Obama Motors’ newest release: The Dodge Despot


Image

(H/T: Doug Ross)

Political Humor – High in the Air


High In The Air

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

… The man consulted his portable GPS and Replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level.. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.”
She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be a Republican.” I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?” “Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and I’m still lost.. Frankly, you’ve not been much help to me.”
The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Democrat.” “I am,” replied the balloonist. “How did you know?”
“Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going. You’ve risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect ME to solve your problem. You’re in EXACTLY the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s MY fault…

Air Force Solving Problems


Air Force General: Mr. President, we’ve just invented an invisibility cloak for Air Force One.
Obama: No Way?
Air Force General: That’s right, sir, the plane will be invisible. Will you be going along on its maiden flight?
Obama: Wouldn’t miss it for the world.
Air Force General: Have a good trip, sir.Image

(Air Force Solving Problems courtesy of Doug Ross)

PROOF: It’s the Leftists who hate the children*


ImageJust found this tidbit amongst all of the election and political news via the Drudge Report Twitter feed….in San Francisco…they hate kids:

San Francisco on Tuesday became the first major U.S. city to pass a law that cracks down on the popular practice of giving away free toys with unhealthy restaurant meals for children.

San Francisco’s Board of Supervisors passed the law on a veto-proof 8-to-3 vote. It takes effect on December 1, 2011.

Because they HATE the children.   Can’t we all just get along?  Stop the hate.* 

Oh…and because the government needs to tell the Leftist sheep in SF what is and is not healthy for them.   Don’t entice the children, you know. 

Let’s see if I get this straight, though…let’s follow the logic, or lack thereof, of SF’s “leaders”–

Happy Meals bad for the children.

Pot good for children at baseball games.

That logic completely explains the wins by Moonbeam Brown and Babs Boxer yesterday in the once-great state of California.

*for the no-humor leftists who read this blog…this is called humor.  If you don’t get it, then let’s meet at the nearest Micky D’s and discuss it over a Happy Meal.

Laugh for the Day – Barack Obama


ImageObama met with business leaders at a roundtable meeting today.  Apparently being defensive about  ..hhuummmhh…huummhhh..(clearing throat) … his ideology, Obama had this to say:

“Contrary to the claims of some of my critics, I am an ardent believer in the free market.”

LOLOLOLOL….

You know they say laughing is healthy. 

Michelle Obama would be happy to know that her husband is giving us a good dose of healthy today….being healthy counters obesity  …dontcha  know.

I guess it really depends on what the meaning of “ardent believer” is.  Does it mean:

And I could go on….

But actually, when I think about it….it isn’t all that funny.  This man actually seems to think people will believe his lying lips when his actions say so much. 

Kind of sad when a sitting President of the United States of America has to defend himself as an “ardent believer in free markets”.    (“…I am….no really I am….”)

It’s sooooo cold….


Image(H/T: RedState.com)

E-mail of the day: “My dog is a democrat”


A funny for Monday…this e-mail was sent to Don Surber from one of his conservative readers:

My Dog…

My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day. He has his food prepared for him. He can eat whenever he wants, 24/7/365. His meals are provided at no cost to him. He visits the Dr. once a year for his checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this, he pays nothing, and nothing is required of him. He lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than he needs, but he is not required to do any upkeep. If he makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. He has his choice of luxurious places to sleep. He receives these accommodations absolutely free. He is living like a king, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of his costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day. I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head: Holy S##t!!!

My dog is a Democrat!

(H/T: Doug Ross)

Oh how I miss THIS kind of humor from our leader


Hey Obama — listen up…..this is what humor looks like.  So shed the thin skin and narcissistic self-centeredness and try a little humor sometime.

We all know how George Bush was masterful at self-deprecating humor and great funny moments with the Press Club.

Now Sarah Palin exhibits the humor that is missing from the current administration.   She is comfortable in her skin — just as President Bush was — and is able to pull off such great humor lines.

According to reports, Palin was able to poke fun at herself, the politicians in the room, Obama, Democrats, Joe Biden, and the McCain campaign.

Try these on for size….Sarah Palin speaking at the winter dinner of the Gridiron Club, an organization of Washington-based journalists:

  • As for the president, Palin joked that she was looking at a magazine cover of Obama and Chinese president Hu Jinato during an airplane flight. A nearby passenger stated, “Hu’s the Communist,” she related.  And, Palin said, “I thought he was asking a question.”
  • “Sometimes you got to trust your instincts, and if you don’t, you end up in a place like this,” said the former GOP vice presidential candidate.
  • Sarah Palin poked fun at herself in a speech to journalists Saturday night, drawing laughter when she announced she “came down from my hotel room and I could see the Russian embassy.”
  • The 2008 Republican vice presidential candidate also joked that she had originally thought of titling her book “How To Look Like a Million Bucks, for Only $150,000” before settling on “Going Rogue.”
  • If the election had turned out differently, she said, “I could be the one overseeing the signing of bailout checks and vice president Biden could be on the road selling his book, ‘Going Rogaine.'” Biden has sparse hair.
  • As for her hosts, she said she was glad to be appearing before an elite audience of leading intellectuals, “or as I like to call it, a death panel.”
  • McCain’s campaign staff also came in for a barb from the former Alaska governor when she said she is touring the country by bus as she sells her book.  “The view is so much better from inside the bus than under it,” she said, referring to the poisonous relations between her and some of the McCain campaign staff.
  • Focusing on criticism she has received from Steve Schmidt, a senior strategist in McCain’s presidential campaign, she said, “If I need a bald campaign manager I guess I’m left with James Carville,” a Democrat.

Obama are you taking notes?

(H/T: Michelle Malkin and Politico)

UPDATE:  Thanks for the link from A Conservative Teacher!

Best comments and jokes today about our Dear Leader’s “Nobelity”


 “Obama The Nobel”….warrior of peace.  And winner of great prize money.

First off, Michelle Malkin has asked:  What should Obama do with the $1.4 million prize money?

Some great ideas from Michelle’s commenters:

  • Save or create 28 new jobs.
  • (Get) Ego reduction surgery.
  • How about taking his Auntie off the backs of us Massachusetts taxpayers and getting his brother a bigger box to live in…?
  • Buy rockets and explosives for Hamas.
  • Pay Geithner’s back taxes?
  • Maybe Spock could get his ears bobbed?
  • Aren’t there wounded soldiers he could help? Not ours – you know, the ones on his side.
  • That ought to just about pay for a genealogist to ‘find’ Obama’s ancestral connections to Jesus, Mohammed and Buddha

That reminds me of the Barackwell painting…..

origin unknown (I mean the creator of this image, not Obama!)

origin unknown (I mean the creator of this image, not Obama!)

My own thought was that since this “prize” money is kind of like a bonus, and Obama himself accepted the ego “stimulus”  from the Nobel committee, shouldn’t he be taxed at like 90% on that money or something?

And, of course, some in near the White House don’t see the humor. DNC Communications Director Brad Woodhouse had this to say about it:

“The Republican Party has thrown in its lot with the terrorists – the Taliban and Hamas this morning – in criticizing the President for receiving the Nobel Peace prize,” DNC communications director Brad Woodhouse told POLITICO. “Republicans cheered when America failed to land the Olympics and now they are criticizing the President of the United States for receiving the Nobel Peace prize – an award he did not seek but that is nonetheless an honor in which every American can take great pride – unless of course you are the Republican Party.

So, add “terrorist” to the list of names conservatives and those who oppose Obama’s weakness and policies have been called…(I think they are running out of names because I could swear that we’ve all been called terrorists before)….

…but in the age of “Obama The Nobel”, aren’t we ALL terrorists now…we are one…kumbaya?

Oh….and with Obama’s undeserved win, according to the WH DNC director, we are just not “proud” of our country, cuz, you know, we should take pride in a leader who trashes our country and even proclaimed himself as undeserving of the “prize”, but will accept that small BONUS “prize” money, nonetheless……

Yet, still…its pretty humorous for a fall Friday….as you can see below:

Commenter RetFireman at Michelle Malkin:

I just found out I won a Golden Globe AND an Oscar, and all I did was imagine writing a script and hope it would get produced.

Just can’t shake this feeling I don’t really deserve this.

And please…don’t laugh. It hurts my feelings, and when you do, the terrorists win.

Commenter BeHiker at Michelle Malkin:

Just saw this on Twitter… “8 year old kid inducted into Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in anticipation of getting his first guitar this upcoming Christmas.”

At Ace of Spades, Obama’s other Victories

From Treacheron Twitter (H/T Ace of Spades): “Obama also won the Nobel Prize in Medicine for his groundbreaking work in preventing unneeded amputations and tonsillectomies.”

 Now, from Harry Reid, of all people:

“By ushering in a period of optimism in American politics, President Obama has become a great source of pride and inspiration for many Americans. I congratulate the President on this tremendous honor that he has earned with his dedication to a new type of politics based on hope instead of fear. I am confident that the President will work to continue to live up the ideals of this award throughout his term in office.”

What?  Harry Reid wasn’t kidding?….That is most humorous of all!

The Things (Conservative) Kids Say


sarah-palin-rnc-speechMy young elementary-age daughter came home from school on Monday with a new book.   Her teacher assigned her to read a chapter a night and write about each chapter when completed.

My daughter was excited about the new homework assignment and reading a “real” chapter book….

When she came home, she began to inform us of this children’s story about a widowed farmer in 19th century Kansas…..her sentence went something like this:

“Mom, Dad,…..My teacher gave me this chapter book to read…. “Sarah Palin Tall” ! 

(The children’s book is Sarah, Plain and Tall by Patricia MacLachlan)

That gave this conservative household a good ‘ol laugh!

Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started