Most of you out here on the civilized Right will be familiar with the author, columnist, and podcaster John Derbyshire, a British expat who celebrated his 80th birthday last week, and with whom I am happy to say I have had a slight personal acquaintance for many years (from a small monthly dinner club we used to attend together in New York, the occasional function hosted by VDare, and the annual meetings of Paul Gottfried’s now-defunct Mencken Club).
This weekend I listened, as I have done since its inception, to John’s Friday-evening Radio Derb podcast, in which our unfailingly genial host offered his insight and analysis on the news of the week, as well as a “closing miscellany of brief items” and an endlessly varying selection of sign-off music. Listening to it each week has been one of my most dependable little pleasures (that dependability secured by John’s assurance, at the close of every podcast, that “there will be more from Radio Derb next week”).
This weekend, though, instead of the usual closing miscellany, John closed with this:
That’s all the news I’m going to cover this week, ladies and gents. I shall now proceed straight to signoff, and this week’s signoff is somewhat out of the ordinary.
I have already mentioned — and please forgive me mentioning it again — that Tuesday this week, June 3rd, was my 80th birthday. As it happens, that wasn’t the only memorable milestone for me this week. Today’s Radio Derb — the one you are listening to or reading — is Number One Thousand. It’s my one thousandth podcast since the show began in May 2004. I think Radio Derb may be the oldest continuous dissident-right podcast on the internet.
I can hear arithmetically-inclined listeners muttering: “Wait a minute, Derb. May 2004? That was 21 years ago, plus a few days. There go 52 weeks to the year; this is a weekly podcast; and 21 times 52 is 1,092. How can this be only issue number one thousand? Where did the other 92 go?”
Answer: We took a while to settle down into a regular weekly podcast; and even when we had, I sometimes missed a week. In all those years there were only two years with 52 podcasts, four years with 51, and six with 50. All the rest had fewer than 50.
The total, first to last, is one thousand — trust me. Or if you don’t trust me, go to my personal website johnderbyshire.com, select “Opinions” from the navigation box, then “Radio Derb.” They’re all listed there, with transcripts. You can count ’em for yourself.
The audio is there, too, so you can listen to them all if you want to. It’s only fair to warn you, though, that while I don’t yet know precise minutes and seconds on today’s podcast, the previous 999 add up to 38,541 minutes and 41 seconds; or, if you prefer, 642 hours, 21 minutes, and 41 seconds. If you were to listen for 8 hours per day, that would keep you busy for 80 days, 2 hours, 21 minutes, and 41 seconds.
So: 80th birthday, podcast number one thousand. You’d think that two milestones in one week would be enough of a coincidence, but there’s a wee bit even more.
If you were following me back in 2007 you’ll recall from my monthly Diary in April that year that I have a harmless eccentricity: I count my days, from the day of my birth as day number one. Well, Tuesday this week — my 80th birthday — was day number 29,221; and that, ladies and gentlemen, is [drum roll] a prime number !
That’s not a sensational coincidence, but it’s against the odds. As numbers get bigger and bigger, the primes thin out. In the neighborhood of a decently big number N the frequency of primes is roughly one in log(N), where that’s the natural logarithm of course. The natural logarithm of one million is approximately 13.8, so in the neighborhood of one million, only slightly more than one number in fourteen is a prime number.
The natural logarithm of 29,221, my birthday day number last Tuesday, is 10.28264 and change; so in that neighborhood, slightly fewer than one number in ten is prime. Sure enough, 29,221 is preceded by eleven non-primes and followed by nine more.
The day number of my birthday being prime isn’t a miracle; but, as I said, it’s against the odds.
So: podcast number one thousand this week, birthday number eighty this week, day number of the latter a prime against the odds. Pondering these coincidences, I have concluded that the universe is trying to tell me something. What it’s trying to tell me is, it’s time to hang up my mike and my keyboard.
To be perfectly open about it, the numerical coincidences only served as prompts. I’ve been feeling for a while that I spend way too much time at my computer when there are other things I should be attending to. I have a hundred-year-old house I need to keep from falling down. I have a nearly forty-year-old marriage that needs time and attention, as all marriages do. I have a son and a daughter nearby to worry about, and a three-year-old grandson to fuss over, and a dog to walk.
There are friendships to keep up, church responsibilities to fulfil, books to read, jigsaw puzzles and crossword puzzles to do, shooting skills and my cribbage game to keep honed. I’m blessed with good health; but inevitably, entering my eighties, I tire more easily than I used to, and get less accomplished per hour of waking life.
So this edition of Radio Derb is the last.
I won’t be giving up opinionating altogether. I’m a chronic writer by nature, cacoëthes scribendi. I shall keep up my monthly column in Chronicles magazine for as long as they want me to, and I’ll do occasional book reviews for them and for any other of the dwindling number of outlets that still publish book reviews for the dwindling number of people who still read books. I may try to take full advantage of social media, which up to now I never have … although, as I said, I’m aiming to spend a lot less time at the computer.
This valediction, like the famous poetic one, forbids mourning. In these 21 years of podcasting I’ve engaged with a mighty host of listeners and readers. I’ve learned a lot from them that’s improved my understanding, and I flatter myself that they may have learned something from me. Like that poet and his sweetheart — I think it was actually his wife — whose love keeps them spiritually united even when physically far apart, those mutual improvements in understanding will keep me and my followers bonded together at some level above the everyday transactional.
My heartfelt thanks to all those who’ve engaged with me by following Radio Derb, the thanks doubled to those who’ve emailed in with wit and/or wisdom, tripled to followers who’ve blessed me with donations and gifts. And I must add my gratitude once again to the surprising number of listeners and readers who have emailed in since Tuesday to wish me a happy birthday. It was a happy birthday, made even happier by your kind thoughts. God bless you all!
There will be no more from Radio Derb next week, nor in any following week.
Thank you, John, for your wisdom, your grace, your humor, your civility, and for standing, all these years, upon the burning deck. Thank you also for your endless curiosity, which as Dr. Johnson said, “is, in great and generous minds, the first passion and the last.” I, and all your devoted listeners, will miss you poignantly every Saturday for the foreseeable future, and likely beyond.
May the good Lord bless you with a long and happy retirement filled with family, good friends, and all the rich harvest of a life well lived.
(What’s this? I think I must have something in my eye…)