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thy- lady's profile ☆·´¯`·.rebecca¸.··.¸´¯`· 
♥Attached To ♥ Mr kelvin Teo :) 
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Her Desires
❤ Driving licence ❤ Gain more pounds till i hit 45kg ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ Epilator ❤ ❤ Another getaway holiday *hehee eternal life of : ❤ truckloads of happiness ❤ family and frds ❤ bad memory Scream here ! 
Memories
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
May 2007
June 2007
July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
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finally, my flu has started to clear off, juz occasionally producing bits of honey syrup x) went for the flu vaccination tdy with xiuhui and yaty - free !!! and there's so many side effects after the jab, and whole day, i m feelin god damn tired -.- urghhh, tdy is the last day of attachemtn of everyone, but i still need to go back to ward tmr and on monday,monday will be my last make up =) and lucky tml gt zahira to accompany me and the nyp student and my all time favourite en ^^ [ ... 28 september 06 ...] went bk sch for sims training tdy =] god damn taxi fare, paid $15 juz for it in the morning, super ex .. i wish next term in campus can be longer, reali love studyin riite nw thou there's exams and common test bt at least better den attachment, heez, coz can slp in class when tired and sit all day long n enjoy the air con ^^ went tampines with bekah sabrina and xiuhui after tt .. and i saw .. CHOCOLATE in the interchange x) so dark, so delicious, hurhurr .. went tm with the girls and finally i haf gt the color contacts. shopped shoped and shopped till 7 plus den go hm, hehehe .. reali enjoy the times tt i gt to spend with them coz for the apst few weeks, we reali hasnt been spending much time tgt, they always rocks my word so much !!!! and its time for swimming next week i miss the chlorine smell, and of coz the sun x) and my chocolate fondue feast at marina, i m still waiting .. and to all my peeps out dere, thanks for helping to purchase the moonies frm my sister x) hope u all enjoy ur mooncake festival - time to meddle with lots of lighted candles counting dw to school reopen - 9 days ! counting dw to my cheng teng .. i wiish it ll rain riite nw, so no one can tell tt im crying =] it hurts so much till i wanna die, till tears juz dropped on its own i dowana believe in tis fairytale anymore, leaving, stepping back, throwing everyting aside, juz to make sure i dun fall into the pit of sorrows again back to sch tmr =] 3 more working days ! urghhhh f*ck it, i feel so messed up these 2 days, reason is clear, haiz i hope tis feeling of messiness will go away soon i dun even wanto tink abt it, if only in the first place, u've left me alone =] omg, i reali need to hide the mooncake my sister has made - the chocolate mooncake ! it taste so heavenly ! it reali lift my spirit in tt spilt second x) nahh, tis is the mooncake : in chocolate flavour !  cool isnt it ! it looks so darkbut it reali tste so heavenly tt i goes : oh my freakin god x) good job sis ! make more make more, lidat i wont feel so sad everyday, whahaha i need to climb to the peak of the mountain and ... shout all my frustrations out yes i need to get it out of my hert if nt i duno when i will explode or break dw again .. i m fuckin siick of all these shits please, get them off me, if tts impossible den i shall keep my way out of all dese. work practically tdy simply sucks for everyone i guess the mood in the ward is like, freaking blue everyone wasnt in good mood and tt includes me, i wonder wats gg on, perhaps its coz of monday blues. watever, i dun give a damn, and btw tdy is tues isnt so ? watever izzit, i relai wanto shout it all out ! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh leave me alone and dun probe any further counting dw - 6 more attachment days to the end of my misery i dun mind if she change all my shifts to afternoon ^^ work tdy was slacked ~ every afternoon shift are lidat i suppose, unless there's some last minute transfer cases spore idls finale was tdy, the malay guy won ?? hahaa, i dun give a damn, anewae whole group of us was like standing in the unoccpuied single room and watchin the results show, the staff nurses gaf us the permission to go in watch ^^ spotted one sleepy pig snoring away at the sofa downstairs whn i made my way dere =) he has came to fetch me from work .. went and played till 12 plus den come back =) had choong pang chicken wings, whahahaa xD i reali cant resist tt, reali cant, lalaaa and how nice is he, to buy me the eye drop when tis afternoon i complained tt my eyes are reali red and pain =] thanks baldie x) appreciated it damn lots. sayang ur head (.^^) sometimes i wonder, how beautiful can fairytales be ... zzZ i wish i can be forgiving enuff to let go of the past to forgive those who takes part in hurting me, sometimes i see the scars tt remains on my thigh, i reali wonder alot and nevertheless, it nv fails to tell me tt, wat happened has already happened, and we cant return to the past anymore seriously, i feel so sad abt it, i wish tings can be like the past but i noe, it can nv be .. sad coz i realise, how vulnerable a r/s can gets despite hafing it run for so long =] but there's sth i always noe, the barrier tt has benn put up in my heart can nv be removed those who has hurt me before, u can forget abt me forgivin u completely, coz i noe, a small part of my heart still bears a grudge against u no matter how hard i tries to forgive and forget nahh, good night everyone and i love the orh ni bread my sis has amde ! finally !!!!!! heheees and sorrie for sounding so dead in this post coz i m nt reali feeling tt good rite nw =) good nite everyone whee, finally afternoon is over and riite nw, i reali wish sat evening will always stay youngs and nv ends =] went back for my make up tdy, serisously, i guess i m already used to workin on sat and sersiously to be frank, sat is much more nicer to work on ! mainly bcoz i m alone lahh, hahaa, and tings are more settled on sat work tdy is fine but ltr on of the day, so messy but bu guan wo de shi, coz the tings tt are messy, i couldnt help at all hehee coz out of the sudden, 4 pts came and applied for the transplant, to be on the waiting list and the waiting area is like, wahhh ! full house, but i can only sit dere and kiao car, lalaa ... kopitiam fruit juice fuckin ex, ma de, one cup $3 !!!! if i noe the price i so steep, i wont even wanto drink, blame it on houseman ! coz houseman was on fire ytd, whahaha i wish i can be understand for who i m, wat i says and wat i do CAN U PLEASE SPEND SOME TIME TO UNDERSTAND WHAT I M TRYIN TO SAY one drop, two drops, three drops, 4 drops of tears shedded tdy and still keeping track but stop the keeping track coz i dowana cry ! how i m feeling nw, u cant blame it totally on me, or perhaps u cant pt ur finger at me cos i m nt the one who created wat has happened, i noe i can neither blame it on u totally but too bad, if only u haf trust me more and i hear sth good, hear tt after our next term exams, we will be hafin holidays for 6 weeks b4 we wgo for our CPb 2.2. duno how truth izzit but seems tt its quite truth coz other groups are also saying it. wahhh ! if itsd reali truth den it will be damn shiok mann .. time time faster pass, reali hope to graduate soon thou i duno if i will go and work as a nurse first arnot even if work also will be 2 years only, for the sake of workin experience Arghhhhhhh can life be more simple ? riite nw i juz feel, the longer things are being drag, it becomes more complicated the klonger tings are being dragged, feelings start to fade sumtyme i reali wonder .. urggghhhh, watever, i dun even noe it myself, coz it has been such a long time first, i wanna scream at my smelly sister WHERE'S MY OH NI ??? oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni oh ni i wanna eat oh ni lahh (_") i dowan ur oh ni moon cake unless the skin is the traditional one ^^ let's see her products : http://karlsfoodie.blogspot.com/2006/09/teochew-mooncake.html and she told me, she gaf all the mooncakes she had made all away liao -.- oh ni oh ni .. even if i take ur mooncake, its also because of the oh ni inside, whahaha =x see, the orh ni tt i miss so much, sob : http://karlsfoodie.blogspot.com/2006/07/aka-orh-ni.html work is like .. arghhh, at first is nice but at the latter on of the day, zahira and me bcome so irritated out of e sudden yahh so fuckin irritated with everyting in our ward .. haiz ~ all the fake smiles tt we put on when we enter the door when answering all the ridicuolous callbell its reali fake, till u can hardly imagine, kekeee upcoming bbq organised by dawn in oct, looking forward to it will be fun i suppose and i hope he will go with me =] still nt feelin tt well nose bleed juz nw, take such a long time to stop but i m glad tt my flu is getting better =] i wanna be well so i can be more active in my attachment and nt feel like dyin all the time =x hotcakes for breakfast tmr ^^ anyone, wanna join me ? flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu flu mummy went pray for me tdy, coz last nite i told her i wanna go beat "xiao ren" i tink nt xiaoren but xiaorens .. thou so far i nv experience much backstabbing but better be safe den sorrie =D actually last nite i told her i wanna go pray coz i keep falling sick, muz be bump into sum dirty tings, lol, or offend sth Lol, i m verii traditional one , sths i reali believe when i haf so sway for 2 mths liao bob is my star he saved me, helped me print my bank account statement and bring it dw frm all the way at sengkang t0 farrer pk x) thanks bob may i get well soon i need my health bk .. sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick sick thats all for tdy =) jealous freak, juz coz u dun haf wat i haf, u start complaining n complaining .. shut ur pipi up ! and if u are nt hapii with me for fallin sick, simly juz turn ur bk & walked away, i dun tink i need ur sarcastic remarks sumtymes ur mouth is juz like the toilet mouth, full of shit .. tako pochi juz made me feel better for tt spilt second, apple juice perk me up too .. i love apple juice ^^ oh yeahhh, last nite i dreamt of sth so funny or rather erxin actually earlier on when i reached hm last nite, i saw a cockroach outside my house, sumwhr near the lift, it flew dw frm the ceiling and it almost flew onto me !!!! den ltr on at nite, tis is wat i dreamt : the cockroach flew into my house, sticked on my ceiling. mum took the pesticide and spray at it, but to my horror, the stupid cockraoch tummy keeps blowing up, and in a spilt second the tummy explode and all the juices flew onto my face >.< omg, i still rmb the yucky feeling (_") nahh, missing u =] didnt haf a chance to talk to him in the evening coz i was slping, and he was waiting for my reply. sorrie babe, muacks for sure, no matter wat has happened, u still lit up my life thanks for letting me to hold u in the hands of mine =) ___cherishing bits and pieces of what we are having right nw ___ hope one day we are able to put these bits and pieces together and savour what had formed at the end a r/s filled with unconditioned love a r/s which i believewill stand out stronger den anyone's else coz the hurdles we had went thru, explains everyting =) to wake up and knowing that u are still rite here standing beside me 120104 =) finally i m all settled for the nite =) juz done preparing my breakfast for tmr morning, tot it will take abt 10 minutes but who noes, more den tt, kekee. made egg mayo sandwich with cheese n tomtoe for breakfast tmr ^^ sure be a filling one and hopefully can last me till my breaktime tmr =) hope i ll be hafing break 2 for tmr, heez, dowana go so early coz seems pointless .. met up with baldie tis afternoon again =] actually wanna rest at hm de, but feel like seeing him and also need to replenish my foundation n blusher thanks to esther, hahaa, she went tell him, go out with rebecca lehz, she like verii siian so he asked me i verii boring oh, den i told him yeah yeah, and so, we decided to go sim lim and bugis area to take a walk .. went sim lim juz nw, his ps ll has broken dw, tsk tsk, poor ting, nw his life is so boring at hm, hahaa muz change lens ohh, which cost abt $150 to $180 lidat. lidat might as well he buy a new set or buy psp, tts wat he said =) after tt, went off to bugis to get the stuffs i wanted, whee -.- girls' $ are reali esy to earn within 10 mins, i spent abt $50 juz on my foundation and blusher .. walked around and search for the bag tt i wanted !!!! but didnt get it coz there's no more new piece, sad man .. and i dowan the one on display, lols. coz its a bit stained too .. so suan le, haiz, get it next weekend sumwhere else bahh =) rained so heavily juz nw half way thru while we were at bugis village ! luckiliy, it's shelter, kekeee if nt u will see a drench baldie and caca after tt, went off to hougang to haf dinner b4 makin way to his house - 5 star ! yumm, the black pepper chicken chop is so nice ^^ it juz clear my flu for tt verii moment coz its so spicy =) lols, he looked juz so cool in his cd uniform =) and well, he sent me hm juz b4 he made his way bk to camp .. baldie, so nice to haf u around .. haiz, if only tings can resolved asap but i m reali glad, u tell me everyting abt hw u feel =) i ll too if u give me the chance and if i haf enuff courage to say .. sumtymes i juz fear of ignorance and rejection .. lalaa .. lub lub lub euu i could haf wake up ltr tdy, but my blockled nose stopped me from doing it so =( honey honey honey, so many salty honey beng produced tdy, any buyers ? juz woke up not long ago, kekee .. sunday, pls stay and dun go away, i nd ur existence to be here 4ever so monday wont comes, lols. well, 2 more wks ! 2 more weeks n tts the end of CP 2.2 ! i'm always hafin so much fun when i m with u =') i love the feeling of hafin u in my hands, the feeling of wrapping up in ur arms - everyting juz feel so blessed thou i duno till when the day will comes and i can say that we are truly meant for each other but .. one ting for sure, i m cherishing every bits and pieces tt we are hafin riite nw .. riite nw, i juz wish tt all the unspoken doubts and all the unsettled stuffs btw us can be settled soon .. u haf me more den juz memories went cineleisure after he fetched me up last nite settled our dinner at suki yaki sushi and guess who i saw !!! someone whom i nv tot of bumpin into on the streets, kekeee. i saw ian !! when he sat dw to the table diagonally to ours, initially couldnt recognise him lahh, hahas its like, it has been so long ever since we saw each other and he changed so much, so cool nw. lols, all civil defence de guys verii cool one, like kelvin lidat .. lalala well, after dinner, went shopped around in town but most of the shops are clsing for the day le, so the shops we shopped are limited.make our way dw to ps around 10 plus, went mac eat and nt to forget, went to arcade and played hehee, we try our luck on the giapping machine but we failed !!! and we went and played with the cartoon daytona, duno wat izzit called but its sumting like daytona but the version is cuter =) kanna thrash by himterribly, sobb .. he used his power items to bring me dw .. baldie !!!! yeahh, watched little man. so funny man ^^ i tink we laughed the loudest in the cinema last nite, hahaa its reali worth watching, so cute and funny, and the way the little man is pervertish, reali make us laugh our teeth off and i feel so bad coz i soiled his shirt with the nachos cheese, not one drop but one pool ! hehee, accidentally hit his hand and the whole ting over spilled =( sorrie baldie, dun mean it .. luckily, he nv angry, instead he scold me silly when i keep saying sorrie to him Huggies, sorrie .. okii, within an hour, i used up one box of tissue -.- flu flu go away .. i guess, i reali love workin on sat =) w/o hafing someone to probe in watever u do, its reali shiok but seriously i miss the times tt i used to haf the same shifts as yu hua and xiuhui but its like tis posting, damn fcuk .. haiz, nvm =) muz learn to be adaptable =) anewae working alone on saturdays has surely bring me closer to my staff nurses and guess wat ! tdy igt the chance to remove staples ^^ cool ehh, its much more easier den the spinge tt we had used in sch xD of coz lahh, thats a human body, nt a spinge while removing my verii first staples, my hand reali trembling, kekee coz the staples reali verii close to the pt's skin whoo !!! finally after much hard work, removed sum of the staples but nt all coz i noticed tt the pt's skin is like nt reali healing after e 2nd round of removing .. so i informed my Sn & we did a simple dressing for him with sterile strips =) kill two birds with one stone, signed sum compentency and finally, remover of staples ^^ updating tis riite nw while waiting for kel to reach .. urghh i m damn hungry =( bt guess i wanna wait for him to haf dinner tgt, lidat den taste nicer wat but riite nw, wondering wat to eat .. Nydc, mache, pasta mania, thai express, pepper lunch or sakae sushi? dunoo lahh, its like, nth much new to try out nowadays nahhh, still feel like eating the spaghetti in white wine sauce cooked by him ^^ catching little man @ midnight =) hope its reali tt funny as wat my frds has comment after work tdy, met up with debbie. she acc me go buy movie tickets, kekeke and after she hurried off to meet marcus, i went john little to buy the concealer tt i had in mind - true match actually i dun haf much use with it, juz wanna get it in, mebbe it will comes in handy one day juz like tdy, 2 big red spot jus near my cheeks, sheesh luckily there's sth called concealer in tis world, if nt i reali wonder ugly girls like me how to go out =) nt bad after all, thou reali cant conceal completly bt it reali makes a different ! counting dw to 1930 =) tts when my carriage will arrive xD nahh, its friday but i dun feel its one coz tmr i still need to get my arse out to the ward to work =( haiz, 3 more make up to go excluding tmr ... quick quick, god, pls let e days go by faster and pls ask my beloved pt dun keep pressin call bells for unwanted stuffs its simply irritating and get me on my nerves, esp room 1 and 5 ! urghh, seriously, sumtymes see tis 2 rooms de call bell, i reali feign ignorance -.- i knw i m bad but u dunno how tings will be unless u haf been attending to their call bells nahh, zahira and xiu hui noe best =) suddenly feel like gg watch movie riite nw, or rather get my pipi rite out in town at tis verii moment bt i coudlnt find anyone to acc me, all are working riite nw, tsk tsk ! and hell, y didnt i tink of innyi ? slap myself if i did i guess rite nw i wont be here typing ... sian mann doesnt haf the blogging mood unless u take all my make up away =) tmr is shopping day with him !!!!! fun fun fun as long as he's with me i m getting tis out once again ! fuck off u china peeps ! shut ur fucking arse up b4 u come barking at me for no reason and for fuck, i dun even noe u at all gt the cheek to ask me who m i when u are the one who come msning me !!! fuck off la, china fellows - wat a disgrace to ur own country first comes a china girl who tried to turn my life upside dw and nw comes a bloody fellow who bark non stop like a mad dog - INSANE !!! ya larh, u can bark for all u want but b4 u wanto spend ur effort and bark at me, take my advice - brush up ur english first ! freaking hell STEP INTO GEYLANG AND U WILL SEE 98% OF THE PROSTITUTION IS MADE UP OF UR HOMETOWN anewae we are still the champions ^^ dbbie and me fucked him off till he left the conversation .. kekekeek say liao mahh, wanto bark brush up ur english. placing a dictionary beside u as u type, wont works =) attachement stuffs are full of shit, full of craps and nth but craps and shits first, i m put in the middle of nowhere bt sumwhere surrounded with all malays and nw,i m being put alone on afternoon shift out of the blue and i didnt noe till my frd tell me .. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHh forget it, i take Ian's words .. treat is as she feels i haf good leadership qualities, so give me the opportunity to lead the malays n i m capable enuff to cope by myself =) [ thou i noe tats not the case ] but its juz a way to comfort myself, whahahaahah watever ~ thou i noe i perform great skills in front of u, tts nt the way to repay me by dumping me alone in the damn ward for afternoon shift. haizzz fine, stop complaining .. perhaps its a blessing in disguise ??? lidat i can go whichever break i wanto and i can do tings the way i want =) tdy off work early, okii lah, for 15 minutes only, nt much diff, but the step out of e ward is simply a great sigh of relief nt that my ward is bad or wat, is juz tt u haf finally let go of a burden ^^ counting dw to the days of end of attachement =) another 17 days at work and i can finally called it an end of my clinical practice 2.1 !!! naga, lets jiayou tgt okii .. clear all our mc !!! at least the consoling ting nw is tt, NUH pay is in, whakekekeke i still duno if i shud get the 2 bags tt i want =D shall see how thou, gg shoppng with him tis saturday !!! and is stupid sir is making them to report bk to camp on sat frm 2 to 5 pm .. and i hope he'll realise his stupidlity soon and dun make them go bk, kekeke lidat sat i haf him to fetch me bk !!! happening happening so happening tis is all i ever want =) and big sis, when u makin oh ni bun n oh ni for me to eat (_") i m waiting did u see tis ! tmr will be a nice workin day, no one to fan me while i work =) always look on the birght side, nth is too daunting as long as i haf determintaion ... yeah yeah, i can survive thru all dese crappy stuffs that my beloved lecturer had poured on me ^^ cum to e worse, tmr buy more tibits and stocled up in my pocket =) chew all my times away and i hope tmr baldie wont haf much training so he can peii me, oh, nt to forget i haf innyi too to be dere to lent me her eyes and fingers ^^ i love u yep yep yep u .. the same old u my frds will accept u coz they respect my decision n the same goes for my family one comment : msn so lau pok .. my nose my nose ! wat's happening ? it has been blocked for almost 2 weeks liao .. YES, FOR ALMOST TWO WEEKS wats happening to me tis year ? keep failing sick .. esp fpr the past few months and now i gotta find a time to see a dr for my nose and for a blood test for sum reason .. not HIV lahh, dun be so paranoid and imaginative, kekeke stomach feeling so unwell rite nw feel so crampy, muz be due to all the rubbish i ate tdy : x hotcakes x ice milo x hashbrown x mushroom soup x delifrance x ice coffee x HL chocolate milk x cream crackers x maggi mee with egg and nw, my tummy is like ... crampyyy ! wat for breakfast ltr .. lols mebbe sgh can consider opening a mcdonald for us to haf more choices ! at least kk gt .. life is so happenin riite nw =) raining out dere riite nw pray tt it will stop soon so that ltr when Mr kelvin book in, he doesnt haf any troubles with it =) and it seems tt heaven is crying with my heart and the heart of his "i wanna be with you but i cant" yuan lai, thats the reason tt are stopping him but i reali wanna let him noe, we can overcome all of these for me, its her .. do i need to elaborate more ? its sunday again, tmr is monday again, omg, can god create one more day for us to rest ? maybe can name it --- slpingday ^^ woke up not long ago, but riite nw, i feel like slping again, so tired and sleepy, last nite gt home pretty late =) and the song tt is playing on my blog riite nw, its i wanna be with u its another song of ours =) thou i duno if i can reali say it as "ours" but my heart recognise tis as "ours" first comes canon in d -> jia gei wo -> i wanna be with you n nt to forget : happii birthday to spencer ur day tdy =) enjoy ... 090906 [ saturday ] e beginning of my make up started tdy, nt bad after all i guess keke, yuan lai alone also gt alone de advantage. tagged along with the EN of my team tdy, did alot of tings on my own and i guess, i gt more freedom, kekeke advantage of workin on a sat riite nw is tt i get to complete alot of skills coz no one is snatching w me =P blehz* did alot of skills tdy, signed alot of competency n initial practices tdy I/V, nab administration, off catheter, CLC, off plugs, insulin .. thanks to My EN, she looked out for me and asked me tdy if i wanna do every single of the tings tt is availble in her room, and so nice of her to help me get the SSN sign all the critical skills tt she cant sign =) thanks so much diayana ^^ fianlly i m catching up in my skills, no longer need to aim for skills hopelessly every weekday coz u noe, everyone out dere is so selfish tt they wont look out for u, esp when u are nt the same race with them do i need to say more =) actually didnt wanto go for work tdy but tinking twice, better not, hahaha coz if i dun go i need to fork out another day during my holidays to go bk for make up *nono and wat motivates me most tdy is that, he's fetching me after my work ^^ yeah, hapiii birthday kel .. after work, rushed to polar to get a black forest cake for his birthday .. made him wait for quite awhile tt he said i m verii slow, but he didnt noe tt i brought one for him ^^ he sent me home, and so glad tt he's willing to go up to wait for m. all along he didnt wanto coz he said paiseh my mum was so happii in seeing him and i guess the awkward feeling isnt dere *cLapp after much preparing and after sufficient rest, we set off to town went taka to eat pepper lunch and after tt we had the cake =) actually wanna to haf it at ECp de but its a bit troublesome as we gotta take it here and there n whereever we went after tt we shop around, went see soccerboots with him and after tt decided to go ps arcade for while the photohunt that we used to play its no longer dere =( n there's nth much to play dere so we went off to peninsular plaza to get his boots =) and after tt, its the world of ours, okii, nt gonna say whr we go, hahaha went to ECp ard midnight had supper over dere as our stomachs started to haunt for food le and after tt, made our ways toward the bedok jetty once again =] our favourite place to be on our way dere, there's so many bats flying around on one of the fruits trees ! OMG i was so scared tt i reali screamed .. keke, and lucky he's dere =) and i didnt noe that bats feeds on fruits, keke, i tot they feed on human flesh =x reached dere, listended songs, lied on his lap and feel the breeze that was blowing against us supposed to be cold but deep beneathe me, it was warmth inside, the reason is obvious, do i need to say more ? *happii face happii birthday to u happii birthday to u hapii bdae happi bdae, happii bdae to u =) i was glad tt i got a chance to spend ur bdae with u once again, and i was glad tt u didnt want to spend a yr of ur bdae w/o me =') me too, u noe tt dun u, if not, i wont cancelled the celebrations i had with my frds .. i wanna be with u .. but time is all we need rite nw .. thanks for believin me thou i duno if the trust i reali there riite nw, but i m reali glad tt tings are so swt on tis verii special day of urs and i wanna tell u again my lifetime promises to u is tt : i ll always be here for u =) finally i m hm after my first afternoon shift of the week miss home so much during work, kekee coz pm shift like will miss alot of tings miss my tv show and miss my computer and worse of all, tdy my hp batt was completed flat >.< i can do w/o anyting but nt w.o my hp ! i was like damn sad for the whole evening coz my hp was dead .. yahh, gonna buy a few more battery and charged for standby purpose, kekke .. plan to get another 2 more, so lidat i can haf 4 batteries ^^ i knw its a bit crazy but u nv noe .. my present hp batteries can be more crazy den me, one moment they can be full but the next minute, it will decrease and the next next moment it announce dead =x listen to much mp3 liao, or perhaps too many tings are on in my fone n i keep msging -.- watever, keke. wait till i get my allowance den buy, i still haben pay my hp bills yet *scream work was fun tdy, keke. realised sth and tt is, my SN and EN like to pull me along when they fetch or transfer pt .. i duno why but i haf ran up n dw so many time to fetch my beloved pt ^^ fun lahh and help me pass my time faster also tdy observed how they inserted the CVP line, its like, errr, duno its the doc rough or it suppose to be in tt way e way the CVp line tt was stuffed into the neck was like stuffing dumpline lidat -.- and i hate tt doc who is doing the procedure : simply arrogant cant stand the way he treats the EN and SN tt was assisting him .. bald man Lols, ward 64 staff are so nice and funny joked and talked so much over break time juz nw with them and they told me sth tdy, onions and garlics can make a guy sextually active -.- i didnt noe tt but i told them, oh reali, i love eating those stuffs, muahahah as far as i noe, i only noe tt oyster and musels and vongole can make a guy steam like hell .. opps, okii, enuff of that ^^ ytd chat so much with naga, verii long nv talk to her liao coz she's like so busy w her stuffz she cute lahh, when i update her with all my stuffs and the one i like she actually say tis to me : ohh, i tot u gonna be a nun when u and kel isnt tgt anymore -.- sth lidat lahh, muahaha well, i gaf her tt annoying smiley and somehow tinking bk, i tink wat she said was riite lahh, tts wat i tink so too at tt time. i tot i will nv fall in love with anyone anymore but i was wrong =) my heart is still functioning, juz tt it depends on if i wanna let the past go n move on but somehow i noe, i haben let my love all go sumtings, u cant let go juz bcoz u wanto .. there's so muchh for one to rmb, sumtymes time doesnt fade memories away it juz make them clearer in sum cases. i guess for him too, juz like me, he tot he can juz let the love we had juz past like tis but nope .. he's riite, the stuffs tt we had done n gone thru all these years, is as good as a married couples i dun deny tt trust - a simple word but a complicated stuff can we find the trust back juz like how we used to haf 3 years ago ? i duno but he noes, tt sum of the tings tt he told me i wont even believe, in my shoe, neither do i believe tt he'll believe wat i had said =x complicated isnt it ? hahaha if only love can be more simple and less complicated, but if it is, it wont be love haiz, the tings tt i want now, i dun even dare to go for it =( fear of rejection fear of failure .. perhaps its time to listen the song tt i used to like : Code red - wat good is a heart blehz ^^ well anywae, was glad tt he wanted me to spend his bdae with him rather den agreeing to the one who inititate to spend it with him u shud noe who, its damn bloody obvious, do i need to spell it out !? urghh, watever =) i m off, get my ass to mustafa to buy my breakfast for tmr u knw what, u noe wat !!! my heart is reali into him but somehow i m nt stepping forward, taking bk all my steps coz my heart tells me tt tis dream is unchasable, unreachable (;_;) i guess i reali likes him alot to the extend where riite nw, i m stepping bk coz i fear of rejection and gettin hurt again heart is hurting riite nw, ever since i post tt stupid msg on my msn, i know, i m stopping on my tracks thou i didnt wanto but i know, dreams are dreams, dreams dun come true i m makin myself vanish frm u at the moment .. juz because i noe tts the only way of healing and stopping the pain tt i m experiencing now he'll nv be mine =) nv nv nv nv in my life but only in my dreams tts why i say, dreams are always dreams, dreams doesnt come true alright hahh but at least, the one day memories are dere =) haiz but still, my ting heart is once bleeding --unspoken luv, unchasable dreams, unreachable starz, unnoticable by the one i luv -- work was cool tdy ^^ coz there's so much for me to do shift tdy =) in a split second, work is over ... i wish tt for the rest of my 4 weeks, workload can be as heavy as it can goes so tt time will slip by w.o me noeing =D and guess wat, i enjoyed emptying stoma bag alot, and i wish i can empty everytime and not change diaper .. kekeke at least its nt so strained but it's kinda messy thou ... but !!!! its nt messy when i m the one doing it, *blehz i wish i can see u riite nw coz the smile on ur face always chase my worries away and keep them at bay =) Omg, seriously, my heart keeps melting non stop .. i wishh i can hold u in the hand of mine but i guess drms are always drms drms will nv come true .. __he's my swtdrmz and i guess swtdrmz will nv be fulfill ___ thou i wish it will be (",) hmm yeahh, its true, sumtymes love alone aint Juz enuff, sincerity and courage isnt all it takes its juz tt bit of luck tt we reali needs =) hmm and i guess, its the luck i reali need nw - the luck where i reali hope his heart recognise me =] but .. fairytales are always fairytales i juz woke up from my nap abt an hour ago but i guess i didnt slp at all coz i rmb i was dreaming abt tis fu*king person whom i dowana even tink of u dun even let me off in my dreams !! urghh, to the hell u go =x sorrie if i gota too violent but u will nv understand how i feel urghh,spare me .. i dun need u to be another crayon of mine world coz u dun add beauty to it, u only add flaws to my life ! i m living in denial stage coz every nite b4 i slp and every morning as i force myself to wake up, i'll mutter these few tingz *keke "work is fun, Sn and En will be nice and my pt is cute and i love my job " yeah .. life is interesting bcoz of nursing and thats wat keeps me gg in life LOL he's nt doing tt well in camp too stress as wat he said, from all the hectic traiing that they haf .. that sum of his campmates can reali break into tears and opted for drop out frm the course hey .. dun give up =] u knw u can do it, i now how u feels coz i feel exactly how u are riite nw few weeks back =) nth is too daunting as long as our preservation and determination is dere *jiayou jiayou* poor ting, dun even haf enuff underwear to wear i pray for u okii, tt the wind is super strong tonite and by tmr morning ur ti ku will be as dry as microwave leaves haha i m good girl nw .. trying hard to fill my stomach so i will feel energetic in ward xD u knw what i eat for breakfast ? 1 cup of milo, either 2 slices of bread or 1 packet of buscuits and another one packet of milk .. keke, can last my hunger till 930 or ten lidat =) trying to stuff all that i can find in my house but dun seem to be getting enuff i love u yes i do, i'll be with u as long as u want me to, until the end of time =) my instincts tells me tt u will nv be mine so dw here, i stop hoping xD the higher u climb, the harder u fall .. but as long as one day we are still talking and laughing away, i'll smile too =) u bring me sunnies days i juz woke up from my nap abt an hour ago but i guess i didnt slp at all coz i rmb i was dreaming abt tis fu*king person whom i dowana even tink of u dun even let me off in my dreams !! urghh, to the hell u go =x sorrie if i gota too violent but u will nv understand how i feel urghh,spare me .. i dun need u to be another crayon of mine world coz u dun add beauty to it, u only add flaws to my life ! i m living in denial stage coz every nite b4 i slp and every morning as i force myself to wake up, i'll mutter these few tingz *keke "work is fun, Sn and En will be nice and my pt is cute and i love my job " yeah .. life is interesting bcoz of nursing and thats wat keeps me gg in life LOL he's nt doing tt well in camp too stress as wat he said, from all the hectic traiing that they haf .. that sum of his campmates can reali break into tears and opted for drop out frm the course hey .. dun give up =] u knw u can do it, i now how u feels coz i feel exactly how u are riite nw few weeks back =) nth is too daunting as long as our preservation and determination is dere *jiayou jiayou* poor ting, dun even haf enuff underwear to wear i pray for u okii, tt the wind is super strong tonite and by tmr morning ur ti ku will be as dry as microwave leaves haha i m good girl nw .. trying hard to fill my stomach so i will feel energetic in ward xD u knw what i eat for breakfast ? 1 cup of milo, either 2 slices of bread or 1 packet of buscuits and another one packet of milk .. keke, can last my hunger till 930 or ten lidat =) trying to stuff all that i can find in my house but dun seem to be getting enuff i love u yes i do, i'll be with u as long as u want me to, until the end of time =) my instincts tells me tt u will nv be mine so dw here, i stop hoping xD the higher u climb, the harder u fall .. but as long as one day we are still talking and laughing away, i'll smile too =) u bring me sunnies days nahh ... sumtings i juz dowana noe ... when my heart still hurts, i noe i still mind =] but i dowana mind so do wat u all want she overlapped all the memories that ihad with u, even the most precious one wat else can i say ? wat more can my heart feels ? loneiness and numbness tt's all is left tts wat left after all the accumulation of the tingz tt u both had done and wat she had done to caused such a big impact on my life fuck off u bitch, reali, fuck off .. ur face reali irks my mind and pollutes my computer so stop wat u r doing and scram bk to ur CHINA yes, all because of u, i condemned all pple frm china, esp the girls too bad den, who ask u, to mess up my life and turned it upside dw =) u cant return my baby to me neither can u return my life to me =) but the only ting i can thanks u is with all my fucking blessing tt i hope will fall on u till date, till date u still haunts my world get ur fuckin face out of my precious screen and stop viewing me like as thou i m ur precious, i m nt and hell no do i wanna be ohh manz, i miss the nites out at esplanade with my frds =) the tings and talks we had over dere, nahh, actually wat i miss most is hafing him by my side to talk to me =D sippin his soya milk dirnk n i dig into my milo ice cream =) and admiring his beautiful smiles tt melt me on the spot deep within the cavity of my heart *keke but too bad ... he's nt mine and i guess will nv be nvm =) its okii .. loving someone doesnt means u gotta to be with them my nose has been blocked since sunday afternoon !!! and till nw, it is still blocked =( god damn bloody nasal hole .. nt even a bit of mucous and yet it is blocked suctioning needed, lols .. tts wat swtdrmz said *keke .. suck with a straw -.- 2nd day at work, slowly familiarised with the settings of the ward, nt bad after all lahhh thou sumtymes i feel tt we are playing hide n seek in the ward .. kekeke but seriously, riite nw i m damn fed up with the NYP year 1 .. hello, u are dere for ur clinical practise so kindly lay ur fingers on the tingz tt u are suppose to do instead of feighing ignorance like an eediot fed up with u lahh, damn pissed .. see pt poo on the bed, stood there and shout " eee, i dowan do tt" and walked away and u got the cheeks to tell me tt u are loyal to nursing and for sure u wanna be a nurse. hello, start to learn how to walk b4 u start to run, if nt u better watch out for fracture in that arms of urs =x ur own pt BO u also cant bear to lay ur finger to change, wait till pple screen and don gloves den u start coming in, wat is tis man ? call urself a nurse THAT EXPLAINS THE SIZE U ARE IN *hurrrr snake on the plane is nice =) watched it on sunday with hIm [z] at least the storyline is dere and it is nt as disgusting as slitter and nt as bored as that okii, 4.5 popcorns for snakes on the planes =D and riite nw, i m craving for nachos, tako balls and honey red tea !!!! its juz my fantasy =) jolly well noe deep in my heart tt he will nv lay my eyes on me =] but still, i m happii ... kekekeke crazy little me |