Relax

Sunday morning, woke up in a sunny day and my flu has finally gone.

I recalled a song which I first heard in France during the summer of 2009.

It brings me back a lot of good memory.

thanks

Last few weeks it was grey. Time does heal. I knew it, it will be over. I can't see the rainbow yet, but I can see the brightness. I am grateful for what people bring to me. No matter it's from my friends or from people I don't know. I always know that this world is beautiful and I am lucky to have what I have.

I am always positive. Some say I am strong. But sometimes I am just so fragile, or I prefer to be fragile while people can handle "me" with care! Well, but now I better get back to my strong and positive side. I have a feeling that there are many beautiful things waiting for me.

Always happy when I can have a piece of yummi cake!

Let it rain

I don't like rainy day. It just makes everything more sad. It is a sign of sorrow.

Today is Good Friday, the start of Easter holiday. I don't have any feeling for it. Instead, I am going to work. Others may think it is a pity but for myself, I can't wait to fly away. This so called public holiday is not for me, it just makes me suffocated. I would rather have my "holiday" elsewhere far away from those familiar scenes and memories.

Though, I recalled a recent picture I took. It gives me a smile and some comfort. I always look for rainbow especially when I am down. I am always amazed by seeing a rainbow. And as a matter of fact, if there is no rain, there is no rainbow.

I believe, I will find a rainbow again soon, very soon.

Home

Finally back to home, and finally feel like at home. A lot of housework was waiting for me and I also want to make it like home again after away for more than 2 months.

I am happy to come home. But I also feel different, and sometimes lonely. Something has really changed. It hits my mind. But when I think deeply, I know I just need time to get used to it. Afterall, this is what I chose.

Being away made me realize a lot of things, especially when I was weak. I always know that it is never granted when someone is treating me well, but unfortunately what I need is more deep from heart, like care and concern. It was so overwhelming when I got the support I needed. And perhaps, it woke me up from beautiful dreams. Beautiful dreams were of course beautiful, but they will never come true.

Done my first flight, smooth and nice. But the emotional me still had some feelings arising while going to work. I could be spoiled, but I gave it up. Contradicting feeling.... anyhow, I keep telling myself, it should be a good start again, new work, new life!

nothing is better than at home

It is time for a change. Just made a new look for my blog. It is more simple but still shows "me"!

Always wanted to write something about my stay in Amsterdam but I just do it now after staying almost 2 months. The feeling of returning to this place is just like returning home: so familiar and there is no change. Perhaps what has changed most is me. During this stay, I have seen much more that I didn't see. I have tried more different things that I wouldn't try before. I knew that I would enjoy the stay here.

But what I could not expect is that I would have a sad incident while everything seemed to be so good. Life is really unpredictable. The sad time has been with me last few days and I know it has to go. Keeping the good memories and looking forward are the best for now. I believe that we could learn something from any incident. There is nothing "for sure" and you never know what will happen in the next second. Not to mention that someone could just leave this world suddenly, even just an unexpected farewell with someone you see everyday strike our hearts.

I am too lucky that I have not seen many bad people in my life. Now when I saw how cunning and hyprocritical people can be, it is just too much and too terrible.

I can't wait to go back home and see my family and friends who I know I will never have fear with!!

JAN 4

It is supposed to be a memorable day. Now I just want this day has never existed. If this day has never existed, I would not have had the punishment today. I would not have had lived in a dream.

Why is it always so painful when you devoted for nothing? The difference in value is really so essential, I just realized.

As it is just a dream, I should not have any laughter or tear. I guess I just need to get up and live for reality.

很遺憾, 緣份一次又一次把我們拉在一起, 令我們相愛, 可惜我們不能相知, 更不能相處。我以為相愛就不應該放棄, 但原來, 你早就放棄了我, 放棄了我們的感情。今天, 我放手了, 讓你自由, 這樣, 我們都會更好的。