I was going through my site and saw a post from someone that was about “if women knew how much fore play this was, every guy would be caged” or something to that effect.

Which got me thinking of how this started with us. Me admitting my submissive side and needing her to take control. We had launched into this fairly quickly, and seemed to fly right through the meat and potatoes of wearing a cage. Which was of course the foreplay. The teasing, the touching, the absolute desperation to please, I think was overshadowed by the lifestyle.

Although having the perfect cage, being pierced and attached to it, and having it be my default setting is daunting in the sense of denial, I think I may have put too much focus on the equipment. I should have been focusing more on making her want me, to want to tease, to want to touch, and how much fun it is with her in charge. It’s not just about being locked, it’s about seeing her have fun, hearing her playful taunts, feeling her body respond from anticipation.

I would was astounded by her jump in confidence when we explored new things, as she felt comfortable enough with me to try them. Whether it was tying me up and experimenting on touching me while I was not allowed to climax, dishing out punishment, or talking about some of the things that trip my subbie buttons.

I seem to have neglected the very thing that brought us here, which is me wanting her to feel like she is my passion. We have a massage table and I am planning on getting it to be a staple in our lives. I bought some oil, scented wax, and just need to get some space cleaned out to make it logistically easy and convenient to use. I want her to know how much I love pleasing her, how desperate I am for her, and that I wear my greediness for her like a badge and wear it proudly.

So my response to that person’s blog would be, yes the cage and toys are great tools for foreplay, but don’t rely on equipment. You have to put in the effort to make her want to tease, touch, and desire you.

I have been wearing a cage for over 9 years now, and I’m still learning.

It’s been a bit since my last post, I’m still in my custom cage from badassworkroom, it’s still frustratingly perfect, and I don’t see a replacement in my future.

I thought I was done with the major expenses of this lifestyle, and damn it I have certainly not been frugal with devices or keys. In fact her key was a custom built pendant that looks like a plain skeleton key that unscrews to reveal the key. And no that did not break…but the lock that it opened did. Grrrrr

So I’m going back to that custom key maker and sending him the key to an extremely durable stainless steel lock that came with the device. I’m sure he can manipulate that key into a silver pendant that is much easier to use, more pleasant to the eye, and less weight than the previous version. This my friends, should be my last major equipment purchase (barring her losing the key).

On a side note, I do have a purchase to make regarding being locked, but isn’t equipment related. I’m planning on getting tattoo above cage reading “______’s Property” , as well as one on my arm that is a subtle drawing. I would love to get matching tattoos, her with a key and me with a lock, but she said she is over getting them and doesn’t want another.

Romantically speaking, we just had a lovely morning interlude, starting with rubbing and fondling her enough to convince her that sex was a good idea. Then some licking, which sadly had been awhile. The scent and taste immediately sent me reeling into delirium. Funny how your senses can trigger responses so intense. I then got the wand for her to finish herself off while I used my fingers. She came very quickly, and as much as I wanted to be unlocked, to slip inside of her slickness, it wasn’t to be. We frankly didn’t have a lot of time, as I had to get ready for work. Not that I would have needed more than a few seconds, but removing cage, and having to put it back on would have made the morning very hectic.

I’m currently in the process of organizing the house, and setting up the massage table. New wax warmers with lavender cedar scent, along with a similar massage oil will hopefully make pampering her a more common and carefree occurrence.

Maid service has continued, although as stated, I’m concentrating on organizing, moving, and tossing stuff at the moment, so my routine has been a little off. I have a plan for the routine to increase and intensify, once I get the house in an organized state.

Not much of an update, but all is well, locked, and subbie.

Found a little time so going to review my latest cage.

It’s from badassworkroom, it is an open design with bars vertical and horizontal on the cage portion. Total cage length is 25mm from ring to tip, including the gap, and includes enough room for piercing prong.

I will run down all my previous custom devices and faults.

1. Mature metal. Fit fine at first, was a little too roomy, but had to get a new one when I got pierced.
2. Rigid chastity. Was a complete waste as I ordered it much too long.
3. Rigid chastity. Was great, but I eventually shrank a little, and started to pull on my piercing.
4. Badassworkroom. Length was perfect at 28mm from ring to tip, but I ordered the piercing prong to be hollow to allow for easier peeing and leaking. That portion worked great but the hole that made it hollow filled up with flesh. I was growing into the actual hole. This hurt considerably and made the device unwearable.
5. Badassworkroom. Ordered a similar device without the hollow prong, and more of a flat cage. I must have made a mistake with piercing dimensions, because the prong was too close to cage and it pinched.
6. Rigid chastity. I thought I would try them again, ordered a cage as small as they could make which was flat. I did the same thing and must have not gotten the right depth of piercing. It pinched me between cage and prong.
7. Can’t remember the maker. Was a ringless cage, that locked on the tip of penis and attached by piercing. I could not wear this at all as I am too small to have it on me without it stretching me and my piercing.

Which leaves me to my current new cage. I decided to give Badassworkroom another try as rigid chastity took 9 months on the last device. This one was about 4 months.

I will run through the testing and how it did.

1. Comfort, long term wear. A+ Well it can be worn everyday without skin issues or irritation. I did notice when I removed it after a few weeks that I had some bar marks like a tic tac toe board, but nothing serious . It’s basically flat, but fits nicely.
2. Erection prevention. A+ Using my imagination, or watching porn, nothing happened. It attempts it but the cage doesn’t allow for any growth inside the cage or behind the ring. It simply just can’t happen.
3. Vibration test. A+. No matter what the setting on the wand, any vibration is very painful. Unlike other cages where it was painful but I could still tough it out long enough to cum if I really wanted to spend the 45 minutes it would take, this one hurt too much. No way would I ever attempt it again.
4. Exposure test. A+. There just isn’t enough exposed skin in any of the right places to touch anything of note.
5. Cage jerk test. A+. If a cage is loose enough, you can stroke yourself by using cage as a sleeve and the friction. This one has no friction, no movement.
6. Shower head test. A+. Tried every angle, but the spots that could lead to orgasm just can’t get the stream of water to hit.

A+ all around. Can wear indefinitely and open enough to keep clean without removing. Erections and orgasms are impossible. It does not damage piercing or skin, and I can’t find a single flaw.

It’s kinda scary having a cage that won’t have any reasons to remove, or one that I can’t beat the system and use the wand to cum.

So unless something weird happens, this will be my forever cage. I certainly can’t get any smaller, so I won’t need to replace it from needing a new size.

This is a continuation of today’s earlier post where I mentioned having a dream that must have been inspired by her text. It’s also safe to say that it also follows closely with my fantasies so it could be just my own self induced imagination.

We are in bed morning time, I’m stirring and about to get up. She says good morning and I kiss her on the back of the neck, and she slides the covers off her, lifts up her naked bottom and simply says “lick”. I get behind her and dive in, trying to maneuver my mouth into a position to lick her pussy. She said plainly and firmly “no, not there” and tucked her knees further underneath her and arched her back slightly. There was no doubt as to where she wanted me to worship.

I felt the rush of excitement from being both told what to do, and doing what I was told. The minute I began I was lost in the moment, lost in my service, my tongue licking and probing her bottom and all the nerve endings that must be sending so many sensations to her.

When she was done she rolled over and said “if you want to be my submissive and really do this, we’re doing this all the way, you’re going to serve, things will change and there’s no going back” I collapsed on her chest and begged her to continue and that I wanted to serve. “Ok then, rule one, you will worship me like that every morning unless told”

Then we were instantly up and out of bed, in the kitchen and I was making coffee. She said “you remember when you dressed up for me, makeup and everything to serve me? You served me supper, bathed me, washed my hair? I was never so turned on” (this was an actual real quote she told me once, so I know where that came from) “You will start doing that again when it’s just us home, it doesn’t have to be that formal but I loved how sincere and doting you were while humbled and serving as my maid.“

The next part doesn’t really mesh from where we were in the kitchen, but next I was trying to get her to unlock me for sex. She was rubbing my cage on her pussy lips, the slickness and heat the only sensations I could feel, and told me that “this wasn’t built for fucking, from now on when you want to fuck, I’ll be doing it to you. Just tell me when you are clean and ready down there and I’ll let you beg me to fuck you with the harness”. I think I was still trying to convince her when she said “when I want that from you I’ll tell you to wear the harness.” And again I must have collapsed on her chest grinding into her, trying to feel through my cage.

She stroked my head as I was panting from my excitement, she was almost apologetic but firm saying “you wanted me to be in control and now I am. When I get home from work I want your unconditional attention and devotion. When I sit down you will worship my feet, you’re all mine and once you are done tasting and inhaling them, you will rub them with lotion before continuing your maid service.” She then asked me “are you sure you want me to be dominant? Once we start down this path I don’t think I could just change back, you can still quit right now and we will forget all about it.” I said something like I wanted to be hers forever and that nothing would make me happier and was begging to serve her .

That’s the end of it really, although I think there was more detail that I can’t quite get the order of so skipped.

The gist of it was that she responded to my self unlocking with an all out directive. As stated above, I’ve had similar fantasies before, but due to the proximity to her text I had to do a double take the next morning to remember for sure if I had certain responsibilities that morning or not hahaha.

So, let’s pick this apart a little. It’s not practical in the slightest for me to get all gussied up 3 days a week. One it takes time, those clothes aren’t practical for some activities, and it would restrict my movement to inside. Could that be a planned event or scheduled occurrence, sure. But doing that every day seems more like something that would quickly become a hassle for us both, even if both of us were enjoying it.

Her using the harness on me, she certainly could and I’ve certainly been horny enough to beg her to do that (I haven’t begged her). But it’s an activity that requires quite a bit of effort on her part. I suppose I could mitigate some of the effort by me riding her as she lies down, but still it’s not an activity that is really doing anything for her but feeling the power of being the one penetrating, being inside, being in complete control while they are completely vulnerable. Making it a clean and fun experience requires heads up so I can be clean and have no yucky residue with the fun. And anything you need to plan ahead for is less likely to happen.

About the only things that were realistic routines were the worshipping. Both feet and bottom requires little to no effort from her, is readily available regardless of condition, and has a daily time that is easy to stick to.

Dreams or fantasies for that matter don’t have to be based in reality , but I can say that I woke up excited, nervous, and a bit damp from the excitement of it all hitting me.

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An update from my last post when I didn’t lock back up.

Let’s start off by saying that although I didn’t say anything mean or untrue in my last post, my wife took it as a personal attack as a wife and lover. It certainly wasn’t meant to be. It was just how things were, and how things have changed with our lifestyle. If you look back at our posts here, you can see that we went from unlocking and relocking, teasing, rubdowns, ruined orgasms, toys, discipline, dirty talking, the whole 9yards to just occasionally letting me out to cum. The lifestyle we had built around the cage had disappeared with the cage the only thing left. It wasn’t an accusation or insult, it just is what it has become. I was only making a stand on continuing on as if nothing has changed.

She texted she expected dinner to be made and a foot rub when she got home from work, no request but a demand. I replied with a yes maam and thought that she might be trying to get back into it. The next day we were fooling around and she started some dirty talking, which gets me leaking like crazy and asked if I wanted to try from behind. This I love to do. I can’t reach from behind because I’m too small, and the more time I take to attempt to enter her, the more embarrassing it is which trips my trigger. Fumbling back there pointing it at the general location, feeling her with my fingers, then pressing against her in a futile attempt to slip inside of her. It Raises my temperature, flush with embarrassment and slight humiliation. After I can take no more of her being so near yet so far away, I pressed her to roll over for missionary. I slid all that I could into her and she told me she wanted me to wear my cage again. I asked if she was sure and she was. I finished, not a mind blowing orgasm as I had been doing that regularly myself since being unlocked, and wasn’t asked to lick her after or anything. Yes I did miss having the toe curling, foreplay, time induced orgasms that came from our lifestyle.

So with her wanting me to lock back up, and doing some of the things that push my buttons, I’m guessing she is on board with resuming her dominant role as my keyholder. I locked back up and left her necklace out for her to wear again.

Coincidentally I had a dream later that I had to double take if was real or not, probably inspired by her text and resuming her being in charge of the cage again. I don’t have time to post right now about it, but will in my next post.

So we are having another go at it, and hopefully we will communicate better about things before they become issues again, and feelings get hurt. Glad she wants to start this again and glad I’m locked up waiting for her.

Well we have hit a patch of shall we say indifference in our roles. That being said, I didn’t lock up after my last use.

The reason why the cage was something I wanted was that it would ensure that whatever activity there was, it was based on her wanting that activity. Another reason is that I’m very sexually submissive and being teased, tortured, humiliated, controlled and feminine with her is a huge turn on. I also know I am a better partner when submissive, serving, and having my limits pushed.

She asked me why I hadn’t locked back up, and just responded that it didn’t seem like she was participating, and it’s not something you can set it and forget it. She didn’t have much to add so that was that.

Part of our original commandments was letting her know when I wasn’t feeling subbie, With no teasing, touching, rules, play time, toys, dirty talk, all the stuff we have slowly drifted away from…locking up is merely symbolic. Instead of being enthralled I’m just frustrated…not the same outcome or what makes this worth giving up erections, orgasms, and physical contact.

So not sure where we will go from here. I did plan on wearing this for us forever. I loved how into this we once were, how it made us better and special. I loved seeing her key hanging around her neck on her shirt, no one knowing that actually was a real key unlocking something only we shared. Wearing a cage without input or participation however can lead to an even worse attitude than what I was trying to avoid, so counter productive.

On the plus side, I have put in my ring to keep piercing from shrinking, and is fun to have jewelry on. Also, I have been having tons of orgasms, and enjoying the feeling of it being hard and touched again, even if it’s just me.

On a side note, I found the style, size, and material of our first toy Johnson online and bought it a month ago. I haven’t had the opportunity to use it on her yet, and not sure if I will if I’m not locked and not using harness. I did find the elusive toy though, so jumped on it when I could. It’s even a bit better as it isn’t using the vaculock insert which was a bit of a hassle. This one had a name on the package which I found even better than “Johnson”, it’s called “the D” which I found even better.

Anyway, I will update if something changes, but until then I’m running free.

An update containing little, nothing really new happening on our horizon.

Still a locked submissive. On Thursday and Fridays I still put on a maid uniform, clean the house and do various chores. Still try to make her feel like a princess.

I am planning on doing a bit of simplifying soon. Certain toys just aren’t going to be used and need to be placed a bit further back in the drawer, and those we use or should use can get easier access for action as needed. Particularly the harness and dildo. I have replaced the one I had on it which was quite large and not very soft, with a medium sized one from vixskin which is soft on the surface and firm in the middle. I’m hoping to have it right there at the ready and easy to slip on.

I love the options in positions, the feeling of giving longer strokes, the sound of her pleasure when she loses her inhibitions. Insertable toys tend to make her feel self conscious. It doesn’t feel like the real thing, but that is my fault. Toy choice was not good. The first toy we had was perfect and she loved it, but it wasn’t harness compatible and was later a casualty of being a dog toy. I tried finding one similar but have failed miserably. Hopefully this one is what the doctor ordered, if not I’ll find the one we had and get that again.

As far as toys on me, I haven’t really been trying them. I haven’t worn any plugs for awhile, or used the steel wand. I did purchase a sex machine, much cheaper than the last one, but haven’t even used it yet.

I did have a pretty good sex dream, it wasn’t complete enough to really write about, but it was enough for me to think on later and think I might write a short erotic story based on it. I might try to make chapters in this one. Many times when I’ve written stories, I smash everything together, and it ends up being too much at once. If I select different aspects spread out over different chapters, it will be easier to string together a storyline.

I’ve noticed I can read erotic stories for hours, stuck in my cage being unable to do anything about it, aching, leaking, and desperate for relief. Though finding stories that I enjoy is sometimes daunting. I prefer stories that are reality based, could happen, something I want to happen, or something that I would think about happening. Many stories if not all, in my particular kinks, are written by men. They lack the emotion and feeling of the experience and focus too much on the acts themselves. I like being descriptive, but some of the writing I see is just crude. It ruins the fantasy of it being real, which then ruins my fantasy.

Will post the story here when I write it, or maybe I’ll post it on literotica and provide a link. I haven’t looked at the logistics of that yet, but it can’t be too difficult, I’ve read some really terrible stuff and if they can post I’m sure I could.

Anyway, all is well, we are trucking along, still in love with my beautiful Mistress Amante.

This is more posts than I usually write in such a short period, but life is dynamic and constantly moving, but not always in a consistent manner.

So to sum up, she has read my blog posts and has agreed to get back on track. In regard to withdrawing from cage life, her reply was “for the record, your cage isn’t going anywhere”. So that answers that. Which is somewhat of a relief. One, I have a better fitting cage on the way due in October. Two, I have acquired a lot of key/lock type of paraphernalia that wouldn’t fit in a non cage lifestyle. Three, we certainly have a lot of paddles, and maid dresses that would be a waste lol.

Four, and most importantly, I wouldn’t know what I’d do with free range penis access. I’ve been unlocked without her direct supervision before, but I usually held out from playing around with it in hopes of her wanting to fool around again before the next lock up. I don’t know what kind of person I would revert to once my subbie side went dormant.

I am not sure exactly what getting back on track entails since we’ve had so many levels of our lifestyle at different times. Just knowing it’s important to her as much as me to commit to it with participation has reassured me so much.

I have some supplies that I would like to make more of a regular use out of, massage table for example. I also recently purchased some items that will assist in my pampering and pleasing efforts. New bubble bath and bath salts, lotion for her feet (although I much prefer to worship them with my mouth lol). I even did some research on a penis sleeve, she feels most toys aren’t realistic feeling, but vixskin material is supposed to be very lifelike, and this one is not huge or oversized. I will have to be unlocked to use it however. I hope we both enjoy it. It was fairly expensive, but she is totally with it.

As far as service goes, I have all day Thursdays and Fridays for the maid to get the work done, and still have the nights open to whatever she has in mind.

I am looking forward to worshiping her delicious pussy, bottom, and feet. Pampering her, following her lead and instructions, sounds like heaven to me.

Unlike my last post that was directly aimed at my keyholder/wife, this post is more of a general update post. The last post oddly enough may not have been read by her, as she was busy and might have skipped it after her notification. I sometimes ramble on here about erotic dreams or fantasies, so her not checking it out is understandable.

No this post is an update on what I’m setting out to accomplish in the future that is ahead of us. You see, the nest has recently become empty. This hit a bit harder than I had thought it would. Being a dad was something I had always wanted, had always loved, and what was my number one priority for the last 18 years. I know his independence doesn’t end me being a father, but it does end my current role. I am now strictly support. Wisdom, finance, and help can be doled out, but his actions and decisions will be what determines his well being.

I mourn the loss of what was, and the identity that I had felt so comfortable in. Within the loss however, is pride. I’m proud of the person that is just starting their independent life, and proud of all the work and love that it took to make that possible.

As the title suggests, moving forward will come with change, and much of which will be dependent on my wife/keyholders feelings on continuing our dynamic in a more steady manner as described in my last post.

If she wishes to ditch the whole keyholder, service oriented ownership role, well the first thing to change would obviously be the removal of the cage. My rather large assortment of maid outfits and uniforms would be put away, and who knows, maybe wear my piercing rings that I usually never wear because of the cage. I don’t expect my behavior to change much, but who knows. This is the only successful relationship I’ve ever had, and it’s always been based on our dynamic. I don’t think I would instantly become an asshole, but I can’t imagine I would be totally the same either. We love each other so we as a couple would be fine, but probably different.

Another change would be my weight hopefully. I’m going to make a real effort to eat less, and exercise more, and lose some weight. With me only cooking for ourselves, it should be easy enough to meal plan around making less, and not buying the snacks that I usually just keep in the house. This will also help with the next change.

The next change is money, I’m going to start saving it. I’m not going to go without, but I waste a lot of money gambling and misc things that could be averted. I make decent money, and it’s time I quit acting like it will burn a hole in my pocket.

If she wishes to continue an active role in our dynamic as keyholder, well the cage wouldn’t disappear. With the nest being empty, it will allow me to be more active in my service to her and the house. A serious and comprehensive overhaul of my dedication and her pampering. With her being more active in this department I of course would be more engaged, but would be more dependent on her. Her decisions on everything may not be what I want in the short term, but would be based on what she thinks is best, and would accept them.

The weight loss and money saving goals will still be on my to do list regardless of her keyholder role. I feel like crap much of the time, and although I know I’m getting older, I know much of it has to do with my weight and money anxiety. So change is happening no matter what, much of it however will be dependent on our desire to continue our dynamic in a more engaging way, or pulling the plug on it. Losing weight and saving money will happen though. Either way we go, I am looking forward to the new life we are going to enjoy together.