The Other Sides Of Me

i know it is such ungrateful to rant about this and that or wish we could have this instead of that, but im writing this as a lesson for me as well as you who read this.

• if i were still studying in the states, i would have finish studying by this may 2009.
• if i were to finish study by this may, i could have brought my family traveling in the states.
• if i were still in RPI, i would have not enrolled to uniten and met wonderful (plus the not so wonderful ones) people here.
• if i were still in the states, i would have got my amarela cordao and learnt so many skills in capoeira by now. (i miss the instructors, friends and all capoeristas in NY)
• if i were still in Troy, i would have made a lot of money by working with sodexho. (oh i miss Chris the supervisor and other crews as well)
• if i were in my room in Colonie right now, i would have downloaded so many torrents that i could watch them the whole day.
• if i were still in the states, i could have watched my fav tv shows and cartoons back to back whenever i like.
• if i were still in RPI, i would have been fitter than now because Mueller Center had been my second home.
• if i were still in the states, i could have been fairer because the sun is only out about 4 month per year. (miss the fall season!)
• if i were still in the states, …..

ok thats good enough. the list will go on and on just because i miss the good old days, the opportunities that i’ve thrown just like that because of my carelessness. its like climbing a very tall tree. at the beginning, i was given a ladder to climb it up and almost reached the top then all of sudden, because i was too ecstatic, i slipped and fell down to the very bottom. now i have to climb it back by myself without the ladder and now i know how hard it is to be successful. it took me merely a year to finally accept that im no longer there. no matter how hard i try to wish for this and that and compare what i had back then, the past will be history. now its time to move on and thanks to family, friends, and all who supported me physically and mentally. tell you, this is yet the hardest mental challenge i’ve faced. with neighbors making rumors why im back home, people asking why did i enroll degree late, some relatives and cousins who dont even now ive been back for good, and so many more..im grateful that ive been given enough strength to confront all of this. i know running away from reality will take you nowhere so the best thing is to face it.

lessons learnt- God will not test you unless He knows you are strong enough to confront it and also, only God knows whats the best for us. maybe He has better plan for me in future. perhaps He wants me to experience something back there and use that experience to face the more challenging future ahead.

To my friends who are still crying over their spilt milk, dont just stare and cry at it. Look for cloth or any material to wipe it out so that the place will be clean again. and remember, next time use better glass and be more careful not to spill the milk again 😉

i really2 miss this moment!

me and tan went sledding

abg long’s treat for my bday

went camping during summer

while waiting for the event to start me and aliba playing chess in the guests room

hari ni genap 20 hari…haha betul ke ni?? 😛

like my friend said in her blog, a big sister (i know literally im not big..haha) holds a big responsibility on her siblings. with my other 2 sisters being afar from home, im the one who is responsible for both my younger brothers.  it saddens me to know that one of  my younger brothers actually smokes! he was caught by my eldest sis during my family vacation at my sis’ place. he is only 16 for goodness’ sake plus, my dad doesnt smoke at all and how come he got involved in this kind of thing? well, i know if a dad doesnt smoke, doesnt mean the son would not, but i just cant accept that he havent finished his school yet to start trying those things..i dont know what will happen if my dad knows about this..im sure he will get very angry..so if you were me, what would you do to advice your brother?

announcer: this blog will be idle for a while since the writer is busy with the finals..( :P) and she will only have the mood to write until everything is over. her exam schedule is as below:

march 26th: EEEB 233 Signal & Systems

march 27th: ISLB 113 Islamic Studies 1

march 30th: EEEB 273 Electronics Analysis & Design 2

april 1st : EEEB 283 EMD

for the time being, if you miss her, just  drop some comments. 😉

“aku bersukan jugak tp weakness aku xjage makan je…”

“aku xdela jage makan sgt pon, just makan bnd yg sihat je..dulu xjage pon tp since masuk capoeira kt sane dulu r..instructor aku kasi advice sume..yela, org2 yg bersukan or atlit kat sane mmg jage mkn so aku terikut2 r skali.”

what it is all about?? hehe until next entry…daaaa~ 😉 😛