To Beau Elias, on your 5th birthday

Dear Beau,

Happy 5th birthday my buddy! I tell you, as our oldest child, I see that time just continues to fly in rearing children. It seems each year goes by faster and faster with you and this year was no exception. There are several things I want to note about this past year with you and my prayers for the coming year.

Some little things of note but things I like to look back on anyway are that your favorite colors are blue and green. If you can find a way to make whatever you're doing, creating, wearing etc., blue and green it's a winner. You've even wanted your birthday party to be themed just blue and green; let me tell you as a mom how thankful I am for that request because, as you might see through your own wife if you marry and have children, this was an easy request to grant! You like running and climbing on EVERYTHING, so much so that you often have to reminded or reprimanded for jumping/climbing on things you know you're not supposed to be on. You have so much energy! I wish I had more than a fraction to keep up, but I am amazed at how you're always on the go with seemingly endless amounts of energy. You like to act out scenes from shows you may have watched (you currently enjoy Ben10 and all the characters from that) or even just creating your own plots.

One of your best playmates in all of this is your sister, Cora. You two are becoming closer playmates more and more each day and I look on with such joy in the moments you two are depending on one another to create fun. With Cora, you are a sweet big brother, although while no other children can fuss at Cora, you definitely give her a time sometimes. I keep praying you'll begin or take note of the beauty in sibling relationships and realize just how much Cora does and will continue to look to you for safety, assurance, and counsel. Being the oldest sibling in my own family growing up, I now see what an important role I played and see how I sometimes succeeded immensely and sadly other times failed miserably. I see a strong, leadership quality in you and not only that, but a protective nature. Continue to nurture these God-given qualities Beau; you're a fantastic big brother when you allow yourself to be. :)

You also became a big brother for the second time, to your sister Sylvie Kate born just a few months ago. Daddy and I didn't find out if she was going to be a boy or girl and so when we brought you in after she was born to tell you that she was, indeed, a girl, you replied, "Well, I was really hoping it was a boy." I know how much you wanted a brother but I want to tell you how much your help around the house, help with both of your sisters, and your swift response to my need for your aide has meant. Again, I can see what an amazing father you might make someday. You cuddle Sylvie Kate, kiss on her, and are so willing to give her "huggins and lovins;" I just know she's going to attach to you as she gets older. Again though Beau, realize that is a blessing and an opportunity to show Christ's love to her.

You've finished preschool and we're moving on to kindergarten. Daddy and I prayed and talked for several years and came to a conclusion that we are going to homeschool you next year. I'm nervous and excited for this new adventure we'll be on; you're such a quick learner and so smart (you blow us away with your intellect all the time!), that I'm curious to see how this next year goes.

You are so proficient in the word. I see time and time again confirmation that the Lord has given you a gift in understanding and being able to recall scripture. We get comments all the time from Bible class teachers how you are very outspoken in class and are always adding to the discussion. I continue to pray for this to grow in you, but also that you see scripture as not just stories and words to read, but testimonies and a promise fulfilled; these words are active and moving and they are a beautiful display of God showing us that He is who He says He is and that He does what He promises to do. Let that realization flow over you buddy and paired with your knowledge, there is no telling the reach you could have for His kingdom.

My one big concern in all of this though, something that can often be your biggest asset but other times be your biggest downfall, is your emotional nature. You feel everything. If someone hurts, you feel it, if someone is joyous, you feel it. This can be a beautiful attribute in ministering to others but I notice how often your biggest emotion comes through your anger. You can get so angry so quickly and it often becomes destructive, whether through you throwing something, saying something, or hurting someone. Beau, when you start feeling a welling up, please remember you have a choice, that the Lord has given us a spirit of power, and that you can choose to let this anger rule you OR you can choose to overpower it. I want you to know in saying this I don't expect perfection, nor does the Lord, but He (and I) do expect you to desire to overcome your anger and walk in expectation that you will. Trust in God's promises and see that He can and will come to your aide when you feel you can't do this on your own.

Beau bear, you are such a blessing to me. I love the discussions we're beginning to have, watching you continue to become a "kid" and away from a "toddler". You're passion inspires me, your giggles make me smile, your hugs melt me, and your prayers bring me to my knees. I love you so very much buddy, and know there isn't a day that goes by that I don't thank the Lord that He let me be your mom. Happy 5th birthday, my tough, fierce, bold boy.

Love,
Mom

To Cora Fair, on your 2nd birthday

Dear Cora,

You are turning two! What a fun year this has been to watch you grow. You are becoming quite a girl and this year has shown to be such a year of advancement for you. I've watched you start forming your personality and I cant wait to see what this next year holds in store for you. There are some things Id especially like to remember about you at this stage.

You are my creative child. You could spend your days just painting, coloring, and drawing. Anytime someone pulls out crayons, paints, paper, or even just a pencil, you're wanting to draw. You sing and dance all day long. Whether it's a hymn, a song from preschool, a song from the radio, or one you've simply come up with on your own, you're singing all the time. Your dad and I often smile when driving in the car because we can hear you singing while gazing out the window. You come up with your own dances and anytime you hear a good beat, you're swinging your hips. You especially are fond of your "Nakey Dance" where anytime you or anyone else in the house is getting ready or has taken a shower, you start singing and dancing saying, "Nakey So-and-so." I love that about you. I love that you can always find a reason to sing and always think there's something to be created. I hope you never stop thinking that.

You love to read. If I were to set a huge pile of books in front of you, you would spend your day asking someone to read to you then flipping through them yourself. Your my child that I can read to for hours, and you never tire of it. You adore Brown Bear, Where's Spot, Chicka Chicka Boom Boom, and so many others. You enjoy reading your Bible. We'll read through your daily story and you'll ask if we can read it again. Anytime you see a picture of a book on anything, you assume it's a Bible. I'll often find you in your room, flipping through pages, retelling stories as much as you can. It's such a sweet sight.

You are such a smart girl. This year you've learned your ABCs, can count to 13, know your colors and body parts, and have just learned the 12 sons of Jacob. You know everyone's name, including your own, but also love referring to yourself as "Coco." I never dreamed your nickname would be that, but it seems to fit your personality. :) You've also learned your first memory verse; "In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth. Genesis 1:1." I'm so amazed at how quickly you learn and your vocabulary is quite extensive. You are constantly coming up to me with a new phrase. Right now you'll come up and say, "Hey guys, whatcha doing?" You floor me with all you've learned this year; it makes me a little nervous to think how far along you'll be in another two years! But also so excited that you love to learn.

You are a girly girl. You love to run in your room in the mornings and decide what to wear. You like dresses and getting your hair fixed. You like shoes and make-up. Sometimes I catch you playing in my make-up and we have to make a quick trip to the sink to wash you. You'll find your brother's chapstick and will put it on your lips over and over again. You adore getting your nails painted. I've had to discipline you a couple times for getting into my nail polish after telling you to let it be. But you relish the times when you sit in my bathroom and we pull out all the different nail colors and you get to decide which to put on that time. I am so excited that you're so girly; it makes me very happy to think of all the girly things we can do together as you get older.

You're a prayerful gal. You know what it means to pray and you remind me to pray. You'll join in at prayer time whether it's at the dinner table or in your bed. You tell me that you love Jesus and girl, that makes my heart soar. It's a constant prayer of mine that you come to know and serve Him. My training with you is focused on turning to Him and going out and telling others about Him. Know that He created you, and that He created you for a purpose. This life is not your own and it's so fleeting; use the talents and qualities He's given you to further His kingdom. There will be times that I let you down as a mother and for that I'm apologizing for the past and in advance for the future. It breaks my heart to know I have and will do this but Cora, that's why it is SO important for you to know there's a God, the one true God, that will NEVER let you down. Turn to Him; He's waiting.

You are your daddy's girl. You squeal with delight when he comes through the door after work. You will barely let him out of your sight when he's home. You wake up in the middle of the night and come in our room simply (I think) so you can snuggle up to him. You get all dressed up and ask him to tell you how pretty you are (and he happily obliges). Remember though, "Pretty is as pretty does." I say this over and over to you to remind you that although indeed you are a beautiful little girl, that it won't matter much unless you're beautiful on the inside as well.

You became a big sister this year! Just a little over three months ago your sister Sylvie Kate joined our family. You have LOVED being a big sister to her and I can see your maternal instincts when you interact with her. You want so badly to hold her and I catch you interacting with your babies as if they were your sister. You run to tell her "Good Morning" when you wake up and I just know that in the coming years, you two are going to be the best of friends.

You and Beau are forming your relationship with each other. This brings the good, bad, and the ugly. There are times that you two play together and it's the sweetest sight, but there are also times that you two fight and attack one another and that's when I have to step in. In the end though, you look up to Beau in the best of ways, and copy so much of what he does and says. I know you're going to be so thankful for a big brother as you grow; I always wished I had had a big brother as a child.

You are a dramatic child. This can mean using different voices to make us laugh or it can mean you throwing yourself and sobbing over little things. While I enjoy the funny voices and ways you act out stories to me, the drama when you get told "no" is something I know we have to set straight now or will be a source of frustration as you get older. Remember there's a time and place for acting and making scenes; being told "no" is not one of them.

You are a jokester! You love telling jokes and making up silly things to say. You'll change your voice and tell me things just to make me laugh. I'm so glad you have a great sense of humor, that will be something to cling to when life gets hard.

Cora, I love you so very much and love being your mama. My prayer for you in the coming year is to continue learning of the Lord, continue absorbing the world around you, take in all the beauty God gave us, and then breathe it out by creating something beautiful. God loves seeing your attitude towards life; you wake up smiling.

Happy birthday precious girl, I love you.

Love,
Mama