My kids are the sweetest ever. I am going to share some of the cute things they have been saying.
Last week Colby was in his room playing with his trains and I needed to shopping for some of the things we picked off our ward angel tree. When I told him we were headed to the store and it was time to clean up he was mad. He hates going to the store, not sure why because when we go he is a good boy but he is our little home body. He just likes to be home. He asked if he could go to the neighbors while I went. Normally that would have been fine, but I wanted the kids to help pick things out, and it was a teaching opportunity for me. I sat him down and told him why we were shopping for these kids, I wanted his help to pick out the perfect gifts and it was a great little talk. I went downstairs to do Molly's hair and asked him to get his shoes on. A few minutes later he came downstairs with his piggy. I asked him what he was doing with it and he said, "here mom you can have some of my monies." I said, "what for buddy." "So you can give it to the kids that don't have monies." What a sweet guy!

A few days ago I asked him to go get dressed. He went up stairs and brought me a shirt and pair of pants. With a sad pouty face he handed me his shirt and said, I can't wear this shirt anymore mom you can keep it." I took it from him and unfolded it. It was his shirt that said BIG BROTHER on it. The shirt that he usually wanted to wear every single day. My heart broke when he told me he couldn't wear it anymore because his baby was dead and he is not a big brother. It was also a great teaching opportunity for me. I was able to talk to him again about Families and the Plan of Salvation. That he will always be the big brother to our sweet Hunter.

Me neighbor, who's name is Megan and who had a baby boy the same day I delivered our baby, came to give us their Christmas card. My kids tore it open and were looking at the picture. She has 2 other kids that my kids play with all the time but I don't think they realized they had a baby. Molly asked if that was our baby. I told her it was not. I told her Kai and Ellie have a new baby brother. Colby got really mad then said, " that's not fair, I can't wait till we can have a baby that is not dead." Some days I just don't know what to say to me kids. Their little hearts are as broken as mine. A lot of times I can teach them things but some times I feel the same way as Colby. It doesn't seem fair. We are surrounded by pregnant people and families with new babies. (I am not angry at them, I am truly happy for them.) It just makes it harder. I see them and it feels like someone poured salt in my gaping wound. Every time I see someone that is pregnant my heart sinks and I can't help but cry. I know with time this will get easier.

Molly has also been so sweet when it comes to this topic. She always wants to talk about the baby. She is worried about him being cold in the ground and how she wishes he could come home to our warm comfy house. She always talks about how she thinks our baby would have loved to play cars, and trains with us. She gave her first talk in Primary this week and it was on The Son of God. After we came home from church she told us how happy Heavenly Father must be to have his baby back. She is right I can only imagine how happy our Father in Heaven is when his children return home to Him.

With Christmas being just around the corner, and being on the go almost every day, I am grateful for these opportunities that slow us down. To help us teach our children why we are here and why we go through trials, but that Christ suffered for all of us. I have never felt the Saviors love for me more than I have this past month. I am grateful for this time of year to focus our thoughts on Christ. Merry Christmas to all of you.

Help...

I want to get back into this whole blogging thing but I have forgotten what to do. It all looks new to me and I have been trying to get a cute background on here again for way to long. So for the next little bit we may be under construction but check back! My goal is to update every week to help me in my journey of healing after the loss of our sweet baby Hunter. This will be my place to share our experience and keep record for myself, but also to keep you up to date with what is going on in our everyday life! Aren't you all just so lucky, you know we do live an exciting life!