update

So its been a while since i have written so i will update again. Life has been going great, i have decided to leave real estate to those that are good at it though and focus back on a normal job so hoping that works out. hoping i get this job with wells fargo as a personal banker but we'll see. im never great at this whole interview process!

As for the rest of life well things are moving haha. Got to see what rings she likes so thats definitely a positive move in our relationship haha and i spend pretty much every moment with her i can. Definitely love her as much as i ever thought possible and more so i think things are good haha. Giulia if this ends up in marriage btw you are most certainly invited out this way. haha.

Anyways the rest. well its life haha. c'est le vie! but seriously i can't complain about much! just need a stead decent paying job to pull up and then im set haha. just got accepted into my major too haha. communications with a pr slant! that will be intense since its a total 180 from what i was doing but it works!

what else.... uhm... haha im just working away i guess. trying to figure out if i want to rebuild ed the explorer or sell him and buy a truck (pending job of course), and trying to get back to military physical fitness standard. haha thats kinda intense.

anyways. ciao!

Just thought i would update this since its been a while. things are going great in life, well for the most part. been working at starting a career with real estate although its very slow and frustrating hopefully it will pay off eventually.

also im still dating the most amazing, fantastic, and wonderful women ever. i am so ecstatic every time i get to see and be with her and its quite simply amazing. coming up on 5 months and its still just the best thing ever. going to zions to meet her dads extended family and go hike and explore soon so that will be great fun. and can't wait

oh and the family reunion is in like a week so that will be good to to see some of my own family to bad though that not all of you can make it. miss ya dan and giulia but we will have to plan a time to visit or something soon.

anyways au revoir for now.

The new the good and the great

ok so long time no post. haha sorry giulia i suck. but.... lifes been great since the last post haha. i met the most amazing and beautiful girl and been with her basically daily for the past 3 months. its been amazing. even with the crazy stuff life throws at us. Kind of pretty excited though where things are and where they are headed. only time will tell i guess but shes definitley become my best friend and the best girlfriend i could ever ask for for sure.

other then that what else has been going on... oh so i finish my real estate course this week and start my new job and career in that next. wish me luck but it will be amazing to leave the bank behind for good. making such small amounts of money and having no job satisfaction was not worth the headache of the last few years. good riddance job. and i start college in the fall again. how crazy is that? havent been able to afford it the last few years but its going to be so good to finnaly finish up my degree in whatever it ends up being. im split between music theory major or something legit and boring like computers. gosh i hate computers but if it supports us then whatever its worth it right? heh. minoring again in language but my dumb school doesnt offer italian so its back to french. how i would love to learn the language my great grandparents used though. make me feel closer to my heritage ya know?

oh and i am apparently gluten intolerant or something like that. i had no idea what the heck that was til it was suggested i get tested for it to solve my headaches and stomach pains and guess what. i can't digest the crap. boo that takes out so much food. thankfully my girlfriend has been great at finding recipes we will have to try but shoot thats redic.

oh and i have made it a point to never again not be worthy and able to be a spiritual and priesthood person.  yeah that came out weird but whatever been going back to church since febuary to get my endowments and elder but nothing like not being able to participate in a blessing for your girlfriend because your not a elder. was like a kick in the face of why was i so dumb. but ill never ever let that happen again thats for sure.

uhm music wise im still absolutely in love with it. oh my gosh. for those that like calmer music out ther check out the climbing. great band from rexburg idaho (well ok they are based out of there but not from there) for anything harder i have been really into dead by april and chassing thrills. both amazing talents. if you have any suggestions for me though im all ears. i definitly need some more legit classic accoustic rock. giulia if you read this hook me up with some italian artists i hear they have some great compositions. haha

anyways ciao for now mes amies.

oh and giulia i dunno how to reply to you but i use gmail. [email protected]

Ok so job searching sucks. I am still with my current one at least but finding that candid job i can jump into in orem, provo, or near rexburg is sure not working out. once i have it i can move and its quite frustrating haha. but i am sure it'll be worth the annoyance.

lets see whats new. Ok so i have rounded out my guitar collection for the next bit with a greg bennett avion av6. its not gibson les paul standard double cutaway but it still competes and is far better then any epiphone. i love it. that said i have realized electric guitar is a whole new world. much practice and sucking is in order before i can say im even moderately ok.

what else in life. i have no clue. yup my lifes dull. oh wait. i am craving, wanting, desiring a schecter stilletto custom 5. well thats not exactly true. i love the look of the stilletto custom but i dont want a bolt on neck. does that make sense? so craving that guitar but with a set neck. that would be sweet. to bad its 2000.... redic.

bleh.

haha k bye

So this last weekend i had an amazing time up with my cousins and friends in rexburg and came to many realizations. The first and i think over riding one right now is this... Ogden sucks! i mean really...

the others ones i guess are far more reaching in my life. I have decided my biggest issues right now might stem simply from the fact that i need to move out and into a far more social place. being in rexburg that may mean that i need to move into school out there or maybe its provo or logan or whereever but i need to move. i dont even really care where so long as theres a cosmo school and a business school near by so i can finish up.

The second is that i would do anything for this girl but at the same time i think the biggest thing i could do for her is to just be friends as i dont think its recirpical and thats just lame but what else are you supposed to do? even if things were to work, at least in the present, shes 3 hours away with no intention of bridging the gap even if im willing to do most of the bridging. so i guess just whatever.

as far as my musics coming its fun. i mean i love my bass and its a blast its just hard sometimes to remember my playing pace and my notes are slower then that of my guitar. its just hard to get the beats going right but its progressing. it should be good. i got downfall of us all down pretty good in a few nights. i mean i need a lot more memorization but its good. i kinda want more guitars though. classical accoustic and a electric are musts now.

i guess that sums up this week. stay tuned i guess.

So i am totally stumped on a bass line. im loving the heavy 5 note lead up, and loving the main chorus line but i cant figure out how to pull the right backing for the guitars solo its a pain. im not sure if i should lead into the solo with, just back off and play just the quarter notes before he leads into each small part of the solo or to just stay silent. its perplexing. and even at that point his notes are so high on the scale its hard to match my 4string to it.

also with my bass life, if anyone knows of a perfect distortion pedal for the bass that doesn't lose its low end punch lemme know. i love the clean sound of the bass for certain parts but it just stands out against a band full of hard, high gain, distorted guitars. and im trying to add punch to their sound not stand out as the clean sounding bass. ya know? bleh. but the good news is i found the stack i want its just a grand.... kill me.

oh and my perplexing situation isn't any clearer then it was last weekend. nothing happened but im still stuck. i think i might go visit my cousin and the girl from my past but at the same time im still lost in if its the right choice. i mean really you have to just make a choice and go with the consequences i guess so whatev here i go.

last.... what the hecks with shepherds pie? its the nastiest thing in the world. and im not scottish or irish or whatever that dish came from. english, welsh, and italian does not a whatever make. and whats with lets just throw left over veggies, nasty plain ground beef, and potatoes together. stupid. make something better out of the materials but thats just plain, boring mush. yuck

its kinda funny how the heart works. one smile, one hint of a spark and it goes on this temporary spit of insanity hoping for the world but underneath it all theres that terror that it will work and the dread that it won't. And if that spit of insanity lasts long enough you pull yourself together and ask her out and throw all your hopes into that one initial night. and that whole night you sit there, barely breathing, but in that inner turmoil you pray for each subtle clue that the nights gone well. that you were able to be great enough in that few hours to get a chance at something more then that one agonizing night.

I say this because this turmoil of each new date, each new risk we take at times gets confounded by even more difficult, and far more heart stopping decisions. what do you do when you have the most beautiful and sincere person nearby, the one stranger that, for the first time in a while, you feel could possible understand you. the one person that looks you in the eye, for unknown reasons, feels that connection and accepts whatever she sees as it is. Easy choice right? Take the risk, go for the girl but i would be throwing someone else away. See at the same time, one of the most caring, loving, and honest people you know comes back in your life. But see she likes you as you are, but truly likes the better person she sees inside of you. Now im not saying that better person exists mind you, for that person is far different then i.

This whole choice comes down to two. Do you go for the one that you have felt drawn to since the moment you saw her. That, if it went anywhere, would want nothing more or less then the person you are. Who's beautiful smile can bring a smile to your face in a instant. Or do you go for the one that fell through your fingers. The amazing girl from your past that always saw you for who you were in your greatest moments of selfishness. but at the sametime may never be able to accept that the person i am now is enough because she expects more.

Now i say this is a choice that hangs because in this situation, for the first time, i can't bring myself to be dishonest or half hearted in my pursuit of either. Neither can i afford the time to date both as one would be a full time commitment as long distance is neither easy nor something to play games with. Although the promise that she will eventually go home, back to one of the few places on earth you would follow because its location is also your home is there and very tempting. while the other, should it go well, would most certainly be a commitment because, in my usual fashion, i am not one for polygamous affairs even if its just dating.

also an update to my melancholy. its still very much active, mostly due to college i think. its hard to have that positive view for whats to come when the shear cost of even another semester with all your bills just looks intensely out of reach. Its like climbing a mountain where the first part, deciding to go and planning your ascent, were easy. but then looking at the fine details you notice that theres a shear cliff face you have to scale before you ever get close to that first little foothold. what future is there in this world we live for a kid that's hopelessly passionate about music, working at a credit union and pinching pennies for even new guitar strings.

that said i guess in hindsight i brought it on myself. i probably should have accepted that i will always suffer from add. and not the happy, hyper kind where all your problems revolve around sitting still. nope im incredibly fortunate to have the one that doesn't present till just before adulthood and fully metastasizes at adult hood. inattentive add that comes full on with the near impossibility of focusing on anyone one task for very long without extreme douses of medicine. yup great right? manageable at least if your not like me and shun medicine. and in doing so kinda messed up my grades that i need at least one good semester before i qualify for aid. awesome right? so the penny pinching continues for that hope or glimmer of something better.

to brighten the general view though i have decided that i am absolutely in love with my bass. it will eventually need new pickups that are a bit hotter, and it will most def need a few new pedals to both allow me to amplify the bass at key points and distort the noise when needed to more fully blend with the rhythmic guitar. but again money pinching is key i guess. But if your ever looking for a bass with a warm and yet slightly metal tone. give the schecter omen extreme 4 a test run. and just so ya'll know. unless your just looking for that punchy and slightly bland tone i fully recomend mahogany wood body with active pickups for whatever bass ya get. basswood even with active pickups just cant even begin to compete with the warmth and vibrancy the wood creates. that said im kinda curious how rosewood or ashwood would be? anyone know? well i guess one day i may be able to find out. i mean if mahogany is such a deal breaker what would those do for the tones and harmonics? oh and its kinda nice. i haven't picked up my guitar for more then picking around a few songs in ages. but ever since i grabbed the bass its like i can't put down my guitars. whether its the bass, the accoustic, my buddies les paul it doesn't matter.

that said its gotten me thinking. i have so many more instruments to go and thats just in the guitar world. i would love a great 6 string electric. maybe a schecter omen extreme like my bass for metal or a double cutaway. either way. and i def want a acoustic bass, classic guitar, and a fully body acoustic as compared to my half body acoustic. sad i barely can play and yet im still oh so in love.

oh and i think at least on the side im going to get my music blog going. now before getting all excited its just my thoughts on albums and music i have picked up. maybe ill try and update it weekly with my top 10 new picks for the week or something. so if ya have something ya want me to listen to and get back to ya on or just curious what i've heard lately check it out i guess.

le vie du musique is the name of my blog. i think? anyways for this far more personal blog i guess for the moment im done. the christmas musics finally dissipated enough maybe i can practice some more music. all but finished learning the basics to all i want. to bad it requires two guitars i have had to try and blend the important dynamics from both guitar into just the one solitary guitar i have but its nowhere near as good. now on to something easier perhaps but amazing nonetheless alkaline trios turn for me to learn a song.