Growing up, you are taught several ways of dealing with anger and frustration in ways that don't hurt others and don't hurt their feelings. Yell into a pillow, count to 10, etc. Well, one of these techniques was to write a letter to someone who hurt you. You can point out how they hurt you. Explain how you feel. Even tell them how mad you are and how you secretly wish something bad happened to them. When the letter is complete, you sign the letter, seal the envelope, and promptly throw the letter away. What a waste, right?
Wrong.
Some things are better left unsaid. It could hurt someone. It's ok that you feel that way, but it's not always ok to share those feelings. I used this technique recently. I wrote a blog post. It's something that I had wanted to write for a while because it had been on my mind. I was bugged. I needed to vent. So I wrote the post. But because of some technical difficulties, I was not able to post it right away. I am thankful for these difficulties. I felt better after writing the blog. I was relieved. I expressed my feelings and it somehow simultaneously validated them.
When I got the chance to post those words I had carefully constructed, I didn't. I deleted the text. I had gotten what I needed out of writing that post and any other byproduct would have been something I had not wanted. Perhaps one of my blog readers (all 2 of them) had read this outburst and had been hurt. How awful that would have been. I am thankful for this technique I learned as a child. And I am thankful that I can use writing as an outlet and that I can throw it away without hurting someone.
