she has the hurt feelings.

Sweet baby girl.

"Aaaaaa" is for airplane.

We are 10 weeks post activation and sister continues to rock her CIs and blow us all away at her progress!

Hoarding cups.

Here's what we are doing now:

She turns almost all of the time to noise, sounds in her environment or her name being called. The exception being if she's in a noisy environment or if she is preoccupied with another activity. You know, kinda like your husband who is in the middle of watching an Alabama football game... (Love you, Pookie.)

Here she is responding to her name, fake laughing, ignoring my requests for a wave, grinding her teeth (which she still does on a regular basis) and a tiny example of her "I'm frustrated" scream. She is totally into Legos, but she lives in a house full of them, so I can't blame her. Ignore the laundry basket on the table. She put it up there.

No magical words yet, but definitely imitating coughs, laughing and other random sounds like "say ahhhh!" when I try to get her to open up to brush those tiny teeth. She usually obliges by copying what I have done and the sound I made. During speech therapy the other day, she randomly picked up the airplane and flew it through the air, making the "aaaaaaaa" sound. Which was a huge deal, because we've only done that with her 47 million times! Repetition counts, my friend. Even though I'm ready to chunk that plane out the window...

We've added a few signs to our repertoire, mainly because the level of frustration with no communication skills was going through the roof! She has a very distinct, ear splitting scream when she wants something. We sometimes get off track, but I can usually encourage her to use a sign or take me to what she wants instead of screaming. (Her favorite is dragging me to the fridge!) The best is when she uses every sign she knows at the same time if I'm not moving fast enough to satisfy her. I imagine in her mind she thinks she is screaming at me!

She has learned to give hugs. Which we love, but once she starts hugging, everyone in the room gets hugs. Multiple times. Ironically, her first spontaneous hug was for her speech therapist, Mrs. Cheryl. Which I suppose is fitting.

She has always had a little hip-hop-skip dance move that she does when I sign for her to dance, but now that she can actually hear the music, she will randomly dance to the TV or radio on her own by adding little crazy arm motions to her moves. Sister has zero rhythm, but I can't blame her. She doesn't really have a great dancing model...

What happens when a 13-year-old gets a hold of EK's hair.

And just because I measured her the other day to help a friend compare sizes for her new daughter, she weighs 19 pounds (fully clothed!) and is 30.5 inches. That means squirt is still wearing a size 2 diaper and mainly 12 months--some 18 month--clothes (needs 18 months for pants, definitely) and a size 3 infant shoe! Yes, she's tiny, but we have gained 6 pounds and grown 3.5 inches since June!!

Below is the speech banana, that gives better idea of how loud sounds are, etc.  The yellow part shows where sounds that we use for speech are located.  EK is now hearing from her right ear at roughly 25 db. Although remember her little ears are only about 2 months old and she often doesn't know what to do with what she hears.  This means she can feasibly learn the speech sounds now.  We will continue to tweak her CI to make sure we are maximizing her hearing.  We go back to her audiologist on Tuesday.  I'm eager to see how she does in the sound booth.  Since last time she flat out refused to participate.

Not at all a toddler thing to do...

(For reference, without her ear, she's between 100-110 dbs.  Essentially nothing.)

I'm still holding out for her first word.  Kenny has taught her to imitate "mmmmmmm" so we have bets on what it will be...

(Mommy.)

Happy day, boys. Happy day.

Six years ago today, two little fellas showed up at an orphanage in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. Without much info to go on, they were both given March 11th as their birthday.

People.

I have a 7 year old and an 11 year old.

What...??!!!? How...??!!?!

I know. I'm still struggling to wrap my mind around it. Doesn't seem possible. Read as: I can't possibly be 2 years away from having a teenager!!! (Where's my panic button??)

When we made the trip to Ethiopia to add these two to our family over four years ago, I was consumed with them. Just them.

How do I help them adjust? How do I help them learn English? How do I help them understand that this family is forever? How do I help them remember to flush the toilet? Heck, how do I get them to remember to actually go IN the toilet?? How do I get Sam to stop screaming for "dabo"? (That's bread, by the way and he's over it now.) How do I get Charlie to stop pushing every button he sees? How do I get Sam to take a nap? How do I get Charlie to think I'm hilarious and stop staring at me like I'm crazy...?

And how, oh how, do I ensure they keep their ridiculously cute Ethiopian accents??

We failed at the whole accent thing, but every once in a while I'll pick up on a little redneck mixed with Amharic.

And that makes me smile.

Because I was so focused on survival in the beginning, I overlooked a huge piece of the puzzle that made our family who it currently is. But more often lately, I think about our Ethiopia Mommy and wish I knew more about her. I know March 11th probably wasn't the day that she gave birth to the two that have been woven into the fabric of our family, but on that day, I have to wonder what she had planned for her sons, what she felt their future held, what she hoped they would grow up to be...

Although this woman has no name or face, she is a hero to me. She holds a special place in my heart although it's likely our paths will never cross. And although a huge deal, our sole common thread is motherhood to two handsome boys who are quickly growing into the young men I hope she would be proud of...

Happy Birthday, Charlie & Sam!!

A beautiful family.

In the early pre-school hours of February 26, 2013, we received word of a tiny 16-month-old in Huazhou, China.

Words cannot even describe the excitement, the fear, the joy, the overwhelming-oh-my-gosh-this-is-really-happening feelings that took place in the days to follow as we filled out every form known to man to make this sweet child part of our family forever.

Even though you've only been with us for 8 short months, we've known your face for a whole year.









Even though international adoption is a crazy rollercoaster of complete unknown, there are moments when God shows up and gives gifts that you had no idea you needed.

Even though I never in a million years imagined my family would be grown the way it has been, in His infinite wisdom, The Lord has blessed us immeasurably.

We spent some family time last weekend at Great Wolf Lodge, thanks to some Christmas money from the great-grandparents. Although I honestly don't normally think twice about it and find it somewhat humorous to watch people try to figure out our family, for some reason, I had mentally prepared myself for the on-slaught of questions, stares, smiles, disapproving glances we would get over the weekend being in a different environment. All the things we normally get when ALL five of us are together. And apparently adding a ridiculously cute Chinese toddler with a cochlear implant hanging off the side of her head to our mix didn't help our blending in factor.






We got those stares and disapproving glances, just like normal. But in true putting-me-in-my-place fashion, The Lord put three different individuals in our path over the weekend that approached me and said the EXACT SAME WORDS...

"I just wanted to tell you that you have a beautiful family."






The third time it happened I almost cried. Kinda like I am now typing this out. But you couldn't have wiped the huge grin off my face if you had wanted.

Yes, there are plenty of people that think we are crazy and can't imagine why in the world we have a rainbow of children at our house. (I only have three, people. Not that odd.) And while I can't refute the crazy part, I have never once doubted our decision to adopt. Maybe a few "what have we done??" moments...but never a question to God's calling to grow our family.









God's children are a His and deserve a family regardless of what shade of human they are, what country they were born in or what the world deems is wrong with them. Can you imagine if that same God discriminated against us for any of those reasons?? So what gives us a right to do that?

Nothing. Not one single thing.

Which is why I can answer when people ask me why, with a simple "Why not??"

And I promise you can't give me an answer that makes sense.

At least not for our family.

-----------------------

Sorry I got all preachy on y'all. I just love my kids! If you need more info about adoption, I know a rockin' awesome group of people who love Jesus and would love to help you out. Check out Lifeline Children's Services. Now.

A scattered update.

We are 7 weeks post-op and Friday was 5 weeks post-turn-our-ear-on.  She is still rocking the CI and making progress everyday. Here's a scattered post with random pictures about the process and how things are going...

We are asking for our ear after nap time. Not everyday. But it's happened about 3 times this past week, so it's a relatively new development. This, my friends, is a HUGE deal!! At least I think it is. It shows me that she's making a connection between the CI and what it does for her. And the more she wants to hear, the easier this whole process will be!

"Lady!  Where's my ear??  You know...the one that makes me hear stuff??"

We no longer cry the pitiful cry every single time we put it on. Sometimes, yes. But not all the time. We have a theory about why the crying has decreased. Y'all know she has a magnet in her head. And a magnet in the coil that makes it stay on her head. Well, long story short, her magnet was way too strong and had made quite the little sore on her head by the time we were able to get it changed to a weaker magnet. Our audiologist said a magnet that is too strong can actually cause the internal magnet to move. HOLY MOLY! Does that weird anyone else out?? Since decreasing the strength in her magnet way, way down (to let the site heal) she has stopped the terrified screaming. I think part of the issue is that initial connection was causing her a little pain. I'm gonna go with just a little pain because I really hope it wasn't causing a LOT of pain. After 2 weeks with the new magnet, it already looks tons better and now I know better what to look for if the magnet is too strong. A red spot is a red flag. Check!

EK's favorite after dinner spot.  She gets down from the highchair and goes straight
to Daddy because she knows he'll give her more.

Downside to the weaker magnet...it falls off even if she's just walking. Or doing her little hip-hop-and-skip-walk. Which is typical for her. It's been hanging on a little better the last few days, but I'm hoping we can bump that strength up a tad once it's healed and we won't spend all day sticking it back on. Although if it does come off, she's really good about letting me know so we can get that sucker back on.

A lego-fabulous snow day.  We've had so many snow days I don't even know which one this was.

More lego fun.  With EK sized legos. AKA: How to keep EK busy while Mommy
cooks dinner!

Her vocalizing has continued. She is definitely babbling more than her pre-CI days. Even imitating sometimes...like pretending to cough when I cough which she is doing as I type!  Little faker.  Of course, I'm pretty sure she has said "mommy".....ok, not really. But fingers crossed for her first word? She has said "mmmmmmmmm!" That's really, really close....

She's also using more signs and using them spontaneously (and with some help). Yes, we are definitely focusing on words (which means I talk to myself all day long), but that doesn't happen overnight. And the screaming and whining to get what you want is totally not cool. So to bridge the mounting frustration with our lack of communication skills, we are still working the signs. (Excuse the pj's and crackers in the middle of the day in the video.  Mommy & Daddy got to "enjoy" another round of the stomach bug last week and this was one of those days.)

We had our first fever and "oh my gosh, do we have an ear infection?" scare since surgery. I say scare, but really more just concerned parental units. Ok....so we completely acted like first time parents and immediately rushed her straight to the pediatrician. A fever and yucky snot and cough makes me worry about ears. They actually tested her for RSV since we had a RSV-ish cough. It was negative and ears were clear. She felt generally crummy the rest of the week, but it was only a virus.

Hanging out at the dentist office.  Who's idea was it to take all
three kids on the same day??  And all by myself!  Really...they
did well.  Well, the boys did.  And the dentist got to actually
look in EK's mouth in between the screams....

She's on the last program of her most recent map. We go back to the audiologist this week for another sound booth test and to continue to tweak things. Our audiologist confessed at our second mapping appointment that she was turned up louder her first time around than she normally does...."I just kept turning it up and she just kept hanging in there and not having an issue with it, so I left it turned up higher!" But what that means now, is 5 weeks into her hearing career, she is hearing at pretty much the level we want her to...speech, all kinds of noises, etc. Now, the big disclaimer is she obviously still doesn't know what to do with those sounds, so while she may be able to hear us, in the fashion of a 4 week old newborn, she straight up ignores us. Most of the time.

This is in the sound booth at her 2nd mapping appointment.  Hanging out with
an UofL audiology student.

See the freaky looking Winnie-the-Pooh bear in the corner??  That's what
they flash when she responds to the noise on her left side. I'm not so certain
the motivation with the scary bear would keep me looking, but she did well.

Now that we are 7 weeks post-op the swelling at her surgery site has completely gone down. I thought it was down before, but it wasn't until I realized I can literally see and feel the implant and cords and magnets right under the skin that all the swelling was really gone. And it freaked me out just a tad. I mean, it's kinda big! And bumpy! Made me want to put a helmet on her all waking hours.

See the incision from the top of her ear down the backside of her ear?  It's looking
really good.  And if you look really close...there's a bulge.  That's the goods, folks!

Incision above her ear.  And yes, that's a dirty ear.  We took care of that.

We started speech therapy on Friday and have her IFSP meeting tomorrow for her next 6 months of First Steps (early intervention). She has come soooo far since we started in September.  Seriously.  She was so much farther behind than she is now.  But in the last 6 months we've started walking (kinda skipped walking and went right to running!), doing much better eating table food and still learning how to play and just be a toddler. She will continue with play group, will keep seeing her Developmental Interventionist, Ms. Paula (who has been loads of info through this whole process!!) and Mrs. Cheryl with Speech.  And we can't forget super service coordinator, Adrienne!  We shared an office during my First Steps days, sooooo....I'll just leave it at she's the best and rocks her job! (She needs a raise, Deb!!) But we have a great team helping us learn, make big strides to listening and talking and helping us every step of the way.  But they keep wanting to talk about what we will do when she turns 3....and I don't want to talk about her turning 3.  She's just a baby!!

We've had way too many snow days, so I'll leave you with a few snowy pics and a video of EK trying to blow kisses.  Just because she's cute.  Enjoy.

"I'm ready for the snow, Mom!"

Two happy boys!  Enjoying one of our snow days that it wasn't -20 degrees...sledding!!

Apparently the girls thought snow and sand were interchangeable and buried her.
Good news is she loves the snow!

Precious baby.  Wiped out from learning to listen.  And playing in the snow.