God is in the details

HELLO from Minnesota! We are HOME! We received the call for the interstate compact on Tuesday afternoon, while we were visiting the Billy Graham Library. We were able to get a flight out early Christmas morning. We were home for Christmas!!!

Kayin is doing wonderfully and is such a joy. We just introduced him to Buster (our dog) and that went really well. Not that I was worried about it. Mia is still in total awe of Kayin. She sings to him, talks to him, and helps me in anyway that I let her. :)

Anyhow, we are out to Target to get some diapers and odd'n ends. Pictures soon!

Thank you, Hubby.

My wonderful hubby updated our blog with photos. Thank goodness. :) On Thursday night (same day we had placement) I started vomiting. Pretty much lasted until 10 the next morning. I was useless. I was going to try and induce lactation to nurse the baby, but needless to say that did not happen.

We are all doing wonderful. He's doing great, though last night had some gas problems - I think we've got that taken care of. It's been a whole new experience with bottles and formula, but it's not too bad. I will be nice not to have to worry about feeling the urge to explode and cannot get to a private place to nurse. Especially since we are not home and being at the airports for a while on our return flights.

Thank you all so much for your comments and prayers. Please continue to pray about our Interstate Compact. No news yet, and we are hoping to receive some word on Monday. In the meantime we are soaking up the 60 degree weather and sunshine. (jealous?) It has been a nice break from the blizzard North.

Your prayers are coveted, and your comments have blessed us beyond belief. May the Lord bless you all for blessing us.

Our New Addition

Sorry for the delay in getting the pictures up we were a little sick last night. So here are some we have so far:

We are here

We are finally here! After two delayed flights, and no naps. We are finally at the hotel. It has been a long day. We get to meet our little man tomorrow morning. We can all hardly stand the wait! His name is Kayin (Kay-en) which means : Long expected, long hoped for child.

This is the best Christmas present ever! :)

Please pray that our inter-state compact paperwork gets completed before Christmas, so that we can be home for Christmas. But we are totally at peace if God chooses to have us here longer. Blessings to all, and look for photos soon... very soon!

IT'S A BOY!!!!!

Here's the short of it:

Kevin came home for lunch, with a bouquet of flowers and a card. He said, "Open the card first." So I did, and it said, "Congratulations it's a boy!" I said, "What's is this supposed to mean?" He got all teary eyed, and YES my friends I started crying!!!!

Our little boy was born yesterday, and weighs 7lbs. 12oz. and we are flying out tomorrow to go get him!!! I haven't been able to think straight all day. :)

PRAISE THE LORD!!! Please pray for the Birth Mom, who is going through so much right now, and needs the peace of the Lord. Please pray for her.

Cannot help but giggle

Patience (ˈpā-shənz) is the state of endurance under difficult circumstances, which can mean persevering in the face of delay or provocation without becoming annoyed or upset; or exhibiting forbearance when under strain, especially when faced with longer-term difficulties. It is also used to refer to the character trait of being steadfast.

We have been matched since before Thanksgiving with a Birth Mom, (that at the time our workers said that she could deliver at any time, this being her 5th pregnancy) who's due date WAS December 6th.

Ha.Ha.

Last time I looked, today was December 15th, and she is STILL pregnant. For the love of Pete Rose, come out kid. I know that she's probably thinking the same thing right now.

"Lord, even if this Mother decides to keep this baby, and you choose to make us wait again - let her go into labor tonight. Put her out of her misery. We will praise you either way."

It's pretty comical. *grin*

Oh Tyler

We have the GREAT friend, named Tyler, who we love to hang out with. He is always up for doing or eating something different. We were at Perkins with some friends Saturday night after church, and well...

That'll Work

A couple of nights ago we were discussing with our daughter the (very likely) possibility of her getting a younger sibling that has dark skin. She didn't understand that nor want that, because she wanted a sibling that looks like her. It's understandable, but I wanted to open her mind to what God has in mind for our family, and for our Heavenly family. The "lecture" didn't accomplish much in her mind. So as I was laying in bed that night the Lord gave me an idea that I thought would work great with her. Feel free to use it in your family, or other children dealing with the concept of "different" skin tones.

The hubby picked up a package of chocolate chips and a package of white chocolate chips. So we made "Inter-racial Cookies" together. I laid out one "light" and one "dark", and had her eat one at a time. We talked about them tasting different from each other, but still both being good and sweet. Then I went on to tell her about how all "dark" chip cookies are really good and all "light" chip cookies are really good, too. Then I laid out the chips again, and had her eat them together. We talked about how good they tasted together, and how great the cookies would be if both of them were in them.

Then we started making the cookies. I proceeded to tell her about how she, Daddy and I are like the "light" chips, and the baby we will get will be like a "dark" chip. Knowing that the "light" and "dark" chips taste good together, wouldn't the "light" and "dark" people make a good family together? She enthusiastically agreed. I talked to her about adding even more "dark" chips to our "light" family. So then I told her that though our outsides look different, our insides look all the same, and IF we believe in Jesus as our Savior, when we get to Heaven our spiritual family will all look different on the outside. BUT our hearts will all be exactly the same, because Christ would have given us a NEW heart that looks just like HIS!

Then we finished mixing the cookie dough, and then tasted it. It was GOOD! And I told her, "Just like these 'light' and 'dark' chips are held together by cookie dough, the 'light' and 'dark' members of our family will be held together by love for one another and love for Jesus."

Friends... I think she got it! She was able to grasp it much better than the conversation about it. So we're having milk and cookies for dessert tonight!

That

Happy Thanksgiving!

I saw this on GirlTalk and thought it was really funny. We don't have a television so it's more than likely on there, but I cracked up, and could totally see myself doing something like this. Which is why I don't cook the turkey! (Thanks Honey for doing that for me. I love you)




Have a wonderful and thankful day!

That time again

You know it's getting cold when just, from the door of the church to the end of the entryway, (where my precious hubby picks me up) my lips are chapped and splitting. OUCH they hurt! :) I know it's getting close to the holidays, because it's so stink'n cold outside. I'm still so stubborn though that I rarely wear a coat out.

A huge sigh of relief came when I pressed the "place order" button for all the nieces and nephews Christmas gifts today. They are ordered and will arrive before or right after Thanksgiving! Yee Haw! A goal was met. All the kids finished before Thanksgiving. And I don't have to wrap them (sorry MiMi and Aunt Tori you guys have to *blush*) and that was a bonus. Now I have to think about the more difficult ones. The grown ups and my husband. He's kinda picky, kinda hard to buy for, but I love him anyways.

We're still waiting on the adoption... obviously, or you would see in all caps the news of us getting a baby. *sigh* It will come, sooner or later. As of late, it seems more like later. :) God is good, faithful and true - and I count on Him for strength to wait another day. As I wait, I'll trust, read and sip some awesome tea my husband just brewed for me. THANKS HONEY!

Funny kid.

I love being a Mom, though there are days when all creativity and patience have left me, all in all I would not change my job. My precious daughter makes me laugh so much, and just about as much as her Dad makes me laugh. They are both so random and really funny.

So here is a cute story...

I was pretending to be asleep/dead on Saturday morning. I though surely she would start crying once I never flinched or anything. For sure she would think that I was a "goner". She tries to tickle me, kisses me, licks my head?! Then she said, "Whelp I think she's dead." So as she snickers and giggles, she raises my hand and tries to get my finger into my nose!!! I, of course, bust out laughing, because really, she thought I was dead so she was going to pick my nose?!?!

Here's another one:

On Friday of last week, a friend with her kids and I went to the Mall of America to take the kids to the Under Water Adventure. (Thank goodness we had coupons.) Anyways, in our home we are still struggling (at times) with Missy eating good. But she ate her popcorn shrimp wonderfully, never complained, or ask to buy something (Even while we were in the Disney store!). I was so proud of her. I wanted to go to Disney to check out their costumes, to see if they were on sale. They had an Ariel costume (thankfully a modest one) for 9 bucks so I had to get it. We get home, and of course she wanted to wear it. She then plays, sings and dances for a good 15-20 minutes.

Then she says to me, "Oo, Mom I gotta go potty."

I said, "Fine, go."

She responds, "Um.. I'm a fish. How am I going to go potty with these? (pointing at her fins)"

Laughing I said, "Well, we have a predicament don't we? Just pull it up like a dress. It is a dress you know? It just has pretend fins on the front. You still have legs."

Smiling though puzzled, she says, "Yeah, I knew that. But I don't want to get my fins in the potty water. *Lifts up her dress* I do have legs! Mommy, you're right it is a dress."


GEEZ, the drama! She really thought she was a fish?! Oh dear. I love this girl, who makes our lives seem like we are living in a musical and wonderland one most days. As today, it's horrible weather, icy, dreary - and she says, as we are running to the van from Cub, "Mom, isn't this beautiful? Look at this. *holds mouth agape to catch ice* It taste wonderful." Then she starts to sing about the ice and how wonderful it is. :) Girls.

Happy Reformation Day!

Forget that pagan thing called Halloween, this is something to celebrate! PROTESTANTISM! Thank you Justin Taylor for this: REFORMATION POLKA!

God is

always staining. He has a precious strength and design to make it bearable to get through rough seasons in life. Our hearts are remaining hopeful in this process of adopting, and I can only give credit to the Lord. My heart would be easily shaken, IF I was not grounded to Scripture... daily grounded in God's word.

If you know me well, you know that pretty much I'm an open book. So, as you know, last Wednesday night we received the news about the baby girl going home with her Mother. Thursday was an incredibly hard day. I'll be totally honest, it felt like I miscarried again. Only those who have gone through adoption can grasp that concept. For me, it was a combination of all four losses that pushed me over the edge to tears. (I truly don't cry much.) My Mom will remember this description of how my days looked recovering from the miscarriage in December. This is how I was on Thursday.

I sat on my couch and stared outside, almost all day.

Thursday night, I looked at Kevin and said, "Let's do something outside. Like saw some limbs off of a tree, or something." I deal with problems better if I can tangibly do something. Not like punch a wall or anything, but tackle a task that requires physical labor. He was totally up for it, since that's what guys like to do. We were outside at dusk, he was sawing limbs off of our tree (that needed to be cut) and I was push mowing the front yard. After that, it was over for us.

I thank all of you for your prayers, comments and all those who asked how we were doing on Saturday night. You are a blessing to us... all of us. I know that some of you might think I'm nuts, but I would not trade this time for anything. God has been so good, and I'm so grateful.

On a lighter note

A funny, yet rather embarrassing note.

Yesterday after Bible study, I went downstairs to pick up Miss Drama from the nursery. Mind you, I had my Bible, notebook, coffee mug (still containing coffee), and my purse in my hands. I pick up my little girl and all her "take homes" which included three rather cumbersome papers with fun things glued on them. Does she want to carry them? No, Mom has to. We start up the stairs, and my sweet daughter wants to walk right under my feet.

*side note* I might just be the clumsy-est person I know... SERIOUSLY.

I trip, and SLAM my right lateral meniscus (aka my knee) on the stairs. At that moment my precious daughter yells with hands in the air, "We need help! My Mom just fell on the stairs!". *Annnd insert spot light.* As if I needed more drama and stabs at my pride. Now not only can I NOT get up to walk up the stairs, I'm trying desperately to make my daughter be quiet and not to cry at the same time. So I sat, with on lookers, and children trying to come up the stairs, too. Of course they have to use me as a jungle gym on the way up. Because anytime there is an adult sitting somewhere, there is also a sign that only children can read that says, "Climb on me!".

After two awesome ladies check on me, and my pride is pretty much hurting as much as my knee, I'm able to get up and walk up the stairs. I realize that this is my "bum" knee. One I hurt two years ago on a skiing trip. And I hit my lateral meniscus, which just so happens to be the ligaments that I buckled... what luck!

I make my way home, hobbling in the door with giggles from myself and my husband. I mean really, how possible was it that I smack the same knee, in the exact spot where a previous injury took place?! Stuff like this only happens to me. (still giggling here.) I'm actually not hobbling as much today, except going up and down the stairs in our house. But really, it was rather funny and painful all at the same time.

Struggling Well?

What does struggling well look like? Well, I can say it does NOT mean putting on a "game face" for everyone else when inside you are dying. I know, right now from my own life what it tends to look like:

Taking a good hard look at the facts. Crying over the truth of a circumstance that I cannot change. But filling up, with prayer and Scripture, so all that comes from my mouth is the Truth from God's Word.

We received a call last night saying that the little girl (we were waiting on) had been born two days ago, and the Mother left the hospital with her. It was a hard blow, the fourth blow if you're counting. One - miscarriage in December, Two - loosing Christopher, Three - baby boy a month ago, now Four - baby girl. So again, we face the "waiting on another one" time.

It is extremely hard, and that is an honest fact that I cannot deny. I must push myself to the only peace I know, God's Word. This makes me anchored to power and strength that I, alone do not possess. God knows where I am and what aches I am feeling. That is why in Genesis He is called by Hagar the Egyptian slave, "El Roi" the God who sees.

My wishes remain the same, but I must totally surrender to the Lord's will for this adoption. Yes, I want a child. BUT I only want the child that God wants for me. Joyful, tearful and hopeful I will remain here in this season. God IS faithful and I trust in Him.

I stand on Your promises
I stand on the grace You give
I stand when the darkness falls
Upheld by Your right hand
I stand

Yeeeouch!

I just got my hair done today. The lady who did my hair was sweet, well not sweet smelling, she kind of smelled like an ashtray, but she was super nice. Anyhow, while she was blow drying my hair, using the round brush, she seriously almost broke my neck. She pulled so hard, I was wanting to say, "Ummm, yeah there are nerve endings still attached at the root there, and my hair is still attached to my scalp!" OUCH!

I might have whiplash.

Timely Study

I'm in a Bible Study at church on Wednesday mornings, and it is AMAZING. Not only does our teacher beautifully express her gift of teaching, but God put me in a study concerning Abraham. NOT Abraham Piper, come on. The very first Abraham. :)

What a timely study, concerning where I am in my life. I, too like Abraham and Sarah am waiting on a child. God has promised me this child - through a little different means than their circumstance. I'm not THAT old, and the Messiah won't come through my child, BUT the desire for a child is still there. I struggle like they did in waiting on the Lord, and there are times when the situations seem so cloudy and unknown. I cling to those passages in Genesis, and then again in Galatians, where Paul says, "Abraham's faith was reckoned to him as righteousness." I want to believe well.

Daily I'm going through a study of this man and his faithful God. I thank God that I'm not having to wait 25 years for a child, and that I'm not 90 years old. But I also thank God that He has had me in this season of waiting for a child, while studying about Abraham and Sarah waiting on Isaac.

God said to Abraham and Sarah in Genesis 18, "Is anything to hard for the Lord?" No. And the same is true today in my life. Is everything going to be taken care of with this adoption? YES, because God has called us to adopt a baby. God has and will do more in this time than bring me a beautiful baby. Through this time, He has caused my heart to trust in Him, love His Word and believe that He will deliver. I wouldn't trade this season with my Lord.

He has been faithful to give me pieces of bread (the Word) to sustain me through the loss of our baby in December and through two failed adoptions. I continue in confidence that He is in control of all things. Seeing other's walk through similar situations has brought even more hope.

Thank you Abraham and Molly and Dorthy for being so transparent in your struggles and victories. It has brought me more confidence in the Lord we share!

Thanking God for Busyness

My days are busy, especially since we have started school. We are loving our homeschool time, and it makes our days so much more scheduled and structured which is good. I love watching my daughter learn, and me learning a long with her, espcially finding new ways to engage her, and making learning fun. She really is a precious girl. :)

The biggest blessing of being busy, is that I hardly have time to think about the adoption, and how I'm still waiting. *smile* I thank the Lord for answering my prayers for extra measures of grace. God's ways are not my own, and I'm grateful that He has kept me busy with dance, Bible study, small group and other church activities that I am not focused on myself. I am truly joyful.

Someone once gave me a nugget of gold in this statement: "When you become too self absorbed, self evaluative, and self pitied - offer to cook a meal for someone, host a Bible study at your house, or go help the elderly one day a week. It will get your focus on others and not yourself!" She was right. And I am blessed to have other things in life to focus on rather than empty arms and an empty crib.

"This God, His ways are perfect!" AMEN!

What a Surprise! *Loads of photos*

My parents flew up from Texas to visit this past week. They flew in on Friday afternoon, and were planning on attending the DG conference with us. We had wanted to fly my nephew J in with them to spend sometime with his cousin. They are best friends, and were born 6 weeks apart. They have a really special relationship, never fight and make each other laugh. And since our sweet girl has been missing her family back in Texas we thought this would be the best present we could ever get her. Well, prices for tickets were so expensive that it was not the best decision for us to make, since we are going through an adoption.

We all loaded up on Friday to drive to the airport to pick up my parents. We pulled up, I dropped my hubby off to help them with their bags, and we drove around until they were ready to be picked up. Well, upon pulling up, I see my Mom holding something or someone who appeared to be asleep. IT WAS J!!! We were so excited, and I cried. (I am not a cry-er) We were all so excited!



Here is Spider Man... notice Snow White in his hand. he he

Tinker Bell and Spider Man playing with princesses in the doll house.

Tink.

We decided to go for a little drive, on the bikes. Doesn't J look thrilled?

On the slide.

Sweet friends, that just happen to be cousins.

More princess and doll house fun. (Black mail, for when J is a teenager. mauhahah)

Time to get their ride on.

J the Dragon Rider, Missy on the Zebra, and the Husband was going to ride the cat, but realized that he was too heavy. I tried to talk them into riding the rooster... that's what I would have done.

Bumper Cars! Seriously, they both kept just going in circles. It was hysterical.

They were really high... oh wait. This was my Dad and me on this one. We tried to get them to let us take the kids, but they wouldn't let us *joke*. It was so fun! My Dad's face was priceless on the coaster photo thing.

At Lego Land, building a car. (J stands just like my Dad... he's so much like him it's uncanny)

So he got outta hand one night, and had to be hogged tied. Not really. We were playing and I had to take a photo for my brother. Pretty sure my brother tied me up a few times.

Pops and two of his grandkids. Look at J and how much he looks like my Dad. SERIOUSLY!

Of course, we went apple pick'n. I think we got the last of the Honey Crisp. Man, those things are awesome!

And... a no.

Just an update, the Birth Mother took the baby with her from the hospital. So we are back in the mix of looking for a baby. We are joyful and confident that God is in control, but we hurt for the wellfare of that baby boy. Please pray for him. Thank you so much for your prayers for us, we are truly grateful!

Pictures

I thought you might like to see some pictures! :)

Daddy and his daughter during Labor Day weekend.

Going on some trails! It was so pretty and fun. And yes, those are fishing poles, we went fishing.

"Hold me closer tiny dancer..." Our little dancer.

She came to me the other day and said, "Look Mom! I've got a baby in my tummy." Silly girl

She sleeps WILD, just like her Mommy used to.

Most days she is dressed up like a princess. All day long. :)

There's a little update in pictures of what we've been doing. Have a good day!

Praying

Please pray with us for an adoption situation. Pray that the Birth Mother will make the decision to do what is best for her and her child. I will not give specifics, out of respect for our situation, and for the Birth Mother. But please pray for her and the baby.

Andddd we're back

Sorry that I haven't blogged in a week. Sheesh, I need to get a grip, eh? (I'm way to close to the Canadian border.) Anyways, we're still here, still waiting. I don't know how many of you remember last year around this time (right before we moved up here), the 35W bridge collapsed in Minneapolis. Well, this morning bright and early it reopened! We are pumped, because it's our route to church, and it takes a long time to get down there through the detours.

I'm posting a video that Abraham Piper did with some of our friends in the background, who went this morning to be some of the first people to go across the bridge. Pretty funny stuff!

The natural cycle

Update on the waiting game. Our AMAZING Social worker has blessed me time and time again with words of comfort and wisdom. I called her yesterday to see how things were going and to ask her a few questions. She is always so helpful. She spoke to me concerning the natural cycle that seems to happen in adoptive "waiting" families. Every 4 to 6 weeks there are the same emotions:

-waiting in complete joy
-doubts enter in
-continue to wait
-then make a call the the social worker

Ha! :)

So last night was the call making day to just re-evaluate where we were, what to expect and what actions to take if necessary. We spent time in prayer last night, and still feel peace in waiting - though the peace isn't always easy.

My times spent in the Word daily are always such a blessing, and seems like the Lord gives me just enough manna to get me through the day. I pray everyday, "Lord, even today You could give us our child, but I wait in full trust and assurance that You are at work. I plead with You, Father, to bring us our child today; but above all, You're will be done in this."

Buster Boy

Readers, meet our little miniature doxie, Buster. He is a "pound puppy", who came to our family over a year ago. He was and is a wonderful addition to our family, and we love him very much.

Saturday was a pretty normal day, we got up, drank coffee, read the newspaper, went to Costco, etc... When we got up from our nap, we noticed that Buster was being extra wild and frisky. He was literally bouncing off our furniture and being a stinker. But he was really funny. He was running all over the couches, and jumping from one to the other with his ears tucked back like a wild man. We were all laughing so hard at him. And he kept needed to go outside to go pee.

My hubby and I didn't know what the deal was. He had his multivitamin and food like usual. So what was the deal?! Well, little did I know was I was going to find out. :) I'm picking up around the house, and go get my coffee mug in the living room, only to find it empty. I vividly remember there being quite a bit left from this morning. And I asked the hubby if he drank it, and he said, "No I didn't drink your coffee."

BUSTER DRANK 3/4 OF MY COFFEE!!!! Keep in mind he's 5 lbs (soak and wet), so in ratio that was like an adult drinking 42oz. of coffee! No wonder he was wired like a rat on acid and had to go pee so much. Coffee's a diuretic. He had stuck his little face in my coffee cup and licked it CLEAN. HAHA!

Who knew my dog would like Dunkin Donuts coffee so much? He does fit in our family well. :)

Growing up *sniff sniff*

Guess who starts dance next week? Me?! No way, my mad dance skills are all natural. My little girl starts dance on Monday. After watching, (way too much) Shirley Temple in The Little Princess, tapping was/is a regular occurrence in our house. And it wasn't just Daddy tap dancing pretending to be in the River Dance, Mia was doing a song and dance number quite frequently.

Pretty much we lived in a musical.

This was prior to the Olympics. Now, I am a former gymnast and I LOVE LOVE LOVE watching women's gymnastics in the Olympics. (Don't get me started on the partial, inexperienced, and ignorant judging that took place this year.) Mia watched the Olympic gymnastics, which she has taken one little class at the YMCA... she loved it. She proclaimed, "Mommy, I want to do gymnastics! I want to win a gold medal!"

*insert pride, dashed hopes of my past and chance to live vicariously through my daughter*

"GREAT! I'll look up classes right now!" I enthusiastically announced, as I grab the Itouch.

Much to my dismay, my dear husband says, "Um, no. I think she'd really like dance better."

So after much deliberation and tears shed on my behalf (so what if I want to make a comeback, and train for gymnastics in the 2012 Olympics in London). I really didn't cry. But we decided to put her in dance. *gasp* We're Baptist. I know. Thankfully no longer in the South to live with that stigma.

I'll post pictures on Monday or Tuesday. She looks mighty cute in her little tu-tu and dance shoes. And I cannot wait to see her face when she gets to wear a super cute costume and dance in the recital. Oh dear. She will be too much.

I also just ordered her school stuff for this year! I CANNOT believe it! Yes, we've been doing preschool stuff for a year and a half, but this is Pre-K. So starting the first week in October (obviously after the DG conference), we'll be doing school regularly. ACK! She's getting so big.

Elisa, now you know...

that I read your blog. ;) She tagged me and quite honestly, I've never been tagged before so here goes.

4 Things I Was Doing Ten Years Ago

1. Starting my sophomore year of high school.
2. Way too vain for my own good.
3. More than likely fighting with my Mom.
4. Playing the piano.

4 Things On My To-Do List Today

1. Get Miss Princess Pants ready for bed.
2. Nightly devotions and prayer as a family.
3. Read Lord of the Rings with my husband.
4.Figure out a menu and itinerary for when my parents come.

4 Random Things I Love About My Husband

1. He loves Christ.
2. He shows me my Saviour daily, with his patience and love.
3. He is completely random, and really, really funny.
4. He is as passionate as myself about the eternality and seriousness of parenting.

4 Jobs I've Had

1. Personal Assistant at Air Tractor, Inc.
2. Sales rep at Victoria's Secret.
3. Accounting window clerk at CCU.
4. Stay at home wife and mother (BEST JOB EVER).

4 Movies I've Watched More Than Once

1. Pride and Prejudice (almost weekly)
2. Lord of the Rings (extended version)
3. Anne of Green Gables (all the series)
4. Chronicles of Narnia

4 Places I've Lived

1. Olney, TX
2. Denver, CO
3. Abilene, TX
4. St. Paul, MN


4 Places I've Been

1. Mexico
2. Malibu, CA
3. Orlando, FL
4. Charleston, SC

(Clearly, I need a passport.)


4 Places I Want To Visit

1. Germany (to see my friend Kate, whom I miss.)
2. Africa
3. New Zealand
4. Alaska


4 TV Shows I Watch

1. I don't watch TV, and I love that!


4 Things You May Not Know About Me

1. I used to have my belly button pierced (a rebellious time in my life). But did not think it was a good example for my daughter(My reasons were vain and sinful), so I let it grow up.
2. I have a friend who plays pro-basketball.
3. I never read a book in its entirety until I was in college.
4. I play the oboe.

I'll soak while I wait!

Oh the joys of waiting. My heart loooongs to have another child, and God knows my heart's desire. But HIS desire for me, and for everyone of us, is to long for Him more than anything or anyone else. The past two weeks He and I have been going around and around on this issue. I say with my lips, "You're all I want, Lord." And He said, "Am I? Do you want me more than the child that I took from you? And what about the child I'm holding for you now?" I pause. The pause in my heart shows Him at any given moment what state my heart is in.

In that moment, I do not know what to do or say. Honestly, I do not have to say anything - He already knows. But I am not learning this lesson quickly. Truth be told, I am really hard headed and one of "the" stiffed necked people. *shocker* While I am in that moment I must speak to my soul the Word of God, the Scripture that I feel is the lesson I must learn. My soul keeps hearing my flesh speak, but what it needs SCREAMED into it is this:

"Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you." (Psalm 33: 20-22)

Satan is cunning, our flesh is cunning, even our own hearts (in the midst of being changed) speak lies against the Lord's will for us. I wanted a baby.... well yesterday, but God wants me to wait, on HIM. My flesh must be beaten into submission by the Word of God. Audibly, I say "MY soul waits for the LORD!" I'm not waiting on the agency, social worker, or birth mother. On the contrary, I'm waiting on the Lord to do what He deems best, and the sooner my flesh gets the message the more joyful I will be.


God is at work, no doubt.

Oh the fair

This morning we went to the MN State Fair. What a blast! We were with great friends, and the weather was perfect. We ate, and we ate... and ate some more. Here are a few pics of our time there.

Our little farmer. :)

Missy and E riding in the airplane! I love this pic of them.

M, E, and Missy in the Frog Hopper.

Hugs, while being Little Helpers, learning about farming.

Last stop of the day, the BIG slide. Her face was priceless... terrified!

Staying busy

Everyday seems to pass a little bit slower since the whole whirlwind of the past two weeks. The boys were placed in their forever home yesterday morning. Which was bittersweet, though I rejoice in their blessing and the family that they were placed with. I'm continuing my life, daily routines, and preparations for a baby all the while praying that the phone will ring with news of our child.

Enough of that, for now though. I have a funny story. Sunday night we were hanging out, and decided to go fishing. We went to this nice quiet lake near our house. Missy was playing like usual, totally soaked in water up to her knees. Anyhow, we caught a few "sunnies" which Buster wanted to eat. (Rest assured to our vet and good friend, we didn't let him eat them.) Time to leave, and we get home to strip off those fishy smelling clothes. Missy takes off her shoes, and has something on her foot that she says, "Mom, I can get this off my foot." I proceed to get her to hurry, and tell her that I'll get it off. Little did I know, IT WAS A LEACH! YUCK! A little one, but still slimy and stuck on my precious daughter's foot. :) I screamed, because I've never seen a leach in real life, outside of the movie "Stand by Me", any one remember that one? Upon which, she begins to freak out, tears included at no charge. I get it off, and Daddy comes in the bathroom to investigate. We got it off without a mark on her, but she was hysterical. The waterworks are still coming, and she's crying, all the while saying, "It just sucked all my blood out! It sucked my blood out! The leach sucked my blood!"

By this point I'm laughing hysterically, which causes her more tears, probably from embarassment. But it was so funny! Seriously? It really just sucked all your blood out? Kids thought process just kills me. They really do say the darnest things, don't they?

After a bath, and full explination of our body's circulatory system (which we had recently checked out a book about that very subject from the library), she was fine. We have one drama queen on our hands, and boy does she know how to perform!

Still waiting

The last week and a half has sure been a whirlwind of emotions. Naturally, I'm like my Dad, and I don't get my feathers ruffled easily, unless it is over theology. Anyways, we got a call on last Friday about a little boy who is 2 1/2, and his mother wanted to give him up. We prayed, and then were on conference call with our social worker (best in the world) and the NC agency. We found out that our adopting him would be contingent upon us accepting his older 4 year old brother if and when he was given up. Well, that's a whole new scenario then what we first heard. We prayed again, and told them no because the four year old is two months older than our daughter. We don't want to change the birth order. Mind you, this was all taking place right before Kevin and I were to go out before our anniversary. As of Monday, his mother was wanting him back. So we felt like we heard the Lord. Done, we made a decision and put our feet down, right?

Wrong! We get a call Tuesday morning about the same little boy. His mother was in the office wanting to choose a family for him and couldn't take him home. The new arrangement would not be contingent upon the older brother. We needed to make a decision in 10 minutes. We prayed again, sought counsel and told them we would not make a decision that day, but that we would call them back the next day. We called them back in the morning, with a "yes" if he was still available. The day before the agency showed her our profile with other ones, and she chose us! All fine and good, until she decided to take him home that night. Talk about a back and forth, unstable mindset. Poor woman and poor little boy!

I really didn't think that I would be hurt, because we weren't wanting an older child we preferred an infant. But my heart was a bit hurt because we finally decided yes we'll take him, and then the rug got swept out from under us. But what keeps me anchored is God's providence and the knowledge that He always does what seems best to Him, not to me, but to Him.

And again, we wait. Still waiting.

"And though the waiting is the hardest
part of everything I do
I do confess it's getting better
knowing I will be with you.

It's alright, it's okay
I won't worry about tomorrow
for it bring me one more day
closer than I was to you
closer than I was to you"
-Mack Powell

Charismania

I've stood face to face with Pastor John and asked him what he felt Scripture says about certain things pertaining to the "so-called" charismatic movement. He gave me unwavering answers, and I kept the questions coming. If you know me, I ask TONS of questions - it has gotten me into trouble before, but not this time... I think he kind of liked the challenge. This blog entry is powerful, and a warning in my heart to stay in the Word.

My goal in raising a daughter...

is one who is a godly girl! I fully endorse this article. Read this entry on GirlTalk!

The things my hubby does

truly make me fall in love with him all over again. Saturday was our anniversary, but decided Friday night to celebrate. We went to a GREAT restaurant in Minneapolis. We don't go out on dates... hardly ever (like only on our anniversary, ok not that bad but really), and this was a blessing. I enjoyed our conversation and the meal was spectacular.

Side note: Then Saturday night, I had a girl's night down in Stillwater with a group of my good friends. We went and had dinner by the river, talked and laughed. Then headed down to the riverside to talk and laugh more. Finally strolling to the coffee house to finish the night off well. We got our coffee, after much more laughter and hysterics, settled down out on the patio for more talk and laughter. I must say this, I have NEVER in my life had a group of girl friends like I do right now, and I am BLESSED beyond all belief. God answered many prayers from my heart when He brought these women in my life. Not to mention I have more girl friends that didn't go on the trip, that are precious to me, as well. (One of them just moved and I'm really sad about that, but she'll be back soon enough.)

I digress.

When I got back to the house my hubby said, "Hey, I want you to come downstairs and look at something. I found this bike and I wanna see if you like it." (I need a new one) It was love at first sight, really with both parties involved. :) He went the next day and bought it for me. We came home and he had me on it, adjusting everything where it would work for me, and honestly just making a big fuss over me. I.LOVED.IT. He thought nothing of it, and wondered why I was all gushy over him. But really... he took the initiative, did he research on the bike, called the owners, bought it for me, and made sure it worked for my short frame. I did nothing.







He is truly PRECIOUS, and I am one lucky woman... he's mine, all mine. :)

On the adoption front

Things are going... well slowly, but I know that God is working because my heart is being exposed. I hate hate hate waiting on anything, as do many of my fellow "microwave" generation cohorts. We are opting to work with yet another agency, so we are going to be working with two agencies in finding a child. Now these two agencies are "friends" and work together quite frequently. Our social worker gave us this option, and we are eager to get started with the new.

More paper work, trips to the notary and stamps. But oh for the joy of a phone call saying, "We have a baby for you!" I pray every night that the Lord would work on my heart, to make it more like His - in accepting us as His own, grafting us in. I want to graft our future adopted child(ren) into our family. We will soon get the opportunity to see a child that isn't ours' from the womb, but directly from the hand of God. To look upon their face and see the wonder and majesty of God, through the little bitty finger nails, their eye lashes, hiccups, etc. What a blessing it is to have the chance of a lifetime to be a parent, again. What a gift!

Sweeeeet!

My good friend Kacy posted this on her hubby's blog. Hysterical! I love it!

She sings.

Last night on our way home from downtown small group we were serinaded from the backseat. Our sweet little girl sang a pretty good song.... totally an original.

"He never lets go! Jesus never lets go of us. He never lets go of His sheeeeep, His peeeeeople... or His (higher pitch) hooorsies! He never lets go!

We might want to think about a more accurate depiction of Reformed thinking in our preschooler. Pretty cute though.

The 4th, a Birthday & Ohhh the Strawberries!

The 4th of July!

Buster looking patriotic in the lawn chair. :)

The girl in her 4th garb at the lake.

Daddy and his daughter fishing and getting eating ALIVE by mosquitoes.


We went to Stillwater to hang out and eat dinner for my birthday.

She found a leaf! Pretty excited.

Summer feet.

We went strawberry picking with some friends Saturday morning. Pretty much one of the coolest mornings since living in MN. We had such a good time, the weather was GREAT and it was a much needed trip

Here's our girl with one of the friends we went with.

The strawberry before she ate it.

Daddy pretending to eat one.

The girls picking berries.

Our girl just plopped right down on the ground. Funny kid.

They decided to take a break and go for a little walk. Such a pretty day.

That was my box. All together we picked over 37lbs of strawberries!

So, of course we went back to the house and made jam! Quite a lot of jam, and it's soooo good.

Another way to figure out what to do with all those strawberries, is of course to look up ideas in the Strawberry Shortcake cookbook! (sorry it's sideways.)