So many of you have requested an invite to my private blog but you NEED to leave me an email address. 
Or you can email me at [email protected]
PLEASE send some info on who you are and how long you've been fostering.  When I check in to see who's reading the blog I like to be able to put a name with a 'face' (so to speak).  Thanks :)


With the agency merging with the county there are SO many changes.  The agency worker is here twice a month.  Today he brought Sprout home from the visit.  He stayed for a while and we chatted.  With Sprout being so young I think him sleeping in the car seat qualifies as 'observing him in the home'.  Anyway,  we had a very open conversation today and  I was given some new info that made me very emotional.  (That info can be found here)  I am trying SO hard to just be a spectator on this journey but holding Sprout and staring into his sweet eyes makes it impossible to NOT fall in LOVE with him.  I DO trust God.  If you want to know how best to pray...pray that I am able to FULLY release someone at the county for wronging me.  I do forgive her but I don't want anything standing in the way of Sprout being ours forever.  After the worker left...Sprout and I had an interesting conversation in which he ended with an (almost) smile :) 
He melts me!!  I am looking forward to the future and I trust that God has good things planned for Sprout AND for us!

New post over here :)

New post on the private blog.  More over there soon...I have some thoughts brewing :)

Sprout is up to 3 (1) hour visits per week.  Mom has done nothing to earn the extra time but the county gave it to her anyway.  We'll see how long this lasts. The county GAVE her a voucher for an apartment, GAVE her bus tokens and is holding her hands as she looks for a job.  
Not sure if we're being set-up or not with this whole 'pre-adoptive placement' thing.  As far as I know Sprout WILL NOT be going home to his mom.  There IS a relative who is interested and if this works out...THAT'S who he'll go to OR he'll stay here.  I am continually putting this WHOLE situation in God's hands.  We will know more in the next few weeks.  It's ok with me to be transporting him up the visits because I have heard that it's not very likely that i will be doing it for long because bio mom will lose interest.  Sad, but true.  On a happy note we had Sprout's pictures taken and they came out perfect.  He is such a sweet boy.  I hold him in my arms and I'm in awe of how FAITHFUL God is.  I know I shouldn't be surprised but to have him HERE in my ARMS...it's an amazing feeling. 

Sprout is ONE MONTH OLD!!!

At 4 weeks old you are...

Eating 4 ounces every 3 hours. 
Sometimes you go 4 or 5 hours between feedings :)
(I wish it was at night!)
You are still in Newborn diapers.
Wearing Newborn and 0-3 month clothes. 
A bit fussy at times (I think you might have reflux)  :(
Starting to make more eye contact and focus on faces more.
You love to be swaddled still.
Still taking the pacifier. 
Sometimes you hold my finger SO tight while you're eating. 
Last dr visit (at 2 weeks) you were 7lbs 6 ounces and 20 inches!
LOVE to be held.
Listen to white noise while you rest.
XOXOXO

AND HIS BLOG NAME SHALL BE..........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................SPROUT :)

Bio mom to agency worker :
"See.  You can tell it's my son.  His poop smells JUST like mine!"

Seriously?!??  I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried!!! LoLoL :)

***I don't feel completely comfortable blogging here so I will most likely be updating more on the other blog. ***

 Updates here will be honest but vague.  If you are a long time reader you KNOW that this is the one we've been waiting for.  I am praying that he gets to stay.  He has changed so much in the last few weeks.  It has been a minor adjustment having him around.  Everyone is in LOVE.  What is amazing is that the agency worker has already been out to the house twice in the past few weeks.  That's more than any worker has EVER been out here.  Anyway, we had the chance to discuss baby boy and what's going on at his visits twice a week.  He has me laughing at some of the things that he remembered bio mom said.  She really thinks that because she has a 'room' and is looking for a job that she'll get him back next week.  Delusional.  The poor worker has to endure these visits till bio stops coming...which he guarantees will happen.  I am praying that God has His way in baby boy's life.  We would LOVE to permanently add him to our home but I truly want it to be God's will.  More soon. 

Baby is doing well (and STILL needs a blog name!!!).  It is amazing how little time it took to be completely smitten.  Well, I HAVE known about him since November and to be totally honest I DID fall in love with the IDEA of him many weeks ago.  I still can't believe he's here.  He's growing and changing every day.  Bio mom had a visit this week.  She came prepared.  I know she loves him.  I printed out some pics for her...specifically one of her and the boy.  She was very grateful.  He is sleeping well during the day and getting up a few times at night.  We changed his formula this week so we'll see how much better he does.  Another baby boy was taken into care this week.  He is 3 months old.  the agency couldn't find anyone to take him.  I volunteered but by the time I called the worker he was placed.  I heard from his foster parent that his bio mom didn't show for his first visit this week.  That makes me sad.  I look back at all we've gone through to get to this point of actually having this baby in this house and I am FLOORED by God's faithfulness.  We have already decided as a family that if this baby leaves us we are done fostering.  He has been a welcome addition to this family but we're not sure how much more loss we can take.  I trust God's heart.  He knows my desires.  I am at peace with the journey we are on.  Please pray that this peace STAYS.  I love being at the point of contentment in trusting God's will.  I am not always 'there'.  But I rest in knowing HE IS FAITHFUL! More soon...

I was driving down the street today and a song came on.  The same song that I have listened to for almost a year.  While listening to this song I realized that in this precious little boy, God has shown me redemption.  I am SO at peace with this whole situation.  We have gone from preparing for him, to thinking he was going home with someone else, to bringing him home with us.  God is FAITHFUL!!! I cannot say that enough.  Some of my friends have asked what will happen with his case and I have to be honest...I am NOT at all concerned.  God has given me the grace to get this far and I know He won't let me go now. 

Listen to my song here :)

Falling more and more in love each second he is here :)