My Pop Pop, with McKinzi, Lake and Tucker, and myself.

Last week, the kids and I dropped everything and drove 16+ hours to Franklin, PA with my parents in two different cars to assist with my grandfather, Pop Pop’s, future.

He was by the court system in April for observation after it was determined that he may not be able to care for himself any longer. The courts had to get involved because my grandfather is an extremely private, stubborn and independent man who does not believe he needs a guardian.

A week ago today, there was another hearing to determine his future. The hospital had determined officially that he has dementia (something I’ve thought all along) and that it will only progress worse. This diagnosis joins a host of other medical issues he has. In the end, it was determined that his three children (my dad and his two sisters) would be his guardians and that he would move to Kansas and live with my parents. This was not taken well by my Pop Pop, initially.

So, a week later, we’ve survived the three days of cleaning up his life in Pennsylvania, driving two days to Kansas and the first two days of his new season here. Our new season.

And so far so good, I am pleased to report.

My grandfather’s condition had often times led to him being verbally abusive, non-trusting and even paranoid of people, my father in particular. During our first sit-down visit with him, things got a little heated. McKinzi was there to hear everything. Later that night, I took her aside and let her know that if she had any questions about anything that happened, to just let me know. She said she didn’t have any questions, but that she did have some things to say. In a nutshell, her little eight-year old mind was so observant and perceptive. She grabbed onto, in those few minutes, so easily the issues that have been plaguing our family and extended family in the seven years since my grandmother passed. I was amazed at how grown up my little girl seemed in those few moments.

I was awestruck when at the end she asked to pray for my grandfather and my father and his sisters. I was dumbstruck when she asked to lead the prayer. So standing there in the lobby of a tiny family restaurant, me and my big girl knelt on our knees and I heard one of the most beautiful prayers ever uttered. Beautiful not because of the eloquence of the words, but because my daughter saw a moment, saw people who needed no other than God’s help and she went on her knees to the only One who can do the healing.

I prayed a lot on the drive out to Pennsylvania. I did a lot of praying during our visitation with my grandfather. I prayed even more while the hearing was occurring and I couldn’t stop praying once it was determined he was going to come home to Kansas.  But I think it was the prayers of one little eight-year old that was heard the most.

Because so far, there has been some healing. There is still obviously a long road to go, new routines to work out, a new normal for everyone, and of course my grandfather will likely not get better. But things are going far better than I believe anyone anticipated, and I have to include myself.

My grandfather is certainly enjoying being around the kids. I can’t wait for him to meet my nieces Ella and Anna and to meet my nephew Jake who is due next month. To be around such happiness surely has to be breathing new life into him. The girls were so excited he was moving back here with us that they wrote him letters and cards and have been so good about helping him move around. Tucker can’t stop saying Pop Pop as though he’s known him all his life.

I know the last seven days can’t erase all of the hurt of the last seven years nor can it dim the memory of the last sixty years. Us grandkids have great memories of our grandfather.  But we have come to learn over the last few years that we were shielded from a lot of the not-so-nice things, as well. But I’m praying that for the rest of the time we’re granted to spend with Pop Pop, our opportunity to build some new, better memories will exceed our highest expectations. Because God can do anything, and I was reminded about that this week by McKinzi.

This is our Toadie. Well, a partially done Toadie. (Don’t know what a Toadie is? Here’s Disney’s version.

This week, Lake starts her third stage production at Trilogy Cultural Arts. This time it’s Sleeping Beauty. Essentially, a Toadie is a dumb bad guy, the ones who follow the villainous Malificent around and who are, well, rather dumb. Evil, but dumb. She also was a very important squirrel in The Chronicles of Narnia and an adorable townsperson in Beauty and the Beast. She’ll also be a Munchkin in The Wizard of Oz in May (along with her daddy, who will be the Cowardly Lion).

So Saturday, we spent some time at Trilogy learning how to do the makeup for her Toadie. We only did half the face, but you get the idea.

Friday was the start of a crazy week for Lake and the Sowles family. She had Sleeping Beauty rehearsal for three hours Friday night, had the makeup session Saturday morning, three hours of Wizard rehearsals Saturday afternoon and another three hours of Sleeping Beauty Saturday night. Mark’s been at Trilogy ever since church ended this morning helping complete sets and then Lake was back at rehearsals at 4 until 9:30 tonight. She’ll be back there Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday for rehearsals from 4 to 930 and then shows start Thursday night, two on Friday and three on Saturday.

In the middle of all this, we’ve still got our normal schedule going on. McKinzi has gymnastics, I’ll have signings, McKinzi has Brownies and of course there’s Tucker, who isn’t exactly the most easy child anymore. He’s already begun the terrible twos and his second birthday isn’t for another few weeks!

I know this all seems crazy sometimes, and I know I complain sometimes about the hectic part of this, but the truth is, I love doing something for my kids that they enjoy. Lake absolutely LOVES the theater. She actually backed out of a Father/Daughter date dance because she didn’t want to miss rehearsal. She’s had the opportunity to leave early a few times because her character was no longer needed and she begged to stay. She turned down the chance to do Donuts with Dad at her school this week because she didn’t want to be late for a show.

Yes, she’ll be tired each morning. Yes, the attitude will be a little on the unacceptable side because of the lack of sleep. And I’ve been through this a few times now. I know what to expect, so I’m prepared and we’ll head off that sleep deprivation every chance we get.

But she is learning valuable lessons that she really needs to learn. She is learning responsibility. She is learning about preparation. She is learning about teamwork. She is learning that sometimes doing what we love means sacrificing other things. She is learning that her family will support her. She is learning that the world doesn’t revolve around her. She is learning that theater is a way to share God’s story. And I love Trilogy. It’s a Christian environment, with Christian leaders. Most of the other kids are Christian as well, and the way the older kids help lead and mentor the younger ones is priceless. I couldn’t have asked for a better organization for her to be a part of.

I love watching her interact with her theater friends, but more than that, I love watching her explain what theater is to her non-theater friends. We picked up McKinzi from a sleepover Saturday morning after the makeup session, make up still on and all. Some of the kids didn’t know what to think, and they asked her why she was doing that. She was so kind, explaining what a play is and why she does it and how fun it is, then she let everyone try on her snout. When one little boy sniffed it then threw it, she politely explained how that was rude and that costumes should be respected … (a lesson she had learned herself an hour ago when she tossed her snout across the room!)

I thank God for her talent of singing and drama because it makes our life so interesting. I thank God for McKinzi’s talent of gymnastics because she’s so awe-inspiring. I thank God for whatever Tucker’s hidden talent is (I’m hoping for baseball!)

And more than that, I just thank God for whatever talents and skills he blesses us ALL with, each and everyone. We all have our own role to play, and He didn’t design us to be toadies.

This week, we’re taking the a family road trip. It’s not our first as a five-person clan, as we went to Michigan to visit Mark’s grandparents two summers ago when Tucker was just a baby who slept all the time. This, however, will be a longer trip and Tucker is now a rambunctious nearly two-year old. I’m not quite sure how it’s going to go, so your prayers for our sanity are certainly welcome!

Where are we going, you ask? Well, we’re headed back to where it all began. Mark and I met in El Paso, Texas on October 28, 1998. The photo above isn’t the very first picture of us together, but it’s one of the firsts. Look how young my hot hubby looks! So glad he got rid of that cheesy beard though! 

It will be fun to walk down memory lane with my husband, and share with our kiddos a bit of our past. My parents used to do that with us once in a while when we went to visit my grandparents in New York, and I loved hearing the stories. I hope our little ones do, too!

Please pray for me … I had a very traumatic experience in El Paso 13 years ago next month. I don’t know if it’s because I’m going back for the first time in 8 years or what, but I’ve been reliving that experience a lot lately … in my memories and my dreams (or nightmares). I’ve laid it all at God’s feet, knowing that he holds each of us in our hands, and I’ve been praying on Isaiah 43:18-19 the last few days, “Do not call to mind the former things, Or ponder things of the past. Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth; Will you not be aware of it? I will even make a roadway in the wilderness, Rivers in the desert.”

And so I haven’t been dwelling on it, and each day my apprehension grows a little less. I thank God for that. And since we’re going to El Paso, where the desert is everywhere, I can’t wait to see what rivers He has in store for us!