Yesterday was a pretty memorable day for our family. Clayton got baptized!
This
day meant so much to all of us. Lisa and Andrew spent a long time wondering if Clayton
should/could get baptized. In the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day
Saints (aka the Mormons), children can be baptized when they reach the
age of accountability, which is eight years old. But baptism is not
necessary for individuals whose intellectual development prevents them
from understanding right and wrong. Church policy says:
Q: What are the guidelines as to whether or not a child with an intellectual disability may be baptized?
A: This is a matter between parents, the child, and
local priesthood leaders. If the child has a basic understanding of
gospel principles and wishes to be baptized, then baptism may be
possible.
As with most things with Clayton- school
placement, discipline, etc, we felt like he was on the borderline in
terms of understanding and readiness. It is so hard to categorize Clayton! He has some amazing intelligence and abilities, but also some
severe challenges and limitations. We didn't want him to get baptized
unless he could make the decision for himself.
Up until
the time he turned seven, Lisa and Andrew had been teaching and talking about
baptism as normal. But Lisa didn't want to continue planning on it and
talking it up to Clayton if it wasn't going to happen when he turned
eight. So several months ago they emailed their bishop and asked for his guidance about whether Clayton should
get baptized at age eight, or at a later age, or not at all. They were
completely fine with any of those possibilities.
Lisa was expecting to hear a short and sweet reply of "Sure, go ahead and
baptize him!" or "Nope, don't worry about it yet, wait a few years and
revisit the question." Which would have been completely fine. But their wonderful bishop wrote such a thoughtful response- he asked some
questions about Clayton, and spent the next week in Primary observing
and talking to Clayton. He also spent time praying about their situation. Lisa writes: "I
can't tell you how much his love and care meant to our family. He has
an extensive plateful being a bishop- and to have him spend so much time
and attention on our little guy was such a blessing. He later responded
that he felt we should proceed with preparations to baptize Clayton
when he turned eight. So we did. Even though Clayton still has his tough
times and I occasionally wondered if we should still move forward, we
continually felt like he was ready to make this choice. We did our best
this year to help him feel ready, and he did such a great job yesterday!"
Here he is with his Great-grandpa!
And with Papa and Mor Mor:
And with Grandma and Grandpa:
The Staffords all attended the baptism too!
Lisa writes: "We
had a WONDERFUL surprise at the baptism- we were in the foyer taking
these snapshots, and Brian's friend Hunter (in the orange tie below)
came walking down the hall!! The Shult's were in our ward in South
Dakota and we haven't seen them in two years. They surprised us and
drove up from Nevada for the baptism!! Seeing Melanie and this AWESOME
family was just the cherry on top of our wonderful day. I can't explain
how loved and happy I felt. Melanie is one of those friends you can say
anything to, and she gets it. She and I were together through a lot in
SD, and I love her. Everyone in the world should be so lucky to have a
friend like Melanie in their life."
Here
is our wonderful family! We finally got to meet James and Chelsea's son
Ezra, and he is even cuter than his pictures. It was so much fun to
spend time with all of us together.
My four wonderful children!
One last picture of Brian and Dory with Aunt Mary Anne's friend Mr. Bones. They thought he was pretty cool :-)
Clayton, you are definitely a choice young boy. We love you so much and we couldn't be prouder.
