WELCOME- Scroll down! A lot to see below!

Hi! I am Javier Marti, and this blog is a collection of interesting things, updated (almost!) daily, with a bias towards beauty, sexiness and ironic talk. You are most welcome to comment! There are more links than personal ramblings of mine, so you'll surely find something that you like.
Things you can do: scroll down to see last months entries, discover my life in the archives, see the videos...
You can also subscribe to the feed, add me to Del.icio.us (thanks!) so I become an egocentric internet superstar, and/or tell your mother to send me a nice cake. (I hate cooking...yeah, I know)

> Want to learn more about me? Read the stuff on the right hand side
> Contact me: niquel757 (at) gmail.com

"Can't We Talk?" (condensed from: You Just Don't Understand)

A married couple was in a car when the wife turned to her husband and asked, "Would you like to stop for a coffee?"

"No, thanks," he answered truthfully. So they didn't stop.

The result? The wife, who had indeed wanted to stop, became annoyed because she felt her preference had not been considered. The husband, seeing his wife was angry, became frustrated. Why didn't she just say what she wanted?

"Since women often think in terms of closeness and support, they struggle to preserve intimacy. Men, concerned with status, tend to focus more on independence. These traits can lead women and men to starkly different views of the same situation."

"I now see that my husband was simply approaching the world as many men do: as a place where people try to achieve and maintain status. I, on the other hand, was approaching the world as many women do: as a network of connections seeking support and consensus."

"many women are hurt when men don't talk to them at home, and many men are frustrated when they disappoint their partners without knowing why."

Rest of this interesting article here:
http://www.h2limousine.com/women-vs-men.php

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New icon

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Powerful photo: The Mourning

From here

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Evil bunny

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New videos added to Trendirama.tv

I went to a short films festival yesterday.
http://www.futureshorts.com/calendar-city-screenings.php
Some of the videos are now on Trendirama.tv. The most stricking was the one called "spider" (graphic images). Check out the "tales of mere existence" too, pretty funny...

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"so what?"

"Just because you say so?"

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So you want a free website from me?

Click on the image to read my answer

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It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly…who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who have never known neither victory nor defeat.

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Three must-read blogging articles

Plan Ahead to Bring Readers Back
Pattern Your Audience: How Editorial Calendars Can Increase Your Readership
Ten More Blogging Tips From A Novice Blogger

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Funny husband-wife quotes

When a man answers the phone he reaches for a pencil;
when a woman answers she reaches for a chair.

---

I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

---

If you want to make a woman nervous, just put her in a room
with a hundred hats and no mirror.

---

A woman likes a man best who has a will of his own
- made out in her name.

---

Women distrust men too much in general and not enough in particular.

---

Said a girl graduate, "Four years of college! And whom has it got me?"

Many more on this website

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All what you need to know about personal finance

Great article accompanied by little business card size drawings, in case you are not able can't read ;)

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We even danced polka! I am -ehm...- very good at it now!

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Happiness is where you found it, not where others tell you it is

Before I was a janitor, I was a professional in white collar jobs. Back then, I felt tremendous pressure to live up to a certain respectable image. I had to always look good, say the "right" things, have a picture-perfect resume, and have all of the "right" answers to interview questions. I recall spending hours poring over interview books, rehearsing my answers. I so desperately wanted to come across as ambitious, aggressive, and teamplayerish.
From this article

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Useless cat for sale

Not all cats are good at their job

Useless cat for sale

Not all cats are good at their job

Javier's destiny? :)

me: did you see my painting? did you like it? are you proud of me? will you ask me to marry you?!
her: I am proud of you. Really. You are a genius! But I am not brave enough to marry an artist.

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True Self - Anita de Bauch by Javier Marti

We all have a hidden side. We are one and too many...complex and simple... at the same time. We are wicked, we are kind...we are light and darkness...yet, which one, if any, is our true self?
We all are...because the answer is we are all and none at once...that's who we are.

My latest digital painting is a composition from photos of my new friend Anita de Bauch. Base photos can be found on her website, here


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No, it is not moving

Life satisfaction for women, decreasing

By most objective measures the lives of women in the United States have improved over the past 35 years, yet we show that measures of subjective well-being indicate that women’s happiness has declined both absolutely and relative to male happiness. The paradox of women’s declining relative well-being is found examining multiple countries, datasets, and measures of subjective well-being, and is pervasive across demographic groups. Relative declines in female happiness have eroded a gender gap in happiness in which women in the 1970s typically reported higher subjective well-being than did men. These declines have continued and a new gender gap is emerging—one with higher subjective well-being for men. Our findings raise provocative questions about the contribution of the women’s movement to women’s welfare and about the legitimacy of using subjective well-being to assess broad social changes.
From this report

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About narcissism

Once someone told me that I am narcissistic, but I cannot see myself identified in many of the traits mentioned in these paragraphs...
..........

“The characteristics and categories provide clues, but not a definitive diagnosis,” says Professor Eddie Kane, the director of the Personality Disorder Institute at Nottingham University. “While it’s clear when a person is psychotic or schizophrenic, we have to be wary in diagnosing personality disorder. Putting a label on someone’s behaviour that may have an enormous impact on their lives has to be very carefully considered.”

gives a list of nine characteristics, of which a person has to have at least five before NPD is considered.

The nine include a grandiose sense of self-importance; preoccupations with fantasies of success, power, brilliance, beauty or ideal love; a belief that he or she is “special”, only understood by other “special” people; a need for admiration; a sense of entitlement or unreasonable expectations of favourable treatment; exploitative, taking advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends; unwillingness to recognise or identify with the needs of others; envious of others, or thinks others are envious of him or her, and arrogance.

In its most extreme form, known as malignant narcissism, paranoia and physical aggression may also be displayed

In a paper published this May in The British Journal of Psychiatry, Professor Peter Tyrer and colleagues from the department of psychological medicine at Imperial College London wrote unequivocally: “The assessment of personality disorder is currently inaccurate, largely unreliable, frequently wrong and in need of improvement.”

narcissist’s tools of the trade – exaggeration, flattery, grandiosity and the display of fake vulnerability and self-pity to elicit sympathy

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Don´t ask...

Power is everything

The best salsa dancing from a guy I've ever seen

I saw this video somewhere and then it dissapeared. Now I've found it again! (the joy of having salsa teacher ex girlfriends)
The best dancing I've ever seen...this guy is too much!
The beautiful song is fom Rey Ruiz, it is called Luna negra, and the dancer is called Daniel Castillo
When I grow up I'll dance like this guy AS I sing like Rey Ruiz...and then I'll die right away since there will not be much else to do, really...

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"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler." Albert Einstein

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The first case of digital public guilty verdict?

A teenage girl killed herself after being bullied online. A newspaper wrote about it, but didn't mention the names of the presumed guilty -adult- individuals. Later, anonyomoys people tracked these individuals down and published their details online.
This case -that was overlooked by many of us- can and should have profound implications for our justice system. Only a few of the questions that quickly come to mind are:

1. What's the role of the courts when regular citizens take decisions that were previously relegated to the courts?
   
2. What's the value of police investigations if they cannot find the people guilty of crimes but a "common internet jury" can?
   
3. When should this public jury/investigation panel be called into action?
   
4. How can anybody stop it from springing into action by itself and publishing online private individual's details?
   
5. What if the information collected by this "public commitee" is wrong and the innocent are accused?
6. How and when would the publicly accused know that their information is being posted online, and wht they're being accused of?
7. When will the first death penalty be applied to a regular citizen by strangers on the streets and how could this be avoided?
   

And you thought crowdsourcing would never get to the justice and investigative professions...

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Girls getting extra help and guys being drugged up?

At last June's graduation at Franklin High School just outside of Milwaukee, three of the four students who tied for valedictorian were girls. Among the National Honor Society members, 76% were girls. And girls comprised 85% of the students on Franklin's 4.0 honor roll.

From this article

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Android blog - Phillip K Dick human likereplica

Axbo Sleep Phase Alarm Clock review!

A some of you know, I have always been trying to improve the quality of my hyperbusy life.

Continuous commitments with different things keep me always short of time to do all what I want to do, and I think I am not the only one!

Recently the Austrian Axbo company was kind enough to send me one of their latest models of clocks for review, the Axbo Sleep Phase Alarm Clock...

How is a sleep alarm clock different from any other clock?

The main difference between a regular alarmt clock and the Axbo Sleep Phase Alarm Clock lies on WHEN the clock wakes you up.

If you know about sleep –and if not you should get informed as this is a crucial part of your life-, you may know that we all go through different cycles while sleeping, falling in and out of deeper and deeper sleep phases as the night progresses.

Some of us sleep better than others, but most of us attain REM sleep at some point during the night. During the deepest phase of sleep, most of our biological functions get regenerated, and ready for the next day. This is also the time where we are truly “recharging our batteries”, if you may. And this is the time that your body does not want you to be woken at!

The reason for this is that, as theory goes, if you are suddenly woken during one of these deep sleep phases, you feel pretty tired. This sensation may last for a few hours or for the whole day, but the end result is always the same: going through chores is harder than usual...you know that you didn’t sleep well...you may be even grumpy because of it.

Now contrary to this situation, it is also said that if you manage to wake someone up softly at the exact time when they are not sleeping deeply, this makes the person feel pretty refreshed and well rested upon awakening, and this sensation can also last for many hours...generally improving the quality of our life.

Now here is where the Axbo Sleep Phase Alarm Clock comes in. This cutting edge clock promises to do just that, getting you to feel each morning “as fresh as a lettuce”, as they say in Spain...but does it deliver?

My experience with the Axbo Sleep Phase Alarm Clock

The clock is set by means of a scroll whell and a couple of buttons quite well hidden on its side.

The first time I set it up, I had some difficulty getting used to the scroll whell system, but after that it is pretty instinctive to set up. (I had to look at the instructions again the next day to remember how to turn the alarm off, but that is just me, maybe you have a better memory! J)

Certainly you have to at least quickly scan through the instructions manual on the first day, since the buttons are not self explanatory, but having a quick look at the little booklet that accompanies the clock is enough to get the feel for the clock’s functions. In any case, the instructions are quite clear and also have a “quick reference sheet” for the main things you may need to do with the clock, in case you need help later.

The overal waking experience with the clock has been, after almost two weeks of testing, quite satisfactory. The clock, through a sensor in a wrist-strap provided (actually, there are two provided with the clock) detects when is the best time to wake you up in the half hour preceeding your set wake up time. Why does it do this? Simply because at the exact time that you set the clock to, you may be sleeping deeply and it would be a pretty bad time to wake you up!

Thus, based on the information that the wireless sensor on your wrist is sending to it, the clock will wake you just at the “right” time, in the minutes preceeding your chosen wake up time.

Does it work? YES, it sure does! Not only has the clock helped me to wake up feeling refreshed every single time I have used it –about eleven times so far- but it has also allowed me to have a full day work, then go to sleep say...for two hours, and then wake up to keep on working without feeling extremely tired. (in fact, feeling quite ok)

So, in theory, there are at least two ways that the clock can help you: it makes you feel better when you wake up every day, and it allows you to naturally increase your sleep debt on the occassions when you may need it, without using Red Bull, coke, coffee, or any other stimulant, which you know I am not very fond of.

(Of course you will need to recoup the hours that you don’t sleep at some time, since cutting off radically in your sleep can harm your health, unless you sistematically follow a routine to get used to Polyphasic sleep.)

The clock also features some pre-determined sounds (waves, forest...) that you can use to help you sleep. Although I have not used those, it is a great idea to have them there in case you need them!

The Axbo sleep alarm clock is also nice as a present

The clock comes in a pretty double folded cubical box. The futuristic corporate orange black and white colour combination make the box quite pleasing to look at.

This is the first thing I liked about it, since it would ensure a good first impression if you are giving this clock as a present to someone else. (and it is a great present.. I mean who wouldn’t like to feel refreshed when they wake up? Who do you know that doesn’t sleep?)

Usage and features

The clock comes with all the accessories you will need for it, including a lightweight charger with very handy adaptors for different countries: UK, US, European, etc...so wherever you go you’ll be able to use and recharge the clock.

There are also in the package two wristbands, so that the clock can wake up two people at the optimum time. This is quite handy, and together with the software provided –a cool little application that lets you see your sleep patterns in graph form- can analyze the quality of your sleep for the two people using the device.

The clock itself looks pretty nice, a square-shaped all white plastic box with small round corners and a unique, hidden set of three buttons on the top right corner.

The company also offers a power nap option when you register your clock on their website, axbo.com, which is at the moment a software update –easy to do with the USB cable that connects to the clock- but in the future will come already as part of the clock’s functions.

Is the Axbo’s price justified?

I would say...definitely, it is. The clock has proved not only to do exactly what it says it would do, but also to do it effectively, every time. It is also well built and comes with two wireless bracelets.

If you are not spending money on things that can really improve the quality of your life, what are you spending your money on?

The Axbo is definitely one of those devices I bought through the years that I would call “a good investment”. Moreover, I believe that this clock will be able to its job for many more years to come. And this doesn’t happen too often with gadgets!

Also being so minimalistic whitey-modern, the clock looks nice wherever you place it, and with the software updates you could add options to it that are not present in the model you buy, keeping always up to date.

So my final verdict is that yes, the price is ok, if you look at it for what it is: not an alarm clock, but rather an advanced little computer that looks like a clock!

What’s the best about it?

Well, as you know, design is very important for me. And the Axbo clock doesn’t dissapoint on that front. I love the translucent blue-lit screens that you can turn on with the push of a button in the wristband. It is also good that the modern, yet neutral design of the clock and its functionality make it a good present that nobody could dislike on first sight.

Of course, the functions of the clock, which are the most important thing, are also quite satisfactory. The clock really wakes you up at a good time, as it promises.

What could be improved upon?

This product is quite good as it is, so I feel only minor details could be bettered in the clock, none of them affecting either its operation or the quality of your sleep:

- the quality of the wrist strap could perhaps be improved. Somehow I have the impression that it won’t look good for too long if I wear it every day. I don’t particularly like the grey colour either, but understand that any other colour would be a risky choice, and white would get dirty far too soon. (What about black? Yes, I know it would not match the clock, I know J ...but still! Orange would match the brand colours, but looks ridiculous on your wrist!)

Another thing I would get rid of is the weird SPAC little rubber label on the side of the clock. In my opinion, it spoils the general minimalistic design of the clock so much, that I am considering getting rid of it altogether! (don’t tell anybody)

Maybe the Axbo guys could get rid of it or perhaps place it, in tiny letters, painted inside the clock itself. Either case, I don’t know what SPAC means, and I doubt that other people would care for it either. (I was later told by the company that it is the abbreviation for Sleep Phase Alarm Clock)

The size of the clock is also something that I would change in the next models. Does it really have to be that big? It is not like massive or anything, but I have a cluttered drawer on my bed side table, and the clock has had a hard time competing for space with my lamp, a couple of books and my breakfast tray when I work from the bed.

Should it be possible, it would be nice to have the sound quality improved, although I realise that this may be to much to ask for, particularly if in the future Axbo makes this clocks smaller.

In conclusion: a great alarm clock that can help you feel well rested every day

The main promise behind the Axbo sleep alarm clock is that it can help you attain a better quality of life by waking you up at an optimum moment. Does it do this? Yes it does, and pretty well, thank you!

Would I recommend it? Yes, definitely. You can buy it through their website:

http://www.axbo.com

Get one of your own and start enjoying better quality of sleep now!

...........
Javier Marti.
Author. Futurist. Consultant.
Founder of Trendirama.com, Trendinews.com and Trendirama.tv

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The beginning of the end of the human race

When I talk about this with my friends, they think I am crazy. I tell them that the world is about to change radically, since we are becoming increasingly attached to machines that don't feel anything for us. (maybe the fact that they are not really alive would explain that) I always show them my favourite robot video, but they still think I am crazy...but hey, it is not my fault if I can see the future ;) .

"the results imply that current robot technology is surprisingly close to achieving [sustained] autonomous bonding and socialization with human toddlers."

And the future is already here! Have a look yourself
http://sciencenow.sciencemag.org/cgi/content/full/2007/1105/2
http://www.trendirama.tv/video/119082-introducing-zeno.html
http://www.trendirama.tv/video/7473--invertuality-a-message-from-jules.html

And finally, have a look at this article (a joke, or not a joke anymore?) from Wired:
10 reasons I'd rather marry a robot



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Before you aske me again why I don't have a girlfriend...

...remember that I live in the UK. And read this article first. Of course not all women are like this, but when you see these things day in and day out, you start to wonder how psychologically healthy these women are...

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Yes! My country will be the first to receive the $100(ish) laptops

Continuing with a long tradition of the best possible education in a developing country (the politically correct way to call poor countries being sucked of their best resources for countless years) my original country, Uruguay , will be the first to receive the ridiculous looking but very important cheapy laptops. Yes!!


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"Learning to be happy for extremely competitive dummies"

This is a comment left here to this article (with video), regarding someone similar to myself.
//////
I've said it before and I'll say it again. One of the most refreshing things in this blog is to sense that Frank is able to use his money to live a high quality life, unlike the person of the video in this post's links.
The ex-owner of Paypal presents clear signs of serious psychological imbalance. I am sorry for him. His excessive competitiveness doesn't allow him to enjoy the present moment, thus he cannot enjoy life. That's why he feels sad when he is not busy.
I know what's to feel that push forward that he feels, because I am (was?) similar. I spent 10 years of my life being dominated by it. Now I fight against it, trying to live a healthier and more balanced life. And I feel better than ever.
What's all the money doing for that person? Nothing. He is not even spending it in a good chair and a good desk, for what we can see in that video. He is not unpacking his things. And he presents in his body language many clear signs of stress, although he appears calm. Isn't it odd? He seems to be very stressed out and letting his life -and possibly partner- slip away. He is not able to disconnect from his urge to win. It is just that this is not an urge to win, but just to compete. And the competition is against himself, so he can never win.
He feels he has to prove something. His life is dominated by others, and by what others think of him. His self esteem depends on the outside world.
If he is not "producing" he feels he is not doing anything useful. He works 15 hours a day or more. Once he sold his company, he felt worthless.
I am sorry for him. He should look for help as soon as possible.
Of course many of us will say -particularly thos of us that are like him and me- "what the hell do you know Javier, he is free to live his life in any way he wants!" and it is true...as long as he is happy. But he doesn't seem happy at all. Id' bet he is not. Frank seems much happier and more balanced than him. I strive to be a more balanced person myself.
There is a time when you lose contact with reality. When you cannot enjoy the smell of a flower anymore, or the beauty of a sunset...you just are here physically but you are already somewhere else mentally. Always somewhere else. Never in the present. Never really being where you are. Never enjoying quality time. You have lost perspective. It is hard for you to laugh at yourself, and at how ridiculous things can be sometimes. You are too busy for that.
He feels he hasn't learnt anything if he doesn't sell his next company for more money than the last one. But with the next company he won't be happy either, we all know that.
He only feels alive when he is working, because that disctracts him from the things he feels are wrong...it distracts him from the voice of the father critic inside him that whispers all the time behind his ear "you are not good enough".
He is looking for fulfillment in the wrong places. The best thing that can happen to him is something that brings him back to reality fast. At the moment, the only thing that differentiates him from a robot are his biological functions.
There is a time to compete. There is a time to stop. There is a time just be, and love yourself and the people that loves you because you are you, not because you sold paypal for 1.X billion. And there is a time to appreciate your life, your health, the air you breath, the food you eat and the fact that the sun came up the horizon one more day.
In one hand I admire such a strong drive in a person, and this guy's technical knowledge is clearly outstanding. But has he learn anything about life itself during his 33(?) years? I hope he does soon, otherwise he'll end up like the many of our generation (I am 32)...extremely rich...extremely lonely...extremely empty.
I hope he changes before that happens and stop making wealthy and happy everyone around him...except himself.

Regards,

Javier Marti
Trendirama.com


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Fatsecret and a virtual assitant's website

Fatsecret is here, and the other one, asksunday, is here

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Who negotiates salary better: men or women?

My friends email:

Negotiating to Win

Why too many women don't ask for what they want, keeping big jobs and
top salaries out of reach.
Recent studies show that women, even at the highest levels of business,
perceive negotiation negatively, while men almost relish it. And when
it
comes to negotiating pay it's costing women dearly.
Though women hold nearly half of the management level jobs in the U.S.
work force, on average, white women earn 78 cents for every dollar a
male earns. Minority women earn even less, with African-American women
making 67 cents and Latina women being paid 56 cents on the dollar.
However, mounting evidence across many professional fields shows even
when everything else is equal, men make more money for doing the same
job. The reasons? Several independent researchers have established a
stunning new theory: Women aren't very good at negotiating for the
salaries they deserve. In fact, women are less likely than men to
engage
in negotiations.
Men view the negotiation process positively, as sort of a game, while
women find it painful,
Women and men both made lower offers to women, and both sexes demanded
more from women, according to a study at the University of Vermont.
Women negotiate less, do it less effectively and tend to take the whole
process personally,
While it is nice to believe the world is a meritocracy in which money
follows performance, the evidence shows otherwise. The good news is
that
negotiating is a teachable skill and one that can be depersonalized as
an experience by gathering data and reducing ambiguity.
http://www.pinkmagazine.com/exclusives/negotiatingToWin_0605_2.html

My reply

The problem is with individuals, not genders. Some of us are pussies on this issue, some of us are not.
Marta Stewart, Condolezza Rice, Annita Roderick(?)(Bodyshop founder), Fiorina (ex-president of HP), Vanessa Myers (Google), Hillary Clinton...are women that not only probably don't shy away from negotiations, but have very clear what they want to earn and price themselves accordingly.
Beware of articles based on studies that, although make us feel better, also helps us to justify our fears or mediocrity.
It is ok not to like to negotiate. I am a man and hate it deeply, perhaps undervaluing myself when I work for others. Why? Because I hate to feel and be treated as merchandise. And I know I am much more than the money I make or I have in the bank.
You either like bargaining, or you don't. Doesn't matter if you are a man or a woman.
And everyone will try to take advantage of you if they are to negotiate your pay, no matter if they are men or women.

> Men view the negotiation process positively, as sort
> of a game, while
Stupid generalization. Not true.

> women find it painful,
Aaaaaawwwww...poor, poor women! ;) Come on, give me a break! I know some women that are 100 times worse than men (my ex-boss wife: if you even engage in conversation with her, you are probably losing money!)

> Women and men both made lower offers to women, and
> both sexes demanded
> more from women,

Hard to believe. I see men being pressurized as well, and depending of the society, if a woman fails, people are softer with them. If a man fails, there is no mercy (generally) Women have a little extra credit. Women are more likely to ge given another opportunity whereas a man would be sacked on the spot. (from my experience as a worker and manager)

> Women negotiate less, do it less effectively and
> tend to take the whole
> process personally,

Men take it maybe more personally than women. Don't believe me? Read about the unemployed men in Japan who die of starvation (in Tokio!) before asking for help or food. Read about the psychological studies that say that men associate their identity with their job much more than women do. If that's not taking it personally, you tell me what is!

> While it is nice to believe the world is a
> meritocracy in which money
> follows performance, the evidence shows otherwise.

The glass ceiling is not there anymore for women, I think. It seems that it is there, but it is not. The capital today doesn't care if you are a man or woman. Investors only want results. If you are damn good at your job ad make your company a lot of money and are smart enough to do this in a visible way, you'll be promoted and earning millions, as the women I mentioned above do.

> The good news is that
> negotiating is a teachable skill and one that can be
> depersonalized as
> an experience by gathering data and reducing
> ambiguity.

True. The problem is if you hate it, like me :)
Then you'd better get rich on your own.

Summarizing...I know you don't like my opinion, but get informed about it, 'cause I am right ;) : in the future there is less and less work for all of us, men or women, particularly in the developed world.
Read this article for more
We should be thinking on how to prepare for this, regardless of our gender.

Kiss

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Hilarious rap song translation

Sometimes I have also wondered what certain rap songs mean. Now I know...at least this song has been properly translated into English :)


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How the banking and money system work

Simple and easy to understand.

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Too much time in your hands and a twisted mind...

...can create something like this


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