TGIF!
Ok.. I'm still awake and not willing to sleep at this time of the day. Must be crazy. Haha... Who cares man?! Its Friday tml!
First thing first. Why the hell does Labour day have to fall on a Saturday?! Gosh... I think my hols is gonna be eaten up by the company... Haiz.. When all my colleagues are gonna have their leaves/off advanced. Oh well. Hopefully i can do my work tomorrow in peace without and "bright ideas" coming towards me.
I just recieved a sms from Peter Ong... Its like the duty list for Sunday service! And on the Befriender section,
Befriender: Ken Sie/Weiyong.
WOAH! Am i going to start my service this week? O.o I think weiyong is going to take it ba... I told him i'm gonna do it next week. Be mentally prepared first. Haha.. Ok..
I guess this year is really a year of revolution for myself.
1. I'm single.
2. I'm BAPTISED!
3. My name is Ken now!
4. I'm a working intern whose working like a perm staff.
5. I'm learning something now... Procrastination failed this time against Sign Language.
6. I'm serving in church now.. Not as one of the camp com but a Befriender.
7. I'm part of a proper DG now which name is most likely gonna be Anchors.
I guess... This year is the year of change. A year why i learn that change is not only around me. Change is a process i'm going through too. Its something i need to learn to cope and thus learn to change too.
Out of the 7 changes on me, 4 is linked to my baptism and church. 1 of which i am using to put them to good use in church when i am capable enough. This year will be the year where i HOPE and PRAY that i become a vassal, a vassal where He can use to glorify His kingdom and do His works. I know its really hard, i know that though i've been regular in church for like 4-5 years, there is a invisible barrier which i have to break so i can feel comfortable. Guess this is the personal bubble i need to burst.
Lastly, 7 changes i've mentioned! 7 is a good number.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Hopelessly devoted to you.
Everyone no worries. Khengsoon here is not emo. =D Its just another real nice song which i picked out from Grease. Retro... Yet real nice. =)
This IA experience had me thinking for quite a while. This experience is surely going to change my whole career path. Sure, i had learnt quite a lot from the company in terms of materials research but i am seriously doubtful that i'm interested in it. Maybe its the kind of job that was passed down or the bosses thing. But this isn't exactly a good impression i am having in the R&D world.
Firstly, i don't like OT. I value my life very much. I can be volunteering after work, i do not want to work after office hours. That's 1 resolution and thats never to subscribe to OT. Secondly, i figured out something. Don't take any jobs just cause you can earn more. I think it really sucks if you really are not that interested anymore.
Thats 2 takeaways from my experience.
Everyone no worries. Khengsoon here is not emo. =D Its just another real nice song which i picked out from Grease. Retro... Yet real nice. =)
This IA experience had me thinking for quite a while. This experience is surely going to change my whole career path. Sure, i had learnt quite a lot from the company in terms of materials research but i am seriously doubtful that i'm interested in it. Maybe its the kind of job that was passed down or the bosses thing. But this isn't exactly a good impression i am having in the R&D world.
Firstly, i don't like OT. I value my life very much. I can be volunteering after work, i do not want to work after office hours. That's 1 resolution and thats never to subscribe to OT. Secondly, i figured out something. Don't take any jobs just cause you can earn more. I think it really sucks if you really are not that interested anymore.
Thats 2 takeaways from my experience.
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Sunday is gonna pass and it really sucks!
Seriously. I finally know how working people feel when it comes to monday blues man. Totally nothing like going back to school. Haha..
We had a real short dg and service today. Reason was cause there is a AGM after service which i din't attend. =P Ooops... Our Lutheran Bishop came to our church today to preach and i must say that his words are real enlightening. Haha... I was about to bust out my sign notes when i realised i should listen. Haha.. Maybe God was giving me knock on my head. Its about Him as the shepherd and our pastors as the head sheep with a bell. And so, we are the sheeps in the herd following our head sheep. Sounds real meaningful as the analogy was quite appropriate. Haha.
Dg today was not on our lessons. We had to pick a name for our Dg... We had many. I suggested MoF myself as Men of Faith but there were females in our group from the BB primers. So fail.. We ended up with kenneth's suggestion which was Anchors. I really like the name. Its actually very meaningful. First, the BB logo has an anchor and so its a direct affliation. Secondly, we are anchors of faith for our boys, the primers and lastly for each other. Lastly, as an anchor, we hold on to something to stand firm on our grounds. He will be our Solid Rock on which we are anchored on. I thought of everything myself! Haha... Except the name...
How CO.OL is that??? =D
Ok... About time to sleep!
Seriously. I finally know how working people feel when it comes to monday blues man. Totally nothing like going back to school. Haha..
We had a real short dg and service today. Reason was cause there is a AGM after service which i din't attend. =P Ooops... Our Lutheran Bishop came to our church today to preach and i must say that his words are real enlightening. Haha... I was about to bust out my sign notes when i realised i should listen. Haha.. Maybe God was giving me knock on my head. Its about Him as the shepherd and our pastors as the head sheep with a bell. And so, we are the sheeps in the herd following our head sheep. Sounds real meaningful as the analogy was quite appropriate. Haha.
Dg today was not on our lessons. We had to pick a name for our Dg... We had many. I suggested MoF myself as Men of Faith but there were females in our group from the BB primers. So fail.. We ended up with kenneth's suggestion which was Anchors. I really like the name. Its actually very meaningful. First, the BB logo has an anchor and so its a direct affliation. Secondly, we are anchors of faith for our boys, the primers and lastly for each other. Lastly, as an anchor, we hold on to something to stand firm on our grounds. He will be our Solid Rock on which we are anchored on. I thought of everything myself! Haha... Except the name...
How CO.OL is that??? =D
Ok... About time to sleep!
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Exam over! Kudos!
Finally the HR monster is done for and its off my back now. Gosh... Its been haunting me and now that the exam is over, there's nothing i can do anymore as i had already did my best for it and i'm am still satisfied with how i did. Not sure whether i did good though... But i do hope i can get a B+ and above. Seriously.
After exams, Hong and me just went to City Vibes arcade and spent the whole afternoon there waiting for Clar to finish his project stuff in school and then join us for L4D2. Seeing how Hong plays Street Fighter 4, i felt a bit of an urge to play too. But there wasn't any solo playing and any token i put in would be just a waste of money cause there were pros there. My fav character is still Ken though he seemed useless in the game now. How sad....
We had 2 hours or L4D when Clar came... Finished a map... Quite fun considering its only the 3 of us. Haha... After that, we went back to the arcade to finish my remaining 3 tokens on KOF.... Me, Clar and Hong with each char... Its fun but super hard! I nv play KOF before... Haha... After that was the long missed Zha Jiang Mian! Still as nice as ever... =D
I came back home to realise that i have nothing to watch again... There i go again.... D/ling HIMYM season 5 now and meanwhile.... Grease!!!! John Travolta is GOOD! Here's the best song ever!
Seriously.. I wonder why it took me so long to watch these when i had it like since last year! Now i'll be listening to its OST whole day... okok....
Its late... I'm gonna be so tired tml... Gosh.... I really hope IA pass by fast! Oh ya.... I'm gonna play wenhao and siqian's birthday dinner. Tentatively is 28th april... Haha... Sms will be sent soon!
Finally the HR monster is done for and its off my back now. Gosh... Its been haunting me and now that the exam is over, there's nothing i can do anymore as i had already did my best for it and i'm am still satisfied with how i did. Not sure whether i did good though... But i do hope i can get a B+ and above. Seriously.
After exams, Hong and me just went to City Vibes arcade and spent the whole afternoon there waiting for Clar to finish his project stuff in school and then join us for L4D2. Seeing how Hong plays Street Fighter 4, i felt a bit of an urge to play too. But there wasn't any solo playing and any token i put in would be just a waste of money cause there were pros there. My fav character is still Ken though he seemed useless in the game now. How sad....
We had 2 hours or L4D when Clar came... Finished a map... Quite fun considering its only the 3 of us. Haha... After that, we went back to the arcade to finish my remaining 3 tokens on KOF.... Me, Clar and Hong with each char... Its fun but super hard! I nv play KOF before... Haha... After that was the long missed Zha Jiang Mian! Still as nice as ever... =D
I came back home to realise that i have nothing to watch again... There i go again.... D/ling HIMYM season 5 now and meanwhile.... Grease!!!! John Travolta is GOOD! Here's the best song ever!
You're the one i want
G: Tell me about it stud!
B: I got chills.
They're multiplyin'.
And I'm losin' control.
'Cause the power
you're supplyin',
it's electrifyin'!
G: You better shape up,
'cause I need a man
and my heart is set on you.
You better shape up;
you better understand
to my heart I must be true.
B: Nothin' left, nothin' left for me to do.
Both: You're the one that I want.
(you are the one i want), o,o, oo, honey.
The one that I want.
(you are the one i want want), o,o,oo, honey.
The one that I want
(you are the one i want want), o,o, ooooo
The one I need.
Oh, yes indeed.
G: If you're filled
with affection
you're too shy to convey,
meditate in my direction.
Feel your way.
B: I better shape up,
'cause you need a man
G: i need a man
who can keep me satisfied.
B: I better shape up
if I'm gonna prove
G: you better prove
that my faith is justified.
B:Are you sure?
Both:Yes, I'm sure down deep inside.
You're the one that I want.
(you are the one i want want), o, o, oo, honey.
The one that I want.
(you are the one i want want), o,o,oo, honey.
The one that I want
(you are the one i want),o, o, oo
The one I need.
Oh, yes indeed.
Repeat Chours 2x
B: I got chills.
They're multiplyin'.
And I'm losin' control.
'Cause the power
you're supplyin',
it's electrifyin'!
G: You better shape up,
'cause I need a man
and my heart is set on you.
You better shape up;
you better understand
to my heart I must be true.
B: Nothin' left, nothin' left for me to do.
Both: You're the one that I want.
(you are the one i want), o,o, oo, honey.
The one that I want.
(you are the one i want want), o,o,oo, honey.
The one that I want
(you are the one i want want), o,o, ooooo
The one I need.
Oh, yes indeed.
G: If you're filled
with affection
you're too shy to convey,
meditate in my direction.
Feel your way.
B: I better shape up,
'cause you need a man
G: i need a man
who can keep me satisfied.
B: I better shape up
if I'm gonna prove
G: you better prove
that my faith is justified.
B:Are you sure?
Both:Yes, I'm sure down deep inside.
You're the one that I want.
(you are the one i want want), o, o, oo, honey.
The one that I want.
(you are the one i want want), o,o,oo, honey.
The one that I want
(you are the one i want),o, o, oo
The one I need.
Oh, yes indeed.
Repeat Chours 2x
Seriously.. I wonder why it took me so long to watch these when i had it like since last year! Now i'll be listening to its OST whole day... okok....
Its late... I'm gonna be so tired tml... Gosh.... I really hope IA pass by fast! Oh ya.... I'm gonna play wenhao and siqian's birthday dinner. Tentatively is 28th april... Haha... Sms will be sent soon!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Hello people... I'm not emo today... I promise you (Louelle, Eddi) i try not to emo. =D
Today was a good day. I studied a lot today. Ok... Maybe its not a lot but i really felt that i accomplised a lt today when studying for my HR. At least, i feel more prepared now as compared to the times before this week. Maybe that's why i am in the Mathew Linus's borderline case party ba.
This is a new writing style i will adopt from wenhao... I shall write down the heading for what i am going to say.
1. First day on leave + Squash
Monday was my first day on leave. I am really glad i took the leave as i really think i needed it and that i needed to study too. I was supposed to meet Seok but i did meet her to study together. But my spot became too noisy for her and she moved. =D Nevertheless, Yongkiat was there too and he stayed with me. Haha.. Its been a long time since i had studied with Yongkiat and i can see that he is as hardworking as usual. Yimin came along and i asked her to sit down too. Oh ya.. Yimin, you haven tell me about your story yet. -.-" But i doubt you will see this. NVM.
Studying was not that productive as i couldn't calm myself down as i haven't studied for so long! haha.. In the end, my attention was short-lived most of the time and was easily distracted. However, i still completed some of the readings la.
Squash came at 4 and i met the guys in clubroom. There were Nat, Ethan, Mervyn, Jeremy, Hazimah... Eugene, Weinian and Chongren came along later but they went to gym. Seok came at around 5. Squash was AMAZING! All of them are beginners who can play properly... Nat was the best player there i guess and its really nice to play him again after so long. He wasn't pro, but he keeps me guessing which really entertained me and had me running. Good Job Nat! After many mini matches, we went to megabites for dinner... I remembered to pay. =P
Oh wait!
The swimming pool uncle actually remembers me! Its happened when Nat and me went into the pool to shower... "Yishun Town right?!" Haha... That was what he shouted when he saw me. Reason was that he saw me and we negotiated during the Engin Camp dry run when i was chief councilor. Gosh... He's a really nice uncle though. Haha... So rare to have people recognise you...
2. 2nd day on leave + Sign class
I had lotsa help from Seok's notes today and the readings were much easier now. I think i covered quite a lot and i just hope that i can remember my stuff. Its open book. Library was really a good place to study in and i was sitting with Shimon's CSS friends. Though i only know Janis, its still ok as everyone was mugging. Haha...
We took the circle line for the first time! To mountbatten! Woah... Traveling time really cut down by a lot but we were nevertheless late for class. I had to use the first half of my time there catching up and being lost. Good.. I caught up nevertheless.. We had this game of broken telephone which was quite fun. Shirley was really nice and patient with us.
Lesson ended later and i went in to crash Shimon's class while waiting for them. Awesome man... Freddy was quite funny.
Ok... Thats quite all that i have today... Tired... Muscles are aching....
BYE!
Today was a good day. I studied a lot today. Ok... Maybe its not a lot but i really felt that i accomplised a lt today when studying for my HR. At least, i feel more prepared now as compared to the times before this week. Maybe that's why i am in the Mathew Linus's borderline case party ba.
This is a new writing style i will adopt from wenhao... I shall write down the heading for what i am going to say.
1. First day on leave + Squash
Monday was my first day on leave. I am really glad i took the leave as i really think i needed it and that i needed to study too. I was supposed to meet Seok but i did meet her to study together. But my spot became too noisy for her and she moved. =D Nevertheless, Yongkiat was there too and he stayed with me. Haha.. Its been a long time since i had studied with Yongkiat and i can see that he is as hardworking as usual. Yimin came along and i asked her to sit down too. Oh ya.. Yimin, you haven tell me about your story yet. -.-" But i doubt you will see this. NVM.
Studying was not that productive as i couldn't calm myself down as i haven't studied for so long! haha.. In the end, my attention was short-lived most of the time and was easily distracted. However, i still completed some of the readings la.
Squash came at 4 and i met the guys in clubroom. There were Nat, Ethan, Mervyn, Jeremy, Hazimah... Eugene, Weinian and Chongren came along later but they went to gym. Seok came at around 5. Squash was AMAZING! All of them are beginners who can play properly... Nat was the best player there i guess and its really nice to play him again after so long. He wasn't pro, but he keeps me guessing which really entertained me and had me running. Good Job Nat! After many mini matches, we went to megabites for dinner... I remembered to pay. =P
Oh wait!
The swimming pool uncle actually remembers me! Its happened when Nat and me went into the pool to shower... "Yishun Town right?!" Haha... That was what he shouted when he saw me. Reason was that he saw me and we negotiated during the Engin Camp dry run when i was chief councilor. Gosh... He's a really nice uncle though. Haha... So rare to have people recognise you...
2. 2nd day on leave + Sign class
I had lotsa help from Seok's notes today and the readings were much easier now. I think i covered quite a lot and i just hope that i can remember my stuff. Its open book. Library was really a good place to study in and i was sitting with Shimon's CSS friends. Though i only know Janis, its still ok as everyone was mugging. Haha...
We took the circle line for the first time! To mountbatten! Woah... Traveling time really cut down by a lot but we were nevertheless late for class. I had to use the first half of my time there catching up and being lost. Good.. I caught up nevertheless.. We had this game of broken telephone which was quite fun. Shirley was really nice and patient with us.
Lesson ended later and i went in to crash Shimon's class while waiting for them. Awesome man... Freddy was quite funny.
Ok... Thats quite all that i have today... Tired... Muscles are aching....
BYE!
Sunday, April 18, 2010
This week had been an awesome week. As i have mentioned, i passed my IPPT with His grace and had my second basic sign class. I'm not proud of myself though...
Ok.. I'm disturbingly emo..
1. DG
Had my second DG on deuteronomy today... Lessons were real short and i like it actually. Its cause we had more time to catch up with each other's life and how it has been through the week. Its real important i guess, cause we get to know that there are friends who are actually concerned and will pray for you whenever you have a request or problem. It will be me leading the DG for the next session and though it is gonna be my second time, i am still a bit nervous. Good thing they're really like people who knew me for more than 10 years le.
Maybe sometimes when i feel too tired of telling myself that i'm gonna be ok, i might look to them as a source for comfort. I'm really not good in telling people how i really feel.
This is the study bible i got from my church / BB officers... Its a real big bible whereby verses are explained in detail and thus we will get to know His word better. It has pictures too. =D I really hope that i can so a good job in leading the DGs and to really affirm my faith through teaching and learning at the same time.
2. Serving the Lord
My heart has been in a turmoil. Its the sort of you want to do something but you do not dare to take a step to get it starting type. Things are easier if you ask me to plan a game or plan a gig you know? Oh well, i knew i had to make a decision today as i will be seeing Mr Ong today...
It was Weiyong who came to me. I knew what he was gonna say the minute he came to me. My heart told me to say yes anyway cause it is serving His ministry. My brain was giving me doubts.
I said YES eventually. To be frank, i am not the public speaking or presenting type of person and i actually hate it unless i am explaining a game or something.
The question is... Why is Weiyong and Mr Ong so so so confident i can do it? Both of them say that i have no problem one. Haiz... Can anyone just tell me how i actually present myself when i do public speaking?
Anyway. I guess it really fulfills one of my desire too. That is to serve in the church in one aspect or another. Thats the consolation ba. One day, i will put my sign language into use. By the time i complete my course, i hope i can start or be part of a deaf community in church.
But for now, i will be an announcer(befriender) in my youth service. I will do my best.
3. Baptism present
And amazingly, i get to recieve 1 more present! This was quite unexpected cause its from Tim and Abigail.. Ok la... Abigail maybe... But Tim?! Haha.. Anyway... I love the present very much! Just when i lacked a daily devotional material, this came. =D
I would have thought the daily bread was good for my everyday reading. I guess this is much cooler. As the picture below suggests, its 240 verses from the Word of God. I do like to think deep into his Words, but i do not have much to think about as my knowledge is really the tip of an iceberg. I guess this will spark off something for me. At least, i really hope so... I really promise i will use it.. Read one each day.
Ok.. I'm disturbingly emo..
1. DG
Had my second DG on deuteronomy today... Lessons were real short and i like it actually. Its cause we had more time to catch up with each other's life and how it has been through the week. Its real important i guess, cause we get to know that there are friends who are actually concerned and will pray for you whenever you have a request or problem. It will be me leading the DG for the next session and though it is gonna be my second time, i am still a bit nervous. Good thing they're really like people who knew me for more than 10 years le.
Maybe sometimes when i feel too tired of telling myself that i'm gonna be ok, i might look to them as a source for comfort. I'm really not good in telling people how i really feel.
This is the study bible i got from my church / BB officers... Its a real big bible whereby verses are explained in detail and thus we will get to know His word better. It has pictures too. =D I really hope that i can so a good job in leading the DGs and to really affirm my faith through teaching and learning at the same time.
2. Serving the Lord
My heart has been in a turmoil. Its the sort of you want to do something but you do not dare to take a step to get it starting type. Things are easier if you ask me to plan a game or plan a gig you know? Oh well, i knew i had to make a decision today as i will be seeing Mr Ong today...
It was Weiyong who came to me. I knew what he was gonna say the minute he came to me. My heart told me to say yes anyway cause it is serving His ministry. My brain was giving me doubts.
I said YES eventually. To be frank, i am not the public speaking or presenting type of person and i actually hate it unless i am explaining a game or something.
The question is... Why is Weiyong and Mr Ong so so so confident i can do it? Both of them say that i have no problem one. Haiz... Can anyone just tell me how i actually present myself when i do public speaking?
Anyway. I guess it really fulfills one of my desire too. That is to serve in the church in one aspect or another. Thats the consolation ba. One day, i will put my sign language into use. By the time i complete my course, i hope i can start or be part of a deaf community in church.
But for now, i will be an announcer(befriender) in my youth service. I will do my best.
3. Baptism present
And amazingly, i get to recieve 1 more present! This was quite unexpected cause its from Tim and Abigail.. Ok la... Abigail maybe... But Tim?! Haha.. Anyway... I love the present very much! Just when i lacked a daily devotional material, this came. =D
I would have thought the daily bread was good for my everyday reading. I guess this is much cooler. As the picture below suggests, its 240 verses from the Word of God. I do like to think deep into his Words, but i do not have much to think about as my knowledge is really the tip of an iceberg. I guess this will spark off something for me. At least, i really hope so... I really promise i will use it.. Read one each day.
This is it! Thank you (Abby & Tim) so much! Was so embarrassing when i asked you(Abby) whose that(present) for when you gave me the present. Haha.. Was a bit lost. I really like it. =)
4. R/S
Oh well this isn't really about BGR problem as i'm still single. I'm not much of a talker and so i'll just pen down everything here. Daniel's getting engaged. I'm so happy for him. Really. I was shocked as i din even know he has a gf. But really, i think he's a really good guy and he should have a real happy and God loving family. He is the one guy i looked up toin terms of spiritual faith and i really try to be like him.
But he asked... "So kheng soon... When are you getting engaged?"
This question really really opened up my wounds again and it ached my heart physically. You know, its like you had your stitches removed and someone accidentally splitted it open again.
I answer, with a big smile," No la.. where got so fast.. I dun even have a gf..."
Yup.. He was referring to Ber.. I'm surprised he remembered though cause Ber only went to my church like once. Anyway... He realised it too.. I had broken up...
The next question was the more disturbing one... "Why?"
My friends, when i said i dunno.. I really meant it and its not a joke. I myself would like to tell you the reason too.. But i just din know... Maybe i hurt her too much? Maybe she likes someone else? Maybe she thinks we're not going to have a chance anymore? Different personality? Its a blur to me...
Everything was done on msn and i have never met her since.
When you ask me when am i going to get engaged, I would really love to answer it with a simple, "Soon..." But i guess.. Maybe it'll be never..
Oh well... I let you all know more about me.. I am a guy who really more when i'm alone. I dun want to tell much cause everything is so uncertain. You know... When you get into a relationship and it becomes so comfortable that you really think its gonna work out, you start thinking and preparing.
First thing.. You start to think of how to top each year's effort in celebrating her birthday. Its hard and i know that.. But the smile that you get, the hug that you might recieve.. It just doesn't matter how much effort you had to put in. As time went pass, you start to realise where is the place you frequent all the time and it becomes your classic "lao di fang". Its only unique to us... We had one... It was a flight of stairs that faces the carpark in suntec. We ould just buy a few packs of sushi, maybe shihlin, bubble tea and sit there and eat. We had our first dates there i think.. Its nothing romantic you know. No ambience or anything. Its just the person you are with..
Den it comes to some memorable things that you have done when you nv thought you could have done. For me it was the Fountain of Wealth dedication of song to her when we were in suntec. She thought it would be fun.. So i just did it. She thought i would just dedicate it to 31st.. No offense but haha... I dedicated to her in front of her. You guys will think that its no more romantic anymore since she saw everything and there's no surprise factor.. But you're wrong.. The look on her face when she saw me typed in her name... I knew i made the right choice. There wasn't much right choice in my life you know... This was one of them.. But this was what i dedicated..
To: Bernice Ho
From Kheng Soon
Message: I love you
Song: When you say nothing at all
I know i'm not much of a romantic. But i do love to be one. We waited at the fountain of wealth for the laser to show my message.. And maybe the song to play... Yup... At about 9pm, when we were ablout to give up, we heard the song starting... And the DJ actually read out my message.. She held my hand tight.. I thought i can really feel the happiness in her. It was all like the song suggests... When you say nothing at all.. We just hung around till the song passed..
I dunno if i told you all about this.. But its one of the time where i loved most.
You dun only think about dating stuff... You start thinking of how you might propose.. You starting thinking of a venue... You start thinking of what colours you wanna wear. You know... I think its just because i have become so old and that this was my first r/s that i am so committed to making things work. There are times when i even asked about your dream wedding... Like how you all pictured your wedding to be... But all these, i kept it to myself.. I din say anything.
So on this sunday... Ber decided to tell me that she don't feel like she knows me at all.. She asks me to tell her more about myself. I told her she had to make time for me. I guess i was too harsh about her commitments in JCRC and everything else was too much and she had no time for me, the only way for her was to breakup. I din't know what to do actually. To me, i felt that i did all that i can to make this r/s work.. I din't complain about anything seriously when she had too much things for her and too little time for me. I just din't understand.
So.. Friends... I know how i feel already. Its not just that i am really hurt and emotional. She din take any part of me from me... Its just that...
A part of me died from the breakup.
Haa Louelle... I think your advice won't work on me ba. I can't get over it. I can't forget it unless i get amnesia.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
After IPPT..
Can tell you all how dead tired i am right now.... Its 2335 already and i haven sleep. Just finish watching Tooth Fairy. Watched it before... But well, i think its really a good show and i like the story.=D
My IPPT results,
Score Pts
Sit Up: 38 4
Broad Jump: 226 3
Chin Up: 8 3
Shuttle Run: 9.9s 5
2.4km Run: 12.08min 2
Summary, I PASSED!
I have to admit that i din do my best for my chin up and sit up... Haha... Especially sit up, i din wanna tire my thighs out before i go to SBJ which is my nemesis and the 2.4km which has become my nemesis too.
I am very thankful for today! Plus i am really really glad and i wanna share my joy with everyone! I do not need to go RT phase 2 already!
Actually, my 2.4km result was like 12.23minutes where i failed with like 3 secs! That was like the worst thing that can happen you know... 3 secs!!! However, there was a 15secs shaving off my timing as they closed down lane 1 for a small section and acoording to the PTIs, its out of goodwill! So whoever needs the 15 secs to pass can just approach them!
Ok...Here's how it all happened. I clocked 1minute 30secs on the first round which was pretty fast for me. I knew i had to make up time for the later rounds cause i knew i would slow down. So, i tried to run as fast as i can and so i clocked a 1minute 45secs on the second round. The effort to clock as fast a time in the first 2 rounds finally took a toil on me and i started to clock 2 minutes as i was tired already. By 4th round, i was close to giving up cause i started eating into the spare time i made up in the first 2 rounds. And i was pretty dead tired. Dear friends, especially SHIMON, i even tried imagining angel chasing my behind to make me run faster... Gosh it worked for 50 metres... Haha... After that, i just have to keep psychoing myself that its mind over body.
After the grueling run, i saw the electronic board.. 12.23minutes!!!!! OMGOSH... I was like... WTF!!!!! Fail by 3 seconds?! Then, i remembered, 15 seconds shaving if i go see the PTI!!! Tired like a dog, i went for the time shaving and finally, i passed!!!! FOr about 5 minutes i couldn't walk and i just sat there.
Feeling good that i finally passed, i made my way to out-pro.... The result slip printed indicated that i failed! WITH a 2.4km timing of 12.23minutes! I WAS LIKE WTH!!!! I went back to the counter and they took a freaking long time to check for me... Gosh.. I was damn tired and i had to wait?! Finally, the clerk came to me, wrote 12.48 on my slip and said that 12.48 was my original timing and that 12.23 was the shaved timing... OMGosh!!!!! I was puzzled and furious! The electronic board showed 12.23 when i ran pass!
"Oh shit" was all i can think of.... Should i accept my fate and go for phase 2 or should i go reason it out????
Somehow, i went to the track to clear things out... Finally, they checked again and wrote 12.08minutes on my slip. WALAO!!!! Thats 12 sessions of RT which i might have gone through lo! If i hadn't checked.
Lesson learnt today:
1. God will never forsake you if you are really lost and nervous.
The IPPT started in a real FML way as it was raining cats and dogs even before i can get to Khatib camp. Result? my jeans and half my shirt was drenched even when i had a functional umbrella! To top that, my shoes were soaked and my feet were like a submarine in my shoes! Thank God, i keep telling Him that i wanna pass my IPPT today... And he stopped the rain... I was so nervous about sit ups cause even though i can do 40, my thighs would really chui as i have a bad habit of using my thigh muscles for all 40 sit ups. I heed Shimon's advice and tried doing them all with my core muscles... YAY! I did! And yes louelle, i might get my 6 packs soon. =D. Secondly came the SBJ... It was really a breeze... 226 on both tries. On the first time, i got 226 and i am assured. =D At that time, i thought to myself, Thank God.... You let me pass my statics with a silver. =D
2. Not by your own effort, but by your faith and His grace...
2.4km was killing me. I needed to pass it. Frankly, The closed down portion of lane 1 was really small and i think it wouldn't have changed my timing much. BUT, this awesome thing has to happen! 12.23minutes... I wasn't good enough... But i kept telling God," God please please help me for i am doing my best already!" Yup... That was about when i was running the 4th round as i started to think of giving up. I guess, His grace is indeed boundless you know... BUT... I thought, if i had given up, He wouldn't be able to work his miracles on me. You keep your faith! By preparing the fields so He may see your faith in waiting for His miracles and thus He will put His ultimate plan into play! I am really touched by His grace and His lesson... 12.23inutes... He really made it in this way that i can't pass with my own effort... 3 secs... But i guess, He heard my prayers and waited to see if i am faithful to wait for His miracles.. His grace ensured my pass of 12.08minutes...
Come to think of it... The PTI announced the 15s shaving before we started running! That means... He din wait to test if i was being faithful before He showers me with his grace! He endowed it on me before i knew it. I hope i did not disappoint Him... Cause He has not disappointed me. He was faithful to me. =)
3. Ye man of little faith! Face each challenge knowing God is by your side! Do not forget.
For this, i referred to the time shaving incident where the admin screwed up. After i got all my timings right and printed the PASSING result slip, i thought to myself," Hmmm... Somehow i lost my faith in the Lord when faced with a challenge..."
Somehow, i can hear Him shouting to me,"Ye man of little faith! Do you not trust in me?!"
I was quite ashamed as i flinched. Imagine if i had lost all my faith and accepted the fact that i failed, i would be blaming God and gained RT sessions. Phew... At least i got everything straighten out huh... =D
After all, if God meant you to pass your IPPT, who can stop Him if you believe and put in your best?
Ok... I'm really tired... Gotta sleep. Feel the love from our Father. He's out there watching... Even when it means that He unleash an epic rain to drench you up before you take your IPPT.
After all, God is Good! Right? =) Amen..
Can tell you all how dead tired i am right now.... Its 2335 already and i haven sleep. Just finish watching Tooth Fairy. Watched it before... But well, i think its really a good show and i like the story.=D
My IPPT results,
Score Pts
Sit Up: 38 4
Broad Jump: 226 3
Chin Up: 8 3
Shuttle Run: 9.9s 5
2.4km Run: 12.08min 2
Summary, I PASSED!
I have to admit that i din do my best for my chin up and sit up... Haha... Especially sit up, i din wanna tire my thighs out before i go to SBJ which is my nemesis and the 2.4km which has become my nemesis too.
I am very thankful for today! Plus i am really really glad and i wanna share my joy with everyone! I do not need to go RT phase 2 already!
Actually, my 2.4km result was like 12.23minutes where i failed with like 3 secs! That was like the worst thing that can happen you know... 3 secs!!! However, there was a 15secs shaving off my timing as they closed down lane 1 for a small section and acoording to the PTIs, its out of goodwill! So whoever needs the 15 secs to pass can just approach them!
Ok...Here's how it all happened. I clocked 1minute 30secs on the first round which was pretty fast for me. I knew i had to make up time for the later rounds cause i knew i would slow down. So, i tried to run as fast as i can and so i clocked a 1minute 45secs on the second round. The effort to clock as fast a time in the first 2 rounds finally took a toil on me and i started to clock 2 minutes as i was tired already. By 4th round, i was close to giving up cause i started eating into the spare time i made up in the first 2 rounds. And i was pretty dead tired. Dear friends, especially SHIMON, i even tried imagining angel chasing my behind to make me run faster... Gosh it worked for 50 metres... Haha... After that, i just have to keep psychoing myself that its mind over body.
After the grueling run, i saw the electronic board.. 12.23minutes!!!!! OMGOSH... I was like... WTF!!!!! Fail by 3 seconds?! Then, i remembered, 15 seconds shaving if i go see the PTI!!! Tired like a dog, i went for the time shaving and finally, i passed!!!! FOr about 5 minutes i couldn't walk and i just sat there.
Feeling good that i finally passed, i made my way to out-pro.... The result slip printed indicated that i failed! WITH a 2.4km timing of 12.23minutes! I WAS LIKE WTH!!!! I went back to the counter and they took a freaking long time to check for me... Gosh.. I was damn tired and i had to wait?! Finally, the clerk came to me, wrote 12.48 on my slip and said that 12.48 was my original timing and that 12.23 was the shaved timing... OMGosh!!!!! I was puzzled and furious! The electronic board showed 12.23 when i ran pass!
"Oh shit" was all i can think of.... Should i accept my fate and go for phase 2 or should i go reason it out????
Somehow, i went to the track to clear things out... Finally, they checked again and wrote 12.08minutes on my slip. WALAO!!!! Thats 12 sessions of RT which i might have gone through lo! If i hadn't checked.
Lesson learnt today:
1. God will never forsake you if you are really lost and nervous.
The IPPT started in a real FML way as it was raining cats and dogs even before i can get to Khatib camp. Result? my jeans and half my shirt was drenched even when i had a functional umbrella! To top that, my shoes were soaked and my feet were like a submarine in my shoes! Thank God, i keep telling Him that i wanna pass my IPPT today... And he stopped the rain... I was so nervous about sit ups cause even though i can do 40, my thighs would really chui as i have a bad habit of using my thigh muscles for all 40 sit ups. I heed Shimon's advice and tried doing them all with my core muscles... YAY! I did! And yes louelle, i might get my 6 packs soon. =D. Secondly came the SBJ... It was really a breeze... 226 on both tries. On the first time, i got 226 and i am assured. =D At that time, i thought to myself, Thank God.... You let me pass my statics with a silver. =D
2. Not by your own effort, but by your faith and His grace...
2.4km was killing me. I needed to pass it. Frankly, The closed down portion of lane 1 was really small and i think it wouldn't have changed my timing much. BUT, this awesome thing has to happen! 12.23minutes... I wasn't good enough... But i kept telling God," God please please help me for i am doing my best already!" Yup... That was about when i was running the 4th round as i started to think of giving up. I guess, His grace is indeed boundless you know... BUT... I thought, if i had given up, He wouldn't be able to work his miracles on me. You keep your faith! By preparing the fields so He may see your faith in waiting for His miracles and thus He will put His ultimate plan into play! I am really touched by His grace and His lesson... 12.23inutes... He really made it in this way that i can't pass with my own effort... 3 secs... But i guess, He heard my prayers and waited to see if i am faithful to wait for His miracles.. His grace ensured my pass of 12.08minutes...
Come to think of it... The PTI announced the 15s shaving before we started running! That means... He din wait to test if i was being faithful before He showers me with his grace! He endowed it on me before i knew it. I hope i did not disappoint Him... Cause He has not disappointed me. He was faithful to me. =)
3. Ye man of little faith! Face each challenge knowing God is by your side! Do not forget.
For this, i referred to the time shaving incident where the admin screwed up. After i got all my timings right and printed the PASSING result slip, i thought to myself," Hmmm... Somehow i lost my faith in the Lord when faced with a challenge..."
Somehow, i can hear Him shouting to me,"Ye man of little faith! Do you not trust in me?!"
I was quite ashamed as i flinched. Imagine if i had lost all my faith and accepted the fact that i failed, i would be blaming God and gained RT sessions. Phew... At least i got everything straighten out huh... =D
After all, if God meant you to pass your IPPT, who can stop Him if you believe and put in your best?
Ok... I'm really tired... Gotta sleep. Feel the love from our Father. He's out there watching... Even when it means that He unleash an epic rain to drench you up before you take your IPPT.
After all, God is Good! Right? =) Amen..
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Tues is my sign language day!
Today's sign class was good! Its still like revision from what shimon has taught before but its great!
My interest grows weaker as time goes by cause i don't really like the idea of doing a class alone cause i have no one to talk to. It sucks especially when its a language course and you need to practise with someone! DON'T MENTION ANGEL PLS..
ok some rambling,
Actually she din't attend class today. God knows what happened. I was on the other hand a bit relieved cause i am finally freed from the burden of making an effort to sit with her and to talk to her. You guys don't know her. So you all do not know how irritating it is you know. You make the effort to sit with her but she gives you the "i'm not comfortable sitting with you so pls don't sit here" look. Oh gosh... Next you try to talk to her and she just gives you the smiley look and says nothing. Hello Friend! When someone makes the effort to try to be nice or at least be a friend, then you try not to be so irritating la. Oh well.. All needed to be done was done before.
So as i said, i felt a burden relieved cause she wasn't here. I can go sit with other classmates and maybe make friends. Class was as usual.. Shirley was really good and patient with us. Think i started loving to sign cause like Shimon, i think i can express myself better in actions.
As the lesson ended, i had to wait for Shimon to go home together and so for the short while, i turned on "So you would come" and started trying to sign the song. The song was fast but i just tried to sign whatever words i heard. Whatever i din't know, i would just check the dictionary. I hope one day, i would be able to sign a song in church during praise and worship.
Shimon's passion in serving a deaf community has rub off a bit on me. I am damn interested and excited! Yet i am alone and helpless now. At least i think i am on the right track now? Since i started BS1. He speaks of how stressed it gets and yet the sense of accomplishment he gets by serving. I am envious seriously.
Mr Ong fb msged me this morning... He has invited me to become a befriender(announcer) in the youth service. I am willing to serve... But this requires me to stand in front of a service and talk. Seriously i'm not a fan of public speaking. BUT why does he see that i have this "talent"? I am nervous most of the time and maybe that is why i cracked jokes! Anyway... I really dunno. If it were ushering, i would have said yes straight away.
Dear Lord, am i ready? Is this how you might want to prepare me before i can be prepared to serve like Shimon as an interpreter and to even start a deaf community.
I know these are all talks. Its really easier if there's someone before you who you can follow. Can i be the one who leads? I haven reply yet. I feel the calling so i really want to say yes. Yet i am nervous. I do not want to say no yet am scared to say yes.
ok... Sleep beckons. Dear God please enlighten me in my sleep. =D
Today's sign class was good! Its still like revision from what shimon has taught before but its great!
My interest grows weaker as time goes by cause i don't really like the idea of doing a class alone cause i have no one to talk to. It sucks especially when its a language course and you need to practise with someone! DON'T MENTION ANGEL PLS..
ok some rambling,
Actually she din't attend class today. God knows what happened. I was on the other hand a bit relieved cause i am finally freed from the burden of making an effort to sit with her and to talk to her. You guys don't know her. So you all do not know how irritating it is you know. You make the effort to sit with her but she gives you the "i'm not comfortable sitting with you so pls don't sit here" look. Oh gosh... Next you try to talk to her and she just gives you the smiley look and says nothing. Hello Friend! When someone makes the effort to try to be nice or at least be a friend, then you try not to be so irritating la. Oh well.. All needed to be done was done before.
So as i said, i felt a burden relieved cause she wasn't here. I can go sit with other classmates and maybe make friends. Class was as usual.. Shirley was really good and patient with us. Think i started loving to sign cause like Shimon, i think i can express myself better in actions.
As the lesson ended, i had to wait for Shimon to go home together and so for the short while, i turned on "So you would come" and started trying to sign the song. The song was fast but i just tried to sign whatever words i heard. Whatever i din't know, i would just check the dictionary. I hope one day, i would be able to sign a song in church during praise and worship.
Shimon's passion in serving a deaf community has rub off a bit on me. I am damn interested and excited! Yet i am alone and helpless now. At least i think i am on the right track now? Since i started BS1. He speaks of how stressed it gets and yet the sense of accomplishment he gets by serving. I am envious seriously.
Mr Ong fb msged me this morning... He has invited me to become a befriender(announcer) in the youth service. I am willing to serve... But this requires me to stand in front of a service and talk. Seriously i'm not a fan of public speaking. BUT why does he see that i have this "talent"? I am nervous most of the time and maybe that is why i cracked jokes! Anyway... I really dunno. If it were ushering, i would have said yes straight away.
Dear Lord, am i ready? Is this how you might want to prepare me before i can be prepared to serve like Shimon as an interpreter and to even start a deaf community.
I know these are all talks. Its really easier if there's someone before you who you can follow. Can i be the one who leads? I haven reply yet. I feel the calling so i really want to say yes. Yet i am nervous. I do not want to say no yet am scared to say yes.
ok... Sleep beckons. Dear God please enlighten me in my sleep. =D
Monday, April 12, 2010
Fireproof is a movie which was intro-ed by Tim to me. Its a christian movie that aims to save marriages. I am guessing that it works well for BGR too.
The show is really good. Firemen action like Ladder 49 and yet still so many lessons to be learnt. One thing that struck my mind just as i thought i was going to sleep.
The inner desires of your heart. The ones that are deep down.. The darkest ones which you thought of when you're alone. When you think no one is looking... There's only one word to decribe those desires...
Yes... Parasites.
As the name suggests, they feed on you. It doesn't matter if you only think of them and not do anything. They feed on you slowly till finally you just don't care anymore. The scariest thing isn't what these parasites make you do, its the God in you that they feed on!
I just had this moment of brilliance as i took out my present. The cross that is made up of 3 nails... These nails that are fashioned to pierce our saviour to the cross. This parasites actually feeds on your faith. Everytime you fail to get rid of these leeches of faith, they suck you dry and leave you feeling guilty. At the end of this long parasitic life, the ones faithful person you are will be left with nothing but extreme guilt and shame that you dun even have the faith to come to the Lord even when his grace is boundless.
Ok... I regret really that i din really put my lessons from fireproof in my previous r/s and i guess that's how it broke down. I bought the book too! But i failed to use it.
The second lesson from this show i will not forget. And so will you who are reading this too! Be a faithful man/woman! By this, COMMAND all parasites to leave you alone with God! So you may grow in faith and enjoy yourself in His ever abundant grace and love!
Here i command all parasites! In His name! To leave my friends and me alone! Leave you evil one! AMEN!
The show is really good. Firemen action like Ladder 49 and yet still so many lessons to be learnt. One thing that struck my mind just as i thought i was going to sleep.
The inner desires of your heart. The ones that are deep down.. The darkest ones which you thought of when you're alone. When you think no one is looking... There's only one word to decribe those desires...
Yes... Parasites.
As the name suggests, they feed on you. It doesn't matter if you only think of them and not do anything. They feed on you slowly till finally you just don't care anymore. The scariest thing isn't what these parasites make you do, its the God in you that they feed on!
I just had this moment of brilliance as i took out my present. The cross that is made up of 3 nails... These nails that are fashioned to pierce our saviour to the cross. This parasites actually feeds on your faith. Everytime you fail to get rid of these leeches of faith, they suck you dry and leave you feeling guilty. At the end of this long parasitic life, the ones faithful person you are will be left with nothing but extreme guilt and shame that you dun even have the faith to come to the Lord even when his grace is boundless.
Ok... I regret really that i din really put my lessons from fireproof in my previous r/s and i guess that's how it broke down. I bought the book too! But i failed to use it.
The second lesson from this show i will not forget. And so will you who are reading this too! Be a faithful man/woman! By this, COMMAND all parasites to leave you alone with God! So you may grow in faith and enjoy yourself in His ever abundant grace and love!
Here i command all parasites! In His name! To leave my friends and me alone! Leave you evil one! AMEN!
Sunday, April 11, 2010
As led and commanded by Jesus, we are to do this for the remembrance of him... For this is the new covenant forged by His blood for us.
I had my first Holy Communion today after my Baptism. =D Sanctification totally rocks. I am still a bit lost as to what i should do and whatever though its already taught in the baptism class. Haha... Nevertheless, i guess this takes time to get used to. After drink the wine, i was lost too as i din't know where to place the empty glasses. Luckily kit saw me from behind being lost and brought me. Hahaha... First time i guessed..=D
Church is undergoing renovation soon! We saw the future look of the sanctuary on powerpoint. Its is gonna be so cool! With accoustic walls and everything. I think it'll look like a amphitheatre. No worries! The good old cross will still be there in the middle of the altar! The other place that is going to be renovated is the roof where we always have our BBQs! They are gonna build another "sanctuary" hall on the entire floor! Den it'll look like a concert hall or something with cushion seats! How cool is that man... I'm really glad that my church is really upgrading. =D
On the other hand... I like the sanctuary. It gives me the feeling that i am in a traditional church. If its gonna change, the old school feeling is no more! I should really treasure the moments i will have left. Nevertheless, my church is goona be so COOL!
It is only today that i know my church actually houses so many members! I'm even astonished that our church on the Lutheran side has 2000++ members! And that includes me! Woah... I always thought its just the few hundred maybe. And on the Anglican side, 5000+! I mean... Isn't it amazing? YCCL has always gave me the cosy feeling that everyone knows everyone and that even if you do not know everyone, they'll recognise you! That is how close this community is. I am so happy to be part of this. As a first generation christian, i do admit i am not as familiar or closely knitted in the relationship in the church where my friends have parents who are friends in the church! However, i can still feel so close to YCCL. I guess i have to thank my officers as we have our own core group. What's more is the many youths who i know! It's always pleasing when we can say "Peace be with you" to each other in service.
Oh well... Most of the time, i would have left church and had lunch with kit... Even when Tim asks us to eat together, we'll decline as we're not really used to eating with his DG. Today's different. I acually had lunch with them. Hmm... I'm quite amazed myself... Out of the group, I know Chris, Mark, Lincoln.... Not so much of Solomon as i have never had a chance to talk to him yet. Today's not an exception though. Somehow, Mark was sitting with me and kit and we talked. He's actually working for VCF. I am really amazed. I guess, everytime i catch up with someone, its really an eye opener. What amazed me more is that he actually cracked kit to talking to him! The usual anti social kit in church.. Omgosh... I am so totally lost for words that i just looked and smiled listening to them talk programming. Come to think of it... This must be God's doing man.
My first DG after baptism... Before baptism, dg was always a "non-core requirement" for me... However, i always wake and attend dg on 99.9% of the time. Cause i felt that, i really want to be a man of God. On the 0.01%, the evil had his way... Of telling me that i can SLEEP more and MOUSEHUNT more!
Now that i'm a new me. I cannot let this happen! However, it becomes an obligation if i do not have the motivation and went for dg just because it is a core requirement! As much as i want to grow in faith, i want to have my thirst for His word grow too! Only then will i attend dg and make it fulfilling! And only then, will i be more attentive in church! Gosh...
Today's lesson in dg... Authorship of the first five books of the bible, Genesis to Deuteronomy.. He was Moses. Knowing whoever wrote the word of God is really really important. It's our core foundation in which we put our beliefs in! If we do not probe, we wouldn't know if our laws, our beliefs and our teachings are right! The following series in our dg is a series of learning of the book of Deuteronomy. I am gonna lead the lesson for the second time soon in May i guess. Excited. Nervous. Scared.
Moses was a man of great faith. By faith in Him, he did not flinch when we was facing the Pharaoh.. By faith, he carried out others during the Passover and the Israelite firstborns were saved. By faith he lead his men into the desert and walked round and round before reaching the promised land. Now the question is... How can i be like him?
I always tell others to pray and believe. Sometimes its really hard to do this actually. Some times you succeed, sometimes you just fail. You are just being faithful and praying and believing. But this comes the Evil one who comes along and whispers in your ear! You get thrown off your feet! He waits till you are the most vulnerable and takes his chance. Do we believe in God still? or do we think that we are our drivers of our own destiny? That is why, faith is very very important to me. Without it, Kheng Soon will be akin to a man lost in the Minotaur maze waiting to be devoured.
I like to write about this stuff cause its a constant reminder to myself and all. Its all the thoughts i put in. YES!
Faith is gained by believing! It is done through praying sincerely! It is not only waiting for God's miracle, but also preparing to recieve it! This is very hard. There's nothing you can see, nothing you can touch, there may be nothing that you can experience too! Blessed be the ones who did not see and believed! That is what he told Thomas. I do not want to be like Thomas. I want to be like Moses.
Come to think of it, i would have choose the name Moses straight away if i did not have so many friends named Moses.
Ok...
RT today was ok... Cat 1 all the way so we did statics. Thurs is IPPT. Hope God would help me... Put wings on my shoes! So i may jump and run!
I am also so tempted to buy PS3... Cause i really want to play rockband! And Guitar hero! Crap crap... So little you can do with no money.. Haha...
Hao le hao le... I need to get down to studying also soon. HR is gonna shred me apart.
Work tml... I can see that tomorrow is gonna be a lethargic "i dun wanna do anything" day... Well.. I'll see how it goes...
I am listening to BoA now. Hmmm.. Seems to sound real nice... Maybe its cause its in japanese... I'm really not a fan of her english songs. After so many years of listening to here jap and kor songs, the old school is still the best. =D
Today was good. Though i woke up at about 0830 but i only got out of bed at around 0930. First thing, i had the horn sounding started. And then i see louelle's sms.. Haa... Don't worry la... I won't throw them away one.. Most of them are in my drawer. Wait till i get a box ba. Haha.. Den i can deposit everything inside.
Louelle! I'm having greeen teaaa. =)
I literally just slacked the whole day away today... Told myself i had to read something but in the end, i only read 3 pages of a HR reading... That is major pathetic man. Watched a couple of movies from Tom365 as well as caught up with The Pacific... Movies i watched.... Truman show... Confessions of a shopaholic.. I forgot the other one already. The Pacific is good.. Seriously... HBO miniseries totally rocks... That goes for Band of Brothers too.
Anyway... There's dg tml morning before service.. Gosh... Gotta wake up early again... But not as bad as weekdays i guess.. RT tml too. Sharks... I need a How to pass your IPPT in 5 days book.. Haha... I don't want RT phase 2!!!!
Woo... S.E.S... Sounds nice also...
Today was good. Though i woke up at about 0830 but i only got out of bed at around 0930. First thing, i had the horn sounding started. And then i see louelle's sms.. Haa... Don't worry la... I won't throw them away one.. Most of them are in my drawer. Wait till i get a box ba. Haha.. Den i can deposit everything inside.
Louelle! I'm having greeen teaaa. =)
I literally just slacked the whole day away today... Told myself i had to read something but in the end, i only read 3 pages of a HR reading... That is major pathetic man. Watched a couple of movies from Tom365 as well as caught up with The Pacific... Movies i watched.... Truman show... Confessions of a shopaholic.. I forgot the other one already. The Pacific is good.. Seriously... HBO miniseries totally rocks... That goes for Band of Brothers too.
Anyway... There's dg tml morning before service.. Gosh... Gotta wake up early again... But not as bad as weekdays i guess.. RT tml too. Sharks... I need a How to pass your IPPT in 5 days book.. Haha... I don't want RT phase 2!!!!
Woo... S.E.S... Sounds nice also...
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Hmmm...
Been trying to revamp my blog with a new blogskin... The thing is, i cannot or rather have no time to find a decent one... Haha.. Guess i'll just make do with this one first.
This week has been hectic. I was sick last week. Thank God i have recovered.
Activities this week:
1. HR presentation.
I was so nervous cause my mind was fixated on keeping to my 3 minutes for my 7 slides in the whole presentation as the whole group only had 20 minutes. Seriously i hope i din't screw up too much as i thought i did stutter a lot. However, the thing is, Shimon said he din't hear me stutter at all. Guess my mind was playing tricks on me huh... Haha...
2. Basic Sign 1
Gosh.. I wouldn't know what will happen when Shimon and Janis finish their AS2. That is their final sign lesson already and i am only just starting mine. Sylvia was there but i guess she just wanna act like she don't know me and stay with her friends. Hmmm... Actually i don't know what she is thinking. I reckon i can just not bother about her anymore. =D Don't need to waste my effort to try to be nice to her. Shirley is my instructor. Shimon said she was good. I though so too after the lesson. Maybe if i am better, i will try to "talk" to her after lessons. For now, i should just practise more.
3. RT
Statics and 30/60 for 1.2km. The static exercises were tough. With all the leg raise, bridging, alternate leg thrust... At least i had my pride to complete them all. I still want to be fit. Next thurs is the IPPT. Gosh i need to pass that. I don't want RT! Yes Louelle i will get 6 packs too.
4. Clash of the Titans outing.
TGIF! Dinner with George, Nat, Wenhao, Roy and Khai... After which we went for the movie while George went off. Movie was ok only. Expected better. Company was great though! =D
*Caution* Dear friends... I'm gonna rant. Its depressing.
Oh man. I just realise i have too many reminders around me. Too many things i should have kept. As i turn my head, i see this 4 sticky pads from long ago...
1. Hello!
2. ^.^
3. Supper?
2230k?
4. My treat!
=D
This was done and pasted on my laptop when i was in school. I thought it was sweet and so i left it on.. So the next day, messages were written on the right side of the 4 pads...
1. Bleah!
2. Morning!
3. =D
4. <3 u!
=P
Hmmm.... I should have thrown them away long ago! I can't... Our couple keychains... Her notes... And lastly... Our pictures that are still on my phone. I know i have to get rid of these things someday. But the thought kills me..
Suntec City is a place i do not wish to visit soon again also. So lets have our outings far away from there ? =)
Maybe wenhao is right huh... I think i'm quite hurt. Haa... This sucks.
To be honest, it feels sucky that she can forget better and faster than me. Totally sucks. ='(
Oh well...
Just when i thought that there's a person who would promise to witness my life in this world. She gave up on me.
Volleyball recreation club next sem... Should i? With Shimon... Wah.. To be frank its a bit sian to see couples. Tiring. Haha... Its every saturday in Sentosa....
Wenhao is right about male pms though. Just that i choose a more literature way now when i do not have squash to vent it out. Ar ok.... Maybe... Selective amnesia is good. Just erase this whole episode from my mind! And maybe her too so i don't make a fool of myself. The one to forget completely...
I don't have a Godly self today... Only a mood of emoing. No worries. I will still cheer up everyday!
Sylvia is too nice to the point where she creeps me out. While i am trying my best to fight my emotional turmoils, i have no strength left for her. I'll try to be nice only when she doesn't creep me out. If not... Don't say that i am trying to be bad to her. I just do not have the energy to be bothered anymore.
Argh... I should sleep so... Getting depressed as the night goes... Haa... And so if you see my rant here... That's actually how i'm feeling la. I can't voice them out. So be a dear friend and continue your already good job of avoiding the topic of Bernice k. Talk about Isabel and wenhao i will be more excited.
That's all for now!
Song playing now on my itunes... Worthy is the Lamb... Amen!
Been trying to revamp my blog with a new blogskin... The thing is, i cannot or rather have no time to find a decent one... Haha.. Guess i'll just make do with this one first.
This week has been hectic. I was sick last week. Thank God i have recovered.
Activities this week:
1. HR presentation.
I was so nervous cause my mind was fixated on keeping to my 3 minutes for my 7 slides in the whole presentation as the whole group only had 20 minutes. Seriously i hope i din't screw up too much as i thought i did stutter a lot. However, the thing is, Shimon said he din't hear me stutter at all. Guess my mind was playing tricks on me huh... Haha...
2. Basic Sign 1
Gosh.. I wouldn't know what will happen when Shimon and Janis finish their AS2. That is their final sign lesson already and i am only just starting mine. Sylvia was there but i guess she just wanna act like she don't know me and stay with her friends. Hmmm... Actually i don't know what she is thinking. I reckon i can just not bother about her anymore. =D Don't need to waste my effort to try to be nice to her. Shirley is my instructor. Shimon said she was good. I though so too after the lesson. Maybe if i am better, i will try to "talk" to her after lessons. For now, i should just practise more.
3. RT
Statics and 30/60 for 1.2km. The static exercises were tough. With all the leg raise, bridging, alternate leg thrust... At least i had my pride to complete them all. I still want to be fit. Next thurs is the IPPT. Gosh i need to pass that. I don't want RT! Yes Louelle i will get 6 packs too.
4. Clash of the Titans outing.
TGIF! Dinner with George, Nat, Wenhao, Roy and Khai... After which we went for the movie while George went off. Movie was ok only. Expected better. Company was great though! =D
*Caution* Dear friends... I'm gonna rant. Its depressing.
Oh man. I just realise i have too many reminders around me. Too many things i should have kept. As i turn my head, i see this 4 sticky pads from long ago...
1. Hello!
2. ^.^
3. Supper?
2230k?
4. My treat!
=D
This was done and pasted on my laptop when i was in school. I thought it was sweet and so i left it on.. So the next day, messages were written on the right side of the 4 pads...
1. Bleah!
2. Morning!
3. =D
4. <3 u!
=P
Hmmm.... I should have thrown them away long ago! I can't... Our couple keychains... Her notes... And lastly... Our pictures that are still on my phone. I know i have to get rid of these things someday. But the thought kills me..
Suntec City is a place i do not wish to visit soon again also. So lets have our outings far away from there ? =)
Maybe wenhao is right huh... I think i'm quite hurt. Haa... This sucks.
To be honest, it feels sucky that she can forget better and faster than me. Totally sucks. ='(
Oh well...
Just when i thought that there's a person who would promise to witness my life in this world. She gave up on me.
Volleyball recreation club next sem... Should i? With Shimon... Wah.. To be frank its a bit sian to see couples. Tiring. Haha... Its every saturday in Sentosa....
Wenhao is right about male pms though. Just that i choose a more literature way now when i do not have squash to vent it out. Ar ok.... Maybe... Selective amnesia is good. Just erase this whole episode from my mind! And maybe her too so i don't make a fool of myself. The one to forget completely...
I don't have a Godly self today... Only a mood of emoing. No worries. I will still cheer up everyday!
Sylvia is too nice to the point where she creeps me out. While i am trying my best to fight my emotional turmoils, i have no strength left for her. I'll try to be nice only when she doesn't creep me out. If not... Don't say that i am trying to be bad to her. I just do not have the energy to be bothered anymore.
Argh... I should sleep so... Getting depressed as the night goes... Haa... And so if you see my rant here... That's actually how i'm feeling la. I can't voice them out. So be a dear friend and continue your already good job of avoiding the topic of Bernice k. Talk about Isabel and wenhao i will be more excited.
That's all for now!
Song playing now on my itunes... Worthy is the Lamb... Amen!
Monday, April 05, 2010
First day into my life as a complete Christian.
What my pastor say is totally true... Being a sinner is so much easier and it only comes with a naughty thought. Haha... I'll let your imaginations run wild but you'll get what i mean. Being a saint is so hard! Haha... I'm not depressed people... =D But ya... I've been wondering... During the Holy Communion, we are sanctified by His Holy Spirit... For about the few seconds before we think again. Haha... My pastors are quite lorsoh... But they are really humorous and wise.
Today, i received another gift from my friend, Shimon.... In fact... He's Shimon Aaron John Poh Chong Wen... Gosh.. That just took 5 secs for me to type out his name. Its a handmade rosary! Its this blue nylon string that is hand tied with a cross at the end. Woah... The first time i see it... Its really cool! First thing was that i was wondering how the thing was tied. The next, i was questioning about what, how, where and whatever question i can ask Shimon... Its supposed to be like a tool for praying for Catholics. How cool right?! I know i'm a Lutheran... But how cool is that! I decided to ask for one too... And yay! I got it.... He gave me a brochure on how to use the rosary... I'm supposed to pray with the rosary different prayers on each day of the week. Hmmm... Since i dun have a habit of praying everyday, maybe my fascination in this rosary will help me get started!
I am in quite a good mood today. =D I mean i am normally very tired and emo by this time of the day.. But i'm not.. Hahaha... Hmmm... What shall i talk about?
Actually... I got pretty worried.. Matthew Linus announced the people who were in the Good range and Average range for the CA... I was in neither. Gosh... This is like the worst news ever cos HR2002 is a core module! Hmmm.. I really hope i can finish reading all the readings though... I want at least a B+.... I want an A! Maybe i should start praying for it huh...
On work... Its really never-ending... Shimon and me are having no breaks le. Work just comes from all directions. For today, we have 4 jobs from 4 different people! I mean... How worse can this get? And everything is of priority... >.< Oh well... Seriously, if they just rush us like that with so many words, i will just give them the rushed results. They asked for it.
I have been thinking. If i do not want to be a materials engineer, what can i do? I mean its all ideal that i get a MBA after my grad and then do business related stuff, but is it going to work out? I know Shimon definitely wants to be a chef. Me? Am i going to settle with a materials engineer job and try to get started with my life? That's really a bad plan to have no plan. But what do i want to do?
A policeman? A doctor? A pilot? Seriously.... These are the only 3 ambitions that i have thought of. Being a police officer sounds like enlisting myself into the army again.... I'm not that bright enough to be a doctor... I have fear of heights... But its so damn cool to be a pilot! For now, only being a pilot seems possible for me. How how.... What is Your master plan for me?
There's so many things i want to learn too! Argh... There's just so many things! I want to learn drums. I want to learn Sax... I want to fully learn how to play a guitar. I have completed none!
The only thing that i am proud of myself now is that i am learning sign language. Its so frustrating cause i can't find someone to take it with me. And i have started! Having a companion is so important cause you can then practise with him or her! Haiz... Honestly, i feel weird to take it with "Angel"... But... Sharks... Anyway... BS1 is starting tml. I've been looking forward to this class.. But somehow the feeling is mixed now since i really feel a bit uncomfortable with .... Heng Shimon and Janis will be around when we go to SADeaf. Call me a skeptic.. I am really not used to a person treating me this good. Unless you are my gf or bff or friend that i know for a while... Please... I'm not trying to be bad but it really gives me goosebumps.
Everyone in church has started to call me Ken! Of course, besides the church administrator, Louelle you are still the first person to call me Ken. Haha... Think i am starting to respond to this name. Haha... Who else... Hmm... Abigail? haha... If you are reading this... And Verena.... Maybe i should explain a bit on why the name, Ken? My pet name was Kenken... My aunts and uncles calls me by that pet name since i was young and can even start remembering anything. So ya... Cut it short.. KEN! Seems like my BB officers got a shock too! Haha.. They din't know that i added Ken into my name... Haha.. Guess i gave everyone a surprise! =D
I am thankful. I want to give thanks to the Lord... For He really did his work for me. The BB officers who He planted around me. The BB company in which i really loved. The officers who watched me grow up... The seniors who groomed me... Haa... The Captain who i was so very scared off.. I felt so proud really! When Mr Ong said that he's really happy to see me and Andrew get baptised. I can sincerely feel his joy you know... He's really a person i respect a lot. I am so happy just from the fact that he's happy for me! I was his lamb and he was a shepherd maybe. =D I know that they really want me to go back to help out in BB. But i've gotta take a step at a time.. And i am very tired from my schedule now... I need my sit back and stare into space time.... Its my rest time... I need my cartoon time too. I promise i will try to... I promise..
I would like to give thanks for my buddies too! My BB buddies for 10 years. Tim, Jack and Kit.. I won't have survived in BB if it weren't for them. Lets just say that my life won't be so enriching and enjoyable in sec school if i didn't know them. Whatever... There's really nothing i can say to describe our friendship. =D
Louelle! I guess you made me grow the most in His Words with your constant passage quotes. =D AND also... You motherload of songs! Gosh... =D Seeing you so in love with God... Makes me jealous... Hahaha... I want to be like that too!
Hmmm.... Oh ya... Church camp comms.. I guess i really grew the most in faith and sense of belonging when i am serving in the church camp! Weiyong ar... ABIGAIL!!!! Daniel Yeo.... There's many people.... GUOQUAN... Don't say i keep niaoing you.. Haha... Haiya! I really think we should have church camp every year. My faith is really reaffirmed every year cause of that. =D
Edwin John Ferroa! You are da man who taught me about faith when i have none! With you Catholic teachings, i asked and you answered. You told me a lot to your understanding and maybe the Holy Spirit used you as a vessel that i may understand and build my own faith. I really give Him thanks that i have got you in army... Where my faith started growing.
Lastly.... You who enforced me to read the bible... You were tough on me and i was indeed quite lazy... Thanks to you i finished a gospel at least... Hmmm... Well...
Hmmm... Hahaa. I guess this is for today! I have typed quite a lot. =D
Wee! A rosary.... I am fascinated.. Really...
What my pastor say is totally true... Being a sinner is so much easier and it only comes with a naughty thought. Haha... I'll let your imaginations run wild but you'll get what i mean. Being a saint is so hard! Haha... I'm not depressed people... =D But ya... I've been wondering... During the Holy Communion, we are sanctified by His Holy Spirit... For about the few seconds before we think again. Haha... My pastors are quite lorsoh... But they are really humorous and wise.
Today, i received another gift from my friend, Shimon.... In fact... He's Shimon Aaron John Poh Chong Wen... Gosh.. That just took 5 secs for me to type out his name. Its a handmade rosary! Its this blue nylon string that is hand tied with a cross at the end. Woah... The first time i see it... Its really cool! First thing was that i was wondering how the thing was tied. The next, i was questioning about what, how, where and whatever question i can ask Shimon... Its supposed to be like a tool for praying for Catholics. How cool right?! I know i'm a Lutheran... But how cool is that! I decided to ask for one too... And yay! I got it.... He gave me a brochure on how to use the rosary... I'm supposed to pray with the rosary different prayers on each day of the week. Hmmm... Since i dun have a habit of praying everyday, maybe my fascination in this rosary will help me get started!
I am in quite a good mood today. =D I mean i am normally very tired and emo by this time of the day.. But i'm not.. Hahaha... Hmmm... What shall i talk about?
Actually... I got pretty worried.. Matthew Linus announced the people who were in the Good range and Average range for the CA... I was in neither. Gosh... This is like the worst news ever cos HR2002 is a core module! Hmmm.. I really hope i can finish reading all the readings though... I want at least a B+.... I want an A! Maybe i should start praying for it huh...
On work... Its really never-ending... Shimon and me are having no breaks le. Work just comes from all directions. For today, we have 4 jobs from 4 different people! I mean... How worse can this get? And everything is of priority... >.< Oh well... Seriously, if they just rush us like that with so many words, i will just give them the rushed results. They asked for it.
I have been thinking. If i do not want to be a materials engineer, what can i do? I mean its all ideal that i get a MBA after my grad and then do business related stuff, but is it going to work out? I know Shimon definitely wants to be a chef. Me? Am i going to settle with a materials engineer job and try to get started with my life? That's really a bad plan to have no plan. But what do i want to do?
A policeman? A doctor? A pilot? Seriously.... These are the only 3 ambitions that i have thought of. Being a police officer sounds like enlisting myself into the army again.... I'm not that bright enough to be a doctor... I have fear of heights... But its so damn cool to be a pilot! For now, only being a pilot seems possible for me. How how.... What is Your master plan for me?
There's so many things i want to learn too! Argh... There's just so many things! I want to learn drums. I want to learn Sax... I want to fully learn how to play a guitar. I have completed none!
The only thing that i am proud of myself now is that i am learning sign language. Its so frustrating cause i can't find someone to take it with me. And i have started! Having a companion is so important cause you can then practise with him or her! Haiz... Honestly, i feel weird to take it with "Angel"... But... Sharks... Anyway... BS1 is starting tml. I've been looking forward to this class.. But somehow the feeling is mixed now since i really feel a bit uncomfortable with .... Heng Shimon and Janis will be around when we go to SADeaf. Call me a skeptic.. I am really not used to a person treating me this good. Unless you are my gf or bff or friend that i know for a while... Please... I'm not trying to be bad but it really gives me goosebumps.
Everyone in church has started to call me Ken! Of course, besides the church administrator, Louelle you are still the first person to call me Ken. Haha... Think i am starting to respond to this name. Haha... Who else... Hmm... Abigail? haha... If you are reading this... And Verena.... Maybe i should explain a bit on why the name, Ken? My pet name was Kenken... My aunts and uncles calls me by that pet name since i was young and can even start remembering anything. So ya... Cut it short.. KEN! Seems like my BB officers got a shock too! Haha.. They din't know that i added Ken into my name... Haha.. Guess i gave everyone a surprise! =D
I am thankful. I want to give thanks to the Lord... For He really did his work for me. The BB officers who He planted around me. The BB company in which i really loved. The officers who watched me grow up... The seniors who groomed me... Haa... The Captain who i was so very scared off.. I felt so proud really! When Mr Ong said that he's really happy to see me and Andrew get baptised. I can sincerely feel his joy you know... He's really a person i respect a lot. I am so happy just from the fact that he's happy for me! I was his lamb and he was a shepherd maybe. =D I know that they really want me to go back to help out in BB. But i've gotta take a step at a time.. And i am very tired from my schedule now... I need my sit back and stare into space time.... Its my rest time... I need my cartoon time too. I promise i will try to... I promise..
I would like to give thanks for my buddies too! My BB buddies for 10 years. Tim, Jack and Kit.. I won't have survived in BB if it weren't for them. Lets just say that my life won't be so enriching and enjoyable in sec school if i didn't know them. Whatever... There's really nothing i can say to describe our friendship. =D
Louelle! I guess you made me grow the most in His Words with your constant passage quotes. =D AND also... You motherload of songs! Gosh... =D Seeing you so in love with God... Makes me jealous... Hahaha... I want to be like that too!
Hmmm.... Oh ya... Church camp comms.. I guess i really grew the most in faith and sense of belonging when i am serving in the church camp! Weiyong ar... ABIGAIL!!!! Daniel Yeo.... There's many people.... GUOQUAN... Don't say i keep niaoing you.. Haha... Haiya! I really think we should have church camp every year. My faith is really reaffirmed every year cause of that. =D
Edwin John Ferroa! You are da man who taught me about faith when i have none! With you Catholic teachings, i asked and you answered. You told me a lot to your understanding and maybe the Holy Spirit used you as a vessel that i may understand and build my own faith. I really give Him thanks that i have got you in army... Where my faith started growing.
Lastly.... You who enforced me to read the bible... You were tough on me and i was indeed quite lazy... Thanks to you i finished a gospel at least... Hmmm... Well...
Hmmm... Hahaa. I guess this is for today! I have typed quite a lot. =D
Wee! A rosary.... I am fascinated.. Really...
Sunday, April 04, 2010
Jesus is risen! and all of God's people say! AMEN!
Jesus defeated the power of death today and is seated at the right hand of the Father...
and everybody says!!!! AMEN!
Hello readers! =D
This is not the usual emo entry that i will type at night... Not the usual things that i have thought of for the day... This is the entry for MY BAPTISM! In short... Friends! Today will be my birthday too! =D On a Easter sunday somemore! Woah its totally AWESOMELY COOL!
This was pasted in the bible which i recieved as a gift from the church! Presented by the church council members. It really says it all doesn't it! Sie Kheng Soon Ken! My Holy Baptism on 4th of April 2010 on Easter! I was so nervous.... But i somehow knew this is the right thing to do... As Rev Lee baptised me, i can only tell myself... What a journey i have come through... What can i say actually... God actually prepared a way for me to way... And with his everlasting grace, He leads me till the person i have become today. I am a Child of God now.
Many times i have strayed from the way. But He remains to be a light beacon in my life, and ensures that i, can always go back to Him if i believe.... Many people will ask me... Why do you want to be baptised? I have no answer for them actually. Its all because of my faith journey with the Lord.
How can people understand? What has the Lord done for me? I can tell you boldly.. Its not in anyway tangible. Its not even something that i can see... I do not have the gift to see angels... I do not have to gift to speak in tongues... But i know i have a great gift from him... Faith...
I am who i am today cos i believe He answers my prayers in his due time! I admit i haven been a faithful person who prays... But i am still trying.. I am still learning... And everytime i tear, i would pray hard... That the Lord would help me... That He might even carry me through my difficult times.. I am telling everyone here... This is my testimony. Leave you problems to the Lord.. And He WILL DEFINITELY COME! It is never always what you ask for that will be done, it is His WILL that will be done! Thats why when i pray all the time, i pray hard to ask for something, but i will tell my Lord... Not my will but your will be done... Cos i know... That you have a masterplan for me... For everybody who believes in you!
Skeptics can rebuke me that its just luck or my own doing that i can go through difficult times.. That i am the one who made things happen... This is usually what i get from others... Even my best friends in NUS... They do render me speechless ALL the time...
BUT
Nothing is going to shake me! I told myself that! He is my solid rock which i can depend on! His works on me is what gives me Faith... That The Lord my God is always with me. I can tell you my friends... I have prayed many times when i am really really exhausted and afraid. And each time, my prayers were answered in His most AWESOME way. Might not to be my liking at first, BUT it benefitted me more!
My friends, who aren't convinced yet... Open your hearts a lttle more... Just a bit more... Try to experience.. After all, how can He love you, when you are constantly rejecting Him? He has known us since the world began.... He had already prepared a path for you... He will take you all!
I have some many things on my mind! That i wanna write down here... How can a God send His only son to die for us? To absolve us of our sins? He is the only one! He was tortured... He was punished under the Pontius Pilate! He was betrayed by His own disciple.... He never committed any sin... All He wants, is for us to believe in God Almighty, so that we may enter the Kingdom of God with Him.. He teaches to love thy neighbour, and pray for your enemies! Who can do it except Him? This Christ that i believed in.... He is Good.
It pains me everytime i watch the movie Passion of Christ. The way he was treated... The way our Christ is whipped.
So why do i want to be baptised?
Jesus was baptised. Why not me? He commanded baptism... And the spread of His good news to all! That i will obey! And the first step? Baptism.
Firstly... Ain't this cert cool?! I bet its cooler than all my other certs! I am a Lutheran now! By his grace, with my faith, will i be saved! AMEN!
Dear friends i am so glad today... Though my entry got a bit emo in the middle... But ya... What i said is true... What you see everyday, a cheerful ks... Its all thanks to Him that i can be cheerful and not emo. And if you ask me... I will tell you...
Have faith... Just a little will do...
Believe and open your heart to Him.. So He can work his miracles...
Dun deny him when you dun get your way... He has far more greater plans for you.
Lastly... I can only say... Trust Him.. What can you lose?
Look at me! I din turn out that bad! =D
Dear God i am excited.... Nervous..... Glad.... Scared...
This concoction of feeling is really contradicting.... This is even worst than needing to give a presentation. Hahaha...
I have always wonder how it is like to be in his kingdom... It seemed to be like a far far away dream that i can only materialise when i am asleep...
This year.... The year 2010... I made many decisions as compared to previous years where i will think alot and procrastinate. I am doing IA. I am learning sign language... And...
I AM GETTING BAPTISED TODAY.... On an Easter... Not only do i celebrate the defeat of the power of death, i am gonna celebrate my rebirth every Easter.
But what is this feeling inside.... I am absolutely glad yet i am frightened. Maybe its the question of whether i am good enough that is bothering me.
Nevertheless... As Martin Luther suggests...
By his grace, by my faith.... I'm sure my Lord will carry me when i am too tired to walk on.
This concoction of feeling is really contradicting.... This is even worst than needing to give a presentation. Hahaha...
I have always wonder how it is like to be in his kingdom... It seemed to be like a far far away dream that i can only materialise when i am asleep...
This year.... The year 2010... I made many decisions as compared to previous years where i will think alot and procrastinate. I am doing IA. I am learning sign language... And...
I AM GETTING BAPTISED TODAY.... On an Easter... Not only do i celebrate the defeat of the power of death, i am gonna celebrate my rebirth every Easter.
But what is this feeling inside.... I am absolutely glad yet i am frightened. Maybe its the question of whether i am good enough that is bothering me.
Nevertheless... As Martin Luther suggests...
By his grace, by my faith.... I'm sure my Lord will carry me when i am too tired to walk on.
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